INTRO
Zero Kiryu stood and looked at the small white cottage in front of him. He took a deep breath, biding his time to really consider his next move. He'd been out here longer than he'd ever admit. He couldn't pinpoint it precisely but something deep in his gut told him that if he did decide to knock on that door, it could mean some serious changes in his life. Possibly something that he could never go back from.
His natural instincts warned him that he needed to be cautious about his next steps. At the same time they also seemed to hint at the slight possibility that those potential changes might not necessarily be bad- at the possibility that a slight shake-up in his life just might mean something good yet to come. As things currently stood, Zero could definitely use a stroke of positivity in his life right now.
He took a moment to reflect on the last few months of his life, sighing in exhaustion as he thought about it. Everything had changed for him once Yuki had been revealed as a pure blood vampire and had made the choice to leave with her brother Kaname and the rest of the Night Class students. A part of Zero still ached and hurt whenever he thought about the choice she had made for herself even despite knowing how Zero felt about her.
After she had left, the Night School campus closed and since then only Day School classes were still held. Zero was still attending Cross Academy as a student but he'd been taking on more and more missions as a Vampire Hunter. Lately he'd been doing most of those missions with a partner- Rei Shihoin an old colleague from back in his training days with the Association. Zero ran his fingers stiffly through his hair. Rei was the reason he was here today, anxiously stirring outside of this cottage, nervously plotting his next steps.
Rei had been a good friend to him. Things had been rocky between them when they had trained together many years ago, but since partnering recently they had become really close. Like really close. When it had been revealed that Rido hadn't actually been destroyed, and it was believed that instead of dying he was still out there gathering his energy and preparing for his next strike- it had been Rei that had helped comfort Zero when he got down on his self for his failure. Rei had also been the one that had urged Zero to mend his relationship with Yuki. Angered by her leaving and the betrayal he'd felt after learning she was a vampire, Zero had sworn to hunt Yuki down, but Rei had talked him through that and off the ledge, urging him instead to erase his foolish vendetta and recant on that oath that had been eating him alive.
In truth, between their shared history, and the ease of communication and understanding between them, Rei had become his closest friend and was nothing less than invaluable to Zero. But recently… Zero bristled with anger as he thought back to their encounter with Kaname during Zero's recent attempt to reconcile with Yuki. Things had gone badly when Kaname interfered, and Rei had to intervene. She'd stepped in and then….
Zero shook his head brusquely. He didn't want to relive that moment again. It had been painful and it had uncovered a lot of truths that might not have otherwise come to light. He groaned inwardly. The bottom line was that after that encounter, he now knew that Rei was in love with him, and he was left to decide what to do with an intense expression of feelings from someone dear to him. Feelings that he couldn't possibly return.
Zero's love for Yuki had caused him immeasurable suffering and he still hadn't managed to fully deal with it yet. As his friend, Rei was fully aware of it and had always been supportive. Zero worried that this newly uncovered revelation would now ruin the one healthy relationship that he had in his life. He had already been miserable over Yuki for months and now he didn't know how to handle Rei either. It had caused him to be consumed by additional anxiety for the past couple of days. Immediately after the incident, Rei had taken time off from the Hunter's Association and vanished. She'd been completely unreachable for the last couple of days and no one at all had heard from her until just today- when Zero received a message with coordinates asking him to come meet her. Alone.
He was here now. But still…the sense of worry told him meeting with her was going to be heavy and that he wasn't at all ready for it. He could always turn back. He could tell Kaien where she was, send him to fetch her, and stay out of it himself. But he knew there was no way he would do that. He really did care for her and he would never betray her like that.
So he guessed that was his answer then. Like it or not, he was going to the cottage and he'd listen to what she had to say. Even if he couldn't return her feelings, he could still work to be as good of a friend to her as she'd been to him.
