10 • But baby it's cold outside~

Danzō didn't appreciate my report for my first day out. Que adding more lessons to my schedule. But hey, at least now I know how to 'properly' give a report as well as what's 'proper' to include. (How stating that I couldn't find a solution to his hideous self wasn't 'proper' I will never know, shouldn't the man at least get to know that he'll forever be ugly?)

Either fucking way, the Land of Fire has now turned into the Land of Snow. And I have gone from a malnourished and abused child to a malnourished, abused, and freezing my fucking ass off child. Apparently this is also training, I have to get used to harsh weather as a shinobi. Which I call complete bull, bitch I ain't even in the fucking academy yet.

At this rate I'll probably freeze to death instead of starve. And I would have too! Every three days I get to go out and meet the two brats to 'forge better bonds of friendship' at the park, and since we're like three we have supervision. As in Itachi the Emo Princess and Shuisi the Sushi.

Everyone knows you have to start adding layers when the weather starts getting colder, it's common sense. And I kept coming in shorts and shirts because that's all I'll be provided apparently. Hell, even Naruto has sweaters and pants! (As in the Hokage finally doing his fucking job even just a little.)

The point is, Shisui was confused and concerned like any person would be. He asked about it and I lied like the pro I fucking am, and said, "Haven't seen the motherfucker in like three months, out on a mission or something, I don't know and don't care. Hell he could be dead in a ditch and I'd celebrate."

After lecturing me about family and the life of a shinobi and all that other shit, he talked with Itachi before leaving. Then came back with bags. Bags filled with clothes, and not any clothes oh no, pink clothes.

"You perverted pedophile. You sicken me. Have you no shame?" I immediately say after looking in the bags.

I called over Naruto and had him switch with me, I completely ignored his complaints about the color which stopped as soon as he put them on. He then wouldn't stop talking about how warm the clothes were and never have I wanted to murder the Hokage more than in that moment.

I had slung my arm around his shoulders, "And if anyone gives you shit about —"

"What's that?"

"It means talking bad or making fun of. Now if anyone gives you any shit about your new clothes you tell me so I can punch them in the face, kick them in the balls, throw them down a flight of stairs, beat them with a bat, and —"

"And that's enough," Sushi interrupted.

I flipped him off but stopped listing the ways I'd hurt someone. Jokes on him, that was my first list for a civilian. Ha!

That was all a week ago. I've been going out for about a month now. And still no new clothes, simply because I'd give them to Naruto or some other kids I find. I also know that Dino wouldn't let me keep any of it so why bother?

Right now I am being lectured by my personal tutor on the past wars. It's really just a summary seeing how I'm still pretty young and probably been declared stupid. I mean, they aren't wrong. I can be a dumbass sometimes, more so in this life considering my self-perseveration has been eliminated.

The summary includes a lot of talk of Kumo being assholes though. Something about stealing? I mean, it was war. Ya'll be murdering each other and you're worried about stealing? The fuck?

I don't know man, the stealing is being mentioned a lot and I'm sure I'd know why if I was paying attention. It seems somewhat important now that I think about it.

Anyways, after this I have group training again. I can now take down those that are three to four years older than me. I lose more than half the time and always use under hand tactics but still. Progress.

From there I go to the Nurse's Office and try to chat up Kabuto. I still have yet to gain a response but he does nod in greeting sometimes. I also have yet to get any reaction from him. No matter how I insult him or joke or tease, he won't react! At this rate I might have to mention the orphanage when I talk to him about my days out.

Don't worry, I may be an idiot but I'm not stupid. I don't mention any names or even my nicknames. There's a high chance I can't get to him before the Snake Pedophile and I don't want to be the cause of my own fucking downfall. I also make up more than half of the shit I tell him. So really, it's not so much as telling him my days off but just some stories to see if he'd react.

Which he fucking doesn't. Hate to admit it but the kid is better than me. Then again, he like five or so years older than me. But I'm the one with like, over twenty years of experience!

"Lord Danzō has called for you," my tutor announces making me blink. I look around for a moment, remembering I'm supposed to be in a lesson.

"What? Why? Don't I have training after this?" I ask annoyed.

Another thing that's gained some progress. I've slowly stopped my shouting and angry remarks at the Masks and Danzō. My swearing has lessened around them, I'm trying to make them think I'm slowly beginning to listen. I'm pretty sure that if this keeps up, then I'll get to be able to know all of Danzō's secrets and be allowed to run missions.

I'm completely ignored as my tutor becomes my escort and takes me to see the ugly man himself. I glare half-heartedly the whole way, too tired to put much effort really. I'm shoved inside Dino's office once we arrive making me glare over my shoulder at the man who shoved me.

