Chapter 5 The Ultimate Laugh Off

"That's really how he feels?"

Ludwig put his hand to his temple. "Yes." He frowned. "I can't remember the last time I have seen him feeling down like this."

"Me neither." Morton adjusted his position on the bed, making his chain chomp, Wiggles, jump back down to the floor. "Usually… well, you don't need me to tell you how Lemmy usually is." He chuckled, but the sound was so hollow that not only did it fail to make Ludwig laugh, but it also made the mood of the scene much more unbearable. Ludwig's frown got deeper as he looked down at Morton's floor. Once Morton's laughter died down, the only sound in the room was Topaz the parrot, squawking away in her cage.

Morton adjusted his position a second time (he must be having trouble getting comfortable). "Maybe… maybe we need to give him some sort of pick-me-up."

"Yeah, but what would that be?" Ludwig bit his lip as his mind filled with ideas. Each one had an appeal all its own until he recalled Lemmy's dejected eyes and broken spirit. Then the appeal fizzled out into nothing. "This isn't something a simple party or a nice conversation can fix. This goes beyond that." Ludwig looked into Morton's eyes. "He had that look in his eyes. He looked like he was dealing with despair. Not sadness, not sorrow, despair. LEMMY of all people was experiencing despair!" Ludwig whimpered. "I didn't even… know he could feel that way."

Morton whimpered. "I… I see." His eyes grew misty as he rubbed his head. "And to think this all stems from a simple dream."

"I know, right!" Ludwig shook his head. "But saying that does what he's going through a great disservice. Based on what he told me, it wasn't just a dream. It was a nightmare that stems from a fear that he's had for…" Ludwig sighed. "I don't even know how long." The room fell silent again. Ludwig started pacing back and forth, feeling like he was spinning out of control. He had experienced downward spirals before, and this definitely qualified.

Eventually, much to Ludwig's surprise, Morton chuckled in a way that wasn't hollow at all. "You know, I think it's sweet that you're this concerned about him."

"Well, he is my brother."

"True." Morton came up and walked over to him. "But if we were having this discussion five to six years ago, it would be going very differently."

Ludwig stopped before snickering. "That is true." He chuckled and shook his head. "Lemmy has just done so much for me in the last five years. He's been there for me in tremendous ways, helping pull me up from the brink of despair. And… I want to return the favor." He looked Morton in the eye once again. "I want to show him that he's wrong. He has made an impact on people; an amazing impact on people! I'm living proof of that fact. It… it's possible I might not even be here if it wasn't for him."

A somber look flashed across Morton's face as he nodded. "I get it. Believe me, I get it." He looked over at Wiggles, chowing down from the food bowl right next to the bathroom door. He then looked over at Toasty, sleeping away on his windowsill. "Some people are far more important than they give themselves credit for."

"Exactly." Ludwig resumed with pacing. "But I don't just want to remind Lemmy of that fact. I want to remind him of it in a way that'll ensure he'll never forget it again." He sighed. "I just don't know how…"

Right at that moment, much to Ludwig's surprise, Wendy came into the room. Unlike the two other two Koopalings, Wendy had a smile on her face, one that helped lift Ludwig's mood despite the fact that none of his problems have been solved. "Hey guys!"

"Hey, Wendy," Morton said as Ludwig stopped pacing. "What's up?"

Wendy's smile grew brighter and sparklier. "Well… I was browsing online, trying to find some really cool items I could get for Worker's Appreciation Day when I saw something really cool."

"Oh, you found something the servants would like?" Ludwig asked.

"Not the servants," Wendy said as she giggled mischievously. "Lemmy."

That caught Ludwig's attention immediately. Perking up, he stepped towards his sister along with Morton. "Really now?"

"Yes! It was an ad that really caught my attention and…" she giggled before gesturing for them to follow her out the door. "Oh, I can't really explain it. You guys need to see it for yourselves!"

Ludwig and Morton exchanged a hopeful look before following Wendy out of the room.

…

Six out of the seven Koopalings sat in front of Wendy's computer, with the only one absent being Iggy. Lemmy had been allowed to sit in the swivel chair by Wendy, and he currently had it turned to her as she closed the door. The other five boys also looked upon her, with the anticipation growing more and more.

