Winter's Refuge

Chapter One Hundred and Five

JED 'KID' CURRY

As the sun rose further, I felt I was still bein' watched. I sat near the fire and poured myself a cup of coffee. I let my eyes search before I stood up and stretched. Nothin'. All around me was quiet, even Fall's Glory. And then I saw him, a bald eagle perched on a branch to my right. He seemed to know when I saw him, turnin' his head to stare at me. As we locked eyes, I knew he had seen right into my soul. There was attentive wisdom behind his fixed observation. He sees the real me, not the pretender tryin' hard to fool a town into believin' he was a good man, a good citizen.

"You know what I am, don't you?" I asked him, softly.

Shakin' his head to the side, he froze me in his gaze. Feelin' naked as his eyes searched mine, he ruffled his wings, but I sensed his approval before spreadin' his majestic wings and soarin' into the sunrise. I watched him rise and fall through the air until he disappeared. But he left me with questions. Was his approval of the man I had become or the fact that I know what I am and work hard to get better. I thought about it the better part of the mornin' ride.

HEYES

I haven't been alone, really alone, in a long time. Riding to North Dakota by myself, I talk to Fall's Bells and she's a good listener. Of course, I'm alone in my room at home, but this is different. I can't open my door and hear my family around me. The darkness stayed at bay last night. It still felt like the Kid was going to walk over and sit down next to me at the campfire. The last time I was truly alone was in the dark cell in prison. I once spent four months in there with the door opening once a day to leave food and dump my honey pot. I stood with my hands on the back wall then and dared not turn around to make human contact or else the billy club was used. And it inflicted pain that was immediate and lasting.

Now, I'm alone but there is a world around me. And I can spend an hour looking at the glorious sun streaming through the trees and on the meadows. And I race down the road laughing as the stampede strap on my head prevents it from flying off. Bells is having fun. I can feel it in her unrestrained strides. I have never felt so free.

LOM

I tried to tell Susan gently, but she complained loudly about the ordered bed rest. Dr. Arden warned me again before he left that she needed more sleep and to stay off of her feet. When I accompanied them to the train station, we left Susan sitting up in bed reading a new book.

"Thank you for coming, doctor," I said, shaking his hand.

"Lom, I'm serious. She's pale and having spells of dizziness. If she wants to carry that child to term, she must stay in bed. Maybe an hour or two spent sitting up in a chair would be allowed. She's a stubborn woman." Those were Dr. Arden's words as the train was pulling out. He'd told us Chrissy was due in six weeks but if this was like her last two pregnancies, he expected baby Curry this month. After she delivered, they'd come back to Porterville and stay until our little one was born.

I checked in at the office. Junior Bickson has been my acting deputy for the last few months. He was leaning back in my chair, feet up on my desk, thumbing through a pile of wanted posters. The boy has the biggest feet I ever seen and he was just starting to grow into them. His feet jumped to the ground when I entered.

"Sheriff, sorry, I was…"

I smiled. "It's alright, Junior. I saw you going through them posters. Just next time sit at the desk proper so people don't get the wrong idea about their sheriff department."

"Yes, sir."

"Any problems?"

"Mrs. Ferris was in here. Said someone is stealing one chicken a day from her coop."

"She's had eight chickens in that coop ever since I've known her. Not one more. Not one less." I could see Junior was confused.

"She's forgetful but more so she's lonely. Did you tell her you'd look into it?"

"No, sir. I told her you would look into it."

I patted him on the shoulder as I leaned over and took the mail and some of the wanted posters. "Deputy Bickson, you took her complaint. I think you should stop by there on your way home. If there's a hole in her chicken coop, fix it. But mostly, talk to her. She's pretty interesting."

"Yes, sir, but if there are always eight chickens in the coop…"

"She's a cherished citizen of Porterville, boy. And she'll offer you a piece of pie. Accept, she's a great cook."

He was seeing the advantage of stopping at her place. "I'll do that. Do you think she makes apple pie?"

"No telling what she made today but they're all good. And mark your calendar, she'll be back again in three days complaining someone stole a chicken…and if she don't, you ride right out there and check that she's alright."

