Chapter 162
Answers at long last
Note from J.M. Jackson: My apologies for not publishing this chapter last week. I had a really rough week, including learning of the death of a good friend of mine, so Adam, this story, and chapter, I dedicate to you in gratitude of your friendship. You helped me through some dark times, and I will miss you. One day, I hope we will meet again, and have a lot of stories to share.
"Okay, so we're going insane," Ginny replied, her eyes widening as she looked at Dumbledore.
"I can tell you from personal experience that you're not insane. Having been accused of that myself on many occasions, you are most definitely sane," Dumbledore assured them.
"If we're sane, how in the name of Merlin are we talking to you?" Lily asked. "I was there. I watched you die!"
"Sadly, you did. I know you have a lot of questions, and theories. Your biggest question, however, is wondering where you are," Dumbledore said. "Please, walk with me. We'll go for a walk outside, and I'll explain everything to you, before your new quest must begin."
"New quest?" Nagini asked. Dumbledore smiled at her.
"Nagini, I am truly grateful to Lily and Ginny for rescuing you from your fate. It has been far too long, and you look wonderful," Dumbledore said, as the two large doors opened, with Dumbledore leading the way as the four of them walked out into the grounds of Hogwarts.
"Thank you, Albus. We still don't understand how Lily and Ginny were able to do this, to return me to my human form," Nagini admitted.
"I don't know for definite, but I do have my guesses," Dumbledore replied. "There is much we need to discuss, but as to your cure, for lack of a better word, it is because of the power Lily and Ginny have. Their power is growing all the time, as proven by your being here."
"What does that mean, sir?" Ginny asked, frowning in confusion.
"We are in a mindscape, something that is exceptionally difficult for anyone to access. Draco's Aunt Sofia was looking into this, but was murdered before she could complete her research. However, you weren't quite ready to be here, which is why the dreamscape has been so muddled," Dumbledore explained.
"We're in our minds?" Lily asked. "How?"
"Your abilities. You were, before you fainted, talking about a muggle television show, and about entering your mind with Nagini to destroy the Horcrux pieces within you," Dumbledore replied.
"Why didn't you tell us we had Horcrux parts within us?" Ginny asked, stepping in front of Dumbledore. Lily noted that Dumbledore looked completely healthy, his hand looked normal and not cursed. Was he just a figment of their mind? If so, how did he know so much?
"In response to your unasked questions, Lily, one thing I can tell you is that death is not the end of life. There is much that is unknown about our next journey, and as much as I'd like to tell you everything, I am not permitted to do so. There are certain rules that must be obeyed," Dumbledore looked at Lily. "It is only right that you want to know, but some things aren't for knowing, though I am certain Miss Granger would vehemently disagree with me."
"That's for sure," Lily agreed, as Dumbledore waved his hand, with multiple armchairs appearing in front of them. Dumbledore took a seat, with the others each sitting down, feeling the warmth of the sun beaming down on them.
"So, you are real? You're actually here?" Lily asked.
"In spirit, yes, and so I am able to act as a guide. You weren't supposed to be able to come here without assistance, but if there is one thing I have learnt, it is to never underestimate the two of you," Dumbledore chuckled.
"Yeah, Voldemort tends to make that mistake all the time," Lily agreed.
"Indeed, and that will be his undoing," Dumbledore replied. "As to your question, Ginny, and it is a fair question, I did not explain everything because by the time I realised, the bond between you had begun to form. I was unsure what would happen, and so I began to research ways to remove the Horcrux from Lily without harming her. I suspected after you destroyed the Basilisk and showed me Riddle's diary."
"When you told me that Voldemort had put a bit of himself into me?" Lily asked.
"Indeed. I did suspect that, after seeing the Diary, that it was a Horcrux, and that he had put one in you, though I believed it had not been intentional. After all, to do so would mean that he would never be able to kill you, and that was the opposite of his goal," Dumbledore explained.
"Then you began your research?" Nagini asked. "I know how hard you work when you're trying to solve a problem."
"Thank you, Nagini, and yes, I began my research. How could I tell you and Sirius then that you might have a fragment of Voldemort's soul within you? It would terrify you, and Sirius, I feared, might act rashly to try and remove it, which would have harmed you. Not on purpose, but I feared there would be some pain, if not worse," Dumbledore continued.
"As much as I love him, yeah, he might have been quick to act," Lily agreed softly. Dumbledore flashed her a smile, the twinkle in his eye comforting her.
