'Why…is everything so dark?' The thought flashed through my half-asleep mind as I stretched out, the blanket around me smelling a bit like dirt as I blinked a few times before realizing that it was actually dirt.

'Oh, I'm buried alive. …Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!' My mind went into panic overdrive as I clawed at the ground around me, thankful that it was loose as I easily dug right through the dirt & burst out of the surface with a deep gasp.

As I took gasping breaths to make sure that I wasn't dying, I blinked as I realized how bright & colourful the world is, looking around only to frown at the mountains surrounding me as well as the rather confusing machine next to me.

'Am I as high as a kite or is that a literal Time Machine next to me?' I thought with a slow blink as I stared at the large egg-like vehicle, its five legs and glass capsule-like top making me realize that A)it was actually real and B)it was way too big to be normal.

However, I frowned as I saw the melted hole in the capsule window, pulling myself out of the hole in the ground before freezing at the sight of a pair of three-fingered hands holding me up, the skin a mixture of lime-green & emerald with black dots scattered all over them.

Slowly pushing the rest of my body out of the ground, my eyes kept widening as a nearly humanoid form with the same colour as my hands and covered in black dots appeared from.

Well, nearly.

Instead of human legs, I stared at a pair of insectoid legs with three-toed feet, both covered in the same exoskeleton as the rest of my body while my groin & parts of my abdomen were covered in an orange exoskeleton.

Looking behind me, I blinked at the long tail affixed to the middle of my back with a rather sharp stinger at the end that went well with the black beetle-like wings that grew out from my upper back.

'I am dressed in the best Imperfect Cell cosplay I have ever seen and I woke up buried alive next to a perfect replica of the Time Machine?…Did I sign up for a Dragon Ball live-action without even realizing it? Damn, I must have been high as fuck.' I thought with a wry grin as I looked around, squinting a bit to see if I could find the camera crew hiding away.

I have to admit, though. The suit was well-made. It even felt realistic as shit when I touched the tail and could actually feel the rigged edges of it through the gloves I was wearing.

'Wait, do they have special effects?' I thought with an excited grin and I knew that I was going off-script, but truthfully…

They can find another actor as Cell. I'm doing everything I can.

"So, all I should do is reach for my ki and…hwah!" With the best imitation of a ki shout that I could, I grinned as a white aura appeared from thin air around me, cupping my hands together while pulling them to my side.

'Oh damn. These special effects are awesome! Now, time to do the one thing every Dragon Ball kid did when they were younger.'

"Ka…Me…Ha…Me…" My grin widened as the light surrounding my body brightened up with each word, a dark blue orb of light appearing between my hands before growing lighter & lighter as I continued with the phrase.

"HA!" With my best shout, I acted out my best pose as I aimed my hands at the time machine while letting my 'energy' free.

I was expecting the time machine to explode with effects or for the ground under it to sunk in & let it sink to be underneath the set as the 'blast' obscured it from view.

However, what happened next shocked me as the machine, the mountains behind it and the ground under the wave of 'energy' was erased before even a second could pass, with me watching in silent shock, horror & awe,

As the energy fizzled out, I was greeted by a sight that would make the devil proud as nothing but destruction was laid out in front of me for kilometers on end.

'…What…the actual…fuck?' Thoughts flashed through my mind at light speed as I looked at the devastation before slowly looking down at my hands, watching as the ki still circulated around my body before I did the best thing I could.

I took off like a motherfucker.

"Hah…hah…hah…" I don't know for how long I've been running or how far, but I just took a random direction and ran like Goku found out I was the strongest being in the world.

That was not exactly true since I'm pretty certain that I'm in the present timeline where the Androids were stronger than they were in the future as I would only be near the Time Machine if Cell had killed Trunks in an alternate timeline & gone back.

All in all, I'm not the strongest and that is a problem.

'Fuck worrying about the fact that I was born into another world or how I got here. I need to find a way off of this planet fast. Wait…I'm made out of Frieza's cells. I can just fly the fuck off of here.' I thought with a grin as I looked up to the sky, focusing on my ki before sending myself rocketing into the air.

However, just as I pierced right through the exosphere in the air, my eyes widened as my entire body locked up, feeling the gravity around me intensify before I wheezed as an invisible force sent me rocketing back towards the ground.

