The President of the United States of America sat in the Oval Office. As he sipped a glass of water, he thought of all the crazy shit going on at that moment: global warming, the Israel-Palestine conflict, kids swallowing Tide pods, etc. It was all very anxiety-inducing. But he told himself he must remain resilient. He must stay calm and carry on.
When news of mutants such as Sonic first reached the public back in the early 90s, the president, then just a mere twentysomething citizen fresh out of college, really didn't know what to make of it. He was rather blindsided by the whole thing, as was the majority of the population at the time. Indeed, throughout his political career, it had never been very clear whether he was a friend or foe to the mutants.
The president's senior advisor entered the Oval Office.
"Sir… the Federal Reserve Building has been robbed," said the advisor, "Witnesses are saying Sonic is the perpetrator. FBI SWAT tried capturing him but failed to do so. However, they did succeed in capturing his friend and possible accomplice, Tails."
"What, you think I haven't already seen it all on CNN?" the president responded, "Where is Sonic now?"
"He was last seen crossing the border into Canada," said the advisor, "We didn't bother trying to ask the Canadians for their cooperation in catching him since we didn't think they'd have better luck than we did."
"Very well," said the president, "How much money are we talking?"
"Over a million dollars in assets, sir," said the advisor, "In both cash and gold bars."
"Well, as for the cash, can't we just print more money?" said the president.
The advisor chuckled.
"Sir, it doesn't exactly work like that…" he said.
"Why not?" said the president, "We're the government. Why couldn't we?"
"Uh, it's complicated, sir," said the advisor, "And even if we could just print more money, what about the gold?"
"What about the gold?" responded the president.
"How are we going to compensate for the loss of it?" said the advisor.
"Hell if I know," said the president.
"You don't sound very concerned, sir," said the advisor.
"I'm not," said the president, shrugging his shoulders, "I mean, we already owe China a bajillion fucking dollars. I'll let the next generations worry about our deficit."
The advisor looked at the president stunned, speechless.
"…Well, don't you at least think you should make some type of a statement to the American people?" said the advisor.
"Why would I want to do that?" said the president, leaning back in his office chair and putting his feet up on his desk and his hands behind his head.
"People are scared and confused," said the advisor, "They always thought Sonic was a hero."
"Yeah, well, tough shit," said the president, "What, have they never heard of Benedict Cumberbatch?"
"The actor?" said the advisor.
"No, the traitor," said the president.
"…You mean Benedict Arnold, sir," said the advisor.
"Yeah! That guy!" said the president, leaning forward, lifting his feet off his desk and onto the floor, and pointing his finger up in the air, "You know what I meant."
"On that note…" said the advisor, "We have reports from some of our top intelligence officers that it might not have been Sonic, but actually Shadow who robbed the Federal Reserve."
"And do they have any proof?" said the president, squinting his eyes.
"Nothing concrete, sir," said the advisor, "But there are odd coincidences. For example, the building where Shadow lives is reported to have been without electricity for the entire duration of the robbery. And the fact that Sonic fled the scene very clearly without any of the money he supposedly stole is also suspicious. The SWAT team found no trace of the missing assets in their hotel room either."
"He's the world's fastest living being. Who knows where he could have hid it all without anyone noticing?" said the president, "And what does the fox say?"
"Tails?" said the advisor.
The president nodded.
"Tails is currently in custody of the CIA… they report they've tried some new… interrogation techniques on him, but he swears he and Sonic are both entirely innocent and have nothing to do with the robbery. He has, however, confessed that Sonic told him shortly before the robbery that he wanted to kill Shadow."
"Well, at least they're testing out their new techniques on animals and not US citizens," said the President, sighing, "Very well then."
"So what do we do about Shadow?" the senior advisor said.
"Hmm…" said the president, scratching his stubble, "I have a deal with the Japanese. They said they'd be willing to lend Shadow to the military one day if we cooperated with them. I honestly don't know what they want in return, but if word of this unproven theory were to see the light of day, it would be bad for Shadow's image. Very, very bad, indeed… Do me a favor."
"Yes, sir?" said the advisor.
"Issue a bulletin across all intelligence departments demanding an immediate halt to any ongoing investigations regarding the robbery of the Federal Reserve," said the president.
"But, sir—" said the advisor.
"Very well," interrupted the president, cracking his knuckles, "Sonic is now public enemy number one and a terrorist at that. Have my speech written and delivered to me tonight so I can deliver it to the American people first thing tomorrow morning. I'll edit it as I see fit. Make sure Tails stays in CIA custody and that he stays quiet."
"Yes sir," said the advisor as he turned around to leave.
"And one more thing," said the president.
"Yes, sir?" said the advisor, turning back around to face the president.
"Do everything in your power to make sure the new Mutant Protections Act doesn't make it through Congress," said the president.
The advisor silently nodded, turned around once more, and walked out of the Oval Office.