In the end, when I tried to buy some healing potions and scrolls that provided buffs or inflicted status effects, Aqua pitched a fit because that was supposed to be her area of expertise. Acting as if using these items somehow diminished her role on the team, she refused to let me buy anything that would have actually been useful. It's not like she has ever been proactive in giving out buffs when we need them, either, but pointing that out just upset her more.

Ultimately, we couldn't settle on any items to purchase, so we left Wiz's store empty-handed.

"So what now?" I asked, once we were seated at our usual table in the guild. "We have less than a week until the Demon King's general arrives, and we have no strategy or plan. The letter didn't indicate he was planning to attack, but the rest of the guild seems to think he will, and I agree that it's better to be over-prepared than under."

"Let's go on a quest!" Komekko said. "The best thing we can do to prepare is to raise up our levels. That's what everyone else is doing!"

"It is?" I couldn't help but notice that the guild seemed unusually quiet today. Maybe Komekko was right and everyone was out grinding XP.

Alice promptly jumped to her feet. "I can go pick out a quest for today!" But before she could take another step―

"Lady Aqua! You're finally here!"

A feminine voice called out from across the guild hall.

I turned my head to see an attractive female priest garbed in a blue religious habit rushing toward us.

"I have been waiting here all day! It wasn't easy, the guild even tried to toss me out a few times, but I stayed on my best behavior in order to reach this very moment! Ah~!"

'All day?' Isn't it still mid-morning?

"Gah! Big sis Cecily, don't call for Aqua and then grab me so unexpectedly like that!"

"Ah, but when I saw your cuteness, I couldn't restrain myself! I just had to rub our cheeks together!"

"Like I said, cut it out!"

Having called for Aqua, this unanticipated stranger instead launched herself at Komekko the moment she was within striking range. Finding herself being squeezed up against the soft chest of the ample priestess, Komekko was too stunned to wiggle from her grasp.

"Komekko, you're so cute!" squealed the priestess.

I had to admit, the view was pretty great from here.

Oh, and watching Komekko's face turn red was satisfying in its own way.

"Ms. Cecily?! It's been ages!"

"Huh? No way! That long, blond hair, that lovely scent, could it be? Cute li'l Alice, is that you? Ehehehe! Alice, you've gotten so big! Uwu, you may be all grown up now, but you can still call me big sis Cecily, okay?"

Surprising the priestess (whose name was apparently Cecily) this time was Alice, who swept up both of them in an even bigger hug.

"Ah, what am I going to do? I only like little girls! Cecily, get a hold of yourself! Oh, but Alice smells so nice… Ah, this is bad! I'm stuck in an Alice-Komekko sandwich and I don't know which one I swing for! Hu, I suppose it's fine if they are both in my harem!"

Uh, should a priestess be saying things like that? Who is this person, anyways?

"Big sis Cecily, if you don't have any food for me, then let me go!"

"Oh dear me, my little Komekko, but we have bathed and even shared the same bed together! Hasn't our physical relationship progressed beyond the third wheel of food at this point?"

"Chomp!"

"Eep! Komekko, you're so rough! Ah, but I don't dislike being bitten when it's by you!"

"Satou, help! I've been captured by a truly frightening woman! She doesn't let go of me even when I bite her!"

…What. The. Hell?

"So you were looking for me, Cecily?"

"Yes, Lady Aqua. You see, a certain close friend of mine made a request to purify the lake."

"A 'close friend' of yours?" Komekko suspiciously questioned. "That sounds fishy."

"Komekko, it breaks my heart to hear you say such things! I have many dear friends both in and outside the Axis Cult! Like you and Alice! I'm not like the loner Yunyun, you know!"

"Hey, Komekko? Who is this lady, exactly?" I asked, intimating to the priestess who was busying herself with bothering us.

"She is a weirdo. You can just ignore her."

"How can you say that? Even if it's cute li'l Komekko, I can't let it slide!" Cecily slammed her fist on the table. Then, her eyes turned to me. "But you're a new face, handsome. I bet you're a rich adventurer! If so, then I'll gladly let you take care of me!"

Is―she hitting on me?

"Oh, Satou! You like older women, right? I know I said earlier I didn't know anyone who I could match you up with, but I had forgotten about Cecily! Is she your type? She is older than me, after all!"

Said Alice, looking so proud of herself for some reason. She must be remembering the unnecessary things Vanir had mentioned earlier. I appreciate that she is trying to be helpful, but when she is the one saying such things, it just hurts even more…

Besides, you don't have to be a genius to tell that this Cecily person was all kinds of crazy.

"Oh my, how bold of you, Alice!" Cecily cupped her cheeks and squealed. "Introducing me to a handsome young man? Wawawah, all my good deeds for the Axis cult must be paying off! Certainly, if you are rich, then I have no problems letting a young man like you pamper me!"

