Disclaimer: I don't own Digimon.
Seeing Red
Chapter: 24
Renamon leaned on the tree trunk, arms folded together and azure eyes gazing at the school gate from behind her golden, faux-human bangs. Shame painted crimson on her cheeks as thoughts swarmed about her mind. Shame predominantly for her earlier breach of social norms.
There is still so much that I am not used to, she commiserated. Closing her eyes, she heaved a sigh. It had been innocent enough and no harm was done. It didn't change the fact that she had embarrassed Rika at a place she frequented for training. She should have waited for a more private moment to conduct her research. Perhaps even asked instead to use the family computer.
No, she decided after a moment of thought, and at once her shame deepened. It was likely that the situation would remain the same. After all, the whole family made use of the computer and, more importantly, Rika had pointed out to her that sites like the one she visited earlier could contain malicious programs. Who knew what could result if such a thing would occur?
Even if it's not like the digital world, the human world is dangerous in its own way. How do I fit in if I am so ignorant of their ways?
She found it rather ironic that, for all the private, intimate nature of sex that humans claimed it to be, they still chose to plaster as many forms of the act as frequently as possible online for the whole world to see.
Her ears twitched as she caught the sounds of movement headed her way. Turning, she saw a trio of teenage boys approaching her from the school.
"Hello," one of them said, a tall youth with a handsome face and sweptback hair. "You look like you're waiting for someone. Would you like some company?"
"Thank you, but no," Renamon replied simply, turning her attention back to the school. The three boys, from out of the corner of her eye, looked back and forth between each other, seeming to be taken aback.
"You don't have to be like that," began one of them, sounding a little irritated. The one who had spoken to her earlier, who stood at the forefront of the trio, held up a hand and immediately the other silenced.
Their leader?
"Sorry," the handsome boy said, holding out his hand apologetically. "I didn't mean to cause any offense. I'm Sota. Sota Nakamura." He offered Renamon a warm, comforting smile.
Renamon furrowed her brow slightly, wondering how best to proceed here. Deciding it was better to be polite than to ignore them and incur further complications, she shook the youth's hand.
"I am Rena…" She hesitated, wondering if she should tell them that she was a digimon in disguise. After a moment of deliberation, she said simply, "I am Reina."
"Nice name," Sota beamed. "I can tell that it fits you well."
"Do you?" she wondered aloud, drawing her hand back. She felt something tickle in the back of her mind and immediately recognized it for who it was.
Terriermon.
Sota's smile stumbled a bit and a touch of color crossed his cheeks. It struck her that he was used to complimenting girls, but not so much in explaining why he did so.
"Er, yes," he replied, shifting uncertainly. He gave an awkward chuckle. "You, ah, have that look about you. Like…" He coughed, then squared his shoulders before puffing his chest out a bit. "Like you're always looking out at things and thinking about them." He smiled. "It's in your eyes."
Renamon allowed an amused smile to touch her lips. His choice of words sounded rather rehearsed. Like something he picked up from a show or book.
"You have a way with words, don't you?" giggled a voice from up in the tree. The three boys jerked and looked around them.
"Who…?"
Terriermon promptly dropped down into view, his long ears holding him to the branch and his tiny arms folded together. Sota's eyes went wide.
"You're the digimon that belongs to that Henry kid!" exclaimed the other of Sota's friends.
"Actually, the word is 'partner'," Terriermon tsked, waving a finger at them. "Although it'd probably be more accurate to say that he belongs to me, now that I think about it."
"Hello, Terriermon," began Renamon, nodding in greeting. "When does Henry get out of cram school?"
Sota's eyes shot over to her at that.
"You-You know Henry?"
"He is my friend," Renamon replied. Terriermon snickered, earning him a dangerously sharp look from the kitsune digimon.
"I…see," Sota replied, clearly taken aback by this bit of news. Renamon wondered what the boy's relationship was with Henry and if it was a positive one. The youth's body language and scent confused the issue.
Before she could say or do anything further, more movement from the gate caught her attention. Turning, she saw Henry approaching, eyebrow raised and appearing rather alarmed. Pushing away from the tree, she started toward him. No sooner did she do so, Terriermon, using his ears like swing set chains, swung himself up and onto the top of her head.
"Terriermon…" Henry sighed. "What are you doing?"
Terriermon laughed. "I've always wanted to do this to Reina. Figured I'd give it a shot while I had the chance."
"And now that you've had your fun?" Renamon asked, drawing the rabbit-dog digimon off her golden head with zero difficulty.
"Now I have a fun memory I can replay and never have to do it again," Terriermon giggled before turning to Henry. "So, what do you think of Reina's getup today, Henry?"
"Reina?" Henry could only look baffled as Renamon handed his partner over to him.
"Yeah. You know, Reina. The foxy girl you've been friends with since you met me. Sheesh! Do I have to spell it out to you or something?"
Understanding finally dawned in Henry's eyes and he looked at Renamon more fully. A blush immediately started to form on his cheeks. Renamon took the moment to look him over as well. He was wearing a green blazer over a white, button-up shirt and tie. She had seen him wear it before for school. She supposed he looked good in it. She knew Rika thought Takato as being rather attractive in his school uniform. At the very least, Takato and Henry wore it better than others, but she couldn't see what the appeal was.
"She looks…nice?" Henry managed finally, to which Terriermon rolled his eyes.
"Henryyy… Are you kidding me?! That's all you can say to her?"
"I am forced to agree with the digimon," spoke up Sota with a hard look at the boy as he approached now. "This beautiful young lady was waiting for you to get out and you couldn't give her a proper compliment?"
With an audible groan, Henry glared down at his partner.
"I blame you for this."
"Momentai!"
"I would never fail to compliment a goddess such as you," Sota grinned, coming abreast to Renamon. "You are radiant. A sun from which the heart draws life from and without which the world would be a darker place." Reaching out, he brushed a finger against her chin. "So radiant…"
Renamon brushed his hand away.
"I believe that is enough," she said, her azure eyes darkening. "There are things that I wish to discuss privately with Henry. I do not wish to do so with you here."
