He was going through the motions at this point, his mouth automatically forming the usual words he gave the wishers.
His heart, on the other hand, was in turmoil.
He felt her presence in every cell of his body, her spirit as soothing as a balm over raw wounds. And yet… there was a part of him that rebelled at the sensation.
She could never be Othánas now. And while this didn't bother him in itself, it did bring up his earlier concerns that she would feel isolated when she came to live Below. His instinctive desire to see her happy warred with the reality that this was a pain she would be unable to avoid. A pain that he could never alleviate.
And then there was… the wish she'd made. It ate at him, roiling his gut with confusion and (on some level at least) disdain. How was he supposed to love someone who would do such a thing?
Resolutely, he shoved his doubts aside, intent on finishing this little charade. He conjured a crystal, sweeping it between his hands with confidence born of long practice. He saw her eyes following the movement of his hands, but she didn't seem to be looking at the crystal itself. Curious, he glanced down.
Her dreams… her wish… was for her mother.
Thoroughly revolted now, Jareth saw the dream this girl had… that her mother, who had left their family and tossed Sarah away, would come back and take her… take Sarah to live with her… in an environment so jaded, so treacherous… it turned his stomach. He'd only seen her mother in person once, when he'd marked Sarah for the Goblin Kingdom. And that one time was quite enough. He could only imagine what sort of person Sarah would become if left in the care of her mother…
And this was his future Queen?
The movement of his hands was mesmerizing, the light coming off the crystal bathing her in a scintillating glow.
Some instinct told her not to look in the crystal itself. He said it contained her dreams… but Sarah was afraid. Afraid to see what those dreams actually were.
Dreams.
Her mind flew back to that day, that terrible day when her mother left.
"You killed my dreams… and now I'm going to take them back."
Her mother's words were as sharp as any blade, cleaving Sarah's heart in two.
Linda Williams wanted her dreams… so much so that she tossed away the man she'd sworn to honor for life. Tossed away her own daughter. All to pursue… what? Fame? Fortune? Couldn't she have had that and kept her family? Why throw them away?
And… now she had the same choice. Throw her brother away, and she could have her dreams. What were her dreams? What did she want? What was worth never seeing Toby again, never feeling his little arms around her… never seeing his smile when she came into the room…
You sick bitch, she thought to herself with rising disgust. Toby loves you… looks up to you… trusts you to protect him, and you would throw him away for… what?
That thought brought a flood of other thoughts. She cringed when she recalled the 'story' she'd told him earlier…
"So, one night, when the baby had been particularly cruel to her, she called on the Goblins for help."
Cruel? How the hell could Toby be cruel to her? He was just a baby… frightened by the thunderstorm… if there was any cruelty here, it was her own.
And for what? Because he had Lancelot… a bear that had brought Sarah comfort in the past? Could she be so surprised that he would find comfort in it as well? Did the Earth shatter as a consequence of his putting hands on her bear?
What the hell is wrong with me?
The rest of the 'story' came to her… disjointed and sharp, like blades into her heart.
"And so, the girl suffered in silence. Until one night, when she was tired from a day of housework, and she was hurt by the harsh words of her stepmother, and she could no longer stand it…"
Day of housework? You spent the day in the park with Merlin, you idiot. And Karen…
Karen gave her no harsh words. Sure, she was disappointed that Sarah had been late, but she wasn't harsh. And this, after she'd charged into battle on Sarah's behalf, right there in the Principal's office…
Karen… Dad…
Despair welled up within Sarah's heart, clouding her eyes and distorting her vision. What kind of pain would that be for them, to come back and find Toby gone… never to return. What kind of agony would that be? How many times had she seen on the news, parents looking earnestly into the camera, their eyes hollow with grief and pain, pleading for the safe return of their child…
And Sarah, with her selfishness, had just sentenced them to a lifetime of excruciating hurt. And she'd be there to see it, every last second of it. She'd feel their hurt as well as her own.
And Toby… he'd have no idea why he wasn't home. Ripped from his parents who loved him… because his sister was a wicked bitch who couldn't think past herself. And he wouldn't even stay human… the story was clear that he'd be turned into a Goblin forever…
But… there was hope. The Goblin King had said that she could run the Labyrinth… and if she solved it… got to the castle before time ran out… Toby would come back home.
From the story, she knew that the Labyrinth was dangerous. There were puzzles and deadly traps. What chance did a fifteen-year-old girl have against something so… magical? Stepping into the Labyrinth was, in all probability, a death sentence.
Sarah raised her chin, meeting the eyes of the Goblin King with a ferocity that he clearly hadn't expected. Only thirteen hours to make it to the castle? So be it. Whatever it took, whatever the risk, she would run that Labyrinth and bring Toby home to the people who loved him.
Or die trying.
Author's Notes:
I needed to establish that Sarah really does love her brother, and she needed to have a wake-up call on her selfishness. She's fifteen… still going through puberty, really. I for one remember the absolutely irrational emotions I was subject to at that time (my mother joked that she thought I was possessed during my teen years). And while blaming Sarah's hormones is a bit of a cop-out, they certainly had a part to play in her emotional instability at the time.
Additionally, I wanted to tie in her feelings about her mother with what she had done to her brother, and to show that she really did think she was risking death to bring Toby back, but was willing to run the Labyrinth anyway. For his sake and not her own.
Also note her concern for the feelings of her father and stepmother. She doesn't know that Jareth and the Labyrinth erase the memory of the child in the minds of those around it, so as far as she knows… they'll have lost their son and will suffer the agony of it. This is a far cry from Julia's feelings back in 'Imitation Game', where her only concern was the punishment her parents would give her. Sarah's concern is strictly for the pain she was going to cause them, not the consequences to herself.