I want you to want me…
Chapters of Trust
by
Ava LeBeau
Fourteen
Ana stood in line at the food truck, her phone pressed to her ear as she spoke with Hannah. The enticing aroma of grilled meats and spices filled the air, but her focus was entirely on the conversation.
"…and honestly, if he keeps being so ambiguous, I might have to start charging him for all this mental space he's occupying," she said with a wry smile.
"So Grey's still playing his notorious games, huh?" Hannah replied knowingly. "You'd think he'd realize that's not a sustainable strategy. But hey, I know exactly how you feel. I mean, welcome to the Year of the Trust Fund Guys… At this rate, I should probably start practicing my 'Oh wow, you have a private jet?' face for when Jack invites me on his next spontaneous getaway."
"Mhmm," Ana said. Just then, she caught sight of Christian approaching, exuding his usual effortless charm as he casually slid his hand into his jacket pocket. Anastasia felt a rush of anticipation mixed with nerves.
"Hold on a sec," she said quickly, lowering her voice as if it would somehow shield her from his imposing and unnervingly magnetic presence. "Gotta go… He's here," she said, staring at Grey.
"Alright, but don't let him distract you too much," Hannah warned. "You've got this, girl."
"Thanks for the vote of confidence," Anastasia replied dryly. "I'll call you back later…assuming I don't lose my train of thought the moment he opens his mouth."
With that, she ended the call and took a deep breath, bracing herself for whatever Grey was about to throw her way.
Christian checked his watch with a confident glance as he approached the food truck, the vibrant colors of the menu contrasting sharply with his polished demeanor. He spotted Anastasia standing in line, on the phone, her laughter ringing out like music amidst the bustling crowd. She turned to greet him, her smile brightening the overcast day. But it was those ocean blue eyes that mesmerized him, and he was positive that he could lose himself in them.
"Look who finally decided to show up," she teased. "Did you get lost on your way from your corner office?"
When he reached her, Christian wrapped her in a brief side hug, his cheek lightly brushing against hers. He felt a rush of warmth at the sweet touch, it was soft and fleeting but spoke volumes more than words ever could.
Straightening up with a confident smile, towering over her, all tall and athletic, he laughed huskily. "Traffic was brutal," he said, well aware that it was really about cutting the business lunch short. "But I wouldn't miss this for the world," he looked around, glancing at the other customers who stood way too close for his liking.
"You look amazing."
Anastasia felt her cheeks flush slightly but quickly masked it with a cheeky grin. "Thanks. I figured I should dress up for my favorite player."
Christian raised an eyebrow, feigning innocence. "Player? Me? I'm just here for a quick lunch and some meaningful conversation."
"Right," she replied, crossing her arms playfully. "And I'm sure you have a whole line of admirers waiting just around the corner."
He leaned in, looking into her eyes. "Only one admirer matters right now," he said, his gray gaze so intense.
Ana's heart raced at the closeness but she fought to keep her composure. "Flattery will get you nowhere, Mr. Grey," she mumbled, trying to maintain some distance despite how much she wanted to lean in.
"Is that so?" Christian grinned but Anastasia only bit her lip and shrugged nonchalantly.
As they moved forward in the line, Christian glanced at the menu, trying to mask his reluctance. "So, what's good here?" he asked, feigning enthusiasm.
"I really think we should try the tacos. José says they're amazing… but I'm also tempted by the burritos," Anastasia beamed at him, her excitement infectious. "What do you think?"
Christian tilted his head ever so slightly. "Tacos? Really?" He smirked, but there was a hint of mischief in his tone.
"Oh, come on. Just this once? Or are you worried it might ruin your perfectly curated meal plan?" she teased, leaning closer with a conspiratorial grin.
"It might, actually."
"What?"
"Ruin my macros."
Anastasia groaned and rolled her eyes. "Seriously? You're not telling me that your trainer's going to kick your butt for having a cheat day?"
"Actually, I am. Claude's tracking all my meals."
"Who's Claude?"
"My personal trainer."
"Ooh, fancy. Hope he doesn't catch wind of that chocolate cake last night… you could be in for some extra burpees next session," Anastasia bit her lip, and Christian's steel-gray gaze darted to her mouth. He wondered if she knew what that little gesture did to him; he was sure she wasn't even aware.