When I got home, Susan was no longer in her bed reading serenely. She was nowhere in our house. I know where she is. Angry because she's not following Dr. Arden's orders, I stomped over to the bank. Walking straight to the president's office, I opened the door without knocking.

"What are you doing here?" I growled at Susan.

She smiled that wide innocent smile. "I can sit here just as well as at home." She sounds as if she is doing nothing wrong.

"How did you get here?"

"Walked slowly so there was no chance I would trip."

Angry, I stomped on over to our doctor's office. Too mad to knock, I went in, looked around, and saw his wooden chair on wheels with handles so it could be pushed. "I'll bring it right back," I said to his nurse, waving to her as I wheeled it out the door.

"No! I'm not getting in that chair. That's embarrassing. What will people think?"

"I don't care. If you won't take care of yourself and our little one, I will."

Ignoring the look on her face, I picked her up and placed her gently into the chair and before she could object, I pushed her out into the street.

JED 'KID' CURRY

It feels good to be home even though there is so much work to do. Been thinkin' about Chrissy as I rode home. She's come so far from that scared woman I carried out of the prison in Colorado. I've loved her since the day she boldly rode into Devil's Hole lookin' for her brothers. I don't understand how she loves me so much, but I have no doubt she does. There's nothin' I wouldn't do for her. Her healin' hasn't been straight or easy but she's a fighter and I tried to fight right with her. A hard part was when she confessed that she had laid with Heyes when they thought I was dyin'. I had known, of course, Lom had broken it to me. He also had given me the way to understand it sayin' it was for comfort, not passion. I used those same words to Chrissy. And I declared that the twins were mine and it would never be discussed again.

Learnin' Heyes had memory holes, as he called them, I tried to figure out if he remembered bein' with Chrissy. Now I think that was bein' selfish. It does not matter. The twins are my children. But Heyes doesn't remember anythin' about it anyway. That's for the best.

Then I started to marvel how much Heyes has healed since that day he found he had his amnesty if he could stay in the prison's general population for six months and do six months' probation. Before that, he couldn't stay out of solitary for a week. He couldn't talk, his thoughts weren't clear, but with Aiden's help, he made it. I'd like to think I had something to do with it. I did everything I could to help but it seemed like so little…until he broke his parole and confessed to it. I was so proud he admitted what he did. He didn't have to. No one would have known.

I went to prison for the night to earn him back his probation and amnesty…and almost died. But it was worth it. He's doin' so well. Don't know that I agree with the reason for his trip, but I'm so proud of him for takin' it on alone. I know his route. All he has to do is telegram and I will be there. While ridin', I realized how much I need both Heyes and Chrissy. They both have told me they've used my strength to heal. But I haven't healed. Prison haunts me every night in my dreams. I'm convinced I will end up a prisoner again someday. I look around at the people who have befriended me, and I'm amazed they want to be friends with me, an outlaw, an ex-convict, a killer. But their friendship is showin' how I want to live and I'm gonna work hard to make sure Chrissy, our kids, and Heyes are protected and have everything they need. Includin' love.

The twins were interested in the flirtin' between Miss Duhamel and Heyes. But he ain't interested in her. He did confess to me he'd like to settle down at Phoenix with a wife. But not someone young and naive like our school teacher.

The second night headin' home I was preoccupied. I'd thought of another variation on a lock that could be used on a bank safe. I spent the evenin' and late into the night designin', then rejectin' tentative drawin's. So finally, I just made notes of how it would work and tried to be as precise as I could. Heyes will know how to design it and then I'll make it.

HEYES

I'm glad to be reachin' Pembina and I think Fall's Bells will be happy to spend some time in the livery there. I've been traveling over a week and I'm lonely. I miss the Kid. I miss our family. I miss people around. I had a good laugh when I realized that. I've spent the last two years cherishing privacy. But I used to like nothing more than the noise and smell of a full saloon of strangers. Except, of course, for the Kid at my side. I never worried about being safe when we were together. I've sent a couple of short telegrams home so they know I'm okay. And twice I've ventured into small town saloons. I told myself that's where I could find a cheap, decent meal that I didn't cook myself. But it was really for the company. Tonight, with Bells settled and a bath, I ate in the diner down the street. I'm hungry but I'm listening to see if I hear any mention of Veronica Doubleday or her two sons. But I didn't, so I bought a newspaper in the small mercantile and found the telegraph office was in the back of it. There were two letters waiting for me. Smiling, I put them in my pocket to read in the privacy of my room.

