Odianna looked down at the sobbing child before her, perplexed beyond belief. She had watched Pan fight a bloody and savage battle and, she had to admit, she had been impressed by how much the girl had made that Saiyan suffer. It had pleased Odianna greatly to see Aneurin's murderer bleed. Though, it had conflicted with her fury over seeing Pan fight just like the Saiyans they had once fought together against.
But at the end, something just... went wrong. Back when Odianna had encountered Pan before the tournament begin, she had detected a strange difference in the girl's ki from when they had last met. Her ki felt like a swirling maelstrom, it was strange, it gave off no feelings or emotion. But, at the end of the fight, she HAD felt something from Pan, a violent and unstable change to her ki that made Odianna feel unsettled. Then she saw that look on Pan's face and that emptiness in her eyes as the girl walked passed her proud family and friends. They had said they were proud of her, but she walked passed them like she didn't even hear or see them.
Odianna didn't know why, but, when the girl's family decided to give her some 'alone time' and did not pursue her, Odianna felt compelled to follow the girl. She had learned long ago to trust her intuition, and had obeyed it. She had gone down her own Dimension's hallway, crossed hallways, and then followed the girl into the bathroom. She had seen the girl smash the mirror, utter the word 'Bata' with a tenderness that made Odianna wince, and then to her shock, tried to kill herself. In that split second as the girl put the glass shard on her wrist, Odianna struggled to decide what to do. She could freely admit to herself that she hated, and yet cared for the child at the same time. It was a confusing muddled emotional mess that she hated to deal with. It had been so much easier to just envision Pan as a treacherous, lying, Saiyan wench, but then she had talked to the child before the start of the second round, and found her illusion of the girl crumbling and reverting to what she used to think about the girl.
She wasn't honestly sure she could actually bring herself to one day kill the child for the Saiyan tainted bile flowing through her veins, but regardless of that, what Pan had been about to do felt wrong. She had been tempted to let it happen, surely the dragonballs could bring her back or the gods would just revive her. But, Pan's suicide attempt screamed DANGER to Odianna. For some reason it set off every single danger sense in her body, mind, and soul, in a manner that she did not understand. She knew it wasn't some motherly instinct or because she used to be friends with the girl. For some reason, she knew that if the child died, something BAD was going to happen. It had been a sense of foreboding Odianna had never felt before.
She had stopped her, and now found herself at a loss of what to do with the child. Should she just leave her here? Maybe go get Aideen since they were friends? Go get her parents? She frowned at the ideas; the girl was a warrior, if she was seen like this, it would damage her. Odianna could respect a warrior's pride enough not to do that to the girl. Though, by trying to take the cowardly way out of whatever issue she was having, she didn't seem like much of a warrior at the moment. She was also confused as to WHY it even came to this point. Why in the world would the girl try to kill herself? It made absolutely no sense to her. The girl had seemed strong and content one moment, then just snapped, then after the fight, she had just... broken. It was bizarre.
"Why...," whispered Pan.
Odianna broke away from her thoughts and glanced down at the girl. "Why what?"
"Why did you stop me?" Pan asked weakly, "You hate me... despite everything I did for you, despite that I would have died for you, died for Aideen, given my life in exchange for Aneurin's, died for the world of Terra, you hate me... so... why did you stop me? I don't... I don't understand..."
Odianna went cold at those words, it felt like a dagger had just been driven through her chest. She stared down at the child, who wasn't even looking up to meet her. There were very few things that could make her feel shame, and Pan's words were an echo of what Aneurin once said to her...
Aneurin turned to face Odianna. "Just let them go."
Odianna looked at him in disbelief. "Excuse me?"
"Beaten as I was, I was conscious to watch that fight. Pan might have been a Super Saiyan, but she was fighting for us! They tried to get her to join them, but she refused, you heard what she said, she's not like them. She was an innocent little girl who tried her hardest to help us, and you heartlessly tried to kill her," Aneurin said coldly.
Odianna flinched at the memory. She couldn't honestly find any good reason to justify trying to kill the girl, only her own bitterness and hate. Bless his departed soul, Aneurin had been right, as much as she didn't want to admit it...
"Why didn't you just let me do it?" asked Pan bitterly, "I'm a failure... I'm always letting everyone down... always letting others get hurt, or die, because I'm to weak to do anything... I'm a horrible person... I'm just like the other Saiyans..."
Odianna furrowed her eyebrows and looked at the child with disbelief. What in the world was this trash flowing from her mouth? She frowned intently, more than aware she was missing a lot of information as to where this self-loathing was coming from. She wasn't unfamiliar with the notion of suicide or self-destruction, hell, she had tried a few times when she had lost herself enough to forget that she was immortal. She had also seen it enough throughout her life in others. Usually though, there were reasons for it. It just didn't come out of nowhere.
She wasn't honestly sure if she could, or should, try to do anything for the girl, but if she wanted to, she needed to know more. She hesitated briefly before she knelt down in front of Pan and put a hand on her forehead. She had used this technique to interrogate Saiyans before, but did her best to be less... brutally invasive... as she broke into Pan's memories. It was surprisingly easy, unusually easy, even considering the girls mental state Odianna. It was almost as if there were already pathways to be used...
She shook off the thought and decided to get some background on the child as to whom she had been before coming to Terra. She started sifting through her memories, some of the earliest ones being around the age of four. One early memory in particular was incredibly vivid and powerful in the girl's mind, the moment her grandfather had given her a turtle hermit gi. Odianna raised an eyebrow at that, seeing the little version of Pan pretty much flip out with glee at receiving the treasured gift. Well, guess that explained why Pan had such a strong reaction when she had received Odianna's old gi. She had unwittingly triggered a powerful memory and reaction. It was strange though, if this memory was so powerful, why had Pan discarded her Turtle Hermit Gi mid fight? That didn't add up...
Odianna kept on going, noting the child's early form and finesse. She couldn't help but scoff quietly to herself. The four to five year old version of Pan had been more in-practice and skilled than the eight year old one she had first encountered. Her lack of training, due to schooling as Odianna took note of, dragged her down considerably and...
Odianna froze, sighting a memory that went shivers down her spine. She temporarily forgot about Pan and focused on the memory: Son Goku used a transformation she had NEVER seen before. Long hair, no eyebrows, a deep voice, emitting power that the little version of Pan couldn't wrap her tiny mind around. What did they call it? She searched around a little to get her answer: Super Saiyan 3. Odianna was livid. Every fucking time she thought she had reached a new pinnacle, the Saiyan race always caught up and surpassed her. Even with the training she had put herself through in the time chamber, mastering the Kaio-Ken in ways even the gods themselves had never imagined, she wasn't sure she could match this power. Her new trump card, she wasn't sure even that would be enough for Super Saiyan 3. Odianna grumbled and then resumed her search, continuing on and...
She went numb, sighting yet ANOTHER new transformation. Blue, Son Goku and Vegeta were sparring in some kind of blue Super Saiyan transformation. What the hell was this? What was it with Saiyans and pulling new transformation out of their asses? What was this one? A minute later, she had her answer, and she couldn't help but be scared of it: Super Saiyan God. Both Son Goku and Vegeta had some kind of divine power. Son of a bitch...
Odianna did nothing for a minute, just trying to wrap her mind around the concept, before she slowly shook her head and resumed going through Pan's memories. Her early childhood seemed fairly typical, well, for a hyper-powered youngster. She seemed happy and content, innocent and pure in almost every sense of the word. Well, except for an annoying habit to whine every now and then. Thankfully the Pan she knew had, mostly, dropped that habit. She studied the stories that Pan was told about her Grandfather's struggles and journeys. She could tell that they were somewhat truthful, but largely hiding important and critical details. She understood what they were doing, trying to shield the girl from the darker parts of the tales. She found that tactic distasteful, it did nothing to prepare the girl for the cruelties of life. What they did do however, between the girl and her Grandfather, did not sit well with her.
The girl's complete and utter devotion to her Grandfather, it was beyond family love, and Odianna smelt trouble with it; Pan idolized the man, it was borderline worship. Setting herself up to always trying to live up to her Grandfather's standards was a foolish notion that was bound to backfire. Everyone, every single person was a unique individual, even the Saiyans. Trying to break that notion, trying to live someone else's life as a second shadow, it was folly.
