Chapter 21 Apprentice Animagus
In the end it was decided that Arcturus would divide his time between training young Sirius on Tuesdays and Padfoot on Thursdays. And he could participate in Thursday's activities unless it involved the future. Sirius explained to his younger self that the less he knew of the future the less he could mess stuff up.
That made a lot of sense, but it scared him too. His future self was not a happy soul. He was haunted and grim. Sometimes falling into depressed moods that he couldn't help but feel sometimes, even though Padfoot was really good about shutting him out. So good that there were lots of blank spots. Sometimes hours at a time were lost because Padfoot was doing god knows what with his body. But he promised not to shut him out like that anymore. At least not unless it was absolutely necessary.
Siri took it in stride because he was being included and Padfoot, as he had come to think of his annoying future self, was more careful about respecting his wishes. He was stunned when his grandfather informed him that he would be the one to teach him how to become an animagus and not his future self. Although Padfoot would help if he asked. As an Animagus himself, his grandfather's mentorship reaped huge benefits, besides the fact that Siri was learning to trust Arcturus.
He was beginning to appreciate his grandfather's wry sense of humor. His bark was way worse than his bite. Tonight Sirius would take the revealing potion and fall into a deep meditative trance where his form or forms would present themselves. This was complicated magic and most young wizards were incapable of it. The only reason he himself would be able to do this was because he was possessed by a master animagus, and perhaps also because of the ring ceremony.
That was so strange to think about. Most of the time he just didn't think about it. He was warned that being possessed was harmful. it wasn't healthy, and that Padfoot would at some point be gone, only to return at some point in his future. It all sounded very random and weird. He was fortunate that he was easily distracted. Ever since he had seen Padfoot's memory of James dying, things had changed. He just didn't know how much or how profound those changes were.
Death had always seemed rather abstract. He'd seen death. Just not of someone he loved, unless you counted Tiffy. Tiffy had been Kreacher's mother. She had served as his Nanny. When she had become too old to serve, his mother had her beheaded and mounted on the wall. She had forced him to watch as the hated MacNair had served as the faithful creature's executioner. That was a horrible memory. It was a memory both Padfoot and him had lived through. Padfoot still had nightmares about it, he told him. Siri did too. That somehow helped in a weird way.
Padfoot had offered to take the memory of James dying from him, and part of him really wanted it gone. Almost as much as he wanted his future self to move on quickly so he could live his own life without interference. But seeing James like that, had changed him. He had felt Padfoot's pain like he had felt his own. The shock of seeing his best friend dead strengthened his resolve. That future would NOT happen. If putting up with Padfoot in his brain would stop that from happening again, then so be it. He and Padfoot were both on the same side now.
But he had immediately refused to have the memory removed. Because now there was hope that he could stop it. Padfoot had given him a basic idea of what had happened. An evil wizard had targeted James. It wasn't important to know why at this time, but the Potters had been betrayed by someone they trusted and the evil wizard had killed him. The baby he heard crying was James' son.
Sirius didn't care to know any more details. He knew enough to know, he would do whatever it took to make sure it didn't come true. James would not die like that. He was already hatching a dozen plans on how to keep his friend safe. The only thing Padfoot asked was that he not reveal the truth to anyone. If it became known that he was possessed by a time-traveler, every person he loved would be put at risk. It was explained by Arcturus how the ministry would react. He explained how Dumbledore would react. He explained how his friends would react. It was sobering and not at all difficult to see how his very life depended on him keeping the secret. Even from James. Especially from James!
Arcturus's lecture about secrecy was still ringing in his ears. As much as he wanted to share his animagus training with James and Severus, Arcturus reminded him that they did not have the benefit of an animagus master sharing their bodies and the magic was too advanced for them. They would be ready by fifth year, maybe fourth year due to the conditioning of their bodies and magical cores due to Dawn Patrol. He would have to wait until then at least to even broach it. However it was possible, knowing James that anything could happen once he learned about Remus's furry problem.
Sirius shook his head and was still a little miffed about being kept out of the loop on that. Padfoot hadn't trusted him not to blurt it out in front of everyone and had kept his secret. When Remus had approached him in the dorm room when they were alone and handed him a letter for his grandfather to thank him for the wolfsbane potion, he'd exploded at Padfoot. Which of course brought about a lot of positive changes as far as he was concerned. Now that he knew he could help Remus.
