AN: Given my new work position/title (glorified variant of my last with worse (later) hours) I figure I should ask: if I move to weekly updates, what day should I update on?

Disclaimer: Bonesboy15 doesn't own Helluva Boss or Naruto. The following is a written work of fan-fiction. It contains adult language and situations. Reader discretion is advised.

Who's That Father?

Also Sprach Zarathrustra

(Then: Beelzehaven, Hellhound Orphanage)

A collapse in the structure amidst one of the heavy rainstorms had awoken the caretakers and Matron, and they hustled to get the puppies out before the building gave way. Unknown to them, the collapse wasn't due to the storm, nor was there fault in the construction. It was due to desperation that the damage existed. A Hound's frantic flight from a supposed safe haven, far from the Rings of Hell, covered by the roars of Gluttony's storms.

A figure clad in thick furs and crude clothes rushed through the halls until it found the room for newborns. Still occupied by a good half dozen runts – as the orphanage's priority dictated to get the older puppies to safety to keep them from giving in to panic – the stranger hurried to kneel beside an empty crib. The figure hesitated before it looked down at its carried cargo in its arm. An orange furred puppy, its eyes still closed and three thin lines marring either cheek, was curled into the arm. A golden and white furred hand stroked over the pup's head, claws careful not to leave a mark.

Words, so many to say, all of them come to mind, but there is no way for him to properly articulate it. Logic tells him the puppy won't remember it, that it doesn't matter and that he is wasting time. His cold heart tells him that the chances of being heard don't matter, that logic doesn't matter, he risked this much for his child, the least he could do is say something to the puppy. Something that the note he will leave will not convey.

"...Naruto." He managed finally, his throat tight. He rested his hand on the pup's head and brought his muzzle down to take one last scent. He took a shuddered breath and muttered something in another language before he put his lips to his pup's crown. He pulled them back and nuzzled the puppy one last time. Finally, the words he could muster came to mind.

"You...are going to do amazing things, Naruto." He whispered. Blue eyes cracked open to look down at the puppy. The Hound scratched at the pup's chin, in the spot where his mother was sensitive – it passed down, he was happy to note – The Hound smiled bitterly and stroked the puppy's face. "You have to be strong, son. Be strong enough to be gentle. Be gentle, but don't be a bi...You don't have to be nice, but never fail to be kind. I'm sorry we couldn't...that we didn't have more time."

The doorknob clicked and the fur-wearing Hound ear twitched toward it. Soft mutters from caretakers, grumbling about going out into the weather again. The Hound reluctantly moved away from the crib. He slipped into the shadows and from there, through the space between realms, a trick taught to him by his mother. A few stop offs in other Rings, leaving clues, notes, various signs for what other allies they'd have.

His last stop was back in Gluttony, in the heart of the Mountains. A red eye locked onto him as soon as he was there. He stepped forward and dropped to his knees.

"Lord Kurama, Shadow of Gluttony's Violence. I seek your aid."

"...Do I know you, Hellhound?"

"Not in this life, Lord Kurama, but in a past. Although, you and my wife are more...familiar." The Hound chuckled mirthlessly. He pulled his furred hood down to reveal his thick golden fur blue eyes stared up into wide-eyed red. "It's been a long time, father-in-law."

"..Oh...Of course, you would remember. Why are you here," The Shadow of the Sin of Gluttony leaned forward on his throne. Red eyes within the voids narrowed and gleaming fangs were bared with a curl of his lips. "Yondaime?"

(Now: Pride, Buckzo Apartment)

When Naruto woke her up at three in the morning as he came back into their room, an hour after she'd finally passed out from their second multi-hour fuckfest, she wasn't happy. That was putting it very lightly, in hindsight. The more she thought about it, the more her threat of castration seemed a bit much for an accidental wake up, especially since he spent the forty minutes they were separated looking for the I.M.P. Van. Apparently, Blitzø had actually parked it nearby, by a dumpster.

In a wall.

Sideways.

No wonder he forgot where it was.

As much as she would've loved to spend a night in a shitty Earth motel with her boyfriend, Loona was actually glad they decided to not spend the whole night there; the things they could smell and hear going on in adjacent rooms was fucking irritating. Not to mention the 'free bar' for costumes was a fucking joke, everything was watered down to the bare fucking minimum. And that was before she even looked at the cost for the canned crap that wasn't covered by the generous 'free for costumed' claim. Worst fucking motel ever? Possibly.

