Tseng sat down at his desk, readjusting his tie and smoothing out his hair, which he was still wearing open because the bruise on his face was still dark and purple on his skin. Rufus made no secret of it that he liked it very much whenever he wore his hair open, and Tseng himself could not deny that it did not look bad, but it was simply too impractical for everyday life. That Rufus had a habit of messing up his hair in various ways whenever they made out also did not help in warming him up to wearing it open. He sent an e-mail to Chief Veld, explaining the fanclub situation to him. While his actual identity had not been revealed, the photo established a very clear connection between his face and the vice president and thereby the Shinra Company. After the broadcast on WC1, they had lost the option to simply claim that Tseng was not part of the company to cover up Shinra's involvement in the bombing in Wutai, if that was even the plan.
Chief Veld responded quickly that he had the situation covered, while informing him that his parents had already inquired with the General Affairs Department because they thought they had recognized their son in the TV broadcast. The news did not come unexpected, but it still made Tseng's heart drop. He had had no contact with his parents for years, but it was devastating to know that they had spotted a glimmer of hope that their son was still alive, only to have them crushed by Veld's insistence that he was dead. But he never wanted them to see what kind of person he had become, and so, it was for the better.
When he finally managed to push the thoughts aside, he turned his attention to Zack's message that he had received a while ago, which read: "Thanks again for yesterday. I did some training with Sephiroth today. I think he had fun. He seems a lot better. Why don't you try talking to him again?" It sounded almost too good to be true that Sephiroth would voluntarily come out of his room to do something with Zack and enjoy it.
Although Tseng was less optimistic about the prospect of Sephiroth responding as positively to him as he did to Zack, he decided to at least make an attempt. And so, he wrote: "How are you? What did you find in the archive? Let me know if you need anything." After reconsidering for a moment, he deleted the words and typed: "Zack told me you trained with him today. I hope you are doing okay. Let me know if you need anything." He scratched his head, deleted the text again and put down his phone. It used to be so easy for him to talk to Sephiroth, but now he had no idea how to do something as mundane as asking him how he was doing.
He shook his head and picked up his phone again to type: "Let me know if you need anything", and forced himself to send the message without thinking about it any longer. A few minutes later, his phone beeped with a message from Sephiroth: "There's a package in front of my door." Tseng breathed a sigh of frustration. He had no idea what he had expected. It was not much, but this was the first time Sephiroth had given him a response at all since they returned from Wutai. "I'll pick it up in bit", he answered and was gratified almost instantly by a reply that made Tseng raise his eyebrows: "Thanks". To hear not once, but twice in a single day from Sephiroth felt almost unreal. Training with Zack must have worked some kind of magic on Sephiroth that made him almost one fifth as sociable as the average person.
Too distracted by this morning's events to keep at his desk work, Tseng dropped his pen sometime in the early afternoon, pocketed his phone and gun and left his office for the helipad after saying goodbye to Rufus for the day. When he reached Sephiroth's apartment, he was quite surprised not to find the package outside his door that he had claimed was there. Had someone else picked it up? Or had Sephiroth taken it inside, contrary to his habits and the understanding between him and the Turks, who were supposed to take these undesired displays of attention off of his hands to spare him the discomfort of having to dispose of them himself. Not that he was not allowed to take and keep these packages, but as far as Tseng knew, Sephiroth loathed the "gifts" from his "secret admirer", whose identity he was well aware of, despite all of his pretense to be ignorant about it. Or perhaps he had realized that this package was actually from someone else and taken it inside after all.
Uncertain about the situation, Tseng knocked softly on Sephiroth's door to ask him personally what he wanted him to do. The door slid open to reveal Sephiroth's tall figure, to Tseng's surprise, dressed in loose Wutaian pants and a sleeveless turtleneck sweater. Tseng had not seen Sephiroth wearing casual clothes in years, so he really had no idea what Sephiroth wore these days. Despite his history and connections with Wutai, this still seemed like a strange choice. At least at first glance. The truth was that Sephiroth, despite acting nonchalant about it, usually chose to wear what looked the best on him. And I think he also quite enjoyed the mobility this particular style of pants offered.
