Disclaimer: Bonesboy15 doesn't own Helluva Boss or Naruto. The following is a written work of fan-fiction. It contains adult language and situations. Reader discretion is advised.

Who's That Father?

Glamazon

(Then: Gluttony, Hellhound Heights)

It should have been a quiet morning when Naruto awoke. 'Should' was the operative term in that sentence. It was his twenty-first year walking in the Ring, the second year spent in his new house, and he'd already told his new Personal Assistant that he planned on a day off. Alright, maybe he'd step in and spend an hour or two in the office at most. To ensure he took it easy, he even went so far as to turn his usual alarm off.

So, what was it that woke him and made the day out to be a headache? He smelled something burning. Yeah, it's Hell, but while the Hellhound had a decent fire resistance going for him, his belongings did not. The gas line connected to the house did not.

Alarmed by the strong smell of unnatural, uncontrolled fire, Naruto threw himself from the bed and tore down to the kitchen. He had to stop and take in his discovery. His three and a half year old puppy stood atop the stove in her pickle-covered pajamas – as if that wasn't concerning enough – specifically, atop a lit and active burner. Beside another lit and active burner, but that one had a pot on it, the water within boiled and threatened to spill over, and whatever was in that was getting over cooked.

Oh, and his puppy's paw pads – as most Hellhound pads were akin to fucking asphalt, able to withstand most intense heat sources without issue and possibly even ignore it, but that was when they were grown – were probably warping the metal atop the burner. If not melted to it.

"Himawari, what the fuck are you doing?!" Naruto shrieked, eyes wide as he tried to comprehend what he saw. His pup looked at him with a wide smile and her cute, little bushy tail started to wag.

"Wari make Dad-Dee brake fest cough fee!" She proclaimed, chipper as can be. It would be absolutely heartwarming, if not for the "Happy Berf-Day, Dad-Dee!"

"Oh, Pickle...All you did was shave a few years off Daddy's life." Naruto whimpered before he rushed over to grab his puppy from her current dangerous scenario. With the grinning pup in hand, another turned off the stove. He then ran his pup to the guest's bathroom and practically kicked the door down – he could always buy a new one, just like he would the stove; he'd never be able to cook at that one again, the sight of his puppy standing on the burner's fire peering into a boiling pot was now etched into his memory – to get the puppy's paws to the sink. Cold water rushed on and steam rose up from his pup's paws, and she whined at the temperature her feet were not resistant to.

He carefully examined her pads for any cracks, tears or boils that might have formed from the heat. Thankfully, there was none. With her feet and safety assured, he sat his pup down on the toilet with the lid down, and held her shoulders.

"Baby–! Himawari. You had the best intentions, sweetie, but you can not fucking cook without Daddy or Grump." He growled at her. Himawari's ears flattened and her feet kicked uncomfortably as they air dried. She whined and he closed his eyes. "Yes, baby girl, you're in trouble. This can't happen again. Do you understand what Daddy's saying?"

"Wari...Wari bad girl?"

"No, hey. I didn't say that." Naruto frowned and then sighed when his puppy started to whimper. Her eyes welled up with the beginnings of tears. Shit. He smiled at her to try and forgo this part of childrearing. He cupped her cheek and leaned forward to nuzzle her head. "Oh, Pickle, no. Don't start that. You just made a mistake. A very, very big mistake. Fuck, baby girl, you could've really hurt yourself! What were you thinking?!"

"Wari bad girl!" Himawari wailed. Naruto sighed and picked her up to walk her away from the bathroom. Well, if this taught part of the lesson he needed to teach, he'd live with the tantrum. Only for a few minutes, though. He would've preferred not dealing with this at all if he could've managed it.

"Fuck it, whatever." He huffed and nuzzled her head as she cried in his arms. "Shh, you're okay, baby girl. It's okay. We'll go out and have some waffles at The Bowl, huh? Yeah? That sound good?" He cooed as his puppy's cries quieted and she nuzzled into his shoulder. "Yeah, I thought you'd like that. After waffles, Daddy's taking you out to buy a brand new stove. Daddy will let you pick the color – No, wait. You might figure out the burner controls again if I do that. How'd you even fuckin' know how to start the last one?"

Alas, that was a question he would never receive the answer to.

