CHAPTER TEN
Walk of shame
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After a while, when Jason recovers his breath, he finally takes his face off of my hair, and looks at me, stern. I'm smiling, but when I see his expression I get anxious, afraid that he'll be awkward again. I think he notices it, because he softly kisses my lips, to let me know we're good.
He looks at my hair, then back at my face, and starts to slowly caress my skin while he's still inside of me. He lazily looks at my body for a few moments. I realize that he's looking attentively at me because this will be a one time thing, so I do the same, and caress his body and his face, memorizing all that I can. It will be burned into my brain, definitely.
"I've never done this" I explain to him, so he understands that it's weird for me too. To have a forbidden relation, or secret relationship. He looks at me and nods, softly kissing my lips again.
"I don't want you to feel bad" I say, sincere. I truly hate the thought of harming him or his career in any way.
He swallows. "I don't. It's ok" he says, still softly kissing my lips.
I continue to look at him, while he grazes his fingers on me, and I'm overwhelmed by the thought that we'll probably never do this again, so I place my hands on his neck and kiss him deeply. He quickly responds to my kiss by pressing my waist with his hands, and while he's still inside and on top of me, I start to move, grazing my body against his, in slight waves. He stops our kiss when he realizes what I'm doing, but he keeps his forehead touching mine.
"Don't do this to me" he mumbles, with a shaky voice, but not even he believes his own request, because he immediately starts to touch my entire body with his hands.
He kisses me and stops, looking at me with a confused look, then kisses again, and I feel the urge to ride him. And not for his DNA. I need to get some control over him, because he's been driving me crazy so far.
The bed is narrow and one of the sides is against the wall, so I push him to his side and raise his torso, while kissing him, and I push him against that wall, making him sit there. He seems surprised and confused by my bossiness and eagerness, but he likes it, because he's getting hard again, and he kisses me back passionately.
I stop our kiss and stand up from the bed, standing still in front of Jason. Fortunately, only two lampshades are on and it's night, but I'm so aroused that I would probably do this even if it was broad daylight. He stares at me, confused, breathing hard, with his face and erection pink.
"I won't do this to you, Jason" I calmly state, serious, and wait. He stares at me, looking at me up and down, trying to understand my words. I explain them to him. "If you want to, I'll stop it now. I'll be ok with that".
This time, he understood, because his eyes widen. The message is clear, I want him to want me. I want him to invite me, like I did when I got into that alley. He came to my cabin but I had to give him a hint, and I'm sick of it. He just asked me to 'not do this to him', as if I'm the one forcing his hand all the time.
He keeps quiet, just heavily breathing, and I conclude that he prefers that we leave it like that, maybe it's easier for him to not prolong this. That's ok too, although disappointing. So I look at the floor, searching for my panties.
"Victoria" he harshly calls me, and I look up, his face is almost angry. He suddenly stretches one of his hands in my direction and grabs my butt, and squeezes it, pulling me until I'm knelt on the bed. "Are you kidding me?" he harshly says, looking at my face. "Come sit on me" he tells me, trying his best to not ask me, but asking in his own way, nonetheless.
I keep quiet and notice his loss of control, and I love it. I straddle him as a reward for finally making up his mind, or at least, telling me what's on his mind. He continues to heavily breathe while I stand still, and he squeezes my other buttock with his hand, looking at me with hungry and serious eyes and with expectancy. I rest my hands on his broad shoulders to get ready to sit on him, and he licks his lips.
Then both of our phones buzz. Our job is really demanding.
"Ah, come on" Jason almost yells at the phones, and he holds me in place when I chuckle and start to distance myself from him. "Hey, no, hey, I can be quick" he playfully says, holding me from the buttocks, inches from his erection.
"I can't" I inform him, with hungry eyes, and he swallows, now serious. I'm about to stand up but decide to kiss his lips, just in case I won't kiss them anymore, and I linger for a lot longer than I initially calculated, but I finally stop our kiss and quickly turn to stand up, so I don't have to look at him.
"I think Lisa got something" I tell him, trying to sound casual, while we put on our clothes in silence. "Maybe the name of the leader" I look up at him, lacing my boots, while he puts on his t-shirt back and gets his jacket from the floor.