"Maybe," Christian grinned, and with a dramatic sigh that was more for show than anything else, he relented. "Alright, let's go with your recommendation then. But you know I'm terrible at making decisions when it comes to food. You seem like the expert here, so please take charge," he suggested with a playful smirk, his hand coming to rest against the small of her back as he gently pushed her toward the counter.
"Tacos then?" Ana glanced at him.
"Why not both? We could share and make it a feast."
"Now you're talking," she laughed, her eyes sparkling with excitement.
As Anastasia placed their order with confidence, she shot him a teasing look. "You know, if you keep avoiding fun food like this, you might just turn into one of those health nuts who only eats kale."
"Hey now," he said with mock indignation. "Kale has its merits, Ana."
They both laughed and while Anastasia chatted animatedly with the vendor about favorite dishes, Christian couldn't help but admire how effortlessly she brought a radiant positivity to everyone around her.
When it came time to pay, he stepped forward, reaching into his pocket for some cash. "Let me get this."
"Thank you; you don't have to do that," Anastasia protested lightly, though there was a hint of surprise in her voice as she reached for his wrist.
"I insist," he replied confidently, glancing down at her hand on his cuff. "Consider it my treat for letting you down last night."
He handed over the bills and received their food in return.
"You really didn't have to, but I appreciate it," she said, her tone softening as they stepped away from the truck.
Christian shrugged. "It's just lunch. I'm happy to do it. So, do you want to eat them here or take them somewhere?"
Ana glanced at her watch and sighed lightly. "I really should get back to the bookshop. I have some things to finish up."
"Let me walk you there," Christian offered without hesitation, making her smile.
As they walked away from the food truck, side by side but still maintaining a comfortable distance, there was an undeniable energy between them, a mix of easy silence and unspoken curiosity about each other.
Then, all of a sudden, Ana said, "You know what I think? You probably fell asleep during our movie last night because you were dreaming about this cheat day."
Christian furrowed his brow, feigning surprise. "Excuse me? I wasn't asleep. I was just… uhm… resting my eyes."
"Resting your eyes? Right," she chuckled. "I'm pretty sure I heard you snoring."
Christian laughed, shaking his head. "Me? Snoring? No way. I was just… deeply engrossed in the film."
A smirk playing on her lips, Anastasia side-glanced at him. "Engrossed? Is that what you call it when you're drooling on the couch?"
"Hey, I can't help it if the movie was a snooze-fest," he shot back with a grin. "Maybe next time we should pick something with a little more action, like a documentary on paint drying."
"Oh, great idea," she replied sarcastically, rolling her eyes. "Nothing says thrilling like watching paint dry for two hours. I'll bring popcorn, but only if Claude approves, okay?"
"Fine by me."
"Just promise not to fall asleep during the next one."
"Deal," Christian said. "But if I doze off again, it's your fault for picking something boring."
"Just so we're clear… if you fall asleep again," she glanced at him and grinned. "I'm definitely taking a picture and posting it online."
"You wouldn't dare." For a moment, his insides clenched but the uneasy feeling was swiftly eclipsed by haughty confidence.
"Oh, I would absolutely dare," Anastasia said with a laugh. "It'd be too good not to share with the world."
"You're lucky I find your antics mildly entertaining or else I'd have to reconsider this whole lunch thing, Ms. Steele," he said and for a heartbeat his voice was laced with an icy coldness.
"Don't get too cocky," she warned playfully. "I still have my eye on you for that potential snoring incident."
"Fair enough," he replied and that muscle in his jaw began to jump.
They walked in silence before Christian casually asked. "So, what's next on your agenda?"
"I think I'll dive into the new arrivals and spend some time organizing the shelves," Ana said. "You know, to recover from last night's trauma of watching you sleep through an entire movie." She glanced at him and grinned.
"Sounds riveting," he teased back. "But if you change your mind about a coffee later, let me know."
"Tea."
"Tea… of course."
"I just might take you up on that," she said, her tone light but her eyes sparkling with intrigue. "But seriously, I really have some work to do."
As they turned the corner, Anastasia felt a flutter of excitement. The quaint bookshop with its flower boxes brimming with vibrant blooms always felt like home. But as they approached, her brow furrowed when she stepped closer to the door, squinting at the small sign that read "Closed" in bold letters. It was only noon, and José should be there.
Christian noticed her sudden stillness and followed her gaze. She pressed her forehead against the cool glass of the door, peering inside. The shop was dark and silent; not a flicker of movement stirred among the shelves that were usually alive with customers browsing and chatting.