Finally, Odianna came upon how Pan crossed dimensions, and was dumbfounded. Son Goku, that complete and utter idiotic Saiyan. What the hell was he thinking with that wish?! Breaking an apparent barrier between dimensions and creating a portal with a wish from the Omni-Kings, who in the right mind would want that? Stupid moron, he probably just wanted to go butt heads with fighters from other Dimensions, it was an obvious Saiyan thing of him to do. This right here was another example of why she hated their kind.
Odianna gave a start when Pan finally spoke up, her voice timid and confused, "Why are you going through my memories?"
Odianna glared down at her. "Be quiet."
Pan flinched as if she had been struck and bowed her head. "..."
Odianna resumed and started going through Pan's time on Terra. She was surprised to see how quickly the girl turned towards self-destructive thoughts. She rolled her eyes when Pan made the mistake of comparing herself to her Grandfather, thinking that he could have saved the town's people in place of her failure. It was stupid, Pan hadn't even arrived in the dimension by the time most of the town's population had been murdered. Its as if she were intentionally overlooking. This was why she knew that Pan's idolization of her grandfather would backfire. The moment, the EXACT MOMENT things broke this little girl's ideal fantasy world where the bad guys lose and the good guys never suffered or just used the dragonballs to bail them out, she blamed herself, putting herself down and propping her grandfather up.
Sheltering people was the most idiotic thing in the world to do and was a complete and utter cruelty. It ought to be punishable by death. Odianna knew she would not stand a chance against Son Goku's god power, but if she ended up paired against him, she was going to do her best to beat the ever loving shit out of him regardless of the power difference.
Pan crossed her arms. "A month? No way, I'm my grandpa's granddaughter, there's no way it'll take me that long, I bet i'll have it at the end of the day!"
Odianna resisted the urge to take Pan's head and slam it against a wall at that memory. Stupid idiot girl. Did she not remember the stories she had been told? Her Grandfather literally told her that it took him months to learn the Kaio-Ken while in the otherworld with King Kai. She did better than her Grandfather, why couldn't she see that?
She kept on going, growing more irritated as Pan faulted herself during her Kaio-Ken training for not living up to her Grandfather's expectations. Then, she came to the first attack post Pan's Kaio-Ken training where Pan's foolish action by trying to spare a Saiyan led to the deaths of three farmers. Odianna couldn't help but still be pissed at her, at least until she saw the girl's self-destructive meltdown while sobbing in a cave.
"I... I couldn't... I didn't save them... I... I killed... I murdered him... Grandpa... what have I done?" Pan sobbed, "Oh Kami... I don't even... I don't even know what hurts more..."
She had sworn she would help these people, instead, she had just gotten three of them killed by not listening to Odianna. But... but... she had also broken her promise to Grandpa to never kill unless she had absolutely had to. She shivered, thinking of the shame and disappointment she'd see on Grandpa's face if he had seen what she had done. Or... or would he be more ashamed that she hadn't saved the farmers? She tipped over onto her side, and continued to cry, wishing that Grandpa was here instead of her, he could have saved the farmers and spared the Saiyan's life. She continued to cry until she cried herself to a pitiful, restless sleep...
Odianna wanted to strangle the girl and yell 'Forget about your damn Grandfather!'. Was she going to have to see this kind of crap through ALL of Pan's memories? Was this girl really going to keep eating away at herself like that? There was no good to come of this kind of thinking. All it would serve to do was damage herself. Odianna gave a frustrated sigh, causing Pan to flinch at the sound, before continuing on to the where Pan returned and they left to bury the farmers. Odianna frowned as the memories started to suddenly become distorted, there was immense pain emanating from this one... that wasn't a good sign...
"Find a clear spot and dig," ordered Odianna.
Pan silently obeyed, floating over rows and rows of gravestones. Most of them didn't even have anything written on them. To have been buried here, lost and forgotten... it... it was awful. Slowly, as she searched and searched, her sadness started giving way to anger. This wasn't right, this wasn't right at all. Finally, she found a spot, set the corpse down, and started to dig with her bare hands. When she made a sizable hole, she gently put the farmer in it and buried him. She put a stone she had dug up infront of the covered hole and then stood up. She slowly levitated up into the air and began to fly through the forest, taking in the never-ending gravestones. Every single one of them she saw was a throb of pain in her heart.
Finally, she came to a stop and just floated there, unable to bear going further in. "Grandpa... I..."
She looked down at the ground and sobbed. "I'm sorry... I can't... please... don't hate me... I can't let this go on, no matter what, I can't let this keep happening to these people. Even... even if I have to kill..."
She clenched her fists and shouted in anger. "ITS NOT RIGHT!"
"You told me, you told me everyone deserved a second chance!" she yelled.
"No one, no one who does this deserves a second choice," she said hoarsely.
"YOU LIED TO ME!" she screamed.
For a brief moment, so fast that Pan didn't notice, her hair flew up, a soft yellow glow illuminated it before it died down. She levitated there, trembling in anger before it gave way to self-loathing, and even a bit of resentment towards her Grandpa. Finally, she sank to the ground and knelt there, brooding in misery.
Gods, Odianna could remember thinking that this would be a wake up call for the girl. How little she understood about her young charge at the time. This wasn't growth, it wasn't breaking away from her Grandfather's shadow, it was a disastrous psyche damaging event. She could already start envisioning the repercussions this moment would have for Pan down the road.
"Pan... what the hell did I do to you?" murmured Odianna.
Pan looked up at her, confusion on her face, her voice timid, "O-odianna?"
Odianna looked down at the girl, and into her eyes, seeing nothing but pain in them. What had she done to this girl? What had the world done to her? She just looked so... what was the word? Damaged, yes, that was the word; damaged. The girl had given off an illusion of strength and stability earlier, but now, it was easy to see past it. What the hell had happened to her? Did her family even have a clue to how bad off she really was? Damaged. Fucking shit, she had helped to leave the girl like this. If Odianna wasn't going to hell before, she knew she was now, immortality aside of-course. She had forced the girl to turn against her teachings, destroyed her mercy, and turned her into a tool of revenge to be used against the Saiyans. Was crap like this why Master Kokatsune and Dina stopped talking to her through the Kais years ago? Had she driven them off?
Odianna gave a heavy sigh, and forced herself to let go of her hate for the girl. Regardless of what Odianna had done to her, could she honestly blame the girl for the Saiyan bile flowing through her veins? She wasn't even half-saiyan, only a quarter one. Pan had given everything for the world of Terra, showed herself worthy of her human blood.
Odianna knew she wasn't particularly skilled in the 'comforting someone' department, but, she leaned forward and wrapped her arms around Pan in a fierce hug. "I'm sorry Pan."
Pan sat there, rigged and tense, shock on her face, before slowly it faded. Pan slowly and fearfully wrapped her arms around Odianna, as if expecting some kind of attack or trap. When she completed her hug, Pan broke down again. She buried her head into Odianna's neck and started sobbing none-stop with relief. Odianna gave a small sigh and put her hand on the back of Pan's head, continuing to sift through the girl's memories.
She kept going, watching as her past self committed the sin of stripping Pan of her mercy and restraint, going on until she came to Pan's time in the time chamber. The memories started to grow shaky and painful to sift though again, and Odianna quickly started growing mortified when she realized why. What the hell... WHAT THE HELL WAS PAN DOING TO HERSELF?! That was NOT how someone trained!
An awful, awful idea invaded Pan's mind. If she could tolerate the extreme pain, then, she could boost her power very quickly. She fidgeted, it had hurt so much though. She struggled with herself for a time before slowly, her inhibition fell away and she quietly sobbed to herself. She couldn't let them down, she'd do whatever it took, there was an army of Saiyans coming, she didn't have a choice.
She cupped her hands to her side and began, "Kaaa-meee-haaa-meee..."
She hesitated one final time before thrusting her hands forward. "HAAAA!"
She twisted her arms and forced the kamehameha wave to turn and twist around, aiming straight for herself...
"Pan... what did you do to yourself?" whispered Odianna.