(Now: Gluttony, Mountainside Tunnels)

Life under the mountains of Gluttony was... different than Vortex was used to. When he was taken from Bee's place by a hot little blue-furred vixen that introduced herself as Krystal – seriously, the things he'd do to that ass if he were able to; and if Bee's scent was anything to go by, she agreed with his thoughts on his 'reclaimer' – he expected to be put to work in a slave camp or something along those lines. A life of torment and torture, insult and ridicule to make him suffer in Bee's stead. It's what he'd heard happened to some demons that crossed the wrong nobles in the name of others. One Hellhound in particular, Evets, came to mind; he was pretty sure that guy was going to die a lonely, party-less death in Mammon's mines.

Anyway, Vortex's life wasn't...actually much different. He was given some weird clothes that folded over a lot and allowed for a breeze between the knees, despite the loose pants he had to wear. It was almost like he was wearing the same kind of goofy pajamas his father used to wear when he was a pup. Just less...patterned.

Then, he was given lessons. Lessons in fighting. When he was told he was going to be taught how to fight, Vortex scoffed and argued that he could fight. The unamused Krystal – who was still hot and apparently unaffected by his charm; talk about being thrown for a loop – promptly had him eating dirt in two seconds. He couldn't even blink. He argued he was used to modern combat, with firearms and even when they supplied him with a pistol – decent make, not too small in his hand and had a caliber that most Wild Things used in their sidearms – he still got his ass handed to him.

After the fourth time he was tossed head over ass to the ground, Krystal enlightened him while she held his arm in a lock behind his back.

"To fill the role we wish to put you in, you must be an efficient killer. You, Vortex Nubis, are adequate at taking lives, at best." The hot blue vixen purred into his ear, sending all sorts of fires through his body. She had to know that she was doing so. "And until you can land on your feet, we will do this over and over again."

This was week three of Vortex getting his ass handed to him in a fight by a demoness not even half his size. It would be one thing if it were Bee, she was a Sin, but this...Kitsu-ne? Vortex's Pride was starting to lose its patience, and he was right there behind it. As the stars cleared from his head, Krystal was talking again.

"I don't know why Lord Kurama took you. The Ninth Tale is a vastly superior specimen; even Bee-Lzebub saw that." Oh, this bitch did not just go there. Vortex growled and pushed himself to his feet. "He should've claimed the Ninth then and there. Honestly, I'd have more fun pinning myself against him again. He's really filled out since I last saw him...I wonder if the rumors about growing Hellhounds is true."

What? No, no way Naruto wouldn't tell him about meeting a Kitsu-Ne, let alone one as fucking hot as the one currently kicking his ass. He knew how much Vortex appreciated hearing about someone's game. Unless it was about a one-night meetup that involved a lot of alcohol and reminiscing about their mutual dead ex prior to the smaller of the two – at the time – proving to be a more adamant and ruthless top than the latter.

...Shit, did he know about my anal g-spot before Bee? That's a weird revelation to have right now. Vortex blinked a few times and then groaned as his legs rolled back to the ground. "I think I have a concussion."

A pretty blue-furred vixen popped into his line of sight. Thin claws held his bad eye's eyelid open and she peered into it.

"Hm, a mild one at worst." Krystal hummed before she released his eye. Then her foot nudged into his left arm. "Off your ass. We're going again."

"...Can't we just cuddle?"

"I would require satisfaction before I would demean myself to cuddle with you, Nubis." Krystal smirked before she went deadfaced again and kicked his shoulder. He rolled with the hit and pushed himself to his feet, bearing a snarl. The vixen huffed. "Good, still some fight in you. Maybe another week of sobriety will get the rest of it out of your system."

"Rest of what?" Vortex growled.

"Complacency." The vixen sneered back before she flicked her hand to his right. A heel caught him in the jaw on his blind side and he was sent sprawling across the ground. He groaned again as his vision flickered. A smaller blue Kitsu-Ne scampered out of view to stop in front of Krystal, who smiled down at it and rested a hand on its head. The blue Kit looked back at him, bright blue eyes locked on his form.

"If you weren't so excessively complacent, the heiress wouldn't have caught you by surprise. You have ears, Nubis. You have a nose. You rely too much on your eye and some unearned belief in your meager skill...You can thank the Sin for that."

"Don't...talk...about...Fuck." Whatever else Vortex was going to say was lost as the concussion won out and bile raced up his esophagus. The loss of consciousness followed suit, and gravity – because As Above, So Below – pulled his body down. In the back of his mind, Vortex really hoped that he didn't land in his puke.

