Just so you know, the Tales of Ba Sing Se episode doesn't exist in this story. Let's just say Trunks accidentally wiped that day from history during one of his time patrols.

The next morning, the Z Warriors and Saiyans had assembled at Capsule Corp as planned. As the fighters readied their minds for the coming adventure, they informed Dr. Briefs of the situation.

"I see," Dr. Breifs nodded, sitting on his recliner with a smoking pipe in hand,"So you need me to build a new spaceship for you to get to this 'Planet Avatar'?"

"If it's not too much for you, doctor," Krillin said, raising his palms,"We can't risk Goku using his Instant Transmission to get us there, 'cause it probably would end up being a one way trip. We don't quite know when Cell will escape the planet. You gotta make us a ship as fast as possible."

The old man leaned back, staring at the ceiling in contemplation."I suppose I could; but it took me at least a month to build that first ship, and that one was incorporated with parts from Goku's spacepod. It'd be a rather tall order to design a second one by myself, from scratch no less; but I suppose, perhaps if, well...she could help..." he looked away, suddenly gaining a less confident demeanor.

The human Z Warriors collectively gulped at the pronoun.

"She?" Raditz asked."This 'she' isn't the same 'she' I had the displeasure of meeting last night, is it?"

The night beforehand went on uneventfully, save for Chi Chi's introduction of Goku and his relatives, particularly Goku's brother, whom Chi Chi unexpectedly assaulted with her trusty frying pan in order to defend her newborn second child, whom Goku was a whole new flavor of elated to find out he now had. Raditz still had slight bruises.

"Was that thing made of katchin or something!?" he complained tenderly feeling his cheeks and forehead."Thank the Kais my mother never possessed such a torture device, or else I never would have lived to meet Kakarot!"

Bardock chuckled, his arms crossed."Yep, Gine was a sweet girl, but she had her own dark side..."

Krillin sighed, bending over."No, Not Chi Chi, he's talking about..." too scared to utter the name even with his inside voice, he whispered it into Radtiz's ear.

"How the hell could a pair of bloomers help us!?" Raditz blurted on confusion.

Piccolo groaned."for god's sake-He's talking about Bulma!"

Goku, Raditz, Bardock, and Piccolo watched as the rest of the males in the room yelped and dove under the coffee table.

"Damn you, Piccolo!" Krillin whaled,"You have spoken the name of that which should never be named!"

"What's the deal with you guys?" Goku raised a brow."I'm sure Bulma would be willing to help; sure, she makes me nervous too sometimes, but-"

"But YOU weren't there when it happened!" Yamcha cried.

"It?" Bardock said."What's with the damn pronouns?"

"Will you just act like adults for once and tell him straight already!?" demanded Piccolo.

The men and boy half heartedly crawled out from their shelter. Krillin took a deep breath."Listen, Goku, Vegeta left Earth for a reason: a month ago, he and..." he took another deep breath "...Bulma...had a terrible argument about how to raise Trunks...Vegeta was fed up with it, and, well," Krillin shrugged," he just left."

"Why would they argue about something like that?" Raditz asked."All you have to do is stick your legs into them and pull them up to your waist. Do Earth pants not work that way?"

The Z Warriors besides Goku and Piccolo fell to the floor anime style.

"Damn, guess that disease has spread to this planet as well..." noted Bardock.

"Ohhhh, I see..." Goku scratched his hair."So I guess Bulma must still be pretty upset, and doesn't want anyone to talk to her?"

"That's an understatement!" cried Tien."She's gone insane! She bought an entire island to live on alone with Trunks, reprogrammed Android 17 to be Trunk's new father, and surrounded that island with a fleet of killer robots!"

"Which, as it happens, have been programmed to attack us in particular if we get too close!" Yamcha added.

"Why would a pair of clothing need a father?" Raditz quietly asked Bardock.

"Humans're friggin weird..." Bardock shook his head.

"And as if that wasn't enough, she even made an AVF around the island in case Vegeta comes back!" Gohan added.

"A what?" Goku asked.

"AVF," Gohan repeated,"Anti-Vegeta-Field."

Raditz gawked."Are saying this woman created a force-field designed to repel Vegeta and only Vegeta?"

"I know!" Dr. Breifs nodded."I've never been more proud of my daughter!"

"okay..." Bardock squinted one eye."Well, if you need help building a ship, doctor, I'm your next best chance."

"Really now?" questioned Dr. Briefs."Do you mean to say that you, too, are a brilliant scientist?"

"oh, this shit again..." Raditz grumbled.

The Saiyan confidently rested his fists on his hips."I'll have you know I graduated in Saiyan University with a major in BADASS!" he sounded, tightening his fist."That wasn't a joke; it was a real academic field on my planet, and it happened to involve repairing spaceships." he elaborated, his fist still clenched.

"...Suppose I'll have to take your word on it..." Briefs shrugged. He clapped his hands."Welp, let's get to work!"

Meanwhile, in a Fire Nation encampment...

"Listen up, men!" Mai trumpeted, her arms folded behind her, pacing along the rows of Fire Nation soldiers."Today is the day that you embark on the most ambitious enterprise of your pathetic lives! In the past, you have tried and failed to breach the walls of the Impenetrable City by way of direct force; so then, since it is painfully clear that you peons cannot just fly over it - much as I'd like the time the teach you to fly - you will instead go under it! Our comrade, Perfect Cell, shall bore a tunnel deep beneath the outer and inner walls, through which you will travel all the way to the city without rest or complaint! You will then surface from beneath the capitol palace and launch an overwhelming surprise attack! With the Avatar and Prince Vegeta swiftly dealt with by Cell, your Princess, the Giny-ahem-Ty Lee, and yours truly, we will conquer the city in the name of the Fire Force! Are you punks ready to make history!?"

"YES, CAPTAIN MAI!" the soldiers saluted.

"But before all of that," Captain Mai said,"It is key that we work on your special fighting poses! This mission will surely fail without them!" she said, spinning around, and bending over so that her now upside down face could be visible.

The soldiers mumbled and looked amongst eachother in confusion before lazily cheering again.

Ten meters away from this crowd stood Ty Lee and Perfect Cell, the android staring at the possessed girl with the biggest smile on his perfect face."Putting Ginyu in her body was unquestionably the greatest idea I've ever had..."

"I never thought I would live to see Mai so perky!" perked Ty Lee.

"That's the captain for you," inwardly smirked Burter,"This is far from his first experience in a little girl's body."

"Yeah!" added Jeice "His charisma stays with him in every form!"

"I'm still surprised Ginyu died in the first place," noted Guldo,"Didn't he switch bodies with a frog or something?"

"I heard 'dat he was taken by that blue haired lady to live in her garden on Planet Earth" explained Recoome "But then 'dis fat guy with a katana fell on'em..."

Thanks to Cell's telepathy, he could hear this conversation. The perfect being was still very much surprised by how easily this gymnast girl had become accustomed to her bizarre situation, let alone Azula's. Not only had she befriended the very entities tugging back and forth for control of her own body, but it was as if Ty Lee herself had simply transitioned to his side, essentially turning her back on her people. Had those Ginyu clowns talked the child into it so easily? Or...is this seemingly incompetent optimist harboring more ill will against her princess than he gave her credit for?

"Well, at least it wasn't that damn Prince of Monkeys that did'em in," thanked Burter,"Right, Lord Freiza?" Burter said out loud, it being his turn to use Ty Lee's body to turn Ty Lee's head. But then Ty Lee's face lost its smile."Um...Lord Freiza...?"

Cell turned to his right as well to see Freiza; but all he saw was Princess Azula, standing there with her arms dangling, her pupils dilated, and her drooling mouth slightly hung open.

"Hm, must be having a serious dispute in there," deduced Cell.

"MAKE! IT! STOOOOOOOP!" Azula shrieked at the top of her metaphysical lungs.

Deep within the recesses of her own psyche, Freiza had created a nigh identical duplicate of his own personal hell, complete with the tree, pretty flowers, and frolicking stuffed animals with their endless playing of happy music; the only difference was that it was Azula who hung from the tree strapped in a bundle of silk, and thrashing about in pure madness.

Freiza himself contentfully lied against the foot of the tree with his eyes closed, gleefully waving his finger in sync with the music."You know what's ironic? This music is actually starting to grow on me. Or perhaps it's simply your terrible scream that's complimenting it..." he noted.

"GET ME OUT OF HERE!" Azula sort of replied."I'LL KILL YOU! I'LL KILL YOU IN THE MOST SLOW, PAINFUL WAY IMAGINABLE, AND I WILL MAKE YOU BEG FOR IT!"

At this Freiza could only laugh and clap his hands."Ohhohoho! You see? Now you know precisely how I felt! Such a terrible fate, isn't it?" he cheered, his eyes still shut. He parted his hands."I will most certainly make this all go away, as soon as you lend me full control over your body without resistance..."

"GO...TO...HELL!"

"Already here!" the emperor beamed. Freiza finally rose off the ground."Really, child, just let go; forsake that pesky will of yours and your suffering will end." he floated up to meet the restrained princess, arms folded behind his back."Listen to me, girl, I can tell that, the hilariously wide margin between our respective powerlevels aside, you and I are cut from the same cloth: you're a natural born prodigy, with all the strength and genius that makes a joke out of everyone else around you. We both know you don't deserve your own body to be robbed from you, to be a prisoner in your own brain; but it's not going to last forever. I'm just using it as a temporary vessel until I find a more suitable one."

"You think I'm stupid!?" Azula fumed."You're just going to use my body until you get me killed, and then you'll move on to the next most convenient host! Who's next, my father!? If you think I'm going to stand back and let you usurp control over my armies and my nation, THEN YOU'VE ALREADY SEALED YOUR FATE-!" suddenly, her lips transformed into a zipper that was zipped tightly shut.

"Swear to Beerus, now you sound just like Vegeta..." Freiza muttered disappointedly,"Well, if you're going to be like that, I have no choice to but to keep you in here for the time being..." he sneered, floating ever so further from infuriated princess."Good day now; if you need me, I'll be outside, usurping control over your armies, your nation, and let's not forget your entire species!" he announced, laughing all the way up into the clouds.

"FREEEEIIZAAAAAAAA!" Azula cried with all her might.

