The Road Not Taken

Summary: What if Robert didn't change his mind when he fired Bates? What if Anna still pursued him? What if Bates got his knee fixed and returned to the Army? Answers inside. R/R please.

Disclaimer: I am posting this story for my best friend, Lisa, who wrote it to help entertain me while I have been having health struggles. It morphed into much more than she intended and as it goes on, it becomes very personal to both of us. She was too shy to post herself in a new fandom, she's only come to Downton Abbey a few months ago. So, I said I'd post it and let her know how it does. Thanks for reading.

Chapter 1

Robert stood in front of the window wishing nothing more than for it to help him with the very difficult decision he had to make. Although he wanted nothing more than for this arrangement with his long time friend and old comrade to work out; that didn't seem to be happening. Unfortunately friendship needed to be put aside for the sake of the household.

A soft knock caused Robert to call out permission for Bates to enter though he didn't look in his direction.

It was time to dress, but today would be the last time that John dressed Robert, and that pained him. They had gone through so much together in the war that caused Bates' knee injury, but that couldn't be an excuse. Robert wrestled with whether he was making the right decision, knowing how hard it would be for Bates to find another job given his age and disability.

Robert waited until he finished dressing then let out a long sigh when the valet asked if he required anything else, "Yes, just one moment Bates, have you recovered from your fall earlier today?"

"I apologize for that m'lord, I honestly don't know what happened," John admitted, expecting the topic to be brought up. He knew exactly what had happened by the look on Mrs. O Brien's face after she tripped him with the sole purpose of disturbing the Duke's arrival and bring embarrassment to Bates.

Robert slowly turned and faced his friend, "The thing is Bates, I said I would give you a trial and I have. If it was only up to me, but it's a question of a valet's extra duties of waiting tables and carrying things."

With the pause he studied the valet's sunken face that showed awareness of where this was going. Robert hated for it to go this way but certain duties needed to be performed, no matter who the person is.

"Might I make a suggestion that when an extra footman is required it comes out of my wages, because I am eager to stay m'lord," John softened his voice, his tone pleading while not begging.

"I know you are, but I couldn't allow that and I also wanted to make this work out Bates," Robert shook his head.

John shifted his weight from the bad leg, "You see, finding another position will be nearly impossible for me. Even in another house, it is unlikely due to my injury that I shall find another position."

Silence fell between them with only a long stare by his lordship wishing there was something he could do to help his old comrade without compromising the efficiency of the house.

"I understand m'lord, and I shall collect my things and go at once," John fought the collection of tears in his eyes, at least until he settled into the privacy of his bedroom. The last thing he wanted was to cry in front of his lordship.

Robert took a step closer, speaking softly, "There's no need to rush out into the night Bates, stay and take the train at nine tomorrow, and you shall have a month's wages. That I insist upon.."

"Very good m'lord," John's voice cracked as he turned for a slow exit from the room with one last look of disappointment and betrayal flashing across his face. It was unreadable to anyone not intimate with him and no one was that close to John Bates.

Ever since he'd stepped foot at Downton Abbey he hoped to stay permanently but things never seemed to work out the way one hoped. As it was already late, he went straight to his room instead of the servant's hall for dinner.

John sat on the bed that faced towards the wall and thought about how much he liked it here when he first arrived. How foolish he had been to think it would have worked out, even if he and Lord Gratham had been friends.

Once he settled, his large body slumped forward, shaking as he began to sob into the empty room. If he'd been fired for things of his accord then he would take it with dignity and leave with no hard feeling. As it stood, that was not the case but he was never one to put blame on others for his misfortunes. This happened because he wasn't good enough.

All that could be done now was to look to the road ahead with the hopes of finding some kind of work.

Still, being in this house felt more like a home with Lord and Lady Gratham unlike most employers. They both cared for their staff and treated them with kindness, gratitude, and respect.

Then there was Anna, who from the minute he stepped inside, made his heart skip quite a few beats. Despite the obvious age difference, he felt something for her almost immediately upon first greeting. Now it seemed nothing was likely to happen as he wasn't sure where he would end up staying.

Having only the few things he brought upon his arrival at Downton Abbey left him with few choices on where to stay. He had a small savings, but it wouldn't last long.

The thought of having to leave such a wonderful household with no earthly idea on what he would do brought a new round of tears to his eyes.

His entire body shuddered with muffled sobs, afraid someone walking past might hear him cry. It wasn't dignified for a man to cry so he hid away in the solitude of his room to do so.

A soft voice called from the hallway.
He ignored it at first until it registered that the voice belonged to Anna. John used a handkerchief to wipe his eyes, having to push up using his cane and slowly walked to the door.

When it opened he found Anna standing in the hallway holding a tray with plates of food and cup of milk, "I brought you something up, in case you were hungry."

The gentleness in her gaze when she offered him the tray brought a smile to his face, "That was very kind, thank you."

John took the tray from her steady hands to place down on the chair just behind him and quickly looked back towards the door. The look of her soft eyes giving such a sympathetic sparkle made having to leave even harder.

"I'm ever so sorry you're going, let us know when you're fixed, else I'll worry," Anna spoke.

"We can't have that now can we? I will probably stay in town somewhere and I will write to you . Perhaps on your day off you could come by to see me, if you like to of course," John offered with hope.

Anna slowly smiled, "Yes, I would actually like that very much, Mr. Bates, I would like to see you."

With slow nods of mutual agreement, they parted ways for John to duck inside the small room where he brought the tray to bed. On it, a simple sandwich and smaller snacks just enough to satisfy him until the morning. John smiled, grateful she even thought of him enough to bring up a tray so he didn't starve until morning.

As he took a bite of the sandwich John exhaled slowly, "You are not a free man John Bates, you cannot do this to her. She does not deserve that kind of life or talk." Still, he could not stop thinking about her.

He set the tray down on the bed beside him thoughtfully considering a life without Anna in it, but he couldn't possibly.