Chapter 10 – Distraction
Saturday, October 1st, 2022
Gabi's POV
Amber and I were laughing as I was trying my damn hardest to think about the little baby in my belly. The fact that we transferred yesterday, and it was surreal. The whole day was surreal as the transfer went so beautifully and Troy was nothing but amazing throughout the entire process. Once I got home, I found my sister in my bed, and I curled up with her as I took a nap, and she took care of the house and Ember. I slept for a few hours before getting up and lounging on the couch when Troy came home with take-out, and we laughed while just talking to each other. The team left just an hour before us but that should give them enough time to get to the hotel and checked in.
"I am trying not to bring it up…" she dragged out and I couldn't stop my laugh, "It went really well. Troy was amazing. I wasn't that uncomfortable besides the pressure and just having to go to the bathroom, but it went so well and now we just have to wait for ten days, and I am dying." Amber laughed as she shook her head, "It's only the first full day!" I felt my cheeks get hot, "I know, I know, I just want to know. Troy said he plans on distracting me every single day this week." Amber smirked, "I bet he has all sorts of plans."
"We're going to North Carolina on Tuesday to check in at the beach house and I will get to see my parents and his parents are down there right now. It's a quick trip as we will be back that night. I don't know what he really has planned after that." I told her and she gave me a smile. "You know?" I questioned and she laughed, "I just know one day, but I am pretty sure he basically made me sign an NDA." I shook my head with a laugh as the flight wasn't took long and I couldn't wait to check out Green Bay. Troy said we had reservations tonight before curfew and then he had a few little plans up his sleeve.
"Was Claire upset that she couldn't come?" I shook my head, "Eve planned a fun weekend for her to make it seem like Eve needed to keep her because they had fun plans, and she happily went along with it. She has no idea that we did our transfer yesterday."
"When will you tell her?" she asked, "Early ish. We don't want her to be the last to find out, but we also want to have some certainty. She is going to be so excited." Amber smiled as she rubbed her own belly for a moment, "I can't imagine what you are going through but I hope you know you are doing it with strength and grace." I shook my head a little, "I've been a mess," I tried to admit but she shook her own head back in return. "No, you've had feelings and that isn't a bad thing." Amber glanced at me, and I just gave a smile, "Thank you," I told her, and she shook her head, "You are giving a million people hope every single day that they can also do the hardest thing. You are so real about it, too. You don't hide the emotional side. You embrace it. I think that is something you are so good at showing. It's not over the top but it's powerful and raw."
Amber squeezed my knee, and I exhaled as I wiped away the tears that collected, "I always tell Hanson that I want him to be more like Troy, especially for our daughters. Troy doesn't hide his emotion which in return shows his daughter that it's okay to have those feelings and there is nothing to be embarrassed about." I laughed, "I know, I love that about him. Claire told me the other day it's okay to be sad and Daddy tells her that all the time. That we can have sad emotions." Amber rolled her eyes to the heavens, "Is he perfect?" we both just dissolved into giggles.
"I cannot wait to watch you grace parenthood along with it." I laughed and she shook her head, "The way Lulu loves you? The way you love back? God, I remember when you were just coming around and you were really just Claire's nurse at the time. You have so much love for those kids." I gave her a tiny smile and she nodded, "You are going to be amazing."'
"Thank you, Amber." She smiled and pulled out a thing of cards from her purse, "Want to play until we land?" I just laughed with a tiny nod. It was only about forty-five more minutes before our flight was touching the ground. The car was waiting for the two of us and we got off on the tarmac and quickly into the car. The bags were put in the back, and we made the drive to the hotel. I shot Troy a text that we had made it. He sent a heart back and said he would meet me in the lobby before his meeting this afternoon. I agreed as I wanted to take a nap before we did dinner tonight.
Once the car pulled up Hanson and Troy were sitting on the bench outside laughing. I smiled watching him as I thanked the driver as we both slipped out. Hanson and Troy were grabbing our bags and I walked over as he smiled. "I need a hug," I told him, and he chuckled as he tugged me into his body. His lips pressing into my hair, "We were only separated for a handful of hours," I just laughed, "I know, I just missed you." He kissed me again before picking up my bag and then picking up my hand. "Amber, did she behave on the flight?" Amber giggled, "Yea, she was a really good girl."
Hanson just laughed as Troy kissed below my ear, "My good girl," he murmured. Goosebumps spread down my arm, and he chuckled quietly as we got into the elevator. Troy put my pass around my neck as you had to have a pass to be on the floor. His was in sticking on his backpack he had on. "How was the flight?" Hanson asked, "Good," Amber and I both responded. "We had some fun chatting. Talking about some boy names," I shot a wink towards Hanson, and he hummed a laugh. Troy smirked, "Gabi and I have a girl name picked out." I swung around to face him, "We do?" Those blue eyes had a hint of humor behind them. "You don't remember senior year? We were bored during study hall one day and we were sitting on the floor, and we talked about baby names?"
It registered immediately.
