A/N: Welcome to the merge! I really enjoyed writing this one.
A barren tundra is shown with Chef's horrible crash landing causing the plane to spin out of control. "Last time on total drama world tour." The contestants are shown freezing as they stand on the ice. "The gang nearly turned into Swedish meatball pops." Alejandro is shown in the confessional , then talking with Anne Maria, then Brick's wooden face is shown. "But our competition heated way up as Alejandro did everything to throw off team Valkyrie resulting in something hilarious!"
Brick's face is shown sinking, then team Chris is shown saving the Valkyrie's, Dawn is shown bumping into the cannon, then Eva taking out the boat. "Brick's face sunk, while real Brick proved to be honorable, going back to save the enemy. Thanks to a little accident from Dawn, Xena's shot missed resulting in a loss."
Xena is shown talking to Jo."In order to avoid her nature being revealed Xena got Jo to eliminate Dawn."
Chris and Chef are in the cockpit. "This time I'm adding someone who's going to kick things up to thermonuclear. This show is so hot it'll take about a bizillon gallons of water to cool us off. And we got them. Coming up On Total! Drama! Woooorrrrlllddd~ Tooouuurrrr~!"
Intro
A stage light pops up in front of the CN tower, we switch to the interior of the plane as another light pops out of the ceiling, outside the plane a camera pops out of the engine startling a raccoon, we see a suitcase pop open and a clap board is used. The camera moves through first class passing a drink cart on the way and causing Chris to jump out of the aisle.
Dear Mom and Dad, I'm doin' fine;
(Chef is in the cockpit, the cook gives the camera glare as it passes through. The camera moves past several baggage trucks.)
You guys are on my mind!
(The camera moves past the CN tower and dives into the water.)
Ya asked me what I wanted to be,
(Lightning is swimming in the water when he spots a shark and begins to fight with it.)
And now I think the answer is plain to see!
(Harold stands on top of the straw roof of a hut on a woven boat. An oar flies threw the air to hit him.)
I wanna be...famous!
(Amber and Topher are fighting on the boat, and it is clear one of them accidently hit Harold in the tussle. Crocodiles leap from the water snapping their jaws. The boat moves off screen and we see a crocodile wince on the word be. The camera moves back to the boat revealing it had run into an inflatable raft where Alejandro is standing. Amber panics and tries to help while Topher just laughs.)
I wanna live close to the sun!
(The camera moves to the statue of liberty, we cut to the top where Brick is offering Jo a helping hand, only for her to grab it and body slam him instead.)
Well pack your bags, 'cause I've already won!
(Tyler runs past the two, pushing a baby carriage holding Noah. Max is nearby and the jock trips over her, sending Noah flying out of the carriage and into a sign.)
Everythin' to prove,
(Noah lands in Eva's arms as she stands on a tundra. He gives her a grateful smile.)
Nothin' in my way;
I'll get there one day.
(We pan right where Amy rolls her eyes. A polar bear taps on her shoulder and she looks horrified, but then Dawn and Ella calm the bear and Amy smiles.)
'Cause I wanna be...famous!
(We zoom in past ice caps to see Duncan and Gwen surfing a giant wave. It seems to be too much as they are swept up in the surf.)
Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa
(Xena and Anne Maria are walking across a New York City crosswalk. They are startled as the jet passes them, sending leaves through the air. We switch to a scene of the contestants in a human pyramid atop the jet, wearing parachutes and kicking in beat. The bottom row contains Jo, Anne Maria, Harold, Max, Xena, and Brick. The first row up contains Topher, Amber Alejandro, Eva, and Noah, the next row up contains Duncan, Gwen, Amy, and Tyler, on top of the pyramid is Lightning holding Ella and Dawn on one of his shoulders each.)
I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)
(The plane passes big ben,causing the clock face to pop out. It passes the arc de Triomphe causing a mime to drop his croissant. It flies past a rock balancing on.a stone pillar, knocking it off and causing it to fall in front of the camera kicking up dust)
I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)
(The dust clears to show, Ella and Dawn smiling at one another, It pans to show Eva glaring, then down to Jo.)
