Life 2:5

Tallstar was leading beck his hunting patrol from a slightly less successful hunt than what they'd been experiencing since Snakepaw's arrival. They'd only gotten two from the burrow this time. The rabbits had dug a closer exit allowing for the escape. Regardless, two was still considered a good haul for a day of hunting. Snakepaw seemed nonplused by their lessening effectiveness from targeting the old Wander tunnels. They'd ranged pretty far today for their prey. Regardless, Tallstar still had to thank Starclan for allowing them to catch anything today. His eyes drifted to Silverpelt, naturally drawn towards the moon.

"Looks like tonight is the Gathering." Tallstar mewed, making idle chatter.

"What do you think they're discussing? Last thing I saw before coming here was that Brokenstar unsuccessfully raided Thunderclan." Snakepaw queried.

"Well, given what you've said, Thunderclan's probably demanding reparations or calling for war." Tallstar answered, ponderin the question himself.

"More than just I died in that raid. I'm leaning towards declaring war." Snakepaw commented offhandedly, as if it did not involve him.

"I don't understand how you can just dismiss your own death like that." Tallstar responded, now noting his apprentice's behavior more closely.

"Listen. I've died more times than I can count. I could probably rate the most pleasant to least pleasant way to go. In a way, I've become numb to it. I've experienced pain that I would never wish upon a mortal. I've felt fear beyond anything reasonable. I've been tortured to the point where my mind gave up on holding any semblance of sanity. Pain stopped meaning anything to me a long time ago. That isn't to say that there haven't been good times in my many lives. I've witnessed wonders you will never see in your lifetime. I've had the joy of witnessing my friends rise to greatness, watching their kits grow up into their own cats, and helping guide their descendants' paws. The things I've accomplished far outweigh any grief I have from this unending cycle. It's just, I find the most joy in saving another's life. If I have to play sacrifice, well, my life is worth less than theirs. I'll come back. They won't." Snakepaw answered, his voice sounding far older than his little body. In fact, to Tallstar, the voice appeared ancient and powerful. It was like how one would imagine one of the great cats of legend would sound.

Tallstar pulled himself up beside his apprentice, knowing that Snakepaw's statement couldn't go unaddressed. "Snakepaw, I don't want to see you waste your life and do something suicidal. Look at what you've done for Windclan since you arrived. You've saved us from starvation. I don't want you to just throw away your life when there are better options."

Snakepaw let out a chuff of amusement. "Trust me Tallstar, I'm not trying to kill myself. I don't plan to commit to anything risky unless I deem it necessary. The main point I was trying to make is that my life is just a resource in comparison to yours and the rest of the clan. I'm more expendable than they are. I recognize that my knowledge is valuable and that the clan values me, but I also recognize that I cannot compare the value of my life to another's because theirs is finite while mine is not."

Tallstar didn't know how to respond to that. From a logical perspective, Snakepaw was right, but at the same time, it felt emotionally wrong. How could someone live like that? If he were immortal, would he be the same?

Tallstar's thoughts were interrupted by Snakepaw's excited exclamation. "Look! Lightbugs! I haven't seen these in ages. I didn't think any were out here. They were much more common at the lake."

Tallstar looked at the glowing insects that caught Snakepaw's attention. He'd seen them before when he'd been with Jake. Lightbugs didn't really appear in clan territory. They ere certainly a sight to see, their soft glow like little dancing stars. Snakepaw had a bright smile on his face, dropping his prey to attempt to catch some of the insects. Tallstar could only shake his head at the kittish antics of the apprentice he knew was far older than himself.

Snakepaw, noticing Tallstar's hesitance to join, called out. "I bet I can catch one before you."

Tallstar gave off an amused smile. "I'm a bit too old to play a game like that."

Snakepaw gave his own cheeky response. "Too old or too boring? If anyone can pull the too old line, it's me. Now stop being a no fun kit scolder and join me." Snakepaw demanded in a kittish tone.

Tallstar let out a mirthful laugh. "I can't refute your argument. You're on!"

With that, Tallstar leapt at one of the glowing bugs surrounding them. Snakepaw did the same. Whenever Tallstar got close to one, Snakepaw would get under his paws and trip him. In response, whenever Snakepaw would get close to one, Tallstar would body block him. This quickly devolved into a playful brawl. What entertained Tallstar the most was that despite his physical advantage, Snakepaw had enough experience to match him. By the time they finished playing, the moon was already on the horizon, the night wasted on play, and yet Tallstar didn't regret it. It was nice to just escape the troubles plaguing his mind.

The duo returned to camp, slightly sore in their play. Both were covered in dust from rolling around in the dirt. Tallstar briefly worried that the camp would be upset at how little they brought in, but what he saw at the center of the camp assuaged his doubts. There were two rabbits already in the center. One of the other patrols must have had a successful hunt as well. The clan wasn't entirely dependent on their success after all.

Tallstar and Snakepaw took a couple moments to clean themselves after their day out. While Tallstar finished first, he moved to groom Snakepaw who seemed to be having difficulties reaching the spot right behind his shoulder blades. While it may have not meant much to another, Tallstar did note the small ridges of skin that were present beneath Snakepaw's pelt. He knew them well since he had some from his own growth. Snakepaw had stretch marks from his body growing so fast. It did puzzle him though. Snakepaw shouldn't have stretch marks if he went through the standard growth rate of a cat. He was properly apprentice sized, but in his own memories, he remembered last time Snakepaw had been in Windclan. The apprentice had been bigger than some of the warriors. Maybe this second growth spurt Snakepaw was destined to have explained his sudden clumsiness that he took as a sign that his life was soon to end. Tallstar put the thought to rest, resolving to pay attention to Snakepaw's growth as time passed.