Moderation
[The scene opens with a shot of the city during the evening before it cuts to a shot of the casino as Aisha, Musa, and Tenca are seen walking past it on the right while Buster and Steele are seen walking past on the left. Stepping out of the door is a German Shepard with a creme, brown, and tan mix fur pattern, holding up a stack of cash in his hands with a look of satisfaction]
Charlie: Hehehe, looks like I still got it.
[Charlie walks to the left, the shot following him as he passes by Tina, Tails, and Fox walking in the opposite direction. If there is one thing to know about Charlie B. Barkin, it's that he's probably everything you would have to avoid being in hindsight, gambler, drinker, and bargains more often than what's necessary. He's certainly not a completely unpleasant individual, but he does have the tendency to come off as rather crass, even to those closest to him. Speaking of which, the shot cuts to Charlie's partner; Itchy Itchiford propped up against a lamp post, tapping his foot]
Itchy: [looks up at the clock nearby reading 7:15] Where is that Charlie, he'd betta' not have gotten wasted again.
[A whistle sounds off-screen and the Dachshund turns his head to the right to see Charlie approaching]
Itchy: There you are, I thought you were gonna leave me to starve.
Charlie: Oh, don't be such a drag, you know I'd never forget to feed us, I was just wrappin' up my streak at the casino, got us enough dough for a six-course meal and then some.
Itchy: Hmmmm, well, I see the cash, guess I can't complain too much.
Charlie: Would be music to my ears.
Itchy: Hey!
Charlie: Ah, I'm just joshin', ya' little knucklehead. [pulls Itchy into a headlock and noogies his head, causing his hat to fall off]
Itchy: Okay, okay, okay, I get the picture! [pulls himself out from the German Shepard's arm and looks up at his ruffled head] Thanks a lot…
Charlie: Hey, not my fault you look better this way.
Itchy: [picks his hat up from the ground] Real funny, Charlie…now, are we eatin' or what?
Charlie: Yeah, yeah, we're goin', man, I could use a drink when we get there.
[The two dogs are shown walking over to "Mary's Lighthouse" and entering the building. Inside, they make their way to the bar, attended to by Thomas and Scat, Bugs and Daffy, and Lyra and Bon Bon before sitting at their own seats]
Charlie: Well then, I'll get myself started with some Volka, how about you, Itch?
Itchy: I'll just take some rum punch, one of us needs to drag the other home afterward.
Charlie: Hey, I can control my alcohol just as much as the next guy.
Itchy: Oh, sure, I'll believe…Charlie!
Charlie: I'm right here, there's literally no reason to shout.
Itchy: No, I'm serious, look! [points to his left]
Charlie: What…[looks in the same direction]...ah, goddamnit.
Itchy: Is tha-
Charlie: Turn around.
Itchy: Wha-
Charlie: Just turn around, nothing to see there.
[The shot cuts to a Doberman Pinscher waiting to be seated]
Itchy: Hey, wait a minute, isn't that La-!
[Charlie wraps his paw around Itchy's mouth to shut him up]
Charlie: SSSSSSShut up, I don't wanna have a scene here of all places, what the hell is he doing here?
Itchy: And how's he here? Wasn't he an angel the last time we saw him?
Charlie: I dunno, maybe some magic shit happened and he's mortal once more, I don't fuckin' know.
Itchy: Well, why you so tense? I thought you didn't mind him.
Charlie: That's not the issue, it's…[sighs]...it's a reminder of something I'd rather not talk about.
Itchy: Ya' mean back when-
Charlie: SSSSSHUSH! We promised we'd never talk about that again, ever again.
Itchy: Okay, okay, geez, man, you're so pissy sometimes.
Charlie: [puts a paw on his forehead] Haaaaaaaaa, don't look left, don't look left.
[Unfortunately for Charlie, Lance is directed by Jenny to the bar and the Doberman catches glimpse of the two]
Lance: Charlie Barkin?