She'd heard that the Princess of Hell was opening one for Sinners. Maybe they could check it out sometime? Mm, it can wait.

Again, though, her boyfriend had found and reclaimed Blitzø's van, and drove them back to Pride while she went back to sleep. The next time she woke up, it was to a barked curse from Naruto after he whacked his head on the doorway going into her apartment. That he could park a van he barely fit in, slip her into his arms and carry her up three flights of stairs – because there was no fucking way the death trap that was the building's elevator was miraculously working after all the time it's been out – without waking her was a lovely discovery. Upon seeing her awake, the big Mercenary Boss gave her a grin that was more of a grimace.

"If this relationship is going to continue, we've got to get you into a bigger apartment." He muttered, hunched over to a near ninety degree angle as he carried her toward her room. She let that thought bounce around her sleepy head for a minute, and then wondered if that was code for her to move in with him. They'd been together, what, two months? Was that long enough? Well, maybe only technically they'd been together that long, given the 'fortnight fight' they had midway through. Her boyfriend stopped just as they got to the edge of the couch and he closed his eyes. "If and when we do, he's got to get his own room. Preferably one that's soundproofed."

As more coherency filtered in, she could hear what his complaint was for and tilted her head back to get eyes on the situation so she could determine how embarrassed she should be. Wearing boxers and an oversized paw-print shirt that she suspected was stolen from her room, Blitzø lay half on his stomach, contorted like he was a creature of liquid form with one arm hanging off of the couch, just shy of touching the floor. He was snoring like a chainsaw with a half empty, uncorked bottle of years old Mammon-Aid was in the hanging hand and spilling onto the floor around the couch.

"Huh, it's actually fuggin waterproof, too." She muttered, observing the liquor pool into a puddle rather than deep into the floor. She'd thought that refurbishing they'd gone through three years back was a load of shit. Shows what she knew. Ultimately though, it was not important. She turned back to snuggle into her boyfriend's comfy and firm chest. "His problem later. Bed, now."

"So, it's not just when you're horny? You're always this pushy. Should've guessed you'd hide that from me until I'm about three months in." Naruto playfully huffed. Were she not groggy from lack of sleep, she'd thump him. As it was, the best she could do was give a half-hearted snarl with some barely exposed fangs. He growled back as he cracked her door open before he carried her over to her bed. Warmth was lost for only a second before she landed on a very familiar mattress, with blankets over her not long after. She gave a tired blink when she realized her boyfriend wasn't sticking around.

"Where are...you going?" Loona asked around a yawn. Naruto looked back at her with a small half-grin, and gestured to the new cargo in his arm. Curled into a tight little ball of lavender and indigo fluff, the Squirt slept with closed eyes and a parted mouth.

"She's six years old now. Maybe a few hours more." He mumbled as he turned his gaze down to his puppy. His toothy grin melted into a warm smile as his eyes lit up – figuratively, not the literal eyeshine – with adoration and his tail started to sway in a near-wag. Oh...shit, that face he was making really worked for Loona. Like, all cylinders were busting their collective asses off to heat up her body. Naruto, ignorant of or ignoring her newfound arousal, lowered his muzzle to first kiss and then nuzzle the Squirt's head. His voice grew thick and hoarse. "My baby girl...She's growing up so fuckin fast."

More alert once the synapses finished firing, she sat up and fumbled with her pockets for her phone. She adjusted the flash, aligned the camera and... perfect. Yep, that's his new contact pic. Shit, this was one of the hottest fucking things Loona had ever seen; a Hellhound that was clothed with a fuckin' puppy in his arms and smiling at it. She wanted to jump him so fuckin' badly, that it was kind of concerning.

"Don't go." She muttered when he turned to leave. Naruto looked back at her, an eyebrow arched.

"What?"

"Stay here tonight. Both of you." Loona slipped out of her bed he just tucked her into and went over to grab his wrist. He allowed himself to be pulled back and guided to lie on her too small for any real fun bed. Further, he allowed her to take the Squirt from his arm and curl up with the pup beside him. His arms wrapped around them both and his head rested atop hers as he let out a content huff. The she-hound nipped at her boyfriend's neck. "She can get a birthday lunch with Daddy alone later."