Zero squared back his shoulders and walked purposefully to the front door of the cottage. He knocked firmly on the door and then waited…
CHAPTER 1
"Zero, you know how I feel. I think I made it pretty clear that day. But I'm also very much aware of where your heart lies. I'm not disillusioned about that, and as much as I might wish it could be so, I don't harbor any fantasy that it will ever be any other way. However that doesn't mean that maybe tonight for one night only… maybe we can still find comfort in one another? Even if you're not mine, just to be with you even for a bit would give me some joy. And to be able to comfort you even for a night would make me even happier." Rei paused only briefly, not wanting to lose momentum on the proposal she was determined to put on the table tonight.
Zero stood there numb. He wasn't certain exactly what he'd been expecting but this hadn't been it. Almost as soon as he had entered the cabin, Rei had hit him with this. Not one to mince words, as soon as he'd come in and closed the door behind him, she''d wasted almost no time both confirming her feelings and almost simultaneously throwing this absurd proposal at his feet. While 'meek' would never be an adjective that anyone would use to describe her, he had to admit that this was a little aggressive even for Rei. He hadn't seen it coming and he was struggling to digest it all, even now.
"It would be a single night where you could put her out of your mind. Maybe you could finally even sleep for a night? I know that you don't. A night of rest, a night without troubles weighing you down, and a night with someone who loves you, unashamedly. I do want to give that to you. If it's something that you'd also want to have?" Rei looked up at Zero, trying to gauge his expression. Was this too forward? She meant it, but she could see how it could be too strong, and knowing Zero, her guess was that he was currently more worried about toying with her feelings and hurting her. She didn't share those worries. She was a big girl and she was very clear on where Zero's feelings stood and who they stood with.
Zero looked uncertain- torn in his thoughts. Had this actually been what she'd retreated into seclusion for? Simply to prepare to physically offer herself up to him? No, that couldn't be it… He was obviously giving himself too much credit. When it came to Rei, there was really no telling, getting inside her head was next to impossible.
Tilting towards him, Rei placed her palm gently on his cheek. "Tell me your concerns. Let's talk about it?"
Zero blinked down at her and then moved to the chair in the corner and sat down in exhaustion. He placed his head between his hands and sighed.
"This can't be a good idea…" He looked up at Rei. "We've worked together for so long. We are friends aren't we? This would ruin that…" Zero looked away. Again, he hadn't been sure what to expect when he'd met Rei here, but this suggestion of hers definitely wasn't it.
Rei stepped near him. "Honestly, I don't think it ruins things any more than me admitting to you that I'm in love with you does." Zero's head snapped back towards her.
"Did that ruin it? Honestly? Would you never want to work by my side again now that you know how I feel?" Rei asked. She tried not to let it show, but worry ran its way across her face. Zero stood up again and placed his hands on her shoulders pulling her to him.
"No," he spoke into the top of her head, "Of course not. If you can still stomach working with me, I wouldn't want to partner with anyone else." He peered down at her and gave her a small smile. "Still…" His smile wavered, "It does feel awful that I just can't return those feelings. I don't ever want to hurt you Rei".
This time Rei smiled at him. "I know you don't Zero. Maybe it's one of the things that I love about you. But still, don't worry about me. You can't help who you love and it's the same for me." Her eyes bore into his and they were clear and steady. " I know it can't be returned, but I can't change how I feel. Now that its all out in the open I'm not going to shy away from it anymore- I don't see the point. I just want you happy, and I think this could do it, even if just for the night." Rei looked down, an uncharacteristic blush creeping into her cheeks, "If I'm being completely honest, it would of course benefit me as well…"
Zero brushed the back of his hand tenderly across a red cheek as he carefully studied her, his brow furrowed in concern. "What could you possibly get out of this? I…feel like it would leave you feeling worse?" Rei shook her head adamantly. "It won't. I get to savor the feel of your arms and your body and the closeness of you. At the same time, I get the pleasure of bringing you joy and comfort. It's something that's crossed my mind before, but I'm ready to act on it now. Sure it's only temporary, but it's something. The only thing I'd ask of you is that for the night you have to see me as only me"
Zero frowned "What do you mean 'only you'?" Rei straightened up and looked Zero directly in his eyes.