"That would be great" he says, putting his jacket on and zipping it up, serious. "I should go first" he says, looking at me while I put on a bra, and of course I agree.
"Just wait" I gesture to him to open the door only after I finish putting my top on. If someone sees him leaving, and glances at me inside in my bra, that would confirm anything. I nod when I'm all dressed up, and he opens the door a little, and quickly closes it back.
"There's people" he states, alarmed, as if we weren't surrounded by people all the time in Camp Larkin.
I sigh, put on my camouflaged jacket, then grab two bottles of water and give one to him. "We'll leave together" I tell him, and he looks at me as if I'm going nuts, "we'll leave here normally and casually talking about the op or something else. You've been here a few times already, just like the other guys" he frowns, but I shake my head, it's not what he thinks, the team guys sometimes call me in my cabin, "and it's only, like, 2000 hours" I explain, and he looks at his phone.
"It's 2032 hours" he naughtily says, and I chuckle. He did last a lot longer than I thought.
"Come on, let's go" I tell him, and I walk out, drinking my water, while he tries his best to look casual, but apparently that means to walk slowly, all joyful and smiling at random people. Something that I never saw him do, once.
"Jason, please look grumpy as you always do, ok?" I quietly ask him, and he immediately puts on his bad boy face.Now, he's looking like he always does while walking around Camp.
"Man, I'm hungry" he suddenly mumbles, feeling truly grumpy now, "I hope we don't have to leave for another op right now" he says, "it would be my fourth today. I need food" he complains.
"Sorry for keeping you up" I tease, smirking and looking at him, and he shyly smirks, not looking at me. "If it's the leader, we'll probably plan for a little longer" I explain, and he nods. We pass by another building being dismantled, and it's really weird seeing people leaving Camp and watching it slowly fade away. "This draw-down is so weird for me. I can't imagine how it is for you".
He looks at me, serious. "That was the place where JD had his room" he points with the bottle of water where the building was dismantled, "and I know this Camp too well. Many memories here. This draw-down's wrong" he explains, and I nod, agreeing. It must be hard to watch.
We get inside the Command Center and everyone is already there. Jason keeps his cool bad boy face when everybody turns to us, like asking where we were, but I just say "shooting range", and everyone seems to believe it, except Lisa, that tries to hold a smirk. And Ray, I notice. He gives Jason a stern look, but Jason ignores him.
Lisa and Blackburn tells us the big news: they found out the name of the leader of Tahara. It's Azfaar Al-Hazred.
"Is there any chance that he's related to Asim Al-Hazred?" Ray asks, suspicious, glancing at Jason too, and Jason seems alert, I notice.
"By any chance, yes" Blackburn answers, stern. "Azfaar is Asim's only son".
Ray and Blackburn turn to Jason, and his face just shuts down.
"The biggest op of anyone's career. Killing Asim" Ray explains, but all of us know who Asim Al-Hazred is, and all of us stare at Jason. He's squirming.
"The shot that made Captain America famous" Blackburn adds, cautiously looking at Jason too. Jason looks incredibly uncomfortable, and with absolute reason, because he's the Seal that shot Asim Al-Hazred more than a decade ago, when he was still Bravo Three. That shot made him Bravo One.
"Azfaar has his father's last name so he gets the support of the guys from the old guard and traditionalists. But he is absurdly wealthy and is supported by the new generation too" Lisa explains. "He's already recruited thousands of children and teenagers from more than a dozen countries".
"Children soldiers. He's brainwashing them" Clay comments, disgusted.
"We may have a way of finding him. He doesn't hide in plain sight like his father did, so it's a lot harder. But we're close" Lisa explains.
"So stay focused, we may go into another op as soon as we find something else. Go get some rest" Blackburn finishes, looking at us with a serious face.
I walk to Lisa and ask if I could start working on the intel right now. "No, the CIA techs are still confirming a couple of things. But tomorrow morning, noon at most, they expect it to be done for us. Go get some rest too".