"She's got school." Naruto mumbled. "I have work. You have work."

"Nope, not today." She huffed. Loona was tired, but warm and happy with her tail going nearly full wag; with a puppy that was (not) hers in her arms and the puppy's father holding her in his. She'd spend the rest of her life like this if she could. "Now, shut the fuck up and go to sleep."

"So pushy." He huffed and pulled her close. A quick press of lips ticked her notched ear before he physically relaxed. "Love you, Loona."

"Love you, Naruto." Loona muttered as sleep called to her. She nuzzled into the sleeping pup's head, then whispered as quietly as she could: "Love you, too, Squirt."

A soft sleepy whine answered back and she felt the puppy snuggle closer into the crook of her neck. More than satisfied with her lot in life, Loona almost drifted off to peaceful slumber. Almost, because her eyes snapped open as that stupid little voice in the back of her head reminded her of something.

"Babe?"

"Hm? What?" Naruto sounded like he was half asleep already. Just how often did he ever try going back to bed? Probably about as often as he tried taking those novel things called 'days off', i.e., never.

"Did you grab my collar?"

"C'lar?"

"Did you grab it?"

"Mm. No." He sighed into her head. "Pretty sure it's FUBAR, Loo."

"FUBAR?"

"Fucked Up Beyond Any Repair. Broke it, 'member?"

Oh, yeah, that was a great orgasm. Everything went white – her vision, her mouth, her sinuses, her throat, his crotch; everything – for a solid three minutes, it was awesome. Shame it cost her her favorite collar. Shit, she really liked that collar. It was perfect, for the most part, and went with ninety percent of her outfits...granted, there wasn't really a lot of variation in her usual wardrobe, but still. She really liked that collar, it had been with her since...shit, since she was fourteen and discovered a few things about herself.

"I'll get you another one," he grumbled when a disappointed whine slipped out of her mouth. His nose pressed on her head and his lips followed in a quick kiss. "And more shorts...Fuck it, we'll hit a store up later."

"Fine. You're buying."

"'S why I fuggin offered." He yawned and then tugged both her and the Squirt closer to him. His muzzle rubbed down against the puppy and then against hers. Their scents mingled and merged into a soothing whiff of air that soothed any frazzled nerves. "No more talkin', go to sleep, Loo."

Concern abated, Loona obliged with his request.

(Now: Sloth, St. Ann's Memorial)

Several Rings away, huddled in a small nondescript red Jail-Opy parked at the top of the hospital's four story garage were two Hellhounds. One held a set of binoculars up to his eyes from where he sat behind the wheel, while the other was curled into a near ball from how low she sat on the passenger seat, holding a modified microphone in her hands. The former growled as he watched a mange-riddled, scale-line tattooed Hellhound walk out of a hospital with two green-clad Hellhounds flanking him. His partner reached out with her other hand and whacked his arm.

"Shut it, E.T., they're talking about plans for tomorrow."

"Oh, great, I get to spend more of my fucking time watching this jackoff walk around with his smug face still attached to his body." Echo Two huffed and glowered at the three walking mutts. His visible eyes crinkled as his half-cut ear folded back with the other. "I'm getting so fucking sick of this surveillance shit, Riza. You have no fuckin idea. I get that we need all the intel, but don't we have fuckin' lancers we can hand this shit off to?"

"Not any that Priscilla, Toad or Boss signed off on. You know that."

"Fuck. How many fuckin hours of my life am I gonna spend watching this dickhole walk around and breathe as if he ain't a massive traitor to our kind?"

"Well, he is slithering 'home' for the night and once his car leaves, it's up to Iota. Annnd, there he goes." Riza watched the High Priority Target drive off.

"Fuckin finally." Echo Two sighed in relief. He put his claws to his collar. "Echo Leader this Echo Two with routine check, over."

"Echo Two, go ahead with routine check, over."

"Echo Leader, Whiskey Delta plus Two has entered Whiskey Delta's vehicle and is leaving the premises. Read back, over."

"I read back, Whiskey Delta plus Two has entered Whiskey Delta's vehicle and is leaving the premises, over."