"Wise up, guys," Terriermon grinned, climbing up onto Henry's head. "Crossing her is like messing with a kitsune."
"You don't get to tell us what to do, you stupid poodle!" shouted one of Sota's friends, but again, a lift of the youth's hand shut them down. Sota's smile was small, and his eyes never left Renamon's.
"It will be as you wish," he said. "Will I get to see you again, Reina?"
Renamon pressed her lips together before shaking her head.
"It would be best if you didn't. I already have a partner."
Sota gave a defeated laugh before shrugging. "Well, can't blame a guy for trying. Henry." He gave the half-Chinese Tamer a hard look. "Don't you dare break her heart."
With that, the boy started away and rejoined his friends. Renamon watched them go for a moment to make sure they weren't about to try anything else before turning back to Henry.
"I seem to have made quite the impression."
"Impression?" Terriermon laughed. "I'm surprised his pants didn't explode off him the second he saw you! Why were you even in human form to begin with? Not to mention being out in the open."
"Terriermon…"
"What? You got to admit, it's not like her at all."
"I guess I can't argue with you there."
"It is a valid question," Renamon replied. "I am trying to 'fit in' with human society. To do so, it's not enough to just look like you. I need to know how to interact with humans and their customs."
"But why do you feel like you have to?" Henry asked.
"Why would you even want to?" chimed in Terriermon. "You can go anywhere you want and not be noticed. Not to mention your favorite pastime is Rika-watching. I still found it weird that you went on a movie date with Henry."
"I cannot always be where Rika is, especially now that she is with Takato. Besides, it would be good to know something about this world and how to navigate it. Since I can blend in physically, there's no reason for me to not try. And since not all humans are comfortable around digimon, my being able to blend in would certainly be an asset to our group."
Henry rubbed the back of his head uncertainly. "Well, I can't fault your logic. I just…"
"Mr. Wong!"
The call cut across the air and all three heads turned to find a teenage girl around Henry's age running toward them. Renamon tilted her head to one side as she drew up, her breath coming up short, but even. She was plainly used to running, though her long, black hair, disheveled by her race, clearly was not. Smooth and straight appeared to be its natural state of affairs.
"Y-Yua?" Henry began in surprise. "What…?"
"Your cellphone," the girl interrupted stiffly, handing it out to the boy. Henry blinked, taken aback.
"Uh, thanks!" he stammered out, taking back his phone gratefully. The girl nodded with no more expression on her face than cold stone. Her eyes were likewise an icy blue and betrayed very little emotion. Sensing Renamon's gaze, the girl glanced at her. There, the kitsune saw a subtle shift in her brow. A slight disturbance in her otherwise smooth, pale skin. Renamon felt as though the girl – Yua – was assessing a threat. Instinctively, her hackles rose ever so slightly in response, though otherwise she remained calm. There was little danger from Henry's classmate to be sensed beyond what she perceived to be a simple, childish jealousy.
"I am Reina," Renamon said, bowing politely. "I am a friend of Henry's. I attempted to message him earlier about an important meeting, but he did not respond. As I was in the area, I thought I would drop by and see if everything was alright."
Yua blinked, not expecting this. The vulpine digimon sensed a shift in the girl's gaze. The assessing remained, but the hostility and suspicion lessened. It remained, but lessened.
"I see Henry has good friends," she said before returning to Henry. "See you next week?"
"Yeah. Thanks again."
Yua paused in her departure to consider Renamon again for a moment before heading off. Renamon pressed her lips together, concerned.
"Tell me about her."
"Yua?" Henry lifted an eyebrow. "I don't know anything about her really. We only met a few months ago because we were attending the same cram school." He gestured to the building behind him. "I see her every now and then here."
"I see." Renamon turned her eyes to the girl's retreating back. "She is strongly attracted to you. She may ask you out soon."
"Wait, what?" Terriermon rose up on Henry's head. "Seriously? Henry actually attracted a girl?!" He glared down at his partner. "You're as bad as Takato. How could you miss someone like her liking you?"
"I've been a little busy," Henry sighed. "Is there a meeting?"
"No. I felt it important to assuage your companion about my intentions toward you."
"Okay. In that case, why are you here then? I don't mean to sound rude, but seeing you waiting for me at my cram school is a bit out of the ordinary." He frowned slightly. "How did you even know where I went for cram school? Terriermon…"
"What? What are you looking at me for? I didn't say anything!"
"I chanced upon you arriving here once during my patrols and picked up on the pattern over the next few days. I am sorry if that disturbs you."
"No! No, it doesn't. It's just…different?" He scratched the back of his head again. "Suddenly, I feel like Takato."
"A common behavior for boys your age when near someone they consider attractive, as I've been given to understand." Renamon smirked playfully at the boy, who promptly blushed in response. Her smile softened a little a moment later, remembering her conversation with Rika.
"I had originally planned on walking you home, as part of my study on human relationships. It is common between human mates. However, Rika has given me some things to think about with regards to the nature of our relationship." Her expression changed, becoming apologetic. "I have not been fair with you."
"I-I don't understand." Henry shook his head.
"You and me both," Terriermon added. "Is it because of me? Because if so, I can go home ahead of you. I mean, it'll take me a while, but…"
"No, it's not you." Renamon held up a palm in a placating gesture. "Earlier today I was considering other areas of study, including sexual ones. But due to the intimate nature of such acts – of being in a relationship – I fear that I am in danger of hurting you, however unintentionally."
Henry's face was deepening in its color as he struggled to process what she was telling him.
"Apologies," she said. "Too much?"
"I, uh…" he began. His mind felt as though it had gone blank. Renamon had considered… No. She couldn't have thought about the two of us…
"Wait, wait, wait! Hooold everything!" Terriermon exclaimed, saying what was on his partner's mind. "You were thinking about having sex with Henry?!"
Henry's face burned as his blush darkened. For once, he was so stunned, he couldn't even rebuke his partner for his lack of tact or his volume. Renamon found she couldn't meet his grey eyes and glanced away.
"I had considered the possibility of such a thing occurring," she admitted. "But now I feel I have overstepped the bounds of our friendship. For that, I am sorry. I feel that, for the sake of our friendship, this experiment must end."