Turning around I see Danzō sitting at his desk as always. Though I can't really call it sitting since he's in seiza position. He gestures for me to sit across from him and I can only make myself look slightly annoyed. Depending on how long this meeting will be, my legs will be numb at the end.

After I sit, there's silence for about two or three minutes. He's testing me I know but really, why call me over just to have me sit in fucking silence?

"Kumo is sending some representatives over to discuss and sign a peace treaty," he begins and fuck, are we at war and I didn't know? Shit, is this what was being discussed during my lectures? Fuck, I should've paid attention. "The date for the signing is also the date of the Hyūga's Heiress' third birthday."

Oh. Oh fuck, more like. How could I forget about this? This is the reason that one guy is such an asshole until getting the shit beat out of him by Naruto.

This is why stealing was being covered so much today. Kumo is kinda known for trying to steal the eyes of Konoha's Uchiha and Hyūga since they're such sore losers for not having any kind of clans.

"I find it suspicious but of course that old fool doesn't see it as such," he continues. I've noticed that he really doesn't like the Third. Which I mean, same but that doesn't mean I try to assassinate the old man. He'll talk about how much of a fool Hiruzen is given the chance.

I resist the urge to interrupt him and tell him to get to the fucking point. I'd be sent to the room for insubordination, again. I can only stare boredly and annoyed as he continues his little rant about him being Hokage.

I almost scoff and laugh when he brings up how old the Third is. Like, what the fuck? If you think he shouldn't be Hokage for his age then neither should you. You ain't no fucking immortal or Orochimaru who looks like he's in his twenties even though he be sixty.

And at least the monkey wants to try to be peaceful, you just want war. 'Make Konoha Strong Again' — Yeah fucking right. With the war you'd bring, you'd be making it weak with the amount of manpower we'd lose.

Fuck, I might as well be Hokage.

Danzō may have experience in being a leader but he doesn't know how to take care of his men. Tsunade is one of Sannin sure and I'm pretty sure she was a leader of a platoon during the war and she's a medic, but she's also an alcoholic and short tempered. Kakashi wouldn't be too bad if it weren't for the fact he's lazy and more than likely wouldn't do any of the paperwork as well as wouldn't want the responsibility of all of Konoha on his hands. The boy is traumatized after all.

"You have yet to meet any of the heirs, is that right?" Dino asks making me look up to meet his eye. I shake my head. I've only meet Sasuke, Naruto, Shisui, and Itachi. It's guaranteed for me to meet the other brats once the Academy starts. Any other important (and canon) characters will have to be on my own.

"What do you know of the Hyūga Heiress?" He asks, leaning over to stare at me.

"She isn't allowed outside of the compound from what I've seen. I've since glimpses of the other heirs outside, though never without one of their guardians. The Hyūga heiress is the only one I've yet to see," I explain with a blank face and monotone voice. 'Only speak when spoken too and prompted' has been a lesson literally beaten into me.

He doesn't do anything with my information seeing how he already knows this. He only stares at me making me want to punch him but I don't move. Dino does this when he's making a plan. I hate the absolute fuck out of it but have learned I'll need to deal.

"The day of the signing will also be one of your days off. Instead of having you return at sundown, you'll be on patrol," he begins as he leans back.

Patrol. The fuck. If this is going where I think it is, then does this fucker actually think I can take on a man thrice my height, age, and level? Give me a gun and maybe I can but even then I'll probably die.

"You'll stick close to the area around the Hyūga Compound and be on the lookout. The Hyūga won't be attending the signing to celebrate the Heiress's third birthday," he explains as he pulls out a file and lays it on the table. "Kumo is sending their best man for the signing. He'll be smart to attack after the signing, late at night when the Compound is asleep. The Hyūga also have a rule of not using their Byakugan inside the compound."

"If Kumo has information on the Hyūga, then they'd know about the seal they have made to keep their branch members in line and bloodline. The Kumo nin will go after the heiress if they know this," he finishes while opening up the file, probably reviewing his own information on the Hyūga.

Well fuck, no wonder little Hime was kidnapped. Not only is she a child, therefore easier to transport, she's also the heiress. Kumo should know about the seal all branch members have. Only the main house doesn't have it, making them be able to obtain the Byakugan.

It's stupid on the Hyūga's part you've got to admit. If the main branch also had the seal than their heirs wouldn't be kidnapped because then it'd be useless for Kumo or anyone else to try.