"Hmm, I just don't get why he wouldn't let me know if he was going to be late or something," Ana said, more to herself, fumbling with her keys. Christian's silvery gaze rested on her, a mix of curiosity and vigilance in his eyes. The furrow in her brow deepened as she finally found the right key and slid it into the lock.
"Everything okay?" Christian asked, his hand brushing gently against her elbow, his voice cutting through the stillness between them.
"Yeah, just… a bit surprised," Anastasia forced a smile as she turned the key and heard the satisfying click of the lock.
The dim light of the shop enveloped them, casting long shadows across the wooden floorboards.
"José?" Ana called out, her voice echoing against the shelves lined with books. There was no response.
Christian lingered near the entrance, observing Anastasia as she moved further into the shop. He noticed how her brows knitted together in thought and how she glanced around as if expecting to find José hiding behind one of the towering stacks of novels.
"Maybe he just lost track of time," Christian suggested with a half-shrug, trying to lighten the mood as he walked in her direction, his focus entirely on her rather than the rows of novels around them.
"Mhmm," Anastasia said absentmindedly. "He's usually so reliable," she added, her voice trailing off as she disappeared through a doorway into the back of the shop while Christian placed the paper bags on the checkout desk, the soft crinkle of the packaging breaking the silence that enveloped them.
"So, why didn't you take the limo last night?" He asked casually, thumbing through one of the new arrivals that lay on the counter. "I thought everyone loved being whisked away in style."
"Oh please, I couldn't let you think I'm some kind of gold digger who fancies flashy rides to get attention," Anastasia's voice came from somewhere in the back.
"Right," he said with mock seriousness and grinned. "Because nothing screams 'gold digger' like turning down a private chauffeur service, Ana."
She laughed at that.
"What if it was only about making someone feel special?" Christian turned around to face Anastasia, his heart pounding in his chest.
The bookshop felt like a world apart, a sanctuary brimming with stories and dreams. But in this moment, it was just the two of them, suspended in an electric yet fragile silence.
Christian stepped closer, his platinum gaze locked onto hers. The instant their eyes met, excitement surged through him. Ana's ocean-blue eyes reflected his uncertainty, but beneath that lay something deeper, a flicker of curiosity, maybe even desire. His breath caught as he leaned in slowly, giving her every chance to pull away if she wanted.
But she didn't.
Their lips met softly at first, a gentle brush that sent a shiver down his spine. Christian felt the warmth radiating from her body as he kissed her, savoring the supple softness of her lips against his. It was intoxicating; every nerve ending ignited as he lost himself in the moment. He had imagined this, but nothing compared to the reality of having her so close.
Anastasia's initial hesitation melted away as she leaned into him, her lips brushing against his with a tentative sweetness that made his heart race. Her fingers glided over the stubble of his chiseled jaw, tracing its line before venturing to the soft hair at the nape of his neck. The tenderness of her touch sent shivers through him. A soft moan escaped her lips, igniting a fire deep within him. In that fleeting moment, all their worries and disagreements faded into the background.
It was just them.
A wave of euphoria washed over Christian as he deepened the kiss slightly, savoring her taste, so sweet, so inviting. He wanted to hold onto this feeling forever, how perfectly she fit against him, how their breaths mingled, both exhilarating and terrifying.
But just as quickly as it began, Anastasia pulled back, her eyes wide with surprise and uncertainty. "Oh my God, Christian," she breathed out softly, almost pleadingly. "I—"
"What if I told you I've been thinking about this moment all day?" Grey searched her gaze for any sign of encouragement but found only reluctance etched into her features. "I know this is sudden, Ana," he said gently, trying to keep his voice steady despite the vortex of emotions inside him. "But I can't pretend there's nothing between us."
Her brow furrowed as she looked down for a moment before meeting his gaze again. "Christian," Anastasia said softly, uncertainty lacing her voice. "I— uhm… I'm not sure if this is a good idea."
"Why not?" Christian's jaw tightened and he felt frustration bubbling within him like a storm ready to break but kept it at bay.
Anastasia drew her lip between her teeth for a moment, scanning his features. "It's complicated," she replied hesitantly. "You're my landlord… and you want to bulldoze my bookshop."
Christian frowned but leaned closer again, desperate to bridge the gap between them, both physical and emotional. "Maybe it's time for things to change," he urged gently, searching her eyes for any sign of agreement.