I had planned on writing home, but I can't wait for news of home, so I settled sitting up in my bed and opened the first letter…and smiled. It was two drawings from Michael and Martha. I remembered the hope the guard's child's drawing had given me when I was injured in prison.

The first was a stable in our barn, I think, and a little all black horse with one white foot. I couldn't tell if the foot was supposed to be black and Michael just forgot to color it or the horse had a white foot. I don't remember any of our horses marked like that, or the visiting mares either. Printed at the bottom in big letters it said, "I miss you Uncl Heyes. Come home soon, Michael Curry." If I wasn't set on my quest, those simple words would have brought me home quickly.

Still trying to figure out which horse it was, I unfolded the second drawing. I had no doubt who this was supposed to be. It was a woman with child. Martha gave her stick legs and arms, but I knew it was a picture of her ma. She signed it in neatly printed letters. "Uncle Heyes, I miss you reading us stories. Love, Your nice, Martha." The word nice instead of niece made the letter even more dear. I missed them, too. The Kid and Chrissy are good parents, and their kids are raised with love and family around. I'm glad I get to share in that.

It was a few minutes before I folded the drawings from home and carefully put them back in their envelopes. I knew the second letter was from the Kid.

"Hi Heyes,

I ain't much good at writing letters, but a lot has been going on around here that needs telling. Wishing you were here every day to bounce things off of but I'm real proud of what you're doing.

Well might as well start at the beginning. Miss Susan has been feeling poorly. Lom was worried about her and their expected baby, so he asked Aiden to go to Porterville and examine her. Miss Denise went with him. We thought he'd only be gone a day or two but they stayed near a week and were gone another week visiting his brother Dr. Oliver Arden in Cheyenne. He put Miss Susan on bed rest but she's fighting it, he said.

Well anyway, while they were gone one day when I took the twins to school, I saw lights on in the doctor's office. No one should be in there. Aiden left a medical bag of supplies with Frank in the sheriff's office in case someone needed it. So, I decided to check it out. The door was unlocked so I went in slowly, gun drawn. And who do I find sitting behind Miss Denise's nurse's desk going through some medical charts but Dr. Sexton. Yes, that Dr. Sexton.

So, I said to him, "What are you doing here?"

Startled, he dropped the papers. "Well, since that quack doctor, with the newfangled methods that bought this place from me, has now abandoned it, thought I'd move back in and give this town the doctoring they need. Heard your wife is with child. I'll be by to check on her."

Heyes, I was so surprised I couldn't do nothing but stare until he said, "You can put that gun away. I know you are an outlaw but a gun is not needed in most situations."

I resisted the urge to spin my colt before I holstered it. "Dr. Arden hasn't abandoned this office or this town. He and his wife are visiting one of his patients in Porterville."

And didn't he tell me that Porterville has their own very good doctor and no one there would need the quack. I wasn't sure what to do so I took him over to the sheriff's office. He didn't want to go but I rested my hand on my gun and that made him come with me pretty fast.

As we were leaving the office, didn't Mrs. Crenshaw come in with her youngest. Sexton had ridden by their place on the way in and said he was back in town.

I told her, "Ma'am, me and the doctor have to see the sheriff right now. You can wait here."

Well, you know Frank, partner. He's don't take no nonsense. He gave Sexton a choice, to leave town and never come back or go to jail for breaking in the doctor's office and trespassing. Sexton grumbled a lot. And asked Frank why he believed a sneaky low down thief like Curry that Dr. Arden had plans to return.

