Many apologies for the delay in getting this chapter written and out! I was gonna do NaNoWriMo last year and tried to get this done before then, which obviously didn't happen, but then I went and got sick and that unfortunately killed all the muses. I finally put my foot down and told myself, "You're writing this chapter, damn it!" And here we are.
Enjoy and happy very belated new year!
Chapter 13: Of apologies and tears and promises
"I fucked up."
Evelyn sniffs, contemplating only briefly the idea of ignoring her godfather. However, she's still somewhat riding the high of the knowledge that she can get her family back. Just the mere possibility of having the people she fought and bled beside able to look at her and know is enough for her to forgive Sirius' blunders. And, in the corner of her mind, she knows he was only working off of knowledge he thought was current. He truly had no way of knowing just how much had changed for them, for her. She'd just gotten caught up in the sudden swell of emotions and completely overreacted.
"You did," she agrees, "but so did I. None of us went into that situation prepared, so the blame is on all of us." She turns from the window she's been gazing out of to fix him with a look. "Do it again after I tell of my life and I will be far less forgiving."
He gives her a tired, strained smile. "You really aren't my little Prongslet anymore, are you?"
Evelyn sighs, patting the seat beside her. She waits until Sirius is settled before burrowing into his side, as her real size makes it so she fits perfectly there. "I'll always be your Prongslet, just like you'll always be my Padfoot, but I can't reiterate enough that I grew up, Sirius. I grew up and lived my life and made decisions based on who and what was left to me. You might not like or approve of some of them, but they're choices I made and had to live with, not you. I know you didn't mean to, but you and Remus left me, and Draco was the one who really picked up all of my broken pieces and put them back together again."
Her godfather makes a gagging sound while his arm around her tightens briefly. "Yeah, your, urgh, husband explained that to me."
She barely manages to stifle her laughter. "Would thinking of him as my betrothed help? Seeing as we aren't actually currently married but do plan to?"
"We'll see," he mutters.
A giggle escapes, and she presses a rapidly growing grin into his side.
"Did you actually get introduced to anyone, or did we all just yell at you?" she asks after they sit in silence for a few moments.
"Thor and Loki were the only ones who introduced themselves, but I can kind of guess your cousin's name, given how much you griped about him over summer break. Didn't expect him to defend Malfoy like he did." He blows out a breath that she hears rattle through his chest. "Never thought I'd see the day, a Muggle defending a Pureblood, and Heir Malfoy to boot."
"Dudley was a fucking arse when we were children, and he'll admit to such. We finally decided to go to therapy together when just talking was getting us nowhere and usually just descended into yelling."
"He informed me of that, among other things."
Evelyn huffs in exasperation. "I seem to collect ridiculously overprotective males wherever I go. I'll make sure they don't do that again."
Sirius barks out a slightly bitter laugh. "Eve, I think there's probably going to be a bunch of back and forth between all of us for a while. Don't think that's avoidable at this point."
She pulls back to scowl up at him. "Then you boys had better make sure to keep that out of my sight and hearing." She knows better than to demand that they don't fight. They're all headstrong males rather set in their ways. They're going to butt against each other with each thinking the others are wrong. It's because she's pretty sure most of their fights are going to in some way be about her that she wants nothing to do with said impending fights. She's had enough of people fighting about her and because of her.
Her godfather's expression becomes one of pained understanding. "Had enough fighting, eh, pup?"
Evelyn blows out a huff of air that stirs the curls framing her face. "Fighting, unfortunately, is something that I think is always going to be a part of my life." As Hela's Avatar, she's not sure there truly is anyway to avoid it, what with Hela being the Goddess of Death and all. "However, that doesn't mean I'm going to tolerate or make myself endure listening to people fight about me in any way, shape, or form." She pulls a disgruntled face. "Dumbledore cured me of that, if nothing else."
"Pup, Dumbledore—"
She holds up a hand to stop him. "Please, let's wait until Remus is here before we attempt to go at it over Dumbledore and his decisions. A great leader he might have been, that doesn't mean I approve of some of the decisions he made, given that the vast majority of them affected me." Now she takes one of Sirius' hands in hers and squeezes. "I promise, I will lay bare everything that happened to me, but I'd really rather only have to do it once." Her breath hitches unintentionally. "I made it through that war, but some of it…" She bows her head and presses into her godfather so she can hear his heartbeat. "Some of it really really sucked."
"Okay, Prongslet, I'll wait," Sirius murmurs.
"Thank you," she whispers. They sit there in silence for a bit as Evelyn just basks in the fact that Sirius is actually alive. "Right then." She heaves a huge sigh while moving away, even though she doesn't really want to. "We should probably go find Loki before he reaches his limit."
Her godfather cocks his head to side in a rather dog-like manner. "Limit for what?"
