Chapter 7: How Did It End?
Despite Don's ever lingering presence around the Sertori house, Cleo had brought Lewis up to her bedroom for a few moments of privacy. She held his hand and ran her thumb across his knuckles. At dinner, conversation had been about Lewis' internship, and while his coming home early was a pleasant surprise, Cleo could not help but wonder exactly what brought him home an entire week sooner.
"Cleo, where were you today?" Lewis withdrew his hand from hers as he asked his question.
"I went for a swim, out to Mako." Cleo furrowed her brow. At what point had she decided to lie? It should be easy to tell her boyfriend that she had been concluding whatever business she had with Nate.
"The full moon is later this week." Lewis stated, almost as if Cleo didn't already know.
"I plan on spending the night in the moon pool, as always. You should join me." Cleo moved closer on the bed, her hands placed gently on Lewis' thigh. Her next words were a low whisper. "Give us some proper alone time, and there, I should not risk becoming drunk on moonlight."
"You mean that when you told Nate about your reactions to the full moon, he did not insist on spending that night with you?" The man's gaze was focused on the fish tank close to the bed. Cleo wished she had the confidence to reach out and force Lewis to look in her direction.
"That is not a topic that has come up." Other than the fact that the full moon was the catalyst for her change, it had not been a question that had been asked. It was not like she was a werewolf, only able to turn under the influence of the moon.
"But the nature of our relationship has."
Cleo's heart sank. She didn't have anything to say. What could she even say? She didn't bring up the conversation with Nate, and yet Lewis seemed to think she was the cause for her own prison.
"You know Nate as well as I do. He would ask that kind of question whether I was a human or mermaid. He has alway been a flirt, and an inappropriate one at that. I did not–"
"But you did not stop him. Whatever your response was… you told him about the intimate details between us."
"I did not give him more than what he assumed. Lewis, can we not enjoy the time we have together before you must go back to school? Nate swears every copy of that video has been deleted. There is no more proof of what I am in his hands. You're home, and I don't want to spend any of this time fighting with you. Please, Lewis, can we forget about Nate and spend our time together?"
"How much of your time has been spent with him?" Lewis finally turned his head to look at her. She could see the hurt in his eyes, and she wished that she could go back in time, to the last full moon, and leave the moon pool long before Nate ever would have gone diving that day.
"I spent today with him. I invited him to the moon pool, and after, he showed me some of his other underwater videos at his house." Cleo admitted and brought her hands back to her own lap. She closed her eyes to avoid the disappointment she was sure graced her boyfriend's face.
"Cleo, I'm going to go before your dad comes up and kicks me out." The mattress shifted as Lewis stood and walked out the door. His footsteps paused, "I love you, Cleo."
"I love you too, Lewis."
Cleo swam through the short tunnel into the small cave. The orange hue of the sunset faded with each foot she swam through the lava tube. Upon reaching the wider opening, the mermaid moved to the surface and lay along the small rock ledge just at the edge of the pool. Upon pushing the hair away from her face, she noticed the candles in the sand. She followed the trail of them until seeing them light up Lewis' face.
"I didn't think you'd actually come. I thought you were still mad at me." Cleo smiled and pulled herself out of the water. She brought her tail over the edge and reached out for Lewis to come to her. He sat beside her with a towel and began to dry her.
"I'm not mad at you. I'm mad at Nate. I'm mad at the circumstances. I've spent the last two days trying to come to terms with–" Lewis paused with a sigh. "I cannot imagine what it's been like for you to have to speak to him that much." He ran a hand through Cleo's hair, and she leaned into his touch.
"Pretty terrible." She brought her hand up to his and held it against her. "Did you talk to him?"
"I wish I hadn't."
"Let's forget about him." Cleo whispered. Within a few moments, she had fully dried and become human once more.
Lewis leaned in and pressed his lips against hers. She sat up and ran her hands through his hair and allowed herself to relax. Cleo pulled him against her, and she opened her lips to him. Her fingers tangled in his blonde hair. She had missed him. Not just the conversation, but the physical closeness of having him there. She laid back and pulled Lewis down with her.
"What are you doing?" He whispered against her lips, yet he still didn't pull away.
"I'm kissing my boyfriend," Cleo said through her kiss. She pressed herself against him, and in an instant Lewis pulled back. He sat on his heels and looked at her as she lay in the sand.
