Somehow, Ruby managed to not die after the entire fucking world decided to just open up beneath her— mostly by virtue of having an absurdly useful Semblance that dumped her out of the line and on the ground with some measure of grace, avoiding the rest of the sinkhole's falling rubble.

What mom would say: 'See that? I trained that."

What mum would say: 'Oh shut up, Rae. I'm the one who taught her Semblance use.'

What Uncle Tai would say: 'Hey, good job, Rubes. Clean landing.'

What uncle Qrow would say: 'No sweat, kid, keep an eye out— you're not outta the woods yet.'

God, her moms sucked. At least she had good uncles to listen to. Ruby looked around.

Underground. To be expected.

Big cavern. Sick. Love a big cavern.

Buildings? Weird but whatever. Place is abandoned either—

People. Ah. Not abandoned.

A couple of odd subterraneans stared at her, gawking with normal eyes and normal dark skin that (disappointingly) wasn't hyperadapted to a lightless world underground. Honestly, Weiss looked more like she belonged.

"Uh… hello," Ruby said slowly, steadying herself on one knee as the bloodless rush caught up with her— not too bad since she'd filled up before bed. "I, uh, fell. As you can see."

They looked at each other, then back at Ruby. One of them said: "You're a Faunus."

The other one said: "Oh fuck, you're that Faunus."

Ruby noticed that, beneath all the dust, they were wearing red-colored robes. She groaned. "You gotta be kidding me."

"We gotta be kidding you?" One of them pulled out a pistol and leveled it with her. The other fumbled at their belt until they turned on their radio and barked out words too quick for Ruby to stop, especially so soon after blinking once.

"Stay where you are," pistol-person commanded once Ruby started moving to take her weapons out.

"I'm… not gonna do that."

Pistol-person growled, which wasn't very intimidating. "You should!" they reiterated.

Ruby sprinted towards them, ducking beneath one shot but taking another that struck her shin like a ball-peen hammer even after her Aura had deflected it. Her leg flew out from under her and sent her stumbling forward, rolling, but she popped back to her feet disc- first and smashed radio-guy's jaw against the edge of her buckler. She clawed for the other one, but her angle was shitty and they managed to scoot away, firing into her Aura twice as they retreated. Ruby rocked back from the blows, nearly tripping over the newly-unconscious body of radio-guy.

He shot at her again, this time missing, and absolutely domed the unconscious radio-guy with a wet splkht. Ruby took the chance to whirl around, her disc coming with until she chucked it straight into the emotional processing area of his temporal lobe. The thing bounced off with a haunting clunk, leaving him standing in a stupor as Ruby caught the disc off the skull-bounce and properly bashed him with it. Pistol-guy, cerebrally dented, ragdolled to the ground.

Ruby: in hole.

Guys: incapacitated.

Bed: shitted.

Current assessment: not lookin' good. Lookin' distinctly bad, in fact. Lookin' downright abysmal. Ruby was trapped in an apparent UNDERGROUND CITY beneath an abandoned Lesser Vale expansion, the place had Fourths in it, and they recognized her. Which meant…

"Bellbell! What're you doing here!"

Fuck. Goddammit. Shit. "Bell," Ruby's itching throat answered as she slipped a hand into her wire gauntlet.

Penny approached from deeper in the cavern/city, accompanied by a gaggle of racists.

"Bell," Ruby repeated, going scarlet despite how this was really not the time to be embarrassed about ticcing. "Bell."

"Funny little birds," Penny taunted, rising off the ground with a burst of green energy. "You're a parrot, right?"

Ruby blinked hard. "Bell."

"Just kidding," Penny jeered sweetly, floating over until Ruby's disc morphed into a broad knife. She grinned despite the weapons. "You're obviously a crow."

"I am— Be—" Ruby threw her head aside and growled, touching near enough to the right spot that she could get out, "I'm not a crow, you dick."

Penny flew even closer, not at all stopping as Ruby tensed in warning, until she was within a couple meters. From this far, Ruby noticed her hair was different. "Say, birdie, you wanna get back in your cage?" She dangled an invisible treat. "Just put all that down and I'll give you lots of tasty seeds!"

