Breaks:
[L1,2 or 3] represents the beginning of a flashback to one of Elena's past lives. There is more than one past life, which is why I have put up the numbers. Though, these memories are usually told as she sleeps and Elena herself cannot remember them.
[/L1,2 or 3] represents the end of a flashback to one of Elena's past lives.
[P] represents the beginning of a retelling of a memory in Elena's current life.
[/P] represents the end of a retelling of a memory in Elena's current life.
~3~ is just a time skip
AN: Enjoy the story!
I stumbled upon exiting my portal into one of the many root tunnels under the folded mountain. From beside me Yugo let out a gasp. With our hands still clasped and our bodies both exhausted I ended up bringing us both down.
I'd twisted on the way down, partly yanked to one side when Yugo had attempted to pull me up. Then I landed on my side painfully and ended up jerking Yugo over to his side too. We both groaned at the impact with the ground but didn't bother to do much else.
At my back was the entrance to the tunnel. Rain still poured outside, it's steady beat like a drum that echoed into the cave. The lightning that had been so incessant before had somewhat calmed. My guess- the worst of the storm had passed us by.
Exhausted, I simply let myself breathe as the pain in my side slowly faded away. Tiredly I watched how my shadow would be cast further down the tunnel behind Yugo with each flash of lightning that lit up the outside. The thunder that followed sounded like low rumbles which wasn't even felt in the tunnel.
"Are you okay?"
Blinking, my vision refocused from my shadow to Yugo in front of me. His brow was furrowed, breath just as deep as my own with his exhaustion. Azure eyes searched as he held my gaze.
All at once everything seemed to slam into me.
How the village had nearly been destroyed. How the Summit Tree is destroyed. How the travelers were all nearly killed. How I'd been threatened to a death by fire. How close I'd gotten to actually dying by fire. How Yugo had come to find me and worked together with me. How sore I was from it all.
The tears that gathered in my eyes burned. "N... not really..." I uttered to him as I started to hiccup. "Th- this is a- a bad d- da- ay."
Yugo's brows shot up. He blinked at me. Softly, "...just a bad day?" He sounded incredulous at that.
"...a r- real- ally bad d- day...!" I amended.
I'm not sure what I expected, but Yugo suddenly stifling a laugh was not it. Irritation and anger suddenly filled me, even as some part of me found the sound he made appealing.
"H- hey!" I tried to growl at him through my tears, "i- it's n- n- not- t funny!"
When he only tried to cover his mouth and didn't stop his laughing, I shoved his shoulder lightly and gave another growl. Yugo shook his head, laughing harder for some reason as the force of my push nearly rolled him onto his back. With a wet huff I turned over on my back and did my best to ignore him.
Staring up at the ceiling, my anger quickly dissipated. Only plain sadness was left. I pushed my mask up so it rested on my forehead and rubbed at my burning eyes. It hurt. Sniffles forced their way out of my system.
"S- sorry, 'Lena..!" Yugo giggled, calming, "you're r- right, it's n- not funny..!"
I only bothered to give him a growl of disapproval.
Finally his laughter died away. Out of the corner of my eye I saw him fold his free arm under his head like it was a pillow. The grin he had dimmed but his azure eyes stayed bright.
"Okay, I'm done... Please, forgive me?"
Petulantly, "no." I answered. He let out a sad noise that hurt to hear but I stayed steadfast and ignored him.
I did have a bad day. Am having a bad day. I'm pretty sure it's at least past time for lunch if it wasn't the end of the morning already. With the sun hidden it was difficult to tell for sure. Then again, with how bone tired I was, I could easily fall back asleep to the sound of the rain. With Yugo beside me I was even more soothed than usual- despite my current annoyance at him. Sleep was certainly a possibility and a greatly appealing one.
"Common, 'Lena, pleaaase?" Begged the one I was trying to ignore. "No more laughing, promise!"
All I gave was a shake of my head in answer. Once again he made that same sad noise that was a cross between a whine and genuine hurt.
"What can I do to make it up to you?"
That got me to finally look over at him. Yugo's eyes were wide with hope, his head lifted off his arm the moment he noticed he'd had my attention. He was serious. He wanted to do something to make up for a wrong. I couldn't quite believe it. I'd only seen Moon do something like that before towards me. Somehow it made a warm feeling grow in my chest all the while the tears that had somewhat slowed now regained tenacity.
Instantly I knew what I wanted. I'd let go of his hand to reach out for him in tentative invitation. "Hug..?"
There was no hesitation. I'd barely said the word before Yugo moved closer. He wrapped one arm around my waist and the other I lifted my head for so it could slide around to the back of my neck. I mirrored the position, with my arm sliding under his to wrap around to his shoulder blades instead of his neck.
Gently my mask was tugged on and I let him pull it the rest of the way off so it wouldn't be in the way. My forehead rested against his chest while I felt the weight of his head on top of my own. A gentle clatter came from the floor somewhere above our heads, where Yugo had presumably set the wooden mask down before he returned his arm to my waist.
Everything else in my environment, but Yugo, seemed to fade away as unimportant. As my senses were soothed my mind wandered to the chaos that had happened and what it could all mean.
There was no longer a place for me to stay with Moon. With the Summit Tree gone, so too was my safe place.
Sure I could stay in the tunnels when it rained, but Moon didn't like them, I couldn't see the stars, and the villagers could easily find their way in here.
When it didn't rain I could perhaps find different trees to stay in across the island but there were only so many that were perfectly suited for napping, not to mention how easily the villagers could find me while I slept. If I found a place up the mountain then Moon wouldn't join me, not wanting to stay long with others of his kind so nearby.
Either way I'd always be on the move and I'd have to find a new place to reside every night.
My heart hurt even more. I didn't want to do that. Not on my own.
On top of it all, after what Colorless said, I was sure that I'd eventually be hunted too- if not right away, then whenever Botan passed so the Shaman couldn't stop them. It simply wouldn't be safe here anymore. If I didn't leave with Yugo and the others, I'd have to find another way off the island eventually. It was a terrifying prospect.
"What happened?" Yugo asked quietly, "first inside with the fire then-" a short growl left him, "you got pinned...?!"
Our hug tightened at the reminder. That anger Yugo had before came back and stoked my own. It was odd. Anyone else and I wouldn't stay in the same room as them, let alone stay so close to allow a hug. Despite his anger, I didn't feel any need to run.