"Cleo…" He placed his hand on her knee. "You've never initiated something like this before." He gestured to her position on the ground. "Why now?"
"Is it crazy of me to want to have some sort of physical relationship with the person I'm dating?" Cleo leaned up on her elbows and shook her head. "I haven't seen you in almost a year. You've been gone, and every glimpse of you I get is from a blurry picture or a broken up video call. We're together, in person. I can actually touch you. Why do you want to fight with me?"
"Because it feels like you want to prove something." Lewis' voice echoed throughout the cave. The response shot an arrow through Cleo's heart. Was she trying to prove something, or was it that she truly wanted to be with him in every possible way?
"I missed you!" She yelled back and fully sat up. "Mentally, emotionally, physically! Long distance is especially hard when I only hear from you like once a week in an email."
"Do you want me to give up my scholarships and learning opportunities, Cleo?" He asked, and suddenly it was all back to the same question.
"No, but I want my boyfriend to actually be around. I don't care if we're hours apart. I'd like to be able to call you and actually reach you when I need you. Do you know how hard these past few months have been for me? Everyone I love who knows about mermaids is gone, on the other side of the world or entirely unreachable."
"Cleo-"
"No, Lewis! I don't think you actually understand how terrible it has been for me. Maybe my emails aren't detailed enough for you to understand. Everyone I love left, and while I'm happy for all of you to be chasing your dreams, I have been left behind."
"That's not fair to me, to any of us." Lewis stood up and paced the moon pool's cave. "You chose to stay here for school."
"As opposed to following you to America? What good would that have done when you were on your internship for months? An internship I could never have joined you in for the sake of my condition." Within moments of finishing, Cleo realized that maybe a future with Lewis would always be like it had been the last couple of months. He would always be finding a way to study the seas, and unless she became open about her secret to all, Cleo would always be left behind.
"What do you want from me?" He stopped and looked down at his girlfriend with his hands running through his hair.
"Lewis, in all of this time, I've only wanted you. I've wanted you through my first change, through learning my control, Charlotte, senior year, when you left–" Cleo took a long, deep breath. "Through this last year by myself. The only thing I've wanted was you, but maybe I'm holding you back."
"Is this about Nate?" He asked, and his posture straightened.
"No?" She looked up at him with confusion. "No, Nate has absolutely nothing to do with this. This is because for the next fifty years, I will continue to be a mermaid. I will not be able to join you on your adventures. The risk of the world discovering mermaids is too much for the wife of a marine biologist. You'll be out at sea, and I cannot be there with you. It's not like you're Zane and can fund your own adventures as he is with Rikki. I love you too much to keep holding you back, but at the same time, I can't keep living in misery without you here."
"Cleo." Lewis came closer and sat beside Cleo. He laced their fingers together.
"Lewis, no. I miss you too much when you're gone, but I cannot ask you to stay." Tears began streaming down her cheeks. She didn't pull her hands away. Cleo wished more than anything that it could be easy for their relationship to continue.
"So what does this mean for us?" Lewis kept his eyes trained on her face. Tears of his own began to fall and wet their hands between them.
"I can't spend my days and weeks wondering when you can send me an email. I need a boyfriend who will be there with me through it all. I thought love was enough, but you're a world away, and I'm tired of fighting.
"I love you."
"I love you too, but love just isn't enough to keep us happy anymore."
"So that's it? I don't get a say in if we end things?" Lewis' voice was pained, and while Cleo wanted nothing more than to forget the conversation ever happened, she knew it was the right choice in the long run.
"I can't go with you, and I can't ask you to stay. They say if you love something let it free. Lewis, go back to America and live your dreams. Study wild fish populations in the Gulf of Mexico. Get your degree. Be happy. If, in three years, you come back, and we can pick things right back up, I'd be happy to, but for now, I'm done with long distance. I miss you too much when you're gone, and now that you're back all we've done is fight. Please, Lewis, just go."
Cleo ripped her hands from his and dived into the moon pool. She stayed under the water as the moon passed over the dormant volcano and turned the water into moonlight. She allowed the comfort of the liquid to feel like home. When she surfaced again, the only evidence that Lewis had been there was the dying light of the candles he had abandoned in his exit. Her tears mixed with the salt water as the night of the full moon passed.