"R-R-Renamon…" Henry croaked, trying to rally himself. Sex. He hadn't even considered the possibility of such a thing occurring between them, nor had he thought Renamon would think of making an effort to try despite the massive differences between their individual biologies.
What do I even say to that?!
"Henry? Hellooo! Earth to Henry! Renamon, I think you broke his brain saying you were thinking about doing the mattress dance with him."
"T-Terriermon!" Henry exploded, his ears starting to darken now.
"There. At least that shook you loose."
"Henry, are you alright?" Renamon asked, her voice and eyes full of concern. Taking a deep breath, Henry attempted to organize his thoughts.
"I-I don't know what to say," he admitted. "H-Honestly, I feel as though I'm a computer stuck in a boot loop."
"Perhaps it would be best that nothing more be said then," Renamon said, feeling sympathy for him. "I thank you for helping me with my studies. I hope that I haven't offended you or hurt you in any way, and that we can still be friends."
"I-Renamon." He shook his head, desperately trying to force his brain to catch up with the conversation. "Renamon, you haven't offended me. I'm just surprised, that's all." Looking up, he locked eyes with the kitsune. "Of course, we're still friends. I just need some time to process this. I'm sorry. I just…"
He trailed off, once again at a loss for words. Renamon considered having sex with him to learn about it?
"Can we talk about this?" he asked finally. "I'm sorry, I just feel like I need this broken down for me."
"What's there to talk about?" asked Terriermon. "She thought about banging you, and then thought it might be a bad idea. What're you getting hung up about?"
"I'm not sure where to begin with that..."
"Yeah, you're really out of it. Usually just saying my name is fine."
"T-Terriermon!"
"There we go. Come back down to Earth, Henry. Come back down to Earth and momentai."
"Perhaps it would be best if we have it at a later date," Renamon suggested. "I can see how this has unsettled you."
"Unsettled doesn't even begin to describe it!" Terriermon said. "I haven't seen him like this since…"
"That's enough, Terriermon," Henry interrupted. Lifting a hand to his face, he drew in a deep breath. The cobwebs were breaking down. He felt a sense of order returning to his thoughts. "I'll be fine, but I think it would be better to talk about it now rather than later. Otherwise, this is going to be bothering us both."
Renamon tilted her head to one side, weighing his words.
"Very well," she agreed. "Somewhere else, I assume."
"Y-Yes," Henry agreed with a vigorous nod of his head. "Definitely."
Terriermon looked back and forth between the two with concern. The expression was shared between Henry and Renamon for very understandable reasons.
What am I supposed to do here? he wondered. Like Renamon and Guilmon, humans at times mystified him, and as his partner grew and matured, so did his confusion. He wanted to help, but there was so much about the human maturation process that lay far outside his experience. He could make a connection between the process of puberty operating like a slower version of digivolution. Love he could understand as well, but things like sexual desire and the act of sex itself? He could admit to seeing the aesthetic appeal but otherwise all it helped him do was make fun of his partner as well as Takato and Rika, who spent years not admitting their obvious longing for one another. Helping Henry during these difficult years had been a struggle.
"I think we all need to take a moment to momentai," he said to them. Then he giggled. "I know a nice little restaurant you two could visit for a dinner date. And an ice cream shop that's just down the street from there."
"Terriermon…" Henry groaned.
"Momentai! At least I'm not suggesting a Love Hotel, right?"
Renamon eyed Terriermon with some amusement.
"You'll be our chaperone I presume?" she asked.
"Of course! How else will I find out how you were thinking of rocking Henry's world? Er, you are going to tell him how, right? Because I can't figure out what he'd be sticking it into when we don't have…"
"Terriermon!"
###
Rika opened her eyes to find herself laying in Takato's lap with his hand gently stroking her hair. She then closed her eyes again, squeezing them shut before reopening them. Her mind slowly took in her surroundings. The television was playing a different film from what she remembered seeing earlier. This one she recognized as being from one of the Gojira films, suggesting a changeout occurred some time ago. Guilmon lay in front of the TV, his attention glued to the screen and the tip of his tail tapping the floor in utter rapture. The scene in question involved what looked to be a redhaired American being escorted by a group of grey-colored humans wearing what looked like thin sunglasses and silver-black outfits. The ray guns they carried aside, their shoes drew her attention as they were curled at the tip, like the stereotypical images of Santa elves.
She found herself giggling at the absurd image of what was obviously meant to be an alien invasion.
"Attack from Santa's Little Helpers?" she asked sleepily. She felt Takato's leg stir beneath her and his hand paused in its stroking.
"Hey," he said softly, and she could hear the smile in his voice. "You're awake."
"How long was I out?" she asked. She didn't remember falling asleep. She felt rather bad about having done so.
"A while," Takato replied. "You were out like a light halfway through the movie we were watching and, well, I didn't want to disturb you."
Much to her surprise, Rika looped an arm about his waist and snuggled up closer to his belly.
"Smart choice," she giggled. "So, what one's this?"
"Invasion of Astro-Monster. It's kind of the sequel to Ghidorah, the Three-Headed Monster. It's one of Guilmon's favorites."
"I bet." Sighing, Rika closed her eyes and relaxed against her lover-boy. She felt quite relaxed and at ease now. Once upon a time, she would have considered it strange to feel that way in close proximity to Takato, but not so now. The same appeared to be true for him as well.
We're getting better, I think, she thought. We're putting all the weirdness behind us and getting back to where we were. She gave Takato's waist a soft, loving squeeze, appreciating his closeness. His thumb stroked her cheek gently in response. She found herself wishing this moment could last forever. It was not to be however, as already thoughts about the digi-egg they created together began to intrude on their quiet moment.
What are we going to do about it? We've got to think of something. Are we just going to let it be or…?
Her thoughts trailed off and she shifted uneasily at the what-if she wandered into.
"Hey, are you okay?" Takato asked, sensing her mood-change. Rika made an annoyed, grumbling sound.
"Yeah," she pouted. "Just waking up and enjoying all the stupid I wasn't thinking about while I was asleep coming back to bother my brain. How about you?"