"How did-?" I questioned lightly, too curious not to ask, though uncertain how to go about it.
"...your portal disappeared and the branch it should have severed hit me. When I looked for you... I saw the light from your portal, and how someone-"
Yugo took in a hard breath and his grip around me tightened. Somehow the action was both reassuring and comforting. When he let the breath go again, he relaxed. Then I winced in surprise more than anything when I felt a stinging pain flare along my neck.
"Sorry," Yugo said quickly and I let out a hiss of air between my teeth. The arm I had around his ribs was retracted so I could feel my neck myself. It was wet and warm and slightly sticky- I recognized the feel of it as blood almost instantly. Colorless had cut me with his spear and I hadn't even noticed until Yugo had touched it.
Gently my arm went around his waist again, conscious of his ribs this time. "Yugo-" I started, paused. Only one word really came to mind, "sorry...!"
"Wh..? What are you saying, 'Lena?" He sounded quite lost as he said this, which only had my sudden guilt rise more. "There's no reason for you to be sorry."
Eyes closed, "I got you hurt." I managed to get out softly. The fact alone hurt to acknowledge.
"Don't...!"
Involuntary, I flinched at the utter offense I heard in his tone mixed with the start of a heated anger. Then an apologetic noise that bordered on hurt left him, which had me pause.
"Sorry..." Yugo stated. Not only was his voice softer than before but there had been no expected annoyance added to his tone. Just hurt. A little strained, "please... don't apologize for that... especially when it was out of your control. If you hadn't freed yourself when you did... that landslide would have been the least of their problems."
Stunned, I took a moment to absorb what he'd said. There was absolutely no malicious intent in his words, just genuine honesty.
If I hadn't gotten away from Colorless... would Yugo have... fought him? What about any other villager that tried to keep me? The thought that he... he just... cared... it had my chest burn with warmth and disbelief. Someone... would fight... for me?
[P]
Tongue stuck out of the side of my mouth, I carefully wrapped the stem of the flower I held with another. Gently I twisted the long stems so they wouldn't break and reached for the next flower to add to this flower chain. My hand touched the grass, blades tickled my fingers, but no flowers met my hand. With a blink of confusion, I looked over.
The pile of flowers that I had spent a while collecting was no longer beside me. Curiously, I glanced around for them. First looking towards the gobbals who grazed beyond their fence- knowing that I had made sure to sit far enough away that they couldn't reach my flowers but needing to check again all the same- but none of the fluffy white creatures were anywhere near the fence I sat by let alone interested in what I had. They walked and grazed away, ignoring everything but their task of eating. On I searched... and my gaze landed on a group of five village children not a few paces away.
They hadn't been here a few minutes ago, when I'd first sat down.
Like all children they wore the colorless carving-less masks that were given until apprenticeships started. Everyone in the village wore the grass skirts, but females wore a shawl of leaves over our shoulders which was long enough to tie below our ribs. This was part of why mothers carried their child on their backs until they were old enough to not confuse another parent with their own.
My stomach squirmed at the sight of the group, uneasiness instantly replacing any calm that I had found in my task of creating a flower crown. I watched wearily as they huddled together, whispering loudly to one another, all the while facing me. Their eyes felt cold, as they usually did when set upon me, and their hands were held behind their backs suspiciously. My eyes zeroed in on the action and I felt my heart sink down to my gut.
It wouldn't be the first time things had been taken from me. Apparently this would be far from the last time too. Which meant...
I'd have to speak to them.
Just the thought of doing so had me tense. Already my mind came up with all the responses that I could get just for speaking to them. I didn't want to talk to them. But I wanted to finish my flower chain even more. So I mustered up my courage and spoke up.
"...do you know where my flowers went?" I questioned them, instantly feeling my heart begin to race in my chest with enough force that it hurt. My stomach squirmed and my body began to lightly tremble as I anxiously waited for the response from them. Silently I marveled at my own bravery for speaking at all- all the while berating myself for actually following through with it.
My plan for the day had been simple; don't play with the others, don't even talk to them. Just keep to myself. A full proof plan to keep myself from getting hurt. Because playing with the others hurt- in one form or another.
Yet here I was breaking my own rule meant to keep me safe.
I braced myself.
"Why would we know where your plucked flowers went?" One of the girls of the group replied, words spat out like she had better things to do than speak to me.
Another girl gave a light giggle that had my skin prickle with dislike. "Yeah, why would we know defect?"
"They probably went and withered to nothingness to avoid her freaky-ness." Mentioned the third girl to her friends with a tilt of her head in my direction, as though I wasn't even there to hear for myself.
Already regretting my decision to speak to them, I decided that I would push aside the fact that they had taken the flowers from me. While I didn't exactly want to go through the extra effort of gathering more, it would be a lot less of a hassle and far less hurtful. So I heaved myself up onto my feet, feeling heavy with invisible wounds, and began to painstakingly scour the area for the few flowers that grew here. Adults made it their mission to provide soft quality grass for the gobbals to gobble up, which meant no tough flowers or even weeds that grew flowers.
"-right Odium?"
At the sound of his name from the one of the girls, I nearly stopped. Odium was the name of a boy a few seasons younger than me. While he seemed to get along with the others fine, what I found oddest about him was how he tended to stare. He always stared.
Carefully I looked over, trying to pretend that I was distracted by what I was doing and not paying attention to what they were doing. Sure enough there stood a boy, mask turned fully towards me as I moved about. I fought the shiver that went down my spine at the stare.
And they called me creepy.
I could only wonder what he was staring for. Was he waiting for a moment when my hat would fall off? Try and see underneath and determine if the whispers others had about horns and other strange things were true or not? Or was he trying to figure out why my skin was so white in comparison to the dark brown tones all the villagers had? I wondered about that plenty and it never got me anywhere- yet that Odium kept on staring.
Since the staring started I'd observed how Odium didn't exactly participate in pranks. Sometimes he'd even make sure I was looking before he put a stolen item of mine down somewhere hidden when the other children were distracted.