(Pride, I.M.P. Main Office)

"Job well done team!" Blitzø praised as he and his fellow Imps walked in through their Grimoire-provided portal, which closed with a snap behind them, almost catching one of the Imp's tails as he staggered through. He looked at his secretary with a grin on his face. "Alright, Loona, we're back. Mark us up for another successful hit–Loona?"

The desk his girl usually sat at was vacant. The Grimoire they used in plain view, able to be snatched by anyone or anything. Then who–? A lavender pair of ears popped up from behind the computer, and Millie squealed.

"Oh, it's the puppy!" She cried and darted over to stand on Loona's chair and pull the little thing into a hug. The pup's tail started wagging and she returned the embrace with a happy giggle.

"Hi, Miss Millie!"

"Oh, sweetheart, I'm happy t' see ya here again! We were all so worried about you," Millie said. Blitzø arched a brow and looked at Moxxie, who had his hands folded behind him and a...neutral(?) frown on his face. Blitzø elbowed his sharpshooter and nodded at the pup.

"I wasn't worried. Were you worried about her?" He asked softly.

"Given her lineage, no. Not really." Moxxie drawled. He glanced back up at Blitzø. "And it's because of that lineage I suggest you go hide, sir. Before you do something else to get us attacked by The Imp Eater."

"It was one fucking time and I was the one that got attacked! He barely fucking touched you or Millie!"

"Sir, he used my wife as a Satan-damned body shield!"

"Oh, cry me a fuckin' river, Mox! You could've done so much worse!" Blitzø argued. He grabbed Moxxie's lapels when the little shit rolled his eyes. "Listen to me, you little fuck! I'm the boss around here and if anyone's getting the last word in this fucking argument, it's me!"

"Well, the smoothie machine was fucking broken again, Squirt, so I grabbed you some juice instead – how the fuck did you all get back?!" Loona snapped as she walked in from outside the office with a latte in one hand and bags from that shitty fast food joint Buzzy's in the other. The puppy yipped and jumped out of Millie's arms to go accost her for the bag. Loona growled at her as she jumped at the food in her hand. "Hey, no! Down, get down! Squirt, you agreed to be quiet in the meeting room while you worked on the cup! This is not being quiet nor are you in the fucking meeting room!"

"But-but Miss Loona–!" The puppy whined until she started to cough, like, a lot. Loona's eyes went wide and she shoved the food into Blitzø's arms, grabbed the pup and carried her to the meeting room with hurried strides.

"Fuck–! Dammit Heema, this is why I wanted you to stay put!" She growled before she looked back at him over her shoulder. "Dad, bring the food, would ya?"

"Coming, Loony!" Blitzø practically sang as he followed his Hellhound with her bags of food. He rarely ever heard her call him that! Whenever he did, it made his heart do weird floaty things that made him feel lighter than air. It was like being high! Only, somehow, clearer! That wonderful feeling lasted until the second he walked into their meeting room. When his eyes went to the table and all the craft materials on it. "What the fu–?! Who made this fucking mess?!"

"I'll ..ugh, I'll fuckin clean it, just set the food down!" Loona growled at him from where she knelt by the kid's bag and pulled some kind of dispenser out. She held it up to the puppy's tiny muzzle while she cradled her jaw. "Alright, Squirt, this'll only take a second. You know the drill. On three, breathe in. Hold for four and then we're done. You ready?"

The puppy gave a quick nod before the dispenser was set in place, two prongs slid into her little nose and a small mask around them sealed the muzzle. A soft whine slipped out of the puppy's mouth and Loona let out a small, well, not a growl, but Blitzø hadn't ever heard that sound from his adopted daughter before. Loona counted to three then pressed a button on the dispenser. A thick gaseous substance filled the mask and the puppy took a deep breath until it was gone.

"Hold it, hold it...Okay, that shit's done." Loona assured the puppy as she put the device away. Once she did, she gave the puppy a hug – That lucky little bitch! Was Blitzø's gut reaction; he'd kill to have Loona hug him like that! Followed by a mantra of: I am not jealous of a Hellpup! – and whispered, "Great job, Squirt. Only two more days of that shit, then it's only as needed. You won't need it at school."