Ruby curdled. "Please die."

Penny giggled. "Make me!"

Ruby plotted.

Weiss Schnee awoke to the most perfect sound in the world. Nothing could be more graceful, no note more elegant, no voice more melodic. It was the sound she wanted to wake up to every day for the rest of her life:

BARKBARKBARKBARKBARKBARKBARKBARKBARKBARKBARKBARKBARKBARKBARKBARK

She made haste from her bedroll— nearly stumbling into their all-but-ember campfire— and knelt before the tiny dog, ignoring the groans of her less morning-minded compatriots. She stroked his perfect head and scratched his cheeks, but he would not ease in his barking. She frowned. "Zwei? What's wrong?"

BARKBARKBARK BARKBARKBARKBARK-BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK-BARKBARK BARK— BARKBARKBARK, BARKBARK— BARK, BARKBARKBARKBARK.

(Dear god, did he have grammar?)

(What a smart boy!)

"Zwei, my sweet creature, I am so sorry but I don't understand!"

"Yangmgunaskinerdogivheduzntzhuduhfughup," Blake moaned into her pillow, translating into: 'Yang, I'm gonna skin your dog if he doesn't shut the fuck up,' which would never happen. Weiss would let herself die a hundred times before Blake got anywhere near the precious baby boy.

Zwei nipped Weiss' pajamas ('pajamas' being a pair of 'sleep-sweats' she stole from Ruby), tugging her away from their site.

"Egads!" Weiss exclaimed (because it sounded like a word for which Ruby would lampoon her [but she was not researching odd or old words on the web to endear her girlfNEMESIS because that would be preposterously obsessive] and she wanted to give it a trial run). "Hark! The hound hath a message, doesn't he! The sweet perfect baby boy bringeth a message!"

Blake genuinely shot at her (missing, but still), which managed to get everyone out of their bedroll in a flash— Yang first, who scrambled over and ripped the gun out of Blake's hand, dropped the magazine, then racked and locked the slide back in such a smooth succession that Blake was left staring up at her, her face red.

Blake smacked her lips and mumbled: "God, I wish I had a crush on you."

Yang huffed out a humorless laugh before returning the pistol. "Do not shoot at Weiss. You're lucky Ruby's not here."

Blake snorted. "Lol, as if. She's, like, ten years old."

"Then she's vicious for her age." Yang kicked her partner's foot. "Get up, dumbass."

Professor Oobleck (he was supervising them again, but he was more like a piece of background furniture than a person) hummed. "You all are awfully… candid with one another. Does your leader act like this, too?"

BARKBARKBARKBARKBARK

That was it! It must be Florabel, she was the last person attending the sweet and perfect Zwei!

"It's Florabel!" Weiss exclaimed, which made Zwei spin excitedly. "Follow the hound!"

With reluctant groans and a pantsless Blake (good god, her legs were so hairy), they took up arms and made their trek in the perfect sweet baby boy's wake, moving near a full sprint as the squat little creature blasted back the way he'd come. The ragged streets of the abandoned sector wrought hell on Weiss' ankles, tripping her multiple times in her pursuit of the good boy, but she managed not to be fully bowled over until Zwei made a sudden stop. Her well-loved canvas shoes, despite (or as a symptom of) how much she loved them, finally ripped at the seam of sole and shoe as she made a full and sudden stop. The unexpected give made her fall completely forwards, skidding past Zwei in what was probably a comical tumble before her face skidded on the—

Nothing.

The nothing.

There was nothing for her face to skid along.

The world was an open wound beneath her. Dark. Deep. Smelly.

Weiss scrambled back with a gasp, realizing she had almost come very close to discovering whether she could come back from little more than paste. Zwei nudged her with his incredible nose, then did an impossibly adorable point towards the hole.

Dr. Oobleck stood over her and leaned over the hole, looking straight down with a hard line over his lips. "Hm. It is entirely possible that your leader did not survive that fall."

Weiss shot to her feet and pushed him back, indignant. "No it is not! Florabel wouldn't let herself die to a hole!"