"Haruno Sakura, ROOT Number eighty-six," Dino states in his 'I'm the boss' voice. I straighten up to show I'm listening even though I'd really rather slouch and just fall over dead. And I have a number now too? Or was that always a thing and I just never knew? Or maybe I am supposed to know but just wasn't paying attention. "This will be your first mission."

Huh. Forget what I said earlier. Looks like I get my first mission at three, not seven or ten. What the fuck is this man on? And can I never get some.

ʕ •̀ o •́ ʔ

First mission is pretty simple right? I'm just on patrol around the Hyūga's Compound, nothing suspicious at all. Especially not being tucked away on a branch just several yards outside of the Heiress's bedroom window. Nope, completely normal.

I'm getting fucking shanked if ever discovered. Why did the old guy think it'd be a good idea to place me here? And patrol, really? Yeah fucking right. The Dino fucking wants me to catch the guy. He didn't say it but I just fucking know it.

Didn't even give me anything to work with! Oh sure, my clothes have been upgraded. No more shirts and shorts for me! I've now been promoted to long sleeves and pants. Because that's the proper way to dress when it's fucking snowing.

I can at least be a tinsy bit glad he isn't a father. Or— oh fuck, what if he is? What if he knocked up some chick back in his younger years? Shiiit, what if he's a grandfather and fucking knows it but is too much of an asshole to meet the fam and is just keeping tabs!? Or hell, maybe he has a grandchild and kidnapped them to put them in ROOT and told them he was their grandfather so they have to be loyal!?

Fuck, back up. Can't think about that shit. Need to focus. A kidnapping is about to occur and I can't be thinking about Danzō's possible family. Another time, not now.

Today started as any other day out. I was escorted home and from there I went out. Though, like my first day out, I took a knife and multiple rations with me. Since you know, Danzō the Dino didn't give me shit. The hell does he want me to do? Catch the guy bare handed and unarmed?

I huff quietly and watch as my breath turns into fog in the cold air. I shift around as quietly as I can, trying to find some sort of comfortable position. I settle for crouching, one hand settled on the branch I'm on and the other on the trunk of the tree. It's also dark as fuck so there's that too.

I'm going to get frostbite at this rate. Can't that Kumo nin hurry up and kidnap the kid already so I can kick him down? My legs are going to go numb from this and then I won't be able to stand and take some form of action.

I narrow my eyes at the trees before me as the night commences. Sun had already set a good three hours ago. Yeah, that's how long I've been here. Arrived just as the party ended. And I'll probably be here for another two hours or more. The guy really can't get here fast enough.

Oh, have I mentioned that I'm the only one here? Yeah, no backup or anything. Apparently if the kidnapping does happen then Danzō doesn't want to be questioned on why his men were hanging around. And since no one knows I'm considered one of his men, and way to fucking young, then he won't be questioned. Me, on the other hand, will be.

And you know what he said to do when that happens? The fucker said, "Don't mention anything of the mission, nor hint at working for me." That's all. The fucker has practically given me free rein to what I say!

Refraining from cackling, I roll my shoulders back as I squint in the dark. The nin should be here pretty soon. I'll need to be ready in the case that he doesn't come this way. I'll be really fucking pissed if he doesn't, I haven't learned how to tree hop and chasing after him will be a chore.

I almost curse when I see something move in the dark. I slowly begin to stand as I squint even more. With all the trees around, I really can't see shit. But I'm pretty sure that shadow is moving and it's my guy. Oh good, he's coming this way.

I'll need to time this right. I want to be able to land on him when I jump. Hopefully I can hit him in the head at the same time. It'd be best to blind him with my hands and try to choke him with my small three year old legs —

Oh fuck, he's fast! As Spider-Man once said, it all just a leap of faith! And this bitch ain't got much faith!

I jump at him as quick as I can, thankfully landing on him even if I'm hanging off his arm. He grunts in surprise and looks down at me. He looks completely surprised which I mean, who wouldn't? Wouldn't you also be surprised if your were just attacked by some flying three year old?

He tries to throw me off by shaking his arm but I manage, some fucking how, to hang on. And now comes the task of climbing to reach his head. Which is really fucking hard seeing how he's still fucking running and shaking his arm.

At this rate I might just have to stab him even though I kinda want to avoid that. I really don't want to be questioned on carrying a kitchen knife around again. I can bullshit my way out of explaining the rations because they're fucking rations but a kitchen knife? Sushi may have let me off but the Hokage himself? Fucking doubt it.

I grunt and grip on tighter as — let's call him Cloud — Cloud tries to slam me into a tree. I can only roll my eyes and sneer. This is getting annoying and now I want to stab him despite the future consequences.