"My brain's been pretty wired thinking about stuff. A whole lot of worrying."
"Worrying is one of the things you do best." With an amused hmph, Rika hoisted herself up so she could look at him more closely. Their eyes met, and she could see in him the twists his brain had been taking in its journey to knot itself up. Lifting a hand, she brushed his cheek.
"I'm thinking that I should get birth-control," she said. "After what we did today and what we keep getting close to doing, it's probably a good idea."
She saw crimson begin to form in his cheeks. Reaching up, he took her by the hand and squeezed it gently.
"Well, you know best about that. I'll, uh, see about my end on that too. Hey, how come you weren't on anything before?"
Rika looked away, feeling uncomfortable. "The first time I used birth-control, it made me feel weird," she admitted. "Like I was sick or something. I didn't like it, so I dropped it."
"Was it just the pill?"
"Yeah. And I know there are other methods, it's just…" Her nostrils flared a little. "I didn't like the idea of an IUD when Mom was first telling me about it. She says it's easy to put in, easy to remove and is supposed to be really good. All I could think of when I was looking at the charts was that it looked like I was getting stabbed." Her lips twisted with discomfort. "It's pretty stupid thinking back on it now, but the whole thing just looked bad and I didn't want someone I didn't know messing around in my insides."
She remembered her visit to the doctor's office when she was fourteen and having the procedure explained to her. The mental image of herself, legs spread open and supported by stirrups while the doctor inserted a speculum to widen her vagina for the IUD's insertion had been an unsettling one to say the least. The idea of cold hands wearing rubber gloves poking around her insides and the little detail of cramps and discomfort during the procedure only made it worse. An oddity, to say the least from someone who often said that a 'Tamer doesn't walk away from danger' but that had been a strange time for her. Strange and frightening. Leaning her head back, she thought about the sort of person she had been at fourteen. Puberty being so new to her she had almost been in denial of it in spite of the bleeding and the growing of her breasts. She had taken to wearing baggy sweaters for a time and even grown a touch more hostile to all except Jeri and, to a lesser extent, Takato.
I was a lot more afraid back then, she thought. She knew it would sound strange to someone like Takato, who often saw her brave side, but change often frightened her. In the last few years, one change after another had been thrown at her. As soon as she had gotten used to the idea of having friends and having them come over to her home, she found suddenly herself going through puberty, seeing how that impacted the behavior of the boys she was friends with who were likewise going through their own changes. And on top of that, discovering she was in love with Takato, whose eyes were, at the time, focused on Jeri. And although she felt it said something positive about him that her maturing body didn't affect him the way it had Kazu, there were rare moments where she cursed her puberty for giving her all the attention she didn't want except from the boy shedesired it most from.
And it frightened her that she wanted his attention at all.
Why does everything have to be so complicated? she wondered, giving Takato's hand a return squeeze. Why can't it just be enough for the two of us to love one another without anything else? Why does there have to be all this other stupid stuff involved?
Of course, she knew the answer to that question. She just didn't like it.
The buzzing of her cellphone broke her train of thought. Releasing her grasp on Takato's hand, she took it out and checked her messages.
"Great. Mom's wondering where I am. Apparently there's something she needs to talk to me about. Knowing her, she'd rather do it in person than over the phone."
Takato made a disappointed face, but otherwise said nothing. Guilmon, for his part, said what went unvoiced.
"Ohhh, you're going already? But it was getting to a good part!"
"Sorry, Dinoboy," she shrugged. "I'll have to catch up with your space monster alien invasion another time." She turned to Takato and offered him a wan smile. "Catch you later?"
"I'm fine with tagging along," he began, only for Rika to shake her head.
"Thanks for the offer, but I need some alone time now to think about things. We'll catch up."
His disappointed look returned, but he nodded in understanding. Not liking his expression and desiring to leave him off with something a little more upbeat, she leaned forward and kissed him gently on the lips. Almost at once, she felt the heat from before, cooled but not burned out, flare inside her and she unexpectedly deepened the kiss. With considerable effort, she pulled back and gave his blushing cheek a light, affectionate pat.
"Don't get into any trouble while I'm gone," she giggled. "Later."
"Ah…" Takato began, blushing a little. Lifting an eyebrow, Rika turned back to him, feeling a little annoyed by his delaying tone.
"What? Do I have something on my face or something?"
"Your hair." His blush deepened and his lips twitched into a smile. Rika felt confused for a moment before remembering he had undone her ponytail during their earlier make out session. Sweeping it up with one hand, she quickly tied it back up.
"Thanks," she smiled. "Catch you later."
Takato accompanied her to the side door leading to the alley, where he watched her depart. And there he remained for some moments, collecting his thoughts.
This has been…a weird day. Actually, scratch that. Not weird. Just different. Bigger. It's like… It's kind of like when Guilmon first digivolved to Growlmon, I think.
He sighed mentally. Bigger. That sounded as about an apt description of their most recent forays as one could get. While she slept, he replayed the memory of their making out, the feel of her breasts in his hands while her fingers squeezed and massaged his penis. He sensed an aching desire within her touch, noticeable by the slightest of tremors. A desire to do more than what they were currently doing, but held back only by a fear of what might happen if they went further. He had sensed it the last time, back in her room when they came close to making love for the first time. That fear he sensed from her held him back then, not wanting to do her any harm. He had come close to doing the same today, but that need he saw in Rika's eyes to know something about the act had made him reconsider.
What was it that she needed to know? he wondered. A part of him had an idea. That it was related to the digi-egg their love created was obvious, but he had a sense that there was more to it than just that. The answer, unfortunately, eluded him for the moment.
"Takato? You okay, son?"
The boy jumped and whirled about to find his father looking at him quizzically from behind him. Blushing, he smiled goofily.
"Y-Yeah," he stammered out. "Just thinking about, you know, stuff. Things. And worrying."
"Uh, huh. Does that worrying have anything to do with that bruise on your neck?"
Takato's already red-stained face darkened at that. That's right. She bit me.
His hand drifting up to his neck where the bruise lay, he massaged it with an awkward smile.
