To Sakura's great vexation, falling asleep was an impossibility that night. Gloomy thoughts and twisted rooftop images were chasing themselves around in her head like a whirlwind of leaves swirling around in a gust of wind. Sakura twisted and turned, her legs began to itch, then the top of her head, her feet, her hands…
"This won't do!" She exclaimed and switched on the tiny bedside lamp protruding from the wall in the on-call room. Past 2am, a glance at her wrist watch revealed. Great. With an exasperated sigh. Sakura buried her face in her hands. She really needed to sleep, she was already running low on energy without this Kakashi-focused insomnia on top! Why was she so preoccupied with him?
"Shouldn't have shown me your stupid face," she murmured, grabbing the bottle of water from the floor to drink deeply. A stale, bitter aftertaste remained in her mouth even after vigorously brushing her teeth. The entire village went out and partied on Friday evening but if she drank a few tiny cups of liquor, she had to pay for it like this?
Sakura swung her legs out of bed and stretched until her vertebrae popped. Why had her Sensei donned an Anbu uniform? That was the prize question. Surely, the Hokage wasn't allowed out on secret missions like this? But then again, who would tell the Hokage what to do and what not to do?
He was 'saving someone in the Cherry Blossom Lands', he had quipped when she had asked his purpose. Pffft. Seeing her lose her cool over that shitty book had greatly entertained him of course. Oh yes, he had a devious side and took great pleasure in pulling people's legs, she knew all about it!
Unnerved, Sakura grabbed the volume with the gaudy cover from the nightstand. Yes, maybe she had overreacted - this was 80 pages of nothing much. Then again, the pink-haired woman it showed had breasts that threatened the buttons of her shirt, a perfect hour-glass figure, and was winking stupidly at the reader like she wanted to share a bawdy secret. What was she, a sex symbol?!
Sakura flipped the book over to read the blurb at the back. "'In The Cherry Blossom Festival: Sakura's Time to Shine, Sakura finally gets the chance to attend the festival of her dreams, but discovers that the main attraction, the giant cherry blossom tree, isn't blooming. Determined to save the festival, she sets out with her friends to uncover the mystery behind the tree's lack of blossoms. This heartwarming adventure is filled with surprising use of chakra, friendship, and the beauty of the cherry blossom season.' Seriously, who wants to read shit like that?"
A great many people, apparently. "Over 500,000 copies sold!" A red sticker on the front declared. That had to be a lie, Sakura frowned, unless… mortified, she did the math. Sakura's Adventures was sold beyond Konoha?!
"Why does my life have to suck so much!" She groaned and picked up the hated volume to properly read it.
Well, Kakashi had been right, it was harmless. There was a bit of smooching and the one time she undressed, it was to take a shower. Also, Sakura soon realized that she didn't like her alter ego in the book at all because she hid her whiny and insecure self behind a rather bitchy exterior and yet, let herself be bossed around by her borderline abusive, neglectful boyfriend 'Shouta'. The only thing he had going for him were his staggering looks, the book said. Ouch. She would not dwell on this point any further.
Volume 4 ended with a clumsy cliffhanger: "As Sakura and her friends rushed to save the Cherry Blossom Festival, they came face-to-face with a mysterious figure lurking in the shadows. With a swift movement, the figure disappeared into the night, leaving behind only a small clue. Sakura picked up the clue, her heart racing with excitement and curiosity. Little did she know that it would lead her on an even more dangerous and thrilling adventure, one that would test her bravery and skills like never before. Would Sakura and her friends be able to solve the mystery and save the festival before it was too late? The answer lies in the next book of the Sakura's Adventure series…"
The teaser of Volume 5, A Blossoming Romance: Sakura's Love Story in the Cherry Blossom Lands, sounded like Sakura might actually ditch the boyfriend soon. It talked about a charming local with whom Sakura would embark on exciting quests together, making "Sakura begin to feel a connection that she's never felt before". Uh-huh.
"Wanna bet that exciting local is actually that mysterious figure who sabotaged the tree festival?" Sakura murmured. But no, she wasn't going to go to the bookshop to buy it. Absolutely not, she had her dignity.
But she was going to the roof.