"I was dying in his arms before he used Soul Magic, and he only just got me back. Take a guess," Evelyn says a touch dryly.
Sirius' expression becomes pinced. "I'd really rather not."
"Fair enough." She pats his hand still in her grip once before letting go and getting to her feet. "Come on, we should be able to find him fairly quickly, and if not, we can just ask." She has to rein in the instinct to just reach out via her magic to try and locate her husband. The subtle ache near her heart flares painfully anytime she does, and it lingers.
It turns out that they don't have to go hunting for anyone.
As Evelyn rounds the corner, she runs straight into Thor. With a surprised yelp, she nearly tumbles over backwards. It's only the fact that both Thor and Sirius lunge to steady her that prevents her from hitting the ground.
"Don't do that!" she squawks, stupidly hitting Thor's arm in retaliation. She immediately starts shaking her hand, the sting on her palm making her curse under her breath. "Fucking hell, you'd think I'd've learned to not hit any of you freakishly fit males in my life." She scowls down at her still tingling palm.
"My apologies," Thor murmurs, a faint smile playing at his lips, "but I do agree that you really ought to have learned that by now."
Evelyn fixes him with a withering look. "Real helpful, thanks."
Thor's chuckles seems to rumble in the air around them. "You're welcome. I assume you were going to be looking for my brother?"
"No, I got myself a new mischief maker," Evelyn deadpans before scoffing. "Of course I'm looking for your brother. It's not like I know a lot of people around here."
"True enough. In any event, I am here at Mother's request. She's decided that it would be beneficial to have a luncheon together." Here Thor tips his head in Sirius' direction. "And to have Eir look your godfather over as soon as possible."
When Sirius pulls a face at the mere idea, Evelyn pats him on the arm as she knows exactly what he's probably thinking right now. "She's already looked me over. Just behave and it'll be over quickly."
"You shouldn't have needed looking over," Sirius mutters under his breath.
"Yeah, well, neither should you, and yet here we both are," Evelyn retorts back. "I'm doing it because I'd like to be taller and not have to worry about any health issues later in life. I'd suggest going with it if you want any chance at all of convincing the Ministry that you aren't a murdering raving lunatic."
"You may argue over it later, but I do believe Mother will win in the end," Thor interjects, placing a hand on both of their shoulders and applying a bit of pressure to get them both to start walking. "And I don't think we should keeping my brother waiting much longer."
"No, no we really shouldn't," Evelyn agrees.
Lunch ends up being in the same garden as before. Frigga even has the blanket spread out underneath the same apple tree. When the three of them step into sight, Loki all but jumps to his feet and sweeps Evelyn up into a hug that lifts her off her feet.
"Are you alright now, alskling?" His voice shudders through her.
Evelyn buries her face into his shoulder, breathing him in. "Better," she mumbles, allowing herself to cling just for a moment. "Down please, I need to do proper introductions."
"Can't you do that from here?" he grumbles back, tightening his grip on her.
She points out the rather obvious, "I can't see anyone," with her face still smooshed into his shoulder. And she still won't be able to see anyone if she lifts her head.
Loki heaves a sigh, shoulders slumping, but he sets her back on her feet. She holds on just long enough to be able to gently bump her forehead against his. A little bit of tension slides off his shoulders, but enough that he gifts her with a small but true smile. The one she gives back is most likely blinding, because Loki chuckles softly.
Assured that her husband is okay for the time being, Evelyn turns so she can latch back onto Sirius. He just gives her a bemused look, not attempting to dislodge her as she clamps onto his arm. "Guys, I'm sure you're already aware, but this is my godfather, Sirius Black. He's already apologized for the things he said to me, and I've apologized for the things I said to him, so no picking on him." Well, not really apologized to each other so much as acknowledged that they both screwed up, but she's willing to roll with that for now. Her Healer training makes her realize that it'll be a bit before she can expect a true, genuine apology that Sirius means beyond just having upset her. She sees Dudley sporting a slightly mutinous expression, which she quells with a glare. "Sirius, you've met my future husband, Loki—"
"Future husband?" Loki interrupts indignantly.
Evelyn sighs. "I'm trying to be nice to Sirius' delicate sensibilities." She feels more than sees her godfather puff up just as indignantly as her husband.
"Delicate sensibilities? What delicate sensibilities?" he demands. "I'm a Marauder! We don't have delicate sensibilities!
She pulls back to be able to see his face before drawling out, "Husband." He pulls a face just like she expected him to. "Those delicate sensibilities," she states, pointing a finger at him. "When you can hear me call Loki husband—" She nearly snorts when he does it again, "—without doing that I won't say you have delicate sensibilities." She's pleased that Loki's outright grinning now. "Moving right along, we have Loki's brother Thor, their mother Queen Frigga, and my cousin Dudley Dursley. I've already informed Sirius of this, but if you boys plan on having any shouting matches that are about me, do it out of my range of sight and hearing. Otherwise, I will yell back and trust me, I will win."
