"I know they're a bit grumpy about our living situation, but your parents seem to check in on you pretty often, I'm impressed, given the size of your family, that they can keep up with all you girls."
Konata yawned, it was midnight and her night off, and she had to spend it in an apron and rubber gloves taking care of the dishes.
She made dinner that night so the duty should have fallen to Kagami, but work beat her down hard that day, so she figured she'd do her good deed of the month and let her take it easy. Kagami gazed back from the couch.
"Well, it's not like they're very long calls, and it's the least I can do, I already feel guilty enough not giving them a son-in-law and all.", she sighed, shrugging for dramatic effect, "Working up the corporate ladder has them happy with me."
"I don't see how it's worth the fuss anyways, Tsukasa is likely gonna give them more grand-kids than they can count as soon as she can, y'know…"
"Actually hold down a relationship? Is that what you're about to say?" Kagami pretended to focus on her book to hide her snicker towards the rare flustered Konata at being perfectly called out.
"I'm sure it's really hard to pick the right guy, she's a darn good cook and has a stable job, it's just a matter of time…"
"Just stop pretending. Time to suck it up, we sucked with men then and we suck with men now. Well, aside from us, I guess."
"Unless we suck with men so much we wound up with each other by default! Like if you fail to trigger any flags at all, so there's an exclusive ending so you don't feel too bad!"
Kagami laid both arms over the edge of the sofa, giving a tired glare at her girlfriend. Were she not being permitted a lazy night, she'd be more aggressive.
"Thanks for sharing how much you value our relationship."
"You're too negative! A lot of times those exclusive endings are the best ones. Besides, I get to tease you and you always take the bait. It's the best outcome for me!" Konata sighed, idly rubbing her sponge along a dish long-since clean.
"And what about your Dad? I figure he's still kicking, even you're not cruel enough to hide if he was sick or anything."
"Oh yeah, Pops is fine."
"Well, that's a relief, has old age finally gotten him to calm down a bit? He definitely left an impression...He seemed happier when we hooked up then you were."
Konata's ponytail swung to her side, finally finishing setting the stack of dishes to dry.
"Oh Hell no! 'I only have so long until the Monstrous ED kicks in! So I gotta go after all the girls I can get! Your Dad is on a timer, Konata! A dangerous, dangerous timer!' He dedicated my old bedroom entirely to doujinshi and lewd figures. Still a Writer though."
Kagami's disgust was self evident.
"He really said that, huh? I hate that I can hear it in his voice, too…"
"I really don't think he has much to worry about," Konata looked towards the ceiling in thought, "With how amorous he's always been, I think he'll be dead long before erectile dysfunction can touch him."
"We just ate, can you please not make me think about your Dad's-!" Konata caught the angrily lobbed water bottle from midair and kicked it into the bin.
"Such a weak stomach, this is my Dad we're talking about, I'm the one that should be uncomfortable!"
"And yet you aren't, and that's what worries me!"