Note: This is a Larry and Sebastian focused chapter. We'll be back to the others after.

Golden rays of evening sun shone through the tiny gaps in the barn's wooden walls, dust particles hanging suspended in a never ending dance, swirling and flicking in multiple directions. Sebastian had expected the temperature to drop as the evening set in. Although January and February were behind them, early March was nowhere near the summer weather he craved where Larry and he would spend countless lazy days on some forgotten corner of his country estate, taking walks, swimming in his lake, making out in the meadows ...

"Bucket, Seb!"

Sebastian jumped, whirling around in the voice's direction. "I'm sorry, what?"

Larry, with his sleeves rolled up to his elbows, revealing his muscular arms, peeked over the car, resting his forearms on the gleaming bonnet. He bit his lip and grinned. "Daydreaming, I see. I'm curious to know what about? Must be me."

"You would think that."

The intensity of his gaze punctuated Larry's silence, making Sebastian feel as though he were the subject of a silent, all-encompassing appraisal, a mixture of admiration and assessment. "Bucket?" Larry repeated. "Are you able to bring it over, or shall I leave you to your thoughts?"

The reason Sebastian had been standing by an old drinking trough had slipped his mind. "Oh, right ... of course." He carried the bucket, making sure not to slosh too much water over the sides, and took the dirty one at Larry's feet to dispose of the water outside.

They'd been happily working together to tidy up Larry's beloved Dusenberg Model J. It was Larry's car by ownership, but they both cherished it. It carried many happy memories of their years together and was their pride and joy. It also was worth an astonishing fortune. Whilst these reasons made Sebastian willing to spend his day, dusty, wet and away from his home comforts, the other more shining reason was that the car gave him an opportunity to spend time with Larry in a situation where they could become close again, without feeling rushed. They'd dusted, swept, polished – and then polished again as Larry was a perfectionist – until their car gleamed with superiority and luxury once again. Larry had taken care of the maintenance side of things and, since he was the expert in that department, Sebastian had left him to it. They'd seen no one else all day, save Emily, who'd come by with some sandwiches and lemonade for lunch, and even though his limbs ached for rest, Sebastian hadn't felt so content in a long time.

As Sebastian returned to the barn, the sun falling closer to the horizon, flickering through the trees, he heard Larry humming to himself. It was a song they'd danced together at Joanne's last November when they'd visited her and Jimmy's club along with Thomas, Richard, David, Chris, Izzie and Lucy. It was a song, performed for the world to be about a 'normal' love, but written secretly for a love like theirs. Sebastian placed the bucket silently on the ground by the door. As he watched Larry from the barn door, scrubbing and shining the wheels and runner boards, pausing and stepping back to check he'd not missed a spot, Sebastian found it incomprehensible that several days ago he had wanted to leave him. Larry's humming of Mad About A Boy turned to gentle singing. Sebastian's heart raced, and his hitched intake of breath came louder than he could control – loud enough for Larry to notice he was being watched.

"Almost done, I think," Larry said, brushing himself down and tossing the sponge into the bucket of soapy water with an overly casual flare. "Thanks for the bucket," he added with an awkward smile.

Unable to suppress the feeling, a smile bloomed on Sebastian's face, warming his heart, betraying his happiness. It seemed incredibly familiar ... they were acting like they did right at the very beginning. Decades ago. Had it been that long?

"I suppose in the morning we could come back again and check in better light if I'd missed anything, but ..." Larry tilted his head and frowned. "What?" Larry surveyed the car with a scrutinising eye. "I missed something. What? It's blatantly obvious, isn't it Seb? Tell me ... save me the embarrassment, will you?" he added, making a mock begging gesture with his hands. "I'm out of practice."

Sebastian sauntered over to him. "Anything but. I can't see anything other than perfection."

"Nothing missed then?"

"Nope."

"And you are talking about the car?"

Sebastian shrugged. "The car, you ... likely both."

Larry took a step backwards, looking at the ground, rubbing the back of his neck. "A compliment then? From you. I must have done something right."

"You do most things right." Pride pushed aside, Sebastian took Larry's hand, cold and damp with water, in his. Larry looked down at their joined hands, as though transfixed by the sight. "Those that you did wrong, we're past. I remember that song," he said, leaning his head in so he spoke close to Larry's ear. "I was so in love with you that evening."

Larry pulled back. Their hands parted. "Was?"

Sebastian hesitated and regretted it, owing to the deflated look in Larry's eyes. The need to restore Larry's usual sparkle, brightness, and positivity filled him. He slid one hand around Larry's waist, over his hip, hooking a few fingers around the back of his braces. Then he hesitated again, but only to let Larry move next. For a moment, Sebastian feared Larry wouldn't reciprocate, but then he felt the tentative touch of damp, but warming fingers on his shoulder, then at his neck. "I still do."

Simple words, but enough to ignite Larry's smile once again. "I don't deserve you, but I need you. Today has been heaven. If this is how it is when we die, I want my heaven this way. Me and you."

"Seems you've been reading too many of Richard's novels whilst hiding in this village," Sebastian teased, bowing their heads together. Larry's breath mingled with his own, his lips tantalisingly close. Larry's heart thumped hard against Sebastian's chest. Was that a trembling in Larry's hand against his neck? Did his breath stutter out of a kind of fear one has when he is so close to getting what one wants? Sebastian couldn't move, couldn't take that next step. They'd kissed thousands of times before. Why was it so hard to now?

