There was a certain empty wasteland, aside from a few others, that contained very little good memories for Gohan. Some had him stand by and watch helplessly as his friends dies around him, some saw him lose all manner of sense in in a blazing fit of rage, some saw him just stand there as he watched two dudes fight on for what felt like forever while doing nothing. But this wasteland he was flying straight towards was exceptionally dreadful for him: this used to be the sight of the Cell Games arena, this was where his father died.
"Hey, Gohan?"
The voice of Krillin caused Gohan's head to snap to the right. There was an appropriate look of concern on the short adult's face. But Gohan turned away before Krillin could ask the obvious."I'm okay, alright? What do I have to be afraid of?" he said, focusing on the land ahead.
"You've got plenty to be afraid of," replied Tien."We all do."
Krillin, Yamcha, Tien, and Gohan saw Piccolo come into sight, standing at the center of the massive crater where the arena once existed, floatnig all the way down to the ground before the Namekian, his white cape waving in the dusty wind.
"Dende, I can't stand this place..." sputtered Yamcha, wrapping his arms around his person as if he were cold."I feel like any second now, one of Cell's kids are gonna latch on to me and explode."
"Why are we here, Piccolo?" Tien broached.
"I apologize if I called you here on short notice," began Piccolo.
"I was studying for the SAT," Gohan said.
"I have base ball practice!" Yamcha complained.
"Me and Chaotzu were waiting in line for Cats," added Tien.
"You honestly think I can leave 18 alone with Master Roshi for one second!?" Krillin exclaimed.
"OKAY!" thundered Piccolo."I apologize that I called you here on such short notice, but we have a real emergency going on."
"Which is?" asked Krillin, the suspicion of heading home only to discover a black mushroom cloud in the middle of the ocean where Kame House once stood growing ever more probable.
The Namekien took a deep breath."Whatever I am about to tell you, you must promise me, not to lose your cool. Understand?" he eyed his peers carefully.
"Bruh!" Yamcha smirked."Give your boy Yamcha some credit, man; it's me!"
"Very well then..." he paused."About two weeks ago, in the dead of night, in the very spot I'm standing on right this moment, for the briefest second..." even he has to brace himself "...I sensed Cell's energy."
Toph scratched her ear, thinking she heard screaming for a second.
Feeling like Appa needed a little more time to recover from Sokka's haymaker, the Gaang decided to stoop down to level of normal people and take the train all the way to the inner wall, the bison lying comfortably on top of the train. Tarble didn't mind, as he enjoyed the view of the vast expanse of grasslands and animals. Sokka didn't feel like flying, his chest crippled by the idea of whatever happened to Azula happened to himself. Vegeta, on the hand, was notin the train nor flying, but having assertively given a few earthbenders the day off, it was he himself that was pushing the stone train car along.
Vegeta didn't feel like talking to anyone; he wasn't angry, he didn't feel like parting the clouds with some earlobe-destroying yell, nor pretending Sokka was Kakarot and beating him up as a poor excuse for training, he didn't even feel like training. Frankly, the Saiyan was dissapointed in himself. He'd lost to Cell again, not because he wasn't strong enough, but because he was stupid enough to break the simplest rule of fighting, to waste all of his energy in a fit of rage. For Kai's sake, he chided Nappa for doing just that! And now, apparently, Ghost Frieza...If the fall would kill him, he'd definitely jump.
Needless to say, they passed through the inner wall with not a hitch, and Vegeta had to admit, it was an impressively large city; it would likely take his full power to blow it up, not that he felt like doing that; he tried his best no think about the whole limited power-thing as to avert worsening his mood even further. The Saiyan just stopped the car more of less next to the station where the stupid kids and his stupid brother disembarked, not even considering giving Vegeta so much as a "thank you".
As Vegeta climbed out of the railing, a couple men in dark green robes appeared to his left.
"Thank you for your services," one of them said."We will kindly escort your sky bison to the nearest stable."
"There better not be a scratch on it when I get back," Vegeta grumbled, tossing them the bison whistle like keys to a valet.
"Back in the city; great..." lamented Toph.
"What're you talking about? This city's amazing!" the confused Sokka defended.