Remus being a werewolf didn't bother him at all, it was the fact that his grandfather and Padfoot had schemed behind his back. He hated secrets. HATED SECRETS! And now ironically he was being expected to keep a whole boatload of them.
Arcturus assured him that when he mastered occlumency he would find that this aspect would be easier. He had been forced to study the mind arts as part of the Black family tradition. Every Black heir was expected to learn it. Even Regulus had to endure Occlumency lessons. The theory was that family business needed to stay family business and some wizards would not have a problem stooping so low as to try and pry those secrets from the minds of the weakest links. The children. And so Blacks for generations had taught their children to shield their minds almost as soon as they could talk. Even though he had some formal training he was nowhere near as strong an occlumens as say Padfoot. But ever since the ring ceremony that seemed to be changing. Magic had granted him a boon of magical protections. Arturus said it was part of the Heir rings power. Almost every heir who underwent the Rite of Ascension was granted this extra layer of protection. As long as he kept the ring on, it would give him some basic mental shields. His occlumency training would be beneficial in his quest to become an animagus.
The potion that his grandfather was providing for him tonight was a bright shade of blue. He was currently sitting in an overstuffed comfortable chair and his grandfather assured him he would remain close in case anything went wrong. Padfoot was being careful about not being too present. He didn't want to influence the outcome so kept himself in the background.
"Bottoms up." Siri drank the potion which tasted a lot like grass. He kind of liked it. He settled in getting comfortable. He closed his eyes and waited. He worked on clearing his mind, calming his fears, and settling his thoughts. Everything just sort of slipped away. He opened his eyes and saw to his surprise that he was in a heavily wooded area. He recognized it immediately, it was in the forbidden forest where Remus was told about the ring ceremony. Where Remus had been let in on the secret of Padfoot.
Trees were all around him and he sat on a fallen log. He was told to expect a bit of a wait. Animals were cautious. They took their time. It wouldn't do to rush them.
He had been preparing for this day for weeks now. Padfoot only helped if he asked for help. He kept out of his head as much as possible, letting Siri find his own way, he appreciated his older self's restraint.
The first of his Animagus lessons with Arcturus began with the older Black providing him with his personal animagus journal. He also took him inside a pensieve memory he had prepared. It was a group of memories that summarized his animagus journey. He got to see Arcturus's first successful transformation. He got to see how painful the process could be, which almost put him off the whole thing. It had taken Arcturus a year to achieve his first transformation, and then six months more before he could transform instantly at will. And that didn't even cover the time it took him to learn to fly. Flying was difficult. Gliding was fun though. He recommended if an avian form opened up to him that he first try jumping off tall buildings and gliding. Much easier than flapping your wings to achieve take off. Less painful as well. The point was made when he watched his memory of learning to fly which made Sirius laugh so hard his grandfather almost ended the memory right there.
He then gave him his own animagus journal. It was a beautiful embossed leather journal. Runes were etched into the leather. "I added privacy wards and notice me not charms, it will add pages as needed, and its password protected. You can set it to whatever password you want, and change the password as well. There is an indexing system." His grandfather explained. He had never received such a nice gift. He realized his grandfather was truly making an effort and he was really impressed. You will need this. Becoming an animagus is something that will never be easy. Magic has given you the opportunity but it always comes with a price. This. This takes hard work and time. You'll see what I mean when you read through my journal. Every person's journey is different. This is a path of self discovery, just as much as magic. If you don't understand your form, you'll never be able to change into it.
His grandfather's journal was a fascinating read. Siri began to understand why a journal was necessary. Within the pages he found endless sketches of ravens. There was raven poetry, references to ravens in literature. Stuck between pages were raven feathers. There were drawings of feathers doodled into nearly every page. There were observations and there were poems, and short stories about ravens and that was also where he found his grandfather's short story called Lost Souls Inn.
So Siri began his animagus journey and Padfoot stayed far away. When Siri took out his animagus journal that was Padfoot's clue to butt out. The next few lessons were about helping him strengthen his ability to reach a meditative state and that's where occlumency came in handy. They had brewed the revealing potions together during his last lesson. And now he was sitting on a log looking at trees and listening to sounds of the forest, trying not to worry that it was taking so long. His grandfather warned him that it might. He continued to employ his occlumency. Proving to any that might be watching that he could be just as patient as they could be.