Pan's crying intensified. "I... I did what I had to do... I didn't want anyone to die... I didn't want to let you, let them, let Grandpa down..."
Odianna kept a tight lip, watching as Pan destroyed herself over and over again in the time chamber, whether it was intentionally or simply by pushing herself far to hard past her breaking point. Gods, this training Pan put herself through was just as psyche damaging as the graveyard incident. It was sickening, the girl had thought she was pushing herself, but Odianna easily saw through that. The girl was subconsciously punishing herself the entire time. Odianna grew confused by the end of it. There had been blood everywhere; in the endless training area, the main room, the bedroom. She was sure by the time chamber session's end that Pan had bled out an entire body's worth over the duration. Yet, Pan had never had the mind to clean up. Odianna didn't see that when she had gone in again after Shin had removed the time limit, so how... wait...
Aideen. She had gone in first, she had obviously seen it and cleaned it up. But, she had never told Odianna, never told her what she had seen. Odianna felt a wave of guilt hit her, Aideen probably though she wouldn't care. She was unfortunately probably right at the time. She felt uncertain of something else all of the sudden: How had Aideen taken to that sight? How had Aideen actually felt about Odianna trying to kill Pan? No... there was no question on that, she KNEW how sickened Aideen must have been with her.
Odianna forced herself to move on from the thoughts. The between round-break wouldn't last forever, she needed to pick up speed. She sifted through the rest of the Terra memories quickly, only pausing to take note of one powerful memory, not a bad one this time, but of extreme strength...
Odianna nudged Aideen over a bit and patted the spot next to her. "Alright you, get over here."
Pan smiled, she smiled a smile so big she thought her face was going to split. She flew over and sat down between them, feeling a happiness she hadn't felt for so long. It was so good to be with other people again... it...
Aideen looked at her. "What's wrong Pan?"
"I... I've just missed you guys so much," said Pan weakly, "Being alone in there was awful."
Aideen reached an arm around her neck and drew Pan into a hug. "I'm sorry you had to go through that Pan, but, I have to admit, if you've become as strong as I think you've become, you're far stronger than I am. I don't think I'll need to worry about you that much."
Pan grinned sheepishly and hugged back. "Tee hee..."
"How high can you take the Kaio-Ken?" asked Aneurin, "Aideen fights usually at a twenty, and can burst up to a thirty for a very short duration. How much more can you do?"
Pan shook her head. "It's not possible to sustain higher than that. I can fight at a times thirty for a bit, but, going any higher guts my power instantly after one combo. Doesn't matter the level. I'm left completely drained and defenseless afterwards."
Odianna nodded. "Then don't do it. Stick to a thirty, its more than enough to keep you alive and fighting. Just remember, try to leave the Super Saiyans to me, you could probably hold your own for a little bit, but don't get in over your head."
Pan nodded. "Okay."
They sat there, for a time, the four of them staring up into the night's sky, a gentle breeze blowing past them. Pan wished that she could stay there forever with them, in that single moment. For once, everything just felt so right to her.
Odieinna studied it, feeling a little perplexed. Why in the world was this simple memory radiating such power? Especially the end part of the memory, that moment rivaled any single memory that came before it. They were just sitting together, talking, and then silently looking up at the sky. It didn't make sense to Odianna. She shook off her confusion and kept on going, briefly noting how close Pan had been to revealing the truth of her heritage to Odianna, only for her to scare the girl out of revealing it. She skipped over Pan's first Super Saiyan transformation, she had already witnessed it first hand.
Odianna then got her first taste of what an actual other Dimension was like when Pan woke up in 'Kojin's Monestary'. She was pleased to see another human race doing well for themselves. She was a bit grateful for this 'Bata' girl's antics towards Pan. The way the girl took time out of her day to be with Pan, to help take care of her, to fish Pan's treasured gis out of the trash, and repair them. Bata left a warm impression, and found a sure fire way to worm her way into Pan's heart. But, in the back of Odianna's mind, she already knew something was going to go wrong. The way Pan had whispered 'Bata' earlier, had been so tenderly, and filled with loss. Odianna started having misgivings about the same time Pan did in her memories...
"Abbot Sawa, it might not be her fault!" said Bata, almost if she were begging.
Pan noticed her tone and began to wonder if she was in trouble. It seemed silly, being in trouble for not being in some crazy, borderline stalker-ish, database. she knew doctors kept some kinds of records, but, everything possible being recorded in a person's life seemed sketchy.
Yeah... no... that was setting alarm bells off in Odianna's head. She kept on watching, her misgivings rapidly growing. When Pan learned of who Kojin was, Odianna figured, in a strange way, that Bata's world was just as bad as the world of Terra. Instead of being mercilessly killed, the human race was enslaved. Not exactly many steps up from complete genocide.
Without warning, Pan's memories blackened and became painful...
Her words died suddenly, Pan felt cold, as she looked at Bata's back. Her hand's shook as she drew a finger along various healed scar marks. Bata shivered a little bit and gave her a questioning look over her shoulder.
"Bata... what are these...?" Pan asked, not sure she could take the answer.
"Oh, I used to be a little rambunctious rule breaker when I was younger," explained Bata, "I got punished a lot."
Pan clenched her fists, wrath overtaking her face. There was a brief cackle of power around Pan and sparks of energy. THIS is what Sawa had meant by punishment?!
"P-pan?" asked Bata, suddenly frightened.
"And just how young were you?" asked Pan, her voice dangerous, "And what exactly did you do?"
"U-um... well... when I was five I remember that I was so naive that I dared to call Lord Kojin foolish for one of his laws in front of Abbot Sawa," said Bata, appearing ashamed, "I got whipped a few times for that."
Pan's eyes twitched.
"The next time was when I did a poor job on cleaning the training areas and complained about having to go back and...," continued Bata.
Pan stood up, got out of the tub, grabbed a towel, and left the room, unable to bear hearing another word. Pan sat on her bed and seethed, struggling to contain herself. Right now, she wanted nothing more than to fly through the walls, break down Sawa's door, and rip his head off.
Odianna wordlessly looked down at Pan, seeing the girl shaking and trembling at the memory. There was anger on her face alright, but beneath that, clear alarm and distress at reliving the moment. This was so much more than just righteous anger. It was damaging, to see a friend that had been harmed like that, a friend that was so similar in age to herself, so young, not even ten years old yet. It was a cruelty, and even more was the cruelty that Bata herself didn't see it as such.
Odianna continued on, watching passively up until the moment Pan first caught sight of Kojin. Then her memories started warping again, pain and fear radiating off it, and from the trembling girl in Odianna's arms. She recognized the signs right away that Kojin was stronger than Pan, and that Pan herself subconsciously knew it. Wait, what was Pan doing? Why in the world was she egging him on? Directly challenging him? She needed to buy time until she became strong enough to...
Lord Kojin looked like he was starting to grow annoyed. "If you refuse to bend a knee, then you will be punished."
He raised a hand, but instead of aiming it at Pan, he aimed it at Bata. "Perhaps the death of your friend here would help you see reason."
Pan lost it the moment ki began to form in Kojin's hand. "NO!"
She let loose a scream of rage as her mastered Kaio-Ken faded and the yellow light of a Super Saiyan replaced it. Her aura exploded, her hair spiked, and her eyes turned teal. She surged forward the moment the ki blast exploded from his hand and bated it away moments before it could hit Bata.
Bata fell onto her back, shock on her face. "P-pan!?"
"You sick bastard!" Pan screamed at him, her mind numb with rage.
She rushed at him, funneling energy down her right arm and threw it at his face with all her might...
It hit...
And didn't budge his face an inch...
Odianna blanked for a moment. Okay... Pan did it, she straight up challenged an opponent who was vastly stronger than her without any kind of plan or trump card up her sleeve. It had been to save the life of a friend sure, but, that was disastrous. How the hell did she make it out of that alive?
Kojin ground his teeth. "It's a shame really, but, I know the only thing that will end your defiance... is death."
Faster than Pan could follow, he surged forward and slammed a fist into her right rib-cage. Her eyes bulged as it crumpled, shattered, and tore apart the lung behind it. She screamed, blood erupting out of her mouth. He slammed a fist up into her chin, knocking her into the air.
