Chapter 20: Brain Glitch.
"Things die. That's part of life. It's bad to kill, but it's not bad to die."
-"The Iron Giant"
Vervain was not the only rabbit travelling alone; Campion was also aimlessly wandering. Watership Down, Efrafa and the canal were far away; he had gone further than the usual range of the wide patrols and could not recognize any familiar landmarks.
He stopped in the middle of a field and stood on his hind legs to look at the sky. The thunderstorm was still raging in the area. Ever since his encounter with the Black Rabbit of Inlé the previous day, he had been thinking. There was only one logical explanation for what had happened, and he didn't like it at all.
Suddenly, a bolt of lightning struck Campion's left ear. His body was filled with a burning sensation for a moment, then it was over. Unaware of anything happening around him, he collapsed and fell unconscious.
When he woke up, the place he was in seemed vaguely familiar: it was the same arid desert where he had first met the Black Rabbit of Inlé. Campion shook his head, refusing to believe this.
In front of him, the air was slowly turning black. The darkness arranged itself into a familiar shape.
-"CAMPION, WHY ARE YOU BACK HERE?"
-"Black Rabbit, I've been thinking."
-"WHAT ABOUT?"
-"About our previous encounter. Supposedly I had died before my time and you therefore sent me back to the real world to finish my life."
-"THAT IS AN OVERSIMPLIFICATION, BUT ESSENTIALLY TRUE. AND NOW YOU DIED AGAIN!"
-"No. I am not dead. You see, Black Rabbit, I am still alive. Yesterday, I was hit by some sort of boat. Today, I got struck by lightning. Don't you see, Black Rabbit? I suffered physical trauma my body cannot handle, causing my mind to fluctuate and see things that aren't really there. I'm not dead, I'm just going crazy."
-"ARE YOU TELLING ME THAT I AM NOT REALLY HERE AND ALL THIS IS IN YOUR MIND?"
-"I'll quote you: this is an oversimplification, but essentially true."
-"I SHALL HAVE TO GET THIS RIDICULOUS IDEA OUT OF YOUR HEAD. LOOK TO YOUR LEFT."
Campion turned; he could see a faint brown spot far in the distance. The spot seemed to grow larger as it approached him. He soon realized that this was a rabbit, floating closer and closer to him, with a look of terror on its face, until he stopped right in front of him.
-"DOES THIS RABBIT LOOK FAMILIAR?" the Black Rabbit asked.
The rabbit still looked terrified. He turned around to try to run away, but remained in the same place. He kept floating over the same spot, moving his paws in all directions and at one point flipping over on his back. But he could not get away, as if held by an invisible force. All the time, he was squealing in terror. Campion sniffed him.
-"Why is he screaming like this?" Campion shouted.
-"I'LL TAKE CARE OF HIM."
The Black Rabbit of Inlé raised one of its front paws and touched the rabbit with it. He continued to struggle and his mouth was wide open, but no sound came out of it.
-"It's nice to have some silence again. Anyway, this rabbit is an Efrafan. I don't know why he's so afraid of me, though, I always tried to be a friend to the slaves and the outskirters."
-"YOU WEREN'T MUCH OF A FRIEND TO THIS ONE. YOU WERE ON THE PATROL THAT CAPTURED HIM WHEN HE TRIED TO RUN AWAY. HOW MANY RABBITS DID YOU ACTUALLY HELP ESCAPE WHEN YOU WERE STILL IN EFRAFA?"
Campion fell silent; he knew very well that the answer to the Black Rabbit's question was "none", but he was too ashamed to admit it.
-"I've encountered many rabbits when I was in Efrafa. I can't seem to recall this one," he finally said, trying to change the subject.
-"DOES THE NAME BLACKAVAR SOUND FAMILIAR?"
-"Let me think...is he the rabbit who escaped with Hazel and the outsiders? Not pretty little Primrose, the other one?"
-"THREE THINGS. ONE: YOU ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE DEAD YET, SO YOU ARE THE OUTSIDER HERE. TWO: STOP BOTHERING ME WITH ROMANCE. THREE: YES, HE IS THE RABBIT YOU DESCRIBE. HE WAS KILLED BY A CAT YESTERDAY."
-"That's unfortunate. But why are you showing him to me?"
-"TO PROVE TO YOU THAT THIS IS REALLY HAPPENING AND NOT A BRAIN GLITCH."
Campion hopped over to Blackavar, who was still struggling silently.
-"That doesn't prove anything. I could be imagining his presence, just like I'm imagining yours."
He raised his front paw and moved it towards Blackavar.
-"DON'T TOUCH HIM!"
But it was too late; Campion's paw was already on Blackavar's back. He was immediately filled with an extremely unpleasant sensation of cold, darkness, despair and fear. It was unlike anything
he had ever experienced before. Worst of all, his paw seemed solidly anchored to Blackavar: he was unable to remove it.
-"OH, GOOD JOB!" the Black Rabbit shouted sarcastically.
Campion finally managed to remove his paw, but as he looked at it, he realized its underside was completely black; he tried rubbing his paws together, but it didn't go away.
-"The eyes, the ears and the nose can be fooled, but touch doesn't lie...you mean I'm really dead? This is all really happening?"
-"ABSOLUTELY."
Campion remained silent for a few moments, processing this new information.
-"You were right, I shouldn't have touched him," he eventually said. "Now I've got that nasty stain on my paw."