Freiza popped back into the conscious world; the first thing he noticed was a stick prodding Azula's cheek. He turned to see Ty Lee, who withdrew the stick behind her. Freiza wiped the drool off of Azula's face."How long was I out?"

"Ten minutes," Cell answered.

"Ooooh! A new record!" Freiza grinned."Subjugating this body is getting easier by the day! Soon I will have complete control."

"What exactly were you doing in there with her?" Cell wondered.

"Just putting the pathetic human in her pathetic human place," replied Freiza with a satisfactory smile.

"You know you can't keep this up forever, right?" Cell reminded, crossing his arms skeptically."If she keeps resisting your influence, the strain will take its toll from the both of you. At some point, one mind is going to consume the other; otherwise, I'm not sure how long that body will survive."

"Well, we obviously know which mind will remain in the end, do we not?" Freiza shrugged."This body's already mine; I just hope Cooler can follow through with this crazy plan of his so I can finally get back to being my old self."

Freiza seemed well enough confident with his situation, but Cell was not. It didn't seem so concrete that he could completely suppress the soul of a body that didn't belong to him. He seriously hoped Freiza could receive his new body before it was too late.

Three hundred years ago, the Dai Lee was founded by Avatar Kyoshi, an organization of elite earthbending peace keepers tasked with maintaining order and civility within the walls of Ba Sing Se; this was the goal for which Long Feng had striven for most of his life. He knew better than any of his subordinates that his job required the patience, discernment, and strength of mind of a king, going so far as to conspire against the actual king to keep that very order intact. But now, as the aged earthbender methodically stepped through the halls of Lake Laogai, a great part of him wanted to take it all back, if only so that he would never have to hear the unrelenting howl of his latest prisoner.

Long Feng stopped before the metal door, guarded by a pair of his agents."Has he honestly kept this up the entire time?" he asked.

"If your are asking me something," one guard said,"I should let you know that I am totally deaf because of this man."

Long Feng exhaled. With the greatest poise of courage, he opened the door to reveal the endlessly yelling and madly thrashing Saiyan in his captivity - Long Feng's earplugs seemed useless.

"Would you like some water?" asked Long Feng, unable to hear his own voice,"I'm certain you're parched by now..."

"THE ONLY THING THAT WILL QUENCH MY THIRST WILL BE THE RIGHTFUL RETURN OF MY SAIYAN ATTIRE! OTHERWISE I WILL TAKE ALL OF YOUR HEADS AND SYSTEMATICALLY SHOVE THEM UP ALL YOUR ASSES EACH ACCORDING TO RANK!" replied Vegeta."SO I HOPE FOR YOUR SAKE YOU HAVE MY CLOTHES ON YOU RIGHT THIS MOMENT OR ELSE-!"

"You mean these?" Long Feng immediately raised Vegeta's suit for him to see.

"I-!" Vegeta paused."...Holy shit, that was easier than before..." he noted. But then he grew skeptical."What's the catch?"

"Besides preventing this facility from caving in, the only catch is for you and your brother to vacate this city, this kingdom," his eyes narrowed,"and this planet."

Vegeta reeled in surprise."You know!?"

"Ba Sing Se is the second oldest city on earth; the Dai Li control the flow of all history within these walls. You are the spitting image of the Saiyan king that nearly wiped out my race over a thousand years ago," Long Feng explained."That, and your inhuman lung capacity tipped me off as well."

"You know what I am, and yet you're willing to set me free?" Vegeta broached.

"Because I know what destruction your people can cause, even with the seal intact."

"Seal!?" Vegeta repeated."So you know what causes Saiyans to grow weaker here?"

"I know there is a seal," Long Feng said."What it is and where it is has been lost to time. Regardless, I need you leave."

"Don't you think I would have if I could!?" Vegeta barked."Whatever 'seal' you're referring to rendered my ship useless! I've been stuck on your stupid world for a month!"

"And yet, the previous Saiyan known as Vegeta escaped?" Long Feng reminded.

"I still don't even know how he did that!" Vegeta yelled.

"Well," Long Feng began,"I believe I do" he raised his other hand, and clenched it.

Vegeta's restraints crumbled, the Saiyan falling to the ground. He stood fully erect and dusted himself off in confusion.

"Believe it or not, you're not the only alien to land here recently." Long Feng held the suit closer. "Your clothes, your highness?"

"Just how much do you know about the Saiyans?" Vegeta asked, as he followed Long Feng down the stone carved hall.

"I know enough," he said."The other Vegeta and his army fell to the earth like meteors, and raised the old Earth Kingdom to ruin; and Avatar Yangchen miraculously stopped them...also, something about giant monkeys and plant dwarves..."

"We can turn into giant monkeys," Vegeta explained.

Silence...

"Don't judge me!" Vegeta snipped."Anyway, you mentioned another alien landing here."

"Ah, him," Long Feng recalled."You needn't worry; he's no Saiyan. The point is, he has something you definitely want..."

With cinematic timing, they stopped before another door. Long Feng opened it as well, and when he did, Vegeta's face nearly exploded.

"Mother of Mai..."

And once again, by the skin of their teeth, the journey to meet the Earth King turned out to be a shocking success, thanks to the startling revelation that the upper class of Ba Sing Se worship Saiyans, the ironic bane of their very beings. While Tarble was out somewhere learning more about the religion he was unexpectedly part of, the Gaang was in the royal war room, gathered around a huge stone atlas of their known world, accompanied by the Earth King's military council.

"General Fong's base will serve as the launching point of the attack. " said General How," In exactly two months, the Army and Navy will invade the Fire Nation on The Day of Black Sun."

A hopeful smile spread across Aang's face."Guys...I can't believe we're actually gonna do this...We're gonna save the world!"

"Don't cheer before the finish line, Aang," Sokka said,"Two months is a long time; with Cell and Ghost Freiza out there, anything could happen between now and the Eclipse." he said, inwardly screaming with joy that the general's were using his name for the eclipse.

"There might be another issue," stated General How, brandishing the scroll containing the plan,"In order for us to execute the plan, we're going to need the Earth King's seal for this scroll..."

Sokka groaned like a the revving of a lawn mower."I just don't get it! Why is talking to the Earth King about the war such a problem!?"

"I am not at liberty to divulge that information..." How simply said.

"WHY!?" demanded the irate teen.

"Don't tell me," Toph guessed,"Because Long Feng said so?"

The general looked away sheepishly."...I am not at liberty to say 'yes'..."

"Why is that guy so obsessed with keeping us away from the Earth King?" Katara wondered in irritation.

"I am not at liberty to-"

"I KNOW!" Sokka cut the general off.

Toph huffed, folding her hands behind her head."Guys, I think it's pretty obvious: the king's not really in charge; Long Feng's using him as a figure head to run the city behind the scenes. Are you not at liberty to confirm this, general?" she cocked her head in the man's direction.

General How screamed internally...

"Case closed..." Toph raised her palms.

"You know," Sokka leered," we could just tell Tarble about this little monopoly of his - you know, the emissary of your king's goddess? Pretty sure that would negate any authority Long Feng has over you," he crossed him arms,"Or we could take it a step further and go get Vegeta..."

The generals gasped.

"King Vegeta has returned!?"

"Nope," Katara shook her head,"his son, and Tarble's older, stronger, and way sexier brother. I'd like to see Long Feng get in his way..."

At the mention of that name, Aang's whole body shivered. He had not forgotten that rant the Saiyan had given him before he left, about wanting to destroy him from the moment they met. Sure, Vegeta had made passing comments about that to him in the past, but that time, it had felt quite honest. Aang always wanted to see or find the good in people, and make friends with everyone he met; but the Avatar in him was beginning to put his faith in the Saiyan in question - could he really still trust him?

"Listen to me, there is only so much I can do!" General How protested."I may be a general, but the Dai Li are the Earth King's personal agents; if you want him to sign this scroll, you'll need to get passed them." he admitted, feeling eyes in the walls staring at him for giving even that little information.

Toph shrugged."M'kay, Vegeta it is then; I'll bet he's back at the house; hey Twinkle Toes, go get Appa, it's gonna be a pain to get there on foot." she said as she walked away.

At this, the airbender had an epiphany."...Um, actually, Toph, I have no idea where Appa is..."

Toph froze in place."Nani?"

Katara felt her chin."Actually...I haven't seen Appa since we first got to Ba Sing Se, I think he was being led from the train by some people that looked like the...Dai Li..." her eyes widened.

The Gaang swung accusing eyes towards General How...

The general's eyes shifted among the group."...I am...most certainly at liberty to leave this room." he said, before running away like a ninny.

Not long ago, Lake Laogai quaked with the roar of its latest prisoner; but now it echoed with laughter, and from the very same prisoner no less.

"I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!" Vegeta thundered, not out of the typical fit of rage, but of unfettered joy as he beheld the alien vessel."It's a spaceship; a goddamn spaceship on this pre-automobile age planet!" he marveled, he scowl vanished, hugging the small craft.

Granted, the white, sprinter van shaped vehicle with two huge engines on either side wasn't a very big one; seemed like a few individuals could barely fit in it, and it didn't look like any kind of ship he was used to, but it was in fact a fully intact, undamaged spaceship; the Saiyan was beyond certain of that, giving him more than enough justification to smear his happy face across the wind shield.

"Yes..." Long Feng maintained his poise amidst his snickering agents."I can assume from your impending orgasm that this alien craft will be sufficient for you and your other Saiyan friend to leave the planet?"

"You're damn right it does!" Vegeta cried, peeling his face from the ship."Look at it! It has everything needed to escape this wretched planet...!" he hopped to the ground, and fell to his hand and knees to peek beneath the ship."It has a main floater underneath, meaning it's meant for interstellar travel, but here's the best part..!" he zipped to the left side of the ship, directing his fingers at the engine."These are hydro-rocket pods! This two lovely bitches can convert water - F*&ING WATER!- into enough fuel to breach the atmosphere! It's PERFECT! And it's all mine for the taking! HOW'D YOU EVEN FIND THIS BABY!?" he shouted, then resumed hugging the ship, outright French kissing it.

"As I said, the previous alien arrived in it..." Long explained vaguely."So I take it you'll be leaving immediately?"