(The lyrics end and we see Chef Hatchet glare. He turns the plane, sending all the contestants falling through the air in parachutes. Everyone but Max lands in front of a sign with the show's name on it. As the song ends Max lands face first in the middle of the group)
The episode proper begins with the jet flying through the air. We cut to the cargo hold. All of the contestants are lying on the floor except for Brick. A blonde intern managed to drag the cadet to the rest of them.
A ripple effect takes us to what we can only assume is Brick's dream. He stood in first class with Jo. "I'm really glad we're finally on good terms."
The jockette scoffed. "Please, I'm just using you to get further in the game."
Brick placed a hand on her shoulder. "I don't believe that's true."
Jo pushed him to the floor. "Who cares what you think!" The force of her push makes the floor of the plane break beneath Brick. Brick began to fall through the air as the jockette looked down at him with regret shining in her eyes.
That was when Brick woke up to find himself falling through the air, along with the other seven competitors. "What! Soldiers wake up! We're falling!"
Jo is next to wake and she screams as well. Everyone else wakes up and screams. From above they hear Chris call down. "Hey kids, you better get into your paddle boats!"
Sure enough there are two swan shaped paddle boats falling through the air with them. Brick, Jo, Anne Maria, and Xena all grab one, while Alejandro, Noah, Eva, and Tyler grab the other. They barely manage to make it in before the boats land in the water.
"Wow, I know Chris wants to kill us, but this is a bit much even for him." Anne Maria said.
In the other boat Tyler's eyes widened. "Water!"
"Yes Tyler we are in water." Noah deadpanned.
"No!" Alejandro gasped. "Waterfall! Quick paddle!"
Everyone began to paddle as quickly as they could. Some of them began to pray. "If you let us live I'll be less clumsy!" Tyler exclaimed.
"If you let us live I'll pretend I believe that." Anne Maria scoffed.
"My only regret is that I don't know who's stronger, Eva or Jo." Noah sighed.
"Obviously, I'm stronger!" Jo said.
"No way!" Eva said.
"Yes way, I'll prove it. Last one to get their paddle boat to shore loses!" Jo said.
Instantly Eva and Jo began to paddle as quickly as they could, clearly trying to prove which of them were superior. Both paddle boats crashed into shore. When the sand clears Jo is cheering. "I won!"
"What?! I clearly won!" Eva snapped. She turned to Noah. "Hey who won?"
"I don't know. I was fearing for my life." the cynic gasped.
[confessional]
Noah: Yeah that was a ploy to give the girls motivation to save us. I'm just relieved it worked.
Static
Chris finally decided to show up. "So, Niagara Falls is pretty awesome eh?"
"It nearly killed us!" Alejandro snapped.
"Like I said, awesome." Chris replied. "The falls is the jewel in Canada's crown and one of the top ten natural wonders of the world. It's also known for its fabulous casino, which is where we'll be heading for the first part of the challenge." He explained.
"Really?" Anne Maria gasped. A flip transition later she looked far less enthused. "Really?"
"Since you're all underage, we had to move the challenge, from the gambling floor to the far less exciting casino concert hall." Chris said.
"Considering the stage I assume there's going to be a song soon?" Xena said.
"Actually you're in luck." Chris says. "Last time on the Aftermath show, they had a Second Chance Challenge, where one of the losers could score a spot back in the game. And we're about to enjoy a little number from the winner."
"I hope it's Gwen." Brick said. "I still feel bad about her elimination."
"Amber? I've missed her a lot." Alejandro said.
"Please, it doesn't matter who comes back, they're just another person in my way of the million." Jo scoffed.
"You're all wrong! He's everyone's favorite Total Drama fanboy, here to reclaim his spot in the game, it's Topher!" Chris announced.
Several people groan. Anne Maria looked ecstatic. "Yes!"