"Just a bunch of walls and rules," Toph grumbled,"Trust me, you'll get sick of it too in a couple of days."
"Well, I might not be able to speak for you," said Tarble,"but I can't tell you how relieved I am to finally pass the threshold of civilization, after all this time roughing it out in the dirt."
At this, Toph rested her fist onto her hips."And what exactly is wrong with dirt?" she inquired irately.
Tarble grew nervous."Duh, i-it's just, erm, a Saiyan thing...?" he said, twiddling his thumbs.
"Oh no, look out everyone, the little blind girl is triggered," Vegeta mocked in such a tone that one would think he was covering for Mai."If you miss the bush so much, you can turn your ungrateful ass right around and leave, because I am light years away from the mood that'll enable me to tolerate your stupid-AAAAAAAAAAHHHH!"he shrieked, frightening the group.
The moment he had turned around to point at the inner wall, his attention was arrested (and his heart was stopped) by the the mysterious woman standing mere inches from his face, her cheeks practically vanished to reveal a most unnaturally wide smile.
"Greetings, Vegeta,"greeted the woman mechanically."I am Joo Dee."
"Who the f$^ are you and how the f$% do you know my f%$#ing name?" was the stunned Vegeta could say.
"I have been given the honor of giving the Avatar a tour through our wonderful city," the mannequin of human being elaborated, walking towards the group.
Sokka was the first to approach."Listen to me carefully; your city's in great danger: there is a powerful alien incectoid being that has joined the Fire Nation in trying to take over your city. We need to speak with the Earth King right now." he explained with utmost seriousness.
"Great!" responded Joo Dee."Let's begin our tour!" she announced as she walked away from the confused Sokka.
"Ahem, did you not hear what I just said?" Sokka queried."The city's in danger; we need to speak to the Earth King."
Joo Dee then turned back on her heel, peering into Sokka's soul."You're in Ba Sing Se now - everyone is safe here." she replied with the same emotionless smile, spinning back around.
The group looked among eachother in perplexity.
"Tarble, if somewhere down the line you lose your clothes, don't blame me for it..." the prince advised, keeping an eye on the woman.
Vegeta had narrowly been convinced into entering the same carriage as the macabre faced wench to tour through the various "quaint and lively" areas of the city, the first naturally being the city's ghetto, wrought with the poor, sick, homeless, and outright criminals.
"This is the Lower Wall," Joo Dee explained,"This is where our newest arrivals live. As you can see, Ba Sing Se has many walls; the walls that protect us, and the walls that separate the citizens by class and maintain order."
"Don't be so confident in your walls," Vegeta said sarcastically,"It's only a matter of time before a lower class citizen trains hard enough to surpass an elite, and becomes even more powerful than your prince."
Joo Dee, still smiling, blinked."I don't get it."
The Saiyan sighed, staring at his feet sadly."Neither do I."
Piccolo took slow, deep breaths, standing perfectly still in the same spot, his green arms crossed, trying his damnedest to ignore the group of highly trained and disciplined martial artist run around the clearing in circles, flailing their arms wildly like a bunch of whiny bitches, all while the actual child quietly stood next to him. The Namekian managed just barely to tolerate their reaction for about ten minutes before paralyzing them with his eye beams. He stared at them, their limbs twitching and their mouths foaming."God, I miss Vegeta..."
"How-bzt-the-bzt-hell do-tzt-expect us-gxt-to react!?" Krillin sputtered."You just told us PERFECT CELL is ALIVE!"
"Do you see Gohan right here!?" Piccolo demanded, pointing down to the boy."This kid heard exactly what I just said, and he is perfectly calm, unlike you! THAT'S what I expect!"
"Of course he is!" cried Yamcha."If HE runs into Cell again, he'll just kill'em! Now US on the hand will probably get beaten to death by another gang of blue Cell babies!" he then turned to the bald man lying next to him in disappointment."Course I still expected more from you, Tien..."
Tien looked off to nowhere in particular."I was just doing it because you guys were..."