"Sorry to bother you", Tseng began stiffly. "There's no package here. I just wanted to double-check if it has been picked up already or…" He hesitated for a moment before continuing: "Or if you decided to keep it." Sephiroth looked down on him with a face mostly devoid of expression, and Tseng got none the wiser when their eyes met for a brief moment. When Sephiroth's eyes wandered down Tseng's face, he asked: "Did your boyfriend hit you?" Tseng brushed his hair down the side of his face to hide the bruise and responded with embarrassment: "A ninja kicked me during a mission to Wutai", conveniently leaving out the fact that the "ninja" had been a little girl. "It's answer three", Sephiroth finally replied, stepped away from the door, turned around and walked away silently without closing the door. Too surprised to react immediately, Tseng stared at his back as he left. What was answer three? Sephiroth did not have a habit of playing practical jokes on people, or tricking them. The door was still open and Sephiroth was out of sight. Did he expect Tseng to come in?
Carefully, Tseng stepped over the doorstep and, encouraged by not having the edge of a blade at his throat, he moved on until he passed the second door that led into the living room, where Sephiroth was sitting on the floor, his legs crossed, with documents on the coffee table, pouring tea. It was rather unusual to see a person sitting on the floor as opposed to a chair or a couch, both of which Sephiroth owned. Answer three was immediately clarified when he spotted a second teacup on the coffee table, which Sephiroth was now pouring tea into, but no package anywhere. He sighed, uncertain what to make of the situation, but Sephiroth continued to ignore him, put down the teapot and simply sipped his tea from his cup. Tseng swallowed the comment he had on his tongue, simply because he knew perfectly that Sephiroth was not one to explain himself with words, said "Sorry for intruding", and stepped through the second door.
He moved further into the room until he reached the coffee table and sat down on the floor across from Sephiroth, who appeared to be reading in the documents spread out on the table. One glance at the papers told Tseng that these were documents from the archive. Not the exact same ones he had been asking for, but treating a related topic. "Who gave you permission to borrow files from the archives?", he began, lacking a better conversation starter. Sephiroth only shrugged in response, stating: "No one tried to stop me." After a short pause, he added: "I'll return them when I've finished reading." Sephiroth's usual approach of simply doing whatever he wanted because no one could actually stop him worked most of the time. There were only a few people he did not dare to do this with. In a way, he was a trained fighting dog, but the person who had conditioned him had made certain that he would not bite the hand that fed him. Seeing the two of them sitting there reminded me of the good times we had, back when it was still us and Sephiroth, and we used to sit around this table just like this, Sephiroth on the floor, and Genesis and I on the couch. I was overcome by the urge to sit with them and took my usual place to Sephiroth's right, on the opposite side of the couch, which had been painfully vacant ever since Genesis disappeared.
As Sephiroth continued to flip through the pages for a few moments longer, I felt as if he looked at me at some point, although I was certain that he could not see me. His eyes that were still so pretty despite the changes they had undergone were simply following an old habit that they had not yet lost. His eyes wandered back to the company that was actually present, when Tseng tried a different topic: "So you're interested in the Ancients these days?" Sephiroth sighed, gathered the loose pages into the folder and closed it. "Did you realize that someone shuffled the documents around?", Sephiroth asked back, which caused Tseng to scratch his neck. "It doesn't seem to be random either. There appears to be some system to it." Tseng nodded. "We figured that out a while ago, but the files you're looking for aren't there." Sephiroth studied him doubtfully, his eyes piercing his very soul. "How do you know that? Did you search the whole archive?" Tseng shook his head. "We solved the puzzle, but the files are not where they would be if the pattern was consistent." When Sephiroth did not look convinced, Tseng added: "I think they were removed by whoever did this and they made a mess of the rest to hide the fact." Sephiroth stared at the file on the table for a moment, and inquired: "Is it who I think it is?" Tseng picked up the small teacup and sipped to buy himself some time, uncertain if he should answer this question. He grimaced when he got the first taste of the tea. That was not very surprising because Sephiroth made his tea very, very strong. If Tseng was a more seasoned tea drinker, he could have told from the dark, murky color of the liquid in his cup how bitter the experience would be. "Probably", Tseng finally said in response to Sephiroth's question, who folded his arms, looking annoyed.