"Well?" Lemmy asked as the giggling Wendy made her way over to the desktop, which showed a black screen. "What is it that's going to make me so happy, Wendy?"

"Oh, you guys are gonna love this." She went over to the computer, typed into the login screen, and a paused video showed up. Ludwig immediately tried to visually take in as much information as he could. The thumbnail showed a beanish woman, with bright green skin, silky platinum blonde hair done up with an assortment of rainbow ribbons, a red overcoat and pants, a black top hat, and a smile that made Ludwig want to smile right alongside her. His eyes traveled from the woman to the video title. It read "Compete in the Koopa Kingdom's Ultimate Laugh Off."

That was what Ludwig saw right as Wendy clicked the play button. Once the video stopped buffering, a party cannon went off on screen, sending confetti spraying everywhere. The camera traveled from that to the beanish woman, who still looked like she didn't even know the concept of sadness as she addressed the audience.

"Greetings, my adoring fans. Many of you know me as Rouge Albertine." Rouge winked at the camera. "All of you who have watched me on the big screen know that nothing makes me happier than some comedy; it's the gift that keeps on giving." She laughed louder and heavier than Ludwig was used to, making him raise an eyebrow. "And I know that many of you lovely people are bouncing in your seat, hoping to show off your comedic skill, so my entertainment-poisoned brain has come up with a once-in-a-lifetime event that'll tickle everyone's funny bones and make whoopee cushions a thing of the past!" Rouge cleared her throat. "I have decided to host… the Koopa Kingdom's first Ultimate Laugh Off!"

The words that Rouge had just spoken flew on screen in bright red font, flashing and sparkling like a disco ball. The Koopalings exchanged looks as Rouge Albertine jumped right back into explaining her vision.

"That's right, the Koopa Kingdom's Ultimate Laugh Off!" Rouge started walking across the set with the camera following her. "I extend this invitation to any and all aspiring comedians to come on down to the humble town of Berrybark and compete in this blast of a competition! Whether your specialty be stand-up…" The camera showed an animation of a stick-figure comedian making a joke on stage, causing all the stick figures in the audience to laugh out loud. "Sketch comedy…" Now two stick figures making faces in front of a camera on a tripod. The screen was flooded with little thumbs-up symbols and laughing-out-loud emojis. "Slapstick, clown acts, or even simple puns, all are welcome here!"

Lemmy gasped and perked up in his seat. "Hey, I like slapstick, clown acts, and simple puns!"

"That's right, all are welcome here! And once every one of you rib-tickling comedians come down to the Berrybark Shellturner Theater, you will compete in a tournament-style competition to win a million coins and title of the King of Comedy!" A crown floated in front of Rouge, glowing gold with the words "King of Comedy" plastered on it. With a sly smile, Rouge pushed the crown out of the way so that her face was in front of the camera again. "Or queen. We here at the Koopa Kingdom's Ultimate Laugh Off aim to be inclusive." She laughed again before addressing the audience one final time. "Anyway, prepare your punchlines and come on over to Berrybark by July 21st! I look forward to seeing you all here!"

With that, the video ended. The Koopalings exchanged looks, some incredulous, some enthusiastic. The Koopa who fell into the most extreme version of the incredulous camp was Ludwig. The Koopa who fell into the most extreme version of the enthusiastic camp was Lemmy.

"Oh my gosh!" Lemmy's eyes sparkled. "Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh!" He squealed before turning around to face the rest of his siblings. "I have to sign up for this!"

"I think you should!" Wendy said, mirroring his excited expression perfectly. "I mean, you're the Clown Prince of Koopas! Getting to prove that to an audience would be amazing!"

"It would!" Lemmy laughed, all evidence of his despair from earlier having flown right out the window. "So many people would be able to watch this event, so many people would be able to see me on stage… oh, this is perfect!"

"Yeah," Morton said. While not as vibrantly enthusiastic, he still gave an approving nod. "It would be a really neat thing to take part in."

"Yeah." Larry smirked. "Plus, it's taking place in Berrybark. And everyone knows how many famous people are in Berrybark." He laughed. "I'm gonna get all the celebrities in town to sign my Captain Metal costume and then sell it for millions!"