"I forgot about that." I breathed as the elevator delivered us to the floor. We all stepped out as we waved good-bye to Amber and Hanson as we went the other way passing security. Troy opened the door and I blinked. "I completely forgot about that. You remembered that?" I questioned and Troy tossed me a look, "I remember everything, remember?" I blinked and Troy pushed me gently on the bed as he crawled over my bed and pressed a kiss into my forehead. "I haven't forgotten a damn thing, Gabriella." I stared up at those blue eyes and he held my face. "I still hope you love it."
I blinked and nodded, "I do. It's still my number one name on my list for girls." He gave a soft smile, "Good. It's mine, too."
Sunday, October 2nd, 2022
Troy's POV
The ball spiraled down the field and I watched Reggie jump up and catch it before running five more yards. I pumped my fist before running down the field, I listened to the next play in my helmet before I repeated it back to my team. We broke from the huddle as this was probably our last drive and we were winning by 14. I was hoping to make it 21 and seal the deal for the night. I yelled my cadence at the line and then Derek snapped me the ball before I handed it off to Remi as he took off running. He ran to get nine yards and I waited out the play clock and got the next play ready.
Football was easier to focus on today than I originally thought it was to be. Claire had scans on Wednesday. We found out the results on Friday. Gabi had her pregnancy test on Monday. My mind was stressed and anxious, but I threw it in football instead. I was trying to focus on the one thing I could control and remaining undefeated in October was a the very top of my list of things to do today. We got all the way to the fifteen and I made a connection with Hanson as he caught the ball and came down in the end zone. I threw my hands up as I went running after him and he did our little celebration dance before running off the field together. Coach pushed my pads, "Great game, Bolton," I grinned as I grabbed a water and I let my eyes wonder for a second to the suite that the girls were in.
She was laughing but sitting, thank God, and seemed to be light. I wanted her to remain light and carefree through these ten days. We couldn't do anything about the time, but I could do everything in my power to make it easier for her. Tomorrow, we were going to go to the movies and just have a date with Claire. Tuesday, we were all flying down to Charleston and getting dinner with our families in Wilmington. Wednesday, she nicely said she would go with Claire for her scans since I couldn't, and it calmed all of my anxiety that Gabi was there. She said she could check on a lot of The Sunshine Pact while she was there and then she was going home with Eve. I had a late day at the facility so Scarlett and Auggie were going to surprise her for dinner.
She had meetings all day on Thursday, and I had the board taking her out for dinner as I have another full day. On Friday, I had practice in the morning but the afternoon off. We were going to Claire's results together and honestly; I just want to come home and relax after that but if she needed something else, I would come up with it on the fly. Wren and Val are coming to stay with her on Saturday night for a little friend sleepover. I had people coming over to pamper her before the game and then I was going to find somebody to give her a damn sleeping pill for Sunday night.
I might also need a sleeping pill for Monday.
I talked with my quarterback coach and then our head coach as we secured the win. I put on my baseball hat backwards as I walked out onto the field and found the Green Bay Packers quarterback and their coach before talking to a handful of other players as I felt good. This season felt good. It felt almost a little like last season when it was wobbly in my everyday life but on the football field. Everything was put together and it felt good. Football gives me that outlet that I can just…be myself and not worry about the outside noise. It was my escape from life. I know Gabi finds The Sunshine Pact her escape but sometimes she can't stop the noise when she is sitting at a computer. I headed to the locker room where I tried to fly through my post-game routine. We listened to coach talk before I showered, redressed, and I headed towards press.
I stood on the podium as I wanted to see Gabi before we had to board the bus. "Troy, you played well tonight. Does it feel good out there?" I nodded my head, "It does. Football feels smooth this year, and I am playing really well. I am going to keep up my work and keep pushing my team to be better." I answered honestly. "It seems you play well in chaos of life. Last year, you had your daughter finishing her battle with cancer and your divorce and this year you and your new wife are doing IVF?" I laughed, "I was actually thinking this tonight. Football is able to quiet my mind. I can focus on what I am doing and my everyday life leaves for a little bit. It's one of the reasons I love the football field."
"Next week you face the Lions, how are you going to prepare?"
"Like every other week. We are going to work hard, practice hard, and watch a lot of film. We are going to be prepared. The Lions could be a sneaky good team and we are not underestimating them." I took a few more questions before I got off the stand and went in the hunt for Gabi. It wasn't long before I found her and was wrapping her up into my arms. "You played so damn good!" she said, and I couldn't contain my laugh as I took her mouth with mine. "Did you relax up there?" I asked her and she smiled, "You made it easy to relax with the quick lead." I smirked, "Good. My plan worked." Gabi rolled her eyes as she shoved my shoulder. I tugged her against my again, "I would give anything to fly home with you again, fuck celebrating." Gabi laughed and it was music to my ears. "Troy, you have fun with your friends. I am going to fly back with Amber, and we are probably going to sleep. I am tired and my social battery is dying."
"Cuddles when I get home?"
"Yea, depends on if Claire is awake or not."
I snorted, "She better not be."
I checked my phone to see that Eve was already at the house. Christian was keeping and putting Jackson to bed while Eve put Claire to bed at our house. "She better be asleep or else Eve is being cruel." We both laughed together as I kissed her again, "Okay, I gotta get on the bus." I let my eyes sweep over her and I tapped her nose, "Are you doing, okay? Mentally, physically, emotionally…" I drug it out and she nodded her head. "I am doing okay, I promise, I haven't had that much time to think about it." I nodded and waved to Amber. "Thanks for being with her today." She smiled, "She isn't the worst company," she shot a wink towards Gabi as they both laughed before heading off in their own direction.
