The moon was shining down from the sky.

Percy sat in the corner of his room where his window was, glancing out as snowflakes fell softly to the ground. It should have been a happy occasion, everyone else was merry and bright. But he couldn't be. It felt like some barrier had set itself in between Percy and the rest of the world. To an outsider's view, he must have appeared sullen and unwilling to socialize with the family. It couldn't have been further from the truth.

Things started going downhill at the train station. Mum came to pick them all up, her temper beginning to ignite when Fred and George-along with Lee whom they'd invited to stay-were nowhere to be found. Instead of coming straight off the train to meet them near the large clock, they'd gone off to the other end of the platform where Angelina, Alicia and Katie were waiting for their parents.

"Percy, go fetch them," Mum ordered.

"Mum, I'm hungry," Ron complained.

"You're always hungry," Ginny rolled her eyes

"She's right," Harry grinned, which made Ginny flush not that he seemed to notice.

"Erm," Percy knew that wasn't a good idea. They wouldn't appreciate it in the slightest. "Actually, Mum; can we just wait a few more minutes? I'm sure they'll be here soon."

"No, Dear. Just go find them," Mum told him, turning her attention and raising her voice when his brother and sister continued to argue over Ron's insatiable appetite. Although, to anyone else she didn't simply raise her voice. She was by all accounts, yelling.

And out in public.

It was embarrassing. His mum had no qualms about it, though. She didn't care if someone looked at her funny or whispered their judgment to anyone else. There was no use in bringing the topic up to her either; she would deny she'd done anything wrong. Percy loved his mum, honest he did. It was just sometimes he felt she was a bit too stubborn.

Once his brothers finally came-after Percy had purposely waited, which luckily his mum hadn't noticed-with Lee in tow, he only then realized what a packed house the Burrow was going to be. The three Gryffindor chasers were going to be stopping by later on after they got settled in at their respective homes. They couldn't stay the night like Lee was going to but they would be hanging around for a few hours. Not to mention, Mum said that Bill and Charlie were going to be coming back for a visit. That was going to be a total of fifteen people in the house, including himself. All at once.

Fifteen people. Fourteen voices all wanting to be heard over the other. Percy was starting to feel suffocated already. He'd been the last one to get inside the house when they all arrived back. Dad was still working and would be for a while longer. So it was just Mum and all the children for now.

He'd been able to escape when they came back to the sanctuary of his bedroom. For now, Mum was getting to the kitchen to prepare their supper. It wasn't until then, where he would be seated amongst everyone, that trouble would brew. He would either be forced to participate in the conversation that followed or be forgotten entirely.

And as he found out, the latter didn't happen, much as he silently hoped for it to occur.

"You didn't write to us, Percy," Mum said as they passed around the various dishes. Bill and Charlie still weren't there yet. She'd wanted to wait but Dad suggested they go on without them.

He felt every pair of eyes on him. "I was busy," he lied.

That's not even a good lie

Busy with what, exactly?

No one will believe that

"Course," Ron scoffed not so quietly, causing Hermione to elbow him.

"But you always write to us," Mum persisted, becoming upset.

He hated disappointing her and Dad. Hated to hurt them. But how could he tell him the real reason why he hadn't written?

"It's N.E.W.T.S year, Mother," Percy fixed his posture, putting on that Head-Boy facade, that thing that made him sound like he was more important than anyone else. "I've got to do well if I want a chance to make it in the Ministry."

You sound as every bit stuck up as they think you are

He didn't even want to be in the Ministry anymore. Or anything else, really. But this was what was expected of him. He was supposed to be a Ministry-Loving-Fanatic. That's what they saw him as.

There were a few scoffs to this. He knew how everyone else viewed the Ministry-not to mention; Fred, George and Lee were greatly against anything they saw as boring. His Mum had been supportive of his decision to go into the Ministry, though that support waned a bit with the direction the Ministry had been going in lately by Minister Fudge's orders.

"Yes, of course but-" His mum was cut off by Dad.

"Surely you have some spare time in your hands, yes?"

Percy opened his mouth.

"Oi, Percy!" Fred said from the other end of the table-which was enchanted to lengthen. "Me and Georgie saw your girlfriend kissing another bloke!" He turned to his twin. "What's her name? Prunella? Phoebe?"

Penny

Her name is Penny

And she isn't my girlfriend

Not anymore, she isn't

"Penny," George supplied.

"Ah, right you are," Fred turned his attention back onto Percy.

Mum gasped. "Oh, you poor dear."

"It's...it's alright," Percy wished for nothing more than to sink through the floor. "We broke up."

There

I said it

"You did?" Dad blinked.

"Err, yes."

Fred grinned. "Finally got tired of ya, Perce?"

As a matter of fact, yes

"What'd you do, bore her with how many times you shined your Head-Boy badge?" George quipped.

"That's enough, you two!" Mum snapped. "Don't think I've forgotten your little stunt you played on your brother!"

"Which one?" Fred snickered.

"Brother or stunt?" George added.

Mum's lips were in a thin line. "Professor McGonagall wrote to me about what you did to Percy during supper."

Ron must have suddenly remembered something, for he asked loudly. "Why didn't they get a howler for that?"

