Chapter 18: More than my queen

By evening, everything had been set up for Mia's sleepover. Clarisse had gone out into the gardens to take Maurice for a walk. She was quickly joined by Joseph.

"Oh Joseph." Clarisse said as she saw him approach.

"It's a beautiful night, I figured you'd want to take a little walk with Maurice." He told her, placing his hand on her lower back to guide her through the flower-filled paths.

"Indeed. So, are the girls having fun?" Clarisse asked.

"Yes, a lot. They're chatting and laughing." He said.

"The party really seems to be a success." Clarisse smiled.

"Yes indeed." Joseph replied.

"But at this time, haven't you usually finished your shift?" She asked.

"Yes, but I wanted to make sure everything was okay and I wanted to come and greet you before going up to my room." Joseph told him, smiling slightly.

"What a thoughtful gesture." She told him, cupping his cheek.

They walked for a few more minutes before Clarisse went back to the palace to enjoy the party with the girls a little. Joseph went up to his room.

June 22, 2006

The next day, Clarisse had been very busy with the wedding preparations. Joseph had had a security meeting with the night shift, for the security of the wedding night. After his meeting, he had the arrangements for travel between the church and the palace for the ceremony, to organize with his team. There were going to be huge crowds in the streets for the event, so everything had to be taken into consideration.

That evening, Joseph was doing a security round outside the palace, when he heard music coming from the throne room. Earlier in the day, Charlotte had told him that the Queen was to make the musical selections for the wedding reception. So, he suspected Clarisse was there. He walked in and saw her waltzing alone. Without making a sound, he entered her arms to waltz her. She was surprised and then laughed. They were both waltzing and enjoying the moment. Clarisse rested her head against his chest and inhaled his sweet masculine scent that she loved so much. Joseph had spent most of the day talking about the royal wedding, whether they liked it or not, he had been thinking about his proposal to Clarisse all day.

"Have you thought about us?" he asked.

Clarisse lifted her head and then looked him in the eyes.

"Yes, I have thought about it." She said simply.

Joseph could see in her face that her answer was not what he had hoped for. He felt his heart break.

"Okay. Please excuse me." He said before getting out of her arms.

Joseph headed towards the door leading outside, through which he had entered earlier, but Clarisse caught up with him and grabbed his hand to stop him.

"No Joseph. I'm sure you knew what I was going to say. I. Mia needs me more than ever. The kingdom, I am the Queen, it is my responsibility. You know what that is." She said.

Meanwhile, they did not realize that Charlotte had appeared at the top of one of the large staircases. She heard the conversation and decided to step back a little to give them their privacy, but she could still hear them.

"You were never anything but my Queen Clarisse. You were the woman I hoped to end my days with." He said.

"But I..." She began, taking Joseph's arm.

"But yes. If you prefer that I consider you first and foremost as my Queen, I would understand." Joseph cut her off.

"No, Joseph." She began, cupping his cheek.

"Your Majesty." He interrupted her.

They stood there in silence for a few seconds, staring at each other, then Joseph left the room, leaving Clarisse alone in the middle of the room, visibly sad. She turned off the music, then Charlotte came back.

"Your Majesty..." Charlotte began.

"Will you leave me alone?" Clarisse abruptly said.

The Queen took a breath, then calmed down.

"I'm sorry Charlotte, I think I'm a little tired. I'll go upstairs after me." Clarisse apologized.

Later, Joseph was sitting in the armchair in his room, drinking his third glass of scotch in a row. He was visibly depressed. Clarisse had refused his marriage proposal. Their time had finally come, and she had refused anyway. He finished his drink, poured himself another one, then sat down at his desk to write a letter. He couldn't stay here any longer, it hurt too much. He had given several years of loyal service to the crown, now it was time to think about him. It was time for him to retire. After writing his letter, he wiped the tears from his eyes, then headed to the security room. He saw on the screens that Clarisse was in the kitchen with the Mia's maids. They looked like they were dancing for the Queen. He arched an eyebrow, then left the room. He went up to the Queen's suite and placed his resignation letter on her desk. He then returned to his room.

Upon entering her suite, Clarisse went to her desk to get her reading glasses. He saw Joseph's letter. She recognized his handwriting on the envelope. She took it and opened it, fearful of the contents.

Your Majesty,

I have truly enjoyed the 14 years I have spent serving the royal crown of Genovia. But I believe it is time for me to think about retirement. I know it is a bit hasty, but I want to think about myself and enjoy life while I can. I want to be able to enjoy my family and the loved ones I have left. That is why I am considering returning to Spain.

Agent Shades will be able to replace me adequately, I believe it is time for me to pass the torch to him. My resignation will be effective the day after the Princess' coronation. A change of reign seems like a good time for renewal.

Your Majesty, I want to thank you for everything. It has been a real pleasure to be at your service. I wish you and the entire Renaldi family the best for the future.

Joseph.

Clarisse put down the letter, took off her reading glasses and let the tears flow freely down her face. She felt her knees shake, she had to sit down. She began to cry freely. She couldn't believe that Joseph was leaving. Her world was falling apart, her heart was breaking. Her duty had never weighed so heavily on her. The crown had never taken away so much in his entire life. The crown had never disgusted him so much in his entire life.

Clarisse spent almost an hour crying alone at her desk before pulling herself together. She got ready for bed. Once in bed, she thought about Joseph again and then cried again. She spent part of the night crying curled up in her bed, in the darkness.

The next morning, Clarisse woke up early. She felt lonely and sad. She decided to go see Mia. She suspected that she must still be sleeping, but she needed to see her granddaughter. When she arrived in Mia's suite, she discovered that it was Lily who was sleeping in the Princess's bed. Finally Mia arrived and seemed troubled and sad. Charlotte arrived in the room too, and put the news channel on the TV. Clarisse definitely had something to take her mind off things today.

