Chapter 13 A Possible Metamorphosis

Lemmy couldn't turn away from he board. His pounding heart got louder and louder, the void in his chest growing to match. He was frozen in place, frozen in time. Nothing else mattered. Nothing else was even present.

"Oh, sweet!" Benny said. "I passed the first round!"

"Chester and I did too!" Luanne exclaimed. She turned to Chester, her eyes sparkling. "Isn't that great?"

"Unfathomably so," Chester said with a smirk. He looked toward the board. "And it looks like… wow. Holy crap, Lemmy didn't pass. Huh. I guess people don't have a bias after all."

Lemmy whimpered as Benny and Luanne turned to him. "Oh man, Lemmy, I'm so sorry," Luanne said.

"Yeah!" Benny approached. "That must sting, dude." He patted Lemmy on the shoulder. "If it was up to me, you would've gotten a unanimous win."

Directing his gaze toward the ground, feeling a shame so strong and poignant, Lemmy answered Benny. "Thanks, Benny."

"Are you gonna be okay?" It was Chester of all people who had asked that question. Looking at him, Lemmy was able to see genuine sympathy in his eyes. It was so strange and went against literally everything Lemmy thought he knew about the bob-omb, but it was appreciated.

"I"ll manage." The growing chatter of everyone else in the room drowned out Lemmy's heartbeat and thoughts. Deciding that he might as well go back to his room so he could have at least a few minutes all to himself, Lemmy snuck out of the crowd. The void in his soul continued growing. Part of him was tempted to cry, but he ultimately decided against it. At best, that would make him look weak. At worst, it would make him look like the most sore loser of all time.

As he made his way over to the elevator, Lemmy seriously considered everything about this competition. Maybe it was foolish of him to put so much of his hope in this contest going in the direction he wanted it to. Maybe it was just him hopelessly seeking validation. Maybe it was him being a big moron. Maybe… maybe he really wasn't as funny as he thought or hoped he was. All the effort he put into perfecting his clown acts would've been better spent doing something else. Like learning to be an accountant, or being a tax collector. Both jobs were boring as sin, but considering that this loss (the embarrassing, humiliating loss) proved that he had no business in the world of entertainment, that was the best thing Lemmy could do with his miserable life, right?

Lemmy whimpered again as the elevator rose to his floor. Oh, how was he going to face his siblings? He'd have to call them eventually in order to let them know that he had lost the first round. He would have to subject himself to the disappointment in their tones and faces. He would have to break the news to them that, no, Lemmy wasn't funny. He didn't inspire any form of positive emotion in an audience. He was a joke, ironically enough. He was a joke of a clown, and not in the positive sense.

When the elevator arrived on his floor, Lemmy dragged himself toward his room. He wanted to crawl in bed and stay there for the rest of the day. He never wanted to show his face to anyone competing in this competition ever again. Sure, some of them had been genuinely kind to him, but… could he allow himself to spend time with people who the general audience had deemed funnier than him? Sure, jealousy was probably the most petty emotion he could possibly feel at the moment, but it was the feeling taking up the forefront of Lemmy's mind. He was jealous of all of them. Luanne, Benny, Chester, Patty. Oh, Patty especially earned his jealousy. He wasn't even mad at her; sure, she had beaten him, but he wasn't upset at her specifically. He was just jealous, supremely and terribly jealous.

After what felt like an eternity, Lemmy finally got back to his hotel room. He stood in the doorway, looking upon the room. The beautiful, expensive, amazing room that deserves to be vacated by someone much funnier than he was. Whimpering again, Lemmy lugged himself over to the bed. He plopped himself down, noting that the cushy softness was overpowering. It was almost enough to distract him, almost enough to help him feel better.

Almost. He still felt like crap on a stick. And… considering how much he loved clowning around, considering that he invested so much time into his comedy and jokes, being told that he wasn't good enough to pass even the first round of the Koopa Kingdom's Ultimate Laugh-Off felt like an especially deadly punch in the face. His whole world was crashing down on itself, and really, why wouldn't it? He had built his world on the flimsiest, most wobbly foundation anyone could lay eyes on. He had shown the world just how foolish he was, so it only made sense that everything would not fall into place.

Sighing, Lemmy turned over on his side. He really did plan on staying here for a good long while. He would sleep the night away, and then that would be it. He would go home and build a new identity for himself. He would find out where to go from here, and he would leave comedy here in this hotel. He wouldn't turn back. He wouldn't be allowed to turn back. Closing his eyes, Lemmy prepared himself for the strong sleep he longed for to overcome him when…

"Lemmy?"

Lemmy blinked. Getting up, he made his way over to the door, unsure how to feel when he saw Luanne on the other side. She peered at him with a sympathy stronger than most people could fathom. It made Lemmy feel so weird; on the one hand, he appreciated it, on the other, it felt a tad patronizing.

"What is it, Luanne?"

Luanne stepped closer to him. "Can I come in?"

"Why?"

"Because I want to help make this better." Luanne took another step forward. "I could tell when you left that you were really distraught. None of us were happy to see that, not even Chester. So… I wanted to help in any way I could."

A lump formed in Lemmy's throat. "There's nothing to help with. I lost, simply as that." He grabbed hold of the doorknob and prepared to close the door, but Luanne put her foot in its path.

"Lemmy, please. You don't have to be so cold towards me. I get it. I know that this whole thing is hard." Luanne's expression shifted from sympathy to empathy. "I've been where you are. I know what you're going through." Lemmy raised an eyebrow and opened the door. She sighed. "I've lost contests too. Contests that I was emotionally invested in."