"Kind of. A little. I think." He shook his head. "Sorry, Dad. I'm not really sure what to think right now. I'm feeling a little out of my depth here."
The memory of Rika leaning into his neck flashed through his mind, spiking a sudden feeling of electricity buzzing all along his nerves. He had been so worked up then, his mind clouded with hormones and pleasure he could barely think much further than her hand pumping his penis while his squeezed her chest. He felt her breath tickling his skin and a sense of losing control flashed through him. All it took was a single push to send him over the edge. That push came a second later with the feel of her teeth breaking through the fog, pressing hard against his vulnerable, naked flesh. It had been like something shocked him and then pleasure exploded within his body, pounding and pumping in every vein and sparking along every nerve. His whole world, centered around her presence. Around her and what she was doing to him.
In so many ways, he still couldn't believe that today had happened. He kept waiting to see if he would wake up from a dream at any moment.
"I'd say she definitely likes you." Takehiro gave his son a questioning look. "It didn't go any further than that, did it?"
"Ah…" Takato coughed, the heat in his face going up threefold. "W-Well, we didn't-didn't have sex." His voice croaked on the last word and embarrassed he hastily looked around, remembering that although he was in the living section of the bakery still, there remained the possibility of customers overhearing them.
"But it went further than just kissing," Takehiro pressed. Swallowing, Takato nodded reluctantly.
"S-She just wanted to-to know what it looked like!" He shifted uneasily. "You know. Um, how I, I do…things?"
"Things?" Takehiro's eyes demanded an explanation. Takato suddenly conceived of a desire for a hole to abruptly appear underneath him as embarrassment flooded his whole body.
"L-Like how I-I…masturbate." He said the last word quietly, feeling his heart sinking into his stomach. With an effort, he looked at his father, feeling heat wash over him. Thinking about Rika however helped him. He hardened his heart, not wanting to fail her in his attempt to explain her reasons for wanting to see him masturbate.
For his part, Takehiro looked at his son with worry, but at the same time he felt nostalgic. It reminded him of when he and Mie had started courting one another; learning about one another's bodies and how to best please each other. There had been an innocence then, and a certain clumsiness and excitement over how new it all was. At the same time, he found himself remembering his wife's earlier concern about Rika's apparent maturity when compared to Takato.
"She's not pressuring you into anything, is she?" he asked. It sounded absurd to say that, having known the girl for some years now, her closeness with Takato and the respect she had for his family, but relationships had a way of changing people.
"N-No! It's nothing like that!" Takato protested. "It's…" He scratched the back of his head. "It's because of all that stuff that happened with our digivices. Remember that digi-egg they created? A-And everything else that happened because of how they got all twisted together and had us dreaming about one another?"
Takehiro nodded, remembering their conversation and how upset it had made his son. "Yeah, but I'm not sure that I follow."
"Yeah, I know," Takato agreed. "It sounds weird hearing it out loud, but I just know she felt she needed to know something real first and it's connected to that digi-egg. It's like it's all related somehow. Like… Like…"
Takato frowned, feeling as though he were on the cusp of discovering what was on her mind. He thought back to when he first created Guilmon. His partner was strong, but at the same time so very vulnerable. Everything about the world was so new to him and he had to have it all explained each and every step of the way.
Like a baby.
Just like that, something clicked.
"That's got to be it!"
"Uh, what's it?" Takehiro asked.
"That digi-egg! She's worried about its partner!"
"Didn't you say that it didn't have a partner?"
"Yeah! Because it's not a full digimon for some reason! She…" He blinked, the words cramming to a halt inside his throat as the implications hit him like a truck. They didn't know who the partner was. For all they knew, its partner hadn't even been born yet.
Is that why it hasn't formed a digi-core? Shibumi once said something about digimon and humans being made for one another. Is that why she wanted to see me e-ejaculate? To see… To see… To see what came out of me? My sperm?
He clenched his eyes shut, struggling to hold it all together in his mind. Images of his ejaculate in her hand. Their passionate kisses. Her stroking of his member as she brought him to orgasm. The digi-egg and finally the imagined cry of a child. The weight of it all bore down on him and he felt as though he were sinking in mud from it. In his mind, he saw Rika gazing at her sperm-coated hand, her eyes deep in thought. What was on her mind?
What we almost did, came the answer. What she had told him before. What we could have made if we weren't careful. A baby. And maybe that digimon's partner.
Takehiro's hand falling onto his shoulder snapped him back to reality.
"Ah! Hu-wha…?!"
"Sorry, but you suddenly looked like you were somewhere else," Takehiro said. "Takato, what's going on?"
Takato was silent for a moment before replying.
"It's nothing, Dad. Well, actually, not nothing. More like a lot of somethings, but…"
He trailed off, failing to alleviate his father's worries and finding himself at a loss for words. Takehiro regarded him with deep concern. He opened his mouth to speak, but Mie's call from the register cut him off.
"Takehiro! Could you have Takato restock the pastry section, please?"
"Well, there's your marching orders," Takehiro sighed. "We should talk later when we're not so busy."
"Sure," Takato nodded numbly, causing his father to look at him worriedly again. Takato's distracted response was a sign of the turmoil in his mind. But the boy moved all the same without difficulty, muscle memory directing him to their stocks. Takehiro watched him go for a moment before heading back into the kitchen to check on the oven.
###
A baby. Is that what Rika's thinking about?
The thought went round and round inside his head as he stocked, half-paying attention to the world around him. It made sense, now that he thought about it. Rika had a lot more to worry about with regards to that sort of thing than he did. He couldn't get pregnant, but she bore that risk. It most certainly would be on her mind. How it connected to the digi-egg somewhat eluded him, but he knew the connection was there.
It's a digi-egg we made but a digimon hasn't been made in it yet. And Shibumi said digimon and humans are made for one another, so who was this one made for? Is Rika thinking it's for one that doesn't exist? A partner we might make if we have sex?
His thoughts were starting to feel feverish and sticky; the logic becoming less sure of its footing in his mind. He needed to talk to Rika and sort everything out.
