I forgot to mention some good news in my last note. My oldest son, the one who has autism and was my inspiration for the Darcy in the Vindicating a Man of Consequence series, got his driving permit on Friday after passing the written test. This has been a long time coming. He did not do well at all in trying to take the test when he was 16, but for the past year (he is 18 now) he has been studying on and off. He took it three weeks earlier and didn't pass by two questions and then studied more and took it again and passed. This hard fought victory feels so sweet!

As today is one of our days in court, naturally I tossed and turned, and once I finally got to sleep, awoke at 5 am. But you, lucky readers, get the benefit as I was able to complete and post this chapter that much faster.

15.

Dear Mr. Darcy,

Jane suggested I address you as Bill, but it seems presumptuous as we are but acquaintances at best. I appreciate your taking the time to write and apologize. So few people make such an effort and I very much appreciate it. You have lovely writing and I believe your thoughts were expressed well.

Before I respond to the contents of your letter, it might interest you to know that on the very day that we saw you last, the three of us were already scheduled to have dinner with Chuck Bingley and his family in the city. They took us out for a very fine meal at an expensive restaurant, served on fine China and so many sterling silver utensils that I had not a notion of which fork was for what, and with fine linens that must have had a thread count to rival the best of sheets. I felt worried the entire time that I might spill or break something, was not willing to try the wine as I could imagine how I might tip over my glass and cause a large, purple stain.

As per usual, Chuck and Jane were seated next to each other and largely ignored us (not because they were trying to be rude, but because they are quite insensitive to any but each other). Mr. Hurst had a fine time by himself with a steady stream of bourbon shots being brought to him and Louisa mostly played with her bracelets between the very few bites of food she enjoyed. I don't think model thinness is worth the cost of getting to enjoy fine food.

I was seated across from an empty chair and prepared to merely enjoy my fancy meal which began with a lobster bisque and observe the interactions at dinner (it is not like anyone was making any effort to include me), which left Caroline to talk to Elizabeth. As per usual, they had trouble keeping the conversation going.

I know that Lizzy does not care much for Caro, thinks her snooty, spoiled and annoying; Caro for her part definitely looks down on Lizzy. However, both have been trying to make nice, knowing that they will have to tolerate the other, given that Caroline will become Jane's sister-in-law in a few months. After three false starts with conversational topics that went nowhere, Elizabeth finally happened upon one which captured Caroline's interest, namely discussing seeing you.

As you overheard what Elizabeth said about you before, it does not bear repeating now, but this was largely what she told Caroline. At first it appeared that Caroline wished to defend you, but soon enough she agreed with Elizabeth that you were arrogant, had a selfish disdain for others and cared for no one's feelings but your own.

Perhaps she had too much wine at dinner, for suddenly Caro got weepy and declared something to the effect of, "Bill Darcy used me very ill. He knew that I adored him, that I fancied myself in love with him, and one evening he declared his feelings for me, which soon enough led to me sharing his bed. I should have known better, for he was doing nothing but toying with me to fulfill his needs. He knew I would think we were an item, but he was more than happy to deceive me to get what he wanted at the moment, and had no hesitation in rejecting me most cruelly the next morning. Still, I am weak when it comes to Bill. Should he offer me an apology, I am afraid I would fall for him again."

I could tell that Elizabeth was not entirely convinced by Caroline's words. Perhaps she was recalling (as I was) how you always seemed most eager to avoid Caroline. But what Lizzy might have said I never heard for she had no chance to make a reply. Chuck seemed to be roused by the second mention of your name, for he stood up and declared in a booming tone to the room at large, "Bill Darcy is a liar and a jerk. He said the most awful things about Caroline."

It was quite odd to see Chuck so angry, his face flushed, his brows drawn, as he usually seems so pleasant and mild with an open look to his eyes. As he shouted, he gesturing wildly with his right hand, the one that has been in a black brace with the first two fingers held straight out since he got angry and "punched a wall," thereby fracturing those fingers (or at least that is the explanation we have long received). I did not like to see his anger, for I should never wish it to be directed at my sister.

Jane soothed him, saying "Whatever Bill did, this is hardly the time or place to discuss it," and he quieted then and sat down, but that was the effective end of the evening as when the waiter came and asked if we had any interest in dessert, Louisa and Caroline immediately declared on everyone's behalf that it was not wanted. I should have liked to try the raspberries and white chocolate mousse served in a chocolate molded piano with fresh whipped cream that I saw another dinner eating, but alas it was not to be.

During the ride home, Elizabeth said "I know Bill can be an arrogant prick, but I can't believe that Caroline's story was entirely correct."

Jane responded, "From having seen Bill today, and how angry Chuck became at the mention of his name, I am almost certain now that Chuck punched Bill. I hate to see people who used to be such close friends at odds. You can be sure that I'm going to talk to Chuck further about the whole thing and try to get this mess straightened out."

This all roused my curiosity as to what really transpired between you, Chuck and Caroline, but I expected that my curiosity would not be sated, for Jane and Elizabeth are quite close and tell each other everything, while I am often the odd man out. Thus, it meant more to me than you might know, to have me included in your letter.

By happenstance, we were all present at our parents' home later in the week when the letter arrived. Fortunately our father had gotten the mail and not our mother (or else she might have opened the letter for us, yes, she has in fact done that before). We all gathered in Elizabeth's room to read it, but before opening it Jane declared "I should tell you what I found out from Chuck. He did indeed punch Bill, but he thinks himself fully justified. He refused to tell me exactly what Bill said, but commented that it was highly demeaning and he felt the need to stand up for his sister."