Gabi went simple today with a pair of jeans, knee high boots, and a red sweater with simple make-up. Fucking beautiful. Hanson shoved me, "I like seeing you in love." I just rolled my eyes.
Monday, October 3rd, 2022
Gabi's POV
Troy chuckled as we sat on both sides of Claire as we were seeing some kiddie movie. I didn't really care as this morning I entertained Claire and worked on some of her schoolwork for the week and then Troy snuck us into a theater to see a movie. It wasn't packed as it was early on a Monday afternoon, and we were seeing an older movie. Claire was happily munching on her popcorn and treats as Troy reached around the back of her chair and rubbed the back of my neck. I leaned into his touch as Claire giggled at a scene playing in front of us. Troy smiled looking down at her and I smiled watching him watch his daughter.
I could barely make out those blue eyes as they shifted to me, and he smiled before he turned back to the screen, but those fingers still worked on my neck until I was putty in his hands. I couldn't keep my head up and it caused him to chuckle but in time with Claire's own giggle from the movie. The movie was probably close to over and then we were grabbing dinner as a family at one of Claire's favorite restaurants. She was so happy to find Troy this morning and she didn't move from his lap until he had to get ready to go. She found her way to his lap and Troy just laughed as I quickly took her seat that was full of popcorn.
My head rested on his shoulder as we watched the end of the movie and once the credits began to roll, Troy got up and tucked Claire to his side as we bolted from the theater to not be seen and cause a ruckus. "Dad, that was so much fun!" Claire hugged him around the neck and Troy laughed, "Good. I'm glad you had a good time. Are you even hungry since you ate all that candy and popcorn?" he asked her as we got into the car. He made sure she was buckled in before joining me in the front seat. "Yes! I didn't eat that much." Troy just chuckled as he navigated out of the movie theater while his fingers slid into mine.
"How about we go to Lydia's?" he asked her, and she gasped, "Yes! I love that place!" Troy smiled as I let my fingers trace the veins in his hand and I flipped his palm over as I let my fingers ghost over his callouses. "I also have one more surprise…" I looked over at him and he chuckled, "We are going to catch the flight tonight. That way we can have breakfast with both of our families and then do all the things needed at the beach house before heading back home after dinner." I grinned, "I should have thought of that." Troy smirked, "I should have thought of it, too. My mom was the one who asked why we just didn't fly in the night before and stay there. I just need to get a work-out in tomorrow."
He pulled into the parking lot, and he had made a reservation in the backroom, and we were going through the back entrance. It was harder and harder to go out as a family without being completely bombarded. Troy was extra cautious if he brought Claire along for the ride. If it was just Troy and I, we probably would have just gone through the main entrance, but he would never put Claire at any risk. Troy took her hand as we walked through the back, and he nodded to a few people before we came to the back private room. Claire jumped on the chair and grabbed the coloring sheet. Troy grabbed me and kissed me softly, "Did you enjoy the movie?" I laughed, "It was mind numbing." Troy laughed lightly, "That was my goal." We both laughed together as we sat down with Claire.
Troy and her played tik-tac-toe and sometimes I forget that he is some mega star athlete during times like these. Just watching him play tik-tac-toe with his daughter in a restaurant. Obviously, in a private room but with the music playing and what not it felt normal. It was our normal. I rubbed my lips together as Troy hooked his ankle around my foot. "How was practice today?" I asked and he smiled, "Good. Just a lot of meetings tonight. Going over what went wrong yesterday, what can go better this week and our general game plan. Lots of film to watch on our flights." I smiled as I looked at him, "I'm proud of you," I told him, and those blue eyes snapped up to meet mine. "Where did that come from?" I shrugged, "I never tell you and I always am. I am so proud of you all the time. Watching you play football. Watching you prepare for each week. All the extra workouts that you put in, and then watching you love on Claire. Be with me? All of these things you balance, and I am proud of you for it. Plus, all the emotional turmoil that we've been through this year?"
He blinked for a moment as he stared at me, "Daddy! You're turn!" he barely noticed what he was doing before those eyes were back to me. "Gabs, you don't have to say that. I'm doing my job. I am taking care of my daughter. All things that are expected of me." I shook my head, "No, Troy, you take on an extraordinary number of things and nobody thanks you, nobody does anything but expect it from you and I sometimes don't know how you do it. I don't know how you just keep…going. I am so emotionally exhausted sometimes and you are there every single step of the way. You tell me all the time you are proud of me," Troy let his eyes fall to the game and he made his decision. "Gabi, you are going through emotional and physical pain. Every day. I am proud of you."
"And I am proud of you for handling everything."
He blinked, "Daddy, I won!"
"Good job, baby. Try the crossword search," he directed her attention to somewhere else when he slipped out of the booth and came to mine. "I just need you to know that I see you. I see the work you are putting in. I see the amount of love that you have for everything around you. I see those blue eyes get so worried about me all the time and I just…I am proud of you. I love you. I want to do this life with you." I let my head rest on his shoulder, and he moved so our eyes were connected. "Gabi," his voice was soft, and I smiled, "What, Troy Bolton?"