Oobleck raised one dark brow. "Why do you sound jealous?"

Ruby slumped against the metal door of her new Fourth prison. At the very least, she didn't have that godawful collar back on.

Unfortunately, she couldn't force her entire body through the gap in the bottom of the door— she couldn't even get an angle to see the other side and plot herself through. In short: this sucked.

Ruby flopped back and slumped into a couple of boxes. This was clearly some kind of subway maintenance room, judging by the words 'SUBWAY MAINT 13' in faded yellow across the door. The handle actually locked from her side— she could turn it just fine— but there were chains or something barricading her in on the other side.

"Fucking…" Ruby sighed. "Fuck."

Penny packed her up pretty quick, only by virtue of having like 40 guys worth of backup. It was easy when all the fodder broke with one move but, when Penny could meet her blinks and keep her from trimming all the fat, it was hard not to get whittled down by the repeated small-arms fire and bludgeons that she could no longer stop. She had a bullet wound that luckily deflected off her ribcage, but the graze it left was pretty nasty: a rift torn across her left side, now scabbed over and sticking to the ripped fabric of her hoodie. She kept her Aura burning over her right hand, willing it to the surface to draw the restorative soul-energy away— she didn't want the frayed threads of her hoodie to get healed over inside her flesh (not any more than they already were).

Fuckin… maintenance room. Not even big enough to sit comfortably. She could hear some great metal churning through the walls— a generator, no doubt, probably abandoned with the rest of this lost sector. What it could be powering, she had no idea. She'd been fighting Penny one moment then waking up in here, probably passing out at some point during the former. God, Penny better not have done anything weird while she was unconscious.

…

Fuck.

Fuck, what was she going to do.

Fucking Fourths, again— the same Fourths, what kinda bullshit is that! A literal sinkhole opens up under her feet and dumps her right into their lap— did god hate her, or something? The hell was she supposed to do? Wait around until they got the altar ready?

Maybe when they came to get her, she could blink out of it… assuming they'd try to sacrifice her again, not just shoot her outright, which wasn't very sensible anymore. They knew she could teleport around; even if they did have another collar, there was no guarantee they'd be able to get it on her again. Not without significant casualties.

Open the door and gun her down? She might get away from it.

Grenades under the door? They probably would've done that already. Same with gassing her.

Their only good options were having Penny take her out, or just leaving her in the room until she staved. And Penny…

Penny could. She 100% could. With no weapons, Ruby was fucked. The girl was definitely an android or something, because her claws didn't do much either, and she could feel that kind of steel strength every time Penny had gotten her hands around her.

But she didn't. She could've kicked Ruby's head off her shoulders or blown a hole through her chest a dozen times, but she never did. She was down for the sacrifice, so it wasn't like she was averse to death, but killing her…

Unless she couldn't.

Oh, shit, she couldn't. A murder-bot that couldn't even murder! Ha!

"Dumbasses!"

Even if no one heard her, that felt good. Benefits of being begrudgingly intelligent. Whatever. At least she could figure out some things.

Things except getting out of here. If only she had tools; she could make some kind of opening and squeeze herself out through the line… as long as she could get past the guards. Not that it mattered, since she didn't have tools. Not like they locked her in a maintenance closet or anything.

"Oh. I'm the dumbass."

Weiss screamed the entire way down the hole. Her limbs flailed. Her face probably did something, too. She was hyper-aware that she looked like an idiot, and that she would die like an idiot, because she was an idiot.

'I have no way down.'

'What?'

'I have no way down.'

'Wym?'

'How do you not have a way down?'

'I'm afraid I must agree with Miss Xiao Long: how exactly did you land in the initiation test?'

'I did something complicated with my pommels— am I expected to remember every landing strategy I concoct?'

'Bruh.'

'Yeah. You are.'

'Again, I must agree with Miss Xiao Long.'

'Then a fool I am! Whatever! Irregardless, I have no way down.'

'Irregardless, lmao.'

'Yeah, it's just regardless, dude.'

'Once again, I concur with—'

'Fine! I get it! Just… one of ye figure something out! Yang, thou wert our leader last, clearly thou'st some font of knowledge I've yet tapped!'