I get out of the Command Center and don't see Jason, but honestly I'm sure he needs to be left alone for a while. It must be really weird for him to hunt the son of the terrorist he killed so many years ago. And the draw-dawn, and the fact that the U.S. is making peace with Taliban now. It must all seem like all that Jason did and sacrificed until now wasn't worth it. I don't know how I'd react to it, to be honest, and I don't know what I could possibly tell him to make him feel better. He probably wouldn't listen, anyways., he's too stubborn, and never listens to anyone. So I just get a sandwich at the cafeteria, then go back to my cabin, take a shower, and go to bed.
I am quite tired from all the amazing sex that I just had.
.
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The next day I wake up early, right at dawn, and I text Austin asking if the CIA has something. Half an hour later he tells me no, and that he'll let me know as soon as they do. I'm sure he was sleeping when I sent him the text. So I make my way to the cafeteria, still a little sleepy, and grab some scrambled eggs and bacon.
"You woke up hungry" I suddenly hear a husky voice behind me, and my body burns immediately. My cheeks must be red, because I feel them burning too. Jason continues the tease, "I wonder whythathappened", he says while he walks around the table and sits in front of me, smirking. His plate is completely full.
"I always do" I say to him, unfazed, and raise an eyebrow at his plate, with piles of food.
He starts to eat, and casually explains. "I need the energy for today". He eats a lot of food in a few seconds.
I look at him, alarmed. "Why? Do you guys have an op? Did they find out something already, about Al-Hazred Junior?"
"No" he looks at me, with a weird expression. "I'm thinking about going for a run, or train the guys. Keep them occupied and sharp while we wait" he explains, and I notice he's agitated.
I try to find something out about how he's feeling. "Weird, huh? Killing the father, now going after Junior".
Jason avoids eye contact, and continues to eat fast. "The war never ends. You know that. Nothing unusual about it" he says in a monotone voice.
He's in denial, then. That stage takes a while to pass. "Sure. You'd know" I mutter, and he gives me a quick look, while I eat. We eat in silence for a few seconds, and I didn't eat much. He finished his entire plate.
"What's got you all bothered now?" he suddenly asks, frowning.
I'm surprised by the question. Because not even I know why I'm all quiet. "I'm not" I tell him, confused.
He leans closer to me. "You're quiet. You're never quiet" he teases, and he suddenly looks at his side, and his face shuts down, so I follow his look.
Jimmy is walking into the cafeteria, with Jessica next to him, and a couple of guys from Foxtrot behind them. Jimmy stares at Jason and I with an amused expression, and Jessica has a killer stare. Then they talk to each other and sit at a table far away. Jimmy is wearing full uniform, and is sweaty, so he probably got back from one of his nightly ops. Foxtrot has been busy with a series of ops lately, and they even stayed at another Camp nearby for a couple of days. So I haven't seen Thomas or Jimmy for quite some time.
I sigh and look at Jason again, not even bothered by their stare anymore, and I open my mouth to say that, but Jason apparently is, because he suddenly leaves me alone at the table and goes to have a conversation with Jessica near the counter. They talk really close, and Jason has his back to me, but Jessica is facing me, and keeps smugly smiling at him. There are only a few people at the cafeteria, but still, some of them looked at me, feeling sorry for Jason's impolite manners.
Well, I've had enough to eat, definitely, and I'm tired of that bullshit, because once again Jason is ditching me to talk to fucking Jessica, even though she tried to screw me over. But I'm so tired that I sigh while I stand up and calmly walk out the cafeteria. I was going to my cabin, but decide to take a left turn and get into the long-distance shooting range, just to be quiet for a while. And it has a beautiful view of the mountains there, because it's a little more elevated than the rest of the Camp.
But I barely sit down on a chair under the tent and see that Jason is walking into the area, with his usual broody expression.
"Wanna shoot?" he says, coming closer, sounding friendly, even though his expression is serious.
"No" I sincerely answer, feeling taciturn too. And keep quiet.
Jason opens the metal box and takes something from inside, and to my surprise, he takes out a hockey stick and a few pucks. Only then I notice that at the corner behind me, there's an old hockey goal thrown to the floor, which Jason lifts up, and he starts to shoot the pucks behind me. The sound is a little annoying, because the pucks hit the wooden fence behind the goal.
