THRUSHEAR
He'd made a lot of mistakes in his life, but he swore this wouldn't be one of them.
Thrushear almost loved him, but as LeafClan's hunger deepened, Sunstar became more and more of a stranger to him. And now, he was leading them all to their deaths. Signs, omens, dreams, good speeches… Nothing would help them defeat MeadowClan.
It just wasn't possible. They were at the peak of their strength, coming to every Gathering with a bushel of cats for every LeafClan warrior. And it was like Sunstar was deaf to him, shunning his nest for drawing battle plans in the dirt, and nothing he said could convince him to pull back from this path of destruction.
I did love you, he thought with one last glance back toward the Hollow Ash, slipping out the bramble tunnel with Bluenose beside him. The moon peered out from behind a dark curtain of clouds, thinly veiled as they raced through the frosted wood.
But he loved life more. All his clanmates he might lose. And his Hazelpaw.
Thrushear and Bluenose were both fathers now; maybe that was the difference. Those days he'd spent with Jaywind, when it felt like the entire world was crumbling down around the both of them, and they were the only two in the entire forest who might understand each other… He didn't know what it might have turned into, had things been different.
If Jaywind had come home. Or, if he'd gone back to MireClan with her.
Their shared pain, just apprentices when they both lost someone they loved during Rosestar's fall. They had found some little bit of solace together; he never thought it might mean he'd find her near-apprentice age kit on the border one day, his own spitting image.
He still remembered peeking his head into the medicine den to see his old hero again, now broken and imprisoned in his own camp. And he forced himself to remember.
To think he'd share his nest with Rowanstar's son, it surprised himself as much as anyone else. But when Rowanstar had stood over him in the poppies, pitiless, it was Sunfire who stood up for him and spoke up for his life. It was Sunfire who brought him along patrols when every cat shunned him, shared tongues and fresh-kill, and gave him an apprentice to train, and kept his trust in him.
So why couldn't he trust him now?
He forced himself to harden his heart, to remember Briarstalk, his mother and mentor. Shrikewing, his mother's brother, and their medicine cat, slaughtered by Sorreltail and the others on StarClan's sacred mount of peace.
Thrushear would miss LeafClan, but after everything that had happened, and everything that had to happen, he'd never be their clanmate again.
"StarClan will reward us for doing what we know was right," Bluenose assured him, as the burbling of water reached his ears. The border with MeadowClan.
At first, the figure was just a pair of golden eyes in the dark. A ginger dilute tortoiseshell stood in the icy water like it was nothing, waiting for them as they approached the water's edge. MeadowClan's own deputy, Morningsky, had been there as promised.
It was simple. Eliminate Sunstar before he threatened the border, and MeadowClan would have a home for them and their families both. And so they swore beneath the stars.
Thrushear woke one morning with a shudder, nearly frozen in his nest. It was cold and vacant beside him, in the indent where Sunstar normally slept. He was already outside, on the bough, choosing the war party.
Almost every warrior in camp, Thrushear reflected as he listed the names. Boulderstep the deputy, the senior warriors Owlswoop, Hawkwing, and Asterstripe, Sorreltail and Honeypad, Thrushear and Bluenose, Tansyslip, Mistpelt, Kestrelstrike, and Swiftstorm. Even the HillClan warrior Leekroot, who still looked and treated them like they were foxes, eating and sleeping separate from all the rest.
Not to mention the three rogues that Sunstar had managed to summon from Twolegplace, some old friends of his that he was brazen enough to trot out now. Their names were almost as vulgar as their appearance.
One of them, an ancient miscreant called Old Scratch, even batted Sunstar over the head in front of the entire Clan after Acornpaw led them in. Thrushear thought the warriors might tear the rogue to pieces then and there, but Sunstar shouted for calm, and Old Scratch was corralled into the medicine's den and kept like a prisoner until they figured out what to do with her.
That left only Quailtail, the queens Ryebreeze and Cloverfern and their kits, the elder Close-eye, old Murkpool, and most of the apprentices. But only most. Sunstar singled out Sedgepaw and Shadepaw to accompany them, as the other apprentices glared on with envious looks. Elmpaw the medicine cat apprentice, and his own apprentice Acornpaw.
Little Acornpaw, the runt of Beethorn's litter. As if there were any cat in LeafClan less fit to be in the middle of a battle. Sunstar really had gone mad.
"You are not to be part of the fighting, if it can be helped," Sunstar instructed them as he called their names. "I will rely on you to carry messages, help us hunt on MeadowClan territory, and assist Elmpaw with the wounded."
He only breathed a sigh of relief he hadn't selected Hazelpaw or Fleckpaw for this exercise in futility.
Murkpool blessed them all in turn as they prepared to leave, a pale sun climbing over the treetops as cats wished each other luck and exchanged long farewells. This would not be an ordinary raid, striking MeadowClan and retreating back over the river for a certain counter-attack. They'd live, and make camp, and lead the MeadowClan cats in a merry chase around the vast prairie they made their territory.
Foolishness. And he made it sound like a game. Thrushear said nothing, stomach sour as he wished his Hazelpaw well, and his apprentice Fleckpaw. Bluenose hardly left the nursery until every other cat in the raiding party was leaving out the bramble tunnel, as loath as he was to leave his precious Ryebreeze and Frostkit.
"Come back safe!" Cloverfern called after her littermates, Kestrelstrike and Mistpelt.
"I'm the last one you have to worry about," Kestrelstrike purred. "When I see you again, I'll line your nest with MeadowClan pelts."
Thrushear took a long moment to look over LeafClan camp for the final time, the old bramble thicket that stretched around the edge of the hollow, the old rowan and the hawthorn trees, and the great Hollow Ash in the center. And Hazelpaw, waiting by the apprentice's den, watching as his tail disappeared out of camp.