"STOP WHINING AND GET THE HELL UP!" the Namekian roared, as the three begrudgingly rose to their feet,standing like a trio of convicts preparing to be executed by firing squad."Now, I only felt his powerlevel for a moment, but I knew it was his; if he's alive, we need to find him."
"But how is that possible, Piccolo-sama?" ask Gohan."How could it have been only for a moment?"
"Maybe he was only alive for a moment, and then dropped dead again! Right?" Yamcha considered." I'm right, aren't I, Guys?" he nervously shifted his head back and forth between Tien and Krillin."Guys...?"
"Or..." Piccolo grunted."...he used Instantaneous Transmission to vanish as soon as he miraculously came back to life."
"But that's not possible!" Krillin shouted."There was nothing left of him after Gohan finished him off! He was destroyed, down to the very last...particle!" he reminded, resisting the easy pun.
"I'm not so sure," Piccolo said, as he stared at the ground."Cell's body may have been vaporized, but that wasn't the last trace of his DNA..."
"What, did you find a urine sample?" Yamcha joked."There's nothing left!"
"Then what is this?" Piccolo asked, producing the disembodied head of a Cell Jr.
Again, Toph scratched her ear.
The tour had continued through both the middle and upper class sections of the city, neither of which impressed Vegeta. It was clearly beginning to where on Sokka. Every single time he attempted to mention any kind of dire news to their hostess, it was as if she had spontaneously become deaf for that particular moment. Vegeta was wondering when it was going to occur to the dense teenager that she was simply ignoring him; why, Vegeta did not know; all he knew was that his desire to place as many kilometers between himself and this so-called human as possible had quickly exceeded his current powerlevel, which he was starting to fear might have diminished to a degree that he could no longer use units of Raditz to measure ;he might even be barely more than a Yamcha - Vegeta suddenly clutched his heart.
This train of thought then connected added a caboose of an epiphany: it just occurred to Vegeta that there was something else lacking from his list of awesome abilities. Spanning the entirety of this odyssey of pure madness, the Saiyan had not once sensed a single ki signature, be it from the stupid children, the stupid princess, or even his stupid brother. The realization hit him like a Death Beam through the heart; how could he have not noticed this until now? It could have been due to his lack thereof for most of his life, up until his arrival on the previous Earth (come to think of it, how did he even learn the technique to begin with?) He could only assume Cell had also picked up on this, he shouldn't think otherwise.
The tour apparently having ended, Joo Dee walked them up the steps to a moderately pleasant home.
"Hm," noted Tarble,"What a moderately pleasant home."
"I'm glad you are pleased. It is yours now." said Joo Dee.
Out was Vegeta's train of thought, and in came an old sputtering jalopy of confusion."I beg your pardon?"
Joo Dee directed her hand to the house."This is your new home."
The Saiyan stared at the woman as though she had fought and killed a giant three-headed space dragon single-handedly."Since when was I looking to purchase a new house?"
"Oh no, you misunderstand," Joo Dee shook her head."I'm am not selling it to you: it is yours, you live here now."
"I-you-tha-Since when!?" demanded the bewildered Saiyan.
"Since right now." Joo Dee said. Just then, a messenger ran up to the strange woman, and handed her a scroll, which she happily unfurled without question."Good news! Your request to speak with the Earth King has been processed."
"I never even-!"
"It should be put through in about a month!" remarked Joo Dee.
"A month!?" Sokka gaped.
"Six to eight weeks, actually," she corrected herself.
"That's two months!" Tarble remarked.
"What part of 'you're all going to die' doesn't translate well into Pycho-Bitchenese!?" ask Toph.
Joo Dee closed her eyes, thus completing her anime grin."Don't be silly. This is Be Sing Se; the only deaths we will have here is of ripe old age; there's no war here, all of us are safe here."
"Ms Joo Dee," Katara began," I don't think your understand-"
"There's nothing to understand," Joo Dee cut her off."We are safe."
Sokka pointed to her."Not safe from Cell you're no-!"
"We are safe."
Tarble raised his hand."We're talking about beings who could briskly fly over your walls any time they please-"
"We are safe."
Aang fluing his arms to the sky."Your one and only edge over your people's sworn enemy has effectively been negat-!"
"sssssssssaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaffffffffffffffeeeee..." Joo Dee breathed, her whole body gradually sliding away from the house without moving her legs, disappearing behind the carriage, which rolled off down the street.
The group exchanged highly disturbed glances, their faces notably perspired.
"...I wanna go home..." Tarble muttered.
"...you are home..."
Tarble yelped.
"hhhhhmmmmmmm..." sounded Dr. Briefs, his fingers stroking his light lavender beard.
After successfully preventing the three humans from incinerating the only evidence of Cell's return upon sight, they had brought their "sample" over to Capsule Corporation for analysis. With Bulma still not in the mood for work, they settled for the second smartest human on earth to observe the head and see what he could gather from it. They stood around the doctor, practically breathing down his elderly neck as the old man stared at the head, floating in a glass tube full of liquid, in total focus, working with his supercomputer as it scanned the creature down to its last atom.
"Well now," Br. Briefs broke the silence,"After thorough study, I can confidently say, without a drop of doubt..."
The Z Warriors remained completely silent, caught in a matrix of raw anticipation, their minds electrified by countless questions: would the Cell Jr. reconstitute itself? Would it grow up to become another Perfect Cell? Were inhabitance of this entire planet unwillingly poised to face a coming army of all powerful perfect beings?"
"...that this is a Cell Jr."
The warriors slammed to the ground anime style.
"On a side note," Briefs happily raised a finger."I've been working on a vaccine to treat this mysterious 'falling down whenever someone says something stupid' affliction; would any of you like to serve as a test subject?"
"NO, You idiot!" Piccolo shouted, clenching his fist."We want to know if Cell could have used this Cell Jr. head to revive himself!"
"Is that what you wanted?" Briefs asked, before taking a fleeting glance at the head."Nope, it's dead."
The warriors breathed in relief.
"But I don't get it," Gohan reminded."How did Piccolo-sama sense Cell's energy?"
"You don't think somebody wished him back to life, do you?" Tien considered.
"Who the hell would do that!?" Yamcha demanded.
"Maybe it was Krillin's new girlfriend..." The three eyed person tossed a accusatory glance at the short bald human.
"Are you kidding me!?" Krillin gaped."Why!? So she could get eaten again!?"
"Coulda' been Mr. Satan," thought Yamcha,"Maybe he wanted to defeat Cell for real..."
"Somehow, I doubt he's that upset about losing and living to tell about it, especially considering he told no one he lost." said Piccolo.
"Hang on," realized Gohan,"I still have the four star ball at home; nobody could have done it!"
"So how's Cell alive!?" Yamcha again demanded.
Piccolo stared at the head is deep thought."If he didn't regenerate," he looked at Gohan."And it wasn't the Dragon Balls, there's one other way we can tell if he's alive..." the Namekian looked to the sky ", We need to talk to Dende."
The group sat about the living room generally doing nothing. Aang played with Momo, Sokka propped his legs on the wall as his upper body lie on the floor, and Tarble one in a while peered out the window to make sure Joo Dee hadn't returned. The irony, Vegeta thought as he drank from his glass, nailed him in the face harder than Broly ever could: off he went, away from that house, and that dreadful planet of weaklings, his best to get as far away from them and her as possible; and now hear he was, in another house, on another dreadful planet full of weaklings of seemingly the same species, the difference being no gravity training room, no one worth training with, no more advanced privileges than running water, and no beautiful, intelligent, charming, funny, and all around wonderful woman that he felt comfortable enough to bear his feelings to-WOAH! He spat out another drink of unknown composition! Just where the hell did that string of adjectives come from?
Just then, Katara ran through the front door, carrying a rolled up paper and a smile on he face."I've got it! I know haw we can see the Earth King!"
The Saiyan just groaned like an old man nagged by his wife about the leaky bathroom sink."Why do you damn morons even want to bother with that? You act as if this king could destroy Cell and Ghost Frieza with his pinky finger."
"Look, Vegeta," began Sokka," I know things have changed with you around, but there's still the war going on - our war. We have one chance to invade the Fire Nation before the comet comes, and we can't let Cell get in the way."
