The White Darkness

By Helbaworshipper

The Roland Kingdom Arc: The One Left Behind

Alice woke up in what felt a strange state. The last thing she remembered was Kyo's talk with her. There had been a battle going on and… She blinked, feeling warmer than before. It felt comfortable, as if she had been in this sort of embrace before. Perhaps even before, but now it felt oddly distant to her as to why she thought before.

"I know he chose a Rose Garden, but it sure is kind of bad to have a bed out here." A voice she recognized. She hadn't seen him in some time, but it felt right. He was always so simple, yet… He felt like he'd do anything he wanted. She could see the mirror only lightly glowing as her head raised a little further to meet Frei's gaze. "You must be exhausted."

"Am I still in?"

"Yeah," he was holding her in the way her parents slept sometimes. Her parents would often sleep without holding each other. Other times she'd see them sometimes holding each other. It was a comfortable looking position. Before Mayura went to war, they'd sneak in as young children and sometimes just seek to be right near them.

"I… will I be-"

"No talk about that." Frei's voice was firm, but calm as he moved his gaze to follow hers. "I've been through a lot during these months. And while it is true that we did interact, I did have a bit of a selfish thought we were some sort of inseparable goal." He started to sit up, allowing her to do so. "What I want isn't much, but I want to be sure. You know that if you don't choose Kyo, the power goes away. This world functions without Lotis or Maram."

"Yes," she spoke to confirm his second part.

"I don't care about if I have Lotis, Alice." She was a bit surprised at his statement. "Originally, meeting you as Lotsuan made me feel happy because I was so lonely. The fact that you couldn't remember was fine to me. I want you to choose me because that's what you want. Not about how bad it'll be out there or if people will curse you for not keeping the power going. No matter what choice you make, it won't change the love I have for you."

"I thought it was simply for political reasons?" She blinked, a bit more surprised than she thought she'd be. Frei didn't seem the type of guy to fall in love. In fact, she hadn't really had reason to think he would.

"I don't know how politics really goes with this." He looked more tired of the word than her question. "I want all of you, Alice. It's not as simple as I have a reason. I have so many reasons I couldn't remember them all. I'll accept all of you. Lotsuan's memories, Darva's memories, and even the memories of things you feel hurt speaking of. Give me a chance and if I really can't… Then you can try it out with Wakamiya." He seemed a little put out.

"Duking it out with Kyo," she laughed and for the first time a part of her felt the wave of emotions truly impact her. "You know I… When I'm with you… I can do anything I want. Even if it's not happy." She smiled as tears began to flow. "I don't even know what word that means..." She began to sob as she felt his arms around her again.

"I think I know the word." he simply stated as the sheer amount of emotions kept her holding tight to his shirt. The one who had truly needed to escape and let go of all this pain was gone, and what was left had to deal with the aftermath of something far too large for a single person to deal with.

Kyo felt his power leaving as Frei stood up. Not that he had thought Frei would lose, but perhaps a part of him had hoped. The two of them simply exchanged glances as he carried a sleeping Alice out of the church. The two of them had a lot to figure out along with the whole loss of power.

The next time Alice woke up, was surprisingly in Weilhausen Kingdom. Considering the mess of the war, it wasn't that much of a surprise. Still, a part of her felt pain every time she moved. It might have been a symptom of how much power and strain on the body. She slowly turned to see a familiar head. It was blonde, but it looked as if it hadn't been taken care of in some time.

"Mayura?" She spoke, causing the head to move. It really was her sister. It took her by surprise how easily the said person hugged her.

"Thank Lotsuan you're okay!" Her voice was slightly cracked. "You've been asleep for weeks."

"Weeks?" She looked a bit confused at the thought of it. "I… I can't remember that."

"Frei said it was a lot of things. Most likely just the sheer amount of power in your body along with the mental strain." She felt the warmth in her sister's embrace. "Though without the power, well, we're still figuring out a lot." She held her sister back slowly, trying to enjoy the feel.

"Am I going to be..."

"Of course not." She heard her mother's voice for the first time in awhile. "You're silly to think that we'd punish you for something far more complicated. If anything, it was your will that saved a lot more people than you think." It was a bit confusing for her as she felt her mother take one of her hands in both. "Thanks to your actions during this time, only Lotis masters and Maram Masters got the worst of it. You may not be aware of it, but your desire to keep the war between the powers, rather than taking innocent civilians was actually felt by everyone. And even if we should be blaming you, what sort of punishment do you give to a power that no longer exists?" Her mother's smile grew a bit. She nodded to Mayura as the position remained. "Thank you for coming back, Alice."

She could feel the warmth even if the Lotis wasn't there. She didn't have words as Mayura returned with a light meal to help her get better. She could barely keep herself awake it seemed. Perhaps it was the sheer comfort after everything she'd been through.

It took a few more months for her body to truly recover enough to move around outside the room. She was slowly being allowed to interact with the outside thanks to the mess the war had caused. She knew it wasn't her fault entirely, but she knew she had her own part to play in it. However, if she even remotely tried to do something to apologize, Frei would give a look of question to her. Even now as they walked through the remains of the former Lotis garden. She felt awkward being pushed around as she had already felt her legs give out earlier.

"Are you not attending the conference today?" She asked, slightly adjusting the blanket over her shoulders. He had insisted it was still a bit cold today.

"I already told my father I'm not inheriting this place." He answered with a calm tone. "I want to do more than be a political decider, you know."

"Our engagement is still staying?"

"Even if we're commoners." He looked towards her with his relaxed smile. "They'll figure out the whole mess on their own. Not as if I can do much other than use a weapon now. Perhaps a general if I feel like trying to do some battle."

"You're talking about it so casually." A chuckle left her lips as she felt herself relax again. Over time, the memories were starting to disappear. A part of her was upset at it, but then she realized that it wasn't really that bad. Everything she had learned about Lotsuan itself was not even correct from his perspective. So much more had been going on. "You know… I'd like to go around and figure what I can even do."

"Whatever you want," she blinked, a bit surprised as she realized he was in front of her. "Alice, we'll do whatever you want. I don't care if we're poor farmers or wandering around forever." She felt her cheeks heat up as he looked at her. "I'm going to prove how much I love you, even if it takes my whole life." She didn't know who started, but at some point their lips touched. Perhaps, even now, she had a lot more to think about.

Note: There will be a series of Epilogues leading to an ending. This is the end of the main story.