At last, Larry tested the waters, his nose grazing Sebastian's before their lips met in a delicate first kiss. As they parted, foreheads still a hair's length away from each other, Sebastian let out a stuttered breath, one he'd not know he'd been holding. They kissed again, Sebastian sensing the initial stiffness in Larry's body against his own; the tension eased and flowed away as their kisses grew more profound, yet deliberate. Sebastian lost his footing as Larry shuffled whilst angling his chin for a better position. He would have stumbled backwards if Larry hadn't of caught him, pulling him back close with some urgency.

"Stay," Larry mumbled into his lips.

"Always," Sebastian breathed. How could he have contemplated leaving this man? He must have been delusional. Sebastian wasn't so delusional though as to think they could carry on as they were. Danger could be the wrong person at the wrong time, coming through the unsecured barn door to discover them. He pulled back. Sunset had just passed and Larry's flushed features were still notable, as was his expression of disappointment and impatience. "We should get back to the farm." If only he could ignore the need to be sensible.

"So much for 'always'," Larry said with a pinched smile.

"I meant that. I'll stay with you, Larry, but we can't stay here. Anyone could walk in."

Larry nodded his reluctant understanding. "Not worth risking."

Sebastian picked up his hat, brushing it off and turned towards the barn door, expecting to hear Larry fast behind him. Leaving it there caused unbearable agony, but they had to hold off until away from potential prying eyes.

A soft scuffing sound, like leather against packed earth, echoed through the barn.

"Marry me."

Sebastian's breath hitched, mouth drying at the words. He dared not move, caught mid-step close to the door. That can't have been right. Larry wouldn't ... It was unthinkable. Yet, the words echoed around his mind, into every corner, whirling over and over. Was it one of Larry's jokes? It was a poor one, if that was the case. Larry had been desperate for him to stay. Was he still afraid to be left alone? Had that kiss meant something else? Nothing made sense. Sebastian closed his eyes, pinching them tight shut, longing for a moment of clarity. It was impossible.

With tentative steps, he turned towards Larry. He hadn't moved, and the flush in his cheeks had vanished, replaced with a pale pallor. This was no joke. "What?" Sebastian asked, returning to him.

"You heard me. Marry me?"

Sebastian blinked, mouth opening, then closing ... wordless and incapable. "I don't ... If this is your idea of teasing me ...?"

"Do I look like I'm joking?" Larry took his hand, holding him firm. "I keep wondering if this is some awful nightmare, that I'll wake up alone in the tiny room at Matthew's farmhouse, having found out its all in my mind and that you're not really here. I know ... I sound crazy." Larry's grip squeezed a little, looking at him with serious eyes. "I have been the worst of people, and I feared I'd never spend another moment with you like I have all of today, just been together, in each other's company. Comfortable, safe. You, Seb, are heaven sent, to give me another chance and I want to make the promise to be yours and only yours, official."

"If this is only out of gratitude—"

"No! It's love Seb. I love you. Simple as that."

The look on Larry's face, the wobble in his voice, gave rise to a softening feeling of longing. Never did he imagine anyone would propose to him, let alone a man. It was a prospect he'd always pushed aside if the thought arose. "We can't Larry. What do you imagine would happen if we went to the vicar here in Downton or anywhere and asked him to marry us?"

"I know, I know." Both of Larry's hands were clasping Sebastian's now, as though he were a lifeline in a vicious storm. "The law, the views of the majority prevent it and we may never get to know anything better than what we can have now, but Seb ... I know there is nothing written in law that prevents me from asking you, and from you saying yes."

"Nothing that prevents us from becoming engaged?"

"Exactly. It's still a promise, even only a private one."

Sebastian looked away, then back again. "Wouldn't that be painful? To only ever be close to what we want?"

To his surprise, Larry's lips twitched, then grew into a delightful smile that shone through his eyes.

"What? What did I say?"

"You said, 'what we want'."

"Oh." Sebastian freed himself from Larry's grasp, taking a couple of steps back. "Ask me again."

Larry swallowed, hands fluttering as though he didn't know what to do with them. In the end, he closed the gap between them, holding Sebastian at the waist. "Seb, will you marry me, even if we never get married?"

Sebastian chuckled. "Well, that was romantic?"

Larry frowned and gave him a little kick.

"Sorry. Yes. Even if that's as far as it goes, then yes. I will."

Larry beamed, threw his arms around Sebastian's neck, and kissed him. "We can have rings, Richard and Thomas do. They keep them hidden, but they've had them for years. What do you say?"

"And if your servants find them?"

"They won't say a word. They like you and they know enough anyway," Larry blurted out in his excitement. "How about a honeymoon? Here or abroad? We could travel. We could—"

Sebastian silenced him with a kiss. "One step at a time."

Larry stopped, breathing hard, eyes dilated, his fingers curling around the hem of Sebastian's shirt that had loosened earlier on. "What now?"

Sebastian had many sensible ways to answer that question. But he didn't want to be sensible at that moment. He glanced sideways to the car, its luxurious leather seats inviting them in. Larry had always boasted the Dusenberg Model J's impeccable suspension. He tugged Larry in close, who let out a soft gasp of surprise, and stole several further kisses when Larry, whose breathing had quickened, playfully nipped Sebastian's lower lip, giving it a little tug with his teeth. That was all it took for any notion of circumspect behaviour to be disregarded as quickly as he wished to remove their clothing. Tempting danger had been something they'd both found alluring in their years together. "Larry," he began, tone low, voice raw, "get in the backseat."

Merry Christmas :)