'…O-Okay. W-What…what the fuck was that?!' I exclaimed in my mind as I laid in a deep crater, not even sore apart from the aching pain in my chest where the force had hit me.

I know that Kami is most definitely not strong enough to hurt me since the Z-Fighters in the Saiyan Saga were all stronger than him and I'm leagues above them.

So, what the hell was that?

'Wait a second. I want to leave.' I thought in my mind as I sat up before my eyes widened with a gasp as I was smashed face first into the ground, unable to move even a single muscle.

'I…I…want…to become…strong.' Immediately, the pressure vanished without a trace and I gasped as air finally flowed into my lungs, letting me catch my breath as I slowly sat up.

'I want to become strong enough to beat Gohan with one hand.' Again, there was no pressure that made me want to vomit as I walked out of the crater, taking a deep breath to ready myself.

'I want to leave this planet at this moment.' Immediately, I strained my legs as I was forced to squat as low as I possibly could, the gravity on my shoulders actively trying to push me deeper into the earth.

'I want to leave this planet after I absorb Androids 17 & 18.' I thought urgently before stumbling as the pressure disappeared, quickly catching my footing while staring at the ground.

"So…if I want to leave, I have to absorb the Androids?" This time, I blinked as I felt a pat on my shoulders, spinning around & frowning as I looked all around me while stretching out my ki senses only to frown as I didn't find anything.

'Okay, I'm guessing this is the work of whoever brought me here and made me Cell. Do I have to, though? I mean, I could just absorb on-Okay, I'll do both!' I quickly corrected myself as the pressure appeared once more, though it wasn't as strong as the first and I sighed as it swiftly disappeared, leaving me standing alone in the middle of the rocky plains I crashed onto.

"…Hah, why couldn't I have been Krillin? I could have been banging 18 all day long and we could have had normal jobs as Bulma's bodyguards. Easy fucking money. Not that she needs any being Vegeta's wife, but it's the thought that counts."

'You know, being Cell is broken in more way than one. Firstly, the cells of the best fighters in the entire universe were integrated into my very being along with the best racial abilities that each of their species had. Secondly, Dr. Gero is a genius to have been able to take abstract memories and implant them into my body as if I was the one who experienced them.' I thought with a smirk as I floated in the air with a care, my ki flow throughout my body kept calm & perfect as if I have been doing this from the moment I was born.

Being able to access & manipulate my ki was not that hard when you take into account that I had the memories of Frieza, King Cold, Vegeta, Goku and Piccolo all engraved into my mind.

Well, it was not exactly their memories. It was more of a matter where he took the memory RNA from their cells and integrated it into my hippocampus itself, which also serves as a database for information on the entire Red Ribbon Army.

'Wait, how did I know that?…Oh right, I have his memories too.' I thought with a shake of my head as I landed back on the ground, taking a deep breath before a hiss echoed in the air as I let it out.

"Hah, okay. Now what?" I had no clue what to do now since I could either go after the Androids or I could head over to the large gathering of ki to the far south.

There was just a few problems with the first plan. The Androids were probably far stronger than their future counterparts, which meant that they were stronger than me, and the second part was that I had no way of tracking them since they didn't have ki like the ordinary person.

That led me to consider Plan B: Meeting the Z-Fighers.

'…Yeah, they're too trigger happy for Androids and even if they all believe me, there's a certain Saiyan Prince that doesn't take no for an answer and a certain Namekian that would be suspicious of my every move.' I thought with a sigh as I sat back down, humming over the last option before I blinked as a thought came to mind.

'Wait a second. I know of a damn good way to get power. After all, I'm not the only Cell in this world.'

'Hmm, apart from Goku, none of them even compare to me in terms of power.' I thought with a pleased smirk as I watched the Z-Fighters chatting amongst themselves as they waited outside of the city where the Androids were supposed to show up.

I knew that all of them were suppressing their power levels as far as much as they could, but thanks to my ki sensing and the memories of my past life, I was just barely able to make a rough chart of where they all lie compared to me.

That was in terms of power though because I knew that if we were going skill-wise, I was so far behind it wasn't even funny. Even Yamcha, the weakest of the group from what I could sense, would kick my ass so bad I might want to dig a hole and do the Yamcha pose in it to make myself feel better.