That sudden decision came as a bit of a surprise to herself as well, it was very late after all… but the on-call room was stuffy and she just knew she couldn't fall asleep, so why not go and catch some fresh night air before trying to get some rest again?
And why not check whether a certain someone's clothes were still up there. Maybe he was safely back and she could stop worrying.
The hospital at night was usually very quiet, there were only a few nurses on night duty and one or two doctors on stand-by in case one of the patients needed urgent care. Sakura didn't encounter a single soul on her way up the stairs and was grateful. How would she have explained her nocturnal activities?
Kakashi's clothes were still there. He hadn't returned to pick them up.
"What are you up to?" Sakura sighed and picked up the tight ball he had placed underneath the chair as she sat down, face tilted upwards towards the starless sky. She felt a dull ache grow in her chest, an ache for a man who could not rest, who carried the responsibility for their village on his shoulders by himself so that the people of Konoha could live easy lives. What a cruel fate...
… She must have fallen asleep because she jerked awake when she heard voices.
"... never again, you hear me?" Kakashi sounded uncharacteristically angry with a voice that was gravelly and hoarse.
He's back! Sakura opened her eyes wide, but it was too dark to see anything. She found herself slumped over on the plastic chair, pain shooting through her neck and shoulder when she sat up. Which idiot fell asleep in such an uncomfortable position?
"It is my job to do that. Do you not know the meaning of bodyguard? I have to guard your body with my body."
Genma. Sounding like he tried to muster anger too but really couldn't.
"I am fully capable of taking care of my own body," Kakashi snapped. "Who came up with the idea that the Hokage needed bodyguards anyway? Isn't the Hokage supposed to be one of the strongest if not the strongest of his village? And isn't… Sakura, what are you doing here?"
"Oh," Sakura squeaked, foolishly feeling like she was caught doing something illegal, staring into his dark, tired eyes that appeared above her when he created a bright glowing ball in his hand. "I'm… I mean I wasn't… I wasn't waiting or anything…"
"It saves me the pain of having to fetch you," Kakashi said just as she became aware of the sweet, sickening scent of blood coming from him.
"You're hurt?" She sprang to her feet.
"He is," grimly, Kakashi pointed at Genma, who, she now realized, was using the Hokage's shoulder as support to hold himself upright.
"What happened?" She asked, switching into professional mode. Blood covered his right sleeve. All limbs attached. Was walking, though barely.
"Ah, it's nothing," Genma gritted his teeth and attempted to smile at her, managing only a lopsided grimace. A quick examination revealed that his right arm was broken - shattered, really, an ugly compound fraction that had to hurt like the devil.
"Help me bring him downstairs," she told Kakashi, beginning to mold chakra for this kind of operation. "There's an operating room close to the stairs on the 4th floor, I'll treat him immediately."
"It won't take long?" Genma asked, hopefully searching her face for confirmation as they made their way across the roof and down the stairs. Well.
"You won't come back to work for weeks," Kakashi destroyed his hopes, "because I'm sending you on an extended holiday to fully recuperate. I don't want to see your sorry ass anywhere near the Hokage Tower in the coming weeks, understand?"
"But Hoakge-sama, I…"
"What happened?" Sakura asked again, but the two men simply pressed their lips together. "I'm not interested in your secrets," she added angrily, "I need to know why his arm is like this to understand how to fix it."
"Boulder," Kakashi said grimly.
"Out of nowhere," Genma added weakly. "Had to…"
"Shut up," Kakashi sounded so resigned all of a sudden, Sakura threw him a worried look.
"You should wait in my office," she told Kakashi, "or better even, get changed and go home. This will take a while."
"I'm not leaving," Kakashi said. Two nurses who were coming to help threw him a look when they passed him, blushed, and giggled. That was very inappropriate, given that there was a wounded man present too, but Kakashi didn't seem to notice. Actually, he looked like he was sleep walking. And he was very pale.
"He's going to be fine," Sakura assured him, holding out his normal clothes to him. "It's not life threatening. Get some rest in my office. Please?"
"Alright," he frowned and took the bundle. "Okay."
###
Sakura expected him to be curled up on her treatment couch, fast asleep. That was what she hoped he would be doing, but Kakashi stood at the window and looked into the night that was going to end soon, turning around slowly when he heard the door. His Anbu mask dangled from his wrist. He hadn't changed, had not even shed his sword.
