All I Want For Christmas – Chapter 11
Elizabeth was determined to listen without interrupting to what Julie had to say, aware that she needed to get the whole story if she was to advise her sister but found herself frustrated by her waffling. Julie's voice was faltering as she tried to find the words she needed and even when she did manage to speak it was as though she was voicing to herself the turmoil going on inside her head rather than explaining where the problem lay.
"Take a deep breath Julie and start again please. Has Tom said something unkind to you? Done something? One moment you seemed so close and now you're barely saying a word to each other."
Julie nodded then looked down at her hands, tears threatening to spill from her eyes as she tried to speak again.
"Why is this happening now? It's just so unfair!", she wailed again.
With that she rose quickly and ran from the room, her hand drawn across her face as if trying to hide the emotions she was battling within herself.
Elizabeth was worried, the implication that something unsavoury had occurred between Jack's brother and her sister difficult for her to accept. She needed to speak with Tom, find out from him what had happened.
She could hear the murmur of conversation down the hallway as she stepped out of her mother's sitting room, which had been the closest place for a private conversation to where she had found Julie pacing up and down the hallway appearing distressed. She paused for a moment wondering how best to broach the subject with Tom but then she had another thought.
Would this not be better if it was a conversation had between two men? Perhaps Tom would be more open to a discussion with Nathan rather than herself. After all, she was the widow of his brother and that may make it more difficult for him to speak freely. At least about her sister and especially if something untoward had happened for she was certain that whatever it may be must have been a misunderstanding.
Yes, she decided, I will ask Nathan to have a quiet word with him and find out what is going on. It can't be that bad, surely.
As she entered the drawing room she noticed that Tom was not joining in the conversation, remaining strangely quiet and detached from the company in front of him. On his face was a look of worried confusion, one she had seen a few times during the Christmas meal from both him and Julie. It was only when she returned from saying goodnight to the children that she noticed Julie had left the room and decided to find her.
Now everyone was gathered by the fireplace drinking coffee and listening to her father discuss the purchase he had recently concluded, which she knew was the very block of buildings that he had been pointing out to Lionel only a few nights earlier as being of interest to him. If her brother-in-law had made the connection to the conversation as they left the church he was doing a good job of hiding that fact.
Moving across to stand beside Nathan she touched his arm gently, in a way that made him realise she wanted his attention. He placed his hand over hers and looking down at her raised a questioning eyebrow.
"I need to talk to you about something", she whispered. "Can we make an excuse for a moment alone?"
He waited for a pause in conversation before quickly saying, "If everyone will excuse us, it seems our son wishes to say goodnight again."
As soon as they were out in the hallway Elizabeth explained her concern to him. "I may be making something out of nothing here. I know how dramatic Julie can be and perhaps Tom has told her that he isn't interested. But I just have a feeling that we need to find out what is going on. Or am I just being an interfering older sister?"
Nathan gave her a comforting smile, trying to ease the concern she was clearly feeling. "You have always been good at trusting your instincts Elizabeth so if you think there is something going on then you are right to help because judging by the looks on both of their faces they are not getting anywhere at sorting it themselves. What do you need me to do?"
"I think that perhaps Tom may open up a bit more to you than me. To him I am Jack's widow and I know that he treads carefully around me out of kindness as he doesn't want to do or say anything that may be upsetting. So I thought maybe you could ask him?"
Sensibly Nathan should have refused to get involved in a Thatcher problem, new as he was to the family. But his own instincts told him that something was amiss and it was not going to be fixed unless somebody stepped up to bridge the divide that was threatening to grow bigger between Julie and Tom.
"Okay, let me see what I can find out. Why don't you go after Julie and see if she will speak to you again".
Upstairs in the nursery Allie was settling down for a few hours of reading before going to bed. She was in heaven with the huge selection of books here, something she had disclosed to her new grandfather when speaking with him a few days prior. She could still picture how he had swept his arm around the room, taking in the bookshelves along one wall as he told her that she could take whichever of the books they held back with her to Hope Valley at the end of their visit.
"A whole year's worth if that is your wish", were his exact words. "Then you can change them all over next Christmas, which I hope you will once again be spending with us."
She too hoped that it may be repeated for it had been a wonderful time and somehow amidst all the festivities they had enjoyed she had still managed to read two books. Suddenly remembering that she needed to return them to the shelves she made her way to the door, wishing to get that done so that she could begin choosing a selection to take with her when they left.
Voices outside the door made her stop and wait to make her exit, for she was in no hurry to become caught up in a conversation with anyone right now. She could hear Aunt Viola speaking with cousin Arthur, a boy Allie considered very well mannered but rather dull. In truth, she felt sorry for him. Having so many rules and expectations to live up to meant that he seemed to have never been allowed to just enjoy being a boy.
She found herself wondering what her parents would say if she suggested they take him back to Hope Valley so that she could introduce him to all the fun things her friends got up to. But then she stopped herself, feeling the sadness that had hit her in recent weeks as she realised it would not be possible as they were not going to be back there themselves for very long.
Arthur's voice was clear even through the closed door. He was explaining to his mother how he had approached the constable, requesting his permission to court the "love of his life". None of it made sense to her until his final words, "I wish to marry Allie, mother, and even if I have to wait a long time I am prepared to do that."
Stifling the gasp that almost escaped her lips she shrank back against the wall behind the door, trying to convince herself that she had misheard what was said. But no, it was definitely her name that he had spoken.
She felt so many emotions at once that for a moment she was overwhelmed by them all.
Surprise…Embarrassment…Amusement…Horror. She didn't know whether to laugh or cry.