I'd tried to ask about it. Why he'd bother when everyone else was so set on being mean. I found his behavior was weird and abnormal. Each time I tried to ask he'd never speak to me. Even tended to run away each time I tried to ask him why he was being so weird. The one time I'd asked him in front of others he'd yelled at me until I had to run to get away from how awful and hurt I felt from the venomous words. That's when I understood that he was trying to keep his staring and occasional oddly-kind actions as a secret.
"..right..!" Odium jumped at the sound of his name.
"Great!" The first girl who had spoken stepped forward and pushed him towards me. "Go right ahead then!"
"What!?" He yelped and I forgot all about being discrete in my spying, not that the group would really care anyhow by now.
In one hand I held my flower chain a little tighter, worried it might be snatched. My other gripped the two flowers I'd just absently plucked. I narrowed my eyes at Odium as the only other boy stepped back from whispering something in his ear.
"Oh... right." Almost reluctantly, Odium came closer. I stayed where I was, tense, and watched as he came to a stop an arms length away. He pointed to the forest on the east side of the village. In a volume only I could hear, "there's a flower field... if you walk that way for a while... through the forest."
Caught off guard, I stared. Behind Odium the other children were giggling together as though they'd shared a good joke. Trepidation grew in my gut. I couldn't tell if I should believe Odium's words or not. Was this him playing a prank on me with the others, or was he genuine about the flower field? This wasn't another moment with him trying to be secretly nice was it? I couldn't really tell.
"Okay..?" I questioned uncertainly after a short bout of silence between us.
"Well?!" One of the girls shouted and Odium jumped again.
"T- they're really pretty too..! You should... you should go." He said back to me, trembling a little, but still in a quiet voice.
Once more I looked to where he pointed. All children were warned to not stray far into the forest, told of the animals that lived nearby which would be more than happy to devour misbehaving children.
I looked back to him. Incredulous, "no thanks."
But he shook his head, "you should go. Just be back before nightfall..." as he spoke I jumped as something slimy and soft appeared in my hands. The flowers were gone, replaced instead with mushy dead plants that left a stinky green slime behind on my skin. Grossed out, I flicked my hands of the substance and watched as the flowers and my flower chain- which I'd just spent the better part my day creating- fell in a gloppy heap on the grass.
With a glare, I looked to Odium- took in his guilty posture- then looked behind him to the giggling group of children. I gave a sigh and looked around for more flowers- only to cringe at all the goopy remains left about in clumps all over the area.
"Look!" Cried one of the girls loudly, "the defect's killed all the flowers just by being near them!"
"Monster!" The other four yelled, sounding genuinely scared. Instantly my heart felt heavy and something switched between hot and cold in my stomach making me feel queasy. Tensely I watched as they all crouched, hands to the grass.
"Odium's gonna be next!" One of the girls cried, "get away from him!"
At once brambles began to sprout from the earth, tiny plants no thicker than a finger and every inch filled with thorns. The plants sprang forth towards me and I jumped back quickly to avoid them, but still got my ankles painfully scraped at.
"Away! Away!" The group cried together and Odium stood very still as the plants went around him to get to me.
Quickly I turned and ran towards the forest. They chased me all the way to the treeline. Only when I couldn't hear their howling laughter anymore did I slow to a walk. My breathing hitched and stuttered but not because I felt tired.
Abruptly I stopped. Spied a loose stone on the ground through my blurred vision. Suddenly very angry, I whipped down and plucked it from the ground, nearly dropping it in my haste. Then I drew up an arm and hurled that stone as hard as I could.
It hit the trunk of a tree with a thump, bounced off it. I felt my heart trip over itself the moment I noticed it head back my way but I couldn't move fast enough. In an instant it hit my knee and I crumpled to the forest floor with a yelp.
"Stupid...!" I hissed as tears streamed down my face, making my skin itch. With a growl I picked up the stone again- aimed carefully this time- and threw it far away. It landed with a satisfying thunk in the dirt... a satisfaction that lasted all of a few seconds. I was still angry. Still sad.
Very much still hurt.
Carefully I moved off my knees to sit instead. My knee stung at the movement and I held it tight with both hands. Even slower, I moved until my back was against a tree.
"Stupid..." I hiccuped, wiped my chin with my wrist where tears had pooled. Eyes closed I drew up my knees and hugged them to my chest.
It didn't even matter anymore if there were flowers or not. I just wanted the hurt to stop. My mind went to my hat, the glowing antler-like structure hidden underneath, the whiteness of my skin, the frustrating and ever present fact that I couldn't speak to the plants... why was I so different? What was wrong with me?
Looks the adults and children alike gave me flashed across my mind.
I shivered at how cold they were, how they seemed to pierce straight through me. Whispered words they said too loudly were blocked out from my memory but the intent, the hate, the genuine loathing directed right at me... it tore at something inside.
A cold numb feeling began at my chest, crawled across my body like an army of marching ants. I curled up tight to myself, careful not to touch my injured knee. Tried to loose myself in that numbness where everything around me didn't hurt quite so much.
Why couldn't I be just like everyone else?
[/P]
Something inside seemed to whisper no way. No way was he saying that he would have done anything to them. Not for me. That just... wasn't possible.
But what else could he mean?
I couldn't come up with anything, even after contemplating it. There was nothing that Yugo could gain from doing such a thing, except getting himself hurt if he wasn't careful. That's when I realized that this wasn't the first time that Yugo showed evidence of caring without wanting to gain anything. After all, with his actions, over and over... he showed it. Even now, he gave me a warm hug and asked how I felt.
...I couldn't understand. Why? Why would he...?
The line of thought simply shook me to my core. Within my past... the only one I could possibly compare to for such actions... was Moon.
Moon who had found me in the forest. Took me to live at the Summit Tree with him. Taught me what was safe to eat and what wasn't. Kept me safe from being eaten. All without wanting anything. I gave him my companionship.
Unlike with Moon though... I could get an answer for this question from Yugo. Instantly nerves built up in my stomach, making me queasy. I'm not sure if I would like the answer that I received. But my curiosity burned away at my hesitance as though it were dry wood to the fire. I had to know.
So, "why...?" I uttered, unable to hide anything in that moment. I felt so raw. I needed to know.
(Suspiciously enough that hurt undead thing that had been following me around suddenly felt as though it paid close attention. Like Yugo's answer would determine if I was weak enough for it to attack. If it did... I don't think I'd be able to find the strength to push it away.)