If-if she is thinking along those lines, what can I do for her? How can I help her? I can't just let her deal with this on her own. I have to do something!
Realizing that he was starting to forcefully stocking the pastries from the intensity of his thoughts, Takato gave himself a brief pause to calm himself.
But…can I help her? Am I good enough to help her with something like that?
He finished his work and stepped out of the customer area. His eyes fell on the home phone sitting on the countertop. Rika had her cellphone. She was just a call away. He started toward it, only to hesitate with his hand hovering above the receiver.
She said she needed some time alone to think, he thought. A part of him struggled against that, but he understood that was just the sort of person she was. She needed to know something and think about what it means. And so do I.
That was the hard part. Talking to others was usually how he understood things and, by extension, help others. On this, he and Rika tended to differ.
She'll still talk to me when she's ready. I have to be ready for when she is. I just need to figure out how to be ready.
Life, he decided, was very complicated.
###
"Renamon? Are you with Henry right now?"
"Yes, Rika. But I can leave at any moment. Is something the matter?"
"No. I just wanted to check in on you. How is everything going with him?"
"I am unsure. It is complicated to answer right now. I have ended my studies with him, but I am uncertain as to his reaction. I fear that you were correct in your warning."
"You didn't hurt him, did you?"
"As I said, I am unsure. I feel I have certainly confused him. I would like to speak with him more to make sure, but if you need me…"
"No. Take care of him. Just…not in that way, okay?"
"Very well. And did things go well between you and Takato?"
Through the mental link they shared, Rika thought back to her time with Takato. Images and sensations flickered between them; Takato's hands caressing her chest beneath her shirt. Her fingers against his smoothness and the wet heat filling her hand. His gentle touch upon her hair while she snuggled against his belly.
"I see," came Renamon's reply. "It seems you have a lot to think about."
"Bit of an understatement there, Renamon. Catch you later?"
"Always."
She felt Renamon becoming distant now, returning her attention to Henry. For the first time since the digimon were forced to return to the digital world all those years ago, Rika felt a sense of loneliness surround her.
Stupid, she thought, kicking at the ground. Renamon would have come if I told her to. Takato would have followed me if I said I wanted him to walk me home. So why do I feel like the opposite?
She sighed, turning a corner. That answer, of course, was obvious. Being alone helped her think a little better. Without the distractions of people constantly asking if she were alright or looking to her for something to happen. She felt more at ease to think things over and come to terms with them.
I masturbated Takato and he offered to do the same to me. She could still clearly remember the feel of his semen in her hand and on her forearm. The sense of potential in that cloudy, milk-white liquid had been overwhelming to her, leaving her to wonder why she hadn't thought of it before. She had always been cognizant of the risk of pregnancy. In many ways the absence of her father and how young her mother was as a parent made her more aware of that fact than others in her age group. But it wasn't until she held Takato's sperm in her hand that she saw how huge it was.
Data. It's human-making data in liquid form. And if Takato shot that into me, the chance is there that it might make a person.
She wasn't sure how she felt about that. How did Takato feel about that? She wanted to kick herself for not asking.
Well, he said that he thinks it'd be the coolest thing in the world to see a digimon be born and knowing that we helped make it. Maybe he'd feel the same way if we became parents.
That sounded like him. She guessed she couldn't fault him for feeling that way. Making life seemed like a powerful experience. She looked down at her belly, trying to imagine it changing; growing from a life inside it.
What would a kid from the two of us look like?
A blush crossed her features, trying to interpose some of her features onto his. Ruffled, messy, red hair and violet eyes. A smile that never seemed to quit. Much to her surprise, she found herself imagining such a child at the age of five, hugging her legs with the same, goofy grin that Takato often had when he was excited about something. She picked up the pace abruptly at that. Nothing but uncertainty filled her thoughts.
This is becoming a little too real now.
Time passed and the sun dipped out of the afternoon and into the beginning of evening by the time Rika arrived home. Kicking off her shoes, she looked about her.
"Mama?" she called.
"Over here, Rika!" came the answering reply. Following her voice, Rika strode over to the side room her grandmother sometimes occupied and found the blond-haired woman waiting for her. There, on the table, lay a batch of photographs. Rika pressed her lips together in annoyance.
"Not more marriage interviews."
"Hm? Oh, yes, they are. But that's not why I messaged you." Leaning forward on the table, Rumiko smiled. "Did you have a good time with Takato?"
"If I say yes, are you going to ruin it?"
"I hope not." Rumiko gave an embarrassed laugh. "But I am sorry to pull you away from him. I know how much you value your time together."
"Would you mind getting to the point, Mom?"
Hearing the frustrated tone in her daughter's voice, Rumiko gave her a sympathetic look. "Oh sweetie. I'm sorry…"
"Mommm…" Rika groaned with exasperation. "Things were fine. We just have some things to work out still because of that stupid digi-egg business!"
"Oh?" Rumiko tilted her head, remembering Rika telling her about the situation with her and Takato's digivices. "I thought you said your digivices had been fixed."
"Mom, I thought you wanted to talk to me about something else."
"Well, this does seem rather important, young lady and I think I'd be a bad mother if I didn't pay any attention to this. That digi-egg is still around?"
"It's not going away anytime soon," Rika grumbled. "Things are stupidly complicated."
Rumiko pressed her lips together, pitying the poor girl. "It's times like this that I wish I could be of more help."
"If a digimon attacks that's made of modeling data, you probably will be." Rika sighed. "Don't worry about it, Mom. It's…" A sudden thought came to her and Rika's back became straighter. "Actually, you might be able to."
Rumiko lifted her eyebrows, becoming very interested.
"Really? How?"
Rika blushed, starting to worry that she might have made a mistake by involving her mother. But as she thought about it, she saw that her mother was uniquely qualified to provide some answers to her questions.
"This'll probably sound weird," she began, struggling to maintain her cool.
"Rika, five years ago I couldn't have imagined that the game you played would become real or that you would help save the world with a talking fox. I think I've gotten a little used to things that are 'strange' now."
"Okay." Taking a deep breath to steady herself, Rika continued. "What was it like having me? Being-Being pregnant with me, I mean?"