"Thanks, Miss Loona! Can I eat now? And then we can work on Daddy's mug, right?"

"Yeah, yeah, Squirt. The bag on the left has your shit in it, I think." Loona shrugged as she stood up and grabbed her coffee cup from the table while the Puppy scampered over to grab the bags. Over a gulp of coffee, the Hellhound's red eyes looked down at the wide-eyed, and slightly envious, Imp that was staring at her. She arched her eyebrow and lowered her latte. "What?"

"'What'? You do all..." Blitzø gestured wildly at the puppy that was currently half buried in one of the greasy paper bags. "All that doting shit and all the fuck you have to say for yourself is 'what'?!"

"I was just giving her her fucking Opium so she could fucking breathe. Fuck's sake." Loona scoffed and then snarled at the puppy, who had torn the bag to get to her stuff. "Squirt, don't make a bigger mess! I have to clean that! Just bring the bag to me and I'll get your shit out!"

"I can do it!"

"Heema." Loona growled and her eyes flashed. The puppy pooched her lip out, but ultimately listened as she gathered the bag up in her hands and carried them down the table. Walking on it and leaving tracks of..was that..? No, it couldn't be. Wait, it was.

"Why is there glitter on her feet?" Blitzø asked, wide eyed. It was the puppy that answered, as she waited with a wagging tail for Loona to unpack the food.

"We're making a new mug for Daddy!" The adorable purple pup cheered, and Blitzø bit back the retort he wanted to make. The puppy's father wasn't the head of I.M.P.'s favorite person in Hell – the twisted fucker was chasing his daughter's tail! She was only twenty-two! Practically a baby! – but he really didn't want to get in another fight with Loona so soon after the last one about the Hellhound that kept sniffing around and wouldn't take a fucking hint! Oblivious of his thoughts on her father, the purple puppy's tail started to wag and she beamed up at Blitzø's best girl as a massive bright blue drink was handed to her. "Blurpleberry Maxed?! Thanks, Miss Loona!"

"Yeah, yeah, and here's the puppy platter. Go ham." Loona sighed as she handed the puppy a cardboard box that Blitzø was pretty sure didn't fit in the half-ripped, grease-soaked paper bag it came out of. The puppy was still with it enough to set her drink down before she took the box with two hands. Then, she popped the top and sat down right where she stood on the table to dig in, her tail wagging like crazy.

"...Is that even cooked?" Blitzø arched his brow. There wasn't a response, so he looked back at Loona. She was now eating portions of a bigger box that he was certain didn't fit in the other greasy paper bag. The Imp worked his jaw a few times before he shrugged. Hellhounds were just...different sometimes.

He walked around to look at the craft the puppy was supposedly working on. It was a coffee mug, with pretty decent doodles. The typical 'Favorite Alpha Male' shlock was printed on one side, and some knock-off plastic gemstones were glued around it. On the other side was a...very...impressive depiction of two Hellhound heads, in crayon. The perfect likenesses of the puppy and Loona were in the center of a big red heart. The imp's left eye twitched before he shunted off the implications to the back of his mind.

"Huh, this shit ain't half bad, kid." Blitzø hummed and reached out to grab the mug. It barely budged. He frowned and tried again. And again. And again. "What the fuck!? This shit...So heavy! Why?!"

"Orichalcum Clay!" The Puppy chirped, not looking away from her meal. "Daddy broke his last mug, so me and Miss Loona are makin' him a new one for his birthday! This mug will last fifty years before it totally roads!"

"Erodes. The clay still needs to finish hardening before we cook it one last time." Loona clarified as she closed her eyes and enjoyed her meal. She finished off with a satisfied sigh and took another gulp of her latte before she tossed the cup down after the box of food she just ate. "What are you messi–? Blitzø, what the fuck?! Don't just fuckin' grab it! It has to settle!"

"What? Oh, re-lax Loony-Toony, I can't even move it! See?" He made an example tug and it barely moved. "I dunno how you're going to get this thing to your dad, kid. At this point it's just a giant table orna–"

One last tug managed to break the unsettled clay handle off, taking a decent chunk of the mug with it. Blitzø looked down at the handle in his hand, then at the two Hellhounds. He smiled weakly and laughed nervously as his daughter's face shifted through several emotions before she bared teeth at him.