Later in the morning, Clarisse had sent a summons to Joseph. She was sitting on one of the armchairs in her suite and waiting for him to arrive. Quickly, he entered the room.

"You wanted to see me, Your Majesty." He said as he entered.

"Yes, sit down, Joseph." She said, pointing to the armchair next to her.

The guards at the entrance to the suite closed the double doors, for their privacy. Clarisse remained silent.

"Um, so..." Joseph began, but was interrupted by Clarisse who motioned for him to wait a minute.

They heard the click of the cameras that had just turned off.

"I read your letter last night." She said, pointing to the letter on the small table next to them.

"I suspected that was why the summons." Joseph smiled shyly.

"Of course. Can you explain?" Clarisse asked.

"There is nothing more to say than what is written in the letter, Your Majesty. I am simply retiring." He said calmly.

"So it's true, you are really going to leave?" Clarisse asked.

"I had planned to retire after the coronation for a while. It is true that I had not planned to take it alone, it will change my plans a little, but it does not change this letter." Joseph explained.

"Joseph, you cannot leave, please do not do this." She said, making a light contact on his knee to emphasize her request.

"Your Majesty, I cannot stay here. It is too difficult." He replied, stopping himself from letting a tear escape.

"Joseph, please stay. Don't leave me like this." She said, feeling tears welling up in her eyes.

"I am truly sorry, Your Majesty. It is better this way. You have made your choice. Please excuse me." He said, getting up and leaving the room.

Clarisse remained there, motionless. Tears were now flowing freely down her face.

Joseph quickly headed to his room. He needed to pull himself together. He entered the room, closed the door, leaned against the door and then cried freely. He was completely broken. He couldn't remember ever having been in this much pain in his life. He felt his phone vibrate. He picked it up and saw that his sister Angelina was calling him. He rejected the call and put the phone back in his pocket. He took a breath to try to pull himself together, but to no avail. He heard the phone ring again. He picked it up and answered it.

"What?" Joseph asked curtly.

"Um, hi Joe. Are you okay?" Angelina asked.

"When I don't answer it's because I'm busy Angelina." He simply said.

"Joseph, are you okay?" she asked in a worried voice.

Joseph didn't answer, he just cried.

"Joseph? Joseph what's going on?" she asked.

"I. I um. I'm going back to Spain next week." he said simply.

"Um ok, um how long?" she asked uncertainly.

"A long time." he said.

"What's going on Joe, you're worrying me big brother." she said.

"She turned down my marriage proposal." he answered simply, feeling the tears rolling down his cheeks even more.

"Oh no. Is it final?" she asked.

"I don't know." he answered in a whisper.

"Joe, that woman loves you, I know it and you know it too. You're blinded by sadness and that's normal, but maybe you should talk to her about it before you make a decision on impulse."

"The Princess will be crowned next week Angelina. Our time had finally come, but she chose her duty. Despite the fact that she's finally free, she chose her duty. It's over Angelina, it's over." Joseph cried.

"Maybe she's afraid to make an official commitment." Angelina suggested.

"No, it's not fear. She wants to devote all her time to the crown to help the Princess once she's crowned queen." Joseph said.

"And that stops her from marrying you?" She asked.

"In her eyes yes." He said.

"She's been used to putting her duty before herself her whole life, but she loves you Joseph. And you love her too." Angelina said.

"I know that, but I can't force her to marry Angelina." Joseph said simply.

"I know that." She said.

"Well listen, I have to go, but I'll keep you informed of my arrival. I handed in my resignation and it's effective after the coronation next week." Joseph said.

"Okay, call me whenever you want okay?" She said.

"Yes okay, thanks little sister." Joseph said before cutting the line.

He put his phone in his pocket, wiped his tears, took a deep breath and then returned to his post in the security room.

The next day Joseph had put Shades in charge of the queen's security. He preferred to avoid him. He had spent the day in the security room. He looked rather grumpy and his colleagues had all noticed it.

June 25, 2006

The morning of the wedding, Joseph was on duty in the security room. He looked at the time on the clock and noticed that it was the time Clarisse was going out with Maurice to the palace gardens. He got up and walked to one of the balconies on the upper floor of the palace. He could see all the gardens from his vantage point. He saw Clarisse and Maurice. The dog was running and playing, Clarisse was walking behind him. He was just looking at her. There was obvious sadness on his face. He felt tears welling up in his eyes, so he decided to go back to his duty.

Meanwhile, Mia was hiding in a hallway, listening to a conversation between two maids, which she had unwittingly intercepted.

"The Queen has refused Joe's marriage proposal. You should see him, he is so devastated. I heard him crying yesterday. He was heading to his room. »

"So that's why he resigned. I thought it was because the Queen agreed and they were going to leave together or something."

"Unfortunately not. Even if she had, she wouldn't have left anyway, leaving the Princess to fend for herself."

"Of course. Oh, I think it's such a shame."

"When the Queen read Joe's resignation letter, she was said to have spent most of the night crying. Olivia heard her."

"Their story can't end like this. Do you know why the Queen refused Joe's marriage proposal?"

"First of all, that damn marriage law that applies to Queens. And she still puts her duty before herself."

"So it's true, Joe is really retiring?"

"Yeah. After the coronation." »

Mia had her hand over her mouth, stunned by what was happening. She hadn't seen any of this. Her Grandmother was particularly good at hiding her feelings, even when she was sad. She made the decision to get involved. After the wedding, she would find a solution.