"You bet your fascist ass I am!" answered Vegeta."I'm going to grab Tarble, throw him into this thing, blast off into the stars, and FINALLY BE REUNITED WITH MY ONE TRUE LOVE!" yelled Vegeta to the heavens...but then he paused."...forget that last part...Where is Tarble right now?"

"Yes...the other one," Long Feng looked away, having the unsettling notion that this Saiyan would end him on the spot upon knowing what grand luxuries the other one was experiencing while this one was lock away in prison."Why don't you prepare your spacecraft to depart, while I have a Joo Dee bring this 'Tarble' to you?"

Vegeta raised an eyebrow."A Joo Dee?"

"I, em..." Long Feng cleared his throat,"I just have lots of female servants that happen to be named 'Joo Dee'..." he covered himself, hoping this being could not detect lies.

"Didn't we just agree that I should leave as soon as possible?" Vegeta reminded."I'm not waiting for anymore delays - today, Vegeta is free!" he announced, as he powered up, and blasted off upwards through the ceiling.

"Aaaand, now's there's a hole..." Long Feng lamented, staring blankly at the damaged ceiling."Someone close that before the whole chamber floods in..." he ordered his men. Although, despite the abrupt exit, he felt much better knowing that the Saiyans will soon be gone; and once they are, the Avatar and his little friend will have absolutely no leverage to speak with the Earth King; he smirked, as he likely won't even have to help them with their invasion plan. Ba Sing Se was a place of order, and he will restore it.

In one of the palace's bathroom's, a Dai Li Agent was frozen up to his neck in ice, staring back up at the angry children."I am not at liberty to divulge that information..."

"That shit don't fly with us, son!" Toph barked."Where is our flying bison!?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about," replied the agent,"What is a flying bison?"

"Toph knows you're lying, genius!" Sokka said."You're wasting you're time trying to mislead us!"

"It's you who are wasting your time," the agent protested,"I have never heard of this Appa of which you speak."

"WE NEVER TOLD YOU HIS NAME!" Katara pointed out.

The Dai Li agent blinked...

"...I am not at liberty-"

"TELL ME WHERE APPA IS OR I WILL ASSIMILATE YOUR SOUL!" boomed the collective voice of the glowing Avatar, the blinding light radiating from his white eyes and tattoo casting a shadow behind the agent.

Thankfully, the earthshaking roar concealed the robe-soiling fart expelled from the Dai Li agent's bowels."Well, if you're going to be like that, your bison is in our secret headquarters beneath an island in the middle of Lake Laogai."

In the next beat, Aang turned back to normal."Now, see? Was that so difficult to say?" he beamed, before delivering a karate chop to the man's neck, knocking him out instantly. The airbender happily turned around and walked out of the room.

The Water Tribe siblings stared at each other.

"I see he's taking points from Vegeta now..." noted Sokka.

"As he bleepin' should!" Toph barked, arms crossed."Long Feng has gone too dang far this time! Once we find Appa, I'm gonna bury that dude, get the king to sign that stupid scroll, and finally get the hell out of this crazy place: worst. city, ever!" she concluded.

"We still have to find Vegeta, though..." reminded Katara.

Sokka shrugged."I wouldn't sweat about that; the Prince of Angry always finds his way back to us," he smirked ",whether he likes it or not..."

For as long as Tarble had lived though the universe, he had seldom heard positive opinions toward his people. Whether they were feared by defenseless planets for their power and ferocity, or frowned upon by superior races for their comparitive weakness and brutishness, it was never anything nice. So when the Saiyan prince fell to this rock with his insecurities and persecution complex, you could bet a planet he was surprised to meet a race that not only admired his own race, but revered them as outright gods: guess it payed to keep one's expectations so low...

The Earth King Led the small Saiyan through the most ornate of temples, walking along golden tiles lined with jewels, passing golden pillars lined with jewels and various sketches of what looked like a Saiyans carved into them, in between the pillars were hung tapestries woven out of gold and lined with jewels, behind those were stained glass windows made out of gold and lined with jewels (please do not ask how a transparent window could be made out of an opaque metal, I'm still racking my brain about that). At the end of the sanctuary was an enormous statue of their goddess in all her glory - guess what material was used to construct it...

"Here she is," introduced the Earth King, his reverent arms spread wide."The one who rescues our world from the otherworldly evils of the past: as it has always been, as it is!"

It took Tarble a moment to scan the statue for himself, as he was still pondering how a temple composed almost entirely out solid gold had yet to collapse under it own weight. But when he did see it, he found it quite marvelous. It was a young woman, as expected, dressed in kimono armor similar to that which Sokka's lover wore (as well as his father's lover, but he should have seen that coming...); her arms were spread wide as if to embrace the planet. Her facial features were scarcely different from any Earth Kingdom woman he'd seen so far, save for the eyes, which if accurate to the person, would have been a tad small for a female Saiyan (so, they were not quite as freakishly huge as his own). What was totally expected was the hair - though there was thankfully no extreme widow's peak, it was essentially the same flame shape his father's or brother's. The only thing about the design that felt truly off to Tarble was the odd lack of a resting angry glare, indicative of any Saiyan; in fact, she appeared to be very happy.

"I know this is very likely a dumb question, Your Highness," Tarble had to ask,"but does everything have to be made out of gold and lined with jewels?"

"Please, call be Kuei," the Earth King bowed respectfully,"Of course it must be: the material is represent the color of her hair, and the jewels refer to her magnificent aura..." he breathed, eyes closed.

That gave sufficient pause for Tarble."Hold on. You're saying her hair was yellow?"

"No no no, Great One," Kuei shook his head,"I'm saying it was golden!" he exclaimed,"The very earth she stepped on transformed into diamonds of all colors, and surrounded her body with an aura like a rainbow. When her mortal body passed away, her chi spread all over the earth, becoming one with all of the world's gold."

"And jewelry?" Tarble guessed.

"You catch on!" the king nodded rapidly."And through the most precious earthen materials, Vetega is always with us." he put his hands together sacredly.

"Golden hair? but that would mean she was..." The more Tarble stared up at this mere idol of an alien, the more a certain feeling of warmth grew in his alien heart. At first, he was willing to write this whole religion off as the typical result of an encounter with an otherwordly species, with this "Vetega" being a representation of said superior race. But as he recalled depictions of Avatar Kyoshi and her similar armor, recalled the talking owl's account of his father's imprisonment, and looked at that unmistakable golden flame shaped hair over that relatively human face, the more obvious it became that Vetega was a real person. And not just any person: a Saiyan, brought into the universe by the union of the king of all Saiyans and the Avatar of all...humans...That didn't have quite the same ring to it, but the point was that had she truly existed, not only did that mean that Tarble had a sister, but that sister was a Super Saiyan, the first Super Saiyan.

"I can't believe it..." Tarble gazed with wonder."...This woman, my sister, was the Legendary Super-!"

The ceiling exploded as Vegeta plowed down into the room, rocking the entire temple and scaring the occupants shitless."TARBLE! OUTSIDE! NOW!"

Tarble was too blindsided for ineligible speech."durwuweh-What!?" he tried as his brother seizes him by his collar

"NO 'WHATS'! COME WITH ME!" shouted the prince with as little context as possible, before blasting upward, blasting another hole in the ceiling as he dragged the other Saiyan up with him.

The room was left with a deafening silence in Vegeta's wake...

The Earth king blinked."...THE KING OF THE SAIYANS HAS RETURNED!"

The turbulence rippled through Tarble's cheeks. Vegeta abruptly stopped at roughly a mile into the sky, giving the brother a chance to push away from the taller Saiyan."What the hell's gotten into you!?"

"You're not going to believe what I just found in Lake Laogai!" Vegeta began.

"Where?"

"It's where I've been this entire time, just listen!" Vegeta said, gripping Tarble's shoulders."I found a spaceship!"

Tarble's eyes bugged out."Excuse me!?"

"You heard me right, Vegeta Jr.!" Vegeta affirmed."There's a goddamn spaceship right here in Ba Sing Se! Enough for a handful of people!"

"But how!?" Tarble exclaimed.

"Apparently, there was some other alien that crash landed here years ago, and his ship is completely intact! The city's government has been keeping it hidden underground in Lake Laogai to this day! We've finally found our ticket off this stupid planet, come on!" he announced as he clamped his fingers around Tarble's wrist to take off; but suddenly, Tarble yanked his arm away.

"Vegeta, wait!" Tarble hesitated.

"Wait for what!? I just found a damn ship! We're free!" Vegeta insisted.

"That's great news, Vegeta, but..." Tarble paused.

"But?" Vegeta blinked. His eye twitched."No, no 'buts'! I have suffered through one 'but' after another ever since I landed here; I will not be hindered by even a single 'but' further! From this point onward, this is a 'but'-free zone; and I will vaporize every 'but' I come across from here out!"

"I can't go yet!" Tarble cried.

"WHY THE F*%& NOT!?" Vegeta thundered.

Tarble took two deep breaths; he bent over as he scratched his hair."Well, the thing is, Vegeta...I think I've just become the key to ending the war-"

"ooohhhhhmyGOOOOD...!" Vegeta could not have groaned harder.

"You don't get it, Vegeta! I'm the only reason Aang managed to even get close to the Earth King! With his help, they can muster an army to invade the Fire Nation during the eclipse so that the Avatar can finally defea-"

"WHO GIVES A SHIT!?" Vegeta clawed his fingers."We've been stranded on this steampunk rock this whole time; but the moment you hear of a way to escape, you actually OBJECT!?"

"I'm not saying no!" Tarble tried."But I just want to solve this problem first! Then we can go!"

The airtight-lipped Vegeta heaved oxygen in and out through his flaring nostrils in order to prevent himself from screaming his heart out once more."Brother, the problem has solved itself," he managed to reply calmly,"the Avatar is obviously going to win eventually; and Cell and Ghost Frieza will be trapped here forever - two spaceducks, one stone."

"Except that Cell and Ghost Freiza will 'obviously' annihilate the Avatar and his friends without our help!" Tarble persisted.

"Why do you care about those brats so much!?" Vegeta demanded.

"Because I can help!" Tarble defended himself."For once in my life, I've met people that aren't afraid of me because I'm a Saiyan, or spiteful of me because I'm so weak! And now, I actually have the chance to help them, to save them, to save their entire planet from getting destroyed! Are you honestly okay with allowing Freiza to wipe out another race!?"