"I love you," I smiled with a shake of my head, "Thank you," he whispered into my ear, and I gave him a look and he just gave me a look right back to me. "Daddy, you left me." Claire interrupted and Troy chuckled as he kissed the top of my head before getting out of the booth and going back to join Claire. Our food arrived shortly after, and Troy's plan was working because I wasn't dwelling on Monday. He was keeping me distracted and I was so thankful for that.
Tuesday, October 4th, 2022
Troy's POV
We walked through the beach house as I barely recognized it. Almost all of the walls were knocked down and it was a blank slate. Gabi was talking with the interior decorator that we had hired as they discussed the windows and the doors. My eyes watched her as I think she was handling everything well. We were doing her nightly injections together still; her poor abdomen and ass was bruised senseless. I was praying that all of these distractions were helping. I hoped that baby was growing. I feared in my gut that she was going to be absolutely wrecked if this didn't go well.
"Hi honey," my mom came up beside me and I looked for my daughter with her. "She's with your dad. They are hanging out together." I smiled, "Sorry, hi mom," I kissed her cheek and she laughed, "I am glad to see that you are checking for your daughter. It makes me happier." I chuckled as she hugged me, "This is going to be so gorgeous." I watched Gabi look out at the ocean with a smile on her face. "I know, Gabi is doing amazing with all the design decisions. I am glad it's going to be open in here. I hated the walls but never knew what I wanted to do with this area."
"The big doors and windows are going to be," my mom shook her head and I laughed, "How is she doing?" she asked softly, and I smiled, "Okay," I told her. "I am doing my best to distract her. She isn't sleeping all that well because it's the one time I can't distract her but during the days are going well." She squeezed my hand, "I can't wait for you to find out on Monday," I laughed as we still had a little under a week to go. "Troy," I peered over at her as we were overhauling the pool too and it looked like that's what they were currently talking about.
"I think we do an infinity pool," she mentioned, and I looked out and I shrugged, "I don't care. Is that what you want?" she nodded her head as she pulled her lip into her mouth. "I think it would be so pretty with the beach beyond it." I nodded, "Sounds good, then we do it." Gabi blinked, "No price?" I shook my head, "No, if it makes you happy then we're doing it." She went to say something back but closed her mouth in response. She opened it again and then shook her head, "Troy," I went over to her and pressed my finger to her mouth. "Shh…what's the difference between what we were going to do and what you want to do?" I asked, Shay, and she laughed, "About fifteen grand,"
My eyes leveled with Gabi, "And what I can promise you is that this house is covered by two of my sponsorships. Relax, let's do something you love." She just nodded against my finger, and I kissed the top of her head. They walked me through some more of their decisions and I nodded as I truly didn't care. I wanted to make sure the floor plan was right but beyond that I didn't care what Gabi did. If it made her happy? Then I loved it. I thought about if everything went right, we would be bringing a baby back here next summer. I smiled at the thought of it.
Gabi and Shay started upstairs, and I followed them as my mom was trailing. She just laughed, "I should have known that you would give her anything when you were 17." I laughed as I looked at my mom, "I am just lucky I have the financial freedom to give her whatever she wants." My mom squeezed my arm, "You worked hard for that, and I love to see you making her happy because I know in the return you are making yourself happy." My eyes lingered on her as they came to Claire's room as they discussed this room and how Gabi wanted to make it feel like home when she was here.
"Troy, do you think she would want a different mural on this wall like her rainbow at home?" she asked, and I shrugged, "Maybe fun wallpaper? A beachy mural?" Gabi grinned, "Did you just give me permission for wallpaper?" I groaned and laughed at the same time. "I guess I did. Just…nothing crazy all, right?" she just smiled before turning with a grin on her face back to Shay. All my mom did was laugh. Once we got to our room that was pretty much the entire back of the house as we had expanded it. Gabi smiled at the frames for all of the windows that were going to be along the back wall. We were turning our bed to face the windows because she wanted to be able to wake up to the waves every morning. There was one slider door in the middle that led out to the balcony.
It was going to be a stunning view. I walked up behind Gabi as I let my arms fold around her neck, and she leaned back into me. "I am going to take some measurements; I'll be right back." Gabi nodded and I smiled, "This is going to be my favorite place." I told her and she laughed while interlocking her fingers into mine. "I can't wait to sit on the balcony and enjoy the fresh air with coffee." I kissed her temple and breathed in the chilly October air. "The whole house is going to be stunning, but I will always look forward to right here." She turned around in my arms and I held her against me for a moment.
Shay called for her in the bathroom as they talked through a bunch of stuff. I picked up my phone to see a text from Lucas. I answered him and then let my eyes wonder to Gabi again. We made it to the third room upstairs, which I could only presume was going to be the future nursery. "What are we thinking in here? Traditional guest room?" Shay asked and Gabi nibbled on that lip again. "No, a gender-neutral nursery." She said and Shay glanced up at Gabi. "Of course, what are we thinking?" Shay asked and I watched Gabi swallow on a lump of emotion as she was allowing herself to think about a nursery for the first time.