Rumiko looked at Rika incredulously for a moment, wondering how this was connected to the digi-egg. She wanted to ask Rika if she were pregnant, not sure what else could have prompted the question. Sensing this, Rika shook her head.
"I'm not carrying, Mom. For goodness sake, I just took a test to make sure, remember? I…" She ran her tongue over her lips. Her lips suddenly felt dry. "I'm just trying to figure some things out. I don't know how to explain it, but that digi-egg got me thinking about things. About what it must be like being a mom."
Rika nodded mentally. That felt close.
"And Takato and I are stupidly in love, so I guess I just wanted to be a little less stupid. Takato raised Guilmon, so he knows something about it, but I don't know anything. I don't want to be the only one who doesn't know."
She frowned. That didn't quite capture her feelings on the matter, but that as best as she could properly relay them for now.
"I'm starting to feel like I don't know a lot of things."
Rumiko gazed at Rika for a moment before getting up from the table.
"Come with me," she said simply. Curious, Rika got to her feet and followed her mother. They headed down the hall and made their way to the dining area. Humming to herself, Rumiko approached the wine cabinet. Pulling out a bottle and a pair of glasses, she set them down on the table.
"Mama?" Rika asked, confused by what was going on. Popping the cork, Rumiko poured wine into each glass.
"Rika, if there's one thing I've learned about raising you," she began, the red liquid sloshing around the inside of the glass, "it's just how much I didn't know things that I took for granted. My mom knew things and I just went about my life thinking that I knew them as well because I was an adult. I thought being an adult meant that you knew things automatically."
She tipped back the bottle and the flow of wine slowed and then stopped. Picking up the glass, she held it out for Rika, who regarded both it and her mother with alarm.
"It's alright, Rika. It won't bite. I'll keep an eye on you. I promise, you won't be doing anything silly like, say, drunk calling Takato."
"Why are you giving me this?"
"I thought that if we're going to have this conversation, it might be good to give you a taste of what it means to be an adult. Plus, you and I could use a girl's night." She winked at Rika. "Just us and all the stories I have to tell you."
"Like drunk dialing boyfriends?" Rika asked, taking the glass tentatively.
"Drunk dialing your father actually." Picking up the other glass, Rumiko began filling it up to join her daughter's. "Mom said to me once that I was a lot like you when I was your age, but I don't know. As far as I know you've never been drunk before."
"I didn't see the point. It kind of looked stupid." Rika blushed. "Sorry Mom."
"Don't be," Rumiko grinned. "I think tonight we're going to be very honest with one another." Tipping back the wine bottle, she set it down. Lifting her glass, she clinked it against Rika's.
"Now, small sips and space them out. You're not used to this, so it'll sneak up on you if you drink it all at once."
"Uh, okay." Rika did as advised. The wine was warm and had a sweet, oddly spice-like bite to it.
"Well? What do you think?"
Rika shrugged. "It's okay. Not really my thing though."
"It's an acquired taste," Rumiko admitted with a chuckle. Sitting down, Rumiko took a sip herself. "But that's what being an adult is, I guess. An acquired taste. Something like this tastes sweet, but there's a roughness behind it. And it can do other things as well, if you're not careful. Make you feel good."
"Make you act stupid?"
"That too." Rumiko smirked. "I've made my fair share of bad choices after drinking."
"That doesn't sound like a thing just adults do," Rika pointed out, sitting down across from her. "I've done plenty of that."
"Hmmm… I suppose you have. But a good thing about wine? Age can make it better. Not always, but done right it's better than when you first make it. Your grandmother I'd say is wine that aged very well. Me, not so much, though at least I didn't go flat."
"I…see." Rika pursed her lips together, not sure if she understood or liked her grandmother being compared to alcohol.
Rumiko took another sip and leaned back in her chair. They were silent for a moment, Rumiko lost in thought and Rika waiting for her to speak, uncertain as she was in where her mother was going with her metaphor of growing up and alcohol.
"I remember when I first found out I was pregnant with you," she said. "I had just broken into my modeling career and found myself vomiting one morning for no reason. I honestly wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry. I was newly married to your father and our families were not happy about it. They thought I was too young and didn't like that I didn't care what they thought. All I knew was that I wanted to take the world by storm and be the best model around."
Swirling the wine in her glass, she smiled at Rika. "I guess that's one thing we have in common."
Rika's eyes softened. "Mama…"
"I knew I wanted a child too," Rumiko continued, "so I thought, why not? And if the company had a problem with it, I'd fight them too. Believe it or not, I got something of a bad reputation while you were growing in my belly. But I was good at my job. And so was your father."
"W-What did Papa do?"
Rumiko worried her lip at that and for an instant, Rika saw old pain flicker behind her eyes.
"He always made sure the world saw my best side," she said finally before giving a harsh laugh. "But we're talking about you. You gave me the strangest cravings you know. Purple potato ice cream. I've never seen you eat that once since I gave birth to you but you had me craving it all the time!"
"Sorry," Rika began, unsure what else to say. She wasn't used to her mother being this frank with her. Briefly, she wondered at how strong the alcohol was. She didn't feel anything herself, but she hadn't touched her glass since the first sip.
"Don't be." Rumiko waved her concerns off. "It makes for a funny story. You'll find that happens a lot as you get older. You learn to laugh at yourself more."
"Takato will probably end up doing that a lot," Rika said, her lips twitching a little into a smile.
"It's good to have a man who can make you laugh," Rumiko nodded sagely. "And one who can laugh at themselves as well. I think you made a good choice picking him. Takato, I mean."
"There's never been anyone else." Lifting her glass, she took a second, deeper sip.
"Hmmm… There were times where I wondered." Rumiko took another sip herself. "But moving on. You kicked a lot. Like you were impatient to get out. And you made me pee so much!"
Rika's eyes went wide and she nearly choked on her drink. "Wha…?!"
"Well, it's to be expected," Rumiko continued. "It's not like I had a lot of room inside and you were practically sitting on my bladder along with, well, everything else." She let out a giggle. "And you had to pee too, and there weren't very many options. I was like that for Mom too, so I guess what goes around comes around." She looked at Rika with concern as the girl started coughing. "Are you alright?"