"Yes I am!" responded Vegeta."Because once he wipes out this race, he'll never be able to wipe out another race again! Because he'll be stuck here with Cell, who will probably kill him at some point, and then he'll be trapped here forever!" Vegeta crossed his arms and turned around."And we get the last laugh! So in the end, all this rubbish about the war and the Avatar is irrelevant; don't think for a second that I've stucked with these kids this whole time because..."

"Because you cared about them?" Tarble finished.

"Exactly!"

"You're lying..."

At this, Vegeta frowned in confusion."I'm what?"

"You do care!" Tarble shouted pointing straight down."Don't deny it! I saw you back at that lake, freaking the hell out when you thought for just the slightest moment that Sokka was dead, just like his damn sister! You should've seen yourself lying there with Aang and his friends; what am I saying, you ARE one of his friends!"

Vegeta laughed at this."Is that what you think!? I'm just gaining their trust, waiting for my moment to strike!" he smirked, clenching his fist menacingly.

"Really?" Tarble deadpanned."You mean to say that you have intentionally put yourself through all of this misfortune and humiliation - even after gaining some of your power back - as part of some elaborate, evil scheme? That's a bit off-character for you, Vegeta." his crossed his arms prudently."The Vegeta I know would have simply freed Aang from his mortal coil the moment you could fly, but you haven't. In fact, you've been off character ever since I found you here; six years ago, you were chilling with Nappa, eating bug people, now you're going out of your way to protect the lives of random kids - there are Galactic Patrolmen that would have put up with less..."

"Well six years is a long time, alright!?" Vegeta barked, briefly turning his head to Tarble.

"Right..." Tarble noted."Can we perhaps talk about those six years?"

"No we most certainly cannot!"

"Well I can..." continued Tarble,"You spent the first year just trying to get to some distant planet never documented by either the Galactic Patrol or Frieza Force ;not even a month later you show up at the nearest Frieza Force station, with nothing more to say other than Nappa is dead, and immediately follow Frieza to Planet Namek for reasons I never found out; a week later, Planet Namek...explodes...just, just explodes, with presumably you and Frieza on it, I start freaking out: Did Vegeta die? Did Vegeta blow up Namek in an attempt to kill Frieza? Then rumors start circulating during the following year about sightings of you training on various remote planets, and Frieza still being alive and planning on invading that aforementioned unidentified planet; then I get a definite confirmation that Frieza is dead, but not a thing about you. Three years later, the Galactic Patrol reports some hella crazy powerlevel readings emitting from that mysterious planet which I have now mentioned for the third time, one of which I only find out a year later was yours. So I do some digging myself, gather my old Frieza Force gear, detect your energy signature somewhere in the East Galaxy, and WHOOPITIDOO! Six years later, Here we are!" the Saiyan finishes, his limbs extended in all directions.

"Good for you, little brother, you found me - 'Reunited, and it feels so good'," Vegeta joked," except I feel like a piece of shit."

"I hope you do!" Tarble pointed his shaking finger at the taller Saiyan."I've been officially labeled by the Galactic Patrol as the last living Saiyan in the universe! And before I got here, I actually believed them! But you know what? That's not even my point, Vegeta..."

"Like you ever make it to your point..." Vegeta continued not to look at the shorter Saiyan.

"My point is, I finally know what's been going on with you all these years, and what that unnamed planet has to do with it..."

"It's called Earth, and it is in fact documented," nitpicked Vegeta.

"...Because on that planet, YOU STARTED A GODDAMN FAMILY!" Tarble howled, lurching forward."That's why you've changed so much! Somewhere out there, you have a lover and a child, and no doubt some friends you made over the years, all wondering where you are right now! I'll even bet that's where Kakarot lives! Does he have his own family too, Vegeta?" Tarble leered.

"He doesn't have anything, he's dead," Vegeta quickly reminded.

"And just how did he die?" Tarble asked."Did Perfect Cell really kill him? Is that why you left this 'Earth'?"

"It was more like an assisted suicide, really," Vegeta said.

"Or maybe It wasn't Kakarot's death that made you leave..." Tarble shrugged.

"Shut up," Vegeta muttered.

"Maybe it was because Cell killed your family-"

Vegeta spun around in a blaze of fury."BULMA AND TRUNKS ARE FINE! BABY TRUNKS IS LIVING SAFELY AT CAPSULE CORP, AND GROWN-UP TRUNKS WAS RESURRECTED WITH THE DRAGON BALLS AND RETURNED TO THE FUTURE TO DESTROY THE ANDROIDS!"

Once again, Tarble was silenced by the latest flow of improperly relayed information."...I didn't undestan-who cares, the point is you have friends and family on Earth that you care about, and Aang and his friends remind you of them, which is why you care about them as well."

"I do not!" spat Vegeta immaturely.

"You care about them just like you care about me," Vegeta's brother said," and that's why I know you won't leave this planet until Cell is dead, Frieza is extra-dead, the war is over, and that they're safe. Tell me I'm wrong..." glared Tarble.

Again, Vegeta spun around and looked away; but this time, he found his eyes dipping down, over the planet itself - the naive, helpless, doomed planet. These people didn't stand a Yamcha of a chance against Cell, let alone Ghost Frieza, and he knew it. But that wasn't going to stop Aang; he, Sokka, Katara, and Toph, were far more noble than their stupid children personas would have him think. Even after all they've seen, they were still willing to keep fighting, even if they and their annoying race all died, with nobody in the universe to remember them. That was no way to die; the thought of it made the prideful warrior scowl.

But what made him scowl even harder was the realization that his stupid brother was right. All he's been doing since he crashed here was compare this planet to the one he left, abandoned even, only that one had powerful fighters to protect it. Yes, this race was definitely going to die, all of them, every last one; as soon as Vegeta was gone, Cell would kill them all, flying over every village, town, and country, and annihilating them one by one, likely forcing Aang to watch as his people were snuffed out, until he was the last human left and begged for death, to which Cell would respond by handing the boy a 12 gauge shotgun, and Aang would tearfully stick it into his mouth, his last thought to look back on his failure and worthlessness as a sentient being before pumping the barrel and pulling the trigger-

"ALRIGHT, GODDAMMIT, I'LL HELP THEM!" exploded Vegeta.

Tarble crossed his arms and smiled."I knew you had changed, Oni-san..."

"Don't you push it!" Vegeta barked with a threatening pointed finger."We'll put a pin in destroying Cell for now. First things first, we have to put an end to the war."

"Great!" beamed Tarble."I was basically in the middle of that. The Earth King's generals're already refining the invasion plan during the eclipse-"

"That'll take too long, I say we do it," Vegeta cut him off.

Tarble raised a brow."Huh?"

"You and I," Vegeta point to his brother and himself,"Let's fly to the Fire Nation ourselves, crush their armada, beat the Fire Lord within an inch of his life, and force him to surrender; and if he doesn't, we annihilate him."

Tarble had his finger raised, but he wasn't sure what to ask first."You mean...wait, just the two us going...?"

"Yes, just us," Vegeta nodded,"We're more than enough; honestly, you're more than enough by yourself, but you asked for my help, and so I'm going. Come on now, Tarble, we're losing daylight." he said, gesturing to follow him.

"I-wait a mi-You want to go right now?" Tarble questioned.

"Of course we go now," Vegeta replied."There's literally nothing stopping us; we'll be back before anyone notices we're gone." he said, before getting ready to take off westward.

"Vegeta, stop!" Tarble waved his hands quickly.

Vegeta was frozen in a floating squat position."What now!? Are you objecting to ending the war!?"

"You don't get it, Vegeta," Tarble pleaded,"Us going off and killing the Fire Lord ourselves won't bring peace to this planet."

"I have been listening to these children bitch for eternity about how defeating the Fire Lord - the entire point of their quest - will restore balance to the world," Vegeta reminded, irately crossing his arms,"What about that has changed?"

"I didn't say he should not be killed," corrected Tarble,"I mean he shouldn't be killed by us," he padded his chest plate,"We're not from this world - we're an invasive species, a third party that doesn't represent the people that the Fire Nation is warring against. If we kill the Fire Lord, the Fire Nation won't surrender to their enemies, they'll be surrendering to the Saiyans."

"You make that sound like a bad thing," Vegeta noted in annoyance.

"It's bad for this planet!" Tarble tried again."Even if we coerce the Fire Nation into surrendering to the Earth Kingdom, it'll only because we'll be forcing them to do it!" he explained, "And once we leave this planet, we will have removed the Fire Nation's only incentive not to resume their war, thus enabling them to resume their war. The only way to ensure that this world remains at peace is if the Avata-"

The taller Saiyan flung his hands up."Yes, yes, YES, I remember, 'Only the Avatar, master of all four elements...' " he quoted in a mock tone; he rubbed his sinus."How many goddamn times am I going to listen that waterbender's monologue? It's like she sits somewhere, reciting it to herself in the mirror over and over..."

"Aang is the most powerful native of his planet, and doesn't rely on any superficial authority to justify his actions," Tarble elaborated,"He is the most logical candidate to kill the Fire Lord, which he ought to do with his own power."

Vegeta stared at his brother placidly."You know, Tarble, you say 'logical', but I can't help but feel that at some point into this little journey of ours, you gone and fallen for this 'chosen one' bullshit all these Space-Chinamen keep selling to us." his brows flared." Do you seriously expect me to stay here until-when's that eclipse coming?"

"August-ish," Tarble estimated.

"...until August just to leave!? I change my mind! I'm skipping to the part where I destroy Cell and Ghost Frieza! With them dead, there will be nothing worry about, and we'll be free to get out of here."

At this, Tarble shrugged while making a face."mmmmalright, I suppose we could settle for that," he agreed but not really, looking away without expression,"As long as you're okay with all those innocent children going off into a battle from which they may never return..."

This in turn insighted a mental image within Vegeta's mind, of the Avatar having defeated the Fire Lord, but at the cost of his friends' lives as their smoldering corpses lie among him, wishing to the gods that it should have been him that took their place, spending the rest of his young life hating himself for not being able to save his beloved Katara, steadily growing mad from the voices of his deceased friends in his head cursing him for not be there for them, inevitably cutting said young life short by pumping a 12 gauge shotgun and sticking into his mouth-

"THEY HAVEN'T EVEN INVENTED THOSE YET!" he shouted rather randomly. The prince ran all ten fingers through his hair whilst breathing audibly."Listen, Tarble, there has to be another way!" he persisted, almost begging.