"I just want it to be very soft. I want browns and greens – some blue but I don't want it to feel overwhelming boy because when we get pregnant," I saw her swallow and her fingers itch to touch her belly. "We aren't going to find out the gender of the baby and I just want to have a very coastal feel. A soft oak wood crib and I don't know." She was feeling overwhelmed, and I went up behind her as I let my hand hold hers. This was the opposite of distraction right now. Shay must have sensed the shift of moods as she nodded, "I think I have a pretty good idea. I'll send you some mock-ups this week." Gabi nodded and she turned into my body.
"I am going to go to the basement and work on the theater room and the other two bedrooms for a moment with measurements. Do you want standard guest rooms," I just nodded as Shay smiled as my mom went with her. "What if we don't get a baby?" she asked into my chest. "Then we try again," I whispered to her. "Gabi, we have chances, and we are going to get you a baby in that nursery. I will move hell and high water to get this for you." I could feel the tears against my t-shirt. "I never let myself picture a nursery because then I would get too hopeful."
"You could be pregnant," I murmured to her, and she didn't say anything. She just took several deep breaths. I let her body calm down before I tipped her head backwards and kissed her softly. My hands framing her face as my thumbs wiped away a few tears. "You can dream for this baby," she inhaled and nodded as I kissed her again. "C'mon, let's go work on the theater and other spare rooms downstairs."
We made it through the rest of the house as Gabi filmed some updates and I watched her as she retreated a little bit on me. Shay must have noticed, and I smiled with a shake of my head, "Don't worry about it. She's just stressed about all the IVF stuff. I want her to have the perfect nursery." Shay smiled with a tiny nod as we all headed for our cars. "Dad has dinner on the grill." My mom mentioned and I thanked her as I got into the car with Gabi. "Hey," I whispered, "El," her eyes twisted over to me, and I shook my head, "Stop thinking about it. We're going to have dinner with our family, and we are going to get home. I'll snuggle you until you push me away." A smile poked at the corner of her lips.
"IVF, adoption, surgency, I don't care how it happens, but I am going to get you that baby," I pushed hair behind her ear, and she just nodded, "Thank you, for being there," she told me with a quiet voice. "Always," I reminded her. I held her hand the drive home and once we were back Claire was begging for pictures and updates. We sat down and showed her the pictures, of her room, etc. and she was clapping her hands with excitement. Gabi let out a laugh talking to Claire about her room, and she was excited with some pictures that Gabi showed her. "I want to live here all year," I kissed the top of her head, "You have to stay with mommy in Boston, too. Daddy works in Boston." Claire didn't say anything, and I rubbed her back, "We are going to build a new house in Boston, too. I promise, it's going to be just as cool."
"There's no beach," Claire mumbled, and Gabi only laughed in response, and I rolled my eyes, "Okay you, two," my mom laughed as Gabi smiled, "Maybe you can design your whole room in Boston," Gabi said and Claire light up like a firework. "Can I?" she asked with wide eyes between Gabi and I causing us both to laugh. "Within reason," I told her, and she just grinned and forgot about not living at the beach full time.
Thursday, October 6th, 2022
Gabi's POV
Neither Troy nor I were sleeping tonight.
I was so anxious about the pregnancy test on Monday.
Troy was anxious over Claire's scans and my pregnancy test on Monday.
I think we've both tossed and turned several times and now we were both just lying flat on the bed and staring up at the ceiling. He had a long practice today, but I had a long day with The Sunshine Pact. We all went out to dinner and when I came home, he was already home. He had been quiet since her scans yesterday. She was great during them, and I knew he was anxious for the results back. He said he practiced like shit today and I wanted to blame myself, but it was really the combination of both. "This hasn't been our best night of sleep." I whispered into the dark and he just let out a laugh.
"I don't know if I can handle bad news tomorrow, not with impending news on Monday. I don't know if I can go from sad to happy." I swallowed on the news as he was preparing for Claire's scans to be bad. He always did and I tried to remind him that Claire is doing really well. She is happy and healthy. I have zero reasons to be worried about her right now. "Can you go from happy to sad?" I questioned softly and he was quiet for a moment. "I think Monday is going to be good. There is no reason for it to not be good. Everything is going well."
He paused and sighed as he rolled over to face me, "I see why you asked the question." I laughed softly as my answer was only the same. "I think tomorrow is going to be fine, Troy. I will be with you the entire time. I promise. I already told them to not drag it out – just tell you so you can be present after that." He hummed a laugh, "Thank you," I nodded my head with a smile. "You just have to be there for me on Monday. I can't answer that call alone."
"Never. I will get home before four." I curled into his side, and he wrapped his arm around me to tug me in tightly. "I told Eve to bring her tomorrow because I needed to hug her tomorrow. I have to hug her tomorrow afterwards regardless." I nodded and I played with his t-shirt. "I arranged for Lucas to take Claire in the afternoon on Monday. I figured we could use some time the two of us regardless of the news." I kissed his shoulder, "Thank you." He nodded his head as he tangled his fingers through my hair, and we talked about nothing and everything.