"Y-Yeah! I'm just…" Rika covered her mouth and let out a particularly loud hack. "Shouldn't I be asking you that?"
"Oh, honey. I'm not drunk yet. This is only my first glass. I promised you a girl's night, and that's exactly what this is. Nothing held back, right?"
Rika scrunched her eyebrows together, not used to her mother behaving so frank toward her. In many ways, she felt as though she were talking to a mirror.
"Grandma said you were like me at my age?"
"Well, I didn't wear jeans and sneakers, but I guess I was something of a rebellious girl. Always spoke my mind even when I wasn't supposed to. Got me into trouble a lot with the family because I'd embarrass them."
"Hard to believe," Rika said through another sip.
"Harder to believe than a digimon being real?"
"No, I guess I can see it. It's just weird though. Sorry about the kicking by the way."
"Oh, don't be." Rumiko beamed. "Believe it or not, that's what got me motivated to work hard. That first kick especially…" Her smile softened as she lost herself in memory. "I think that's when I figured out that I was actually going to be a mom. I didn't know anything about it, but feeling your little feet hitting my belly, it was like a wakeup call for me. Like, you were really there. This tiny thing that I couldn't see, already so full of spirit. So small." Her expression became downcast and a tear brimmed at the corner of one eye. "You were so small. After I gave birth to you, that hit home too. How small you were. I couldn't believe it. When the doctors showed you to me, I wanted to hold you so bad and never let you go. But I couldn't. Not yet."
Rika blinked. "Because I was a month early," she said, remembering. Sniffing, Rumiko nodded.
"Your father had a hard time keeping me calm the entire time you were in the incubator. It didn't help that I saw you watching me and banging at it like you wanted out. Wanted to be with me." As Rika watched, her mother wrapped an arm around herself. Unconsciously, Rika found herself doing much the same, and memories of herself holding Calumon floated up into her mind.
I haven't seen Calumon in a while, she thought with quiet realization, and almost at once, even though there was nothing to worry about, concern for the little digimon caused her heart to ache.
"Sorry for making you remember that, Mom."
Sniffing again, Rumiko smiled. "It's alright. Sometimes it's good to remember even the scary times. It reminds me to appreciate people I care about and not take them for granted." Raising a fist, she bonked her knuckles against her head. "I sometimes find myself doing that. I guess that's the part of me that never properly became an adult." Lifting her glass, she indicated it with a gesture. "That's the roughness in the wine that makes up adulthood. It makes for a nice contrast and helps you appreciate the finer, smoother parts. The sweetness."
"So, which one was I?" Rika asked, tracing a finger along the side of her glass.
"Why, Rika. All of them. And don't go thinking your roughness is a bad thing. Even roses have thorns."
"Funny, Takato said the same thing to me once."
"Did he? In that case, I wouldn't him go if I were you." She took another sip. "Falling in love with someone is easy. Finding someone who understands you and accepts the occasional prick on your thorns is hard. Very hard."
Rika closed her eyes and thought back through the years of their relationship; the friendship they had before it blossomed into love. She had been so prickly back then. Making a point to run Takato down and demean him at just about every opportunity before settling into a cool, but tense civility that just barely acknowledged any kind of respect for him. The battles with the Devas changed her view of him, bit by bit, as did their journey into the digital world, where she followed him without question. And then, on the return journey home, after their biomerges occurred, she found him waiting for her. Risking being trapped in the digital world without his partner. He had been utterly irresponsible and stupid for doing so, yet she couldn't stop the smile from forming on her face when she discovered him in that storm, waiting and smiling back at her.
A year later, he had refused to let her drop off Locomon at her urging, even though it risked him dying with her.
Rika's lips pressed together tightly and she felt a sudden well of emotion surging up within her. Seeing this, Rumiko reached out and brushed at her eyes.
"Oh, see? I told you it could sneak up on you."
"I-I'm fine." Rika hastily wiped away the tears. "I guess this talk is making me realize what I've got now."
What Jeri gave up, she added with quiet realization. She wiped at her eyes again and found herself wanting to curse the puppet-loving girl for letting Takato go. She could have been so happy. Jeri, why would you let that stupid gogglehead go like that? Why let him go to be snatched up by someone like me? All I do is prick him on my thorns!
She knew the answer of course. If asked, Jeri would smile and tell her how she just wanted her friends to be happy.
"Stupid…" Rika sniffed and scowled at her drink. "S-So what did you want to talk to me about?"
"Hm? Oh, that." Rumiko gave a laugh. Rika stiffened, hearing the nervous twitter behind her humor.
"Mom," she said flatly, silently saying, tell me.
"All right, all right," Rumiko replied, leaning back in her seat. "I guess since you want to change gears like that, I have no choice. Will you promise to not get mad? Because it's your choice."
"This isn't about those stupid marriage proposals, is it? Because the answer's 'no' to every one of them."
"I wouldn't be wasting a perfectly good girl's night with you if it was about that," Rumiko chuckled.
"Well? What is it then?"
Rumiko sighed. "I guess there's no putting it off now. All right then. One of our models has come down with a stomach bug and won't be able to make their photoshoot. No one else is available either, I'm afraid."
"And you want me to fill in for them," Rika said flatly.
"Asking if you wouldn't mind. My agency is already familiar with you and you've done it a few times already. I promise it won't be long and I'm more than willing to make it up to you. Do you mind?"
Rika made a grumbling noise while she mulled it over. She was tempted to say no, but her mother's pleading face stood as a stalwart shield against doing so. Pressing her lips together, she wrestled with indecision before finally saying, "Yes, I'll do it."
"Thank you, Rika! I promise to make it up to you!"
Rika could only hmph in response, wishing she didn't feel like she was already regretting her decision.
A/N: Reina is a Japanese name that means wise. A lot of stories I've read in the past would sometimes call Renamon (or a Renamon) 'Rena' when looking to provide a way to disguise the fact that she's a digimon. I wanted to provide my own spin on it with something similar sounding but a bit off the beaten path.
Take care all.
-Crazyeight
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