Instead I manage to grab a ration while still holding on and chuck it at him. He actually fucking stumbles. I fucking tell you, that shit's as hard as a brick. Either way, I use that opening to try and climb my way up. No such luck.

Instead I somehow ended up hanging off of his shirt and pants. But this is okay. It works actually because now I'm face to face with his knife pouch. I grin as I tighten my grip around his shirt and let go of his pants to grab one of his weapons.

I don't hesitate in stabbing him in the leg. He grunts and trips, but still keep moving. Clicking my tongue in annoyance, I rip the weapon out and stab him in the torso, just next to where I'm hanging on to. He only chokes on spit from what I can see.

"Persistent fucker, aren't you?" I mutter as I rip the knife back out and move to place the handle between my teeth. I begin trying to climb down his leg, occasionally cutting him as I went.

He's slowed down so it makes it a lot easier to drop and grab his ankle, stabbing the weapon all the way through his foot, the sharp end coming out from the bottom of the shoe. He doesn't necessarily scream, it's more of muffled and choked out shout.

But he does trip and fall, dropping the brown bag — which I most certainly did not forget about, nope — with the little princess in it. I let go as he begins falling, and try to roll away. I grunt once I stop myself and look down at my leg.

I think I broke something. Shit. Glaring at the downed and bleeding Cloud, I look for the brown bag. It isn't far from me thankfully, but still somewhat close to Cloud. With gritted teeth I pull myself up and limp my way over.

I drop down next to the bag and poke it. The little Hime inside squeaks and moves about. Okay good, she's still alive. I begin opening the bag and peek inside to find her looking at me with wide and teary eyes.

"Hey, it's okay," I call out softly, "It's going to be okay. I've got you. Come on." I didn't want to tell her she's safe because that's something I can't really guarantee. She seems to nod and slowly climbs her way out of the bag.

She immediately spots her kidnapper and whimpers, clinging on to me. I can only blink and try to soothe her. I keep my eyes on Cloud as I try to stand back up, Hime always standing behind me as she clings to my shirt. At least I have my hands free and working. I can throw rations at him this way.

I try to quietly console Hime into slowly backing away so we can put some more distance between us and Cloud. She's trembling but at least she can still hear me and nod. We begin backing away slowly, a lot more slowly for me since my left leg is fucking useless.

Cloud is slowly getting up too, glaring at me in the dark. He's on his knees now, trying to get his leg to listen to him as he tries to stand up only to fall back on his knees. Which thank fuck since Hime's father decided now would be a good time to show up. He jumped down from the tries between us, quickly taking in the situation.

He's quick to knock Cloud unconscious. If Cloud was standing when he showed up then I have no doubt that he would be dead right now instead of just sleeping. From what I can somewhat remember, Hiz- or is it Hai?, umm, Hime's father killed the dude and then his twin died in his place to be sent as compromise or something like that. And then Hime's bro- no, cousin, became a jackass.

And oh hey, look at that, canon has been fucked once again.

"Hinata!?" The father calls out turning back to face us. He narrows his eyes at me suspiciously so I stick my tongue out to him and pull down an eyelid. He looks even more suspicious but also disgruntled at my lack of respect.

Hinata looks up from behind me, crying out, "T-Tou-San!" What's surprising is that she doesn't run out to him. Oh no, instead she clings to me even tighter and begins crying.

"Uh, hey, it's okay now," I say softly again, really not sure what's going on anymore. "Your dad is here now, you're safe now," I try to slowly make her uncling but she only cries louder and tightens her hold. I give up after my fifth time trying and huff, turning to her father.

"She won't let go," I state the obvious, ignoring his pinched expression mainly because there are now ANBU here. What the fuck man.

One of them walks over and tries to grab us, probably to separate us but Hinata screams making me stiffen and act on instincts. I pull out a ration and chuck it at the ANBU that made her scream, aiming low. Glaring, I put myself in front of the little Hime some more.

"Try to fucking touch her again and I'll be sure to string up you by your fucking balls," I threaten, another ration already in hand as my other one keep a steady hold on Hinata's arm.

He backs away as does everyone else. Only Hinata's father tries to move closer but I guess the sudden movement and dark scared her cause she whimpers and hides her face into the back of my shirt. He frowns, looking worried and hurt but backs away.

I narrow my eyes at all of them but turn my attention to the little girl clinging to me. I resist the urge to sigh and call out to her instead. "Hey, Hinata, right?" I ask, trying to coax her. "You can hear me right?" I whisper. She nods into my back. "Can you look up for me little bunny?" I ask and feel her hesitantly nod. I look over my shoulder so see her peek up.