"W-Well, uh, guess you were right! Whoopsie-daisy," Blitzø said with a gulp. Loona growled and slowly stomped around the table towards him. He started to try putting the mug back together, with each frantic press straining the rest of the clay mug until more parts chipped and cracked off. "Don't worry, Loony! Daddy can fix it! Just a bit of gorilla glue and some tape and–Uh, Loony? You're getting really close, it's uh, hard to concentrate with you hovering over me like that."

"We spent...Six hours...making that mug." The Hellhound growled at him as she lifted her claws and her hindlegs tensed. "Blitzø, I'm going to fucking kill you."

"It's just a fucking mug! Loona, no! Bad Loona! Bad! Heel! Fuckin–Shit!" Blitzø yelped as his daughter chased him with bared fangs and a frothy snarl. In his flight from the room, he left the broken mug pieces on the table. What? He had priorities and most of them involved him not getting wasted by his adopted daughter.

"...Aw...It was almost done, too." Himawari pouted as she looked over at the broken pieces of mug. She licked off the grease from her paws before she got up to her feet and went over to the broken pieces of mug. She tilted her head and examined the shards that remained. The pictures she drew were mostly intact – both her and Miss Loona's faces were still together – but the mug itself was...Broken. It wouldn't fit together the same way as it did before.

Himawari sighed as she shifted the pieces around every which way while Miss Loona chased after Mister Blitzø throughout the office. She tilted her head as she put the handle in a different place. The orichalcum clay was hard enough to not squish in her grasp, but not soft enough for her to not be able to close some of the cracks.

"Hmm, if I put that there and put this piece with the 'Al' of alpha on it here..." Her ears perked up and her tail wagged as she got an idea. She went to her school bag and pulled her crafts supply box out to get the Queen Bee Honey-speckled Glitter Glue she had. "Just some squirts here and here...Miss Loona! Miss Loona, come look!"

When Miss Loona finally did come in – with some kind of sweet strawberry jam on her face that she didn't want to share – to look over what Himawari did to fix the mug, the older Hellhound's eyebrows shot up. She smiled and gave Himawari a gentle scratch on the head, and Himawari really leaned into it.

What? Miss Loona's scratches were as good as Daddy's!

"Not bad, Squirt."

"You think Daddy will like it?" Himawari asked, suddenly uncertain. Daddy always kept anything she gave him, things she made at school and pictures she'd drawn way back when she was a littler puppy were still kept in Daddy's room, in a book he kept on his desk – he'd shown it to her once.

"When you become a name everyone in Hell knows, Pickle, I'm telling everyone who asks that I already knew you would. These pictures are my proof." Daddy had told her, a big bright smile on his face. It was Himawari's favorite smile Daddy ever made, one he gave her at every chance he could until recently. Lately, even when Miss Loona was with them and after Himawari got medicine from Doctor Nairod, Daddy would have his 'grown up' smile. The smile she didn't like.

She missed Daddy's bright smile.

"Oh, Squirt." Loona sighed and knelt down to look her in the eye. She smiled her tiny smile, which looked like the little moon that hung off her collar, and stroked her hair. "Your Dad's gonna love it."

Himawari really hoped so. She really missed Daddy's bright smile.

She hoped he was being careful on his mission.

(Gluttony, Beelzebub Manor)

It had been just over three weeks since they had their first fight and a week since their make-up dinner. That night had involved a slightly overcooked rack of ribs, a happily sleeping puppy, and a great marathon of sex. A really great marathon of sex. A marathon that, if replication without the requirement of the fight and separation beforehand were possible, both participants would likely try to repeat it again, and again. And again.

To reiterate, it was really good sex.

As with everything in a Hellborn's life, the balance of bad to the recent good came when he had to uphold his arrangement with Queen Bee-Lzebub. His latest Demon Deal was won in his favor – as he'd expected the case would be, there wasn't a goddamn Hellhound in the History of Hell that had appreciated the Orphanages' existences; Bee was rather miffed – putting him ahead in their contested deals. The Queen was, expectedly, annoyed by the revelation, but sent a swath of riches to Greed in his company's name. His bankruptcy was avoided and he could focus on future endeavors and problems without concern about Greed's retaliation bringing his demise.

He'd walked in not twenty minutes ago and had been seated in the couch across from Bee, a fresh bottle of Beelzejuice manifested into his claws. He only took his first sip once she conceded her loss of their latest deal. It was on his second that she caught him off guard and caused him to choke on his drink.