"Because," the word itself sounded like a plea, "you matter to me. I don't like it when people who matter to me are hurt. I especially don't want someone who matters to me to be treated badly."
Everything was too hot all at once. My tears wouldn't stop falling. All I could do was close my too hot eyes and hold him tighter. This hurt, but it was also nice. It felt really, really, nice. His words seemed to echo in my head like a pleasant tune that needed to be sung.
I matter to him.
"Elena, you... you're one of the most selfless people I've ever met. Since I've met you, all I've seen you do... is help. And try your best to help even when you're unsure and scared." Yugo then admitted, returning my tight hold with just as much emotion. "It's pretty... terrifying... but I admire that about you all the same."
I'd never heard anything quite like this before either. I was both terrifying and admirable? As for selfless... I wasn't so sure on that either. I'd almost let Botan be, let him die on the mountain. I did leave Yugo and the others behind to the mercy of the villagers. Had been tempted to not help and leave them as they were... and while that did damper some of the warm feelings Yugo's words gave me... I was just... happy.
Something inside seemed to sing, another confirmation that Yugo is safe.
Somehow, "...thankyou..." I managed to work out past that lump in my throat. The hug made it easier, like something icy inside was steadily being thawed.
With my head tucked under him it was easier to simply focus on what I felt in the moment. That gentle rhythmic thud Yugo's heart made near my ear. Each slow breath that filled his lungs. How his body subtly rose and fell with each one taken. The soft way in which Yugo's hands now moved to pet me, one on my upper back while the other was on the back of my neck where it slowly got tangled within my hair. And the light masculine scent that is Yugo which completely surrounded me.
A contented breath left him. His hold was secure as though there to keep me together. We stayed like that for a few moments and I soon realized that he wouldn't let go until I was ready for him to. While immensely reassuring and calming... I couldn't help the worry that popped up in the back of my mind.
I... there wasn't anything I could do to loose this was there? His comfort and safety that were so freely given. What were the conditions? I didn't want to ever loose this. I'd do... what would I do to keep this?
Careful to not injure him further, I held him tighter.
"Elena..." Yugo spoke softly but he couldn't hide the anger that underlied his tone. His words came slow, as though Yugo were forming his sentence as the words left his mouth. "Why did that guy pin you to begin with? What... what motivation...?" He stopped. Nearly growled, "injured you too..!"
At the question, I tensed. Reminded of the words Colorless spat at me. Yugo was already too angry to even finish his question properly.
With that in mind, "he... he thought that I started the fire..." I answered quietly, voice muffled somewhat from our position.
The instant I stopped speaking, I felt him tense. I got a strong feeling that if I hadn't already had him in a hug, Yugo would have summoned a portal and I wouldn't have seen him for a while. A true growl left him which resonated through us both and echoed down the root tunnel ominously.
I surprised myself- somehow, I still didn't feel the least bit scared.
"I made sure he knew that I was saving the village, not trying to destroy it." I told Yugo then with my volume only a little louder than before to make sure Yugo heard me.
As I spoke my grip tightened on him somewhat, determined to keep him here. Even if I was acting on a strong hunch, this really wasn't a time that I wanted to be left alone anyways. Yugo's presence always provided me with the best comfort and his hugs were magical with how they always managed to calm me. I could only hope my hug could provide something similar for him.
It took a bit before Yugo finally calmed completely. He'd hugged me back tightly, nearly to the point of it being crushing, before his grip gradually loosened. Only then did I slowly pull back. Disengage. Yugo's eyes were tired, a reflection of the rest of his posture. I took in his expression carefully and made sure to memorize it. This was a tired but calm Yugo.
"Alright." He stated, and I wasn't sure if it was to end the questions or start a new topic. It might have been used for both though as Yugo continued after a moment, "we should probably go find the others."
My body instantly rejected the idea. Even with the hard ground under me, all my body wanted was to stay where it was and rest after the ordeal I'd just been through. With how tired I saw Yugo was I got the feeling that it might not be very difficult to persuade him into taking an afternoon nap with me right where we were. It was very tempting.
However I couldn't just push back how I was also worried about the others. I wanted to check them for any injuries they might have sustained from the fire. In fact, I needed to attend to any injuries Yugo had gotten as well.
A chill crept through me as a cold draft came in through the mouth of the tunnel. Somehow it felt piercingly cold now, compared to how it felt before when it had passed over Yugo and I while we shared a hug.
I shook my head at Yugo even as I pushed my protesting-self up by my elbows into a seated position. Once I was stable I rubbed at my sore eyes with my wrist, "I want to take a look at you first. Can you lift up your tunic?"
Yugo made a startled noise as he suddenly sat up alarmingly quickly, the fast movement making him wince and hold his ribs with a hand. With his face turned to me the light from behind me allowed me to see quite clearly just how wide his eyes were. "Wh- what?!"
"You... you're hurt aren't you?" I questioned him even as I eyed him oddly. Slowly I gestured to the ribs he still held, as though if I moved any faster he might act weirdly again. "I can do something about it for you...?"
There was a pause. He glanced down to the hand he had over his ribs quickly before meeting my gaze for a second time.
"O- oh-!" As I watched, red spread out over his face. "Yeah..!" Abruptly he cleared his throat of the high note his voice had taken. Shuffled nervously. In a voice that was closer to normal, "I... right! Yes. I did. I am- injury." Yugo was nodding his head as he spoke rather haltingly. He was looking somewhere to my left in avoidance of eye contact. "...yes."
My stare remained the same as I tried to figure out what was wrong while I waited but when Yugo didn't turn to let me look at his ribs or even move to lift his tunic my confusion only grew.
Slowly, "...are you okay?" I asked of him at length. Yugo jumped at the sound of my voice as though he hadn't expected it.
Leaned forward on my hand, I tilted my head as I observed him critically. Now that I thought about it, this behavior seemed rather familiar. He'd used a high tone like that just last night. What had Ruel called it-? Nerves? Was Yugo nervous about something? His body movements told me he was uncomfortable about something... did his injury hurt more than he wanted to say now that I had drawn attention to it?