I smile at her reassuringly as I can, "Look, it's your dad. He's really worried you know, even if he seems like too much of a prick to show it. You're safe now, you know? These other people?" I point to all the ANBUs, making her look over them all. "They won't hurt you, promise. They only look scary because they're actually all really ugly under the mask."

One coughed, I fucking know what I fucking heard. And one coughed. I swear it.

"R-Really?" She whispers, peeking over my shoulder even more as she gazes at the Official Masks. Pretty sure one of them twitched. I nod to her and she steps out just a little.

She then spots her kidnapped again and whimpers just a little as she points a shaky finger to him, "A-And h-him?"

Looking over I notice one of the ANBU over looking Cloud. Probably don't want him bleeding out. Oops. "Oh don't worry, he won't get up any time soon," I grin at her with a steady pat on the back, "I stabbed him in the foot after all. Oh and your dad made him go to sleep for a while."

Her eyes widen as she gazes at me in...awe? Is that awe? "R-Really?" She asks and I nod making her whisper, "Wow." I guess it was awe.

"Now, can you walk little bunny? Are you hurt?" I ask, getting back on task. She nods then shakes her head. Okay, can walk and is uninjured. Her father sighs in relief from where he stands and looks to relax a little.

"Is it okay for one of the ugly people to come over? They just want to make sure that you really aren't hurt," I ask. She looks up and tightens her grip on me but nods.

One of the Certified Masks walks over and I can tell they're a medic by the red badge on their sleeve. I step a little to the side to let them check over the little bunny as I stare at them. They look familiar. It's the mask that's tripping me up but I'm sure…

"You fucking hag," I whisper to myself as I refrain from glaring. It's the damned Nurse Mask! The lady that'll break one of my bones every time I walk in before fixing me up. I didn't think Danzō would have the medic as his spy.

I don't like this. I watch carefully as Nurse places her hand on Hinata's forehead. Her hand lights up green in medical chakra. The Hime is still clinging to me but now I make sure that I have a firm grip on her as well.

I don't trust what's going on. I don't trust Danzō. I don't trust that he wouldn't be planning something else and not tell me. After all, this is no longer canon. Who knows if Danzō actually tried something in canon but was stopped because Hime's father was there and carrying her.

I watch Nurse's hands more than I watch her movements. I watch as her green chakra wavers very slowly, blue almost unnoticeably taking its place. I pull little bunny away and lift my other arm in her place. I glare as I push Hinata behind me.

"The hell you think you're doing lady?" I sneer as I glance at my raised arm. It's numb. I can't feel it at all, the same way one can't feel still air. I can feel the muscles in it twitch before disconnecting like a plug from the nervous system and dropping limp.

I don't pay much attention to the adults around me as they tense up and twitch to move forward, the small crying of one Hyūga Hinata stopping them.

Seeing how my left arm is now fucking useless like its leg counterpart, I shift to have my right side more to the front. My right hand already teaching under my shirt for the kitchen knife I tucked away.

"Checking Hinata-sama for injuries," Nurse responds quietly, monotonously.

I raise a brow at her, expression blank and unamused. "That's a fucking lie and you know it," I say as I pull out my knife and hold up to her, sharp end pointing at her throat. "Now, I'll ask again, what the hell do you think you were doing lady?" I ask calmly.

I'm three and about to have my first kill. No, not even. I'm three and about to tussle with a fucking ANBU — with a fucking adult. Talk about stupid moments and decisions.

I don't get a response, well, not a verbal one at least. Nurse strikes out with her hand, trying to grab the knife from me. It's only on instincts hard learned as both Anna and Sakura that I strike out instead of dodge. I manage to cut her arm before needing to back up.

Luckily, I don't have to fight her. As soon as Nurse struck, the other ANBU were already moving to grab her. Hime's dad then moved to grab his daughter and I. I tried to politely tell him no by slapping his hand away but he wasn't having that apparently and just picked me the fuck up. Then he ran for it.

Hinata was curled in his right arm, face pressed against his chest. I was just kinda in his other arm, chest and up leaning over his shoulder. From where I'm being held I can see the mini fight pretty well.

Pretty surprised to see a familiar silver hair that breaks the laws of gravity. Kinda forgot he was in ANBU. I wonder if he remembers me. Kind of doubt it but hey, it's only been three years.

I'm just meeting a bunch of people today aren't I?

ʕ •̀ o •́ ʔ

Hinata's father, who's name I still can't remember, took us to the hospital. All three of us are currently in the same hospital room, with Hinata and I sitting on the same bed. She refused to be separated from me more than five feet. I kinda shrugged and let her hold my hand.