"If you can think of an alternative way of having all nations of the world come together to broker peace for the first time in a hundred years without predicating it all on the temporary presence of extraterrestrial life, I'm all ears..." Tarble insisted.

Instead of a sudden vision of the airbender child committing suicide, Vegeta's mind was imbued with a thought that was actually useful, causing himself to let go of his spiky hair and stare out into the horizon blankly...he smiled."That's it!"

"What is?" Tarble wondered.

Vegeta rested his knuckled in his hips."You remember when I said the problem will solve itself? It just did..." he leered."Why don't you come with me to that secret lake base? We're going to need that spaceship..." he said, turning around and taking off.

"Vege-!" Tarble raised his hand, but let it drop. He sighed, and flew over the great city after him.

"Well, that was embarrassing..." thought a familiar Dai Li agent, adjusting his new, clean robe as he walked through the street. It wasn't the right size, but at least it didn't smell of his own human waste. Granted, it seemed appropriate to lose all voluntary bladder control upon being faced with the Avatar's godlike visage, but he doubted any of his peers would believe what happened to him, all alone in the little earthbender's room; and even if they did, they still wouldn't let him hear the end of it. Yep, it was better to just go on about his day like nothing ever happened...

...right up until something else happened. It happened so fast that none of the other walking citizens noticed, seizing the man right off his feet and into an alley, and pinning him to a wall by his neck with one hand.

"If you don't want me to rip your head off," ZukCooler began, his red eyes blaring through Zuko's already demonic-looking blue mask,"You'll do as I say..."

The agent's trousers were soaked in diarrhea long before his attacker finished that sentence. He groaned in his suffrage."Whatever you want, I'm sure it's in Lake Laogai!"

"Is Vegeta in Lake Laogai?"

The Dai Li agent nodded, right before his neck was snapped.

ZukCooler dropped the body, and incinerated it with a finger beam. Just then, Zuko snapped back into control."You just said you'd spare his life!" he cried in astonishment.

"I said no such thing," replied Cooler ,"I told him to do as I said if he didn't want me to kill him, without actually promising not to kill him if he did as I said - you must learn to read the fine print, child."

Zuko felt his cranium as he sighed."Swear to Agni, now you sound just like Azula..." he muttered."So now I guess we're heading to Lake Laogai?""

"Of course we are!" Cooler barked."We cannot allow that filthy monkey to live, for both our sakes."

"You know, you keeping saying that this 'saiyan' person is a threat to my world's existence; and yet it isn't him who keeps using my own body to murder everyone I meet..."

"He'll murder your planet if you give him the chance!" Cooler responded."Now quit dawdling and get me to this lake!"

Zuko crossed his arms."Oh, of course I will, as soon as I figure out where that is."

"Well that's simple, we'll just ask the-"

The Fire Nation prince merely had to crane his eyes down a the black smoldering corpse to cut the voice in his head off.

"...I am beginning to understand your point about the murdering..." he admitted.

"...but I believe Aang can save the world," Katara muttered to her reflection in the water.

"Katara, who're you talking two!?" Toph called from a distance.

"du-Nobody!" she covered herself, rushing back to the group.

They were now gathered on the shore of the aforementioned island within Lake Laogai. Given the lack of a flying bison, it was quite the hassle making it there, but they did, losing count of how much coin worth of train rides and cart fare it cost to get them to the lake itself. Then came the tedious argument between the water and earthbenders on which of their respective elements to make a boat out of, with Katara contending that a stone boat would sink easily and an ice boat would give her more control to travel along the lake, and Toph contending that she could just hollow out the stone boat with pockets of air and that an ice boat would give her a cold.

"You know, Sokka, in hindsight, you could have carried us here yourself," Aang realized.

"How many times do I need to address the ambiguity behind my power?" Sokka reminded.

"Whatever, guys," Toph butt in,"there's a tunnel next to the shore, right under the lake," she said. She assumed a cool earthbending stance and made the water part as a secret pathway rose into view, leading to a stone cap that was presumably the entrance, which she also moved aside. They looked down into the dark shaft in hesitation. In the next beat, they were climbing the ladder down the shaft, leading into a dark hallway lit with green lamps.

The group did their best to navigate throughout the maze of tunnels, undetected by the Dai Li patrolling the facility. One room they passed by was full of women dressed exactly like Joo Dee, all lined up in front of agent telling them they were all Joo Dee, with the Joo Dee's repeating everything that he said.

"That at least explains that..." Sokka noted.

"There's gotta be a room big enough for Appa in here," Aang said as he shifted his eyes, right before he and the others were suddenly frozen at the sound of whistling.

"Who's that?" Katara wondered.

"And what tune is that?" Sokka followed.

The group inched closer to the metal door, behind which sounded the melody of Les Toreadors. They flanked the entrance; and on the count of three, Sokka kicked the door open, with him and the others forming their respective kung fu-action poses, only to be shocked by the source of the noise.

"noooo..." Sokka moaned dreadfully.

"YES!" Aang and Katara cried gleefully.

At the center of the chamber they'd entered sat a man, chained to the floor, his melancholy chin resting on his palm. What was about the man that shocked them was his extensively worn and damaged skin tight purple suit and armor, shaggy white hair, and don't get them started on the blue skin."Were you expecting someone else, Monsieur?" the obvious extraterrestrial inquired, tapping his cheek.

"It's another alien dude, isn't it?" Toph asked.

"Of course I am alien to zis planet, fille stupide, are you blind?" the spaceman snarked.

"Who are you, and why are you talking like that?" Sokka asked as the group gathered before him cautiously.

"Ma name iz Salza, capitaine of zee Armored Squadron, resident of Coolair Planet 98 and former right hand to Lord Coolair 'imself," he explained."As to your ozer question, I am a Space-Frenchmen; can you not tell by ma outrageous accent?"

Sokka blinked "Could you maybe repeat...all of that?"

"Ignore him, he's a racist," Katara dismissed."How'd you end up down here, Salza?"

"I ask maself zat very question everyday, child," Salza answered, and sighed."I have been stuck in zis cave for years now, ever since I barely escaped ze last planet I was on wiz ma life. Zat Namek sought 'ee had killed me when 'ee shot me srough za chest, but leettle did 'ee know ma people 'ave two hearts!" he clenched his fist in triumph. "Not much good zat does me now, zough..." he lamented, regressing to his depressed demeanor.

Toph inhaled."Okay, Katara, I must be racist too, cause I got better hearing than all of you, and I hardly understood any of that; I can't even tell if he's lying or not!" she complained.

"So, what you're trying to say," Aang put emphasis on trying,"is that you almost died in a fight and fled to our world? Why here of all places?"

At this, Salza smirked, and shrugged."How about I tell you if you cut zese chains and git me out of 'ere, bald one?" he said, jiggling said restrains.

Sokka grew naturally skeptical."Why should we trust you?"

Katara scoffed."Why shouldn't we? Because he's blue!? You are SO racist!" she barked, pointing her convicting finger at her brother.

"Our people are DEFINED by that color!" Sokka protested, tugging his Water Tribe tunic.

"Don't worry, I have no reason not to trust you," Aang affirmed,"It's not like you could be in league with the Fire Nation..."

"ze Fire Nation..." Salza blinked, then looked away,"riiiight..."

With that, Aang used earthbending to disconnect Salza's chains from the floor. Salza immediately rose to his feet."Merci, boy!" he cried."If I may ask, 'ho are you?"

Aang was quiet for a moment, silently translating that accent."...oh! I'm Avatar Aang."

At the mention of this, Salza froze, almost letting his jaw hang loose."Avatar? Ze Avatar? Maître of all four elements? Ze one who's been missing for ze past century?"

"That's the one," Toph answered, unsure what the hell 'maitre' meant regardless."How'd you know about that?"

Salza chuckled, scratching his ear."Oho, well, zat actually connects to why I fled to zis planet in particular," he said...before pressing his palm against Aang's chest,"to kill you."

A purple laser exploded through the airbender's chest, propelling his limp body past his mortified friends, hitting the stone ground.

"Scratch ZAT one of ze ol' bucket list!" Salza announced victoriously. Before any of the others could retaliate, he dashed right through them, knocking them aside as he scrambled out the entrance. "Liberté, enculés!" Salza's mad cackle echoed throughout the hallway.

Cooler, sitting in his metaphysical control room, looked on, completely transfixed."...Alright, I give up, what in the f^%$ is this thing?"

The enormous white mammal growled furiously at the teen, his giant chained paws rocking the ground with each stomp.

Zuko dropped his dao swords, wide eyes opened behind the mask."I...the...the Ava...The Avatar's bison! But, if the bison is here then, then the Avatar! And my honor! And my Father! And my honor! And restoring my honor! HONOR!" he cried spasmodically.

"Calm down, boy, you're having an honor attack!" Cooler exclaimed."Breath!"

The prince gasped for air, his hands clutching his throbbing chest. When his pulse regulated itself and slowed, he let his hands drop."Sorry..." he swallowed."What I mean is, this is Appa, the Avatar's flying bison."

"Ah," noted the evil voice,"Which implies that the Avatar is in the city. Interesting..." the voice sneered evilly. "Well, while we're traveling along this currently adjacent route, what say you we put this six legged matinee out of its misery?"

"Actually, I was thinking we could kidnap him and use him to bait the Avatar," Zuko suggested.

For a second there, the prince's head was silent...then burst in a fit of wheezing laughter."BWAHAHAHAH! And here I was under the impression you had no sense of humor!"

"I was serious," Zuko replied in a confused tone; this resulted in a second silence.

"...Excuse me? You actually intend to take this bus-sized mammal with us? What, are you going to hide it in your apartment? Should we have Iroh prepare some tea for it?"

"Oh, okay, Cooler, let's just kill him like everything else that moves!" Zuko scowled.

Just then the room echoed with the sound of the door being shut; Zuko spun around."Uncle!?"

"Iroh!?"

"So, the Blue Spirit," Iroh greeted,"I wonder who could be behind that mask..." he stroked his beard facetiously.

"Little does he know, it's Bruce Wayne," muttered Cooler.

"What are you doing here?" Zuko pried off his mask.