Charlie: [sweatdrops] Aaaaaah, fuckin' damn it.
Lance: Why, I never thought I'd see you two again, spare a seat for me?
Itchy: Oh yeah, there's a spot next to us.
Charlie: No, there isn't.
Itchy: [kicks Charlie under the table and gives a polite smile] AHEM, yes, there is.
Charlie: Did you just kick me?
Lance: Well, that's much appreciated, my good man, good to see someone still knows his manners.
Charlie: [under his breath] Manners smanners, kiss my ass.
Lance: What was that?
[Charlie swallows his pride and does his best attempt at a polite tone]
Charlie: Oh, nothing, just something in my throat, go on, take a seat…
[Lance takes the seat to Charlie's right, the German Shepard tapping his fingers on the table as he does so]
Lance: So, what have you two been up to, been keeping out of trouble I imagine?
Charlie: Well, if ya' wanna look at it like that, I prefer looking at it in the opposite direction.
Itchy: What he means is that ever since he got more leisure, he's been back at it with his antics.
Charlie: I don't recall you becoming the Virgin Mary either, then again, those ears do make ya' look like a nun.
Itchy: [scoffs] That's low, even fa' you.
Lance: Oh my…
Charlie: Oh, let me guess; you're gonna preach again about how I should keep my "attitude in check?" [takes the bottle of Volka handed to him as of on cue by Rocko] I tell ya'; I don't need no rulebook thumping on what I should and shouldn't be doin', I'm not a lil pup. [takes a drink from the bottle]
Lance: Well, actually, that's sorta what I wanted to talk to you about…
Charlie: [sighs] I guess I ain't gettin' outta this with you around…
Lance: You misunderstand, I guess I may have come on a little too strong back then.
Charlie: Oh, no, no, no, ya' didn't do anything like that, nothing about tryna' be the best thing since sliced bread or anything…
Lance: Before you become intoxicated, I'd just like to say that, well, I've moved past the principles I was following.
Charlie: Ya' what?
Lance: I'm not that big on the rules as I was before, I still follow them when necessary, but not to the projection as before…well, that, and how I felt like I was playing second fiddle in spite of doing what I thought was right.
Charlie: Hmmmmmmm, let me guess, a thin, pink powderpuff lookin' thing who thinks she knows everything cuz she's got that stupid halo above her head?
Lance: Well…
Charlie: Of course, typical Annabelle, glad I don't serve that bitch anymore, I prefer havin' my freedom.
Itchy: Yeah, I won't lie, I grew tired of listening to her a while back. [takes a gulp of his rum punch]
Charlie: Imagine taking orders from someone you scammed, what a fucking joke…[takes another gulp of his drink]
Lance: I see you've been taking it well.
Charlie: Aaaaaah, smartass…well, at least you got some common sense, now you can live the free life.
Lance: Which I assume the best pleasure are drinking and gambling?
Charlie: Heeeeeeey, don't be a pushover, it's an honest living…well, going by my definition of honest anyway.
Lance: I see…[turns to the bartender]...a glass of wine, if you don't mind?
[Rocko nods and fills the Doberman's glass before lifting the bottle]
Lance: Uh, actually, keep the bottle.
[The creme kangaroo nods and sets the bottle down]
Lance: Thank you.
Charlie: Thinking of drinking away your sorrows?
Lance: Very funny.
Itchy: You wanna come back to our place, we're on our way back after this, if his lord almighty allows it that is.
Charlie: I suppose it's not the worst thing imaginable, so long as he doesn't mind the state of the place.
Lance: If I can sit down somewhere that's at least comfortable, I think I can manage.
[The scene transitions to outside the restaurant as Balto and Tramp are seen walking away to the right as the trio comes out the door]
Charlie: I feel…[burps]...great, man, like really great…
Itchy: Aaaaaand you're drunk again.