Her father, who I'm just going to call Prick — or maybe Constipated? What about Stone Cold? Ah, but then what would I call his twin? They should have matching nicknames. Damn, this is difficult.

Either way, Temporarily Prick, sits on the bed next to us. He keeps looking over Hinata as if she was just going to randomly combust. I've tried coaxing little bunny into talking with him but she'd refuse. She'll answer me but not anyone else for some reason. Children are weird.

Seeing how we're at the hospital, I was able to get my arm back to working order and my leg fixed but still wrapped (but only after glaring down the doctor). It's kinda weird since I've gotten somewhat used to just having my major injuries like broken bones healed completely if not close to it. Goes to show how many times my bones are broken.

It did get me thinking. My entire left side was fucking useless. Is that how Obito felt with his right side? Just worse? Is this part of the reason why he went insane? Because his entire right side was fucking useless like a dead fucking carrot?

I abandon those thoughts (for now) as I turn to look at the door when it opens. I'm not surprised to see to the Hokage. I am surprised to see Kakashi though. Well, ANBU Kakashi but still. The hair gives it away.

Prick stands up and bows as Bunny-hime looks on curiously, hand tightening around mine. I can only raise a brow and sigh heavily. I turn my attention away from the old monkey and instead try to teach Hinata how to play the hand game Slide.

We were playing our third game (she was still learning and messes up pretty quickly) when someone coughs. I don't pay any mind to it 'cause this is a hospital. Of course there are going to be the sick and dying. It does make Hinata lose though. She pouts but quietly demands a rematch.

We got up to number six when someone actually says something. "Sakura," the old monkey calls. It makes me lose so I turn a narrowed gaze at the man.

"What?" I ask rudely. I'm fucking exhausted. It's like midnight or even passed that, I played a mean game of tag and tackle with the boys, I crouched in a fucking tree for who knows how long, I took down a fucking Kumo Nin, saved the Hyūga Princess twice — I don't want to deal with this man's bullshit.

"I just have a couple of questions for you and Hinata-sama," he explains in what I'm guessing is supposed to be his grandfatherly tone. Makes me want to throw up and just delete myself.

I groan in annoyance and tug at my hair in frustration. "Fine but hurry up. I'm fucking exhausted," I snap, ignoring the shocked expression on Prick. He looks like he's about to reprimand me but Hiruzen raises a hand to stop him, the one good thing he has ever done.

"Language," He reprimands himself, making the one good thing be tossed in the garbage. He gazes at me sternly while still emitting a welcoming aura.

"Sleeping robes old man," I retort while rolling my eyes. "Don't you fucking forget you old shit, but I'm a suicidal little bitch ready to die at any fucking moment. I could care less about my own life." Not really but saying otherwise wouldn't really help my case. Plus the fact that he saw me jump out his window with the full intent of dying.

But now I kinda feel bad. Kakashi stiffened once I mentioned being suicidal. He's still only like eighteen or nineteen, he's still just a kid. And here I am being a fucking asshole bringing up suicide to the boy who's father committed suicide. Damn.

Hiruzen pins me with a stern stare but I just raise a brow in return. He frowns a little but changes his attention to little bunny and smiles. "I just have some questions, afterward you can go back home," he explains to her. She nods hesitantly and moves to be closer to me, grabbing my hand again. "Can you please explain what happened?"

I stare at him like he's a dumbass because he is. What kind of question is that? That's so broad, what the hell does he expect from the child? A full on shinobi report? Only one of us can do that and it's not her, and quite frankly no one knows I can even do that. I hold back a sigh and look at the girl curiously.

She's frowning and looking down, almost like she's on the verge of tears. I grimace and poke her softly. She looks up and yup, those are tears in her eyes. Okay fine, whatever.

"You don't have to talk to him if you don't want to," I comment quietly, making everyone look at me. Surprisingly no one tries to speak up to stop me. "You can talk to me instead, how about that? It can be like a game too!"

She sniffled and wipes her tears, "G-game?"

I nod and offer a smile that's probably more of a grimace than anything, "Yeah a game. Like Twenty Questions but different. I ask a question, you answer then you ask me a question and I answer and ask a question. You want to play?"

She thinks it over for a moment but nods. I nod back and shift so we're facing each other - so she's facing me with her back to everyone else and I face her and everyone else. I grab her hands and make them form fists.

"Okay, this is how we'll play," I start, clenching my hand into fists as well. I place one fist on top of the other. "Who's ever fist is on the top will be asking the question in the beginning. So, here, give me your hands. I place my fist down first and ask a question, then you place one of yours on top to answer and ask. Then I place my other one on top to answer and ask. And we keep going. It'll be like building a tower with our fists. The game goes on until one of us can't reach up to continue the tower anymore."

