2. A Leader's Honour

What had he done? Leaving them with Lotor? Keith wasn't even sure that Shiro would be able to see through the monster that he really was. This was all his fault. Krolia had insisted that they tell Kolivan first because this was important news, but he couldn't. Yes, it was good to know where that quintessence was stemming from, but would that have been enough for a monster like Lotor? What if he went after Allura or Coran's quintessence to try the same experiments that he had on the Alteans? And if that wasn't enough? What else could happen? Too many thoughts were fluctuating around his mind, and he wasn't sure which to address first.

"Keith," his mother's voice broke through to him, interrupting the flurry of intrusive thoughts that were too much to handle at the present moment. "I know you're worried about the other Paladins. I understand that. But we need to inform the Blades about how our mission went. They may also have information regarding the Paladins as well."

It was the last sentence that caught his attention. The Blades could have information on the condition of the Paladins. After all, Voltron was the most important one in this war.

"Right," Keith said, exhaling as he tried to calm himself down. "I'm sorry. It's just…" He wasn't even sure how to explain his feelings to his mother. He was the leader of Voltron. The team was his responsibility. But he had been reckless once again, acting out of emotion rather than what was the best for them. He had to fix this. He had to stop being this reckless when they were counting on him because it would only lead to more disaster.

Krolia shook her head. "Don't worry. I understand. But we can't afford to be reckless given we know how dangerous Lotor is now. The Blades are the first people we should inform as they will keep it quiet on the information they have and also find a way to warn Team Voltron without Lotor being made aware of this."

That was true. Confronting Lotor directly would be far too obvious. Especially given he and Allura were getting closer when he was leaving. Keith knew Allura would trust his word over Lotor's even though he had no proof but at the same time, he also couldn't risk her getting hurt in all of this. It was a little too late for that, but he could redeem himself, he could get a second chance.

He moved to turn on the comms and contact Kolivan. It rang a few times before Kolivan answered.

"Blade of Marmora headquarters, Kolivan speaking," Kolivan spoke firmly.

"Kolivan, it's Keith, we found information on what the unusual strand of quintessence was," Keith said immediately, jumping straight to the point. "It was Lotor. He's not who we think he is. He had a whole colony of Alteans. He was using their quintessence for his own experiments. He burnt a child alive whose quintessence he had already drained. The others aren't safe around him."

Kolivan was quiet for a moment and the silence made Keith's heart sink. Did they already know? He could see even Krolia frowning at this which meant something did not settle right with her either. That was not good. Had something already happened to the other Paladins?

"Lotor is not the only one you can no longer trust," Kolivan finally said. "Shiro has turned on the other Paladins."

Keith felt as if his world had stopped then and there. That…what was Kolivan talking about?! Shiro would never turn on the other Paladins, no matter what happened. He knew that. He knew his brother.

"Kolivan, that can't be," Keith argued. "Shiro's my brother. He would never do that. Lotor or Haggar must have taken control- "

"Haggar may have been involved as the footage does have a wormhole appearing and Shiro disappearing into it," Kolivan admitted. "However, you are also correct about Lotor, even if you are quite late to inform us of that."

Keith felt like everything was spinning too fast, like the world was moving at too quick a pace and it was something he just could not keep up on no matter how hard he tried to. There was too much to take in and he had to take a few deep breaths. In. Out. He needed to stay in the present moment. It was what the others needed him to do. He had been selfish – running away, running away without looking deeper into why Shiro had been acting strange. He wanted to get rid of the competition that had arose between the two of them and found the best way to do so was by leaving. Why in the world had Black chosen him? When he was just going to be a failure?

"Maybe I'm late," Keith said quietly. "But I'm going to fix this. This was caused by me, at least indirectly so I want you to tell me everything you know, Kolivan. Where are the other Paladins? I know Shiro's probably with Haggar." He forced his voice to remain steady as he said this. He had already failed Shiro. He couldn't focus on that, or he wouldn't be able to focus on how to clean up this mess he had caused. He wasn't a little kid anymore. If he made a mess, Shiro wasn't here to clean it up. Not this time. "But what about Lance? Hunk? Pidge? Allura? Did Lotor hurt them?"