She lost her Super Saiyan aura as she began to fall to the ground. Before she could hit it, Kojin caught her, grabbing her neck, grabbing a leg, and bringing her back down upon his knee. Pan lost all senses in her lower body as he crumpled her body in half, a kami awful snapping sound penetrating the air. He lifted her up, and tossed her limp body to the ground.
Pan laid there, twitching uncontrollably, pain, agonizing pain, rocketing through her.
Lord Kojin aimed a hand at her, a wicked grin spreading across his face. "Goodbye Pan."
Grandpa... mom... dad...
Lord Kojin unleashed a blast of energy, and completely erased Pan from the face of the world.
Odianna was mortified and looked down at Pan, who had started crying in earnest again. Oh gods... Pan didn't make it out of that alive. She died, she literally died, she had been brutally murdered for trying to stand up to a tyrant. Odianna held Pan tightly for a minute, not sure if she wanted to continue going on, or forcing Pan to relive the moments...
With a heavy sigh, she resumed, watching Pan's judgement, seeing the girl squirm in distress.
"But, you have a strong sense of justice, and know right against wrong. You saved your friend's life, you stood up against a tyrant's way of life, and sacrificed your life fighting evil," said Yanluo, "Though, not much came from it."
Pan winced, she cringed at those words, how they hurt. Both times Grandpa had died, he made a difference. Her? She had bit off more than she could chew, she knew she brought on her own death by drawing Kojin to her and trying to take him on, and for what? Unlike Grandpa... unlike Grandpa she hadn't made a damn difference. Pan could do nothing but hang her head in shame.
Odianna growled, unable to hold herself back any longer. "Pan, you are an idiot."
Pan withered under her rebuke.
Odianna viciously scolded her. "Why do you keep comparing yourself to your Grandfather over and over again? There's no point to it, no purpose but to eat away at yourself. I want you to repeat after me: I am a twelve year old girl, eight back then."
"I... I am a twelve y-year old g-girl, e-eight back then," stammered Pan.
"My Grandfather, who is older, faster, stronger, and more experienced, with a GOD FORM hidden up his ass, is not someone I should compare every action I do with, nor base my entire life around him and his morals and judgements," said Odianna, her voice thin.
Pan looked up at her in disbelief.
"Say it Pan," said Odianna, her voice taking on a warning tone.
"M-my G-grandfather, who is o-older, f-faster, s-stronger, and mm... mm... more experienced, with a... a god form h-hidden up his... his...," Pan stammered and got stuck on.
Odianna rolled her eyes. "You can skip that word."
Pan looked slightly relieved and struggled to continue, "...is not s-someone I should compare e-every action I do w-w-with, n-nor base my e-entire life around h-him and his m-morals and j-judgements."
Odianna nodded curtly, studying Pan's face and eyes. The girl had a surreal look about her, as if she didn't believe what was going on was real. Odianna resisted the urge to slap the stupor out of her and resumed going through the girl's memories. She stopped suddenly at another jarring memory...
Cheikame tilted his head. "Super Saiyan? Is that the yellow aura, spiky hair thing?"
Pan scowled. "Its a 'thing' of monsters."
Cheikame gazed at her, and for a moment, his eyes flashed blue before it faded. Pan felt curious, wondering what he had just done. She didn't feel any different, nor did she detect any difference in him either.
"Monsters you say? Well, what have these monster's done?" asked the old man.
Pan narrowed her eyes, clenching her fists. "Murdered, slaughter, billions of people. Destroyed worlds, ended civilizations... they... killed my friends... innocent lives..."
Cheikame nodded slowly, she was surprised to see him so readily accept her words without disbelief. "I see, tell me, can your family do this transformation too?"
Pan blinked a few times, that was a very good guess on his part. "Yeah, me, my dad, his brother, and my grandpa."
Cheikame studied her. "You seem to hold your grandfather in such reverence, so tell me, Pan, is your grandfather a monster?"
Before Pan could stop herself, she was in Super Saiyan, and lifting the old man up by his throat. "DON'T YOU DARE! My Grandfather saved the Earth countless times! Saved the universe! Hell, he fought once to bring back eleven universes that had been destroyed! He's a hero that NONE of you can ever compare with!"
The old man smiled, he choked out a few words. "But... he has... your Super Saiyan... power... so answer the question... is he a monster?"
Pan froze, the question shattered her anger, and she lost her power at its words. She set the man down and looked away. S-she felt so shaken, had not an ounce of confidence in her own words and thoughts...
"N-no, my Grandpa isn't a monster," she mumbled.
"Are you a monster?" asked Cheikame.
"No," mumbled Pan.
Cheikame put a hand on her shoulder. "Pan, its not the power, but the person. Your Grandfather did great things with it when others would have done great evil with it, have done great evil with it. Don't hate it, or people like you, just because the actions of others."
Pan couldn't bear to look him in the eye as he spoke.
Odianna was... disgruntled with herself. If she had intended to make Pan hate herself, she had done a damn good job to get her into that state at that point. Thankfully, Cheikame seemed very wise, and helped the girl out. Though, having her viewpoints constantly shattered and shifted around was not something that should be happening so frequently. People needed stability in their lives, or they'd have nothing concrete to hold onto, to ground themselves on. However...
"I think your Grandfather is an selfish idiot unworthy of being called a hero, nor dedicating your life towards. If you flip out on me like you did on Cheikame, I will beat the shit out of you," said Odianna calmly, goading her.
There was a flash of anger in Pan's eyes, a bit more focus, before she restrained herself. Good, anger was good, it got her out of depression. Now, to continue...
She was initially pleased to see Pan make friends in the afterlife, however, that very quickly faded as she caught onto what was going on. Zeroes and Master Cheikame had poked and prodded Pan down the path of vengeance. Odianna watched it silently, seeing similarities between Pan's life and her own. Though, Odianna knew she had willingly walked down that road while Pan had practically been dragged down it. Still... it was disturbing to watch...
So be it, she had screwed it all up. She'd suffer the consequences of getting herself killed. She'd train, she'd kill Kojin's soul when he eventually died, then... maybe... she'd kill her own soul. She'd rather not spend an eternity without her family. Or, maybe she'd ask to be reincarnated instead, self soul-destruction seemed a bit extreme. Who knows, that battle was a LONG time off, she'd think about it again afterwards.
Odianna stared down at Pan, furious. She did not resist this time. She hauled off and smacked her across her face. Pan curled up and cried.
"Pan!" she shouted at her, "I am going to say this once and only once. Do not think about killing yourself, or your soul, EVER again. Are we clear? It is a COWARDS way out, and even though I don't respect him at all, what the hell would your Grandfather say? Would he ever take that way out? Well?"
Pan sobbed. "N-no..."
Odianna reached down and pulled Pan into a hug, letting the girl cry and try to steady herself. She waited a minute for Pan to quiet down before resuming. She hated doing this to the girl, but it had to be done.
She continued watching, slowly glowing alarmed by something she hadn't considered yet. Pan was... vaulting... leaps and bounds ahead in power and strength at an insane speed. Not even two years and the girl had gone from a weakling who couldn't take on a third class Saiyan to a Mastered Super Saiyan. This growth was abnormal, even for a Saiyan...
Pan's memories abruptly turned pitched black and painful. Odianna flinched, feeling backlash and resistance from Pan. Something was about to happen that she didn't want to relive.
"S-stop...," begged Pan.
Odianna gave her a stern look. "Pan, stop fighting it. That's an ORDER."
Pan flinched at the words. "I... I don't want to... I don't want to see her die again..."
Odianna leveled her gaze at Pan, staring her down until Pan finally broke her gaze and lowered her resistance. Odianna watched Pan be revived by Bata, and then have her friend murdered before her very eyes by Kojin. The maelstrom of emotions and pain was debilitating. Pan was raging and crying at the same time in Odianna's arms, distressed beyond words. It was a devastating moment for the child, and obviously one she tried to keep buried as hard as she could. That wouldn't do, it had to be confronted and conquered. She knew it was cruel, but, she replayed them memory over and over again, forcing Pan to relive it until the girl finally stopped crying, watching the memory with silent wide-eyed anguish rather than unbearable pain. Painful memories were okay, but not if they completely shut the person down.