"The operation went very well," Sakura tried a smile though frankly, his martial grimness was a little frightening. "But Genma will be out for several more hours."
"Good," Kakashi said. "Keep him sedated. And make absolutely sure he understands that he cannot come back to work soon."
"He told me before going under to make sure Yamato takes over from him. Why is he this worried about you?"
Kakashi folded his arms and lifted his chin. "Because they are both annoying, that's why."
"It happened because he protected you?" She didn't need the two idiots to tell her anything, it was sufficiently obvious. Given Kakashi's past and what she knew about Rin and Obito, it was only natural that he would react with survivor's guilt to anyone stepping between him and a boulder. "He'll be completely fine, you can stop worrying."
"Can I?" His eyes were hard marbles in a pale face, his voice was dripping with sarcasm. "I guess it has to be true if you tell me."
"No need to talk to me like that," she snapped. "I may not know what is going on in detail but remember what you told me when I needed to hear it? 'You won't have to shoulder this alone.' So there. You won't have to shoulder this alone, Rokudaime. There are a lot of skilled shinobi in this village who will help you. I will help you."
He turned around again and just looked at her for a stretch of time, stormy eyes locked with hers. Sakura didn't look away though that would have been her instinct: What was he thinking that made him look like a descendant of Raijin and Fujin?
"I'll walk you home," he broke the loaded silence.
"Excuse me!?"
"You will sleep in my apartment as discussed and I will bring you there. Now. Your schedule has been cleared until 4pm and you will rest all day to regain some of your strength."
He was dead serious. Angering him further by putting up a fight didn't seem like a good idea and she was tired, her chakra reserves were low. She still needed to replenish her Seal for the next operation on her schedule, it wouldn't be easy.
"Okay," she concurred. "Let me grab a few things from the on-call room. I'll be right back."
###
The Hokage waited for her at the hospital entrance, the bundle of clothes underneath his arm. More nurses and hospital staff than usual were awake and about, milling around in an attempt to catch a glimpse of him in Anbu uniform. What a spectacle. If they didn't leave soon, her colleagues might approach him with requests for autographs. He did look dashing if one liked brooding, tall, fit men, the Anbu tattoo on his sculpted biceps glistening red in the artificial light. Not a fake, it signaled. The real deal. Danger.
"Let's go," Sakura said. And when they were a few steps away from the building, it broke out of her: "Anbu? Really? I thought you wanted to abolish them!"
"I want a great many things that I can't get, Sakura," he retorted. "The Anbu is a tool I can use and so I'm using it if it seems necessary."
"And you needed to be there? Physically? Dressed like this?"
"Yes," he replied curtly. "Absolutely. Before you go on, I'd appreciate it if you didn't nag and scold me, I have others for that."
Alright, then he'd get a doctor's opinion instead. "I made a list of options concerning a mental health check up. We didn't get to discuss it yesterday."
"Yes," he took a deep breath. "I'm aware and I'm sorry. Was it a lot of work?"
"Yes, a considerable amount, all done in my free time." She hadn't minded doing it but she didn't need to tell him that, did she.
"Maybe I need it," he murmured to himself. "I didn't even see that boulder coming."
That's no big surprise, you don't have the sharingan anymore, she thought but it was a touchy subject. He wasn't a lesser person because of it but she knew from comments that Tsunade had made that the adjustment had been difficult for him.
Before Sakura could say something appropriate, a bird began singing enthusiastically right above them, making them both look up at the same time.
"And so we danced the night away," he remarked drily.
"Ah, the famous ninja dance. Did you use your chakra to levitate, or did you stick to the classics?"
At least the weird tension was gone after they laughed together. They were almost at his place, Sakura remembered the neighborhood. She also noticed something else now that the dark of the night drew lighter. It was not easy to catch it, but the further they walked the more pronounced it became.
"Are you limping?" She exclaimed.
Denial was instant. "I'm not limping."
"You are limping! Let me examine you as soon as we're inside."
"It's really…"
"Oh, stop it," she fumed. "You men and your 'it's nothing'! Is it that hard to admit something hurts? I knew it wasn't a good idea for the Hokage to traipse about."