"That isn't always a bad thing, and Sirius is someone I have the utmost respect for. But by the time I was finding a way to remove the Horcrux from you, without causing you pain or killing you, well, you and Ginny were forming your bond, and then, in your fifth year, you both meditated together to try and enter Voldemort's mind. That cemented your bond, and that was when the Horcrux split into two parts, weakening it to the point where it couldn't hurt you," Dumbledore assured them.
"How about me? Can it be removed from me without killing me?" Nagini asked. Dumbledore looked at her, still smiling.
"Yes, it can," he replied, before his smile faded. "That is why you are here. This dreamscape will allow you access to your soul and mind, and you will each be tested, and will need to undergo a trial. At the end of your trial, the Horcrux will be destroyed. Your gifts, your ability to speak Parseltongue, and your strength, will remain, since it has become a part of you, but you will be much closer to destroying Voldemort, both of them."
"The way you say that…" Lily began, before taking a breath. "What happens if we fail the trial?"
"Then," Dumbledore said, his voice low and close to breaking, "You will die."
"What do you mean, another brainwave pattern? How is that even possible?" Sirius asked, as he sat next to Lily's bed, holding her hand.
"I have no idea," Jodie told him. "I still don't understand any of this, but I have no idea where the new pattern came from. It literally just appeared after a massive spike in brain activity."
"I have to admit, I kind of wish I could write a paper on this, though I doubt it'd ever get published," Jim said, as he was reading a medical textbook. "There's so much here that could change our understanding of how the human brain works."
"I once read that humans only use something like ten percent of their brains?" Rufus said. "Is it possible that they're using more?"
"That's just a myth perpetrated by popular media, most recently the John Travolta film Phenomenon," Jim replied. "When people were first starting to understand how the brain worked, it was assumed that we only used ten percent, but in reality, we use one hundred percent of our brains. Twenty percent of our brains keep us breathing and alive whilst we sleep," Jim replied.
"Oh. Well, this proves that I'm not good with medicine," Rufus chuckled, shaking his head.
"Not your fault, you'd be surprised how many people actually believe that we only use ten percent of our brains," Lana said, chuckling.
"Do you have any idea what could be doing this?" Draco asked, standing with his arms crossed across his chest.
"Unfortunately, we don't have any idea. I know your friend is still researching something but there's got to be something we can discover," Jim said.
"If you want to write a paper, Doctor Silsby, I'm sure we can publish it in our world," Rufus said. "This is… never something I ever imagined could happen."
"Likewise," Jim agreed, as he kept reading his book. "I just hope we can find a solution quickly."
"You will," Sirius said. He looked at Lily, gently brushing a strand of hair from her face. "You have to," he added softly. He kissed Lily's hand. "You got this, kiddo. You need to wake up. We need you."
"Okay, not gonna lie, that doesn't exactly sound promising," Lily said, her eyes narrowing. "Either succeed or die?"
"Sounds like a normal day for us," Ginny said, rolling her eyes. "Let's face it, we've faced worse and survived worse."
"If anyone can do this, it's you two," Nagini said.
"Don't count yourself out, Nagini. You're doing brilliantly, and you can do this," Lily smiled encouragingly at her.
"Thank you, Lily. I appreciate that," Nagini smiled back. Lily looked at Dumbledore.
"Before we do, there's more I need to know," Lily said. "I've got a lot of questions."
"And I'll answer as best I can," Dumbledore promised. "It is the least I can do, after everything that has happened, you are fully entitled to answers."
"And I have a lot of questions," Lily said.
"Where would you like to begin?" Dumbledore asked. Lily sighed and took a breath.
"Why didn't you tell us about the Hallows?" Lily asked. Dumbledore looked at her, and Lily could see pain and sorrow in his eyes.
"When I was a young man, I wanted to find the Hallows, to be the Master of Death, and to use them to… to lead the world on the right path, including muggles. I thought that they couldn't be trusted with their own world, given how they were practically ready to go to war. I, and the man I loved, both agreed that we needed to control muggles, for their own good. At least, I thought he agreed. He didn't see things the same way I did, and I followed him because I loved him," Dumbledore explained.
"But he wanted control for a different reason?" Ginny asked, as Nagini's eyes widened.
"I never knew you were in love with him," Nagini said. "Not at first anyway."
"Very few did, and I worked hard to keep it that way. I considered it to be my greatest mistake, given everything that came from it," Dumbledore replied. Lily and Ginny both looked at Nagini.
"Is that why you didn't fight him right away?" Nagini asked. As she finished speaking, Lily and Ginny nodded in understanding, figuring out exactly what Nagini was talking about, or rather, who she was talking about.