Odianna wasn't surprised to see Pan go Super Saiyan 2, though she was still uneasy about her climbing to that power at that age. The way the battle ended though... using Super Saiyan 2 and Kaio-Ken together, gods that had to hurt. Beyond that though, the willingness to make that kind of sacrifice reminded Odianna of how much of a cruel bitch she had been to the girl who would readily make such a choice.
And she was reminded again not to much later when Pan was reunited and arguing with her father...
"Its true!" she sobbed, "I lost them all. Bata, Aideen, Aneurin, all the people of Haven..."
Gohan paused for a moment, a hopeful thought coming to the forefront of his mind. "Well, you almost lost Aideen."
Pan sharply pulled away from him and gave him a shocked look. "A-almost?"
Gohan smiled. "We came to Terra a few hours after you disappeared from it. Aneurin was badly hurt, but alive, and that crazy Odianna girl was using her energy to keep Aideen alive. So, I offered a Senzu and..."
He gave a startled yelp when Pan tackled him to the ground. "DADDY!"
She buried her face into his chest, crying uncontrollably. "Aideen's alive, Aideeeeeen's aliiiveeee!"
Gohan put his arms around her, rubbing her back gently. "Shhh Pan, shh..."
Minutes dragged by, with nothing but the sounds of Pan's relieved cries filling the air. Finally, Pan got ahold of herself and pulled away, wiping tears from her eyes.
"I... I have to go back to Terra!" said Pan, "I have to help them!"
Gohan winced. "Pan... you can't go back."
Pan looked at him in disbelief. "Why?!"
He shook his head. "Aideen told us to tell you not to worry about her, but, that you couldn't return or Odianna would kill you. She means it too, that crazy girl almost killed me."
Pan frowned. "Odianna..."
She clenched her fists. "I don't care if she'll kill me."
Odianna pursed her lips; The girl cared so much for Aideen, and was willing to sacrifice herself for even the chance to help them; she couldn't stop herself from whispering, "I'm sorry Pan."
Pan had grown quiet with the memory, she slowly tried to pull her into a tighter hug. "It's... it's okay..."
There was an air of reality around Pan now. Odianna figured the girl finally figured out this wasn't a dream or illusion. It was nothing but cold, hard reality, and she was going to have to deal with.
"I'm going to keep going," warned Odianna.
Pan shook her head, her voice steadying. "It's... I'm okay..."
"To bad, you're going to sit down and shut up while I finish," said Odianna crudely.
Pan snorted at that, a soft giggle escaping her lips. It relieved Odianna immensely to hear it. It was a good sign, a sign of stability. Having someone to just hold her and share in her pain did wonders for the child.
Odianna resumed going through the memories, she suddenly found herself disturbed by something...
"Dad... put me down, I can walk now," said Pan.
"Humor your father," was his only reply.
He winced and came to a stop when she squeezed his arm hard, using his own gifted strength against him. "I am not some weak little girl anymore. Put. Me. Down."
"You've never been weak to me Pan," said Gohan.
She only stared up at him in silence, looking vexed. With a sigh, Gohan set her down. Pan wearily stood on her feet, her legs wobbly. One step at a time, she started forward without looking back.
Odianna frowned. Something wasn't making sense. If there was a time to have completely broken down and tried to kill herself, it would have been after Pan had lost her friend. Pan had thought about it in the afterlife, but she had never acted upon it. Yet, Odianna noted how strong Pan still seemed in these memories, how she kept going on so little. Odianna figured there was far more to keep going through, but, if they were all like this, where had this suicidal breakdown Pan had gone through come from? The girl had emotional and self-destructive episodes, sure, but nothing to a suicidal degree. Something wasn't adding up...
Odianna stored the thought for later and kept on going. Before long, Pan was finally home, though, that moment of being re-united with her friends and family was PAINFULLY awkward.
"You're even worse than I am with people," murmured Odianna.
Pan snorted. "Am not!"
"Are to and you know it," countered Odianna.
Pan stuck her tongue out at Odianna, only to pull it back and giggle when Odianna leaned forward and made a biting motion towards the offending girl.
Odianna watched the next few memories pass with cautious optimism and reality, along with a bit of pain when Pan had a nightmare of Odianna murdering her. Gods, she really scarred the child. She toke note of how things were awkward and tense between Pan and her family. She could smell a boiling point and breakdown coming miles away...
Pan stared at Goku passively for a moment before she flinched and then her eyes narrowed. "Yeah, you're to soft to be one of them."
Goku went silent for a moment before he walked forward and offered her a hand. "There's nothing wrong with that. It takes a strong person to be willing to show mercy."
Pan took the hand, and shocked him when she pulled herself up and slammed a fist into his face. He fell back onto his butt, staring at her in disbelief.
"That is what your mercy would have gotten you on Terra! Your lucky it was me, one of those Saiyans would have KILLED you if you offered them a hand!" Pan said with anger and desperation.
Goku opened and closed his mouth a few times, before he finally said,
"It's the right thing to do."
Pan stood up and yelled at him, "LIAR!"
He looked at her, not understanding.
"I showed him mercy! I wanted to let him live! That Saiyan MURDERED three people when I did!" Pan yelled at him, "They died because of ME!"
Goku winced, seeing tears well up in her eyes. Goku stood up, walked over, and hugged Pan.
"It's okay Pan, it's okay," he murmured.
"Its NOT okay!" she said hoarsely, "I-I s-saw it Grandpa, I saw it..."
He grow confused. "Saw what?"
She looked like she was trying to speak, but could only start to cry.
Goku hesitated for a moment before putting a hand on her forehead. "Show me Pan, show me what you saw."
Odianna raised an eyebrow. Wait, Son Goku had done what she was doing now?
He stopped reading her mind and sighted a harrowed look in her eyes, hungering for approval; he wrapped her in a tight hug, and spoke softly, "I could never hate you Pan. You did what you had to do, and seeing that graveyard, they had their second chance already, a long time ago."
Pan hugged him back fiercely, as if life or death, and began sobbing nonstop with relief.
Reluctantly, Goku put his hand back on her forehead. "Pan, I want you to show me everything that happened, from the moment you left, to the moment you got back. Okay?"
Pan nodded and sniffled. "Okay Grandpa..."
Huh, maybe Son Goku had a bit more to him that met the eye. She could give him some, grudging respect. Yet it was curious... if he had already done this, then there was no reason Pan should have been in such a state. She should have already come to terms with her memories... wait a second...
She kept on going for a minute before she grew furious. "That fucking idiot."
Pan winced and grew confused. "Grandpa didn't do anything... why are you yelling at him."
"Because of exactly that! Big whoop, he listened to your memories, where the hell was the TALK?! He listened, said he didn't hate or blame you, bought you an icecream and CALLED IT A DAY AT THAT?!" said Odianna, livid beyond belief.
Pan hesitated, looking uncertain. "But... it meant so much to me, Grandpa usually doesn't do that sort of thing... he's kind of all fight-fight, not talk-talk."
Odianna snorted. "No shit. Expecting any kind of in-depth emotional support from a Saiyan, I can't believe I got my hopes up. Forget the respect I was starting to build for him. He lost it. You don't leave things like this half done. And YOU, Pan!"
Pan tensed. "Y-yes?"
Odianna narrowed her eyes. "Stupid girl, you should have talked to someone!"
Pan looked away. "..."
"If you leave things unresolved Pan, they will just eat away at you," she explained softly, "It's why I've always tried to remain set in my ways and my chosen path. I've accepted my life, come to terms with it, and embraced it. It does not haunt me like it does you. When I make a mistake or go through a difficult situation, I don't endlessly berate myself for it, I acknowledge and accept it before moving on."
She grew quiet for a moment. "That's why... I'm doing this now with you... I made a mistake by harming you, and I want to fix it."
Pan blushed feverishly. "I... um... it's okay..."
"It's not Pan, and you know it," said Odianna scornfully, "If you want to punch me through a wall afterwords, I 'might' let you."
Pan raised an eyebrow. "Yeah right."
They shared a warrior's grin before Odianna picked up where she left off. She knew she didn't have to much longer, maybe ten to fifteen minutes before the between round break was over. She flew through the next few years of memories. It was... pretty much nothing but training.