Eyes went right back to being wide at my question. "Yesofcourse!" Yugo melded his words and I tried to decipher his sentence. Then, "I mean- my ribs hurt-! But that..! It's not-! I thought- but then...!" I must have had a funny look on my face now because he broke out into a short laughter that certainly sounded nervous enough. He waved his hands as though to stop something from approaching. "I'mfineI'mfine!"
Concerned, I tried to levitate any fears he might have, "I don't think what I do hurts- at least, no one said that it has? But I promise to be extra gentle and careful with you."
Head already shaking in denial, "you're fine-! I'm fine! It'sfine-!" Yugo spouted even as he finally turned to give me his back. Tunic rolled up to his shoulder blades. He then hunched forwards to put his head in his hands- and instantly seemed to regret it. Now he sat up properly, impossibly stiff.
Immediately my eyes were drawn to the dark purple and green bruises that had started to form across Yugo's left side. Admittedly, it looked quite painful.
"You're not fine." I admonished him as I moved to sit behind him properly, "don't lie about that- I can see it. I promise to be gentle, so tell me where it hurts most, okay?"
He gave a tentative nod of his head, "o- okay," and I hovered my palms over his back.
Oddly enough, my palms quickly grew hot with my skin only inches away from his even though I hadn't summoned any magic yet. I paused there, simply feeling that strange warmth. It seemed to cover my hands and crawl up to my wrists, making the rest of me feel cold in comparison.
Abruptly I was hit with the desire to give him a hug from behind. Not only was I certain that I would warm right up the moment that I did so but I also already knew just how much I liked his hugs.
As though something else had taken control of me, I moved forward- and suddenly realized that I was actually moving and not just thinking about it. Stopping immediately, I blinked, confused. Did... did I just move unconsciously...? Sorta like how sometimes I jump out of the way before I even realized an attack had been aimed at me? But... why would I do that now? This wasn't an incident where I could be hurt nor one where I needed to move without thinking.
The steady drum of rain was suddenly noticed again, along with the occasional flash of light that lit up the root tunnel around us. My desire to give Yugo a hug was still there, it just wasn't as overwhelming as it had been a moment ago.
Shaking my head out of the odd trance that I had been in, I refocused... and realized that Yugo's magic was already there under my palms, that my own magic was already in my palms. Then he leaned back and relaxed into my touch. I could only stare at the backs of my hands, perplexed.
With Dally and Evangeline, their magic... it was practically hostile towards mine, ready to defend, push away if needed. Their magic wanted only to know why mine was so close and to be left alone once it determined my magic wasn't a threat.
Yet with Yugo... his magic was warm and familiar and friendly. It pulled at mine gently, coaxed it forth invitingly. The sensation was nearly ticklish and entirely soothing. Once again I found that I wanted nothing more than to give him a hug. Why hadn't I noticed before, how our magic reacted to one another? Was I simply not paying attention as I am now?
A sharp hiss left through Yugo's teeth, and I froze. My palms were over his back ribs, just under his shoulder blades.
"I- it hurts there..." Yugo got out roughly, took off some of the weight he'd leaned into me with but not enough for us to no longer touch.
Just as he said it I could feel how his magic gathered, how it practically lit up the area that hurt most. Gently I pressed into his ribs guided them down and back into place. Slowly and precisely I moved down his back, aligning his one side to mirror the other.
Yugo tensed then relaxed completely. A great sigh of relief.
When I was done I kept my hands still, closed my eyes as I concentrated my magic. A fluttery feeling kicked up in my gut as his magic met mine again. It was still welcoming and calming and oh so familiar... I felt as though... as though I'd just found something that I hadn't known I'd been searching for... this was something natural and right. As though I'd used my magic on Yugo hundreds of times over befo-
"It's you guys who are making that noise?!"
Startled, I jolted back, eyes snapped open. At some point I had leaned my head against the back of his. He'd leaned back against me with just as much weight. In front of us were Ruel and Dally.
I stared, flummoxed, at how the sword Rubilax was up in the air by Dally's head with the blade black and a molten red. It gave off heat from the light that swirled from between cracks of the blade. The brightness of it felt abrupt to my eyes, after only having the piddly amount of light from outside the tunnel to see by.
Both of their mouths were open as they stared at us, Dally seemingly frozen while pointing. That amused look I'd seen Evangeline wear so many times seemed to come to Ruel as he recovered first and gave a slow grin.
"What were you two doing? Hmm?" Ruel questioned in a tone that suggested he already had an idea in mind.
Suddenly Yugo was up on his feet, tunic falling back into place. For a second I thought that there were no more bruises left whatsoever on his skin. I dismissed the idea as quickly as it came, there was no way he'd have healed so quickly. Then I was distracted by how cold I suddenly was. Goosebumps rose my flesh. I rubbed my arms in defiance against the cold, feeling confused and a little dazed.
"Nothing!" Yugo yelped, "it's not what it looks like!"
"And... what does it look like, Yugo?" Ruel rose an eyebrow as he spoke, but that glimmer of amusement in his eyes only seemed to grow.
"Ah- um- uh-" Yugo rocked on his feet. Shadows cast by Rubilax kept most of him unseen but it was unmistakable how he looked between the three of us, azure eyes wide and pleading for help.
"Never mind that you were embracing!" Dally suddenly cut in, "since when do you purr Yugo?!"
"Huh?" We both blinked, looked to Dally with furrowed brows.
"Embracing?" I questioned the red head, tilted my head curiously.
"My dear Elena," Ruel began, lifted a finger to point upwards, "an embrace is being in a warm and comfortable position- specifically while holding someone close in your arms."
"We weren't though!" Yugo shook his head rapidly, voice high with nerves again, and I could see just how red his skin had turned. The shadows that attempted to swallow him only seemed to make the color more obvious.
Something in me instantly felt hurt though. Sadly, "Oh..." I stated as I looked to him with a frown, "you... weren't comfortable..?"
Eyes widened even more, Yugo opened his mouth but no words came out. Instead he shook his head even more violently as he made sounds that might have been attempts at words. I couldn't watch more than a few seconds before the hurt became too much.
"Okay..." I stated quietly to my hands.
"What Yugo means to say is that he did like the embrace." Rule interrupted after clearing his throat. I glanced up to the old one just as he seemed to look over at me with a smile that felt warm. The glow from the sword that illuminated him seemed to get captured in his eyes, made them shine merrily. "He's just being bashful, Elena dear, don't take it to heart."