This isn't actually what the game was first designed for, not that I know what it was designed for, but it'll work. I look to her to see if she understands and she nods. Okay, I'll call this Question Tower for now.

Question Tower, commence!

I place my right fist on the space between us and begin, "When did you wake up?" It's vague so really she can answer with the time she woke up this morning, but I pin her with a reassuring gaze so hopefully she'll answer with when she woke up during the kidnapping.

She bits her lip but places one of her fists on top of mine, "W-When I f-felt s-someone grab me," she whispers but I can still hear it so therefore everyone else can too. I nod when she looks up at me. "Um, any q-question, r-right?"

If I was playing anyone else and with a different setting I would have counted that as a question. Instead I nod at her and she purses her lips, thinking.

"W-Why did y-you save m-me?" She questions, staring at me curiously. I blink not really expecting getting interrogated in return. Oh well, at least like this I can build up my lie. I place my other fist on top of hers.

I chuckle sheepishly, "Ah you see, I didn't even know he had you." That earns me surprised and suspicious looks. "To me, he was just a foreign nin that woke me up. But I'm glad I could save you." They don't look to buy it but are keeping quiet. "What happened after you woke up?"

Her other fist was placed on top, "Uhm, it was d-dark b-but I remember h-he tripped? B-But he was still m-moving. Then...uhm, he s-slowed down. Uhm, he s-screamed and th-then I was f-falling an-and then y-you p-poked me? And th-the bag o-opened." She lets out a shaky breath, I nodded any time she hesitated for her to continue on.

As she looks down I look up to the adults and raise a brow, silently asking if that'd be all. Hiruzen seemed to get the message because he nodded back but still sat back. Okay then, looks like it's my turn for an interrogation.

"W-woke up?" Hinata asks, surprising me.

"Aha, yeah. I got locked out of my house so I decided to go find a tree to sleep in since Kizashi is out on some mission or another," I shrug as I place my fist on hers. "The guy woke me up with his running. I uh...kinda fell off my branch and landed on him." I chuckle sheepishly again. "What's your favorite color?"

She blinks, probably surprised at the turn of the questions but smiles. "P-Purple. What's y-yours?"

"Hmm, I can't decide between red or black," I answer which isn't a lie. Black clothing hides blood better but red is the color of blood. "Animal?"

"R-Rabbits. You?"

"Oh that's tough. I like tigers though. Food?"

ʕ •̀ o •́ ʔ

The game went on for another twenty-minutes where I lost, Hinata just a little bit taller than me. At first she didn't want to leave so I gave her half of my ration stash and explained the proper way to use them.

"You just throw them at people. You can throw it at people that are bothering you or you can do it for a distraction and run, or you can even do it for fun, like I do!" I explained while handing them to her. "With men, remember to aim low. With women, remember to aim near the middle and top. And no matter the person, always aim for the face first."

Her father tried multiple times to stop me by trying to interrupt and grabbing the rations out of my hands. I always just took another one out and kept on explaining. Not even Sasuke and Naruto looked as awestruck as Hinata did. She left holding five as she made her father carry the rest.

That's where we are now. With me laying down exhausted with the Hokage sitting next to the bed, Kakashi standing guard by the door. No one has said anything after little bunny left with her father.

I honestly have no clue what they want from me.

"You stopped the medic from checking on Hinata-sama," Hiruzen says.

Oh. That's what they want from me. How could I forget? Now that I think about it, what did they do with her? I hope they didn't let her off. The bitch put my left arm out of fucking comission.

"I saved Little Bunny," I state, sitting up and narrowing my eyes. "That bitch numbed my fucking arm. And not because I moved Hinata, it was numbed because I replaced Hinata with my arm. Would you like to explain what would have happened had she been allowed to numb Hinata's head? Because I don't think anything good would have happened."

He doesn't respond and there isn't any sort of reaction from Kakashi. He had lost his grandfather aura once Hinata left. At least he's learning that it won't work with me or make a difference to my attitude.

"How did you know?" He asks next.

I hold back a heavy sigh and instead let out a small breath. How do you explain that you've seen and experienced medical chakra enough times to know when it isn't being used to heal but hurt?

"I don't know much about medical chakra," I start off, staring on boredly. "What I do know, however, is that medical chakra is green, unlike visible chakra which is blue. Though I can only guess that the color would and could be varied with different people and the like," I wave my hand about as I sit straighter to try and get my point across, "But medical chakra is always green."

I look to Kakashi, looking him over for a moment before shrugging. He was there, he was watching, he would be my key to being left off the hook. He's my witness.