"Did you just say traipse?" He frowned at her.
"Yes, I did. Why? You don't like the word?"
"I don't traipse," he huffed but was quiet after that, clearly no longer trying to mask the fact that he was limping.
They walked through a nondescript front door of a four story building and up a flight of stairs. It smelled faintly of dog. She was the one with the key and he waited patiently behind her as she fumbled with it, failing several times to insert it into the lock. Why was she so clumsy?
The apartment was tiny. It was an ordinary, two-room flat with a bedroom facing West - a bed, a desk, some withered plants - a kitchenette and a bathroom containing a toilet, a sink and a shower. There wasn't even a balcony.
"This is smaller than the apartment Naruto had when he was a kid!" She remarked.
"The Third paid for that," Kakashi shrugged, finally taking the sword off his back and leaning it against the wall at the door. "Besides, I was never here much. It always sufficed."
"Sit down, please," She indicated the bed. It was a bit strange to invite him to sit down in his own apartment but they were past notions of 'strange' at 5am in the morning. "Let me have a look."
That he put up no resistance just showed how tired he was. He looked even paler than at the hospital, she noticed. This man needed to sleep. Even more than her.
"Tell me where it hurts?"
"Kind of everywhere?" he admitted.
"Did you get in contact with a boulder too?"
He shook his head.
"I'm not going to scold you," she frowned, "but let me tell you, professionally, that you're an idiot. You could have told me at the hospital, where I have equipment to treat you."
"Yeah, I think you know how much I like hospitals," he murmured. "Besides, I have been living with pain for as long as I can remember. It's normal for me."
"Take that armor off," she said. What to even say. Pain was normal? Well, it shouldn't be.
"So your icha icha collection is at the Tower?" she tried to make conversation as he slowly undressed. His hands were shaking.
"Storage," he said. "I have no time to read anymore."
"That's just sad," she sighed. "As your doctor, I prescribe reading for mental well-being, Rokudaime. You'll start tomorrow."
"Ah, and what should I read? Sakura's Adventures? Someone whose professional opinion I happen to cherish almost caved my head in when she suspected me of having done just that."
"Haha," she snickered. "I read the volume you gave me. You're right, it's harmless. I give you permission to read it too, if you want. I brought it with me."
"You read it?"
"Well, I couldn't sleep," she murmured apologetically. He was done shedding the armor pieces and long gloves, his eyes halfway closed. His breathing, she now noticed, was shallow and too rapid. There were no visible wounds. Best check for internal damage because something was wrong, that much was clear.
"This might feel a little intrusive at first," she warned him and took his hand.
Mistake.
A jolt of electricity shot up her arm, causing such a sudden and intense contraction of her muscle, she pressed his hand way too hard, feeling the bones shift and almost break.
"I'm sorry," Kakashi jumped up. "I'm so sorry."
She stared at him, his hand still in hers, her arm tingling crazily. "That's the second time this has happened," her voice shook a little. "What's wrong with your chakra control?"
"I… I don't know," Kakashi swallowed heavily.
"Lie down," she ordered him sternly. "I'm going to do a thorough examination again and I will keep looking until I find something."
She did notice something, but only after she looked for a second time. There were traces of a foreign substance in his blood. Her first thought was that she was seeing the alcohol she had given him - in hindsight, how irresponsible of him to take it! - but when she looked closer, it wasn't.
"Did you take any drugs?" She asked him.
"Not once in my life," he murmured groggily.
Hm.
"Let me see whether I can draw it out," she said, "lie still."
But that was an altogether unnecessary command - he had fallen asleep. What a classic, she smiled, watching his chest rise and fall. A guy offered her his apartment to sleep in just to fall asleep in it himself.
"You need your rest," she whispered and very gently sent her chakra into his bloodstream.
###
Kakashi wouldn't have rejected more sleep in his life categorically - but sleeping usually meant dreaming and dreaming usually meant horrid nightmares so that he frankly didn't mind only getting three, four hours a night. That way, he never got to the dreams he could remember. If they plagued him nonetheless, he could deal with them of course he could (except perhaps the Tsukoyomi dreams. They were the worst). Life had thrown so much emotional turmoil his way he had become immune to it years ago. Still, some of his dreams managed to infect his days with their poison, leaving him with dark thoughts and nagging self-doubts.