Elizabeth wrinkled her brow and asked, "Well that just raises more questions about what that was all about. All I know is that Caroline always dresses like a high-class skank (if there is such a thing), while Bill always acts like he has a stick up his butt and like all women are beneath him. Still, some men are more than willing to take what is on offer. If I had to guess, they were both using one another."

I could tell that Jane and Elizabeth were just going to go back and forth in the usual pattern, with Jane convinced that no one was culpable, while Elizabeth would predictably find that everyone was to blame. However, I was more than ready to get to your letter to see if any answers lay within.

After a quick debate, it was decided that we would read it in order of age. Therefore, I watched as Jane read, eager to get some glimpse as to the contents through her reactions. She bit her lip once, looked thoughtful another time and muttered "of course he does" while glancing in Lizzy's direction. She read on and then scrunched up her forehead at another juncture. Near the conclusion of her turn, she remarked to herself "I must certainly do that" and gave a determined nod.

Then it was Elizabeth's turn. Unlike Jane, she had no compunction in making a running commentary the entire time, which seemed to mostly consist of doubting what you had written. She said things like "That may be enough to convince Jane of his sincerity, but not me," "that cannot be so; I am sure he has always looked at me to find fault," "how hard it must be too lose one's parents and to have all that responsibility of raising a sibling, too," "oh, that poor, poor deluded girl," "surely we should trust Chuck's judgment as to his sister," "can it be that he is implying . . . that must be an utter falsehood," "but to believe that Jane will ferret it out . . . he must be confident that he will be justified," "wow, to humble himself enough to admit he needs therapy? I never would have expected that of him," "I'm not sure I want to forgive him, but if all of this is true . . . ."

Elizabeth flipped the paper back over and seemed about to read the letter for a second time when Jane reminded her, "Lizzy, it's Mary's turn." You can imagine with what curiosity I picked it up, to find what had caused such reactions in my sisters. I read it rather slowly, determined to glean everything I could from it.

I think I was able to read the missive with more objectivity than the other two, as I am not to marry into the Bingley family and in you taking so little notice of me, I had no cause to ever be offended by your conduct, nor to think on it much at all. To be honest with you, I was surprised that you addressed the letter to me at all, since there was little that needed saying to me. However, perhaps you thought that in addressing it to us all that I might be the voice of reason for the others. If that was your intent, you have chosen well and with more discernment than Elizabeth would credit you with having.

After finishing your letter, I declared to my sisters, "Let's get to the heart of it. Bill accused Caroline of committing a crime against him, Chuck felt the need to sock him over it and Bill said she is a danger, the police mocked him for reporting the crime, and he wishes for Chuck to accept the truth and for Jane to know of it too so that others might avoid harm. What do you think he means by all of this?" I had my own suspicions, but was interested to see what they might say.

"Perhaps Bill misplaced something and thinks that Caroline took it?" Jane offered. I was not convinced that this was anything more than a meager attempt on her part to reconcile everyone with no real harm done.

"Why would the police mock him for reporting a theft?" Elizabeth responded. "Why, indeed, would that be bad enough for Chuck to punch Bill? It has got to be something worse than that. Mary, what do you think Caroline did?"

I was frankly surprised to be asked and said, "I will tell you my theory, but I don't think either of you will like it, though the pieces all fit. At dinner, didn't Caroline say that Bill Darcy took advantage of her? What if it was the other way around?"

I asked to see the letter again and found the part where you wrote about regretting not apologizing and "drowning my sorrows in the drinks Caroline supplied." I read that line to them and commented, "What if Caroline got Bill drunk and then . . . "

We were all quiet and somber for some moments when Elizabeth declared, "I remember going to that pool party at their house, how Caroline was trying to get Bill to drink alcohol and he wasn't having it. Her swimsuit, it obviously was not designed for swimming, indeed she seemed determined to tempt Bill with her 'assets' but he wasn't having any of it."

Jane chimed in, "I remember Chuck saying that Caro made the drinks too strong. I barely sipped the one she gave me."

I said what we were all thinking then, "I think she got him drunk the first time and then forced herself on him, and then was trying to get him drunk again."

They were stunned silent for several long moments and then Jane said, "If that is true, poor Bill! Abused by his friend's sister and then losing his best friend when he was honest about what happened. I have got to show this letter to Chuck and see what he has to say for himself."

I asked, "Do you really think you ought to do that? After all, it was addressed to us and not Chuck."

"Don't be silly," Elizabeth responded. "Of course Bill knows that Jane may share it with Chuck. That may be half the point of Bill writing to Jane in the first place."

I tried to reason with them about it, but both of my sisters were sure that would be okay, so I held no sway in this regard, and undoubtedly by the time you receive this letter, this will have already transpired. I am sorry about that. I was only able to delay this by a day, as I said we ought to write you back immediately, as that would be the mannerly thing to do, and I needed access to your letter to properly do that. To this my sisters agreed.

I have urged that indeed, they should write to you, too. After all the letter was addressed to all of us. However, Lizzy said, "Just sign my name, too" and Jane was non-committal about writing you back. I think it is likely that you shall not hear any reply from Elizabeth and if you hear from Jane it will be after she speaks with Chuck and has come to her own conclusions about everything.

Thank you again for your kindness in corresponding and clearing up our misapprehensions. Thank you for being so open with us all, even though there was really no need. Had you stayed in Chuck's circle of friends, I imagine that we might have become friends, too. I wish you all the success in the world in finding your sister and that things go more smoothly in your life from here on out.

Sincerely,

Mary Bennet