"Correct, over."

"Wilco, ov–Wait. Echo Two, standby." Kayne ordered as the inter-ring radio signal went quiet for a moment before she popped back on again. "Echo Two, you and Echo Four are clear to disengage and retire. Iota will take point on dog-sitting. Read back, over."

"Fuck yes!" Echo Two grinned beneath his mask before he tapped down on the PTT again. "I read back, Echo Leader. Echo Two and Echo Four will disengage and retire while Team Iota takes point on dog-sitting, over."

"Correct. Standby, Echo Two, over."

"Standing by, over."

"Echo Two, be back at base by oh-six-hundred for debriefing, over."

"Wilco, over."

"Roger, out."

"Thank fuck." Echo Two sighed as he sat back and reclined in the driver's seat for a minute. "Ugh, this three day rotation shit sucks. You wanna go grab some beers or something?"

"So long as we talk about other shit other than just bitching about how much we hate this assignment and want to kill our target." Riza mused as she lowered the monitor headphones down to rest around her neck and switched off the boosted microphone. Echo Two started the car as she pushed herself back to a fully upright seating position.

"Like what?"

"Like how I'm late."

"Late for wh–?" Echo Two paused mid mirror check and shifted the car back from reverse into park. He slowly turned to look at the smaller she hound beside him. He scrutinized her for a minute and took an audible sniff. Even with his mask, it was easy to see his jaw had dropped a bit. "...You're not fucking with me about this, are you?"

"Nope." Riza held his gaze with her own red eyes. "I'm two weeks late."

"Oh. Fuck."

"Yeah, no shit."

"...You wanna keep it?"

"Do you?"

"I mean, yeah." Echo Two turned to face her. "But I'm not the one growing a fucking puppy in my uterus, Riza."

"That'd be something impressive if you did." Riza joked lamely.

"Stop dodging the fucking question."

"Yes, fuck. I do. And-and I don't want to give it up to an orphanage," she said. He nodded. Given who they worked for and his opinion on the Beelzebub Orphanages – as well as the rising concern with their current target and his 'investors' interests in Hellpups – it wasn't a surprise. Most Hellhound mercenaries, even those outside W.T.F., shared the same experiences in or thoughts about those orphanages. Embolden by her partner and teammate's support, Riza continued. "But I mean...the shit that I do ain't exactly a guarantee–"

"We're both part of the Boss' Pack, 'Hawkeye'." Echo Two argued. He couldn't hide the way his tail thumped against the chair. "Even if something happens to us, he'd take care of whoever remained or, worst case scenario, the Puppy. Shit, given all the members of Pickle's Aunts and Uncles' Brigade, we might be able to start a communal 'sitting'. Could even see a fight for Sin-Father start up if it gets out too soon–"

"You are getting really excited about this, E.T.," Riza said, eyes narrowed and a smirk on her face. The Hound froze and his tail stilled. "Is there something you want to tell me?"

"...Not without a lot more alcohol on hand."

"Fine. I want something to eat that's not bar food."

"Cravings already? Isn't that too early?"

"No, we've been cramped in this fucking car for ten hours eating shit from Sloth's crap coffee stores."

"Alright. Wanna go to The Bowl?"

"Sounds like a date."

"...Would it be bad if it was?"

"I might be carrying your pup already, dumbass."

"Right. Right. Okay."

"Sweet fuck, you really are a totally different dog when it comes to relationships."

"Shut up, Riza."

"Make me...Leroy."

"Bitch, don't say my name in the field!" He snarled as she burst into laughter. He growled half heartedly as he backed out and pulled away from Sloth's hospital. His tail started to wag again as he listened to her laugh.

(Now: Pride, Buckzo Apartment)

The smell of cured and cooked meat was what stirred him from sleep. Anything related to fire always tended to get him to sober up and his adrenaline to skyrocket. The only thing that countered such was the fact that he had spent the night babysitting the rambunctious and sugar-high five-year-old grand-puppy of the only fucking Hellborn that scared him more than Death itself. And yes, there was a phone call that reignited that fear, randomly in the midst of bathing the cute little mongrel, how did you know? It took until the sugar crash to kick in at two in the morning and a heavy drinking, bitch posting session until three before he passed out.