All the more surprising that Kakashi found himself in a very pleasant dream for a change. It was so pleasant he immediately recognized it as a dream, which was paradoxical and left him mildly amused. How was it possible to dream and know you were dreaming without waking up?
Maybe because I don't want to, he thought.
He was tied to an examination table with strong chakra bonds and couldn't move. The chakra bonds left a sizzling sensation against his naked skin, kind of setting him on edge, but it wasn't entirely unpleasant.
Tsunade was there, her glorious breasts barely covered. The woman had breasts a man wanted to bury his face in for the rest of his life. He knew they were too big for his hands with nipples that swelled to the size of pine cones when teased the right way, with the distinct taste of salty caramel. The Godaime had thighs that could press the life out of any man before he could even think to defend himself. When she wrapped her legs around you, you were in acute and true danger. It made things… hm, interesting and exciting.
"My cute, eager puppy," she purred, booping his nose. "How are we today?"
He wanted to tell her how much he appreciated a dream like this, but he couldn't speak. Apparently, she had also gagged him with chakra. Interesting. That was something new.
"Come, it is your turn, student of mine."
Sakura?! A glowing apparition of pink and green appeared before him - was she floating?! - the Strength of a Hundred Seal's marks covering her face and arms, disappearing down the decolletage of the pink nightgown like she was wearing. The rather… translucent pink nightgown.
Since Kakashi knew he was dreaming, he also knew that this was going in a direction he simply couldn't allow his dream to go. He didn't lust after other people's women. Never. He hated messy relationships and this… this was not going to happen. Only that this was his rational mind's line of thinking whereas his not so rational mind… Want. The irrational mind salivated. Want very much.
"I will instruct you how to care for him," Tsunade clapped her hands excitedly. "His biggest pleasure comes from pleasing others, which is a big plus for us."
"Yes, Shishou," Sakura smiled fondly and began opening her nightgown. "I cannot wait."
"Oi! Oi, Kakashi!"
"Not now," Kakashi murmured, he really wanted to see what his dream mind thought was underneath that night gown and then, he really wanted to find out what his dream mind thought Tsunade would teach Sakura about him because...
Pain.
"Ouch, you rat!" Kakashi shot upwards, Pakkun dangling from his hand, his sharp little teeth buried deeply in it.
"Mhmmmmggaridabllll," someone next to him mumbled. Someone warm and soft and very close.
Kakashi froze, his breath wanting to stop. Sakura. I'll be damned.
"What have you done to her?" Pakkun accused him, having let go of his hand that showed angry red bite marks, and quickly jumped to a safe distance before Kakashi could grab him.
"Psssst," Kakashi admonished the dog sharply and quickly put two water globes around Sakura's ears to block out the sound. She was wearing all her clothes. So was he.
Ugh. What the fuck happened. He felt dizzy and disoriented. Sakura had an arm draped across his body, now resting against his stomach, as if sharing a bed with him was the most natural thing in the world. This… was his old apartment and… things came back to him in a rush. So she fell asleep? As did I?
"This is not a good idea," Pakkun looked mighty displeased.
"Nothing happened," Kakashi said. Right. Just two very tired people falling asleep on the same bed. But if someone saw us go in and not come out… "We're both fully clothed, see?"
"You slept on the same bed with her," Pakkun accused him. "And you smell like you want to mate with her. I know what that means with humans. It's not good."
"Just shut up," Kakashi groaned. No, it didn't mean anything, but then again, it did. He had to get out of here as quickly as possible before she woke up. "What time is it?"
"It is 9am. You missed two meetings. Last time I saw him, Yamato looked like he's going to explode."
"Okay. Okay, I'm coming."
He'd have both his ears chewed off, but that was the least of his worries. Carefully, he disentangled himself from Sakura and got up. He felt much better than a few hours ago. Whatever she had done, it had helped.
"Make sure she has something to eat when she wakes up," he told the dog. "Something good."
"Ah, and should we give her some kisses from you too?"
"Oh, shut up, Pakkun," Kakashi groaned and quickly left his old apartment to attend to all the problems he knew had multiplied over night.