'Quit being a baby bro we'll literally catch you.'

'I'm pretty sure I can manage it without breaking all your bones.'

'Miss Schnee, I believe that's the best option you'll be getting tonight.'

'Catch— thou— you— you wilt catchest— fine! Fine. I care not. So long as I get to Florabel.'

'What was that?'

'Just jump in the damn hole!'

'Chill, princess.'

'Do not call me that!'

'Ruby calls you—'

'Thou'st heard no such thing! Furthermore, shouldst ye fail to catch me, Florabel wilt be the one to avenge me!'

'Lmao. Sure.'

'Eh… I dunno, B, she's scrappy as hell. And mom got her whole 'YOUR LIFE IS MINE AND OURS ARE YOURS' thing into her way better than me. She might do it.'

'Lol.'

'For god's sake, quit stalling and jump in the damn-ed hole!'

She didn't even have to jump in this godforsaken sinkhole. Yang, Blake, and Oobleck were probably enough; she could've been trusted to watch their camp or just stay outside the sinkhole and keep an eye out. But no. No, she had to jump in the hole. She just had to go after Florabel herself. Nobody else could get their hands on her, and she had to be there to reinforce that. All because she was dumb enough to lay claim to some birdbrained, black-feathered, bird-legged… beaked… bemuscled…

No, no time to think of Florabel, focus on dying!

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA—"

Fwump.

"Holy shit, Weiss, chill."

("AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA")

"Turn her off and on again lul."

"Ew. Never speak to me again."

("AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA")

"Yang is literally holding you, dude. You're not falling."

"I don't think she's cognizant."

Weiss continued screaming for a few more seconds before her body realized that she was no longer on a collision course with death, instead being cradled in the unreasonably buff arms of one Yang Xiao Long. She blinked hard and looked around, regaining her bearings, her first steps hitching when Yang set her back down.

She coughed. Dust (the mundane kind that might cause Silicosis, rather than the expensive kind that might cause Explosive Silicosis) was sufficiently prevalent to occlude their surroundings, so she stumbled blindly instep with her group until—

Thmp.

She kicked a corpse.

It was a Fourth corpse (identifiable by the robes Weiss had once festooned herself with), one whose skull had been rapidly evacuated by means of small-arms fire. There were more blood splatters near him— clear signs of a fight— but he was the only remaining human evidence of violence. Weiss felt her blood run cold.

They had Florabel. Again. Her Florabel.

"Fourth-Archivists took her. Again," Weiss growled, something wretched bubbling up from her guts and burning up her chest. "God dammit! Wretched little cunts!" she shrieked— very unholy of her— and stomped to the furthest splatter of blood. She furiously marched from it, finding another group of scuffs and blood splatters that she followed. She ripped her sword from its sheath and screwed a pommel of flame to it, making the blade glow a hot orange.

"Bring me my Florabel you bastards!" Weiss shouted into the yawning depths of the underground space. "The true Eidolon of thy feeble Fourth fetishization cometh! With arms and with force I have come!"

A tone rose in her voice, volume rising, her sword held high in tandem. She bellowed from her soul. She declared from her heart. From the deepest reaches of her being, she crusaded:

Take up thy swords and bare thy fangs! Come ye one and all to test thy bastard belief upon the blade of a true Fourth!

"Hold up a sec, Weiss, Blake is vomiting."

Whyfor!

"Because there's a fucking corpse over here, dude!"

Swallow thy regurgitant and take up arms at my back! Let us give these faecal Fourths a new altar to bleed upon!

"W— heugh— w-what the fuck, dude—"

A new pantheon! A Fifth and Sixth and Seventh! Since these heretics are so ready to discard their truths!

"Weiss, wait up!"

"Bro! Chill!"

"Miss Schnee!"

A Fifth of fist and flame! A Sixth of shadow and scorn! A Seventh of… er… scholarship!

Aw fuck Fifth of fists is cool.

Sixth of shadow… heu-urk… based ngl.

Good lord, Miss Schnee.

Rally! To Florabel!