"Bashful..." I repeated, glanced over to Yugo. His form was hunched somewhat, face further hidden in his hands. A high whine-like noise left him. It sounded as though he wanted something, though I was unsure as to what.
"Ruel! How are you not concerned about that noise we heard just now?! I've never heard of any race that could do that!" Dally protested, then pointed Rubilax at Yugo.
Yugo jumped back, ears of his hat standing up straight as he hands flew out wide in his alarm. He stared intently at the owner of the red and black blade held just under his chin. Red and white colors of the blade now danced across his skin, cast strange shadows across his person and put Ruel and I in near darkness.
My own alarm at the abrupt action slowly faded when Dally only gave Yugo a glare, "and you! By denying the truth you've hurt Elena! How do you plan to amend for your actions?!"
Azure blue eyes flicked over to me and met my gaze. They widened and Yugo made a sound that said he was hurting too. His back hit the wall behind him with a thud. He dropped his chin to his collar and hid his eyes from my view.
"...sorry, 'Lena." Yugo said softly as the ears of his hat fell back until they were barely seen. "I didn't mean to hurt you."
Dally looked over to me at that, only half of his face visible in the light of his sword but it was enough to see his raised brow. He waited and I got the distinct feeling that he wanted to know my thoughts about all this.
Firstly I was confused and also stunned that Dally would point his sword at Yugo because... because he thought Yugo hurt me. That made my chest warm with an unexpected pleasantness. It was a subdued emotion though, eclipsed nearly entirely by how troubled I was.
That hurt was still there, stinging against my heart like the sting of a thousand bees. Bashful was... not liking something and being a mix of nervous and scared about that something but sometimes reluctantly doing that something anyways when it feels like there's no other choice. Miji would tell me not to act bashful about asking the other children to play games with me after all. Which meant, if Yugo was bashful... he was scared and nervous for sure... and he could have let me hug him because he felt as though there was no other choice.
A familiar numbing sort of cold started to spread through me at the conclusion. The last thing I wanted... was to make Yugo scared and nervous. Just now I had thought we were quite comfortable and warm, just as Ruel stated. But if Yugo didn't agree... and he didn't mean to hurt me... would he have not said that he felt scared and nervous if Ruel and Dally didn't tell me? He'd have kept quiet and let me make him feel that way? Somehow that just hurt even more. Ice grew in my stomach. I'd hurt him without even knowing it?
I couldn't look at him. "No," I answered, shook my head. Something inside hurt, like I was being shredded with claws. It hurt really, really bad.
My voice didn't want to work.
Somehow, I forced it out anyways, "I'm sorry Yugo... it won't... happen again."
I wasn't even sure how I'd be able to keep that promise. Not after feeling how our magic seemed to call to one another just now, whether we were aware of it or not. Worst of all, despite knowing that it made him scared and nervous, I still had the desire to hug him again, to generally be close to him. Desperately I shoved that feeling down, now knowing it was wrong no matter how comfortable and warm it had made me feel at the time. Because... he didn't feel the same.
Feeling sick, I pushed myself up to my feet, grabbed my mask while I was at it.
"Yugo!" Dally practically growled. Out of the corner of my eye I saw how Yugo flinched but couldn't bring myself to do anymore than simply tie the mask back around my head. Blankly I pulled my hands away and stared at how no blood came away from the cut on my neck. I ran my fingers over the area... and couldn't find any injury. "Man up and state your feelings clearly!"
Ruel burst out laughing at that, "you hear that Yugo? Usually I'd advise you not to listen to a Iop but I've never heard more sound advice when it comes to matters of the heart!"
Utterly confused by the two of them, I turned my attention away, instead looked around for Amalia and Evangeline. I felt myself frown when I didn't see them and concern began to push against the numb icy feeling in me, not making the numb cold go away but simply forcefully making room for itself.
"Elena-" Yugo started, but at the sound of his voice something fierce welled up in me, demanding that I protect myself now or risk getting hurt beyond anything I'd ever been before.
I didn't want to hear what he had to say.
"Where are Evangeline and Amalia?" I questioned instead, cutting Yugo off and keeping him out of my line of sight. "Are they okay?"
"We were searching for them when we stumbled across you two." Dally informed as he slung Rubilax over his shoulder before quickly regretting the action and holding the blade well away from his skin. "They shouldn't be too far but I don't want my Eva worrying about me, so we'd better hurry to find them. Do either of you have an idea of where they could be?"
"Well..." I thought about the placement of the bramble ball Amalia and Evangeline had been in compared to the tunnel we were in now. "If they went inside the nearest tunnel they could reach, they should be about... over there." I pointed to my left and slightly up, considering the slope of the land near the folded mountain.
"Your days of worry will cease at last! Here I come Evangeline!" Dally stated as he immediately took off back down the tunnel. With him went the light of his sword and I was quickly plunged into darkness with Yugo and Ruel.
"Get back here, Iop! We don't need to go loosing you in this maze too!" Ruel called out after Dally mere moments before the red head took a tumble. He landed hard on his stomach, and a pained grunt echoed down the tunnels.
"That's what you get," Ruel huffed as he entered the circle of light and stopped at Dally's side to look down on him. "Now stop running. We'll find the rest of the girls in due time."
Dally gave a whine but stood up and didn't immediately run off this time, "I suppose I can slow my pace enough for the elderly to keep up..."
"I'll have you know, I am still very fit for an Enutrof of my age." Ruel snipped, tone filled with agitation.
"You're right, Ruel! I've never seen any other your age wield a shovel as though it were a great sword!" Dally laughed cheerfully as he lead the way again, at a walk this time.
I followed along a few paces behind them, just outside where the light could reach. Took in the different plants that grew here as I passed them, how they didn't seem to glow at all under Rubilax's warm orange light.
The fabric ears of my hat fell back as I felt Yugo close the distance between us. Then he was at my side. Usually I wouldn't have minded. Welcomed his calming presence even. That icy numb feeling was still in my gut though and I didn't want to have anything to do with him at the moment. I did my best to ignore the strained silence between us and let Dally and Ruel's conversation fill the air instead.
It wasn't working well. Something in me rebelled at the idea of ignoring him.