"You want me to do what?" Naruto scowled at the Queen of Gluttony from where he sat across from her, wiping the spilt alcohol from his muzzle with his empty hand. Bee smirked at him, likely vindicated by his choking, and stretched herself across the arm chaise in a lascivious manner.

"You're gonna come with me to a boring as fuck Gala next week. Is that too hard for you to comprehend?"

"Our arrangement consists of weekly fucks." Naruto growled as he set his bottle down and glared at the Sin. "In no way, shape or form...will I ever fucking accompany you to a gala."

"You're fuckin' cute when you think you have a say in the matter." Bee cooed and flicked a finger. Air stopped flowing, his body briefly seized and his eyes rolled up as a sharp pain radiated from his chest, right beneath the collarbone that bore Bee's seal. Naruto slid out of the couch to his knees, his face turned to push into the ground. His teeth cracked as his jaw clenched before he forced the airflow to resume and pushed past the unbearable agony forced upon him.

As he prostrated himself on the floor and recovered from the ordeal, the Sin of Gluttony buzzed over to hover beside him and ran claws down his back.

"Yeah, I know. It's a total dick move, but you kind of forced my hand. Sorry, not sorry." Bee hummed as her claws traced patterns into his back. He glared at her from the corner of his eye as she grinned. "Don't forget, Na-Ru-To, you belong to me."

"I...belong...to nobody." Naruto snarled. His claws dug into her floor and he pushed himself up to look the Sin in the eye. "You have my power at your command. You get a dick every week. You may have a claim to my soul...but you don't fuckin' own me."

"You wanna stress test that theory?" Bee asked, a sharp buzz behind the trill of her purr. Her eyes gleamed. "Let's cut to the chase then, you want to make another Demon Deal?"

Naruto almost demanded the stakes then and there, before he remembered a meeting he had not three days prior. The King had granted him an audience. He pleaded his case and was given permission to hunt the Humans responsible for harming his girlfriend and puppy. Under a condition, a condition that Naruto had to fulfill within two more weeks, a condition that significantly reduced his own way to protect himself.

"...I'll go with you, but you will release me from your horde." Naruto countered. When Bee arched an unimpressed eyebrow, he narrowed his eyes. "Not enough?"

"Not even fuckin' slightly!" she scoffed and leaned back to cross her arms. "Sorry, Foxy, but you'll have to give me more than that to really get me to consider releasing you from my Horde."

"...What if I fuck you stupid tonight?" She snorted and he scowled. "Really. I mean it. No more Deals. No more stipulations. No tricks. If I fuck you stupid, or just unconscious, you concede the Deals to me. You release me from your Horde. I'll still accompany you to this stupid Gala and we can continue our weekly 'private parties', unless you don't want them."

Before he could blink, Bee had him on his back and her claws dug into his shoulders. Her hips straddled his and his jeans were soaked by her anticipation. He had to fight himself to not try and roll them. This wasn't a fight, he wasn't losing, he had the proverbial high ground right now. He just had to keep control of himself, of the two reactions he had to her atop him. His fight instincts wanted to kick her off, and then his fuck instincts told him to get her off when she scented the base of his ears and her hips began to roll.

"Say I take this agreement, Na-Ru-To," Bee breathed into his ear, which sent electricity down his spine and enticed a side of him that had been starved of attention since his fight with Loona. "What do I get if I outlast you?"

Here comes the big gamble, he had to sell this right.

"Whatever you want." Naruto tilted his head and narrowed his eyes. "I'll...submit."

"Mm, tempting...What if I want your cute little pup?" Bee asked, tilting her head. Her eyes gleamed and her teeth widened. "She's fuckin' adorbs, y'know? Like, no lie, that little girl's a sweetling in every sense of the word. Just the right kind of puppy to liven up my manor when there isn't any partying going on, y'know?"

"You want me to wager my puppy?" Naruto felt his nostrils flare. He felt the air cool around him and kept his gaze locked with the Sin of Gluttony's. "You want me...to wager my daughter?"

"Mm-hm, pretty much, yeah."

"Bee, let me up."

"No deal?"

"Let. Me. Up." Naruto growled.

The Sin stared him down for one more moment before she grinned and floated up. He got to his feet and offered his hand to the Sin, all the while fighting back his ingrained reaction to put down the one that dared. He hated what he was about to do. He hated it, hated it, hated it. But it had to be done.