"Lance, Hunk and Pidge are injured but otherwise safe, no one else has attacked them yet," Kolivan explained before sighing. "But from the feed we received from the Castle of Lions and the Blue Lion's last location, Lotor attacked Coran and went to get the princess. Because she still trusts him, she went with him willingly. After all, she believes Shiro betrayed her. She does not know Lotor has as well."

Keith nodded, keeping the mask of his emotions. "We need to save Allura. But I can't do it alone. I'm going to need Black and the other Paladins." He exhaled. There was one way to get in touch with Black. They still had a connection – one he might not deserve right now but it was something he had. He closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. Patience yields focus. That was Shiro would tell him. 'Hey Black. I know it's been a while. I'm sorry for falling out of touch for however long it's been for me…it's been two years for me, and I know that makes it even worse. Can you hear me?' That was it? That was all he was going to give his partner, after he had abandoned her? Maybe Black really did have the worst luck, getting partners like him and Zarkon. She was likely hurting anyway from him going quiet for so long. I keep hurting everyone that I don't want to hurt. Black's the last one I want to cause any pain to because she's definitely been through more than anyone should have to go through. Please Black. Please reply to me. I promise I'll make up for everything, but I can't do that alone. I need you.

'Keith?' Black asked quietly. 'You're too late already, I think. Everything's gone to hell, and I don't even know what we can do. Shiro…he's completely under Haggar's control. He doesn't even recognise me anymore.'

Okay, mind control. He could deal with that. He could handle it. It also made a lot of sense. Shiro had been different since he had come back, almost aggressive at times in a way that he couldn't really explain. Having just assumed it was the trauma from everything he had been through, Keith had thought it was just manifesting from that. His heart sunk even further. He had not paid attention to his brother; he had not been there for him when he had truly needed him. Shiro's always been there for me and the one moment when he needed me to be there for him, I wasn't.

It explained Shiro's behaviour a lot more than he had thought. Shiro would never talk over him or cut in through his decisions. It wasn't his way. Even when he felt that Keith was doing something wrong, he'd take him aside and quietly talk to him about what he felt wasn't quite right at the moment. It brought an odd sort of warmth and iciness in his stomach at the same time. His brother still wanted him – but at the same time, he hadn't noticed that something was wrong. That something about his brother was very off and now Shiro was a prisoner.

'Will you help me, Black?' Keith asked his lion, pushing down the turmoil inside of him. He could beat himself up over all of this once he had his family back together. They were scattered right now and that made them vulnerable. 'I need you to stay close to Shiro, protect him until I can find you. I need help from the others to find you and I know I can't find Shiro by myself. I finally understand what Shiro was trying to tell me all along. We're always stronger together.'

'I will, Keith. I'll do my best. But it's so strange being back here' Black admitted. 'Everyone here… they look at me as if I'm…' Hearing the discomfort in her voice made Keith's heart ache a little. It must be awful for her being a prisoner and being treated like that, but it was only for now. He wasn't going to let her stay there much longer.

'I won't let you be with them much longer. You…you believe in me, right?' Not that he had given her much reason to. He hardly believed in himself right now so maybe it wasn't the best question to ask.

'Of course, I believe in you, Keith' Black responded gently. 'I know you never abandoned me because you wanted but instead because you felt you had a greater calling. But you're the leader Team Voltron needs right now.'

Keith couldn't help but smile slightly at that and nodded. "Then believe in me now. I'll make everything right, I promise."

"Keith, are you alright?" Krolia asked softly as the space wolf licked his hand. Their closeness made him feel a little better, but his heart still felt quite heavy.

"I'm okay," Keith said softly. "But my team isn't. How can I be completely fine until they are? I need to gather the lions and the Paladins."

"Then I have good news for you," Krolia said simply. "We've managed to locate the Green Lion."

Keith's heart lifted at that news. It was the first good news they had in a while and while it would not solve everything, even finding one Paladin meant they were one step closer to coming together. Shiro and Allura both needed them to be, and he would make sure of it.