"It's easy without a goalie, Jason" I remind him, still looking at the view in front of me.
He stops for a second, then he continues. "I've got a lot of energy to spend" he states, gathering the pucks to shoot them again.
Maybe he says that with ulterior motives, but I choose to ignore him. I don't want to hint anything to him anymore. He's kind of giving me nausea now, and I suddenly regret, a lot, not using a condom when having sex with him. Because if he also didn't use a condom with Jessica, it's just disgusting, if I stop to think about it. Maybe he fucked her the day before yesterday and then fucked me last night. I blankly stare at the mountains, now thinking that this is the type of things that happen to young naive girls, when the doctors ask them how did they get diseases, or pregnant. 'I trusted the guy' the girl would answer.
Yet, I can't help but to think, funny enough, that I actually do trust Jason, and he'd never do that to me, put me in any risk. So I sigh, holding onto that thought. He definitely used protection when he had sex with Jessica.
But Jason continues to annoyingly shoot the pucks right behind me.
I turn on my chair and I'm about to harshly yell at him, to stop, but I decide not to, because if I look at him or yell, there's a risk that I might end up crying. It happens when I'm too angry. So I just turn back and keep facing the mountains, in silence. I really am feeling weird today, no doubt about it.
But Jason noticed that I turned on my chair and then turned back, because he stops and sits on the chair next to me.
"So" he says, not hiding how uncomfortable he is, "is there really nothing going on with you?" he tenderly asks, but still uncomfortable. I don't know how his expression is now, because I'm looking at the mountains, so I decide to keep quiet. I'm not feeling bad just because Jason's screwing with Jessica; but the fact that I may have just risked my own health isn't helping me either.
"Are you like this because of Jimmy? Or Jessica?" he suddenly murmurs, with his arms crossed.
I snort. "Couldn't care less about any of them" I say, but he raises his eyebrows, not believing me, obviously thinking that I'm jealous of Jessica, which makes me angrier. "But you obviously do" I bitterly tell him, turning to face him. And he looks serious.
"It's not what you're thinking" he says, still with his arms crossed. I can't understand his expression, so I just keep staring at him, serious. I also have my arms crossed.
Jason sighs. "She's" he starts, hesitates, then he turns to face me, agitated, "threatening to tell Lindell that you and I have something" he finally blurts, and I'm too shocked to say anything. "She wants you out of Bravo Team, of course" he explains, gesturing.
"What?" I finally ask, "But why? What does she know?"
"She doesn't, like ,know anything. She's just threatening to tell him that. But it's been handled" he states, but I need more information, so I continue to stare at him, until he finally blurts the rest.
"Lindell doesn't like me, the feeling is mutual, and she knows that." Jason explains, looking extremely uncomfortable. "I asked her if she was saying she'd tell him something because she had a thing for me, then she called me a pretentious smug, and said no, she said it's because you weren't supposed to be in Bravo, and that you have ahistory" he tells me, looking at me with an annoyed face. I know what he means, probably Jimmy told Jessica the same story that he told Jason.
I stand up too, indignant, but then I remember something. "Lindell likes me" I say to him, with a cocky smirk. He smiles, too.
"Really? How much does he like you?" he asks, coming closer and smiling.
"He and Blackburn nominated me to join DEVGRU, basically. And he knows about Jimmy's real story, it's not confidential, Jason" I tell him, and then I realize that Jason knows that, that Lindell had my file. He wouldn't believe that I would hit on Jason due to any 'history', because I didn't have any.
Jason squirms. "Yes. But, if Jessica told him something, he might suspect it's true. I didn't know Lindell liked you" he explains.
"So is that why you went to talk to her today?" I ask, curious.
"Yes" he says, a little agitated, "Other times I was rude to her, but it was worse. Then I tried to just change her mind and make her give up that idea, because I could also tell Lindell that she shouldn't even work with DEVGRU, anymore, given her mistakes and how she tried to harm your career. She knows Lindell dislikes me, everybody does, so she wasn't buying it, but at least she never said anything yet. But now she was staring at us again".
