It was getting harder to ignore the dark man in the corner of the room of requirement staff room every night. They'd taken to mostly leaving him be, after Severus had almost snapped several of their head's off. Filius seemed to be the only one who could get a half-friendly reply when asked if he was doing alright. They all knew he was in pain, and nobody was taking it personally. But, it was making them all upset. Whether he'd believe it or not, Severus had grown to mean a lot to them all. With Minerva in the hospital, they all knew it was killing him. He was still going on his weekly disappearances to Death Eater gatherings. Poppy was still treating his occasional injuries, though they were less and less as the weeks went on. It seemed he had won the Dark Lord over. That was the extent that Rolanda knew of his life.

Rolanda sat on the couch behind Severus as he marked his papers. She couldn't understand why he would sit in the staff room each night if he didn't want to be bothered. He was obviously lonely and didn't know how to handle it. A huge cloud had fallen over the staff since Minerva had been hurt. It wasn't just Severus, the entire staff's morale was down. "Severus?"

"I told you last night, Ro; leave me alone."

"Why would you be sitting in here if you wanted to be left alone?" Severus didn't reply. Rolanda laid back and put her feet up on the coffee table in front of her. "We all miss her. You can talk about it."

"I have marking to do," he snapped.

"Maybe you'd be more productive with it if you weren't keeping everyone out."

Severus turned around. "What is it that you want?"

"You to talk."

"The more I talk, the more we're at risk." Rolanda saw through his anger; there was genuine fear there. "The fun and games you all love are gone. At least for me. It was ridiculous for me to ever involve myself with you lot…to get…"

"Close?"

"Yes."

"Friendship is not such a bad thing," Rolanda pointed out, pushing back on him. "We all know you have more important duties. But, we all love each other."

"You'll never know complications in your life, Rolanda," he snapped. She didn't take it personally. She couldn't. All he knew of her was her love of drinking, her friends, and sex. She kept most relationships that way. She liked being the light in the group.

"I prefer not to have them."

"That's a great privilege."

"I've had my fair share of them," she added, more seriously than she'd ever allowed herself to speak to Severus. "Did you learn of the Muggle's great war?"

"Yes, why is that relevant?"
"I tried to be the hero then," she admitted. Rolanda felt her face growing red at the repressed memory. Severus needed to know she wasn't all games. It was the only way anyone would get through to him. She knew that if she opened up, he may listen to her. "I just had gotten my job with the Ministry; I was flying high. No pun intended," she added. Severus snorted slightly. "I thought that I could help the Muggle war efforts. But, I suppose my young self didn't realize how dark the Muggle world could be. I thought I could be…a hero. But, I saw a lot of what that war did. Let's just say a broom wasn't going to withstand the things I was trying to naively go up against."

"You were injured?"

"My broom got scorched. That's the worst that happened to me. But, the horrors stayed in my mind." She rubbed her temples and let out a long sigh. "The trenches, the blood, the violence…I kept trying to go out and help, but I couldn't. There was no way to help without violating the Statute of Secrecy. I had to watch. And, finally, I couldn't. I suppose that's why I am the way I am. No use in keeping yourself in that dark place. When the letter from Hogwarts came, I accepted that day. I had to get out of there."

"And the obsession with sex?" Severus asked lightly.

"I suppose that's just me," she jabbed back. "You need us, Severus."

"I wish that were true, Ro." That was the most vulnerable thing he'd ever said to her. His eyes were dark and his voice quiet.

"There's a lot you're not telling us, eh?"

"Yes."

"Care to share?"

"Can't share."

Silence fell over them. "I know it's not the same," Rolanda finally said. She always hated silence. "But, I want you to know I do know what this type of darkness feels like. I'm not all 'fun and games'."

"I'm sorry," Severus muttered. She smiled at his apology. She knew that was a big deal for him.

"It's alright. Hey, without Quidditch, I don't have much purpose here this year. If you need anything…"

"I know." Silence again. Severus looked like he was barely grading the essays in front of him. Suddenly. he threw his quill down and leaned back in his chair, gripping his arm. "Fuck."

Rolanda was very much out of the Order's activities, but she knew what his arm hurting meant. "You alright?"

"I have to go," he mumbled. He closed his eyes. Rolanda reached over and put a hand on his shoulder. Severus didn't move it.

"You looked tired."

"I'm exhausted."

"I thought her being gone would make this part easier, but it doesn't."

"You do what you need to do. Want me to take your parchments to your room?"

Severus moved away from her hand. "Yes. The password is mo chat."