On the couch.

Again.

"Augh, fuck. My back." Blitzø groaned as he rolled off the couch– splatt! Oh dammit. There was wine on the floor.

"Miss Loona! Mister Blitzø finally fell!"

"Can you get a picture for me, Squirt? I'm a little busy–Naruto, get your ass the fuck out of my way!"

"Because I have so much space to move it to! If I knew we were gonna fucking cook, I should've just driven us to our place–!"

"Squirt wanted to eat here, take it up with here.

Click!

"Gah! Blind! Loony, help! The sun is attacking me again!" Blitzø whined as a hammer cracked against his skull after a bright flash of light suddenly took his clearing bleary eyesight.

"Oops! Sorry, Mister Blitzø!" That sounded like a certain puppy he'd bathed and babysat last night. Come to think of it, those growling voices sounded familiar, too. Almost like-

"Loony! You made it home–..How in the fuck do you fit in this apartment?" Blitzø asked as he squinted at the asshole Hellhound that kept sniffing around his daughter.

"Carefully. Very fucking carefully." The lean beefcake behemoth muttered as he practically waddled in the midst of a crouch to get around the kitchen. He snagged the back of the giggling puppy's shirt in two claws and hoisted her up to his arms. He nosed and nuzzled the giggling puppy, who returned the favor. "You think it's funny, huh Pickle?"

"Yes!" Himawari giggled out. Ugh, Blitzø couldn't believe that little adorable thing came from this giant jackass. He practically melted when she grabbed her father's muzzle and tugged a bit at his smirking face. "You look really silly, Daddy!"

"Oh do I? I will remember that you said those words come tomorrow, baby girl." He promised with a small growl as he did something to her neck to make the puppy squeal and burst into laughter. As she settled down, the giant asshat kissed her cheek and set her down. "Well as funny as it seems to you, Daddy can't squat around all day, so go eat your breakfast while us grown ups have a quick chat."

"Chat?" The puppy and Blitzø asked at the same time, the former's tail wagging as she went over to climb onto the island chairs while the latter frowned as he continued to rub his half-clear eyes. Blue eyes locked with Blitzø's yellow and the Imp felt like he was being stared down by a Noble.

"Yes." He growled as he snagged the Imp's shirt and hoisted him up. Yeesh, even squatting this mutt was huge. Holding him four feet off the ground – Blitzø was so fucking happy he didn't have Barbie's aversion to heights. "We need to have a chat. Father to father. Back in a few minutes."

"Try not to kill each other." Loony – her hair a mess in a way that Blitzø rarely saw so early without threat upon his person – drawled as she set a plate down across from Himawari and started eating. Hm, it smelled good. Wait, since when can Loona cook?

"I'll do my best." The asshole returned as he carried Blitz out into the hallway where he could stand to his mostly full height. He set Blitz down and pulled out a small baggy from his pocket. Some sort of bag full of powder that he dug his claw around in and snorted into his snout. Was that–?

"The fuck do you take coke for?" Blitzø asked before he could demand why they left the apartment. Before he could fathom adjusting his question to get back to that line of thought and demand the asshole leave his Loony alone, the taller hound offered him the bag. Well, if he was offering a free snort of booger sugar...Blitz wouldn't be rude. He took a handful and shoved that shit onto his face.

Hooooooooo–fuck! That was NOT cocaine! Blitzø didn't know what this shit was, but he had never felt so fucking amped before!

"The fuck is this shit?!"

"Puppy Milk Formula." Naruto sniffed and blinked a few times. He sighed and pocketed the bag again. His other hand rubbed at his eye for a moment before it switched to the other eye. "Shit's the best drug I've ever taken, and it fucking beats coffee in waking me up. If we're going going to talk – and we are going to talk, Blitzø – then I'm going to be as fucking awake as I can be."

"Fuck do we need to talk about–?! Fuck! Shit! I need to do something–!" Blitzø caught a cube of smaller colored cubes tossed his way. "The fuck is this?"

"Make all the colors match. One color per side."

"Where the fuck did you–?"

"If you don't have something to occupy part of your mind with, you'll go into cardiac arrest." The Hound deadpanned. He crossed his arms. "That or start masturbating."