"So noted," Thor says a touch dryly, inclining his head before sitting down next to Dudley.
"Sweetling, your medicine," Frigga murmurs, jestering to three corked bottles.
Now it's Evelyn's turn to make a face because the potions are nasty. She's been taking them for the past two days with every meal. They're to help her gain weight while the ones Dudley is taking are to help him lose it. Regardless, they both agree the potions are vile for all that they're necessary. She grumbles profanities under her breath, but dutifully downs all three without gagging before dropping the empty bottles beside what she assumes are Dudley's empty potion bottles.
"I am going to be so happy once Eir says I don't have to take those anymore," she mutters, grabbing a plate and starting to snag any food that looks good. Because of the potions, she's eating a bit more than she's used to. Dudley, on the other hand, is making use of his former education to grab food that won't add too much extra weight onto what he's already trying to work off. Sirius, after gingerly lowering himself down, just picks at the minimal food on the plate that Thor passes him. She forcibly reminds herself that her godfather just got out of Azkaban. Trying to shove food down his throat to rectify his gaunt state will do more harm than good at the moment.
"As will I, but most likely for very different reasons," Loki agrees, settling himself on the blanket beside her. She automatically curls herself into him, still slightly disgruntled with her current size. However, she's not about to waste the pendant's time on something as simple as lunch now, not when it takes so freaking long to recharge.
"Tell me, daughter, who is this other man you wish to bring to Asgard?" Frigga inquires while filling up her own plate.
Evelyn lets a fond smile spread across her lips. "Remus Lupin was one of my father's childhood friends from Hogwarts along with Sirius. He ended up being one of my teachers my third year at Hogwarts and he's the reason I was able to save myself and Sirius at the end of that year."
"Fucking dementors," Sirius mutters under his breath. With his plate resting on the blanket, both his knuckles are bone white from how hard he's clenching his hands closed. Evelyn reaches over to lay a hand over his, only then feeling the faint trembling that's not visible. She's pretty sure that the grimace Sirius gives her is supposed to be a smile. She graciously don't point that little fact out.
"Eve," Dudley abruptly pipes up, "am I going to be able to see those creepy things now?"
Evelyn blinks once, mules over the thought, then pulls a face. "I'm teaching you the Patronus Charm as soon as possible," she states flatly.
"Prongslet, you're both eleven," Sirius points out. "The Patronus Charm is rather difficult for anyone to learn, let alone kids."
Rather than remind him again that she did it at thirteen her first go round on top of teaching her classmates at fifteen, Evelyn just lets her actions speak for themselves. She takes a moment to center herself and draw up an appropriate memory. Only then does she whisper, "Expecto Patronum." A rush of warmth washes over her as her magic gathers briefly in the palms of her cupped hands before dancing into the air behind her. There's the quiet sound of grass crunching underneath hooves and then a soft velvet muzzle presses up against her cheek. She lets her eyes flutter close as she leans into the touch.
"Oh my god," she hears Dudley breathe out over Sirius choking on air.
"You still haven't informed me why Midgardian magic users do that whenever you show off your Patronus," Loki mutters.
Evelyn tilts her head back so she can smirk up at her husband. "A corporeal Patronus isn't usually solid, darling. Not even Dumbledore managed that."
"I had no idea those of Midgard could call upon their soul guardians," Frigga comments, making Evelyn whip her head around to gawk at her mother-in-law in shock. The Queen smiles knowingly at Evelyn's unspoken question. "When traveling along the branches of Yggdrasil was more common, magicians would call out their soul guardians to ward off the dangers that lurk in the darkness." She tips head towards the stag. "You must be very close with yours for him to be solid as he is."
Now it's Evelyn's turn to choke. "It's my father," she whispers. Prongs, as she'd taken to calling her Patronus, nuzzles against her before stepping around the blanket towards Sirius who's staring with tears rolling down his cheeks. "He could shift into a stag just like that."
"I never—" Sirius' breath hitches as he reaches out a shaky hand. "I never knew—" He shudders when his hand touches Prongs' muzzle.
"You were a little busy getting your soul sucked out of your body to notice the first time I managed it," Evelyn points out when her godfather can't finish his sentence. "I was just relieved we both survived, so never actually thought to tell you about it later." She sucks in a deep breath. "You were right, you know. That night, what you told me before you flew off on Buckbeak." She waits until Sirius looks at her before continuing. "The ones who love us never really leave us. You can always find them in here." She thumps a hand over her heart. "I've always believed, ever since then, that Mum guards my magic and Dad my soul. It helped when things got rough."