In that charged silence filled with unspoken possibilities and fears, Anastasia felt torn between caution and desire. She could feel the heat radiating from Christian, who still held her close, his presence both comforting and overwhelming. Their kiss had ignited something within her that she'd tried so hard to suppress, but now it flickered like a flame, threatening to consume her.
"I just… I'm not what you need," she said, her voice barely above a whisper. The weight of her words hung heavy in the air, and she could see the disappointment flash across Christian's face. "Not what you want," her voice faded away for good.
"What?" he said incredulously, a crease appearing between his eyebrows. "Ana, you're everything I want. I know that now—"
Before he could finish, Anastasia captured his lips with a soft urgency that surprised even her. Christian returned the kiss, more fervent than before, a silent plea for her to grasp how much he wanted this, how much he wanted her.
Ana's lips moved against his with a hesitant passion that made his skin tingle. For a brief moment, all her reservations seemed to melt away as she surrendered to the kiss.
But then she broke away again, avoiding his platinum gaze for an instant, her eyes drifting to the shelves filled with untold stories. "I need time to think, Christian. To figure things out," she said, there was an uncertainty in her tone that made Christian's chest tighten.
"What if I don't want to wait?" he challenged gently, nudging her nose lightly with his, his eyes darkening as they searched hers for the slightest hint of hope.
Anastasia's breath hitched when she met his gaze once more. There was a flicker of something, an undeniable spark, but it was quickly overshadowed by her caution.
"Sometimes… waiting is the only way to know what we really want, Christian," she said, her voice steady but tinged with vulnerability. Her words, however, were beyond sobering for him.
Christian stepped back just enough to give her space but kept his gaze locked onto hers, a silent promise that there were still things left unsaid.
Anastasia shook her head slightly, trying to regain some semblance of control over the situation.
"Please…" she started, but the words faltered on her lips as she struggled against the pull between them.
Grey wanted to kiss her again; the desire was palpable between them. But when she gently held him back with a delicate hand on his chest, making him wince, he felt a pang of uncertainty creeping in.
"I'm not sure where this is leading us," she admitted quietly, her voice laced with desire but tinged with reluctance all the same.
"Let's not complicate things unnecessarily," Christian said smoothly, his voice low and confident. He held her gaze, feeling the weight of the moment settle between them. He could sense her hesitation, the way she was still grappling with her feelings.
Ana's gaze searched his face for understanding. "I just… I don't want to rush into anything," she said after what felt like an eternity, her words soft but resolute.
"Hey… I get it," Christian faked a smile, disappointment gnawing at him, but his voice remained steady. "I really do," he said, a hint of understanding threading through his words. "You're not ready yet, and that's fine… we can take our time."
There was a part of him that wanted to push further like he normally would, to break down the walls Anastasia Steele had built around herself, but he respected her too much to force it.
Before Ana could respond, the door swung open with a sudden burst, and José strode into the shop, his presence filling the room with an unexpected tension. Christian's posture shifted slightly as he sensed the subtle hostility radiating from José, a protective energy that made it clear this wasn't just a casual encounter.
"Hey, Ana. Sorry I'm late," José called out, his eyes darting between her and Christian with an intensity that didn't go unnoticed. His eyes narrowed as he took in the scene, Ana standing too close to Christian Grey, who was now leaning casually against the counter with an air of confidence that made José bristle.
Christian merely glanced sideways from his position, a slow, deliberate nod acknowledging José's arrival. His expression remained cool and composed, a slight smirk tugging at his lips as if to say he was entirely unfazed by the other man's posturing. Without a word, he turned his attention back to Ana, subtly dismissing José.
The atmosphere thickened with tension; even as he focused on Ana, Christian could feel the challenge radiating from José. Yet he remained unruffled, exuding an effortless dominance that made it clear who held the upper hand.
"Just wrapping up here," Anastasia said, trying to keep her tone light despite the sudden shift in dynamics. She glanced at Christian, a flicker of regret passing between them as if they both understood that their moment had been interrupted. But she couldn't ignore the way José's jaw tightened at the sight of their interaction.
Christian straightened up, his mouth twisted in disdain, betraying his smug confidence as reached for his lunch bag on the counter and took a step back toward the door, maintaining his composure even as he felt the weight of José's scrutiny on him.
He met José's gaze without flinching. "I guess I'll be on my way then," he said coolly, flashing a flawless smile that masked an underlying challenge in his tone before turning to Ana again.