The darkness outside creeping in as Thursday drifted into Friday. Troy spooned me at one point, those fingers rested on my belly, and I held my breath that there was a baby in there. That he was touching his baby. That I was growing our child. He kissed my neck and softly let those fingers just press into my belly. "You are going to be such a great mother," I swallowed on the emotion because he has seen me cry more in the past several months than he has ever before. "I already know you are the best dad there is. I am the lucky one."
"Watching you with Claire? That's how I know. She isn't yours and you still love her like she is. Eve told me one day that she was thankful that you were her stepmom because she knows how much you love that little girl. That you would do anything to protect her and keep her safe. That are you cared." I twisted my head to face him, "She said that?" he nodded his head, "A while ago. She was just talking because we were watching you both play together outside at the pool I think in North Carolina. It was fucking cute, and she was just thankful. She knows that I could have ended up with somebody that didn't."
I couldn't stop my laugh, "I don't know. We were destined for each other." I told him and he smiled, "You aren't wrong. I was always going to get back with you." We were quiet for a long time, and I thought he had finally fallen asleep, but he held me tighter after a moment and he must have thought I was asleep.
"Please let us get good news on Monday," he whispered, and I closed my eyes as I tried not to move because I didn't want him to know that I heard him because I didn't realize he was thinking more about that than Claire's scans. I really hoped it was good news, too.
Friday, October 7th, 2022
Gabi's POV
I hugged Wren so tightly as she was working with the cute little baby bump on her belly, "Look at this cute bump!" I rubbed it and she laughed, "You are going to be the cutest pregnant person. I just know it." I laughed and she winked at me because they did know but we didn't want the gossip to spread around the unit. The only people who knew were family and close friends. I needed them in my corner for everything. Troy was holding Claire as we were waiting for our appointment. "I better go sit with him or he's going to flee on me,"
Wren laughed, "Probably a good idea. I'll see you tomorrow." She said and I wrinkled my eyebrows, "Tomorrow?" I questioned and she laughed and groaned, "Fuck, I forgot it's a surprise. Oh well, surprise, Val and I are going to come over and spend the night with you on Saturday since Troy can't be there. Like the old days. The three of us camped out in front of the TV watching movies but instead of wine…apple juice." I laughed and hugged her tightly, "I cannot wait. Also, how did I get so lucky?" she giggled, "Remember when you didn't want to give him another chance?" I couldn't stop my laugh. "Yea, yea,"
She winked as I went in search of Troy and Claire as he looked blank to me, and I went over to squeeze his arm. Eve walked up as she was on the phone and Claire got down and went over to her. "Hey, look at me," Troy let those blue eyes find mine and I squeezed his hand. "You are good. We are good. Claire is good." I reminded him and he nodded as I held him closely for a moment before Dr. Rich called us into his office. I squeezed Troy's hand tightly and we walked into his office. I pushed Troy to sit down just in case he tried to pass out on me, and I let my hands fall to his shoulder. Claire was coloring on the table in the corner and Eve took her seat.
"Hi everybody, to start off quick, Claire's blood work and bone marrow aspiration was amazing. All good results," Troy stiffened underneath and even I looked up at Dr. Rich because that wasn't the normal line. Something was wrong with her scan. I gripped Troy's shoulders tighter as I felt his breathing increase. "On her scan we saw a spot," Troy flinched and felt him swallow and he tried to get up, but I shoved him back into the seat. "A spot?" Eve asked quietly as her eyes darted over to Claire. "Yes, it was tiny, and I don't think it's cancer, but I cannot confirm or deny that. We are going to wait until her next scan,"
Troy exploded with that.
"Her next scan? Why can't we repeat this scan? Why can't we do more tests?" he was starting to lose his mind and he stood up and I grabbed his hand. "Hey, look at me," I said softly as Claire was starting to pay attention. "Dr. Rich, we'll be back." I said as I pulled on his hand out to the hallway. "Gabi, I…" he was trying to breath, and I shoved him down onto the ground and I pulled his chin into my hand. "Troy, look at me," those blue eyes were swarming with tears, and I shook my head, "This isn't bad news. This just means we need to pay extra close attention to her. Her blood work was great, he said. That's perfect. That probably makes him think that it's nothing but artifact or something that will go away on its own. We can ask to come in monthly for lab work and we will repeat her scan in three months. If it grows? Then we will be worried. Okay?"
The tears spilled down his cheeks, "I will not let anything happen to her, if I was worried, I would demand more. Do you want me to look at the scan?" he nodded his head slowly. I wiped away a few of his tears as this was his biggest nightmare. "I promise, if he was worried, he would have ordered more tests." I kissed his cheek and then I pulled his head into my shoulder. I held him against me, and he eventually wrapped his arm around my neck. "Thank you," he whispered into my ear, and I squeezed him. "Let me go talk to Dr. Rich and I will bring Claire to you. Unless you want to go in there."
He just nodded, "I want to go in there." I nodded my head as I helped my husband up and I held his hand as he walked back in there. His fingers running through his hair and when he got in there, I noticed Eve was also upset and Claire looked upset, but I think mostly off the energy. Troy was quick to her side as he went to distracting her with the coloring book as he pulled himself together. "Can I see?" I asked Dr. Rich, and he nodded his head as he pulled up the scans on his computer and I walked over there with him. "I was telling Eve; I don't think it's anything and if I was slightly worried, I would order more scans. I also told her that this can happen from time to time where a different spot just shows up and at the next scan it's gone. We never know what it is."