"I was about to ask you the same thing," replied his uncle,"So, what do you plan to do now that you have found the Avatar's bison? Keep it locked in our new apartment? Should I go put on a pot of tea for him?"

"Great Beerus, that actually sounded even dumber out there!" cried Cooler in astonishment.

"Shut. Up." hissed Zuko behind metaphysical teeth. "First I have to get it out of here."

"AND THEN WHAT?!" Exploded the friendly old man out of nowhere." You never think these things through! This is exactly what happened when you captured the Avatar at the North Pole! You had him, and then you had no where to go!"

"I would have figured something out!" Zuko defended himself.

"No! If his friends hadn't found you, you would have frozen to death!" Iroh retorted.

"I know my own destiny, Uncle..." Zuko turned away, pain evident in his body.

"Is it your own destiny?" Iroh demanded, "Or is it a destiny someone else has tried to force on you?"

"Leave Father out of this, Uncle! I have to do this!" Zuko repelled him.

At this, the old man crossed his arms."Oh? You thought I was referring to Ozai? I'm sure that's what your new friend thought as well."

Zuko's eyes shot wide open, flickering red for a moment before spinning back to Iroh.

"Nephew, I am becoming weary of you undermining my intelligence," Iroh narrowed his eyes."I knew from the beginning that this chi is not your own. What have you done to yourself, Zuko?" he threw an accusing finger at his nephew."Has your pursuit of the Avatar become so desperate that you would invite a malevolent spirit to take control over your own body as if it were his own?"

"What?" Zuko blinked."T-That's not how it happened! I didn't choose this-!"

"I know you didn't choose it," Iroh said,"As I said before, it was forced upon you, as with everything else in your life. For three years, you've never made a real choice, always acting on behalf of someone else, and look where it has gotten you!"

"It's not what you think, Uncle!" Zuko tried.

"How isn't it!?" Iroh wondered."You're accepting whatever illusion of power that voice in your head has beguiled you with! I know this because I have made the exact same mistake, and it cost me my son!" he cried, pounding his chest.

"Lu Ten is dead? That explains a few things..."

Zuko paused. "Wait, how do you know my cousin?"

"What is the voice saying to you now, Zuko?" Iroh demanded."Is he telling you not to listen to me?"

Zuko's eyes went red."Actually, I was just lamenting the irony."

The voice paralyzed Iroh just as much Zuko.

"You say Zuko should stop doing whatever he's told, and yet you feed him your self-righteous wisdoms relentlessly." ZukCooler shrugged."Honestly, Iroh, what happened to you? You let your figure go to waste, you sit around sipping tea all day, and now your trying to start a restaurant in the middle of the very city you aspired to reduce to ash? Not to mention you've somehow been usurped by your brother and made a fugitive, but I'd be a hypocrite if I held that against you."

The old man's jaw trembled at the voice parallel to Zuko's voice."...l...Lord Cooler?"

In the next blink of the eye, Zuko was right in front of him."I see I have said too much..." Cooler sighed, before placing his hand upon Iroh's terrified head, and electrocuting him, the old man falling to the ground. Cooler looked down in pity. "Don't worry, prince, I'll make it up to you..." he turned around, aiming a Death Beam right at Appa's head. "...by treating you to a barbecue!" He announced, just before Zuko's body fell over, as if someone had tackled Cooler; in fact, someone did...

In the imaginary control room, Cooler hit the metal floor, pinned down by Zuko. "YOU HURT UNCLE!" he roared in Cooler's face.

"So I pacified him!" Cooler deflected."Calm down and get off me!" he exclaimed as he shoved Zuko off of him, sending him flying into the floating throne.

The two rose to his feet, Cooler with cold eyes, and Zuko with burning rage.

"It was all a lie, wasn't it!?" Zuko yelled."You and Cell didn't end up here out of sheer coincidence, and neither was running into me! You've been here before!"

Cooler huffed; he raised his hands submissively."Now, Zuko, you need to calm down..."

"How do you know Uncle!?" Zuko demanded."How does he know you!?"

Cooler hands remained raised."We have a history; one might even say a friendship."

"LIAR!" Zuko roared."I saw his face! He was terrified of you! What did you do to him!?"

"I helped your uncle, same as I'm helping you..."

"The only one I see you helping is yourself!" Zuko shouted, before punching a fireball straight at Cooler, whom frightfully zipped to the right as it hit the wall. This in turn surprised Zuko, at the powerful alien that felt the need to avoid the attack.

"I told you to calm down!" Cooler persisted."Stand down before you do something you'll regret!"

Zuko raised a brow."I'm not sure if I'm the one that's going to regret it..." he noted, standing straight."I'm starting to see why you had to earn my trust; it's the only way you could control me..."

"I'm not trying to control you, dammit, I'm trying to help you!" grunted Cooler.

"You can't do it by force, can you?" asked Zuko honestly."If you try to suppress me, I can still fight back; I can hurt you!" he said, unleashing fire at Cooler's legs, forcing him to hover off the burning ground.

"You'll definitely hurt yourself trying to resist me..." Cooler warned.

"Why!? Because my mind is so weak? Because I'm such an moron!?" Zuko growled and punched another fireball at Cooler, who vanished and reappeared right in front of Zuko, grabbing his punching arm.

"No, moron, because I can hurt you back, harder," he stated, swinging his right fist into Zuko's temple, sending the teen rolling to the back of the room."See this is precisely what I was hoping to avoid: killing you, that is. As for me, I'm a ghost; so only one of us is really throwing their life away right now..."

Zuko spun his body off the ground, swinging an arc of fire at Cooler with his leg; Cooler merely waved the flame aside, and flexed his arm, causing wind to lift Zuko and suck him toward Cooler, who met his face with another fist, knocking Zuko head over heels and landing belly-first on the ground.

"And once again, you let your temper get the better of you, and lash out when most inappropriate," Cooler cock his head."You piss off your father and refuse to duel him like a man, attack his most trusted admiral, refuse to negotiate with your sister, and now you turn on the only friend you've got. A little word of wisdom, Zu Zu..." he began, lividly gripping Zuko's shirt and hauling the dizzy teen up to eye level."Stop...biting..." he socked Zuko in the face,"...the hand..." he slugged Zuko in the gut, "...that feeds you!" he slammed Zuko to the floor."Are you calm yet?"

Zuko never thought an imaginary fist could be so painful. His pathetic form crawled up to its knees."...Actually...now that you mention it..." a dao sword materialized in his right hand, which he used to stab Cooler in his bare foot, causing the alien to whale in a new kind of agony."I'm f^&*ing NETTLED!" Zuko back-flip kicked Cooler's chin with his left and right foot respectively, delivered four lightning fast flaming punches to Cooler's abdomen, and bashed Cooler's face in with the back of his fist, sending his flying into the giant window.

Cooler slid to the floor, and groggily rose to his feet, wiping the blood off his lips.

"You may be in my head, Cooler," Zuko started, producing both swords."But you're also..." he took a fighting stance "...in my head..."

Cooler blinked."Point made..." he roared, and blasted straight for Zuko.

The group rushed through the hall, Katara and Sokka carefully gripping the downed Aang as they tried to retrace their steps.

" 'Let's free the alien' you said! 'Don't be a racist' you said!" Sokka cried furiously.

"You're gonna be okay, Aang! We're almost out!" Katara did her bast to remain calm. "TOPH, WHERE'S THE GODDAMN EXIT!?" it was not working...

"I don't remember, okay!?" Toph cried,"I'm a sonar, not a map!" she said,"Whatever the hell a sonar is!"

"is' okay, katara..." Aang moaned lethargically."I can't even feel the wound anymore; can't feel...anything..."

"NO, AANG! STAY AWAKE!" Sokka shrieked."No pain is bad! Pain is your friend! The kind of friend that's hard to get along with and makes a scene at parties, but will still save your life when it comes to it! Embrace the pain!"

"EMBRACE ZHE PAIN, WEAKLINGS!" sounded the voice of Salza, the halls echoing with explosions.

"And we're headed straight towards the evil Space Frenchmen," Sokka noted, glaring at Toph,"nice going, sonar."

"Be my guest,
Be my guest,
Put my power to zhe test!
Tie a noose around your neck, cherie,
And die like all zhe rest!"

Salza sang as he butchered every Dai Li agent he saw with his Salza Blade. He pulled a pair of metal doors wide open, peering into the room with glee."Zhere you are, beautiful...!"

Within the room was his sprinter van-shaped spaceship; Salza laughed as he paced towards it, his hands spread open like a hug. Behind the Space Frenchman rushed in Sokka, gazing in shock at the vehicle the purple clothed alien was nearing.

"Finally!" Salza cried,"I can kiss zhis stupid planet goodbye! No more pagodas and sticky rice for me! From now on, it's boeuf bourguignon and Gothic architecture all zhe way!"

Aside from the foreign jabber, that was all Sokka needed to hear: this was a spaceship, and this cruel, dangerous alien was about to use it to escape his world; he looked to his right, seeing his sister holding his dying best friend in her arms. He knew what he had to do, and he was dreading every second of it...

"On second zought, maybe I'll return one day wiz an army and zhrow ma own hat into conquering Planet Avatar!" Salza contemplated.

"Hey, stinky!"

Salza spun around to the familiar voice; he saw the human from before, walking straight towards him with fist clenched. At this, Salza was briefly confused, but then smirked as he realized the boy's intentions."Oh? Tu m'approches? Au lieu de fuir, tu viens droit vers moi?" he inquired, clawing his fingers upward.

"Je ne peux pas te battre sans te rapprocher." grunted Sokka, before his body pulsed with a large white aura."And no, I didn't understand a word I just said."

"NANI!?" spouted Salza as he inched back in surprise."You can control your ki!? Zhat's impossible! Even I have trouble wiz that while I'm in zhe void! Just what kind of human are you!?"

"You see, Salza," Sokka began as he assumed a fighting pose,"You're not dealing with the average Water Tribe warrior anymore..."

"I do not like where you are going wiz zhis..." Salza muttered nervously; his face then shifted into anger,"So I will kill you before you get zhere!" he announced before powering up himself, and lunging for Sokka.

*cue JoJo battle music*

Sokka dashed forth as well, and the two exchanged a flurry of strikes; they zipped across the chamber faster than the naked eye, appearing into view only when there fists and shins clashed.