"Give me your hand."

"Thumb war?"

"Give. Me. Your. Hand." Naruto repeated through gritted teeth. Bee licked her lips and then clasped her upper left hand around his. "Queen Bee-Lzebub, I swear on my name, on my family...if I falter or fail to impress tonight, I will serve you loyally and adhere to your request without protest. If I fail or falter...You will...You can...take my puppy."

"...Oh, shit, this just got serious, didn't it? That's some old magic." Bee muttered, her grin still present. Likely excited by the uniqueness of this sort of challenge. It was an old magic, one rarely used since the popularity of Demon Deals rose. Echo Two had told him about it after he revealed to his trusted Mercenaries of the new time limit he had.

"Na-Ru-To Uzu-Ma-Ki," Bee said, utterly butchering his name's pronunciation. "I swear on my name, on my family, that if you impress or succeed tonight, you will be released from my Horde and the Demon Deals will be turned in your favor. I will bring your sexy ass along with me as my side piece to the Gala on Friday and I won't ever threaten or try to take your puppy from you. I will...respect your independence."

A gong sounded somewhere, faint and distant, but Naruto paid it no mind.

"The deal is set." He grumbled and tightened his grip on her hand. His eyeshine flared and he pulled the Sin close. "So...let's get started."

"Wait, shit, really?" Bee's eyes widened and her ears perked up along with her grin. "Right now?"

"Yes." Naruto growled, before he pushed his lips onto hers.

(Gluttony, Hellhound Heights)

Blitzø was so fucking lucky that the Squirt had turned his fuckup around in their favor, now Loona didn't actually have to murder him.

With their gift wrapped and a mess left for the three Imps to clean up – worse than the one Loona had to take care of – the two She-Hounds went to Gluttony to show celebrate their favorite Hound's birthday. Rather than force a smile and grin through the frankensteined mug, Naruto had been elated with the gift and had smiled so brightly that it'd eclipsed Hell's sun. He'd hugged both of them, and while the Squirt got a longer one with more mumbled gratification and praise for her artistic talents, Loona got an enthusiastic promise for similar things after dinner.

A promise that was fucking kept.

A repeat of their last marathon before his weekly hookup with Queen Bee? Yes, please.

What she hadn't expected was for a merciless and thorough fucking that left her limp. Again. Not just once, but five times, in the span of two hours, her boyfriend made certain that she was completely and utterly satisfied. And then he kept going until they'd tied.

"Merciful fuck." Loona breathed as she laid atop her boyfriend's chest. She panted and huffed as he nuzzled her face and stroked her back. She groaned at his ministrations while his knot slowly softened and his seed filled her. Her eyes fluttered open before they could focus on his. "Babe, where the shit did that come from?"

"...We need to talk." He muttered softly as he looked down at her. The worst words to hear in a relationship, it set her on edge and pulled her right out of her post-orgasm high. With what felt like an icy vice on her black heart, Loona stilled and held his gaze, which he took – appropriately – to mean he should continue. "Yesterday, I had to go to Bee's, you know that."

With a small growl, Loona bit her tongue and slowly nodded. She didn't like thinking about the Sin of Gluttony getting to have at what was hers. The saving grace was that it was mostly anal, which frankly, Loona didn't think she'd ever manage that comfortably. Maybe with an hour long session of finger-play, lube and a lot of alcohol involved, but otherwise, it wasn't happening. She was glad that Naruto didn't ever push for it. ...That was a good thing right? Standards in Hell were all sorts of fucking skewed.

"Well, you also know that I had to go talk to Lucifer on Friday."

"Yeah." That was a weird story to get from her boyfriend. Sure, like, Lucifer was rumored to be tiny and all powerful, but...to be that powerful? She kind of had her doubts.

"You remember the stipulation he gave me?"

"About the Demon Deals, right? ...Oh. Oh! Oh, shit." Loona blinked. She looked down at his chest. The mark that had hurt her was still there, but seemed fainter, almost less of a brand and more of a natural pattern in his coat. "Babe...Naruto, what happened?"

"...Well, uh...You know how I mostly tried to deter Bee by being a literal pain in her ass?" He asked, his ears flattened.

"Yes..?"

"I...changed tactics."

"The fuck does that mean?"