"Elena..." Yugo spoke quietly, his voice only heard over the idle chatter of Dally and Ruel due to his proximity to me. Immediately I felt myself tense, the sick feeling in my gut making my stomach churn. I wanted to get away... but even if I could make myself abandon the search for Amalia and Evangeline I knew there was no where for me to go.
"Elena-" he took my hand and I flinched at the unexpected contact.
Instantly I tried to pull away, but he didn't let me. Both his hands on mine, he tugged back. We came to a stop and I finally turned to face him. I was ready the snarl and make him let me go- but in the instant I met his eyes I wished that I hadn't. Any and all fight left me at what I saw there. They screamed of sadness and hurt and regret. It hurt me to see.
"Elena, I'm really sorry I hurt you." Yugo told me sincerely, pleadingly, as his gaze danced between my own. "The last thing I want is to hurt you..."
I bit the inside of my cheek painfully, trying to divert from my emotions. It worked enough to let words get past a lump that had formed in my throat.
"Yugo..." I tried, then stopped to take a fortifying breath. My body was shaking with nerves, the only warm part of me being where our hands connected. This wasn't something I wanted to be doing. Yugo wasn't giving me another choice though. Mentally I did my best to try and prepare myself for whatever wound this would give me, "can you honestly tell me what you felt...?"
We had stopped just before the tunnel had split into two. Dally and Ruel had disappeared down the gentle curve of the left tunnel and the light from Rubilax had long since left us behind. All we had was the dim glow of the plants around us, barely illuminating but enough to see by.
Yugo blinked at me, confusion in his gaze. "Huh?"
Again my stomach twisted as I realized that I had to show him. I tried in vain to tamp down the initial excitement at the thought, kept in mind how this had made him feel before.
"Look..." with my free hand, I showed him my palm and the magic already there that made my skin glow. He glanced at my hand, then back to me, without any comprehension in his gaze.
Without actually touching him, I dragged my hand from his elbow down to his wrist, over the back of one of his hands that were still wrapped around my other one. His skin glowed with his own magic, but only directly under my hand. It was mesmerizing to see and felt both calming and warm but not nearly as much as I would have felt if I'd given him a hug.
"What... do you feel?" I questioned of him, then felt how my stomach revolted at the question. When he didn't answer right away, I somehow found the strength to speak again. Weakly, "please... tell me honestly," I pushed to know.
"I..." he looked away from the glowing patterns I was able to make over his skin. I couldn't see his eyes. His tone was soft and filled with nerves again, "w- warm... refresh...ing..." As he spoke his volume grew so quite it was nearly nonexistent. He took a breath and finally looked me in the eye again, "...ex... exhil...erating..."
My stomach flipped, mood lightening when I didn't hear anything negative as I had feared I would.
"...and... that's good?" I questioned lightly, needing to make sure. Brow furrowed, I did my best to get out what I meant and spoke slowly as I searched for the right words. "You're not just... saying that... so I don't hurt?"
Relief washed through me as he nodded, "it's- it's the truth." He confirmed for me and that sick feeling in my stomach dissolved as though it had never been there to begin with. With it gone, I felt quite light. As though something heavy had been removed from my chest. I could breathe so much easier.
"...and you?" Yugo questioned then, sounding uncertain all of a sudden.
"Hm?" Not sure what he was asking, I tilted my head curiously.
Freeing one of his hands Yugo showed me his palm as it began to glow softly with his magic. Just as I had to him, he ghosted his hand just over the skin of my arm. I was fascinated to see how my own magic lit up my skin just under his hand, followed his movements like how Moon would follow after food when he was hungry. It was pretty.
"What..." Yugo paused. Spoken only a little too quick, "doyoufeel..?"
"Warm," I started and closed my eyes to allow myself to do as he asked. "Like being in the sun at high noon... calm like viewing a clear night sky... and safe," slowly I opened my eyes and met his gaze feeling almost as though I were somewhere between sleep and wakefulness. "Just like when you give me hugs."
For a long moment we simply stayed as we were. I could practically see how he processed my words. Eventually Yugo broke the silence, voice rough with emotion. "And... you really mean that, Elelna?"
"You're my favorite person, Yugo." I admitted softly, just for him to hear. In that moment I felt rather vulnerable. I needed him to believe me because this wasn't a lie. "I wouldn't say so if it wasn't true."
Wide eyed he stared, stunned. Worry began to wiggle around in my gut the longer it lasted, especially when the red on his face rapidly began to spread over the rest of him. But then he squeezed my hand and his brow furrowed.
"Then why..." head tilted his tone implored me, and I could only enjoy the elation in knowing that he does believe me for only a few seconds. "Why wouldn't you... you want to feel that a... again..?"
"That's not..." I shook my head firmly, as though to get rid of the notion physically. "That's not it."
He took a breath and let it out slowly. "Then... what is..?"
"I don't..." a whine left me involuntarily then, sounding just as distressed as I felt. "Why would I... if I'm the only one comfortable with it..?"
"Oh..." he took in a sharp breath, "oh! That's not..!" Yugo shook his head rapidly and I could only watch, confused. "What I didn't like..." he grew very still but didn't look away from my eyes. "Was... was others... being around..."
For a second I didn't quite understand. Why would someone else being around bother him? Especially when those other people were ones he seemed to trust- at least enough to travel with? Then I realized how it might be like how I didn't like to cry in front of others, and how the only time I didn't quite mind crying was if it was just him or Moon present with me.
"Okay." I answered simply, giving him a nod and feeling quite light all over again. Light and content. "Not in front of others."
"Elena," Yugo brought up his hand to show me again, "just this." He closed his eyes tightly. "H- hugs shouldbefine-!" He looked away to his right, and his voice was filled with nerves. "If.. if you're okay with that..."
Okay with it?! My heart practically jumped out of my chest in my delight. Hugs whenever I wanted!?
"Yes!" I agreed happily, feeling as though I could travel to the stars and back with very little effort in that moment. "I'd love that!"
He looked a little startled at that. I couldn't help but grin, "Yugo, you don't know? Your hugs are the best."
Somehow even redder than before, Yugo made some noises that might have been attempts to speak. I'm not sure why he got this way from time to time but I was starting to see how it was similar to how Moon would talk to me when he was excited or delighted about something. I thought that it was sweet.