But at the forefront of her thinking was the realisation that she had to work out a way to make sure that she didn't let the boy know that he had been found out. In a strange way she admired his confidence. Still waters run deep, she thought. But how could she make him see that he was chasing something that could never be? Then a face came to mind and she knew whose name to drop into her conversation, to let him know that her heart was taken by another. She would speak about Robert in a way that left him in no doubt.
Finally the voices grew softer and when she heard the sound of a door closing further along the hallway she hurried out and into her own room. Tomorrow, she thought. I will think of what to say and let him down gently. And no-one must ever find out that I know for it would be too cruel to Lionel if they did.
Under the pretence of wanting someone to accompany him down to the stables to check on the ponies William and Grace had given each of their grandchildren for Christmas, Nathan approached Tom and suggested that he may wish some night air.
Little Jack had been particularly excited by the gift and desperate to learn to ride he had wanted to begin immediately but Nathan had managed to persuade him that mornings were best and they would begin lessons the following day. How they would manage the horses and everything else they had ahead of them was another matter.
But for now this offered him an excuse to have a private conversation with Tom and he waited until they were out of earshot of the house before he stopped the other man with a cadence to his voice that made it obvious there was something they needed to discuss.
"I couldn't help but notice a slightly strained mood between yourself and Julie this evening. Is there anything you would like to talk about. I'm told I am a good listener."
Tom said nothing, not sure whether he wished to discuss the matter with anyone other than Julie but then it struck him that perhaps Nathan was the right person from whom to seek advice. He would undoubtedly have experienced similar when he began to court Elizabeth and when he remembered what Jack had said about the tussle he had fought between being accepted and staying his own man he imagined Nathan would have felt the same.
"There is a lot to take in." He pointed his hand back towards the house and then in a sweeping arc that took in the stables and gardens. "I am not used to all of this. This grandeur. It means nothing to me, Julie is all I care about".
Nathan understood exactly what Tom was saying. There was something quite daunting about the wealth of the Thatcher family and the life they led. Yet despite having been brought up with all of this their two youngest daughters clearly preferred to live in a world so very different to what society had set out for them.
"Have you told Julie that?", he asked, trying to keep his voice casual to allow Tom to lead the conversation.
"I tried to this afternoon. I am sure it will come as no surprise to you that William Thatcher drew me aside last night to have a talk about my future."
Nathan gave a chuckle, beginning to realise what the problem may be between Tom and Julie.
"And I am guessing you said no to his job offer and that is why Julie is upset with you?"
Tom gave a stifled laugh, "Au contraire. If only it was that easy. I didn't even have a chance to tell her what my decision was. She became upset and ran away from me. Since then she won't even make eye contact, let alone speak. I need to explain things to her but I don't know how I can do that if she won't listen."
Nathan placed his hand on the other man's shoulder and turned him back towards the house. "Come on, that is exactly what you should be doing now. I promise we will get her to talk to you."
Elizabeth had found Julie in her room, sitting in the chair by the window with only the one lamp lit to cast any light. The temperature was cold and as she entered she moved across to stoke the embers in the fire and add some more logs to boost the flames.
"You will catch your death in here Julie. You do know that a problem shared is a problem halved so perhaps if you were to tell me what is troubling you I may be able to help you find the answer?"
Julie looked up at her, the shadows of the room making her face appear even more distressed. She turned to stare out of the window and Elizabeth waited, knowing she would speak when she was ready.
Finally she did. "Father has offered Tom a job here in Hamilton, which I am sure will come as no surprise to you as I know he did the same to Jack and no doubt Nathan. I know he means well but it will ruin everything!"
When she said nothing more Elizabeth prompted her to continue. "And did Tom say whether he had accepted the offer?"
"I don't know but I am sure he has. Just when I thought things were working out perfectly."
"I am confused Julie. Tom is certainly better suited to working for father than either Jack or Nathan would ever have been. He is a businessman after all. Surely him being here would give you the opportunity to spend time together, to get to know each other more. What is wrong with that?"
"What is wrong with that?" Julie almost spat out the words but then her voice became calm again. "What is wrong with that is I will not be here in Hamilton."
Elizabeth was surprised by her sister's outburst but kept her own voice gentle. "And where exactly will you be if not here?"
"I have been offered an apprenticeship with one of this country's foremost artists, Emily Carr. I was going to tell everyone this evening but then my conversation with Tom changed all that."
She paused for a moment and when she spoke again Elizabeth had a feeling that her mind had travelled somewhere far away, that she was seeing her dream right there in front of her as though she could reach out and touch it.
"Her work is incredible, Elizabeth. She uses natural landscapes and people as her inspiration and it is like poetry on canvas the way she uses paint to tell a story. She has never taken anyone under her guidance before but my art teacher is a friend of hers and sent her my portfolio for appraisal. Apparently she was impressed enough to suggest that I come and work with her. Learn from her. Can you believe that?"
There was an intensity in the way Julie spoke, an enthusiasm for what this meant to her that Elizabeth had never seen before. This was her calling and clearly she was passionate about it.
"Then you must do it. It is what you have dreamt of for so long. But let me get this straight. You would not be in Hamilton whereas Tom would be? But surely you cannot be going so far away that it would be impossible to meet up sometime? Perhaps you could come home at weekends?"
Julie began to laugh. "That is just it. Emily Carr has her studio in Victoria, British Columbia. Still some way from Vancouver but at least on the same side of the country. But the distance between there and Hamilton is just too great to make it possible for us!"
Elizabeth let out a huge sigh of relief before walking over to take hold of her sister's hand and pull her out of the chair.
"Come on, enough of this self pity. The thing you need to do right now is talk with him, see if he wants to work it out as there is bound to be an answer. Don't be foolish like me and waste time by not letting him know how you feel. You risk missing out on so much."