"You're more of a train-aholic than I am," murmured Odianna.
It was to much training to be honest, where was the little girl acting like one? That was three years of her childhood down the drain with very little enjoyment in them...
Pan snorted. "Sure."
Odianna paused when strange ripple in Pan's mind momentarily eclipsed Pan's memories. "What...?"
"The Demon Time Ring," whispered Pan uneasily, "That's when I was hit by that ripple effect."
Odianna frowned and sounded it out. "Demon Time Ring?"
She didn't like the sound of that and uneasily resumed. She grew very disturbed as she began to understand the nature of what was going on. Time travel, alternate timelines, timeplanes, Supreme Kai of Time, the Omni-King, corrupting a ring that was supposed to allow travel between them. This was BIG, this wasn't something a twelve year old girl should have been involved in. Hell, this wasn't something Odianna herself would have wanted to be involved in. She got her first taste of an alternate reality, made nothing of it, got her second taste, and immediately disliked it. However...
"I'll deal with you in a moment 'Gohan'," said Goku, anger in his voice, "But first, I have something to say to the other me."
The Other Gohan crossed his arms and began to tap his feet. "Make it quick, I have a sudden urge to kill you that I don't think I'll be able to suppress for much longer."
Goku burst into Super Saiyan 2 and bum rushed the Other Goku, picking him up and slamming him into the ground. "WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?"
Pan took a step back in surprise. She... she had never seen Grandpa so angry in all of her life...
"Chi-Chi told me what you did! You murdered innocent people because you were too much of a coward to fight Raditz!" yelled Goku.
The Other Goku said nothing, he merely averted his eyes, shame on his face.
The Other Gohan began to laugh. "Even another version of him knows how much of a waste of space he is. I almost don't want to kill him, he'd make such an improvement over the one on the ground."
Goku ignored the Other Gohan and glared down at the Other Goku. "I'm not stupid. The only way my friends would have let you murder innocents was over their dead bodies. You betrayed them, you betrayed everyone! You let Gohan be twisted into that THING over there! How could you? How could you be so spineless?"
"I... I had no choice... Raditz would have killed Gohan if I hadn't...," whispered the Other Goku weakly, "I did it for my family..."
"Your family?" said Goku in disbelief, "Your family would have rather died than see you fall like this. I would have, and DID die, rather than let Raditz win. Your true son would have rather died than be turned into that beast."
The Other Gohan spoke in a mocking tone, "I enjoy my life immensely I'll have you know. Slaughtering the heroic types you look to be is one of my favorite pastimes."
Goku lifted the Other Goku up and pointed towards Gohan and Pan. "That over there is the life you could have had, a good man as a son, and a wonderful granddaughter."
He then pointed to the Other Gohan and then the three Saiyans. "This instead is what you get, and what you deserve."
That was... wow...
Odianna silently marveled at the memory. Pan saw the look on her face and nodded, but said nothing. There wasn't anything to say to it. It was something she could not refute, rebuke, or use against Son Goku. She grudgingly threw him some respect in her mind. However... she couldn't help but grow bitter.
God dammit, why couldn't there have been good Saiyan's like Son Goku and his family in her dimension? God fucking dammit. Things might have been different if such a good, powerful, an influential family had existed in her dimension. Terra might have been left untouched, unspoiled...
She shook her head and kept on going, only to immediately regret it. Holy shit... that evil version of Pan's father, Son Gohan... that power...
HAAAAAAAAAA!" roared the other Gohan, half crouching, clenching his arms.
Pan staggered back and fell onto her butt as energy ripped out of the Other Gohan and skyrocketed. Her eyes went wide with shock and horror as his power continued to climb. It was enormous, Pan couldn't even wrap her mind around it. His ki was so far higher than even her father and Grandpa's were when they sparred without god ki.
By the gods... by the gods... that evil ki she felt... not even Rutabage could have compared to the waves of pure sin radiating off of that vile man. That power was gigantic... huge... incomparable. She would never have been able to match it. Even Son Goku admitted in the next memory that Super Saiyan 3 wouldn't stand a chance. Pan was shivering in her arms, radiating fear and unease.
Then, Odianna watched in disbelief as Son Goku went Super Saiyan Blue and manhandled the Evil Son Gohan. "I'm so fucked in this tournament."
Pan rolled her eyes. "Welcome to my world of playing catch up."
Odianna kept watching, up until she encountered the a memory laced with fear, of a Saiyan named Bardock...
Bardock slowly shook his head and turned towards Pan. Rather than speak, he stared at her for a few minutes, appearing to mull something over.
He closed his eyes. "Pan, there are so many things I could say, things I could try to change, but... I think rather than give you a warning or a suggestion, I'll ask you a question."
Pan felt curious, and a little wary at his words. "What is it?"
"Would you sacrifice everything, even who you are as a person, if it meant standing up for what you believe in and, in your mind, protecting your friends and family?" asked Bardock.
Pan didn't hesitate. "Yes."
Gohan stiffened, looking back and forth between Pan and Bardock before demanding. "Why ask that question Bardock?"
Bardock shook his head, refusing to answer.
Pan crossed her arms, she had a hunch what he meant. "It probably means I'm going to die again at some point. Great, as if the first time wasn't enough."
Bardock gave her a sad smile. "Just remember what your answer when the time comes to make that sacrifice. What happens isn't exactly what you think it will be."
Pan refused to grow alarmed or show any signs of nervousness. "If you're going to just tease it around me, don't bother. I'll just have to grab the dragonballs when we get back to get ready."
Bardock hesitated for a moment. "Pan... not everything can be solved with the dragonballs."
A solid lump formed in Pan's throat. W-what was he saying? That she'd die and the dragonballs couldn't help her come back?! Pan struggled with the thought as a wave of fear washed over her. S-she had died before without thinking she could come back, she could do so again! She wouldn't be afraid to face it! If it even came down to it that is, she had a warning now, and she'd make use of it.
"Well, when the time comes, I'll just have to try harder," said Pan dismissively, trying her best to sound brave and unaffected.
Odianna stared wordlessly down at Pan, who was starting to fidget and shake with anxiety. She tried looking brave, just has she had in the memory, but it was a lie that was so easy to see. Gods... who the hell would willingly hint to a little girl such a fate? He hadn't even given here any concrete information to try and change her future! Such a thing eating away at the back of someones mind, in their subconscious, that was dangerous. Everyone knew that they would someday die, but, to have it just laid bare at you like that...
Odianna tenderly pet Pan's hair, trying her best to comfort the child. Pan didn't respond, merely swallowing and closing her eyes. Odianna continued, watching the group face off against the bug man, Cell. The powers of a God of Destruction were a terrifying thing. But, the thing that was agitating her at the moment was Super Saiyan Blue and the Kaio-Ken. Unlike regular Super Saiyan and the Kaio-Ken, they worked together. Son Goku went times fucking thirty. There was 0% chance of her beating that. Shit...
She pushed the thought away, she'd deal with that later. She found herself very quickly growing tired of the 'Towa' demon woman. Forcing the group of Saiyans to harm their own family from another timeplane was crushing to watch. She could practically feel the memory, feel the guilt, crawling and scratching at the back of Pan's mind.
"DADDY!" screamed Bulla, holding a hand out towards Vegetto.
Vegeta flew back to the group as the grayness of stopped time spread from Vegetto and engulfed his daughter and his friends and family, spreading to consume their entire world. Pan watched it all quietly, feeling horrific guilt trying to tear her apart. She could feel it in the other's ki as well, none of them felt remotely good after doing this.
To her; the scene; a dead Vegetto with his daughter on the ground nearby stretching a desperate, pleading, hand out to him, tears streaming down her face. Pan knew the image was going to haunt her for the rest of her life.
There was... nothing she could really say or do to fix that memory, Pan was right, it WAS going to haunt the deep recesses of her mind until the day the girl died. It was murder of the innocent, worse, it was murder of the girl's friends and family, that she had participated in. "We... all do what we have to do to survive Pan. Nothing more nothing less. We simply have to try and live with ourselves afterwards."