"Woah woah, wait just a second here," Roy said. He looked at the camera, frowning as he did. "I do think something like this could be fun, but… you know what they say, everything on the internet is a scam."

"You know, Roy brings up a good point." Ludwig stepped toward the camera. "Something about this Rouge Albertine lady kinda rubs me the wrong way. How do we know if she's legit? How do we know if we can trust her?"

At that very moment, Iggy walked into the room. Everyone turned toward him as he let out a breath of relief. "Finally, I found you guys!" He closed the door and walked over. "What have you all been doing? I've been trying to find you guys so I can have someone try on my new invention!" He reached into his hammerspace and pulled out what looked like a regular orange baseball cap. "It's called the Hat of Happiness. It's supposed to show everyone who wears it that their work is appreciated." He pressed a button, and the hat started to flash as brightly as possible and sing "You're special! You're special!" on repeat.

Ludwig snickered. "Yeah, I like baseball caps that look and sound annoying as much as the next Koopa, but we all were looking at something interesting." He gestured toward the screen. "This lady down in Berrybark is hosting something called the Koopa Kingdom's Ultimate Laugh Off."

"The Koopa Kingdom's Ultimate Laugh Off?" Iggy walked over to the screen. "Huh. That's something you don't hear… wait!" He zoomed over to the screen with wide eyes. "Is that… OH MY GOODNESS!" He squealed in delight. "It is! It really is!"

"What are you talking about, Iggster?" Larry asked.

Iggy turned back to his siblings, his excitement strong enough to dwarf Lemmy's. "Guys! That's not just any lady! That's Rouge Albertine!"

"Wait, you know who Rouge Albertine is?" Roy asked.

"Of course I do!" Iggy opened another tab and typed Rouge Albertine's name into the search bar. "Rouge Albertine is one of the most well-known and amazing actresses in all of Berrybark."

"Oh!" Ludwig put on a fake smile. "That explains why none of us have ever heard of her! Everything makes sense now!"

Iggy turned to Ludwig and sniffed at him. "Well, while the fact that you plebeians have been living under a rock isn't news to me, that does not discredit all the amazing things that Rouge has done." He clicked on a link, showing more information about Rouge. "Rouge Albertine started out simple enough. She was born in the Beanbean Kingdom and moved to the Koopa Kingdom in order to expand and grow her career. She put her foot into the comedy world with some AMAZING stand-up specials, including the iconic 'My Personal Beefs' and 'Funny in my Head.'" Iggy grinned at his siblings. "By the way, if you guys have never watched those, you NEED to give them a try." He chuckled again before turning back to the screen. "From there, she starred in many movies and TV shows. Including the greatest and best soap opera of all time… Heart to Heart!"

"Heart to Heart?" Wendy asked with a blink. "Wait, isn't that…"

"The one I watch on the regular? It is indeed, dear sister!" Iggy chuckled like he had just inhaled laughing gas. "She first appeared on the show as Bunny's childhood friend turned con artist in Season 5, and what started as a one-off character not only turned into one with a large and ever-expanding fanbase but also a role that has expanded and earned Rouge Albertine an award for Best Actress in a TV Program!" Iggy beamed. "Proof that Rouge Albertine is one of the most versatile and accomplished actresses in the world!"

There was a silence in the room before Morton snickered. "I dunno; I'm more so inclined to like Malaika Cielo myself."

"Personally, I like Azure Maisy," Roy said. "She kicked ass in 'With You By My Side.'"

Right as Iggy's face was falling was when Lemmy spoke up. "Wait. So… this person is legit and has actually experience in the field of comedy!" Lemmy pushed the chair closer to the computer, going back to the tab with the video they had been watching. "Then… then this thing isn't a scam! This thing is real, and there's actually a legitimate reason to sign up for this!" He turned back to his siblings. "Guys! I'm gonna do it!"

"You sure Lemmy?" Ludwig asked, his incredulity still not washed away.

"Yes!" Lemmy grinned. "I'm gonna compete in the Koopa Kingdom's Ultimate Laugh Off!"