When she sees that Sirius looks like he's honestly going to start crying, Evelyn sets down her own plate of food before curling up against him again. She lets Prongs fade away, for all that the stag is a warm, comforting presence. Evelyn figures that Sirius is a bit too raw at the moment. Her godfather crumples, wrapping his arms tightly around her as he shakes.
"I'm sorry, Eve, I'm so—"
Evelyn just sighs, deciding to wait until Sirius wears himself out before trying to say anything. This isn't what she'd intended to happen when she'd cast her Patronus. Mercifully, no one tries to break the moment, and Evelyn even feels a mild muffling barrier courtesy of her husband rise up between the two of them and everyone else. She'll have to thank him for that later.
When Sirius' tears and shaking have subsided, she digs out a hanky she never got out of the habit of carrying—because Teddy was the child of a Marauder through and through, necessitating many a clean up during his younger years—and offers it to her godfather. When he opens his mouth again after blowing his nose, Evelyn immediately cuts him off.
"You've apologized enough, no," she informs him. "You didn't do any of what happened on purpose, so I need you to stop blaming yourself for it. I'll beat it into you if I have to." Age and distance helped her heal from a good deal of her childhood traumas. Having raised Teddy, she also somewhat understands Sirius' actions that Halloween night. She has Black blood in her as well. It can be an all consuming siren call when ignited. There's a reason the Wizarding World once feared the wrath of House Black.
"You're too good to me, Prongslet," Sirius chokes out.
Evelyn snorts. "Quite a few people would protest that statement, but I don't care for their opinions. Never have, never will. Now, are you still good for company or would you rather leave?"
Sirius barks out a bitter sounding laugh, wearily scrubbing a hand over his face. "While I'd love to stay, I think I'm about to keel over, and I'd really rather not do that."
"Alright then." A brush of her magic has the barrier dissolving away. She turns to face her mother-in-law. "Frigga, is Eir expecting Sirius in the Healing Hall or is she coming here?"
"I informed her that we would come to the Healing Hall when returning the potion bottles," the Queen says. "However, we may call her here if that is required."
Evelyn looks back to Sirius. "Think you can make it there?" She knows a thing or two about male pride, but she's not about to let that get in the way of making sure he's okay. Especially since he just mentioned keeling over.
Thor interjects before her godfather can answer. "I will assist Sirius Black to the Healing Hall should he require it. Otherwise, I will simply lead him there." He sets aside his cleared plate, stands up, and then offers a hand to Sirius. "Will that work for you?"
Sirius' lips twist into a wry smile. "Yeah, should do." He places a hand into Thor's offered one and lets the man pull him to his feet. "I'll see you later, pup?" What should be a statement of fact comes out sounding like a question.
"Count on it," she assures him.
They're all quiet as Thor gathers up the empty potion bottles before he and Sirius walk away, Thor maintaining just enough distance not to be hovering but close enough to intervene should Sirius need assistance. Thanks to Tony, they all perfected that particular dance. Stupid idiot never did learn, either. Evelyn huffs out a sigh, pushing the thought away before she can depress herself further.
Once they're both gone from view, Frigga fusses over her while pressing her plate back into her hands. "Now then, sweetling, you never did finish telling me about this Remus Lupin and why exactly you wish to bring here to Asgard."
She stands at the infirmary bedside of the scarred and battered man out cold under the covers. It's the morning after the full moon three days after Sirius was sprung from Azkaban, and Remus Lupin is now safely in Asgard. His wounds are tended to and Eir assures her that he's sleeping peacefully. She continues to stare at him like she has been for the past couple of minutes, not moving.
"You're going to have to touch him."
Evelyn hisses out a breath through clenched teeth. "I know that!" She just barely resists the urge to whack her husband. She doesn't know exactly why she's hesitating. Oh, who's she trying to kid. Of course she does. She's very very worried that Sirius was just a flook. A one off and no one else is going to remember. Touching Remus will tell her if that's true or not, and she's not ready for that fear to be proven right.
And yet.
And yet until she does, she's going to be suspended in a stupid loop of worry and fear that she'd really rather not get stuck in. Just this once, she's going to bet on her Potter Luck working in her favor.
She reaches out and brushes her fingertips lightly over Remus' forehead. The instant they touch, the Soul Magic now deeply intertwined with her own magic flares into life and jumps from her to Remus. He sighs softly, but doesn't wake up.
"Well then," Loki murmurs, curling a hand over her shoulder and squeezing gently. "It looks like we'll be getting our family back after all."
Evelyn smiles widely through the tears she has to blink away. "Yeah." She sucks in a cleansing breath, willing her hand to stop shaking as she draws it back. "Yeah, it looks like we will."