He seemed to be sitting there for quite a while, just enjoying the last rays of the sun on his skin, the smell of pine and earthy smells and movement drew his attention upwards and saw a golden and red streak of flame across the evening sky. He stared transfixed as the beautiful bird came to land on a nearby tree limb. Proudly it preened its bright red and gold plumage. "A phoenix!" Sirius was enchanted. "Hello?" He spoke to the creature. He had heard that Dumbledore had a Phoenix familiar named Fawkes, but he'd never seen it. He reached out his hand gently trying to coax the bird closer and it flew to his shoulder and bumped its head gently against his cheek and trilled a gentle song that warmed him from the inside out. Suddenly the bird burst into flame and Sirius cried out afraid that he'd be burned, but the Phoenix flame was warm rather than hot. He would have liked to visit with him longer. Did that mean it had rejected him?
Padfoot sent a reassuring message letting him know that it didn't mean that.
Sirius got the feeling that he was being observed. He looked around the forest but couldn't see anything. But then his eyes saw the grass move just a bit and his gaze sharpened and he saw what the grass was hiding. A large snake was slithering towards him. He forced himself to sit very still as the snake slowly came within touching range and then stopped lifting it's head and he realized it was looking at him. The serpent was red with golden stripes, and was about as long as he was tall and as thick as his arm. Which wasn't that thick as he was 11, but still that snake looked big. He bent closer to get a better look. "You're a beautiful snake. What kind of Snake are you, I wonder?" He reached out gently, not really concerned that the snake would bite him, and gently the snake started coiling up his arm. He stroked it gently and could see the advantages of being a snake. He smiled. For a few minutes the two communed and then sadly it slithered away into the underbrush.
He waited for a bit longer when he once again felt like he was being watched. He peered into the forest and was startled when slowly a large black panther crept cautiously from the foliage. It watched him with almost an indifferent air. When it moved it was all grace and power. Sirius was impressed. The Panther had gray eyes, he realized. It gave a roar that sounded low at first and then raised in pitch to a scream. It made him jump. It was a very intimidating creature. It watched him warily and then slowly made his way towards the boy and they took their measure and then the big cat butted him with his head, and only then did Siri start stroking his midnight black fur. The big cat purred. Then sniffing him once, he stalked back to the forest.
He didn't know how he knew, but he did that the panther was the last animal that would appear to him and as soon as he realized it he was aware that he was curled up in the chair in his grandfather's study and not in a forest at all. He opened his eyes and sat up. "Whoa!"
Arcturus looked at him and said, "Welcome back, Did it go well?" Curious as the boy had been out of it for almost two hours and it was getting close to his curfew. He had begun to worry that he would have to fire call Professor McGonagall and inform her that Sirius would be late. He was glad he didn't have to confront the formidable witch, after all.
Sirius sat up correctly in his chair a little embarrassed that his grandfather had watched over him while he had been out of it. But he shrugged it off and told his grandfather somewhat excitedly about what forms he had seen.
His grandfather seemed quite shocked that an actual Phoenix form had presented itself to him, but Siri thought it made perfect sense considering things being the way they were.
The snake was a bit of a surprise and Sirius didn't know how to feel about that form, but he did have a slytherin side and the snake felt like a good fit. Plus it had Gryffindor colors so that was a plus in the Snakes favor as well.
The third animal made Sirius the most nervous. He wouldn't be able to change into a Panther without causing a panic. Wizards would curse him and muggles would shoot at him. He admitted to himself, but really wished he could see James' face if he turned into a panther in front of him. He didn't think he was ready to try for a Phoenix either for that matter. He didn't really know much about the mysterious bird and thought it might be difficult to study the anatomy of a Phoenix which he would need if he was going to transform.
Arcturus and Siri came to the same conclusion almost at the same time, "He wanted to try to transform into a snake. Especially this snake." Siri's excitement was infectious and even Padfoot finally weighed in and told him he thought it was a good choice as well.
Arcturus's praise however meant the most to Sirius. "Your choice of the snake tells me that you are a wise person who makes wise choices. Most of the time." The compliment warmed Siri from the inside out.
After that his grandfather sent him through the floo to his impatiently waiting head of house. On the way back to the tower it struck him. "He would become the youngest ever animagus." He grinned all the way up to the dorm and fell asleep with it.