Could it be that Ron was showing offense on Percy's behalf?

"You sent me one for flying Dad's car! It's not fair!"

...Of course not.

"Not now, Ron," Mum said and refocused back onto the twins. "Well?"

"It wasn't meant for him, Mum," George said.

"Right. We meant to get McLaggen."

But Mum was in her no-nonsense mood. "I don't care who you aimed it for. You're not to test out these ideas on anyone and that includes your brother."

"Of course, Mum," Fred said, sharing a grin with Lee.

"Definitely not," George added with a familiar mischievous gleam in his eyes, twinkling similarly to Professor Dumbledore's.

"I mean it, you two," She wagged a finger at them.

He should have been grateful she'd said anything at all, as other times she would gloss over a situation entirely if her attention was focused on other things. He just couldn't help but wish she'd said more, that she'd done something other than simply telling them not to bother him. That never worked. If it had, this conversation wouldn't be happening. He kept his mouth shut. He didn't say anything, didn't protest at the injustice. It wasn't worth making a fuss over.

The table conversation drifted away from Percy. However, unfortunately, that meant that multiple voices were conversing at once. Dad was telling Mum about a new rule being implemented. Lee, arms waving around, told a tale of how Flint had tried to come after him for the way he'd commented on the last game between Gryffindor and Slytherin. The twins, naturally, gave their own opinions on this. Then down the way; Harry, Hermione and Ron were being secretive as they usually were. Glances towards Mum and Dad were given before they continued on. Whatever they were talking about, they didn't want other people to know. And then there was Ginny. Unlike the rest, she didn't have or plan on having friends over. Now that he thought about it, he couldn't recall ever seeing her with someone. Of course, it wasn't like he saw her much at all at school. He hoped it didn't have anything to do with her being bothered by whoever it was. He didn't want her to be like him in that aspect.

Mum had tried to get her to play with the girl who lived nearby, Luna Lovegood. The Lovegoods were a bit on the odd side but were loads better than some of the other people at Hogwarts. But he digressed. Ginny had rejected that idea. She didn't like Luna, who didn't seem to share the same interests as her. Even when Mum had set up a playdate for them prior to Ginny attending Hogwarts, the two of them didn't talk much beyond his sister asking her what she would like to do and a goodbye when Mum had nudged her on the back.

The voices were making him squirmy. It was all at once. There was no escape from it. He had no choice but to bear with it until the meal was finished. None of them noticed how he wrung his hands underneath the table or counted the seconds or how he took deep, calming breaths to settle himself down.

"May I be excused?" Percy murmured. "Please?"

Mum frowned. "You've hardly touched your supper."

It was true. He'd taken, at the most, four bites.

"You're looking awfully thin these days, Percy."

"Probably eats more books than food," George joked.

"I'm fine," Percy put on a smile. "I'm just tired."

"It was a long train ride," Dad was trying to placate, to spare Mum's feelings.

"Couldn't you have just slept on the train?" Lee cut in, speaking directly to Percy for the first time.

"Now Lee," Fred feigned disapproval. "You know Percy of all people wouldn't stoop so low as to sleep on the train!"

George piped up. "Just what people think of him?"

You know what people think of you

And it isn't pretty

Unless, of course, you'd like a reminder?

"Please?" Percy disguised the anxiety in his voice. "I'd like to lie down for a bit."

"Are you sure?" Mum said. "If you'll just wait-"

Tap tap tap

Someone was tapping their shoe on the floor.

Tap tap tap

"I'm sure," he barely suppressed a wince.

"Course he's too good to be around us," he heard Ron mutter.

That's not it

I want to be here

I really do

I...

I just can't

He clumsily rose from the table, making the glasses and utensils clink.

He made it to the stairs, pausing when he heard the voices of everyone else chiming in.

"I just don't understand," Mum said to Dad. "What's gone wrong? Why doesn't he want to stay with us?"

"I'm sure it's not as bad as we think, Dear," Dad said. "Percy's at a rough age right now. He's stressed about the end of school coming up."

"It shouldn't be more important than family!"

"Face it, Mum," Fred said, his voice cheery. "He hates us."

"Don't say that," Mum said.

"It's true," George said. "Why else would he want to lie down?" He practically heard the air quotes.

Percy was only able to lie down for half an hour at the most. He was told by Ginny, who was sent up by Mum, to come back down. Everyone was in the living room doing something. It was a nightmare if he ever saw one. He wanted to avoid a fight, though. He wanted to avoid his Mum insisting how it was Christmas and whatever spilled out of her. He loved her, he did. And Dad. He loved them. He just didn't like how they would insist on togetherness when really he would have preferred to be alone.

He sat on the couch, knees pulled together, arms stiffly at his sides. He didn't want to touch anyone or anything. He probably looked ridiculous sitting there like that. He was so out of place amongst all those happy people.

He didn't want to feel alone but he did.

And it was likely as glaringly obvious to everyone else as it was to him.

"Percy, you mustn't just sit there," Mum had noticed this and came to say something.