Sitting with Sephiroth in silence after that person had been brought up made Tseng a little uncomfortable, because he had no idea how to continue the conversation. He picked up the cup again, now knowing what to expect, and sipped. "So, how's the vice president?" The sudden inquiry made Tseng choke on his tea. Coughing, he put the cup down. Sephiroth's expression almost showed an air of triumph upon watching Tseng's reaction to the carefully timed question. Tseng, knowing that Sephiroth had looked right through him, suppressed the urge to claim that he had not talked to the vice president, and instead responded: "He's fine, thank you". He wanted to bite his tongue for his careless choice of words, cleared his throat and corrected himself: "He's fine". Sephiroth leaned his elbow on the coffee table and rested his chin on the palm of his hand, studying Tseng somewhat curiously. "Do you think that's really a good idea?", he wanted to know. Tseng folded his arms and looked away as he always did when he did not want to talk about something. Funnily enough, this was exactly the same way Sephiroth reacted whenever he was too uncomfortable or unwilling to answer. Tseng had asked himself the same question many times, and his answer had not changed at all since the very beginning. It would have been easy to explain it away by him just doing his job, but if he did that, he would be lying to himself, and Sephiroth, being the living lie detector that he was, would see right through him.
When he did not say anything, it was Sephiroth's turn to fold his arms and lean on the table, putting on a serious face. Apparently having drawn his own conclusions, he continued: "Tseng, you know these people." The addressed looked up in surprise, and Sephiroth went on: "They will sacrifice you to achieve their own goals without thinking twice. Your life means nothing to them." Hearing these words from Sephiroth made Tseng feel unexpectedly warm on the inside. In an attempt to change the topic, he picked up his cup again and sipped more of the bitter liquid that did not taste so unpleasant anymore. Chuckling, he responded: "Look at you, giving me relationship advice like a proper adult. But I'm a little surprised", he continued. "All this time I thought you couldn't care less if I died." His arms still folded, Sephiroth looked down at the table. This was an aspect of Sephiroth's life that I, too, did not know as much about as I would have liked. Sephiroth did not like talking about his feelings and opinions if they concerned himself or his past, even to me. Although I had in the meantime pieced together what was going on between them or rather had in the past, Sephiroth's current feelings about the situation still eluded me.
My tension was relieved when Sephiroth finally opened up: "I was never angry with you. I suppose I should not have expected anything else". Had I known back then what I did now about Tseng, I could have told him so. Tseng was very sexually motivated, and with his preferences being what they were, it was no surprise that he was not at all attracted to Sephiroth, no matter how beautiful he was. "No, I was flattered", Tseng objected. "Very much, in fact. But you know…" Sephiroth shook his head. "No, it's alright. I understand." But Tseng continued stoically: "I thought you were just curious. Because you grew up very sheltered and didn't know anything outside your little cocoon." He scratched his head. "I didn't realize it was that serious." Sephiroth and I both stared at him, a little surprised at these revelations. "And given how badly you took it, I thought it would be better if we didn't work together anymore." On second thought, it was very much like Sephiroth to have believed all this time that he simply was not good enough. And it was even more so like Tseng, even if he would not admit it if he was asked about it, to have acted the way he did out of a desire to protect the feelings of a person that was important to him.
I looked back at Sephiroth, who had lowered his eyes and was now staring at his hand resting in his lap as if he was thinking. I myself did not really know what to make of the situation. All this time, I thought Sephiroth disliked Tseng, but this was apparently not the case, and had never been so. I did not even know if I should be jealous or not. "Was this what you wanted to talk about?" Sephiroth looked up at Tseng's rational tone. His mouth twitched as he struggled to answer: "I guess I just wanted to get this off my back before…" I was observing him closely as his voice broke, helplessly, because I could not even touch him. "Before?", Tseng repeated tensely, looking at him inquisitively.
In response, Sephiroth touched his forehead for a moment as if that explained anything, but I already knew where this was going, and it hurt. After Genesis and then me, now Sephiroth was affected. I do not quite know why, but I had thought that somehow, he would not go down the same route as us. Perhaps it was because Genesis and I were Hollander's creations, and Sephiroth was Hojo's. We had no idea where he really came from, but It was not too far-fetched that he, too, had been artificially created in some way or another, but he had been fine, physically, until now. "Just look at me", Sephiroth pressed out full of desperation. Tseng looked him straight in the eyes, but said nothing, and Sephiroth continued: "And it's not just this. "Sometimes…" He looked away and lowered his hand, which caused his hair to fall into his face. "Sometimes I feel like…" His voice broke off again. My own hands were shaking at this point. From the changes I went through, I knew how scary it was. But he was talking about the other thing that had affected him for a long time. Genesis and I were different from him because we never lost control of ourselves, even in the thick of battle. And judging by his behavior in Wutai, he was getting worse.
Tseng looked as helpless as I felt, but when Sephiroth did not continue, he stood up and walked over to him. He flinched when Tseng drew a little closer and lightly touched his hand. Tseng's voice was a little shaky when he said: "Sephiroth, is there anything I can do to help?"