Pan looked away, choking, trying to stifle a guilt ridden sob. Odianna did the only thing she really could do and simply hugged her again for the umpteenth time, wishing she had some better tool of comfort.
She continued on, watching the Saiyan Gods face off against the pinnacle of the Arcosian race. It was... a disastrous spectacle that put the notion in her mind that there were things actually WORSE out there than the Saiyan Race. She didn't have a clue how the hell the Saiyans pulled a win out of their ass after Pan fell unconscious.
A darkness began to creep into Pan's mind that made Odianna wince. There was a very bleak edge to the oncoming memory, and she watched it slowly and carefully. The gods, Zamasu and Black, they dominated the Saiyans with childlike ease. Pan tried to stand up to them and their beliefs, only to be dismissed with ease. Then the agony of her father dying hit the child and abruptly, the memory ended without resolution.
"The hell...?" murmured Odianna.
"You'll see, later on," answer Pan with unease.
Odianna nodded and resumed. She found it startling when Pan woke up six months later out of a ki coma unable to use most of her body. She had to give the girl credit though, she regained control and adjusted very quickly.
She disapproved of Bra and Piccolo's interactions with Pan. "Assholes, you just woke up from a coma, they should have given you some space and understanding."
"They were just worried," murmured Pan.
"And they could have worried from a distance," said Odianna with distaste.
Suddenly, she grew still...
"Pan, you killed Black and led to Zamasu's death," called down Vegeta.
Impossible, there was no way. She hesitated briefly before continuing on...
Pan nodded. "Agreed, you said I killed Black. HOW!?"
"You blew him the hell up and literally tore the universe in half," was Vegeta's reply.
Pan scowled at him. "Stop screwing with me."
"I'm not," said Vegeta, his tone deadly serious.
Pan stared at him, bewildered. "You... can't be serious..."
"Pan, do you ever remember glowing green? Or using a kind of green energy?" asked Gohan.
Pan thought for a moment, searching her memories. "No, but... I do remember Bata told me when I first appeared in her dimension, I was glowing green."
Gohan nodded. "And when you teleported yourself and I out of that dimension, you were also glowing green. At first, all I thought of it was that it let you move between dimensions. But... when you destroyed Cooler and pretty much killed him in a single hit..."
"Wait, what?! Chronoa told me you beat him! And you guys went along with that?!" exclaimed Pan.
Goku scratched his head. "That was a lie, Chronoa wanted us to keep what you did from you."
Pan was livid, but held her tongue. "Okay then, what happened with Black and Zamasu?"
"You started glowing green shortly before Black killed Gohan," said Goku, "After that, the sky tore open like it first did when the portal to other dimensions was made, and green energy just poured into your body. You had a full on green aura, and it changed your eye and hair color."
Pan nodded slowly. "So I killed Black with that power?"
Goku shook his head. "No, not at first. Black started getting stronger, it was only after you went Super Saiyan along with using your energy that you won. Seeing what you did firsthand was... something else I'll tell you what."
Pan turned to face him, walked over, grabbed his hand, and put it on her head. "Don't tell me, show me."
Goku hesitated for a moment before he nodded and focused. Pan closed her eyes as his memories flowed into her head. She watched in disbelief as she took in the green energy and proceeded to dominate Black. She couldn't help but grow frustrated with herself when she screwed around and toyed with Black instead of killing him right away. Her eyes opened and went wide when she went 'Super Saiyan Green' and blew away Black and tore a green hole in the universe with one ki blast. She also felt a little scared of herself when she began to mutilate and butcher the immortal Zamasu over and over again.
It was strange, to watch shared memories through a memory, but, it was enough to get the point across.
"Super Saiyan Green," murmured Odianna with uncertainty and awe.
That power... it was... unreal... it went beyond the gods, beyond divinity...
She glanced down at Pan, seeing the uncertainty and fear of rejection in the girls eyes."Pan... what are you?"
Pan didn't reply, a worried and fearful look crossing her face.
Odianna. took Pan off her lap and set her on the floor infront of her. "Pan..."
"Y-yes...?" replied Pan timidly.
"You... are everything I could ever hope to become," said Odianna.
Pan blanked for a moment. "H-huh?"
"That power Pan, with it, there is nothing you cannot do, no goal you cannot accomplish, no wrong you cannot right," said Odianna with reverence.
Pan shook her head. "No... I'm not... I can't..."
Odianna furrowed her eyes and placed a hand on Pan's forehead to resume.
Piccolo turned his back on her. "Is it? Pan, we don't fight to 'end' people. We will kill if we must, but our goal is to defend those we care about and better ourselves in the process. Not kill our enemies and mindlessly chase power. Goku might be more merciful, Vegeta and I might be less forgiving, but all three of us have the same goal. If you can't honestly see the difference between your reasons and ours, then you lost your way and don't even deserve the power you have at your fingertips now, let alone the power of a god or that green energy. If you keep on this path you are walking, you'll end up worse than Freeza, Black, Zamasu, or any of the other villains we've encountered. I can only hope you realize this before you make an irreversible mistake."
With that, Piccolo took off, leaving her there, feeling shocked and numb.
"How dare they," whispered Odianna, enraged.
Pan shook her head. "No, they're right, I'm a villian, a monster, I don't deserve that power..."
"Don't you dare," warned Odianna.
She glared full force down at Pan. "What, just because you don't conform to their rigid narrow mindset that gives them a right to go at you like that? Allude to you being a villian? Worse than Black? Please, you SAVED their ungrateful asses from Black."
Pan hesitated, an uncertain look on her face. "But..."
Odianna cupped Pan's chin in her hand and lifted her head up to make eye contact. "Pan, look at me. There is nothing wrong with obtaining the power you need to protect those you care for. Mercy is all well and good, but more often than not, you just need to put down your enemies."
Their was a darkening inside Pan's eyes. "There's nothing wrong with obtaining power..."
Odianna nodded. "They had NO right to say those kind of things to you."
Pan's eyes tightened. "They had no right."
"When you're older, and in control of your power, it'll be you who makes the decisions Pan. You might have to put up with their bullshit until you attain control, but there will come a day when it is by YOUR hand that justice will be met out, and by YOUR will that evil like the Saiyans we dealt with shall be struck down," explained Odianna.
Pan smiled eagerly. "Yeah... when I figure that power out. I'll be the hero..."
"Even greater then your Grandfather," said Odianna.
"Even greater than Grandpa," whispered Pan, almost fanatically.
Odianna smiled at her. "And I trust that you will do whatever it takes to reach that point, and make the existence we live in a much better place. Promise?"
Pan nodded feverishly. "Yes, yes! I promise, I'll make the dimensions a better place!"
Odianna patted her head. "Good girl."
Pan beamed.
"Now, lets finish up shall we?" said Odianna.
Pan nodded and leaned her head forward eagerly, and Odianna placed a hand on her head. She went through the rest of Son Goku's 'scolding and support' with chagrin. Then, the next month came and went. She had to admit, Pan really deserved that month off to relax...
...
...
...
It sunk in. It hit Odianna hard suddenly. She could remember her own life before the Saiyan invasions, when she could honestly say she had been happy. She knew of what life was SUPPOSED to be like without genocidal Saiyan invasions or crazy trips to other dimensions. That life had been robbed from Pan when she was eight years old, and she had gone through utter hell since then, living and breathing conflict or training with few bright spots in-between. She felt a surge of kinship with the child, recognizing that their lives mirrored one another closely.
"We're similar, the two of us," murmured Odianna sadly, "Neither of us got a life of peace and happiness we deserved."
Pan scooted forward and leaned forward, wrapping her arms around Odianna, resting her head against the immortal teenager's bosom. "No... we didn't, its not fair..."
Odianna smirked sadly and had a sudden idea of how to comfort Pan better. "No its not. But, we'll be alright. Right, my little sister?"
Pan's eyes went wide at those last two words and began to shake with happiness. "Y-yeah, yeah we sure will big sis!"
Odianna felt successful with those words and decided to finish up, making a pass over Pan's most recent memories. She frowned intently. Something wasn't right...
"Those thoughts of yours," murmured Odianna.
Pan looked away. "I... I know you don't want me to think like that big sis, but... I can't help but think I'm a monster for what I thought, what I did against Coli..."