"Yeah, I think I'll do–" Blitzø jerked back as a mouth full of massive sharp teeth was suddenly bared millimeters from his face.

"You start jerking within fifteen feet of my puppy and you'll never fucking jerk yourself or anyone else off ever again." The Hellhound growled. Any urge Blitzø may have had to masturbate was suddenly killed. That's wild. The Hellhound tapped the cube in Blitzø's hand. "Six sides. Six colors. Make it happen. I'll start, you listen, if you need me to repeat myself, tell me. Got it?"

"...Oh, you're being 'nice' because I'm fucking wired right now." Blitzø realized. The hound smirked and pulled back.

"Got it in one." He leaned on the door. "So, I know you prefer living close to your workplace, I get that..but what would it take for you to move to another ring?"

"Move? Fuck would I do that for?" Blitzø muttered as he started spinning the cube. Huh, if one side went this way then another side would–This is actually pretty fucking cool.

"Because I don't want Loona in the same fucking ring that gets visited by fucking Angels on a yearly fucking basis." The jackass Hellhound deadpanned. Blitzø froze, mind going to overdrive.

"Th-they can't come after us. We–Hellborn aren't allowed to be–"

"If you have a client that hasn't paid you, that was being threatened by one of those Feathered Fucks, would you try and fight back? Just for your pay?"

Blitzø flicked a few cubes around – hey, cool, he got the green side. One down, five to go! – and furrowed his brow. Would he? Probably. He didn't like doing shit for free. He did like having shit done for him for free. Getting paid to kill others was good, too.

"I'll take your silence as a yes." The Hellhound murmured. "Now, suppose that does happen and Loona gets involved. You aren't dealing with human weaponry you can walk off. You'd be facing angelic, Holy weapons. Blessed blades, crucifixes with Yeusha's depiction, the works."

"..We could be out of the ring–"

"But you don't know that for sure, shit she doesn't even have to be in the Ring with you for her to get hurt." The Imp blinked and tried to follow that logic, which prompted the other Hellborn to sigh. The Hellhound crouched down to his height and stared him in the eye. "Blitzø, when you adopted Loona, you became her father. The decisions you make are not just about you anymore. You became her protector, her caretaker, her first and last line of defense."

"Loony doesn't need me to protect her." He mumbled, remembering that awful argument they had a few months back. "She's twenty-two years old. I dunno why you're talking to me about fucking moving when she's the one you want to move."

"Because, dumbass, you're her father," the Hound said with a small snarl and a flick in the head. Blitzø looked up from his puzzle – three sides, motherfuckers! Blue yellow and green! Choke on it! – and met the Hellhound's blue eyes again. "If anything happened to you, how do you think she'd handle it?"

"Probably light up a smoke, burn my shit and move on with her life after a few beers."

"Maybe. Or...maybe she would hide it, maybe she'd bury it for a few years, and maybe she'd snap on the spot when she found out. Point is, it will devastate her when you die." The Hound sighed. "I can't...I can't protect her from that, but I can delay it. If I was willing to move you out of this shithole into a nicer place in another ring, would you go for it?"

"...I'd still pay rent?"

"After the first month, yes."

Fucking cheapskate.

"I'm not being cheap–" ah, shit he said that out loud. "–I have my own bills and shit to pay for, dumbass, not to mention my puppy's needs. Since she tolerates your presence, I will help you. That you're also Loona's father is another factor in your favor."

"And you won't bar her from living with me if she wants?" Blitzø asked, brows furrowed. Stupid fourth side, why did red and orange look so fucking similar?! At least white was half-done. Fucking white, stupid color.

"If she doesn't want to move in, I won't force her to." The asshole nodded.

Ugh, stupid reasonable douchebag. He was making it really hard for Blitzø to say no. This was a good fucking deal, and he had found a bomb ass way to get totally wired without dumping ass amounts of money in Sloth. On top of that, the deal was mostly for Loona's benefit, and Blitzø loved it when Loona was happy, she was just so cute! What with the tail wagging and the big hellpuppy eyes and the little smile she had – Ha, ha! Fuck you orange side! You have been conquered! ..how did the white and red get mixed like that?!

"Fine, whatever, but Loona gets to pick the place and if it's too far for a drive to work, you're covering our transit fees!"