I feel terrible for him. I didn't know he was being threatened by Jessica. But then I remember something, and take a step closer to him. "And all those days ago at the fire pit, when I was with you, and you left. Were you trying to change her mind too?" I ask, curious. Because I thought he ditched me to have sex with her.
He thinks for a couple of seconds. "Yes. That day too" he answers, with his hands on his hips. Then he smirks at me, obviously thinking that I was jealous.
But I ignore him, my mind is elsewhere. "We didn't have anything then" I say, thinking out loud, because we hadn't even kissed by then, yet.
"Hum. No" he squirms again, now serious.
"Yet she thought you and I had something?" I ask, suspicious, coming closer to him. I notice how uncomfortable he is.
"Yeah… she really dislikes you" he says, nodding exaggeratedly. Of course Jessica saw something between us, or else she wouldn't have said anything to Jason. But I keep quiet.
I remember about the fact that I didn't use protection with him, though, so I need to ask.
"Did you really not sleep with Jessica?" I awkwardly ask, and he chuckles, amused.
"I told you. No. Why?"
"You can tell me if you did. I mean, obviously I wouldn't judge you or anything" I tell him, uncomfortable. But I need to know the truth.
He still has his hands on his hips. "Why are you so fixated on that?" he asks, smug, probably thinking, again, that I'm jealous of her.
"No reason. Forget it" I quickly answer, not convincing anyone. He sounded extremely sincere, and the fact that Jessica is threatening him, and he's trying to handle the situation, explains a lot.
Besides, Lisa told me that Jason was with Natalie right until he was deployed, so he wasn't sleeping with Jessica back then. And of course he was clean with his girlfriend too, he wouldn't risk it with her. Maybe she wasn't on the pill and they used protection, or maybe not. But I notice that he trusts me completely, because he didn't ask anything about it to me.
Jason keeps quiet, looking at me with a serious face, and swallows.
"You promised me something when we were interrupted last night" he huskily says.
"I promised you nothing" I correct him, smirking. Jason's stare makes me feel very desired. "But if you really want, I can show you".
He hesitates. "I locked the gate" he says, surprising me, "Just in case someone saw us in here, alone" he quickly explains, but it didn't help his case, and he knows that.
"Good to know" I softly say, then stay still.
Jason waits for a few seconds, staring at my serious face, then he swallows again.
"Show me".
I remain serious and still. "Are you sure?"
Now he looks impatient. "Yes, Victoria. Show me".
I smile, hoping that there wouldn't be any phone buzzing to interrupt us. I think for a second about how to proceed, but then I decide to undress first. I'm very shy about my body, as every woman usually is, but I want to tease him to the limit. We are close to the tent, but I don't want to stay under that ugly tent. I like the view from the shooting wooden deck. So I make my way to there. While undressing. I take off my shoes, then top, then pants, all with Jason behind me, I don't even know where, to be honest. I only turn to him when I'm taking off my pants, and he's already shirtless and closer to me than I thought, only six feet away. His face is serious and his eyes are hungry, and I feel very empowered. Especially because I'll get to ride him in a few moments.
Jason takes off his pants when he sees me only in my underwear, and I love to see his body bathed by the early morning light. It's amazing. I only hope that my body is looking good with that sunlight too. But his stare tells me he's not disliking it, at all.
"Sit" I gesture to him to sit on the edge of the deck, and I calmly take off my bra and then my panties, while he takes off his boxer briefs and sits on the edge of the deck, already hard. The deck's not too tall, only five feet, but he'll have to hold me firmly so I won't fall back. But that's why I chose that spot. I want him to use his strength too, and I trust he won't let me fall. And the view, for him, will be great.
Jason doesn't take his eyes off of me, and I slowly walk to him. He's heavily breathing, and so am I, and I haven't even touched him yet my body is already burning with his gaze. I place my hands on his broad shoulders, and straddle him, standing above his erection. I kiss his lips slowly and deeply, and then I feel the need to kiss his face too, because he's looking cute, and he is worried since yesterday, about Al-Hazred Junior, and I do that, kissing his gunpowder freckles, while Jason grabs my buttocks and squeezes them, firmly. I know he must be impatient, but I don't really care.