"Nope, I'm actually as poor as they come!" I could already see where this was going, and I could smell trouble.

"Oh! Is that so? Well, good luck with that."

Yep, she instantly lost interest in me. Whew. Dodged a bullet there.

This priestess seemed to be even less my type than Aqua, it didn't matter which of us were older and younger. My type really is just girls who are pure and kind, like Alice, and this lady is clearly not pure or virtuous at all. I don't know why people keep throwing age as a factor into the mix.

"Sorry it didn't work out this time, Satou," Alice said softly. "But don't worry! I won't give up, okay? I promise to make sure you find romance someday, Satou!"

Actually, it would be easier for me if you did give up, but I can't say that!

"If you want to be more popular with the ladies, I recommend getting rich. Of course, there's no easy way to do that, so the next best thing would be joining the Axis Cult! Here, just sign this form and you'll definitely shoot way up in the popularity rankings!"

Cecily said without me asking, while producing a pamphlet out of her inner robes.

"Aqua, do something about this lady!" I pleaded, trying to shove the leaflet out of my face. Take a little responsibility for your insane believers!

Speaking of Aqua, who was twirling a strand of hair around her finger, she said, "So when you say a lake, do you mean the one I purified with Kazuma a long time ago? Or the one where we fought the Kowloon Hydra?"

"The first one!" answered Cecily, being pushed back on track. "Apparently that lake is an important source of water for Axel. As I was saying, I myself was not up to the task, but when I prayed to the goddess, it was then that I heard you had recently returned to town! For Lady Aqua, purifying the lake should be no trouble at all!"

Ah, so this perverted, gold-digging woman was trying to rope other people in to solve her problems for her. Not very considerate for a woman of the cloth. Come to think of it, I am pretty sure I heard somewhere that the Axis Cult is full of frightening people. To the point that even the Demon King fears them.

I think I am beginning to understand why.

"No way! I'm never purifying that lake again! The last time I did, I was traumatized! The alligators… the cage… it was too scary!"

Aqua suddenly rejected Cecily's request. Although her statement claiming to be traumatized from an adventure checks out.

"I heard there was already a party of adventurers sent out to drive away the monsters from the lake, so it'll be fine! Please! Lady Aqua, nobody else but you can do it! "

Cecily got down on her knees and began to beg Aqua, her hands clasped as if in prayer. Aqua's face quivered, clearly conflicted.

"Well, if someone has already driven away the monsters, then I guess it will go differently than last time," she finally muttered. "Fine! What kind of a goddess would I be if I ignored it when one of my precious disciples begs me like this?"

"Thank you, Lady Aqua! Ah, my friend will be so happy!"

And so, at Aqua's insistence, we rented a large cage from the guild, like the sort you would use to keep animals contained in.

Or like the kind you would go shark-diving in, as the case may be.

"This cage is my sanctuary," Aqua had said, and had already climbed in it before we set out.

"Oi, Aqua, do you have to sit inside there like that while we're passing through the town? People are giving us some weird looks… Why don't you come out until we at least get to the lake?"

"No thank you," Aqua said simply. "This is the only place where I am safe."

If she got so traumatized from the last time she did this, why is she agreeing to it again? I don't get her at all.

"The door isn't actually locked, sorry to worry you, she just likes being inside the cage for some reason," I had to keep telling the people who stopped and stared as we passed by. Luckily nobody asked any further questions.

I worry sometimes that this town has a few too many weirdos. The fact that something like this is not enough to cause a disturbance is proof.

And so, once we left through Axel's gate, we made the trip out to the lake without incident.

"Hey, Aqua, how long is it going to take you to purify the lake?" Komekko asked while taking in the size of the body of water.

"Hm… it should be finished by the end of the day," she said.

"Aw, what about lunch? And dinner..." whined Komekko.

"Don't worry, Aqua! If any monsters are still around, I promise to protect you!" Alice boldly declared.

"No need. As long as I have this cage, everything will be okay…"

"...Okay, if you say so…"

Alice looked a little sad to be blown off by Aqua's wistful air.

Meanwhile, Cecily―

―had already fallen asleep under the shade of a nearby tree.

"Alright. Aqua, if you need anything, we'll just be right over there. Give us a holler, and we'll pull you out," I said, after making the final check that everything was in place.

The cage was now firmly set in a shallow spot near the lake's edge. It was still late morning, so all there was left to do was wait. Aqua sat there hugging her knees, still in the same position she had been in since she climbed in the cage.

"Haaa~" I stifled a yawn.

Nothing had happened for the past two hours. The weather was pretty nice, with a warm sun keeping the cool lake breeze in check. It was tempting to just doze off like Cecily, who was snoring without a care in the world.