[Song twenty-two: Topherific]
A three tier waterfall came out from under the stage. At the top stood a barrel, and on top of the barrel was Topher. Who began to dance. "T-t-t-topherific, is my name. Causing Drama is my game." He's shown on a red carpet where he poses for paparazzi. "Invading your TV with my Topherlicious fame!
We see that the red carpet show is on a tv. Anne Maria pops up and gestures with a grand sweep of her arm. "T-topherific! S-s-so terrific!
Topher steps on stage and blows the 'audience' a kiss. "You know I'm famous. Famous!
Xena gave Chris a flat look as she sang the next line. "I hate this part of the game, the rules are always so inane."
Chris smirks at her and gestures to the once again posing Topher. ": Rules? This ain't no Sunday School! And returns are a rating's jewel!"
Topher walks across the stage as Brick chimed in for part of the reprise. "T-topherific"
He passes Alejandro, who rolls his eyes as he sings his line. "So narcissistic!"
Topher pulled a cord that made Alejandro fall through a trap door I'm fa-fa-famous. Famous!
Topher stepped on to part of the stage which had been given a background of a crowd . "I'm gonna cause so much drama you won't know what hit you! I'm so Malefic"
He turns around and passes Tyler and Jo
.
Tyler looked confused as he sang. "He's Topherific?"
Jo scoffed "So-so horrific."
Topher: You know I'm-
His reprise is interrupted by Noah rolling his eyes as he said. "You know you're not any more famous than the rest of us right?"
Topher glared. "Uh yes I am! Are any of you in a band? Have you sold out your shows? Do you have an entire Arena of fans screaming your name?No. No you don't.
Topher is next shown in a science lab wearing safety glasses as he mixes chemicals. "It's a fact and scientific, that I'm still Topherific!"
The chemical mixture explodes. Eva and Noah are shown back to back with fire extinguishers as they close the song out. "He's not so famous, turns out He's not so famous!"
Topher rolled his whatever. "So, which team am I on?"
"You're on your own. Because as of right now, there are no more teams!" Chris declared.
Topher smirked. "I expected as much."
Anne Maria joined him immediately. "I've missed you. You're like the only one besides me with any taste."
Brick approached Jo. "So, now that we're merged, do you still want to work together?"
Jo huffed. "Sure, but you'll have to keep up with me. I don't work with dead weight."
A loud scraping noise came from the stage. In walked Chef wearing a wedding dress, complete with veil and pushing a giant red slot machine with gold trim. A gold dollar sign was on the front, and the slots displayed Noah, Alejandro, and Brick's faces. A door was at the bottom, and the handle was gold as well.
Since we are in the honeymoon capital of the world, I thought it'd be cool to drop some arranged marriages on you." Chris began. "Check it, slots o' fun for me. Not so fun for you." Chef pulled the handle. "Each girl pulls the lever to win a husband, who she'll team up with for today's challenge." Three of Tyler's faces aligned.
"Ooh. Who's filling in the extra space? Can I be a bride? I'd willingly fake marry any of these guys!" Topher said.
Chris chuckled. "While the idea of you crossdressing on international TV is funny, we've already got our extra bride." The stage shook as the Sasqatchnakwa joined the girls.
[Confessional]
Topher: Aw, I'd have loved being a bride.
Static
All of the guys were shoved into the giant slot machine." Let the games begin! Anne Maria, you're up." Chris said.
The Jersey Reject pulled the lever. Three faces of Topher were aligned. He slid out of the machine. "Well if I have to fake marry a girl at least it's you." He smiled.
"I was hoping for Alejandro but you'll do." Anne Maria smirked.
"Xena you're next." Chris said.
The overlogical girl pulled the lever. Tyler tumbled out. "Excellent, we already have a good rapport so our odds of winning are better."
"Yeah!" Tyler agreed.
"Jo?" Chris asked.
The jockette pulled the lever. "Anyone but Brick. Anyone but Brick." Three faces of Brick align. "Shit."