"Sure. Let's go eat."

"Yeah whatever." Ha, Sucker. He was so going to talk Loona into picking somewhere in Greed…fuck, how did he lose green?! Blitzø growled as he walked back into his apartment.

(Now: Gluttony, Beelzehaven, Business Boulevard)

Blitzø finally crashed just after he finished his Hubris Cube. It was an ingenious little charmed puzzle that would keep shifting around whenever the operator got a big head and wouldn't stop changing unless the demon using it stopped thinking about solving it in favor of another demon's feelings. That it was solved while Blitzø talked to Loona about moving out of their shit apartment told Naruto he made the right choice in his method of manipulation.

What? He was a Hellhound! A low ranking demon, sure, but he was still a bonafide demon. Manipulation, especially of the species seen with higher statuses than his own, was his bread and butter. Granted, he preferred to use force where he could, but using his wit was also satisfying in its own way.

Anyway, once the Imp crashed from his high, the dishes were cleared, and they'd gotten ready to face the day, Naruto drove his girls back to Gluttony to let them go nuts in Beelzehaven's market plaza. Their first stop? Toys For Pups, a rather obviously named store that sold toys for Hellpuppies. Granted, there were some fun things that could be called 'toys' in the back rooms for 'Party Pups'. It was Hell, what else could be expected?

"Okay, Pickle. You know the rules." Naruto sighed as he knelt down to tap his excited six year old puppy on the nose with a claw. Her eyes were on him even as her tail whipped back and forth, and her ears kept twisting back to the occasional whine or howl. He held her gaze. "Don't start a fight for something, if there's only one thing left–?"

"Let someone else get it, 'cause some puppies only get this one trip to the store, if at all. If I really want it, Daddy will get it shipped to the house," she said with a nod. He grinned at her, that was his little genius of hard work in the making.

"And if there's nothing in stock right now?"

"Sinsmas is next month!" She shifted her weight from one side to the next as her excitement started to get the best of her. Her eyes glanced up over his shoulder at the other adult Hound watching her, before she met his gaze again. "So, save it for the letter to Queen Bee!"

"That's–Yeah, that's right." Naruto sighed. He had told her that as well as that he could also buy it from the manufacturer if need be. He patted her on the head and turned her around. Her excitement became even more palpable. "Last rule?"

"If someone picks a fight, call you."

"Or Miss Loona." Naruto added, glancing up at his girlfriend while she scrolled through her phone. Her ear had been turned their way and she gave him a thumbs up. With that he looked back at his trembling pup and smirked. "Alright, Pickle. Ready? ...Go."

Dust was left in her wake, as were the two adult Hellhounds. Naruto rose back up and went back to Loona's side, content with waiting for her to start by reading any emails from work. It was about halfway through the current report from Team Echo on their observations during 'Operation: Hidden Viper' – he regrets giving Priscilla so much unchecked power in that regard; she was professional as fuck up until it came time for her to get involved with the more militaristic part of the job. Then her love of military fiction and spy thrillers reared its ugly head – that Loona removed her eyes from her phone.

"So, Blitzø's on board."

"Seems like it."

"What'd you say to him?" She asked, crossing her arms as she looked up at Naruto. He glanced away from Echo Two's noted complaints – five times he'd call in to be reminded why he was there; Naruto might have to slap the impatient, displaced dipshit with a reprimand. A single incident, team-wide pay cut might work. Kaine could get back to busting E.T.'s balls rather than try to bust Mitch's – to meet her crimson gaze.

"Like I said, it was a father to father conversation."

"Bullshit."

"Really." He smiled at her. She continued to give him a dubious glare and he rolled his eyes. "Alright, you got me. We also might have snorted some pup formula first."

"Pup formula?"

"Best high I've ever had." He put his phone away and gently took hold of her wrist to pull her close. He matched her warning growl with his own before they stopped. Slowly, he dipped his muzzle down to rub it against hers, and both of them gradually relaxed as he did. "We can do some tonight, y'know. A little energy boost before I work on my debt."

"Promises, promises, Babe." Loona leaned into his affectionate gesture before she started to return it. "What about dinner tonight?"