"Yeah, Sokka, you get that weirdo!" Toph cheered as she pumped her fists.

The two clashed one more time and dashed away from eachother.

"You may have zhe might to hold your own, but you are not faster zhan me, fool, I am like a silver chariot!" Salza touted, creating another Salza blase and assuming a fencing pose.

Sokka drew his boomerang."I have more than enough strength to beat you! You're the fool here!"

"For an inexperienced child such as yourself to stand in ma way is to put yourself in zhe position of the hanged man! You will face ma judgement zhis day; and in zhe name of ma departed emperor, I shall subjugate ZA WARUDO!"

"The what now?" Sokka raised a brow.

"HAVE AT ZHEE!" Salza roared, charging Sokka; their blades clashed.

Cooler blocked, Zuko's sword swings with his wrist armor."I'M ON YOUR SIDE, YOU RETARD!" he ensnared Zuko's right wrist with his tail, swung him into the ground. Zuko grabbed Cooler's tail and yanked him off his feet, slamming him into the ground as well.

Zuko jumped onto Cooler and pounded his face."You mean like Zhao!?" another punch."Or Azula!?" another punch."Or my FATHER!?" another punch."I'm so sick of being BETRAYED!" he cried shooting a burst of fire into Cooler's face, causing him to scream like a banshee."DO ME A FAVOR AND STAY DEAD!"

An explosion of ki blasted Zuko up into the ceiling; he fell on the floor. As he push himself back up, he saw Cooler on his feet, yelling with veins crawling along his limbs, then his limbs starting bulging. The room shook; Zuko stared wide eyed, as Cooler began to grow much, much taller; blades protruded from his wrist guards, four horns sprouted from his head. Zuko saw cracks forming throughout the control room. Cooler's red eyes bared down on the teen."Dead? You're about to wish YOU were dead!" a mask hid his face.

As Cooler charged, Zuko blasted him with all his might, right before Cooler bolted clean through the fire like there were none at all, gripped Zuko's throat, and slammed him into the window, so hard it cracked."I tried to help you, child," Cooler boomed,"And in return, you try to melt my face off. Is this how you treat your family's greatest ally?" he lean inches away from Zuko face."I'm practically your uncle..." he sneered.

"...you're..." Zuko wheezed."...not my uncle..." his fingers dug into Cooler's huge forearm "...you're a demon from hell...you're no better than you're brother...you have no right to set foot on my world..."

"You think I have no right?" Cooler hissed, tightening his grip on Zuko's neck. Cooler raised Zuko overhead."I have more right..." he pulled Zuko back "...THAN YOU COULD POSSIBLY KNOW!" he launched Zuko, shattering the glass and sending the teen screaming through the dark void.

Zuko fell through the blackness, until he landed on his back. Zuko immediately jumped to his feet, only then realizing he was standing on something: it was the metal floor of a tall white hallway, which reminded him of the royal palace back home.

"...frieza force..." hissed a voice that caused Zuko to twirl back to find the source.

"...Freiza Force..." growled an alien that looked and a good deal like Cooler, only he was a tad smaller than his original form and with a pair of black round horns on his head. He was angrily stomping in Zuko's direction, prompting Zuko to back out of the way.

Accompanying him was a tiny yellow alien with a pair of antenna on his lemon shaped head."Please, my lord, I must insist that this is not a good time to speak with your father, he has a very important guest today..." he stated quickly and nervously.

"...Frieza Force..." the Cooler-looking alien kept snarling, on his way to a large set of doors.

"Oh come now, Coola, you have to admit it has a rather nice ring to it-"

That was all the yellow dwarf managed to say before Coola grabbed his head, the head making a squeaking noise as he snatched him up to eye level."I'll RING YOUR NECK!" Coola roared before hurling the tiny alien like a football, bashing the doors open.

This brought instant shock to the face of King Cold, sitting at one end of his dinner table, along with the confusion of his guests.

"Coola, what's all this about!?" Cold exclaimed.

"The goddamn 'FRIEZA FORCE'!?" Coola thundered, "You're renaming our military after Frieza!?"

"Well, of course I am," Cold replied,"I'm going to retire soon; what else am I to name our forces?"

"How about naming it after me!?" Coola shouted."After all the work I've done for you, you're signing off your empire to that brat!?"

"Coola, could you please lower your voice..." Cold hastily requested, pointing to the guests on the other end of the table.

"Don't even call me that anymore!" Coola persisted."It just makes people confuse me for Frieza!"

"Well, what am I suppose to call you then!?" Cold wondered.

The yellow alien from before raised a dizzy finger."Well, believe or not, my liege, some of Coola's personnel have been referring to him as 'Cool-" he was interrupted by Coola's foot, causing a another squeaking sound and sending him flying out the window.

Cold wasn't so much angered by the display of violence as he was anxious."My son, I demand you calm down this instant-"

"You call me your son, and yet I'm beginning to think otherwise..." Coola scowled."Do you want to know what happened the other day? Ginyu approached me to compete with Salza for the spot as leader of my Armored Squadron; want to know why?" he inhaled,"BECAUSE HE THOUGHT I WAS F%^&ING FRIEZA! It's as if I no longer matter now that this lizard dwarf has arrived!"

"It wasn't my decision!" Cold tried again.

"WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN!?" Coola demanded,"You're the emperor of the universe! If putting Frieza in charge wasn't your call, then who's was it!?"

"That would be mine, thank you very much..." calmly replied another voice, with a raised clawed finger.

Coola whipped his head to the finger, which belonged to one of King Cold's aforementioned guests. He was a purple cat-like man donned in Space Egyptian garments; next to him sat a cyan skinned man in a red robe with a large ring around his neck, and a face that was even more effeminate than Frieza.

Coola was beyond confused, his mouth sagging as he stared frozen at the two."...Excuse you...?" he breathed as he started for them, but Cold quickly grabbed Coola's wrist.

"You heard me, Tall Frieza," the catman replied, not even looking at him."I'm the one that requested for Frieza to be the new emperor instead of you," he casually takes a sip of his stew."In fact, I'm thinking we should change the 'Chilled Clan' to the 'Frieza Clan'."

"The former does sound more like some kind of street gang..." the taller angelic man noted."Ooh! Why don't we name the whole race after Frieza?"

Coola turned to his father wide eyed."They're not serious..."

Cold shrugged."It's...honestly difficult to tell..."

"Don't get me wrong, Whatsyourname," the catman continued,"I'm sure you'd do your father proud on your own; but Frieza simply shows too much promise. I mean, he's already stronger than your father, and by extension, you."

At this, Coola rented his arm from his father's grip."Why don't you say that to my face!?"

"I would, but could you come closer? I don't feel like getting up," the catman replied.

"Glady..." said Coola through gritted teeth, but King Cold lept from his seat and latched his fingers onto Coola's shoulders."What is wrong with you!?" Coola demanded.

"Do you not know who this is!?" Cold exclaimed.

Again, the cat raised a finger."Hold on a minute, Cold, this boy's ignorance is entertaining me; I find it amusing when the oblivious ones try to puff themselves up at me," he remarked. He made an inviting gesture with his finger."Come now, walk over here so I can tell you to your face how your power is totally eclipsed by your baby brother's..."

Coola instantly elbowed his father in the kidney, and reappeared right before the guest, looking over him."First of all, you literal pussy, that is my seat that your ass is currently defiling, please take Frieza's seat. And second, I couldn't give a piece of shit who you are or why my father is kowtowing to you. I am Lord Coola of the Frost Demons, heir to the cosmos, and it is not your place to decide my fate. So my advice to you and your genderqueer friend would be to get up, leave Planet Cold, and begone from my sight, BEFORE I KILL YOU!" he outright shrieked in the cat's face, the entire palace resonated with the shock of his deafening voice like a thunderbolt, leaving a lip-tightening silence in his wake.

The mysterious guest had been slowly chewing a portion of boiled potato during Coola's entire rant, staring back up at him without emotion; finally, he swallowed, tentatively reach for his wine glass, gracefully slurped down the beverage, and swallowed again before clicking his and tongue and saying,"Make me."

Half the palace was vaporized by a gigantic ki wave, destroying the moon and several other moons behind it.

When the smoke cleared, King Cold was shocked out of his wits, but not as much as Coola was: miles of the area had been converted into a molten landscape, but the two guests were still sitting there, even though there were no chairs to sit on. Coola's whole body was frozen in place; his firing arm trembled an inches from the head he meant to annihilate."What in the holy hell...?" Coola exhaled.

"Something like that..." the cat muttered, before grabbing Coola's wrist and snapping it. Coola howled in agony, falling to one knee as the figure patiently arose from the no longer existing seat."Now I won't hold it against you for not knowing that I am in fact Beerus, God of Destruction, so I won't destroy your very soul due to the confusion. Nevertheless, I only require one of Cold's children to be my agent of destruction, and seeing as how pathetic that little attack you just threw at me was, it's obvious you are unfit for the role, and no longer have any reason to be part of the equation. So...my advice to you would be to accept your punishment with dignity, or getting killed will be the least of your worries..."

"And how will you punish him, Lord Beerus?" the cyan man asked.

As Coola desperately tried to free his broken hand from the god's grip, Beerus scratched his ear in contemplation."mm, I think I'll settle for abandoning him somewhere unpleasant; like Vampa, there's no water there..."

"But his kind can survive in the vacuum of space; he could in theory leave and return without a spaceship..."

"Crap, you're right," Beerus noted,"Perhaps I should just kill'em..." he felt his chin.

The blue man snapped his fingers."Oh I know! Why don't we just take him to Vegeta?"

At this, King Cold gained a quizzical expression."Vegeta? The king, the planet, or the baby?"

The blue man smirked."The void..." in the next beat, a staff appeared in his hand, which he used to tap the floor. The whole room flashed as they were all warped to another end of the universe. They all floated in the middle of outer space.

Cold took a look around, observing the star system."Wait minute...Isn't this the East Galaxy?"

"Yes it is," the blue man nodded."More importantly, I suggest you not float too far in that direction..." he pointed behind Cold.

Cold turned around."Why? What's over there?" he pointed there as well.

The blue man spread his arms dramatically."Gentlemen, what lies before you is...The Void of Vegeta."