Rolanda smiled. "Scottish?"

"Indeed."

"Be safe, Severus," Rolanda said, rubbing his shoulder again and picking up the stack of parchments in front of him. Severus didn't say anything, but thanked her again before Rolanda left.

It was eerie in the halls since Umbridge had taken over. Before, you could always find students walking around or sneaking around after bedtime. She missed that lightness. Now, there was only silence and sadness. She'd recently found one of the first years crying on the shoulder of the Weasley twins. Seeing the two normally spunky and fun boys comforting someone in shared sadness had struck something in Rolanda. As much headache as they caused, they'd always brought much joy into the Quidditch fields. She smiled at the love potion Severus had told her they'd given Minerva earlier in the year. She approached the doors to Severus's room, realizing she'd never actually gone inside. She muttered the password and the doors opened.

The rooms looked as she'd imagined. Dull and plan. It looked like a solitary prison cell, with the bare amount of furniture and lack of decorations. She put the parchments down on his simple, wood coffee table. "Who are you?" a small voice came.

Startled, Rolanda looked all around until her eyes fell to a small house elf in the corner of the living room. "I'm Madame Hooch; I'm a teacher here. I was bringing these back for Severus." She pointed to the parchments.

"You're a friend?"

"I'm a friend," Rolanda said, trying to smile.

The tiny house elf was polishing something and put it down. "Okay. I will be back soon, when Master Snape comes back." She snapped her fingers and was gone.

Rolanda couldn't help but walk to the thing the house elf was polishing, which she could see was a picture frame. She picked it up and smiled. Inside was a photo of Severus and Minerva, Minerva smiling and Severus scowling. They were somewhere, not Hogwarts. Rolanda was glad they'd been away from the stress of school at least once in their lives. She remembered them talking once about Paris, the result of a lost bet between them. Her curiosity struck, trying to see if there were any other signs of their relationship in his rooms. It seemed the house elf was going to be gone a bit. It was so strange to get a glimpse into Severus's life and how really intertwined the two were.

Rolanda walked into Severus's bedroom, and again, it was plain. His bed was a simple, metal frame with black blankets. There were pillows on both sides, and Rolanda knew it must have been for Minerva. In his closet hung a full row of all black robes, with a few white collared shirts mixed in. Despite the pristine appearance of the room, she did notice a piece of red lingerie hanging on the back of one of the chairs in the corner. She smiled. On his bedside was a pocket watch. Rolanda picked it up and inside was a photo of Minerva. She looked beautiful, her hair down and her eyes bright. He must have taken the photo; she looked caught off guard in the moving image. She couldn't imagine her friend giving him permission to take the photo.

Rolanda put the pocketwatch down, knowing she'd overstayed her welcome. She loved her friends, even Severus. The year had taken a toll on all of them, and she hoped that they were alright. The signs of their relationship in his room, even if small, made her feel at ease. Somehow, the odd relationship had become the backbone of the staff. When Minerva and Severus were alright, the staff would be alright. Minerva was everyone's rock and Severus was hers. Besides, they cared about them both so much.

The house elf was back, staring at her as she came out of the bedrooms. "You take this job seriously, huh?" she asked. "What's your name?"

"Sippy."

"Nice to meet you, Sippy. My name is Rolanda."

"Master Snape back yet?"

"I don't think so. What do you do while he's gone?"

"Well, normally Missy Minerva…and…" Sippy covered her mouth. Rolanda could tell that she'd been told to keep the relationship a secret. As soon as Sippy went to bang her head on the wall, Rolanda rushed to her and grabbed the tiny elf's arm. She avoided the entire house elf situation; she knew she should do more- the entire history of their relationship with wizards disgusted her. Seeing them hurt themselves tore her heart out.

"I know about Minerva and Severus. Minerva is my best friend. You can talk in front of me."

Sippy nodded. "Missy Minerva and Sippy play chess. She teaches Sippy to play."

"Did you hear about Minerva?" Rolanda asked Sippy.

Tears came to Sippy's eyes, and Rolanda saw she wiped them away. "Yes."

"She's going to be okay."

"Mister Snape is not."

"What?"

"He's always gloomy and sad, but now Sippy sees he is extra sad. He's extra mean." Sippy continued to wipe her tears.

"I know," Rolanda said, half-chuckling. "He's been extra mean to us too."

"Would Miss Rolanda like tea?"
"I'll take a cup if you're making it."

"I brought some for Mister Snape." Sippy pushed a cart towards Rolanda, poured her a cup and handed it to her.

