(A/N): We're back with Lisbet, Jerremyah and Leo. This chapter is mostly Lisbet's thoughts on everything that happened in the previous chapter, but it sets up some things that we'll be getting to shortly, so it is necessary, I promise.

So with this, the 450th chapter, we are now at over 700k words. Yay?

Trigger Warnings: Mentions of and references to child abuse, particularly physical abuse and neglect.

Lisbet

Things were... well, they were kind of insane, to be honest. Jerremyah had offered to help Leo- chains- and Leo had... thanked him. They'd both cut me off, and Jerremyah had even told him to ignore me- which he was going to pay dearly for, later. Then, Leo had asked Jerremyah why he was so willing to help him, and Jerremyah had- well, he hadn't explained much to Leo, but I knew what he meant nonetheless. I was sure Leo got the point, too, but the conversation had quickly turned.

Leo had tried to remove himself from my arms, something I would have been completely fine with if it had been what he actually wanted, rather than what he 'thought was the best'. I'd asked him whether he wanted me to leave, had even loosened my hold on him a little- and then, suddenly, he'd had a strong grip on both of my forearms.

He'd begun to practically reek of bitter anxiety and something sickly sweet that wasn't quite the same as fear- embarrassment, maybe? His gaze was still dropped, and his cheeks were flushed even before he started to stutter, fighting to try to get words to leave his mouth- preferably fully formed. I'd kissed his hairline, and he'd practically collapsed in my arms. He wasn't heavy- sure, I could feel his weight, bolstered by his height and the muscle he'd built while training, but it wasn't- it wasn't a burden. In fact... I saw it only as a gift. I simply supported him, and tried not to wonder whether I would've been capable of cradling his body in my arms like a baby, or whether his taller height would prevent me from doing so- I'd certainly have to be careful of any door frames, if I ever tried to attempt such a feat.

I'd asked him again if he wanted me to leave and he'd cut me off, but this time, it didn't annoy me in the slightest. I knew by this point that he was having trouble dealing with his emotions, and honestly, I was just glad he was speaking again. He'd said he didn't want me to leave, but that it'd been too long, and therefore, we should- something I knew he didn't really believe, even before he'd outright told me that he would never think it was too long. That he'd never think it was long enough- that he'd never think I was too much, I hoped against my better judgement.

I knew he'd looked to Jerremyah when I'd told him there was no one in the room that would care about how long we'd been holding each other, and that he- Jerremyah- had held his hands up, as though in surrender. No, Jerremyah didn't care. If anything, he delighted in it... and not just because I was his mate, and Leo was my kit. Jerremyah was quite a tactile person himself, when he got close to someone, and much like Leo, I don't think 'enough' was ever enough, for Jerremyah. After all, he'd stood with his arm over Leo's shoulder, one arm around me and both of his hands captured by Leo's for even longer than Leo and I had been hugging, and neither of them had so much as batted an eye, but now...

Maybe it was me. I'd proposed that Leo hadn't been used to physical contact with men when he'd frozen as Jerremyah had kissed his forehead, but maybe I'd overestimated how comfortable he was around women, as well. Or... perhaps I'd struck a nerve I hadn't known existed- Leo was, understandably, full of those. Jerremyah, I'd had a map for- although it almost certainly needed major changes made to it, now- but Leo... well, I suppose I needed to get my cartographer's tools ready.

I'd told him I would gladly hold him in my arms forever- whether that was a hug like this one, or like my earlier imagining, held to my chest in a very different manner- and he'd turned it back around on me, pointing out that 'forever' was a time frame that was far more achievable for me than it was for him. It was a good point, if painful, because even if he stayed mortal after the change- and therefore stayed alive- he would only have so many years to- to- It wasn't fair. He deserved better- he deserved forever, if that had been what he wanted. It's what I wanted for him- a selfish desire that I did not, in the slightest, feel guilty about. Still, I would much prefer him to be mortal- and alive- than immortal, and- chains. Obviously.

He said he'd do his best to even the odds between us- between the chances that I was more likely to achieve 'forever' than he was- and it reminded me of something he'd had said earlier, while we'd been alone. It had surely stuck in my mind because my heart had damn near cracked upon hearing it, and I felt like now was a good time to bring it up. Or, well, as good a time as ever.

"Speaking of not living forever," I felt his eyebrow rise halfway, like he was too tired to lift it any further. "You told me earlier that you thought a long life was 'never in the cards' for you... can you explain that to me, a little more?" His mouth twisted, and then he shrugged.

"Well, I mean... I figured if my family didn't kill me, something else would. Other purebloods, muggles, I don't know... a particularly ornery peacock. Whatever." I... what? "And then I found out what I was, and I-"

Wait... he was worried about his family killing him before he'd found out what he was? In fact, it had seemed to be his main concern, if the way he'd phrased the whole thing was correct- which I didn't really have a choice but to believe. Not that I thought he was lying, or even merely misrepresenting things, but I just felt the need to mentally acknowledge the fact that we were entirely at the mercy of his view of everything- his version of events- which... could be quite dangerous, if we were to forget about it. It wasn't as if we hadn't learned something from Leo in the past, only to have our opinion of the event- or thing, in general- thrown into question when we'd discovered a more impartial description of it. Leo, much like I was, was biased- but it just so happened that that bias seemed to be entirely unpredictable, and therefore, incredibly dangerous.

"You were worried about your- family- before you found out- before they- before?" Jerremyah stuttered out, and I was secretly glad, because I honestly doubted that I could have done any better. Spoken any clearer.