"I don't know the full extent of medical chakra, but the bastard, Kizashi, knows some medical chakra himself," which isn't a lie. Back when I was still living with him, around last year actually, he had showed it to me. "He made it clear that medical chakra can be used to hurt as much as it can he's used to heal."

"I was wary. Hinata was scared and only trusted me at the moment. If she was hurt, it'd be my fault because I said she could trust them," I state, clenching my fists on top of my knees.

I look the old monkey in the eye, "Medical Chakra is always green. And in that moment? It wasn't green. It turned blue."

Taking in a deep breath and I let it out slowly as I relax my shoulders. I need to sell this. Need to get them off my case. If I'll die either way, I'd at least like to die messing up Danzō's plans. Can't do that if I'm discovered, if I'm put to interrogation, to jail.

"Hm, I see," he murmurs while leaning back. "Why were you in the tree? Why'd you attack the nin?"

Aw fuck. The harder questions.

I frown at him, "Like I said, I got locked out of my house so I went looking for a tree to sleep in. I found one and fell asleep. The guy woke me up with his running and I fell out, landing on top of him and hanging on. It was weird that he didn't even stop, so looking up I saw he wasn't Konoha and carrying a bag."

"He was a foreign nin on the run with something over his shoulder, and I just happened to be hanging on," I cross my arms, "What'd you expect me to do? Let go and have him kill me? I'm suicidal, not looking to be murdered. I want to kill my self, not have someone else do it," I scoff at him.

"At least with me hanging off one arm and something occupying his other, he wouldn't have been able to hurt me much. He did slam me into a fucking tree though," I grumble annoyed.

"I was slipping when I threw a ration at him, hoping to get him to pause long enough for me to get a better hold. In the end, I just ended up hanging onto his shirt and pants. I was close to his pouch so I pulled out one of his one weapons and used it against him.

"I stabbed him in the leg first but he kept going, so I stabbed him in the torso. Tripped but didn't fall. I was close to letting go so I did and grabbed him by the ankle so I could stab him through the foot. Went down like a tree," I snicker. Get it? Cause this is Konoha.

Sighing, I lean back, "He dropped the bag and I fell, that's probably when I broke my leg, and rolled away. I was curious about the bag so I limped over and poked it. Imagine my surprise upon hearing someone crying. Then imagine my surprise finding someone my fucking age inside."

I yawn and stretch, making a show of my exhaustion and age. "From there Hinata's father showed up and knocked the fucker out. And then your masked people came along. I'm sure you know the rest." I'm so fucking tired, when is this shit going to be over?

He hums, just staring at me in clear thought. In the end he thankfully (and unfortunately) stands up (and smiles). "I see, thank you for answering my questions. I'm sure you're exhausted, you can stay the night here and tomorrow I'll have someone help you get back home," he says while leaving, offering a 'good night' just before the door closed behind him.

And guess the fuck what?

"Why the fuck are you still here?"

He fucking left Kakashi here.

"If this about that Cloud Nin escaping some-fucking-how, then shouldn't you be guarding Hinata?"

No fucking response.

"She's the heiress right? I'm just a civilian and have no regard for my life. She's more important, I am not."

Silence.

"Another attack on her would be bad. Me? I'd probably just end up as a corpse, no biggie. Really. It's not. I'm not looking to be murdered but at least I'd be dead at last."

I need him to leave. I was given very strict instructions to return back at the house to be picked up so I can get back to training after giving a report. I haven't been in the room for almost a whole month now!

The kid isn't giving me anything. He's just standing there, keeping guard. No movements of any kind, no sound at all. A fucking statue is what he is.

"If this is about being suicidal then you don't need to worry. I ain't offing myself till I'm at least thirteen."

I got shit to do when I turn eight. Got shit to fuck up when I'm like twelve and thirteen. And guess the fuck what? They revolve around little duck.

Huh, no wonder canon him was such a stuck up thinking the world revolves around his duck ass.

"Still nothing?" I mumble. Running a hand over my face in frustration I flop back on the bed. Closing my eyes and crossing my arms, I try to sleep. "At least I get a full night's sleep out of this," I breathe as I begin falling asleep.

Danzō can't get mad at me if it was all Prick and Monkey's fault right? One brought me here and the other left a guard. But what about Nurse? Completely for-

Motherfuck—

ʕ •̀ o •́ ʔ

It's like one in the morning. I don't..*deep breath**exhale slowly**grin like the fake i am*

Hope you enjoyed!

ABOUT BNHA :

Okay so, I've decided to write both BNHA Fics, the OC one and the Twin one.

Both Fics are posted so go check that out.