"You know everything about him, huh?"

"Excuse me, Miss Rolanda?"
"I said you must know everything about Mister Snape."

"Sippy knows many things."

"Do Minerva and Severus seem happy?"

Sippy nodded vigorously. "Mister Snape is only happy when Missy Minerva is here. I heard him say 'I love you' once. Missy Minerva told me to make sure I always take care of Mister Snape."

"Is Mister Snape good to you?"

"Yes! Mister Snape told Sippy to stop calling him 'Master.' Mister Snape said it sounds evil." Rolanda nodded, unsure of what to say. Severus was full of mystery. That simple fact made Rolanda like him more. It said a lot about him. Rolanda was sure this was the most she would ever learn of the man that had kept her confused for so many years. She suspected nobody would ever know this much. That's how he was. In all their years working together, Filius was the only person he'd ever spent time with alone. And, Filius was always tight-lipped about those evenings. Rolanda wasn't sure if it was because Severus had confided in him or if Severus had had nothing to say. Filius didn't like to be pressed on their friendship, and after a few years of trying, they'd given up on getting more information. Yet, the man had always stumped Rolanda. She'd grown to love him, but she was never quite sure if she should. "Mister Snape hasn't been very nice lately. I has heard him crying."

"Crying?"

"Yes. Sippy didn't mean to. I came with tea, but he was in bed crying."

"Was this since Minerva's attack?"
"Yes. A few nights ago. Sippy tried to wait, but Mister Snape would not stop crying. I didn't want to bother him. He was laying in bed crying."

Rolanda sighed. "You're keeping a good eye on him. Merlin knows he won't let anyone else."

"What do I do if he cries again?"

"Leave him be," Rolanda answered. "For your own safety."

Silence fell between the two until the door to the rooms opened. Rolanda instinctively pulled out her wand, but lowered it when Severus walked in, looking more exhausted than before. "Gossiping with the house elves now, Ro? Seems low, even for you." She was surprised that all she'd received was a sarcastic comment. She figured he'd be furious at the privacy invasion. His eyes looked as if they could barely stay open.

"Good night, Severus." She touched his arm as she walked out the door, but Severus, rather forcefully, caught her arm back.

"Rolanda…" His voice was hoarse. "Are you going to St. Mungo's tomorrow?"

"I haven't visited her yet. I planned on going soon."

His grip on her arm tightened. "I…can you go tomorrow?"

"Have you seen her since this happened?" Severus let go of her arm.

"Once."

"How was it?"

"I can't go back…I'll…it's a risk, for us both. I can't. There has to be space now…"

Rolanda knew whatever risk he was talking about was beyond her comprehension or knowledge. "I'll have the group of us go. I'll send your regards."

"I met Malcolm."

Rolanda shut the door to his rooms, afraid their voices were leaking into the hall. "Malcolm McGonagall?" Severus nodded. "I didn't know you two were…"

"We're not. It was an accident."

"I do remember that Poppy wrote to him. How was that?"

"What's your impression of him?"

"As adults, I've only met him a few times. He seems fine enough." In truth, Rolanda had always found Malcolm uppity, but it didn't seem the time to tell Severus. Malcolm had been in her year at Hogwarts, and he'd always been the perfect student- captain of the Quidditch team, Prefect, Head Boy, etc. He was a less relatable version of Minerva. He had many of her traits, but none of her personality. "How was that encounter?"

"The same if you found out your sister was shagging a man thirty years her junior"

Rolanda laughed the hardest she had in weeks. She almost choked on her own saliva. "That's one way to put it. Though, I do think I'd be proud of my sister for scoring a younger man. Unless, of course, he had your personality. But, I'd still imagine your body being better than that of the men of our age." Severus smirked, and Rolanda knew this was the closest to bonding they'd ever get, especially as Severus was shutting everyone out more and more. "You've got nothing to worry about with Malcolm, if that's your fear." He nodded. "You know Minerva doesn't listen to anyone. Malcolm has been asking her to retire for years, ever since their brother died."

"You should go," Severus said. Rolanda nodded. Cautiously, she reached out and hugged Severus. For a few moments, he was stiff in his response, but his body softened slightly. Rolanda rubbed his back, never having been this close to him. He smelled rather good, like the aftermath of a campfire with a hint of some Muggle cologne she'd once caught a whiff of. His body felt boney under her hug, but she could tell he needed it. They pulled away, and Rolanda left, knowing that was probably both the most physically and emotionally close she'd ever be to the Potions Master.