Charlie: Whaaaaat, no, I, I'm fine, you, you're just a cocky little ssshhhhhhh-
Lance: Oooookay, someone needs water to sober them, just hope that's something you've got.
Charlie: Ah, come on, I'm fine, it's just a little-[hic]-buzz…
Itchy: Yeeeeeah, he's gonna feel that one in the mornin'.
[Itchy and Lance guide a slightly drunk Charlie along the street, just as Ace walks from the other side of the street and watches]
Ace: Hmph, once a drunk fool, always a drunk fool.
[The scene cuts to Charlie tripping on something and leaning into Lance]
Lance: Oh!
Charlie: Hey…h-has anyone ever-[hic]-told you that…ya', ya' look cute, like, lookit this face…
[Charlie puts his paws on the Doberman's face and mushes them while Lance looks on flustered. Ami and Makoto pass by and try hard not to stare before they're a good distance away]
Makoto: [snickers] Isn't that the cutest thing you've ever seen, never knew Charlie was more romantic when he's drunk.
Ami: I know it's not polite to stare at other people's business…[grins]...but truth be told, it is pretty funny.
Itchy: A'kay, Charlie, I think you've had enough. [pulls the German Shepard back]
Charlie: Aaaaaaaah, don't spoil ma' fun, it's ma' fun.
Itchy: [to Lance] This is why he has me.
Lance: Well, good to know someone's looking out for him.
Itchy: Well, ya' know, I'll always be there with him.
Charlie: Aaaaaaaaagh, don't remind me of that, what's her face is gonna creep back into my head…
Itchy: You mean Sas-
Charlie: Sh-Shut up!
Itchy: [smirks] Gets him everytime.
[The scene transitions over to a street where Itchy climbs up the steps to unlock the door]
Itchy: Alright, load 'im in, I'll get the water.
[Lance helps Charlie into the building, turning on the nearest lamp to give some light, revealing the complex. There are a few burn marks throughout, but it appears relatively intact, with a cabinet with a collection of bottles, a pool table, a model of the Golden Gate Bridge hanging up on the shelf, a set of cards scattered on the coffee table, and what appears to be a bar to serve drinks]
Lance: Hmm, nice place you got.
Charlie: Weeeeeeeeeeell, when you got it good like me, you can really dazzle the place…
Itchy: Hey, Dazzle, mind drinkin' this before you have a hangover?
Charlie: [swipes the glass from Itchy] You ain't gotta tell me what to do, a glass of water, ya' drink it, ain't rocket science.
[Charlie gulps down the water and sighs, dropping onto the couch]
Charlie: Aaaaaaaah, God, I feel like I could stay here and not move till I feel like it, nice and comfortable…
Itchy: [sits down next to Charlie] Live it up while ya' still can, that headache'll come back if you have another shot.
Charlie: Mmmmmmmmm, you smug little…hey, mind serving me up there, I'm feelin' a bit royal at the moment…
Itchy: Ya' seriously askin' me ta' rub ya' head, you're crazy sometimes.
Charlie: Hey, I don't wanna have ta' beg here.
Itchy: Alright, alright, have it your way, guess I'll save the day once again. [rubs on Charlie's temples as the German Shepard murrs]
Charlie: You ain't gotta be left outta this, come on up and tend to me from the other side.
Lance: I suppose you freely rubbing my face earlier gives me permission to rub on you, I must warn you, my paws are magic.
Charlie: Uh, yeah, yeah, whateva' you say, just get them down where they be of u…u…uuuuuuuuu…
Lance: [rubs down on Charlie's legs] I told you, guess I've still got it, impressed much?
Charlie: Haaaaaaa…okay, okay, color me impressed, this is nice…we gotta do this more often…
Lance: Well, so long as you'll have me, I wouldn't mind.
Itchy: I suppose there's no reason to moderate you drinking, since it's one of the few times you let someone else take the reigns.
Charlie: Hey, heeeeeeey…
Itchy: Ya' know I'm right.
Charlie: …Yeah.
The End