He was speaking for Troy at this point. I knew these things.
I looked at the scan and it was so tiny he had to point it out to me. "Troy," I called his name, and he lifted his head as I waved my hand to him. I told Dr. Rich to blow the computer screen back to the original zoom. "What am I looking for?" he asked blinking and I laughed, "Exactly, it's so small you can't see it unless we zoom in." Dr. Rich showed him, and I saw him exhale. "Can we do monthly blood work until her next scan? Just to make sure nothing is rising without us knowing?" I asked and he nodded, "Of course. We will keep a close eye on this. I am very reassured with her bone marrow and her blood counts. If it was cancer again those would more than likely be the very first to turn on us."
Troy just nodded, "Thank you," Dr. Rich nodded his head, "I didn't mean to worry either of you. I just wouldn't be doing my job if I didn't tell you and you read it in her chart instead." Troy nodded and I saw him relax a little bit. Claire stood up and went over to Troy as he picked her up and hugged her tight, "I love you, Claire." He whispered to her, and she squeezed his neck, "I love you more daddy,"
"Not possible, Claire." He whispered.
Eve and I shared a smile together because this was going to be okay.
Saturday, October 8th, 2022
Gabi's POV
Wren and Val were both snorting into their popcorn as we were talking about old stories, fun memories, and how much our life has changed in the past couple of years. "I heard about Claire's scan," Val said, and I smiled softly, "She's fine. Troy just heard spot and his brain went into the worst-case scenario. We looked at the scan, agreed to do monthly blood work until her next one, but Dr. Rich and I both think it's just a spot of nothing." I exhaled and shook my head, "But the panic on his face and the worry that something might happen to his daughter? My god, he loves her so much."
She gave a smile towards me, "Because he does. I think he loves you almost just as much. In different ways." I gave her a smile as we just chatted about life and I laughed, "His distractions really did help this week. I have barely thought about the maybe pregnancy during the day. It's the nights that are hard but sometimes I am so tried I just go to bed." Wren gave a soft smile, "I can't imagine waiting, have you taken any pregnancy tests?" I shook my head back and forth. "No, I haven't. I don't want, too. I don't think I could get myself to walk into that appointment if I had a shadow of a doubt, I wasn't pregnant."
Val hugged me from the side, and I took pride in having my friends with me. "What does he have planned for us tomorrow?" I asked and they both smiled as they told me all about the person doing hair and make-up coming over to pamper us before his game. I picked up my phone to see a text from him checking in and I shot one back. "Is giving him a second chance everything you thought it would be?" she asked, and I nodded my head, "Yes, he proved me wrong in every single aspect of my worries. He is such an amazing dad, an amazing husband, and wants nothing but the best for me. I want nothing but the best for him."
"That isn't a baby," Val quickly said as if he told her to say that and I swallowed on the shame, "I know but at the same time I feel like he just wants another baby. I feel like that is going to bring him happiness." Wren shook her head, "No, sweetie, you being happy is going to make him happy. He is going to make sure you are happy and if this gets too much then he won't care. That man loves you to the core of your soul." I just smiled and nodded, "A baby will make me happy," I whispered to them, and they both just hugged me.
"Then let's get you that baby, yea?" I just gave a half smile. "I think I just need Monday to be here. I just need to know. I hate this unknown time period and I just…I just pray Troy is home by the time they call. I can't answer that alone." Wren sighed, "I think he will run out of practice before he misses that." I just snorted because he would.
"How about on Wednesday – regardless of what the news is – we get together. Lunch? Dinner? Or just come lay in bed with you. Whatever you need." I just nodded my head because I didn't know what I was going to need. I didn't know what my mind set was going to be in those moments. We finished the movie that we were watching currently, and we all went upstairs as Ember claimed her spot on the bed. We all got ready and crawled into bed when Troy facetimed me. I answered and he smiled into the camera, "Hi baby, I see you all made into bed." I couldn't stop my laugh as I showed Val and Wren.
"Get comfy, I will see you on the field tomorrow. Eve is dropping off Claire at 9." I thanked him for reminding me as I set an alarm on my phone. I doubt I wouldn't be awake though. "Hey El," I looked at the camera, "I love you, try and get some rest tonight, okay? Just a few more sleeps." I smiled and nodded, "I love you, get your sleep. I demand a win tomorrow." He just chuckled and we hung up the phone. We all got cuddled up in bed and I inhaled. I was thankful. I was here and I was thankful.
Monday, October 10th, 2022
Troy's POV
I ran out of the practice facility to my car as they told her they would call at 4pm.
It was 338 and I was 30 minutes from the house. She repeated over and over again that she wanted me there and I had to be there for her. I shot her a text that I was leaving now, and I was going to be there. I called her and she didn't answer, and I cursed as I sped into traffic and worked my way around until I was going too far over the speed limit, but I didn't care. I needed to get to her. She can't get that news alone. Good or bad. She didn't sleep last night but I didn't sleep last night either. We talked and held each other, and we talked about my win yesterday.