"It looks like we're a team for this challenge." Brick smiled.
"Whatever, just pull your weight okay?" Jo said.
"Eva, your go." Chris told her.
The iron woman pulled the lever and three of Noah's faces aligned. He falls out of the machine. "Ugh. I really hope they don't expect me to hold you in a bridal carry."
"I don't think you could carry one of my arms." Eva scoffed.
The Sasquatchnakwa ran over to the machine and pulled the lever. Alejandro fell out of the machine into its arms. "Oh no. Not you!" The creature kissed him.
Chris laughed and turned to face the camera. "How will our couples fare in the challenge? Can Alejandro learn to love his new bride? Find out after the break!"
/
The second part of the episode begins with each of the guys standing at the top of one of four large columns with a gold heart shaped arch at the top. Their partner was before them, blindfolded. In front of them was an obstacle course. First three shallow, turtle shaped kiddie pools, two filled with water and one with chocolate pudding. This was followed by a sandpit with three towers in it, and another chocolate pudding filled pool. Next was a confetti cannon, two wedding cakes, and a large bell. Then two more confetti cannons, and two more sand pits. At the far end were five wedding dresses. A low v neck, a top and skirt combo, a princessesque dress, one sleeveless and a giant one clearly meant for the yeti.
"Because a good marriage is based on trust and the ability to argue louder than your spouse, each groom will use a megaphone to guide his blindfolded Bride to her gown. Only couples with a dress can continue. Go!" Chris explained.
"Xena, go left." Tyler said. The over logical girl did so. "No! Your other left!" it was too late however as she fell into a chocolate pool. "Uh, sorry?"
[Confessional]
Tyler: I'm not good with directions.
Static
"Okay Eva, you need to go-" Noah began but before he could finish Eva walked through the entire course, getting covered in cake, chocolate pudding, and hitting against one bell. She took her blindfold off as she reached the sleeveless wedding dress. Noah stared at her.
"What? He said we had to get to the dress. I took the easiest path." Eva told him.
Noah shrugged. "Less work for me."
Jo and Brick were about halfway through the course. "Brick, hurry up! I think someone's already made it to their dress!"
"Move left around the wedding cake." Brick told her.
"Ugh! This is taking too long. Just give me the rest of the directions!" The jockette ordered.
"Fine, after that you need to move forward between the confetti cannons, then three paces left to avoid the sandpit, and then just walk forward." Brick told her.
Jo followed his directions until she made it to her dress. "About time!" She complained as she removed her blindfold. She winced at the sight of the low v neck. "Ugh. I have to wear this?"
/
Tyler is still working with Xena. "Okay now move right." The overlogical girl moved left. "I said right!"
"I know, but you've been wrong every other time so logically-" Xena explained as she fell into another pool of chocolate. "Tyler?"
"What?" He asked.
"I'm beginning to think logic doesn't apply to you." The over logical girl told him.
Topher and Anne Maria are doing a little better. "Okay, now move right around the wedding cake." The jersey reject did so. "There's a bell-" Anne Maria slammed her head against it. "You okay?"
"Why wouldn't I be?" She asked.
Topher smirked. "That hair has its uses. Now just walk forward and you'll make it to your dress."
Anne Maria did so and got to the skirt and top combo. "Oh yeah! I can rock the heck outta this!"
Alejandro and the sasquatchnakwa were not doing well. It runs directly into another wedding cake. "I told you to go left. Do you not know what left is? Do you even understand me?" The Spaniard rubbed his temples. The yeti shrugged. Alejandro sighed. "Why did I have to get stuck with you?"
Xena finally made it to her dress, the princess looking one. "Well it was an arduous trip, but we did make it."
Chris was about to say something when the Saaquatchnakwa hit against a confetti cannon making it go off. Now startled, it ran the rest of the way through the course to its dress. "I guess you all move on?"