"I don't want to be a substitute for 'her'. When you're with me I want to be seen as 'Rei'. I want you to recognize that its me that you're with and I'm not just a placeholder for the person that you can't be with right now. It's my only request."
She searched his eyes, it was a single request, but maybe too big of one for this man who pretty much revolved around Yuki. Could he lay next to her without envisioning Yuki? The thought of him saying her name as he lay with Rei gave her a nauseating feeling. Strange as it might be, it was the one thing about this entire prospect that would truly make her feel awful. Putting this out there was hard enough as it was, but if he couldn't give her that, then her self-respect wouldn't allow her to move forward with this. Time paused as she waited with bated breath, head tilted, needing the answer to drop from his lips.
Zero hesitated for only a moment. "That's not a difficult request. I always see you Rei. I love…'her' and there is no substitute for her, but also when I'm with you, I can only see you as you are. There will never be any chance of me seeing you as anyone except the person that you are, no matter what the situation is." Zero gave her a small grin and lightly pinched the side of her face.
Rei released the breath that she had been holding and allowed the excitement that she had been holding in to finally release itself. Cautiously she snaked her hands around the back of Zero's neck, never breaking eye contact with him. Raising up on her toes, she lightly pulled him down towards her. She felt just a slight resistance, but keeping her gaze on him she used her eyes to once again reassure him that this would be fine. It would be okay.
As Zero leaned down, Rei softly placed her lips on his. She moved a hand to softly caress his face as she pressed her lips against his, opening them slightly and gently running her tongue just along the inside of his mouth, allowing herself to taste him. "Just for tonight" she murmured as she pulled back, holding his hands and pulling him towards her and the bed.
*0*0*0*
The night was long. Undressing Zero was sensual for Rei and she took her time to enjoy it- slowly running her fingers over the hard lines of his body. She reminded him only at the beginning that tonight was only about them, and his mind was only to focus on her and the acts between them. Zero seemed worried at first, but as she gave him this reminder, his eyes locked with hers and he nodded, wrapped his arms around her, and from that moment on, devoted his full attention to her and her body.
His kisses were sweet. Everything Rei had hoped they would be- the feel of him at her throat was ecstasy, and his hands and his mouth as they traced the lines and curves of her body were memories that she was determined to never let go of. Just prior to the intertwining of their bodies Zero paused, and in the only time that he broke out of the rhythm that night, he looked at Rei and asked earnestly "are you absolutely sure about this?" Rei smiled, kissed him softly on his lips and the reply was easy,
"More sure than anything"
She expected that her first time would be painful. However, maybe it was her feelings for Zero or maybe it was Zero's tenderness with her, but she felt no pain, just intense pleasure and fullness. There were small moments of sadness as she realized this would be a one-time only encounter, but she was determined to only focus on the moment and to live fully in it. She made eye contact with Zero as often as she could and was pleasantly happy to find that he held it and seemed to move with only Rei in his eyes and on his mind. As their pace quickened, she could hear Zero groan as he buried his head in her shoulder. As he made eye contact again, she could see his eyes shifting from their soft grey color to the deep red of transformation. Her body also seemed to be calling for something from him. She tried to sort her thoughts but couldn't get them straight. What was she thinking? Why? Was her body expressing some carnal need that her brain couldn't comprehend? She arched her back as Zero again kissed into her neck… and then the words slipped from her mouth. She didn't plan them. She barely recalled uttering them, but they were definitely her words from her mouth. And once they were out, for some reason she didn't want to recant them….
"Bite me."
Zero's pace stalled, "…What?"
Rei kept moving, "Don't stop. You heard me Zero- I want you... All of you" she ran her tongue slickly along the black tattoo on the side of his neck.