Frank's a good friend. Whether he believed it or not, he told Sexton, that I was one of the best men he knows and he'd fight any man that said different. Felt real good to hear that. Maybe I'm starting to prove to some people that I can be a good citizen. With a huff, Sexton said he knew where he wasn't wanted. And when that quack Arden's so called modern methods killed someone, don't come running to find him. And with that he left. Frank sent Aiden a telegram asking when they would be home.

They were back two days later bringing sad news. Aiden said Susan is having' a hard time with her pregnancy. He put her on strict bed rest like Chrissy but she's not taking it seriously. Lom's doing the best he can, but he can't watch her all the time. Aiden's very worried…and their local doctor doesn't support bed rest.

So, talking about bed rest, Chrissy's doing well. Sometimes I carry her downstairs to the couch so she feels part of the family activities. But a couple of days ago I carried her to a bed of hay in the stable. One of them mares that Jose sent us after he got his amnesty, Summer's Night, had a colt. She's sleek black and just about the calmest sweetest mare we have and her delivery was just like that too. Chrissy was thrilled to be there for the birth. Michael, Martha, and Auntie joined us, too. Like her he's black except he has one white foot and streaks of white in his tail. Chrissy named him Aengus's Summer after the Irish god of love. Martha immediately nicknamed him Gus. Michael said he was going to draw you a picture of him. As much as Chrissy enjoyed watching little Gus come into this world, it tired her out. She fell asleep in the barn and I carried her upstairs and put her gently on our bed. Well, her bed until the baby comes. I'm afraid I'll hit out in my nightmare and hurt the baby. She woke up and asked for water. When she said 'good night' she added, "Auntie right, calm mother, calm baby."

Riding home I got a great idea for a new safe lock for a bank but I need you to put the design on paper so I can make it. When I made your lock with three keys when you were in prison, it took me three months to get the design right. I know you could do it in a few days.

Everyone sends their love. Write when you can, partner. If I haven't told you, I'm proud of you doing this on your own.

Jed."

I could hear the Kid's voice as I read his letter. I wonder what this new bank lock looks like. I enjoy it when we work together on something. It was always like that. I always got the credit, but it was the Kid's suggestions and practicality that made the plans perfect. We knew the truth and he always said it was better that no one else knew he helped.

I'm glad that Frank stood up for the Kid and even happier that the Kid didn't just discard the comments as empty words. I been trying to help him around the ranch, but I think I need to do more. We need to talk like we used to. He can see through me when I'm conning him into doing something. But he knows when I mean something, too. I need to make him see all the good he does. And improve his self-worth. He told me on this trip that he's sure he will end up back in prison sooner or later. That it's just his fate. I won't let that happen…even if I have to take his place.

Kid's letter made my hotel room feel like home. I could feel my family around me. So, I moved to the table and started a letter home. This was a good time to write of my trip here. Tomorrow I will start looking for Veronica Doubleday.

JED 'KID' CURRY

When he returned, Aiden came out to Phoenix to check on Chrissy. Miss Denise came with him and went upstairs to visit with Chrissy while I showed the doctor little Gus. He's a stunnin' colt, with a gentle temperament. A goat got into the big stall he shares with his ma. We tried to take it out, but Martha insists that Timber, as she named the goat, thinks he's a horse. Since Summer's Night didn't mind, we left them together. I need to remember that for Heyes' next letter. Aiden brought a telegram from Heyes in Pembina, North Dakota. It was short.

"Arrived Pembina. Starting quest tomorrow. Enjoyed letter and pictures. Letter coming. Heyes."

Chrissy put the telegram in a little wooden box she keeps on our dresser.

"I'm worried about Heyes. This is a long trip and he may not find these women," she confessed to me that night. I had crawled in beside her to hug her and gently laid my hand on her stomach. Each time the baby kicks, I'm amazed.

"Yeah, but he felt he needed to do this. Even though it was self-defense, he ain't never killed a man before."

She moved my hand from her stomach to her cheek and studied my eyes. I know what she was goin' to ask. She wasn't goin' to like my answer even though she knows I killed Bobby Bell and Mark "And you have?"

"A few that deserved it." I saw the disappointment in her eyes.