While it was true that I had their skills and abilities, it's kind of hard to fight when you have the fighting skills of five completely different fighters, all with their own fighting style.

'Until I can get enough time to get all of their fighting styles down, I'm going to be doing a bit of invisible stalker.' I thought as I kept myself afloat in the cloud I was hiding in, thankful for the ki suppression skill of Goku & Piccolo as those were the only things that let me lower my power to match that of the few birds flying past.

'Oh, and there goes Yajirobe. Now, focus on the Androids.' I ignored Yajirobe's car falling to the sea as well as the Z-Fighters all still surprised as I focused on where Android 19 & 20 were, watching as the two robots leapt from their cover in the smoke & flew towards the city below them.

'Huh, they're pretty fast.' To the average eye, Dr. Gero and his friend would have been completely invisible as they leapt to and fro through the crowded city, neither giving a single misstep or leaving a single bit of evidence of them being there as they made their way towards the far west side.

'Right, I forgot about the Android part. Their brains are probably calculating how to move their bodies in the most efficient way possible. Man, why couldn't I have had that instead of just a simple memory bank?' Then again, my mind is capable of storing an infinite amount of data.

I think. There wasn't exactly a user manual on just what I am capable of apart from the order to absorb #17 & #18, so I wouldn't know.

'Oh, there goes Yamcha. Man, am I glad I wasn't made into him. Got his girl taken by the boss of the little cabbage head that killed him for the first time and then having another man penetrating your guts…he was dealt a bad hand in life.' I thought with a sympathetic shake of my head before my sympathy disappeared as I watched Goku & the others landing in front of the androids, getting ready to follow them.

I knew that Goku went Super Saiyan against the Androids, but as the saying goes 'seeing is believing' and I was believing that Goku was almost near my level as his power surged dramatically, the sky around the city growing windy and the flames around them being snuffed as I watched the now blonde man speak to the Androids.

Watching as they all except for Gohan & Krillin followed Goku and the Androids out of the city, I watched them leaving before slowly looking down at where Krillin was feeding Yamcha a Senzu bean.

Don't mind if I do.

With a simple thought, the air around me exploded as I rocketed down towards the city, time almost standing still as the fighters barely had a moment to register my ki before I crashed into the ground between them.

Before they could gather themselves, Krillin wheezed as my leg crashed into his chest with the best roundhouse I could while holding back as much as I needed, making sure to grab the bag of beans from his hands & place three down on the ground before I quickly blasted back into the sky.

'Seven beans. That's an amazing haul.' I thought with a smirk as I suppressed my ki as much as I could once more before flying away as fast as I could, my smirk widening as I felt Gohan trying & failing to keep up before I felt him flying back towards the others.

All in all, it was a good day to be me.

A/N: Before anyone gets pissed off at me for writing another self-insert, I needed to get this written down because it has been bothering me so much that I couldn't write my other stuff without getting this out.

So, yeah, welcome to my very first dive into the Dragon Ball/ DBZ/ DBGT/ Dragon Ball Super Franchise. There will elements included from almost every series & their movies and some will be removed.

It all depends on how I need the story to move.

Also, for those that are going to complain about how Cell only had their skills & not their memories, I have one simple answer.

Fanfiction~ This is already an alternate universe with him being in it, so I gave him something helpful since #17 & #18 got Infinite Ki.

Now, for those that want to read ahead, there's already 7 chapters written out ahead so if you want, go to my Pat. Re. On. C. Om/ KingCrimsonNova.

Also, great news for those that don't want to use the big Pat-site or can't use it, my Buy Me A Cup of Coffee(Don't know if its name is also banned so I stretched it out a bit) is also up under KingNovaCrimson.

For those that don't know what that is, it's ByMiACoffi(Buy Me A Coffee but all together).

There, you'll have everything like Pat-site, but you now also get to do annual subscriptions for I think 10% off, not sure(Also, they're not actually ten. I just made it that way.)

Also, first ten people that join it, I'll give you a month free of charge.

Also, for the first person to join the top tier for a full year, I'll give you a year free of charge.

Anyway, yeah. That's it.

As always, read, enjoy, review and until next week…

Welcome to Perfection? That's not for Me.