"I'll see you around then," Christian said smoothly, offering Anastasia one last lingering look, a look that was filled with promise and unspoken words. But it wasn't long before his expression shifted slightly and there was a flicker of something deeper behind those cool gray eyes.
Anastasia smiled softly and crossed her arms, as if to hug herself for comfort. "Bye, Christian."
"Thanks for inviting me out today," Christian said, feeling the distance between them grow once more, and it stung more than he expected. "I really needed this break," his voice cracked ever so slightly at the end, betraying the frustration and longing that had built up inside him.
As the door swung shut behind Christian, José's expression darkened. He turned to Ana, arms crossed tightly over his chest. "Christian? What was that all about?" he demanded, his voice laced with concern.
Anastasia raised an eyebrow, feeling a mix of annoyance and defensiveness. "It was just a conversation, José. He's interested in the bookstore."
"Interested? Or interested in you?" José shot back, unable to hide the edge of jealousy creeping into his tone.
"Seriously? You're being ridiculous," Ana replied, rolling her eyes. "He's just a businessman looking after his investment."
"A businessman who looks at you like that?" José scoffed, shaking his head. "I don't trust him, Ana. He seems like trouble."
Anastasia folded her arms. "And you think I can't handle myself?"
"Look, I'm just trying to look out for you," José stepped closer, frustration evident in his voice. "You have no idea what kind of guy Grey is. He could be playing mind games with you."
"José," she said, meeting his gaze with unwavering resolve. "I appreciate your concern, but I can make my own choices. I'm not going to let your paranoia dictate my life."
He ran a hand through his hair in exasperation. "It's not paranoia. What if he hurts you? You deserve someone who actually cares about you."
Anastasia felt a flicker of irritation at his insistence but also recognized the genuine worry behind it. "And you think he doesn't care? You barely know him."
"I think he cares about getting what he wants," José replied sharply. "And right now, that seems to be you."
She took a step closer to him. "Listen, I'm not some prize to be won or protected from the big bad guy. I can take care of myself and my own feelings."
"Just promise me you'll be careful? That you won't let him get too close?"
Ana sighed deeply. "I'll be careful on my own terms, okay? But I won't let your fears control how I live my life."
He opened his mouth to argue but then closed it again as he processed her words. The tension hung thick between them as Anastasia turned to stare out the window.
"Fine."
Christian stepped out of the bookshop, the door closing behind him with a soft chime that felt like a final note in an unfinished symphony. The cool air hit him, but it did little to clear the lingering thoughts of Anastasia Steele from his mind.
He spotted Taylor standing by the sleek black Audi parked at the curb, and Taylor quickly moved to meet him halfway as he walked briskly toward him.
As he approached, Christian held out the paper bag containing his untouched burrito. With a slight grimace, he handed it over to Taylor without making eye contact. "Here, you can take this," he said, his tone clipped. "Not for me."
Taylor accepted the bag with a nod, his expression remaining neutral as always. "Sir." He glanced at the contents briefly, aware of Grey's rigorous diet regimen.
Christian adjusted his cufflink as they headed for the vehicle, Taylor falling into step beside him.
"My car is parked two blocks away," he mentioned casually, though there was an edge to his voice that hinted at some irritation.
"Of course, sir. Sawyer is going to take care of it while I bring you back to the office."
Christian nodded appreciatively and cast a final glance back at the bookshop before sliding into the limo's back seat, allowing himself a brief moment of reflection. Taylor closed the door before turning toward the trunk of the limo, opening it and placing the bag inside as if it were merely an afterthought, something unworthy of further consideration.
The Audi's interior was quiet and luxurious, a stark contrast to the whirlwind of emotions still swirling within Grey. As Taylor settled into the driver's seat and started the engine, Christian leaned back against the sumptuous leather, watching the world outside blur into a haze. The hum of the engine and the soft rhythm of the tires faded, in his mind he replayed the kiss.
Absentmindedly, Christian traced his thumb over his lips where the softness of Anastasia's pout still lingered. A flicker of something unexpected stirred in his chest, catching him off guard. Grey frowned slightly, grappling with the sensation that had crept in uninvited.
Clearing his throat, Christian tried to regain his composure, but the uncertainty was still apparent in his eyes, a reminder that he was not as in control as he wanted to be.
"Let's get moving," he said finally, pulling out his phone and glancing at the deluge of emails and messages on the screen. His voice was oddly husky, betraying a hint of emotion he tried to suppress as his expression hardened, masking any trace of vulnerability while he composed himself for whatever came next.