Leo shrugged again, like this was nothing. "Of course. There was a lot of talk of- consequences, if I chose to step out of line. Most were mild, but some-" I didn't trust that. Leo's definition of 'mild' was dubious at best, outright suspicious at worst.

"Example?" He blinked. "Give me an example of one of your 'steps out of line', and the 'mild' consequences you suffered in return." He tilted his head back again, so he could finally look me in the face again.

"I don't remember most of them-"

"Liar." He stiffened, and I amended myself, knowing the accusation could seem harsh- especially to someone like Leo, about a subject like this one. I brought my hands up and wibbled his cheeks lightly, which seemed to force him to relax a little. "There are things a child doesn't readily forget- cruelty is one of them." I made sure not to glance at Jerremyah, and not just because I was carefully monitoring Leo's reaction. He avoided my eyes for a few seconds, but when he eventually met them again, I knew I'd hit a rather emotional nerve. I opened my mouth to try to console him, but he cut me off before I could.

"And kindness is another." He said quietly, which... of course he would focus on that. Of course.

"Did you experience much of that one?" Unfortunately, he hesitated.

"Not... not as often as the former," He said somewhat stiffly- was that the sensitive subject matter that was making him uncomfortable, or...? "Not at that point in my life- before." It- it hit me then, what he was saying. Not so much in words, but the tone of his voice, the emotion behind it, when he spoke about it. He'd referred to it as 'before'- he was drawing a line in the sand, between 'before' and 'after'-

Before he'd found out what he was, and after- because his life had changed irreparably. He had changed irreparably- except... he hadn't. Not really. Nothing had truly changed, other than the fact that now he knew, and how people treated him. How they chose to treat him. Well, I was choosing to treat him like my s- kit. My kit. My. Kit.

Maybe I couldn't make up for the way others treated him, but... I had to try. I had to- because any other option made me feel like my chest was going to split open, and even if I would offer Leo my still- definitely not beating- heart, just as I would Jerremyah... I didn't plan to do so any time soon. No, my heart needed to stay in my chest for now, to remind me of all the love I needed to give him- the love he'd been missing for so long.

"Example?" I croaked out, and even though he eyed me a little oddly, he obliged my request.

"Whenever I was late for my lessons, she'd send me to bed early." Well... that didn't seem so bad, at least- "The later I was, the earlier I went to bed. One minute late was one hour early, and so on and so on." Jerremyah and I shared a look chock-full of dread, and I saw his tongue dart out to moisten his lips.

"What- what if you were really late? Like, longer than a few minutes?" Leo shrugged, but his eyes didn't quite reach either of ours, so I knew the answer wasn't going to be good. Not that pretty much anything was, when Cipicia Joannis was involved.

"Unless I had a really, really good reason-" I was guessing an upset tummy wasn't good enough. "Then I'd be sent to bed that many hours early- no matter how many meals it meant I skipped." Oh, God... I considered doing some very illegal things to get my hands on a time turner and go back to this morning, where I could make him thirty sandwiches, instead of a mere four.

"Leo-" He cut Jerremyah off. Or, well, I doubted it was quite that intentional. I think he just started to talk, and couldn't stop until he'd finished what he was saying.

"Of course, she wouldn't want me to miss lessons the next day, so if I was more than a certain amount of minutes late, I got a different punishment." I saw him visibly brace himself, briefly holding his breath, before loosing it in one long exhale. "There were a lot of things she did, depending on the severity of my disobedience, and her mood, but... the crop was one of my least favorites." My blood ran cold- no. No, no, no, no, no- not again!

(A/N): Lisbet: 'I wonder if I could carry him (Leo) like a baby.'

Leo: '...we could... try it?'

Lisbet: 'No, no, I think I'll just... continue to imagine it.'

Leo: 'Um... okay, I guess.'

Lisbet: *sighs wistfully*

Leo: '...'

Leo: 'PLEASE, can we try it?!'

also

Me: *writing like, three lines*

Me: 'Soooo... can I cross that off the to-do list, now?'

'Things Leo, Lisbet and Jerremyah have to talk about' (the to-do list for this conversation): 'Uh, no. Definitely not. Get your shit together.'

also

Lisbet: 'Leo's an unreliable narrator, we have to take everything he says with a grain of salt.'

Leo: 'I replaced all the salt in the house with sugar.'

Lisbet: *eyeing the salt/sugar suspiciously*

Jerremyah: *dumping half a salt shaker in his mouth*

Jerremyah: 'Ach- ugh! That one- that one's a lie.'

Leo: *genuinely confused because he could have sworn he DID replace them all*

Jo: *re-replaced that PARTICULAR salt shaker, just for the chance to make Jerremyah suffer*

Danniel: *helped Leo replace them all, then saw Jo re-replace this one, and happily took more than his fair share of bribes to keep quiet about both schemes*

Herc: *knows that he's cooking with sugar instead of salt, doesn't care because Leo's the only one that ever eats, and if he can't deal with the unforeseen consequences of his schemes, then that's his problem*

Shari: *bought back-up snacks for Leo*

Grey: *licks the salt off his own finger*

Grey: 'Tastes like sugar to me.'

Jerremyah: *confused puppy look*

Jerremyah: 'Wait, really? Let me try it again-'

Lisbet: *rolling her eyes, but not interfering*

Leo: *...also considering trying it*

Lisbet: *interfering!*