Farewell.
He did this for LeafClan, as much as he did it for himself.
They approached the riverbank as a war party this time, and the river was frozen over. All as Murkpool said it would be; a sign from StarClan, he argued. Sunstar padded ahead, Boulderstep, Sorreltail, and Owlswoop in a tight circle around him, voices low in indistinguishable conversation.
Sunstar stared out over the river as a light flurry kicked up, gentle drifts of snow falling from the bleak gray sky overhead. The meadows stretched on and on to the south, as far as the eye could see and beyond.
He walked to the river's edge, testing a paw on the frosted surface of the river. The ice creaked uneasily beneath his weight, but he took another, and another, and still the ice held.
"Fortunate for us," Sunstar mused, glancing back to Thrushear on the riverbank. "Thrushear, give me your thoughts. Don't you think our warriors will cut straight through the heart of MeadowClan?"
Thrushear felt his stomach churn, but didn't let it show on his face. "No doubt, if every LeafClan cat does their best," he murmured in answer.
"I don't doubt that, as long as our hearts are all set on the same goal." Sunstar cocked his head. "Don't you agree?"
"True," Bluenose said beside him, managing a false smile. "Those that were your father's enemies have become your friends, and serve you more loyally."
"So we have much to be thankful for," Sunstar agreed, carefully pawing his way back to solid earth on LeafClan's side of the border. He brushed his tail gently across Thrushear's side as he walked among his warriors. "Who could ask for more loyal warriors?"
Even with the twisting in his heart, Thrushear managed a smile too.
"You know your warriors would go to the ends of the world for you," he mewed.
"I judge them no less," Sunstar purred, gazing around, before his gaze settled on his deputy. "Boulderstep, before we set off, we'll take Old Scratch with us. I suspect it was just a moment's passion that set her off when she clawed me, and we'll need her fierceness on the battlefield. I understand this is how she says hello."
Thrushear bristled now. "That's merciful, but reckless," he argued. "Punish the rogue, so the others won't follow her example."
Sunstar turned his eye back on him now. "Oh, but let's be merciful."
"Show mercy," Bluenose interjected with a flick of his ears, "but punish her too."
"You show great mercy if you give her life, after the taste of correction," Thrushear added.
Their leader just gently shook his head. "Your abundant love and care for me make a tough case against this poor wretch," he mewed, brushing his tail along Thrushear's flank again. "She only hit me, and I've had worse. I forgive her, even though my loyal clanmates would have her punished out of love for me…"
He glanced around, fixing Thrushear with his uneven stare for a moment, and Thrushear felt his guts turn to snakes. "Yes, Bluenose, Thrushear… Know that I know your worthiness."
Bluenose, as smiling and smooth-faced as he'd been until now like nothing was wrong, shuffled his paws. Thrushear glanced down, and away.
Their leader's gaze didn't leave them. "What? Is there something wrong, my love?" Thrushear tried to manage another smile for him, but Sunstar's eyes had converted to cold fire now, and the smile died on his lips. The warrior glanced around as Owlswoop lowered into a pouncing stance, Boulderstep moving menacingly forward, Sorreltail's eyes pure poison between the ranks of warriors.
How do they know? He could see it in every one of their faces. Thrushear glanced around helplessly, backing up over the ice.
Bluenose realized the act was up too. "I confess my fault, and submit myself to your mercy," he said quaveringly. "I'm your sister's mate, Sunstar…"
Thrushear's mouth had gone dry. "I never meant to—"
"The mercy that was quick in me, by your advice, is suppressed and killed," Sunstar hissed, advancing toward them both now. "You must not dare, for shame, talk of mercy now!"
Owlswoop and Boulderstep leapt at Bluenose, wrestling him to the ground as Sunstar tackled Thrushear to the ice, the wet cold plastering his fur as he was knocked abruptly off his paws.
"See, warriors, these LeafClan fox-hearts," he growled as Thrushear struggled to his feet again, paws sliding and slipping on the ice. "What shall I say to you, Thrushear, you cruel, ungrateful, savage creature…!"
Teeth sank into his scruff and hurled him back toward land, and now Sunstar's weight was pinning him to the frosted grass. The hideous scarred face leered over him, contorted with rage, claws gripping around his face and forcing him to stare into the LeafClan leader's mismatched eyes.
"You who kept all my counsels, that knew the very bottom of my soul, would you betray me out of fear?" Sunstar snarled. "It's so strange that the truth stands in front of me in black and white, but my eye can scarcely see it. So constant and so unspotted, you seemed. I will weep for you."
Thrushear forced his eyes close as the tears began to well. "I'm sorry. Forgive me."
Sunstar's eyes were pitiless. "May StarClan quit you in their mercy. Hear your sentence: you have conspired against your leader, joined with our enemies, and from their mouth, received the order for my murder. You would have sold me to slaughter, my clanmates to starvation, and our entire Clan into desolation! Therefore I send you poor, miserable wretches to your deaths, and may StarClan deliver the judgment you deserve."
Boulderstep stooped down at Sunstar's signal, sinking his teeth into Bluenose's throat. His tail twitched, legs kicking, but he was helpless beneath the deputy's power, as his brother Asterstripe watched without a flash of pity in his eyes.
I'm sorry, Hazelpaw. I'm sorry, Sunstar.
Jaws snapped around his throat, lifting him clear off the ground, and flung him toward the frozen river. Thrushear felt himself crash over the top of the ice, and through. A cold shock spread through his body, all sound and vision swallowed up by darkness, as the black waters swept him away beneath the ice.