-"THAT'S NOT THE MAIN REASON WHY I DIDN'T WANT YOU TO TOUCH HIM. IT'S JUST AN UNFORTUNATE SIDE EFFECT."
-"What is the main reason then?"
-"YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE DEAD, BUT HE IS. IF I AM TO SEND YOU BACK TO THE WORLD OF THE LIVING, I WILL HAVE TO SEND HIM TOO. I WISH IT WASN'T THIS WAY, BUT IT'S ONE OF THE MANY COMPLEXITIES OF DEATH. EITHER WAY, I WILL HAVE TO ARRANGE A SECOND DEATH FOR HIM AT SOME POINT IN THE FUTURE. I HAVEN'T HAD TO DO THAT IN OVER FIVE THOUSAND YEARS, SO I'M A LITTLE RUSTY."
-"How many years?" Campion was confused by the large number.
-"IT DOESN'T MATTER. NOW, IF YOU WILL EXCUSE ME FOR A MOMENT, I HAVE TO DEAL WITH MY ASSISTANT."
The Black Rabbit raised one of his front paws to scratch behind his ear. As he did that, Campion's vision went blank. He could not see anything, no matter which way he looked. However, he could still hear, smell and move normally.
-"Now, Black Rabbit," a rabbit said, "as you know it's fu Inlé on the night of the full moon. My time serving in your owsla is over. I demand that you set me free."
-"FINALLY," the Black Rabbit said with a sigh. "YOU'VE BEEN ONE OF THE LEAST PRODUCTIVE BLACK EMISSARIES IN A LONG TIME. I HOPE YOU BROUGHT YOUR REPLACEMENT WITH YOU?"
-"What? Oh, him. I left him back at the Meadow. Now can you just give me my reward?"
-"YOU DON'T DESERVE ANY REWARD FOR YOUR SLOPPY WORK, BUT THE RULES ARE THE RULES, SO YOU SHALL GET ONE ANYWAY."
Campion then heard plenty of seemingly random noises. Soon after they had stopped, his vision came back; the rabbit he had heard was nowhere to be seen; only Blackavar and the Black Rabbit were still there.
-"SORRY FOR THIS INTERRUPTION," the Black Rabbit said. "REGARDLESS OF HOW DIFFICULT IT MIGHT BE FOR ME, I WILL HAVE TO SEND BOTH OF YOU BACK TO THE WORLD OF THE LIVING. TO MAKE SURE YOU DON'T DIE AGAIN, CAMPION, I SHALL SEND A THIRD RABBIT WITH YOU TO PROTECT YOU."
The Black Rabbit scratched his ear again. Suddenly, in a puff of smoke, another rabbit appeared. He seemed to be running and absent-mindedly looking at his surroundings, but as soon as his paws touched the ground he found himself slipping, and collapsed further away.
-"Uh, who are you?" he asked as he got up. "Are you the Black Rabbit of Inlé?"
-"YES. AND SINCE YOU ARE THE LAST RABBIT TO DIE ON THE NIGHT OF THE FULL MOON FU INLÉ, YOU HAVE TO SERVE IN MY OWSLA UNTIL THE NEXT FULL MOON. YOUR JOB WILL BE TO PROTECT THIS RABBIT SO HE STAYS ALIVE. ANY QUESTIONS?"
-"Woah, you talk fast, but you seem to make sense. Can I meet this rabbit?"
-"OF COURSE. IF YOU BECOME GOOD FRIENDS, SO MUCH THE BETTER. HE'S RIGHT BEHIND YOU."
The rabbit turned, and gasped in shock as he saw him.
-"Captain Campion, is that you sir?"
-"Yes. You look familiar...are you Corporal Aspen?"
-"You remember me! It's great to meet you again, Campion sir, I just wish we weren't both dead..."
-"IF YOU TWO DON'T MIND, HAVE THIS DISCUSSION ELSEWHERE. I HAVE OTHER THINGS TO WORRY ABOUT, SUCH AS BLACKAVAR HERE."
With that, bright red beams of light emerged from the Black Rabbit's eyes, each one striking one of the two rabbits and teleporting them back to the world of the living, leaving nothing but smoke where they used to be. He then turned to Blackavar.
-"CALM DOWN AND GET USED TO IT. ONCE CAMPION DIES FOR REAL, YOU WILL HAVE TO SPEND ALL ETERNITY WITH HIM. OH, AND HERE'S YOUR VOICE BACK. USE IT FOR POSITIVE PURPOSES, NOT TO ANNOY OTHERS."
He touched Blackavar again. The dead rabbit, despite having calmed down somewhat since Campion's disappearance, was still breathing fast.
-"Can I be alive again now?"
-"NOT YET! LIKE I TOLD CAMPION, THIS IS A VERY COMPLICATED PROCESS. WHILE I MAKE THE NECESSARY ARANGEMENTS, YOU WILL STAY HERE IN THE SHADOWLANDS. YOU'LL PROBABLY BE ALIVE AGAIN TOMORROW."
Blackavar looked like he was about to cry.
-"Can I at least go to the Meadow until then?"
The Black Rabbit sighed.
-"I SUPPOSE YOU CAN."
-"Oh thank you Black Rabbit. I'm so grate..."
Before he could finish his sentence, Blackavar was teleported away from the Shadowlands to the Meadow, where he crashed in a patch of clover. He started to nibble it; being dead wasn't so bad after all.