Odianna frowned, searching and playing the memories over and over again, this wasn't adding up at all. "Something's off... those thoughts... are they really yours?"
Pan blinked. "H-huh?"
Odianna's eyes narrowed intently, a warning light going off in her head. "Pan. One does not just suddenly change their thought patterns just like that. And what happened right before you entered the ring, how do you explain just snapping like that?"
"I... I don't know big sis," murmured Pan with confusion, "I don't understand what you're getting at."
Odianna said nothing for a minute, working the possibilities over in her mind. "You don't do drugs. You don't have a multiple-personality disorder. You weren't poisoned or afflicted with a disease. You weren't intentionally wanting to act like that, you resisted. That leaves basically one option given the setting: Someone was messing with your mind."
"Was... what...," said Pan blankly.
Odianna could see the dots connecting behind the girl's eyes, see the clarity entering her her face, and feel the girl's mind accepting what had happened, starting to repair the guilt-ridden damage it had inflicted on itself.
Pan's face contorted with rage and hate. "MESSED WITH MY MIND?! WHO! HOW! WHY?!"
Odianna narrowed her eyes. "I don't know, but you need to guard yourself Pan. Always be alert."
Pan shook with fury, and then sobbed. "It wasn't my fault... it wasn't my fault... oh gods... if I tell them, maybe they won't hate me anymore... maybe my family will take me back..."
Oh, right, that ought to be fixed to.
"Pan, they don't hate you," said Odianna sternly, "They were congratulating you and saying they were proud of you for not killing the Saiyan Coli, but you were kind of out of it and didn't seem to hear them."
Pan's jaw dropped and tears streamed down her face. "R-really?!"
Odianna nodded. "Yes Pan."
Pan hugged her and started sobbing again. "I'm such an idiot! I was... I was going to kill myself because I thought they wouldn't want me anymore, that I'd be alone... that I was a failure... big sis... thank you, thank you for stopping me, for saving me."
It took a lot to make Odianna blush at praise, but she did then and there. "I'd do it again in a heart beat my little sister. But, to be frank, I saw nothing wrong with the beating you gave to that Coli bitch, I would have wanted you to do more, and I would never have abandoned you for it."
Pan smiled warmly. "Hee hee... that's cause you do worse things than I do to Saiyans. N-n-not that they don't deserve it!"
Odianna nodded and cupped Pan's chin. "Not that they don't deserve it indeed. Remember the promise Pan, real monsters like Coli have no place in the dimensions. When the time comes..."
"I'll make the dimensions a better place," whispered Pan fanatically.
Odianna started to rise to her feet before Pan suddenly clutched her hand. "Big sis... please... come back with me to Earth... I know, I know Terra is your home, but please... don't go back, there's nothing there anymore. You, Aideen, and the other three can come live on Earth and get a life you deserved. Please... come back with us... I just... I want to see you happy, I want to see Aideen happy, like we were... like that time... when we sat on top of the lookout looking up at the moon. The three of us could be sisters, together..."
Odianna stared wordlessly at Pan who was giving her the most desperate, loyal, pleading look she had ever seen. "..."
Gods, that face... it was hard to say no to that. But...
"I don't think I have a place on your world," said Odianna.
A dangerous tone filled Pan's voice, and a deadly look filled her eyes, "Then I'll make a place for you there. I'm not taking no for an answer and I don't care if anyone else has a problem with it, they'll have to take it up with me."
Odianna felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand up. "Make a place huh?"
For a brief moment, Odianna had an understanding of what Son Goku, Gohan, and Piccolo were afraid of. There was something... unsettling about Pan at the moment, she was radiating an aura of danger. She pondered it for a moment, then smiled. Yes, she understood quite well. They were afraid they wouldn't be able to control her. Oh yes, Pan was going to become one of the most powerful beings in all of existence with that green power of hers. Woe be it to ANYONE who challenges her in any way or denies her anything. And Odianna wanted nothing more than to be at her side and help guide her in cleansing the Dimensions of monsters like the Saiyan race. The two of them together would be unstoppable...
"Alright Pan, after the tournament," said Odianna.
Pan's face lit up with such happiness. "Oh big sis!"
Pan hugged her again fiercely.
"Round four will begin in five minutes!" the Grand Priests voiced echoed throughout the arena.
Odianna slowly stood up and turned her back to Pan. "I'll see you later. Take a moment to gather yourself, and then head back to your area. We will discuss me swapping dimensions later, after the tournament. Keep it our little secret for now. Remember to keep your guard up and your mind sharp, someone is after your head."
"Okay," said Pan, her eyes narrowing.
Pan rose to her feet, going to the sink that still had a mirror, and began to wash her face off. Odianna could tell she was furious over someone messing with her head, and it did beg the question, just who had done it?
A different set of concerns and circumstances returned to her mind. She had a wish she wanted to get, but there was now a BIG problem in her way. Super Saiyan 3, and Super Saiyan God. She had noted Goku and Vegeta's no God Ki bet, but didn't trust them to hold to it. If she was calculating right, her new trump card MIGHT match Super Saiyan 3, but God Ki? It begged the question: How the fuck was she supposed to deal with this and beat them? Could she? She needed her wish. She was willing to start over and guide Pan, gods know the girl needed someone who actually understood her in her life, but she could NOT leave things unresolved in her home dimension. Pan could one day deal with it, but, that dimension was Odianna's problem to deal with, and she'd see it done first. There was a threat there, and it had to be eliminated...
Towa watched Odianna leave the bathroom, taking extra precaution to keep her presence hidden from the woman. This woman was far more dangerous and aware than Towa had originally given her credit for, alerting Pan to her mental manipulation. Not to mention, she was immortal. Towa had found THAT little tidbit out with her magic when she was back-seat watching Odianna go through Pan's memories. Odianna was a new chess-piece on the board Towa was playing against the gods that she did not quite know how to define. A Queen? A Rook? A Pawn? It was hard to say.
The woman also held INCREDIBLE influence over Pan in her weakened mental state. Odianna had the child wrapped around her finger with that 'little sister' 'big sister' nonsense. Pan was so needy at the moment, so hungry for acceptance. It was laughable, Odianna could order Pan to wipe out worlds and she'd probably do it to appease the woman. It was a shame she probably wouldn't do so. Ah well, after all, there was a reason she was a human and Towa was a demon. Not everyone could have such gifts. Regardless, Towa was relieved that Odianna had intervened, because, Towa had to admit, she had screwed up. She had addled and weakened Pan's mind, hoping to drive her to kill Coli in the tournament and get disqualified in order for the girl to get into a confrontational argument with the gods to help increase her hatred of them. She had never actually thought Pan would break, and especially not turn suicidal. As much as she loved destroying the minds as wills of mortals, doing so to this particular one would have been a complete disaster for her plans.
Towa again pondered the situation she had created quietly. Pan was incredibly strong willed for a mortal, she had seen mortals far older than this child break for far less than what she had been through. However, it appeared even she had her limits. Towa couldn't afford to risk damaging her prize again, she had been fortunate Odianna had repaired some of the damage. Even now though, the risk to her plans was extreme: Pan was an unstable walking disaster waiting to happen. One did not just 'fix' a mental break of that degree that was magical in origin with an open ear, kind words, and hugs, ugh those thoughts were disgusting to even think for a demon.
Pan was not sound of mind anymore. That was for certain. The Pan that had entered the tournament would have questioned a number of things Odianna had said towards the end. Pan needed time to ground herself in order to become useful again. After all, Towa could hardly defy the gods with such a marred tool, and speaking of that tool...
She watched Pan walked out of the bathroom, appearing calm, cool, and collected. Only the tightening around her eyes, and the agony hiding inside of them, showed any hints of what had happened inside the bathroom, and inside her mind. Towa carefully stretched out with her magic, not to harm, but merely to gauge. She could feel all of Pan's mental walls beginning to restructure themselves with a rapidness that Towa had not foreseen. Her fortitude was still abysmal, but, perhaps Towa wasn't set back as much as she thought. In fact, the restructuring of them was different, in a more cold and calculated way, more like she had been at the end of her time lost in the dimensions...
Excellent...