"I need to take a bathroom break," I muttered in the direction of Alice and Komekko, who were lazily watching Aqua from the same shady spot Cecily had found. "Anybody else need to go?"

Komekko didn't even blink. "Crimson Demons don't need to go to the bathroom."

"What, like you're all idols, now?" I doubtfully snorted. I felt like saying, 'You eat so much, where does all that stuff go?'

Alice squirmed nervously, catching my attention. "Princesses don't need to use the bathroom, either. ―Ah! Not that I am a former princess, or anything! What I meant to say was, I also―as an adventurer... don't need to..." Her face kept turning redder and redder by the moment. "I mean, it wouldn't be good for a monster to sneak up on you, so an adventurer can't even let their guard down for a second..."

"Sigh..." Suddenly realizing I didn't want to know that Alice goes to the bathroom like the rest of us mere mortals, I wished I kept my big mouth shut. "Whatever. I'll just go find a bush or something over there. You two can do whatever you need to until I get back."

"Okay, be careful," Alice said. I lifted my hand in response to show I had heard her.

With that, I began pacing down the rocky shoreline, looking for a private spot.

After a few minutes, I found one sufficiently out of my party's line of sight, and quickly relieved myself. "Ahh. I wonder if Aqua will need a bathroom break also? Well, I guess she can just pee in the lake, if she wants. Ugh, better ask her when I get back, just in case."

Just then, I heard a noise. A twig snapping―or maybe a rock sliding? Whatever it was, I looked up―

And saw a girl's face peeking out from behind a tree trunk, staring directly at my zipper.

"I'm sorry! It was an accident! I heard a noise, and just came over to investigate―I promise, I wasn't trying to peep on you or anything!"

This girl had some rather distinct features that stood out in this fantasy world―dark hair, dark eyes, oh, and a big, colorful, butterfly-shaped hair clip which she wore on her brow.

In any case, after our eyes met for the first time, she instantly hid back behind the tree trunk and kept apologizing over and over, keeping the tree between us.

Isn't this trope supposed to be the other way around? It's embarrassing when I'm the one who was accidentally caught! I hurried and finished doing my business and pulled my pants back up with shaky hands.

"Sorry, I'm all finished now," I called. "Um, I'll go back to my party, so you can have this spot all to yourself, or whatever."

She timidly peeked around the tree to check if I was presentable, then sighed and stepped into full view. Her face was all red, but I figured mine was, too.

"I apologize again," she said, bowing deeply. "My party and I have been hunting some brutal alligators around this lake for the past few days, so I did not expect to bump into anyone." She bowed again and again. "Sorry! It was my mistake! I shouldn't have snuck up on you like that!"

"N-no, it's fine! I wasn't being careful enough, either!" My voice was shaking a bit, too. This girl was actually pretty cute, and seemed to be close to my age. "Um, well, I had better get going, so―"

"Tsumugi, is that you?"

"Tsumugi-chan, are you talking to someone? I thought I heard voices."

Suddenly, two boys, also around our age, walked out of the woods. They were both dressed as adventurers, with one of them carrying a spear, while the other guy held a magic staff.

Oh, now I recognized these three. I am pretty sure I bumped into them once while I was walking around town.

"It's alright, I just happened to stumble on this man while he was―um." Her face suddenly turned even redder.

"Tsumugi, are you okay?"

"Tusmugi-chan?"

"Anyways, my name is Tsumugi Matsumoto! It's nice to meet you! And I apologize again for startling you!" She gave one more polite bow.

I cleared my throat and tried to control my breathing. "Right. Nice to meet you. My name is―hk!"

Crap!

If I told them my name right now, after she just caught me with my fly down―

The normal thing to do would be to assume I was the Kazuma Satou, wouldn't it?

The Demon King himself, infamously known the world round for his numerous acts of sexual harassment.

"Your name is?" Tsumugi prompted.

Crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap CRAP!

"―M-m-my n-n-n-name is… Ah, what's that? I think I hear my companions calling for me! I better go tell them I'm okay! Sorry, bye!"

I dashed off, hoping I wasn't acting too conspicuous.

And so I quickly found myself back at the tree―

"Ah, Satou, welcome back."

"Satou, why are you out of breath? Did you run into a monster?"

Alice and Komekko were waiting there for me, just as I had last seen them.

"Hey, you!"

A voice suddenly shouted out to us from the direction I had just run from.

"Is that―a person in that cage? Who are you people, and what are you doing to―GODDESS!?"

Flinching, I turned around to see Tsumugi and her companions running up to us, only to catch a glimpse of the cage we had tied up to the side of the lake.

Crap. Given these circumstances, this must look like―

"Don't tell me you were planning on abandoning Lady Aqua!?"

Tsumugi yelled at me in a sudden fit of rage.