[Confessional]
Alejandro: On the one hand I'm still in the challenge, on the other, I have to marry that thing.
Static
The five 'couples' stood on a wooden platform with the Canadian flag , in front of them the falls roared, the only way across a single tightrope, leading to a second platform with an American flag and a small booth on it. Chef stood within the booth wearing his pilot outfit. Each 'bride' wore her dress
Chris began his usual speech. "I like to call this next challenge, Till Death do you Part'!"
"We nearly died from it this morning, now we have to walk over it on a tightrope?" Noah scoffed.
"Even better!" Chris replied. "One member of each couple has to carry his or her partner across the gorge, and then, you've gotta successfully clear Customs!" Chef waved from across the rope, he's wearing a security guard uniform. "First pair to do so wins invincibility, and a pimped out wedding reception in first class. Noah and Eva won the challenge, so I'm giving them a head start."
"I'll be carrying you." Eva told him.
"I figured as much." Noah smirked.
"I nearly forgot." Chris said "Because the falls weren't quite unpleasant enough, we stocked them with hungry, hungry sharks." At the bottom of the falls was a boat with sharks on it. All looking prepared to eat. About half the remaining contestants freaked out. The other half looked resigned.
"I can't believe I'm wearing a dress." Jo complained. "I look horrible."
"You look beautiful." Brick told her.
"You're just saying that because you're nice." The jockette scoffed.
The focus shifted over to Xena and Topher. "Hey, Xena, nice to see you again. You've gotten really emotional lately haven't you?" The blonde said.
"I have not." Xena replied.
"Oh but you have. Your concern for Tyler when he got injured was inspiring." Topher told her.
"That was simply logic. If Tyler could not compete then we were at a disadvantage." Xena told him.
"Right. I'm just saying, I don't think logic was the only thing influencing that decision." The blonde smirked.
[Confessional]
Topher: We all know Xena's on the verge of going villain. All she needs is a little push, and I'm here to provide it.
Static
"Well let's get this over with." Eva said as she stepped out on the tightrope. They got a few feet out.
"And remember,violence is never the answer. Except on this show, Go!" Chris said, allowing the others to start across.
The sasquatchnakwa took off immediately, running Noah and Eva right over and causing them to fall off the tightrope, Alejandro an unwilling passenger in its grasp.
Further back, Tyler tripped almost immediately and barely managed to grasp on to the tightrope with his strong fingers. "I'll try to pull us up." He told her.
Topher smirked as he and Anne Maria reached them. "Oh look, someone's trying to hang on. Well let's see how long it takes to get you to let go." Topher slammed his foot down on Tyler's hand making him let go. "Aww, I was hoping you'd last a little longer."
Brick was starting across the tightrope holding Jo. "Everyone's ahead! Move it Sargent Slowpoke!"
"I don't want to drop you." Brick told her.
Meanwhile Alejandro and the Sasquatchnakwa have made it to the other side.
"Business or pleasure?" Chef asked.
"Business." Alejandro said from his spot on the yeti's shoulder.
"'Kay then. few questions first. What is Canada's capital?" Chef asked.
Before Alejandro could answer the yeti grunted.
"Sorry I didn't catch that." Chef told it.
Alejandro once again tried to answer, but the creature beat him to it.
"I don't understand." The chef said.
The Sasquatchnakwa growled loudly in anger.
"Anger issues are not tolerated. You're deported. " Chef said.
The Sasquatchnakwa began to run back down the tightrope. "You know I could have answered that question." Alejandro complained. The yeti grunted. "No, I'm not saying you're an idiot but you don't know English so I should do the talking." The creature gave an angry grunt. "No it's not because you're playing the female role in the relationship!"
The argument distracted the two of them enough that they didn't notice as they ran directly into Topher and Anne Maria, sending all four of them off the tightrope.
Now the only ones to remain, Brick and Jo made it to the other side.
What is Canada's capital?" Chef asked.
"Ottawa," Jo answered.
"What leaf is on Canada's flag?"
