Yu's POV
Something is missing.
I don't know what it is but it's like there's a hole in my heart, and I don't know how to fill it.
I've felt like this for a couple weeks now, but it got worse after my Heart to Heart with my fellow Wild Cards.
Why does it hurt so bad? I need a distraction.
I know! My song. I've been working on this song for about five months, but I'm stuck.
"But it didn't work, honey cuz we had a whole lot going on and on and on."
Rise... maybe...
Maybe nobody had to leave.
NO! I was the one who had to leave. Because she wouldn't do it, and life is too short... Is what I keep telling myself. But it still hurts. I really miss her. It hurts seeing her. Well no, I love seeing her, and I love being with her, but it hurts at the same time.
Just the thought of her being with someone else just... it terrifies me. Makes me dizzy, makes me feel sick to my stomach. Of course I would support her if she was interested in someone else, I want her to be happy. But... but...
I need a walk.
I started walking. I don't even know where I'm going. All that I have to accompany me is the crickets and occasional sound of cars. I walk up the hill by the house as I just look at the stars. I wish she was with me. They always used to shine brighter when I was next to her.
I can't get her out of my head! I even forgot about the song... wait. I said no one had to leave. That's actually pretty good.
Signs of love overshadowed by dreams
Baby, don't worry 'cause you ain't alone
Only time running days without nights
Tears pass through.
He said, "I'm the one who's got to leave", I said
"Nobody's really got to leave 'cause
I don't hear enough explanation
All I need is admiration'
Big frustration, bro, he goes
"Life is short, we gave a shot
But didn't work, honey, 'cause we had
A whole lot going on and on and on"
That's great! That's really great... but it feels like I have a weight on my heart.
Why does it hurt so much? It's fun to write, so why am I in so much pain? Why am I still thinking of...
I'm by the riverbank, I only realised I got distracted from the song writing again, I just keep getting lost in my thoughts. I just can't take this anymore!
"AHHHHHHHHH!"
"Senpai? Are you alright?"
Rise? She's here?
"Rise? What are you doing here?"
"I just needed a walk. I'll be beginning my photo shoot tomorrow so I wanted to say goodbye to Inaba before I left for Tokyo."
"Oh, well have fun in Tokyo. Maybe you'll meet Yuki and the Phantom Thieves while you're there."
"Yeah, maybe, but now it's your turn senpai, why are you here?"
"I just... needed a walk too."
"Okay, and what was the scream about?"
"I was testing my voice box?"
I suck at lying to her.
"Pfffft ahaaaaa!"
She bursts into laughter.
"It's not that funny."
"You're a terrible liar! AHAAAHA!"
"And you're trying to give Yukiko a run for her money with how much you're laughing."
"It's only you who brings it out of me funny man."
"I like your smile."
"It's one of the things I like about you."
We both say at the same time.
...
Is it hot out here?
Rise looks like she's just eaten a pepper.
She comes to sit next to me.
We just sit there in silence watching the moon in the sky. Gorgeous is not even close a word to enough to describe it along with its reflection in the water. But even the moon's majesty pales in comparison to the girl by my side, the lustrous light from the moon makes her face shine brighter than normal and it makes her eyes sparkle like stars in the sky. She is my world. It takes all the energy I can muster not to stare into her beautiful brown eyes. All I want to do is put my fingers through her silky hair and feel her smooth cheeks with my l-
"It's crazy how the moon is actually Nyx."
Well that snapped me right out of that.
"Pfttt HAHAHAHAHA! You're so random!"
"What do you mean? The moon is right there, it's just crazy to think about."
I need to catch my breath.
"I guess so. I can't believe Yuki was up there as the Great Seal."
"Could you imagine that? Being stuck up there for six years?"
"I have so much respect for him, he sacrificed himself for us all, he may be back now but he had no way to know that would happen."
"He reminds me of you actually."
"How? I don't see it."
"Well I can. You're both weird."
"Hey!"
"And you're both heroes."
...
"I'm no hero."
I'm a coward who can't face his own feelings.
"You are Yu, you're my hero."
She just knows how to make me smile, I want to make her smile, I want to make her laugh, I want to make her... I want... I want... I want to be closer to her! I lean forward.
She sees me coming and she closes her eyes. Does that mean... My heart starts racing as we get closer and closer. The smell of her perfume enchants me, and I can feel her warm breath on my lips. She has an effect on me. I can't think of anything other than...
"Kujikawa-San!"
That's her manager, he must be looking for her.
She sighs and stands up.
I feel like I just got smacked in the face.
"I gotta go Senpai, I'll see you in about two weeks."
"Bye Rise."
I just watch as she walks off. I feel... frustrated. Annoyed. Of course her manager had to come at that exact moment. I don't want to let her go.
As she meets her manager and gets in his car she just turns around and looks at me. She smiles and waves before jumping in. I wave back.
With my heart in shambles.
It was a bad idea anyway. Wait...
What was I about to do? Kiss her? Why? I broke up with her for a reason.
Was I right?
Then why does it feel so wrong?
I need time to think.
I need to talk to someone, Youske is the only one who knows the whole story but he's busy at Junes for the next week.
Wait. There's two more people who know, maybe I should pay them a visit.