"I really don't feel like it-"

"I've had enough of this!" His Mum's screech drew the jolly good mood to a pause. Much to his mortification, the music had abruptly stopped and everyone stared at the two of them. "Now I have tolerated this behavior long enough, young man."

Percy's mind was screaming.

"Christmas is a time for family," She lectured, her hair all frizzy and face redder than he'd ever seen it. "This is a time for us to be together. Not for you to be locked away in your room."

Percy swallowed.

"I thought this year might be different," She continued. To his horror, she started to cry. It was never a comfortable situation whenever she became emotional.

Ron tore himself away from Harry and Hermione, glaring at Percy. "What'd you do that for?"

"I didn't-"

"You didn't have to make her cry!"

"Boys," Dad warned, whilst holding Mum close. "That's enough."

"Fred's right, isn't he?" Ron was continuing to spew nonsense. "You hate us, don't you? Guess we're not perfect enough for you."

That was a low blow.

Percy's chest physically ached. "That's not true."

"Yeah, right," Ron scoffed.

"Ron," Hermione hissed. "Now is not the time-"

"I don't hate any of you," Percy's heart was beating rapidly.

"How do we know that?" Ron crossed his arms.

"I'm your brother," Percy was hurt. "I wouldn't-"

But somehow, those three little words set Ron off.

"Then act like it!"

Percy's words tumbled out just as fast. "How can I if I don't get the chance to?"

"Boys," Dad said again but louder.

This was a mistake

You shouldn't have come here

"I shouldn't have come," he whispered to himself but his words had reached the ears of everyone else.

"What?" Mum looked heartbroken. "What did you say?"

She'd heard.

"I-I just meant-"

"We know what you meant," Ginny hadn't said much, likely due to Harry's presence, but now she looked as angry as Ron had.

"Percy, how could you even say that?" Dad was looking upset too. And it wasn't as easy to upset him as it would be Mum.

Percy walked backwards. He had to get out of here. He needed to-

Unbeknownst to him, he'd been walking in the direction of the Christmas tree. Eyes were widened, mouths began to open but it was too late.

He'd knocked it over.

He watched, heart sinking as it fell to the floor with a crash. Ornaments were shattered and deadly silence ensued.

Percy glanced around, feeling shame gripped him. Without another word, he ran upstairs to his bedroom and slammed the door shut.

/

Percy's door creaked. His head snapped in that erection, watching as the tall figure of Bill came inside. His older brother smiled at him, seemingly the only one-other than Charlie-that wasn't angry with him.

"Hey."

"Hello," Percy said stiffly.

"Mind if I sit down?" Bill said pleasantly.

You will anyway

Percy merely gestured.

Bill took a seat on the edge of Percy's bed, looking past Percy to look out the window. "It's lovely out there, isn't it?"

"I suppose."

Bill was reminicing, apparently. "You know; I remember that time Charlie picked you up and threw you in the snow bank. Remember that?"

He did. He'd been a tiny child before his growth spurt happened. That day, Charlie had picked up straight up, holding him at his side, taking him out of the house and into the freezing cold. Percy had giggled the whole way in delight. He'd always loved it when Bill and Charlie included him in things.

"Yes," Percy said. He didn't like how his brother was studying him. Looking, peering at him so closely like he was some newly discovered animal.

"Are you okay, Perce?" Bill asked with concern.

"I'm-"

"Before you tell me you're fine, wait," Bill advised. "Are you really okay?"

"Yes," Percy was feeling antsy, so he sounded annoyed. Cranky from the questioning.

Bill didn't say anything right away. He inhaled and he exhaled through his nose. "Mum told me what happened," he said quietly.

Percy jumped to his feet. "It was an accident!" He said hotly.

"I realize that," Bill rose to his feet. As tall as Percy was, he didn't quite measure up to his brother's height by a good couple inches. "What happened, Perce? You can tell me."

No I can't

I can't tell anyone anything

You'll laugh at me

You'll think I'm strange

"It was nothing," Percy said instead.

"We both know that's not true."

"You weren't there," Percy said without looking at him. "You don't know."

"No," Bill agreed. "But you can't fool me. I know when something's up."

I wished you didn't

Percy remained silent.

"You used to love Christmas," Bill remarked-of which seemed out of place in the conversation. "You'd be ready for it right after Halloween was over."

He'd also been a lot happier than.

"I was a child," Percy fidgeted, his eyes on his lap.

"And what, you're too old for Christmas now?" Bill joked.

"You know what I mean."

"I know you're worrying us," Bill's face softened. "I'm worried about you. Charlie's worried."

He's lying

He has to be

No one else had noticed a thing

"You've got nothing to be worried about," Percy said calmly.

"I don't think that's true. And I don't think you believe that either."

It doesn't matter what you think

"Look," Bill said, "I don't know what exactly happened-"

"What, they didn't tell you?" Percy's mumble was full of bitterness.

"You know stories tend to be...exaggerated around here," Bill smiled wryly.

Percy let out a sigh, jumping about a foot in the air when a snowball hit his window.

What in the bloody-

"What was that?" Bill asked, bewildered.

Percy glanced out, spotting s familiar figure with a Gryffindor scarf wrapped around his neck.

Wood, he thought to himself exasperated.