"The maple leaf," Brick said.
"What is the name of Canada's famous fishing and racing schooner?"
"The Schooner Bluenose," The cadet replied.
"What is Canada's national dessert?"
"Butter tarts. Jo replied.
"What is the national animal of Canada?"
"Beavers." They both answered.
"You got 'em all right! Anything to declare?" Chef asked.
"I declare that my wife is more lovely than she gives herself credit for.' Brick smiled.
"And I declare that I want out of this dress!" Jo complained
They stepped on to the platform. Chris arrived. "Congrats, you guys. You'll be traveling together in first class, and you both have immunity. Which means you can't vote for each other."
From the bottom of the falls eight voices scream. "Chris help us!"
The host smirked. "Music to my ears."
[Confessional]
Topher: Today went well I think. Sure Brick and Jo won, but I know exactly who I want to get eliminated. And I don't think it'll be hard to convince people.
Static
Topher stepped out to see Alejandro. "Just the man I wanted to see."
"Topher. I'm not teaming up with you." The Spaniard deadpanned.
"And you don't need to. I just figured I should point out a potential alliance to rival yours." The blonde smirked.
Alejandro sighed. "Okay, I'm listening."
"Brick and Jo are both immune, but we know Brick likes Jo so they'll probably stay teamed up, and of course Tyler is friends with Brick. Xena is close to Tyler. In other words we need to get rid of Xena or Tyler, and personally I think Tyler's the best choice. Xena will be easier to persuade." The blonde explained.
"You do make a point…" The Spaniard trailed.
/
Everyone was sitting at elimination. Chris was sitting at his makeshift podium; he began the ceremony. "Brick and Jo have immunity. Everyone else is fair game. What's it gonna be?" He began to look through the votes. " Interesting… Really? …Huh. Who'd've thought? …Wow."
"Just read the votes already." Jo complained.
"Okay, okay, hold on to your sweatshirt" Chris retorted. "Four votes for Alejandro…"
The Spaniard's eyes widened. "I didn't know people wanted me gone that much."
"And five votes for…Tyler!" Chris declared.
"What?" Tyler, Xena, And Brick exclaimed.
"You're outta here." the host smirked.
"Oh, okay." Tyler turned to them all. "Hey at least I merged this time! And I had a great time. Brick I'm rooting for you, I know you can get her."
The cadet blushed. "Thanks."
"And Xena, thanks for being my friend. I'm gonna miss you." The jock said.
Xena's eyes had glazed over, but no tears fell. "I will miss you too."
Tyler went to exit the plane with his parachute but hit his head on the way out. Topher is looking at Xena with a smirk.
[Confessional]
Topher: And now that her only stable source of morality is gone…
Static
Xena: Tyler, why would they… [She took a deep breath.] No. This is a good thing. Tyler was a distraction. Now I can focus on what's most important. Winning.
Static
Chris and Chef are in the cockpit to close out the episode. "Bringing Topher back has paid off already!" He cheered. "What else will Topher do? What's Xena's next move? Will Jo and Brick ever get together? Find out next time, On Total! Drama! Woooorrrrlllddd~ Tooouuurrrr~!"
A/N: And so Tyler leaves. I love him but Xena needs to be isolated. Frankly this was so fun. I love this challenge and I knew what the pairs would end up being. I wasn't sure who was going to be the last Bride, but then I remembered the sasquatchnakwa's crush on Alejandro and figured it'd be a much funnier replacement for Sierra and Cody.
Jo and Brick were obvious. Brick's trying to break down her walls and Jo is desperately scrambling to rebuild it. He recognizes this hence the nightmare at the beginning of the episode. Eva and Noah are an odd couple. Tyler is the only one close to Xena, and of course Anne Maria has to pair with Topher.
Topher's already shaken things up, and he'll continue to do so. You'll notice Max wasn't in this episode, but Ezekiel wasn't in every episode either, and I only want to highlight Max when he has something to do. And he will next episode.