"Sadly, yes," Dumbledore confirmed. "When we were younger, he was so… charming, and I loved him completely. He had a way of entrancing me, not with magic, but with his confidence and strength. Before we fought, he met with me at a muggle venue, a rather posh restaurant within a hotel. I told him what he was planning was madness, and he told me that it was what we had planned. He also pointed out that we had planned it together when we were younger. I denied it, but… the truth was, when I was younger, I did think it was the right thing to do, but for the muggle's own good. I ignored the signs showing that he wasn't doing it for the same reasons, because of my love for him, until it cost me everything."
Lily looked at him; it was amazing to hear such things from Dumbledore. It showed a side of him that Lily had never expected to see.
"Cost you everything, sir?" Ginny asked, looking surprised. Dumbledore sighed.
"Lily, do you remember me telling you about my sister?" Dumbledore asked. Lily nodded; she had valued all her conversations with Dumbledore.
"Yeah, that after your mother died, you had to take care of her," Lily replied. "I figured there was more, but we didn't really get the time to talk more about it."
"Unfortunately, there never is enough time," Dumbledore said sadly. "I just… there was more, obviously. The fact is, she died because of me."
"Because of you?" Lily sounded incredulous; there was no way it was possible.
"When I was starting to plan more with Gillert, Aberforth confronted us, and warned me about being foolish. Gillert didn't appreciate that, and there was a fight. It should never have happened, but when it was finished… Ariana was dead, and Gillert fled. I have always blamed myself," Dumbledore explained, a tear in his eye. Lily didn't know how spirits could cry, but she could feel the pain he was feeling. She walked over to him and embraced him in a hug.
"I… I let my youth and foolishness blind me… it cost me my sister," Dumbledore continued, with tears flowing gently.
"I don't think you're the only one who's made that mistake before, Professor," Lily said softly, holding onto him. "Uncle Sirius is still angry with himself for not seeing the truth of what happened the night my parents were killed. He says he should have known Remus was innocent, but he let his anger cloud his mind. I know it's not the same as love, but emotions have a way of controlling all of us."
Dumbledore chuckled softly. "Wise words from a wise woman," Dumbledore complimented. "You are correct; emotions can control any of us. I've seen your emotions, however, guide you into the great woman you are. The same goes for you too, Ginny. Your love is strong, and it helps you fight the darkness within the world."
"Thanks to your guidance," Ginny pointed out. "I still have guilt from listening to Riddle's diary, and I know I shouldn't, but it'll always be there, just like Lily still harbours some guilt from the night Voldemort returned."
"And I still feel the same for the lives I have destroyed whilst under Voldemort's influence," Nagini added.
"We can't change the past, but we can learn from it to make a better future," Lily pointed out.
"I have said it before, and I will say this again. You make me proud, Lily, having been blessed to see you grow into this fine, young woman that you have become," Dumbledore told her. "I am forever thankful to you for your kindness and support."
"You've long since earnt it," Lily told him. "And we've figured out a lot since you died."
"Oh?" Dumbledore asked. Lily took a breath.
"Snape killed you because you wanted him to, didn't he? You knew you would die, and there wasn't a cure for your hand, and it was killing you. Instead of dying painfully, you received a painless death, and Snape was able to keep his cover intact," Lily said. Dumbledore looked at her, his smile returning.
"I am glad that you deduced that truth," Dumbledore admitted. "He was not comfortable with the idea, but he knew it had to be done. The night he was told to come and tell me your parents were going to be killed, he knew he had to protect them. Not for you or your father, but because he loved your mother. You've never seen his Patronus, have you?"
"No, I haven't," Lily admitted, shaking her head.
"It is a silver Doe, like yours, but more importantly, the same as your mother's. It is why he began to change when you began your transition. I believe you reminded him of the child he could have had with Lily, had he not made the mistakes he did," Dumbledore said. Lily's mouth gaped as she looked at Dumbledore, processing everything. It took a few minutes before she could speak again.
"So… he killed you… because you asked him to," Lily said.
"Indeed," Dumbledore confirmed. "It was the only way to ensure that Hogwarts would remain safe after my death. I knew Voldemort would take over the ministry, despite all of Rufus's attempts to stop him. I hoped it wouldn't happen, but…"
"But you always make contingency plans, just in case," Ginny finished. "It's not difficult to understand that. We both figured quite quickly that Snape wasn't an enemy, but we couldn't ask him with just our instincts for proof."