She was there for me on Friday when we got hard, but good, news. The fact that there was even a minor thought that there could be a problem had me shaking in my boots. Yet, Gabi remained calm, and she took care of everything like she always did. She was the best at that. I called her again as I was ten minutes out with five minutes until they called. I tugged my lip into my mouth and this time she answered. "How far away are you?" her voice was barely above a whisper, and I knew she was worried. "Ten minutes, baby. If they call just have them call you back. I'm so sorry, Coach kept talking and I almost just left."
"It's okay, it's your job, I just…I am so nervous."
"I know, baby, I know."
I talked to her for a few more minutes but she wanted to get everything ready as she wanted to film it. My gut turned but she said she had been authentic through this entire process and didn't want to stop because it might be bad news. I flew the rest of the way home and when I got into the driveway I threw my car in park, turned it off, and ran inside. She was sitting on the couch with the phone in her lap, her camera running, and I inhaled. "Did they call?" she shook her head as it was 4:05. I sat down on the couch next to her and I hugged her tightly. I held her so close to me because who knew what was on the other end of that phone call? I inhaled and then exhaled deeply for her. She matched it.
"I'm here for you," I whispered into her ear, and she visibly exhaled, "I was terrified you weren't going to make it." I laughed and tapped her nose gently, "I was going to make it." She took a calming breath as I exhaled myself as my heart was racing but I gripped her hand as her phone rang. Both of our eyes flashed to it, and I squeezed her hand, "We got this. Whatever it is." Gabi looked at me and she nodded and took a deep breath before sliding the bar over. She put the phone on speaker phone as Gabi cleared her throat "Hello?"
"Gabi, it's Indy. How are you doing? Is Troy with you?" she asked, and Gabi laughed, "Okay, just in suspense. Yea, he made it home in the nick of time." Indy gave a soft laugh, and I closed my eyes as Gabi chewed on her nail as she held the phone. Those brown eyes flickering all over the room and then at the phone as it felt like it was taking forever. "We have the results of your pregnancy test, and I am so sorry, it was negative." I snapped my eyes open, and I looked over at her because did she say what I think she said? It's negative? She's not pregnant? No... Those brown eyes welled with tears, but she cleared her throat and moved forward because she's that fucking strong. My own tears slipped down my face as I stared at her. "Okay, what do we do?" her voice cracked at the end, and I tugged her into my side, but she shook her head softly and I just let her go for the moment. I knew that she wanted to lose it, but she wanted to have this conversation first. If I touched her – she would probably not be able to finish it.
I covered my eyes as I took several deep breaths as Gabi had a conversation with Indy, how? I don't know. "Gabi are you going to be, okay?" Indy asked her softly, her voice cracked, "Yea," it wobbled, and my own damn heart wobbled in my chest, and I knew she was moments from breaking down. "We are going to get you that baby, we will call tomorrow and schedule an appointment to go over what's next, you are so strong." Gabi just nodded this time and I just stared at her. My beautiful girl who was so fucking strong and beautiful who just…got the worst news after everything that we had been through. Gabi ended the phone call and I almost wanted to close my eyes because I couldn't watch this part. The heartbreak. I watched it once when we were 18 years old. I don't know if I could do it again. Watching her entire world crumple around her. Those hands went up to cover her eyes and she bent forward as she cried, and I tugged her closer to me. My hands pulling her into my side, and I just wanted to wrap my entire body around her. Her fingers gripped my arms. "I'm so sorry, baby," my own tears continued as she sobbed against me. I tugged her fully into my lap and she wrapped her body around me.
"What did I do?" her sobs echoed the walls, and I felt my chest crack. "You did nothing, baby. You did absolutely nothing wrong. You did it right, I promise," I squeezed her tighter to me as she just buried her face into my chest, and I buried my face into her hair as we both cried together. The grief of getting the wrong results, the unknowns of that baby we could have had, the sadness that we had to repeat the process. I swallowed and tried to push my own emotions away, but I couldn't do it. I couldn't stop as I hated watching her hurt so damn much. It felt like it was all against us right now.
I turned her so she wrapped herself around my body, "I'm sorry, Troy, I wanted this so much," I kissed her temple, "Nothing is your fault, baby. Nothing. Stop blaming yourself." I didn't move with her in my lap, and she didn't move from me. I don't know how long we sat like this, but it was a long time. She pulled away at one point and those brown eyes were so damn sad. "I'm sorry," I whispered to her as I brushed my thumb over her skin. "I'm really sorry, you did everything right. I love you so damn much, Gabriella."
She tried to talk but it was only tears, so she just wrapped her arms around me again. Her nose pressed into my neck, and I could feel the cool tears on my neck. "I really thought we were going to have a baby," she whispered, and I just closed my eyes to try and ward off the tears, but I replayed it in my head 100 times. "I thought I was pregnant." That sent me over the edge. "We are going to get through this together, baby. We are. We are going to have our baby, and this is just going to be a distant memory. Okay?" she just nodded but I knew she didn't believe me. Not today. I hated it. I hated this. I just wanted to fix everything.
…See ya in three weeks :-)
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Next Update: December 3rd