I finally feel impatient too and stop kissing him to sit on his erection, and it feels as amazing at I remember. He's loudly gasping and I exhale while he fills me completely, and I stay like that for a couple of seconds. He's breathing hard, and I lean back a little, so he can kiss and lick my breasts. He holds me firmly while he does that, and I feel him softly biting my nipple. I open my eyes and I see he's impatient again.
I place my lips against his and start to move up and down, slowly, and we're both gasping, but after a while I feel the need to feel him closer, so I wrap my arms around his neck and move slightly forward too. It's amazing to feel my body grazing his, and to feel his heavy breathing with his stomach glued on mine. He seems to like it too, because he suddenly presses my lower back, making me sit even closer to him, and supports his weight with the other hand, leaning back a little so I'm even more on top of him, and rubbing him completely when I move. I'm trying to not be too loud and moan quietly, but it's hard to focus with Jason's husky moans in my ear; I didn't even know I could be a loud person until now. I'm restraining myself, a lot.
I move faster and harder and dishevel his hair, now fully aware that I'm playing with fire. Because I realize that I could just stay there all day long riding Jason, and I'd never get sick of it. I feel like he's liking it a lot too, because he's pressing my ass firmly, and keeps kissing my neck and desperately gasping and moaning in my ear.
"Is this what you wanted, Jason?" I ask him, without any control over my tongue. He presses his rough fingers on my butt, and I feel it. But he keeps quiet, so I move a lot slower.
"Yes" he quickly and huskily says, "Please, don't stop, Vicky".
I reward him moving faster again, and decide to try something to make it even more unforgettable for him, just in case. I deliberately contract my core every time I move up, wrapping him, and Jason immediately feels it and loudly moans. He moves his hand up and gently pulls my hair and head, just to look at my face, and I'm lazily smirking while he's looking at me astonished, with his mouth open and his face reddish. He pulls my hair a little more to get access to my breasts, which he now licks and kisses eagerly. He sits straight again and uses the other hand to embrace me.
"What are you doing" Jason suddenly mumbles, with a shaky voice, "don't ever… God" he stutters, then he bites my breast, and when I shudder he comes back to face me, serious, and looking into my eyes. My smirk disappears, because he has an anxious look, and I lick my lips and stop contracting on purpose, maybe now I'mtrulyplaying with fire. But his eyes don't change, he's pressing my hair and embracing my waist. He then looks down at my lips and my body, while I continue to move, now faster.
"How could he not defend you?" Jason harshly says, out of nowhere, and I'm totally confused. I hesitate, and he suddenly pulls me away from the edge of the deck and rolls me to the floor, and in a second Jason's on top of me.
He continues to look at me, this time with an annoyed expression, and now he's the one thrusting relentlessly into me, hard and fast. "Do you think he's good?" he dangerously asks, but I have no idea about what he's talking about. "Did youthank himfor not doing anything?" he continues, mocking, and I finally understand who he's talking about. He's talking about Thomas. And apparently he's quite jealous of him.
"Not everyone has the guts to stand against Jimmy" I explain, trying to defend Thomas, but very aware that he truly was useless back then.
"You did" he huskily says, and then he places his lips on mine. "Please, tell me he never laid a finger on you".
I swallow, and hesitate, and he immediately notices, because he distances his face from mine, with an indignant expression. He stops moving completely, so I try to calm him down. "Just once. He tried to kiss me. He kissed me for a couple of seconds, then let me go" I lie. Of course that if I hadn't kicked his balls, he wouldn't have let me go. And it was more than a couple of seconds, unfortunately.
Jason looks at me with a concerned expression, then softly kisses my lips and starts to thrust again, but deeply and gently. "I'm sorry" he mumbles. "You're safe now" he assures me, and although I hate when people feel sorry for me, I realize that he doesn't pity me, he's just trying to make me feel safe.
"I know" I tell him, "you guys are the best" I confess, and I mean it. Jason gives me a cute smile, and I smile back, but then his smile fades away and mine too. He buries his face on my neck and moves a lot faster, and we're both desperate for our release. At least it feels like it.