Tilting my head to one side, I listened down the tunnel. I couldn't hear Dally and Ruel's footsteps anymore. So I tugged our clasped hands gently.
"Common," I turned and started to head towards the left tunnel. Yugo fell silent. "Lets not worry them."
"Wait." Yugo tugged back. I stopped, turned to see him. But Yugo was looking down the right tunnel, opposite of the one Dally and Ruel had gone down. He squinted his azure eyes, "what... what is that?"
Leaned forward somewhat I redirected my gaze around him to see in the direction he was looking, I froze. The tunnel we looked down went on for quite a ways, illuminated only by the plants inside and occasional line of slime on the ceilings and walls. Just where the light started to become a total darkness an odd movement could be seen. Something long and thin waved about in the air. Like a snake that lifted their head, ready to strike.
"I'm not sure..." I informed Yugo quietly, "I haven't been this far into the mountain before... and I suppose Moon could have his reasons to not like these tunnels- and I don't just mean 'cause he doesn't like being underground..."
"You think it's a creature?" Yugo questioned, intrigued. "It might be Amalia's plants..."
"Let's find out."
Circling my hand, I created a portal parallel to the ceiling right above where I could see whatever-it-was moving. I watched carefully for the moment when it winked into existence- and saw how movement abruptly stopped. Then four more long thin- limbs? Vines? Tentacles? Bodies?- slowly joined the first and reached up towards the portal. Before it could make contact, I dispersed my portal and the things seemed to freeze again.
"I think it's a creature..." I confirmed for Yugo, bewildered. "I've never seen anything like it though."
"Me neither." Yugo agreed, just as some sort of body came into view.
Dread began to seize my chest as I took in how whatever-this-was seemed to be just as thick as I was tall, taking up nearly half of the space in the tunnel. It somewhat resembled a snake- with a large wide head that was more oval than flat. The body was long and grew thinner the further away from the head it was. It was hard to tell in the darkness but I thought it must have been at least as long as half the length of the mast of the ship.
Long thin legs protruded from it's body like an ant or spider, hundreds of them all down it's sides. It held its head up as it moved, arced in a similar way that a scorpion would hold it's tail when poised to strike. Several of it's long thin legs at the front were used like feelers to find it's way while the others propelled the creature forward silently down the tunnel towards us.
Those legs used like feelers gently slid across the walls and ceiling and floor. They wiggled about like seaweed caught in an ocean current. And as the creature grew closer, I could see how those feelers had thick thorns.
"What the-! Elena-! Yugo-!" Neither of us moved to look towards the depths of the tunnel at the distant echo of our names. The creature however, froze. That icy thing of dread in my stomach only grew.
Dally's voice called out even louder than before, closer, "where'd they go!?"
"I told you not to run off!" Ruel called after Dally, and his panting echoed to us along with both of their frantic paces.
Faster than I thought possible for how slow and precisely it had traveled, one of those feelers shot forwards towards the ceiling, wrapped around a sizable slug, and brought the mollusk straight to it's head. The head seemed to open right in half, revealing tiny pointed teeth all around it's circumference. With a shake from the feeler the slug seemed to fall straight in- in two separate pieces. There was a quiet snap as the creature's head swiftly closed again. Then it was on its way once more, moving much less precisely as it picked up it's pace, legs and body weaving like a centipede.
Quiet suddenly I became all too aware of both Dally and Ruel whom were quickly- loudly- approaching.
This time when I tugged on our hands, Yugo gave no resistance. We quickly dashed forwards towards the glow Rubilax gave off. After a few paces I looked back and saw how one of those feelers now wiggled about in the air right where we had been, body not yet visible from beyond the bend.
"There you are-" Dally began happily, only for Yugo to quickly shush him.
We came to a halt in front of Dally, and I held up both my hands, palms out in preparation as I faced where we'd come from. My heart sank as nerves built in my stomach.
Everything outside the glow from Rubilax looked pitch black from here.
In a low whisper, "can Rubilax go back to normal?" I asked worriedly as I desperately tried to see into the darkness without the steady soft glow of the plants.
"What's the... the mater with... you two?" Ruel panted as he came to a stop and put his hands on his knees while he caught his breath.
I held my own breath and did my best to listen around the sound of my heart in my ears. While I had been certain that it moved silently before, I was hoping that I could at least pick up on the sound of the feelers against the walls and ceiling of the tunnel. Somehow try to determine just how close it was without seeing it.
"Dally-!" Yugo hissed as he looked just as intently as I did into the darkness. "Now!"
"Huh? Alright," Dally complied and smacked Rubilax's blade on the tunnel wall.
In an instant the light from the blade went out. We were plunged into total darkness as everything adjusted. And I felt something catch on my clothes. The same sort of resistance felt when they caught on a bramble bush in the forest.
My breath hitched as I took a step back. Desperately I blinked in attempt to help my eyes adjust already- something long, strong, and sharp wrapped around my middle in several loops.
I was lifted off my feet, breath forced out of my lungs as my ribs were squeezed. Then I was shaken from side to side, like a doll. Instantly I felt sick and did my best to hold on as pain flared up all throughout my body. My hands grabbed onto the feeler desperately and I kicked up my legs to help wrap around it too. Around me I could hear the distress of Yugo, Ruel, and Dally but I couldn't see them. I could only assume they were in a similar situation.
My grip was starting to become slippery with both my hands and legs and soon I had no other choice but to let go. As soon as I did the shaking stopped.
A groan of relief left me, even if I was still immensely uncomfortable. Hands and legs throbbed painfully to the same tune that frantically pounded in my head. My eyes drifted shut heavily as I fought for a shallow intake of breath but my ribs couldn't move to allow for the proper amount of air needed. It made me dizzy.
Grunts of pain rang duly in my ears as three bodies thumped to the tunnel floor. I opened my eyes as I felt myself get tilted up onto my back. Gravity pulled the most at my head and hands and feet as I was held upside down.
Below me I could see a beautiful dark blue flower opened wide, the edges of each petal pointed like rows of teeth. It took me a moment before I registered that this was the creature's head- apparently it was some sort of plant monster.
The realization struck me as funny- of course I was gonna get eaten by a plant monster. Absolutely perfect.
Then fear began to grip at my insides as I also realized-
I'm about to be eaten.
Posted: June 21, 2024
Edited: Dec. 2, 2024