"We'll probably get takeout or something. Pickle isn't picky on her birthday or during the part…fuck." Naruto stopped. He stood up straight and stared into the crowd of Hounds in the store. "She's gonna want a party this weekend."

"So?"

"Loona, who do we know that loves parties and has it out for me?" He saw her open her mouth and added. "That isn't a Hellhound."

"Queen Bee." The answer came out in a growl before her eyes scrunched up and she pressed into him. "...Oh, shit."

"She's going to fucking try something," he said with a nod as he hugged her. "I won't let her ruin Pickle's sixth puppy party. It'll be the first one you attend, right?"

"Damn straight." Loona huffed. "..I don't want to talk about her."

"Okay." Naruto relented. He'd put his girlfriend through enough with his weird non-relationship with the Sin of Gluttony. He gently scratched the pretty She-Hound's back and smiled down at her. "What do you want to talk about?"

"Moving out of the apartment in Pride." She sighed and arched into his claw. "Fuck, that feels good. You got any places in mind?"

"Well, not for Blitzø yet. Gonna shop around." He admitted. He cracked a small smirk. "You? Well, I'm sure if we try to talk to her about it first, Pickle might be willing to share her room with you."

"Mm, tempting. It's a pretty nice room. And her carpet is soft."

"I love you." Naruto muttered, smiling down at the she-hound in his arms. Loona smiled back up at him. Her hand captured his cheek and guided him down to a quick kiss.

"Love you, too, Babe." She muttered after it broke. Her eyes searched his. "You serious about me moving in?"

"Dead ass." He nodded, his tail already wagging at the thought. He pushed his lips against hers again for another kiss and smiled at her when it broke. "Waking up with you in bed is one of the best parts of my day."

"Babe, you have an alarm set for five in the morning."

"And you still sleep with me."

"Only because you fuck me so good."

"You're a shit liar, Loo."

"Pretty sure you're worse, Rue."

"Oh, are you doing cutesy nicknames?" He rumbled at her as his tail wagged faster. From the corner of his eye, he saw her tail tip flicking back and forth rapidly. Her red eyes went half-lidded, even as her smile remained.

"Do you like it?"

"Almost as much as when you call me 'Daddy'." He growled as his blood started to pump faster. Loona growled back and clacked her teeth in front of his muzzle. He rumbled and nuzzled her again. "Promises, promises, Loona."

"Asshole." She hummed as she nuzzled back. "Yeah, fine. I'll move in with your sorry ass. Someone has to show your Puppy that she can't pull 'the eyes' every time she wants something."

"Said one of the hounds that fell victim to them."

"Only once to your... hm, let's see, how often did you succumb to them?"

"Point." Naruto chuckled. He pulled his head back and cradled her face in his hand. "As soon as we find you and Blitzø another apartment to call home, we'll start moving you in."

"But you said–?"

"I told him it would be your decision. And you might want to keep some shit with him. In case something happens or if you just need space." Naruto shrugged. He had a room in his house converted from an office space to a small in house weight room. It doubled as an escape whenever Pickle had to nap or if he was extremely stressed by something. Usually involving Pickle. Actually, he hadn't had to use it much since he and Loona hooked up…

"Can't believe you're making me wait that long." Loona's half-hearted grumble tore him from his thoughts.

"Look at it this way, Loo. You can still come over and make me pay my debt whenever you want." He smirked at her. "And you don't have to worry about getting back to your ring after."

"Would I have to anyway?"

"Fair." He chuckled. A call for his name had him pull her to his side. "Pickle's done. Let's get her checked out and then we'll hit the store you want to go to."

"You're buying?"

"It's what I said."

"Fuck yes." Loona grinned and slipped her arm around his waist before her clawed hand squeezed his ass through the Jean pocket there. "We've got collars to get."

"..Collars?"

"Yep. All three of us."

"I've made a terrible mistake." Naruto joked. Loona snorted and glanced up at him.

"Eight out of ten."

"Your standards are so fucking high, did they steal my stash?"

"Six out of ten."

He shook his head, smile still on his face and a wag still present in his tail. This bitch...he fucking loved her.

AN: Sweet merciful fuck that took forever to write! Ugh and it'll be harder to write with this new gig.

Middle Management sucks donkey dick!

Anyway, more puppies in the horizon!

Thanks for reading!