I can't help but to think that maybe Jason felt sad because I want to stay with Bravo, and this way we can't be together, officially, but I doubt it. We don't know each other long enough. And to be honest, I don't know if I'd do that, give up a spot in one of the best special teams there is for something that I don't even know if it has any future. Lisa is also waiting for more than a year for a spot out of Bravo, and she almost got mine when I left Foxtrot. Except that Lindell couldn't risk it, at least for now, and placed a man in my spot, and probably it was for the best for Lisa. And I only got this spot in Bravo Team because Mark Duwes retired from the ops, he was almost fifty years old and didn't want to travel anymore. The Navy gave me the spot to hush me about Jimmy, too. The rest of the Officers are young, even younger than me, and love to travel, so they aren't leaving DEVGRU anytime soon. So, Lisa and I are stuck where we are, for better or worse. Sonny would never leave Bravo, and Lisa also loves her career at DEVGRU, as do I. So there's nothing to do but to wait.
Maybe that's what Jason is thinking, or maybe not, but all I know is that he places his face in front of mine again and holds my hair in his hands, like the last time. He's a very intense man. I feel close to my orgasm, and I let him know, but I also let him know more than that, unfortunately. I let him know how much I want him. But maybe he didn't notice.
"Please don't stop, Jason" I whisper to his lips, panting, and press my nails on his shoulders, and he thrusts harder. "Don't you dare" I almost threaten him, in despair.
He tries to chuckle, but is almost breathless. "Don't worry. I won't" he promises me, with a cute smile, and of course I can't resist him. So I immediately come, shutting my eyes, and stop breathing, but a second later I feel and hear Jason coming too, and he's not so discreet. "God" he loudly groans, and continues to groan while he empties himself. His husky voice is very audible at that huge open area.
I'm breathless and I hear Jason's catching his breath too, with his face buried in my hair. I look to my right and the view of the mountains is amazing, and that's the view that Jason had when I was on top of him. I glance down and notice that we're at the edge of the deck, actually I am, and Jason is still on top of me, and I almost fall down from the scare. Not that I would get badly injured or anything. But thankfully Jason was aware of that and firmly grabs me by my waist, rolling me to the side, and he rolls too, facing me. We're both laying on that dusty wooden deck, sweating and panting. He's looking at me, amused, but quiet.
"That's a beautiful view you had there" I playfully tell him, pointing with my head behind me, to the mountains covered with the yellow sunlight. He smirks, then caresses my breast with his thumb, looking down at my body. I slightly contract my stomach, just in case.
"It is" he simply says, serious, then looks back at my face. "I told you I had energy to spend" he playfully reminds me.
"You weren't lying" I say, lazily smiling at him, and he keeps smirking at me. "I should go" I tell him, not moving an inch. He nods, not moving an inch, either, just laying on his side, facing me.
"Jason" I call him, and he raises his eyebrow, "it's ok to feel weird" I tell him, and he frowns, amused. "About going after Junior" I explain, and his smirk disappears. He immediately sits up to stand, and I do that too.
"It's just another op, Vicky. Nothing more than that" he states, a little harsh, and takes his underwear, putting it back on, while I look for my panties and bra. Jason is quicker than a fox, because I barely got my panties on and he's already closing his pants, so I walk to him, with my bra in my hand, to force him to stay and talk about something.
"You're not leaving me here undressed, are you?" I ask, purposely standing close to him so my body touches his. Of course he stopped moving immediately.
"Of course not" he says, indignant, and watches while I put on my bra and gesture for him to close it behind my back. I don't need is help, of course, but I do that on purpose, again, because now he has to listen to what I say. And I knew he'd never leave me there alone, naked; he's too protective for that.
"All I'm saying" I start talking again, and he helps me gather my clothes, and his, in the meantime, "is that all of the things that you sacrificed back then still mean a lot" I say, and he glances at me, stern. "Our country needed you to kill Asim back then, and needs you and the guys to go after Junior now".
He keeps silent, then hands me my clothes, while putting on his t-shirt and plaid shirt. "I know. It's just that, that's the op that changed me the most, I think. That's why it's a little weird" he admits, mumbling.