"...I um...I sort of...ahem, I f-fucked her stupid." He looked away, as if ashamed. "And...It wasn't entirely with anal."

"Wasn't entirely–?" Loona almost tilted her head when it clicked. She glared at him. "You fucked her pussy."

"I...It got too messy after the third hour, so I had to alternate–"

"On second thought, I don't want to know the details." Loona closed her eyes and growled. "You just–Did you have to–?!"

"She threatened to go after Himawari, Loo." Naruto whined. Loona froze as an unnatural, hot fury welled within her. First the bitch tried to take her Hellhound, then she tried to take her–his puppy? The same puppy that had been through so much shit in the last few months? The same puppy who couldn't bark or whine for too long before the strain on her vocal chords rendered her mute or left her coughing up her lungs? A line had been crossed. The grey She-Hound snaked her arms around his sides as he tightened his arms around her. The two Hellhounds scented each others' necks and the larger trembled.

"Loo, I-I had to give it everything." He huffed, voice thick with the same sincere remorse that he'd had after he'd ignored her for two weeks. "I-I couldn't risk...baby, I'm so fuckin' sor–"

"If you fucking apologize right now...I might really fucking hurt you." Loona growled. She pulled back to sit up and cupped her Hellhound's face. "Lead. With. That. Not with the details. Yeah, I'm not fuckin happy that Bee got some of your choice fucking, but I would be way fucking less happy if you had to give that ungrateful fucking bitch your puppy! Fuck, Naruto, she's already fucking suffered enough!"

"...You don't have to tell me twice." He muttered, a small smile on his face.

Before she could ask on it, his lips gently pressed against hers and held her captive. The fire racing through her veins cooled as if suddenly doused with a cold bucket of ice water, and her arms moved to wind around his neck. He held her against him as their lips molded again and again. It was about five minutes later that they parted for more than a millisecond of breaths.

"...So, who'd you fuck that you felt like you needed to kiss me like that?" Loona huffed and leaned into the hand that cupped her jaw.

"The most beautiful fuckin Hellhound in all the seven rings." Naruto rumbled as he brought his head up to nuzzle hers. He smiled as their eyes locked and he stroked her cheek with his thumb. "Loona. The thing with Bee...you know it's just because she's a Sin, right?"

"...I know." Loona closed her eyes. "It's bullshit. She threatened to take your puppy, to leave you crippled...Shit, I don't want to fucking talk about her anymore."

"Okay."

"...Just like that?" Loona opened her eyes to meet his gaze. He took hold of one of her hands in his free hand and pressed his lips against her palm before he pulled her up – oh, hey, he deflated. That's a nice, if weird, feeling – so they could look each other in the eye.

"Just like that." He nodded. "I told you before, we need to have trust and be open with each other. To communicate. It's going to be hard and we're both going to fuck it up, but right now, tonight? I think we did really well."

"Yeah?" Loona smiled. She cupped his face and put her lips to his. Another kiss held for over a minute before it broke and they looked each other in the eye. "I'm not happy it happened, but I'm glad it's over. You won the Deals and you're free. Right?"

"..Not..exactly."

"I'm not going to like this, am I?"

"No."

"You know what? Save it for tomorrow." Loona sighed. She gave him a rueful smile and another kiss. "It's your birthday and I'll let the 'fucked a Sin stupid' thing slide. She threatened Heema, bitch is lucky that's what she got instead of some angelic lead to eat."

"If you're sure," Naruto said as something poked into her thigh. His eyeshine flashed and his small smile spread into a salacious grin. "Maybe I should make it up to you?"

"Mm, threaten me with a good time." Loona grinned back as she started to roll her hips. She groaned when he rolled them so that he hovered over her and his cock pressed into her stomach. "Fuck, Babe. Your dick is huge."

"...Loo, your playful dirty talk needs work." He chuckled and cut her annoyed retort off by assaulting her neck with affectionate suckles and kisses. Yeah, Bee might've gotten a nice little victory, a decent little fuck, but Loona? She was winning the fucking war.

AN: And Bee is still the minor antagonist I love making her out to be! Why? I dunno, really. Probably because it's just funnier (to Me) that way, when we all know Bee (canon) is so much nicer than that.

Then again…she went after the puppy and we all know by now, to paraphrase a fictional serial killer: "Don't Fuck With The Pup"

Thanks for reading!