"Here we go again about your stupid war!" Vegeta flung his arms to the ceiling. "Your planet could be wiped from the plain of reality any moment, and all you can think about are politics!" he vaulted himself off of the floor."I'm sick of hearing this crap!"
"This 'crap' is what wiped out the Air Nomads!" Toph threw her own finger at Vegeta."Just because the Fire Lord can't destroy a mountain doesn't make him harmless!"
"But do you know who has destroyed a mountain?" asked the irritated Saiyan walking up to Toph and looming over her,"Me. And do you know who else has conquered a world? ALSO me!" he pressed his thumb against his chest.
Tarble's attention was gained. He leapt from his window monitoring position, the nervous Saiyan waving his hands as a signal for his brother to change the subject."Um, brother..."
"I've spent my twenty five years taking over entire planets, crushing all feeble resistance, and selling them to Freiza!"
"You sold people?" Katara gaped.
"No," Vegeta glared at the waterbender,"The planets! To a being that didn't take prisoners or slaves-get my meaning?"
Katara did, and so did Aang; their stunned eyes were evidence of that.
"I used to be the kind of person that you yourself would have given your pathetic lives trying to defeat!" Vegeta went on as he marched for the door."I have no stake in this conflict; the only reason I ever cared about the Fire Nation was because of these," he tugged the collar of his suit."The only reason you insects are still alive after meeting me," he opened the door,"Is because I physically couldn't annihilate you on the spot WHEN I WANTED TO!"
The house was rocked with the slamming of the door...
...then the door creaked and fell off its hinges, allowing the Gaang to see Vegeta as he walked away. Vegeta turned his head back, saw the Gaang, and shouted various explicitives as he flew away to make sure he could not be seen.
Everyone was frozen by Vegeta's tirade.
"ummm..." blinked Toph,"context?"
Later that night, The Saiyan had stopped flying somewhere around the city's middle wall, and resigned to walking once again. He insensitively pushed passed just about every citizen he could. He wanted to just fly out of the city itself, but where exactly was he supposed to go? Nowhere, that's where. He was trapped, no matter where on this rock he went. He couldn't even use a spaceship to leave; all he could do was continue to aimlessly pace throughout Ba Sing Se, with no end in sight. The only thing stopping the Saiyan from plummeting into a steaming vat of depression was the hope that he would figure out how to get off this planet before dying of tremendously long Saiyan age. Not impossible, Dad did it. Perhaps he just needed to construct a kind of craft that was distinct from the one he crashed in; maybe what he could do was build a pair of primitive rocket silos onto his ship and use that to ascended out of the world's atmosphere, and the spaceship would function for there. That had to be how King Vegeta got away. Now all this Vegeta had to do was find a rocket scientist; definitely going to have to wait it out for a century or two...
"What I wouldn't give for a decent cup of tea right now..." Vegeta vocalized, as long as it wasn't his ki he had to give away. As soon as he turned to the left, he saw a tea shop. He blinked."WHAT I WOULDN'T GIVE TO HAVE MY FULL POWER BACK!" He screamed at the black sky with wide open arms...
...many citizens tried not to stare at the man...
"Right," huffed Vegeta,"Jinxes don't work that way..."
Zuko was minding about his business, serving steaming cups to his respective customers, when suddenly, a certain someone bashed the front door down with his foot.
"I DEMAND SUSTENANCE!" thundered Vegeta.
The startled Zuko accidentally spilled hot water onto a wealthy customer's loins.
"IT"S HIM!" Cooler shouted, his metaphysical eyes bugging out.
"Him who!?" exclaimed Zuko.
"SH! Don't make a sound! Don't even make eye contact!" demanded Cooler.
Iroh zipped over to the Saiyan, bowing respectfully."Welcome to our humble tea shop; may I show you to your seat?"
"You may, human..." answered Vegeta, inwardly please to have someone serve him.
Iroh led Vegeta over to an empty seat in front of the bar; despite this, Vegeta noticed an old lady sitting next to that seat, and promptly shoved her clean off her own seat, the Saiyan sitting in that one briefly perturbed Iroh cleared his throat."Would you like some ginseng or jasmine?"