"Let me guess" I say, putting on my pants, "It made you focus more on the team". He looks at me, surprised, but it's obvious. Everybody in DEVGRU knows that during that op Bravo Two died and his old team leader died soon after that too. So, he took in all the responsibilities at once, and of course, he lost valuable time with his family. He could never be Bravo One otherwise, back then. I'm starting to think that people are afraid to tell Jason the truth, or to make him realize that some things just happen, and it's nobody's fault. And that sometimes there are no right or wrong choices. Maybe he'd be bitter all his life if he hadn't tried to be Bravo One. He could never know for sure.
He sighs. "Yes. I decided to focus on the team. And I lost my son's birth because of that" he says, distressed, crossing his arms, waiting for me to put on my shoes. I rest my hand on his arms for support, and even I feel awkward about how natural it feels to me.
"I'm sorry" I finally tell him, sincere, after I finish putting on my shoes. "But maybe you'd also wonder what would happen if you didn't stay. Maybe something else would happen here without you. You can't know for sure, Jason" I try to explain, but he keeps quiet, looking down. My phone finally buzzes, and I grab it on the tent. It's Blackburn texting me to go to the Command Center. I'm glad he didn't call me sooner, but it's still early. I look down and my clothes are a little dusty, but I can shower later.
"Am I presentable?" I ask Jason, walking back to him, because I won't have time to go to my cabin. I take some dust off my pants and top, and Jason dusts off my hair a little, smirking. Then he takes off dust from my chest, by coincidence, still smirking.
"You're all good" he finally says, after a proper check. "Oh, wait, I'll unlock it for ya" he says, walking with me to the gate, that is far away. "You get out first, just in case. I'll leave later" he says, and I nod. He takes his key from the pocket of his pants, then hesitates when he looks at the floor. There's a rock there, but not touching the gate. As if someone opened it. He tries to disguise it and unlocks the gate with his key.
"Who has the key, Jason?" I dangerously ask behind him, and he turns to me with an apologizing look.
"Just" he says, agitated, "Special Teams. But only a few. Like, two per team", he tries to pretend like it's not a big deal.
"What" I say, indignant, "I thought you guys only had one key". I feel dumb for thinking that now. "Oh my God" I suddenly feel nauseous, "Does anyone from Foxtrot has the key? Have they seen me naked, Jason?" I'm almost crying, and Jason gestures for me to calm down.
"No, no, they didn't ok? I swear. They weren't even supposed to be here deployed. Just us, ok? Promise" he says, but I'm still nervous. Someone saw us, someone who knows us. "Look" he notices I'm still nervous, and he jogs to where we were, and yells, "See? It's too far, nobody saw you ok?" he opens his arms, anxious, but it's true, it's very far away and the person coming from the gate would have seen us from the corner, which was very far. If they walked on the deck, we would have seen them too, for sure. Jason jogs back to me, smiling. "See? Besides, I was all over you, so" he says, now naughtily smiling, and I unconsciously lick my lips, remembering the sensation.
"Still, someone saw us, Jason. From Bravo. We're the only special team deployed here in J-Bad now" I remind him, worried. I'm terrified, actually, that someone would tell Blackburn about this.
"Yeah. So. I'll try to find out, ok? But seriously, don't worry. Nobody would ever tell Blackburn anything. I know them. Maybe they didn't recognize both of us" he assures me, and he's right. But he's concerned about that, too. Obviously somebody will give him a hard time after that, even if it is just teasing him or something like that.
"Can you please tell me who it is when you find out? So I can prepare myself mentally" I ask, slightly smiling. He nods, smirking.
"Yeah, I will. Don't worry" he says, and gives me a bear hug, to calm me down. It's delicious and his plaid shirt is really comfy and manly, I love it. But, unfortunately, I have to go.
"I gotta go, Jason. Blackburn will kill me if I don't", I murmur to him, and he relaxes the embrace. Still, I give him a quick kiss on the lips and turn to leave, without looking back.
It's only the second time that I sleep with Jason and we could be already facing a scandal. That's just not good.
But the worse part is that it would be really hard for me to let him go, if I have to.
.