"Really?"

"Yeah." Luanne looked into the room. "If you let me come in, I can tell you about it."

Lemmy thought about this before grunting. He opened the door all the way, and the grateful Luanne stepped in. As Lemmy closed the door, she kept her eyes on him. He didn't know how to feel while on the receiving end of her gaze, he really didn't.

"Thank you." Luanne sucked in a breath. "When I was little, I wanted to be a writer. I was subscribed to this literary magazine, and they held this contest one time. The winner would get their own place on the first page. I spent a month planning my short story, I spent half of that month not getting any sleep whatsoever, and… I didn't win. I didn't even appear in the magazine. No honorable mention, no consolation prize."

Lemmy stared at her. "Wow." He stepped towards her. "That sucks. I'm sorry."

"It's okay, Lemmy." Luanne smiled. "Number one, I've since gotten over it. I mean, yes, it sucked at the time, but now I can look back on that time in a more positive way. Number two, I didn't tell that story because I wanted you to feel bad for me. I wanted to put things in perspective, to help you know that you have someone who can relate to you. And number three…" Luanne beamed. "I didn't tell you what came from that loss." Blinking, Lemmy stepped closer toward her. Her smile got bigger. "You might be tempted to think that I completely gave up on writing after that contest, and I did consider doing that. But I didn't. I realized that I could use my talents in a way that's much more finely tuned to my personality and what I wanted to do with my life. So, I started writing stand-up skits. And I've gotten MUCH more positive reception from people with my comedy. And so, my dream shifted from wanting to be a world-famous novelist to a stand-up comedian. Maybe you could go through something similar." Luanne's eyes sparkled like nobody's business. "You could have your own form of a metamorphosis, and you could come out the other side a stronger person!"

Lemmy stared at Luanne in awe. Those words, as well as the enthusiasm she used to deliver them… wow. That was the only thing he could really say: wow. Lemmy felt different just listening to it.

At least, for a millisecond. "That's really nice, Luanne, but…" Lemmy frowned. "I've lived my entire life hoping to be a clown. It's the only thing I know, and I don't know what else I could do aside from that. I'm not physically strong. I wouldn't consider myself a stupid koopa, but I'm not a brainiac either. I wouldn't feel comfortable in an office setting, and I wouldn't feel comfortable in a line of work that doesn't involve comedy." Lemmy directed his gaze toward the floor again. "Comedy is my one true passion, the one area of my life where I could potentially thrive. If I can't have that… I don't know how I would be able to function. I want to be a clown. I want… to make people happy."

A silence settled over the scene. Carefully and slowly, Luanne stepped toward Lemmy. "I'm sure you can figure it out. And hey, maybe your path doesn't involve you giving up clowning completely. Like I said, I didn't give up writing completely. Maybe you can make people happy in a completely new and unique way."

Lemmy sighed. "Maybe. I don't know…"

"Again, that's alright." Luanne adjusted her stance. "Look, why don't we just put this on the backburner for right now. Rouge said before you left that she's hosting a banquet downstairs for everyone who competed in the first round, even those who got eliminated. I think some good food might help you feel better."

Lemmy chuckled. "It would take a miracle to help me feel better. But… food is the next best thing." He laughed. "Especially if there's pizza on that table."

"I think there will be! Rouge said she was mainly considering Italian cuisine."

"Nice! I'm sold!" Lemmy smiled, the expression a little weak at first but slowly blooming into a stronger expression. "Thanks, Luanne. You're very kind."

"It's my pleasure, Lemmy." She smiled at him. "Anything for a fellow aspiring comedian."

Lemmy felt a pang when he heard that, but it was significantly less painful than it could've been. Thanking Luanne one more time and promising that he would definitely attend the banquet, he got back in bed as the goomba girl left the room. Yeah, there may be some truth in her words. They hurt, but she might be right. And hey, she said he didn't have to worry about solving everything right at the moment. He could just kick back, relax, and enjoy life.

And that was exactly what he was going to do. Getting under the covers again, he snuggled into the bed and went to sleep.

…

Patty smiled as she brushed her hair in the mirror. Oh man oh man oh MAN, she was on top of the world! She couldn't believe that she had passed the first round! It felt so unreal, like she was going to wake up tomorrow morning and find out that she had slept through the actual competition! This was just amazing. She couldn't remember the last time she felt this happy or proud about anything.

Grinning at her reflection, she placed the brush down on the dresser. Admiring herself in every which way, she thought about what she was going to do from this point on. She needed to start thinking about the next round. That was a round where she had to bring her A-game, where she had to step up a little bit. She had wowed the audience in round one, and she was going to double that wow factor in round 2. She just knew it.

"You got this, Patty," she told herself. "You are going to win this entire thing, and it's going to be legen… wait for it…"

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK!

Feeling a bit disappointed she didn't get to say the second half of the word, Patty made her way over to the door. When she saw who was on the other side, she gasped in delight. "Rouge! What are you doing here?"

"Hello, Patty." Rouge stepped closer. "I must congratulate you for clearing the first round of the Laugh-Off."

"Oh! Thank you!" Patty giggled as Rouge closed the door behind her. "It was quite a surprise, but definitely a welcome one! I am going to put my all into the rest of…" she stopped. Feeling a bit unease, she pointed toward Rouge. "Uh… what are you holding behind you?"

Rouge grinned. It wasn't a happy grin, a pleased grin, or an empathetic grin. It was a wicked grin, a malicious grin. An evil grin. Without any words, she revealed what she had been holding behind her back. Patty gasped, about to scream…