"Just do it" she whispered. She could see Zero's eyes cloud over. He was already struggling with animal urges, his baser instincts were in full swing, and if her carnal desires were flaring out of control then she knew his definitely were.
"Haaah…" he groaned into her ear. "Rei, please… don't do this to me… don't say things like that…. I can't … I can't hold back – if… if you say things like that…." He pulled back, his body still moving within her, his eyes pleading, looked deeply into hers. It was that look that cinched it for Rei. She needed him, and at this moment she wanted this above anything else.
"Please, Zero…" she begged. Kissing him deeply, she wrapped her legs tightly around him and pulled him closer, moaning as he moved deeper within her, she tilted her head and exposed her neck as much as she could. Zero let out a low guttural groan, and Rei's moans became a loud cry as Zero gently sunk his fangs into the soft flesh of her neck, the pace of their bodies slowed, but Rei immediately found comfort in the new rhythm.
Zero leaned his forearm near the side of Rei's head as he drank from the other side of her neck, he carefully wrapped his other arm around Rei's lower back so that he could continue to hold her body as he moved inside her. The feeling was indescribable. He had never drank from anyone except Yuki, so it was already a different experience, but he had never physically shared his body with anyone at all, so that experience was entirely new as well. Combining the two was overwhelming for him.
He could smell the scent of Rei and hear her soft breathing and low moans beneath him. He found his heart beating harder as she squirmed and reacted as they moved together. Trying to come down from the euphoria, Zero knew that he was was getting close to drinking too much and it was time to stop, but he just couldn't get enough. As he absorbed himself in all of the different senses of Rei, he absently picked up his pace. Her responses egged him on further, and hearing the noises she made was becoming more than he could take.
He had gone into this encounter feeling unsure, but right now all he could think about was Rei, and he wanted both more and all of her- it just wasn't enough. With a loud sigh he removed his fangs from her neck, taking his tongue and running it along her nape to collect the blood dribbling from the mark. Rei shuddered beneath him as he did this, and it sent him over the edge. He kissed her on her mouth, letting his blood-stained tongue explore her willing mouth as he pushed deeper and faster into her shaking body, releasing deeply inside of her before finally collapsing gently on top of his new lover's body.
Rei lay quietly in the afterglow of her encounter with Zero. She was trying to catch her breath, but her body had a hard time catching up. Her body still seemed to be having mini tremors and she was terrified to move because the feel of his lean, muscular body on top of hers was comforting and she didn't want him to move away. Rei looked down at the mop of Silver grey hair that lay on her chest. She couldn't help but stroke it. Yeah, she loved him, there could be no denying it at this point. At that moment though, she couldn't help but feel violently jealous of Yuki. For just an instant, Rei thought that for the love of this man there might not be anything in the world that she wouldn't be willing to give up. The thought was fleeting and it passed almost as quickly as it came, but even still she found herself shaken by the intensity of it, and massively relieved once it had gone.
She loved Zero and Zero loved someone else. So was the way of the world. She'd make her own happiness as she could, and do what she could to make him happy as well. She only hoped that tonight would give him even a bit of the happiness that it had given her. As these thoughts ran through her head she became acutely aware of the shallow breathing coming from Zero's limp form. She paused, 'wait is he-?' She listened harder. 'He's asleep!' A smile formed on Rei's lips. So maybe tonight he would finally get some sleep. She was glad for that. Content, she closed her eyes and focused on the warmth of the body laying on hers.
*0*0*0*
Zero opened his eyes and peered around trying to assess his location. He was covered in long threads with something warm pressed firmly against him? He blinked and looked down as it all began coming back to him. He was at Rei's place, where she was hiding out. He looked in wonder at the sleeping form cradled against him. It was her long black hair, loose from it's bindings and spilled out everywhere, that was covering him and the bed.
