Claire had been tossing and turning for the last two hours. It was one of those nights, the ones where you can't sleep for shit. She tried to lay like a stone and keep her eyes shut. Ideally her mind would stay blank, or at least count sheep. Instead, anxiety laced through her thoughts. She changed positions constantly, hoping if she found the most comfortable one she might have a chance at drifting off before she got so anxious she'd cry. Again.
No chance.
Claire knew deep down why she couldn't sleep. It wasn't the thought of sleeping where the Others once slept. It wasn't cause she hadn't got used to beds again yet, although that was likely part of it. No, it wasn't the added comfort, but rather the lack of it. Of him.
Claire almost prayed Aaron would wake up so she'd have something to distract her. Caring for him was what kept her grounded these days. As long as she could hold his soft little body and stroke his bare little head (now starting to sprout a wispy tuft of blond hair), she was okay.
Thinking of her baby prodded Claire to sit up and swing her bare feet to the cold hardwood floor. It was strange, feeling wood instead of sand or rocks. She didn't like how comfortable it was.
Claire moved to the other side of the bed where Aaron's cradle sat against the wall only a few feet away. She crouched down to him and gazed at his little face. How peaceful he slept. His body moved up and down ever so slightly in tune with the almost imperceptible baby snores that escaped his nose. A small peck of drool dotted the corner of his lips. Claire smiled and softly wiped it away with her thumb. It didn't wake him. She wished it had.
She felt so lonely, when it was just her to watch over Aaron at night.
Claire got up again and moved back towards the bed. She opened the top drawer of the nightstand beside it and stared into its depths. She could barely make out the object inside, so small and dark. She reached her hand inside and grasped it in her fingers. It had a slight chill to it. No body warmth to keep it company. Her thumb traced the letters DS over and over.
A tear slipped down Claire's cheek. She rubbed at it with her hand. This was stupid. How many times was she going to cry about this? It's been a week. He's dead. Accept it.
This thought did not comfort Claire but instead caused more tears to spill down her face. He'sdead.
Not bothering to shut the drawer again, Claire clamped her hand tight over the ring and turned back to Aaron. She picked him up out of his cradle and then grabbed that as well. Aaron let out a breathy noise that revealed he had woken up, but he didn't cry when he recognized he was in his mother's arms.
Moments later, Claire was stepping onto the porch of her new house and lifting her face to the sky, letting the night air dry her tears. She hurried down the steps and into the woods, making sure Aaron's blanket was wrapped tight around him. A few minutes later, she broke through the trees onto the beach. Moonlight glinted off the dock that stretched into the ocean. Claire stopped and took a few deep breaths, taking in the ocean air, the sand between her toes. A small part of her began to feel better.
After that it was not uncommon for Claire's friends to look for her at night and find the young mother sleeping on the sand, her arm protectively laid over her baby's cradle beside her, while the other lay outstretched, its fingers slightly curled as if it held something.
A/N: I didn't like how they didn't show Claire's grief in any way after Charlie's death, so this is me writing it as something that was sort of behind-closed-doors.