"Indeed. Your wisdom serves you both well," Dumbledore agreed. "Severus is still ensuring that you are kept safe, as much as possible anyway. He genuinely cares about you, more so since you began your transition. You remind him of your mother, and perhaps of what might have been had things been different."
"If my mum had chosen him instead of my dad?" Lily asked. Dumbledore nodded in confirmation. "Yeah, I wonder how different things might be now if that had happened. Would I even have been the girl that lived? Would something else have happened? There's always going to be a what if scenario, I guess."
"There is a muggle theory that says for every major decision that we make, the alternative is played out in a different reality," Dumbledore explained.
"I've seen that view in some muggle tv shows, mostly science fiction shows like Star Trek and Red Dwarf. It'd be interesting if it was real," Lily said. "I wonder how I'd be in a different reality."
"It is difficult to know, but we can only focus on the here and now," Dumbledore said. "And I must apologise to you, Lily. With the benefit of hindsight, I know now that I made your childhood harder than it should have been. Perhaps you shouldn't have been hidden from the magical world, or had magic hidden from you. I thought, at the time, that it was the only thing that made sense, but I do wonder how differently things might have gone had I not insisted upon that."
"Like you said, we can only focus on the here and now," Lily told him. "I was lucky; I was raised by Uncle Sirius, and I was raised by Aunt Minnie, and ever since I started at Hogwarts, I was raised by you. You are a father to me as well, and I'm thankful for that."
Lily, Ginny, and Nagini all saw the tears starting to flow gently from Dumbledore's eyes.
"I am very deeply touched, Lily. You have proven that love and goodness will always be prevalent in this world, and you are the perfect example of what a person should be like; loving, caring, and hopeful for the future," Dumbledore told her. "I am thankful that I can be here to guide you now."
"Before we do move on, did you have a way to destroy the Horcrux?" Lily asked.
"Only one, and I must confess, it was a terrible plan," Dumbledore admitted. "I knew there would come a time when you would face Voldemort, and I felt that if he killed you, it wouldn't actually destroy you, but it would destroy the Horcrux within and protect you. But that was just a theory. However, after the bond between yourself and Ginny formed, breaking the Horcrux fragment, I knew that was no longer an option."
"Which means now, we need to face these trials," Ginny said.
"Do we have to do them alone?" Nagini asked.
"I don't know. I have never known of magic such as this," Dumbledore confessed. "I hope not; you are stronger together than you are apart."
"That's true," Lily agreed. "How are we here anyway? You said it was because of our power?"
"Yes. You wanted to be here, with Nagini, to help protect the world, and so your magical core made it happen. You were not ready for this, however, which is why Hogwarts was so confusing and mixed up. Your minds connected to one another, and so it was trying to stabilise itself. Now you are outside, the castle itself has become the correct grounds for your trials, and so when you enter, you will face the darkness of the Horcrux's, but not unarmed," Dumbledore replied, waving his hand, with each of their wands appearing on the ground in front of them.
Lily took her wand, as did the others, and immediately felt a surge of strength flow through her, like she had been missing an important part of herself.
"What do you mean, weren't ready?" Nagini asked.
"The magic used to get here is an ancient one, and very powerful. Both Lily and Ginny grow more powerful every day, but the power used almost killed them. In the real world, you three are in coma's, being watched over by Sirius, Remus, and others. Once your trials are complete, you will wake up with full knowledge of what has happened here, and you will all be stronger. Nagini, you will now always be connected to Lily and Ginny, not in the manner that they can speak to one another, but you will be stronger when near to them, and you will never return to your snake form," Dumbledore explained. Nagini smiled at Lily and Ginny.
"Then I am thankful to you both," Nagini said, standing up. "Are you coming with us?"
"Sadly, I cannot. I must leave here, but I will always be watching over you," Dumbledore said. "I love you all, and I am thankful to have known you."
Ginny and Lily got up as Dumbledore did, and walked to him, embracing him in a hug.
"We love you too. Thank you, for always being here," Lily said softly.
"It has been my greatest pleasure. May the great spirits of old watch over you, and may you find the strength inside to defeat any enemy. We will see each other again, and when your time is finally here to join me, many years from now, I will be happy to hear all of your stories," Dumbledore said. He turned and began to walk away, and as he did, the sun shone down on him as he disappeared, turning into small balls of light before floating into the sky. Lily watched him vanish, then looked at the others.
"Alright, so we know what we need to do," Lily said. "Let's go and destroy these damned Horcrux fragments, and then Voldemort will know what it's like to have a really bad day."
As the three of them walked back to the castle, Lily felt stronger, and more confident, and knew that whatever happened, they'd face the darkness together, and win.