"I'll take some passion flower if you have it," Vegeta said."And if you do not, I will annihilate this building and everyone in it." he claimed, though he was too mellow to possibly mean it.
Regardless, Iroh nodded."Ah, just a minute," the old man replied, walking around the bar and gathering the right herbs."So, passion flower," he noted, heating up some water with a pair of spark rocks,"a great tea for depression. If I may, you look like a man who is clearly depressed."
"So what if I am?" Vegeta asked."You have a problem with it? Am I not welcome here?"
"Well I wouldn't know, I just started working here today," Iroh said, pouring the hot water into a cup of herbs."But I do know despair; he is an old enemy of mine. I was nearly consumed by it, if it weren't for the miracle that is tea," he happily laid said tea in front of the Saiyan.
Vegeta just stared at his reflection in the warm liquid."If your trying to figure me out, tubby, I should let you know that you could not even fathom my woes..."
"You say that," said Iroh."But perhaps you are not quite aware of the source of your own woes..."
"I will make it as simple as possible," Vegeta began."I used to be something incredible, I was unparalleled; then it was all stolen from me in the snap of a finger, and I don't even know how."
"Isn't that always the case..." Iroh stroked his beard."I used to be someone special as well," he poured himself some tea."Though I suppose it wasn't taken from me; I just sort of left it behind."
"Then you're a fool."
"Maybe..." considered Iroh."But even loss can be a great teacher: when I had that power; what I was before, I could not see the folly of my own ways, and it cost me...a lot..."
"I have gained nothing from my loss," stated Vegeta frankly."Only an endless stream of suffering. I don't even belong here"
"m", sounded Iroh,"I used to think I didn't belong here either; I certainly know my nephew feels he should be here" he shook his cup around in a circle."But destiny is interesting that way. A long time ago, when I was still great, I was here before, and I definitely thought it was fate that brought me here," Iroh closed his eyes."But then, tragedy struck me like a lightning bolt - again something I am highly familiar with - and I was force to believe fate was wrong."
"And yet, here you are still," replied Vegeta.
"I don't know why, being here just brings back unwanted pain," admitted Iroh."But perhaps, I needed to return, so that I could heal from that pain."
"So what are you getting at?" Vegeta asked."Do you mean that I'm supposed to be here? It was fate that caused my spaceship to crashland on this planet and rob me of my Super Saiyan power?"
At this, Iroh had no choice but to be frozen in bewilderment."I...er...don't think we're talking about the same thing..." he admitted, looking away.
"ENOUGH WAITING!" shouted a young voice that caught everyone's attention. Vegeta turned to see some teen boy whip his finger at the old man he was talking to."That man is a firebender!"
The occupants of the shop shared a collective gasp.
"Shit! Gotta do something!" Cooler said before immediately taking control of Zuko's body."Oh no, Uncle! Stay away from that firebender in the blue outfit!" he swung his finger dramatically at the Saiyan, whom everyone gasped at.
Vegeta's eyebrows almost flew off of his forehead."What!?"
"What?" echoed Jet."I'm not-"
"Look out before he melts your head off!" ZuCKooler persisted.
"No I'm not!" Vegeta yelled.
"Somebody do something before he does to my poor Uncle Mooshy what he did to my face!" he said, pointing at his scar, making everyone gasp yet again.
"I've never seen you in my entire life!" Vegeta growled."Shut the hell up before I incinerate-dammit, I walk right into that..."
"He IS a firebender!" shouted a guard, rising from his seat."Arrest him!"
"The hell you will!" Vegeta hopped from his seat. But of course, this left his back open to Iroh, who subtly used a lightning infused karate chop to strike Vegeta in the back of the neck, knocking him out with none the wiser.
The drooling Saiyan finally snapped to his senses, though he was not in the same place as before. He found himself in a dark stone room, suspended off the ground by diamond restraints around his wrist and ankles. He tried moving, but he could not feel his own body, having evidently been paralyzed. But none of that was his main concern, as he slowly lowered his chin...to see his body was stripped down to his black underwear.
The entire facility beneath Lake Lao Gai rattled with a deafening."NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"