Rei looked so innocent and so vulnerable. He knew he wasn't supposed to but he couldn't help staring at her as she slept. Rei was so tough, he'd never met a woman like her before. She was fearless. He had never seen her backdown or scared of anything. That is up until the other day. While she hadn't flinched at all regarding her own life, it was the threat made on Zero's life that had ultimately sent Rei into a panic. That was the first time Zero had ever seen fear cross her face and it had been startling. He frowned at the memory. That terrified look on her face…of course it would have to have been because of him… The innocent expression on her face as she slept now was almost as vulnerable, but in a much softer way. The fearful face that day, had made him want to save her- rescue her from her pain. This face now, made him almost just want to protect her- make sure she never knew what pain would look like to begin with. She looked so much younger and softer. Zero chuckled to himself, imagining her angry face if she knew he was thinking that of her. That was Rei's story through. Similar to himself, Rei was a lot harder on the outside than she was inside. Inside she really was quite gentle and kind.
Zero delicately pulled the hair that had draped over Rei's face and slid it back over her shoulder. As he did he noticed the traces of the bite mark on her neck, and he lightly ran his fingers over it. 'I wonder what got into her to ask for that? It was unexpected..'. He really hoped that she didn't change her mind and regret this. He didn't. It had been more of a night than he bargained for but he didn't regret a moment of it, and he was glad that it had been with Rei. He glanced over at the clock and then raised his eyebrows in shock. He had been sleep for the last 4 hours. That was already more sleep than he had gotten in a single night within the past few weeks. Truth be told, he felt like right now if he were to snuggle down next to her he could easily fall back asleep again. However… as he looked at the outline of her sleeping form and remembered the feel of her skin on his, he felt himself begin to stir. The agreement was just one night, but didn't this still count as the same night? He didn't like the idea of waking her up as she slept so peacefully, but if this was going to be the only night… Slightly conflicted, he lowered his lips to her sleeping face and lightly kissed her lips. Rei stirred, and hesitantly Zero took his hand and traced the curve of her waist and hip. Rei's eyes slowly blinked open and eventually found his. A bit embarrassed, Zero gave her a small shrug, but before he could say anything, Rei smiled, took his hand and gently tugged him down to the bed. As he fell into her arms, Zero closed his eyes and hoped that this night might last just a bit longer than normal.
*0*0*0*
When he woke this time, Zero found Rei curled up in his arms. She was warm and comfortable and it pained him to have to move but he knew that now it was time to go. The night had been long for both of them, but another 7 hours had passed since their last round. He couldn't even remember the last time he'd gotten that much sleep. He felt rejuvenated in a way he hadn't expected. He smiled down at Rei. 'She really was right. It was a perfect night of forgetting, and I feel better than I have in a long time'. His smile dropped. 'But I have to go. I can't stay here. If I keep looking at her, I'll want to stay and this will become more than a one-night deal. I can't do that to her. I've got to go now before I try to convince myself that this set-up could somehow work as something different…' Zero shook his head and slowly disengaged himself from Rei's embrace. 'She deserves so much more'.
As he stood and quietly dressed himself, Zero took one more look at Rei's lithe frame in the bed in front of him. He knew he shouldn't but he wanted at least one mental picture to remember her in this light. This had been a beautiful night and even if they would never speak of it again, he didn't ever want to forget it or the beauty of her in this moment. As he thought about it, this was the first time he'd ever seen her hair down. As long as he'd known her she'd always worn it tightly pinned up. It was so long and thick, no wonder he hadn't known what he was covered with when he woke up earlier. It draped over her body and all over the bed, but it was luxurious and suited her so well. The only thing that made Zero a bit sad was that he couldn't also see her lovely amethyst eyes to complete this picture. Oh well, this would have to do. He wanted to kiss her one final time but couldn't risk waking her. "Thank you so much Rei. You are amazing and you were absolutely right. I owe you so much". He quickly turned and walked out the door, harboring every expectation that he would see her again soon.