"Vegeta...Vegeta...Vegeta..." his voice echoed.

"Does it do that all the time?" Cold asked.

The blue man maintained his dramatic pose."Only when you stay right in front of it and say...Vegeta."

"Vegeta...Vegeta...Vegeta..."

"Why is it named after King Vegeta?" Coola wondered.

"Vegeta...Vegeta...Vegeta..."

The blue man shrugged."Oh, something about him invading a planet within the solar system prior to the birth of the void, I dunno the details. You'd think Lord Beerus of all people would know..." he eyed the purple cat.

The god raised a brow."Why would I know what this is?"

The angelic figure sighed."Well, I all you need to know, is that any mortal that so much as enters this void with immediately lose all control of their life energy: no ki blasts, no flight, nada."

"Really?" Beerus asked,"What about gods?"

"Probably no effect," the blue man speculated."Point is, you throw Coola in there, and he will definitely never escape. Not even spaceship will function within the void."

"Me almighty!" Beerus replied."That sounds even worse than killing him."

"But this way, we can come back and get him whenever we want."

"Yeah, like that will ever happen..." Beerus glared at Coola."So, just so I have this clear: this mortal basically will lose all of his life energy, but still be alive, only completely weak and helpless, the very moment he..." Beerus slowly floated forward, extending the anxious Coola in front of him. A few feet further, and Coola screamed, not out of pain, but shock, as he could feel the effect of the void on his body. They all watched in awe as the purple ki streamed out of Coola's back, worming ever deeper into the void.

"Hot damn! You weren't kidding, Whis!" Beerus marveled."Yes, this'll be the perfect sentence. Any closing comments, Not-So-Coola?"

Coola wriggled all over the place."f-Father! Do something! Say something, Father!"

"Oh by all means, Cold, you're welcome to exchange places with your son, seeing as how you're retiring and all..." Beerus sneered.

The old emperor merely kept his arms folded behind him and looked away.

"Don't let him do this, Father!" Coola pleaded.

Cold was as silent as the space around him.

"And as Shenron would say, I bid you farewell..." Beerus stated, right before pulling back and vaulting Coola forth.

"FATHEEEEEER!" Coola squealed, his out reached hands growing ever apart from his father as all three vanished in the same light.

Zuko watched mournfully as the figure disappeared into the black just as he had minutes before."...wow...that Coola guy had it rough..."

"I'm Coola, shitforbrains..." Cooler stated, causing Zuko to scream.

"That was you!?" Zuko said.

"Yes, yes it was," Cooler answered, floating to Zuko's side."I was upstaged by my prodigy of a younger sibling, spoke out of turn to my superiors, and banished for one single mistake..." he eyed the prince."Hopefully, I don't have to state the obvious..."

Zuko just turned back forward."So this...void...is this where..."

"...your home planet is," Cooler finished."By the time I was awake, I was already in chains and in a naval ship commanded by General Iroh, who was known as Prince Iroh at the time. He was looking for the Avatar...and instead, he found me. My drained form was sealed away in their royal dungeon for months, until some woman took pity on me and left my cell unlocked when no one was looking; you know her..."

"...mom..." Zuko breathed.

"After that, I roamed Planet Avatar, living among the humans; it wasn't long before your world became my new home."

"What happened to your little horns?" Zuko couldn't help but ask.

"They were stupid and made me look like Frieza, so I stayed in this form from then on, but that's not the point," Cooler continued,"I never came here looking to harm your people, let alone your uncle, Zuko. It was a lucky accident that brought me here, and in retrospect, it only made me stronger. Perhaps your banishment could do the same..."

"I'm not just banished anymore; I'm a fugitive, a traitor; I'm nothing more than a disgrace to my father..." Zuko lamented.

"...because you let him make you one!" Cooler clenched his fist."You stood by and accepted the role he gave you: the worthless older child, overshadowed by the superior younger, it's all bullshit! I and Frieza died the exact same way; my father's opinion meant nothing in the end. I didn't need his approval, and you don't need your father's so-called honor! It's time for you to look inward, and begin asking yourself the big questions: Who are you? And what do you want?"

Poised with this question, the universe around Zuko froze, and all he could think about was what to do next...

Ki blade and ki-covered boomerang collided repeatedly; neither opponent gave the other any quarter.

"What zhe hell are you even trying to accomplish here!?" Salza demanded."Don't you want me to get off your planet? Or are you trying to avenge your poor monkey friend?" he taunted, effortlessly parrying Sokka's swings with one hand behind his back.

"You're gonna leave in pieces, friggin smartass!" Sokka cried, slicing at him with both hands gripping the boomerang.

"Ah, revenge it is..." Salza noted, before grabbing Sokka's left hand, and pulling him in for an elbow to the gut, sending him flying to other end of the room."By zhe way, you mentioned you were Water Tribe, yes?"

Sokka strenuously raised up to his feet."What about it?"

"I'm just curious: would zhat be the Southern Water Tribe?" he asked, dropping the accent to make sure Sokka understood."You know, zhe one wiz no more waterbenders?"

"You're not supposed to know that!" Sokka cried in annoyance."You're from outer space!"

"Oh, I know more zhan you zhink!" Salza dashed for Sokka, and the two continued exchanging blows."You zhink zhe Fire Lord was your biggest problem? You primitives have no idea, but you seriously dodged le bullet a few years ago, back when zhis planet's real ruler was still among you!"

Sokka block another fist with his forearm."Who are you talking about!?"

"Didn't I tell you already?" Salza ducked under a swing from Sokka."I was 'is right hand man!" he said before uppercutting Sokka up into the ceiling, wedging him in a small crater.

"Oh come on, Sokka, you had this!" Toph complained.

Salza happily dusted his gloved hands."Ah well, who's next? Zhe blind one perhaps?"

"You're a monster!" Katara shouted, still holding Aang.

Salza rolled his eyes."You know, I heard zhat Frieza made a mental list of heroic lines of zhose he killed and how many times he'd heard zhe same line; frankly, I've lost count of how many 'you're a monster!'s I've heard over ma life," he mocked, "and you're own people didn't exactly make it easier!" he grinned.

"What are you talking about?" Katara asked.

"I mean I AM in league wiz zhe Fire Nation, sweetie!" Salza pointed upward."And not only zhat, but I also was tasked wiz hunting down zhe Avatar, who was at zhe time presumed to have reincarnated into a Water Tribe native, which makes it very confusing for me to know zhat he was an Air Nomad all zhis time - my lord could have given zhe Fire Nation better points on wiping out races. Do you have any idea how many waterbenders I have killed!? I'm a Fire Nation hero!"

Katara could only scowl as she couldn't risk leaving Aang behind.

Salza shrugged."Ah, but alas, zhat chapter of ma life 'as finally come to a close: I have finally slain zhe Avatar, and just before Sozin's comet will arrive! You have no hope of winning zhiz war now, missy. And wiz ma lord's mission complete, I can leave zhis world and never come back." he affirmed, turning around and heading for the space craft."Zhat's why I'm zhe leader of Zhe Armored Squadron, zhe best of zhe best. You pests would 'ave 'ad better luck wiz Veget-"

The ceiling exploded, and two figures slammed feet first right in front of Salza.

"Vegeta!?" Salza gaped.

"Captain Salza?" Tarble realized.

"Zarbon?" Vegeta mistook.

"What in zhe f&^$ing frog legs are you two doing here!?" Salza exclaimed.

"A crash landing respectively," Tarble answered."What about you?"

"I...same?" Salza replied in confusion.

Vegeta turned around, seeing the spaceship."Finally!" he beamed

"Yes, Vegeta, finally..." Tarble eyed his older brother,"You have no idea how long it took for my brother to find his way back to this place."

"It's not my fault!" Vegeta protested."Do you know how many of these underground facilities there are under this lake!? I had to have crashed into every one of them by now!"

"You couldn't find your way to the restroom without a scouter," Tarble crossed his arms,"much less a spaceship."

"Wait, are you talking about ma ship?" Salza asked. Then he was angry."You were going to steal ma ship and abandon me here!?" the Space Frenchmen jabbed his finger in the Saiyan's direction.

"Would you have not done the same?" Vegeta retorted in a beat.

Salza paused."...Je vais concéder à cela..." he muttered. He sighed."Well, anyway, now that we're all in zhe same boat, why don't I give you a ride off zhis mud ball?" Salza offered.

"That sounds fan-f*&^ing-tastic, actually," Vegeta agreed.

"Wait a minute, brother," Tarble reminded,"We still have some loose ends with the Fire Lord..."

At this Salza laughed loudly, confusing the two Saiyans."I wouldn't worry about zhat anymore! I just solved zhat political issue maself: take a gander..." Salza announced, pointing a finger behind him.

Vegeta and Tarble peered behind the blue man, only to gain expressions full of shock beyond comprehension: what they saw was Katara cradling a seemingly lifeless Aang, a prominent hole near his heart.

"One dead Avatar à la mode de chez nous!" Salza happily presented. He whipped around and directed his open hand to Aang."You're not going to believe me: he was zhe guy zhat found me, and was stupid enough to set me free! Next zhing 'ee knew, zap, dead! Mission accomplished!" he cheered."And to zhink 'ow hard it was to find him at all, zhe irony iz just intoxicating..."

Of course, Vegeta was already deaf to his words. He could here nothing, save for an endless ring in his skull as if he'd been struck in the head by a nuclear missile. The world around him was black; all he could see was Aang, the echoes of Katara's crying briefly penetrated his personal abyss. His vision flickered between Aang and the last young man he saw on the ground, with a black hole in his chest...

"...Ah, but you probably have no idea what zhe hell I'm talking about..." Salza shook his head. He casually leaned his hands on the two Sayans' shoulders as beheld his handiwork."Let's all head to Spacey's and forget all zhiz shit ever happen-"

"I'll KILL YOU DEAD!"

The chamber lit up with Vegeta's Super Saiyan glow as he seized Salza by his throat.

"BAISE-MOI! PAS ENCORE-!" the blue alien shrieked before he was silenced by a gloved fist drilling into his stomach. Vegeta continued the arch upwards, carrying Salza off over head, spinning around, and driving Salza into the stone floor, blood spilling from Salza's mouth.

Vegeta dashed for Aang, stopping in front of him, and grabbing his head with both hands."Wake up, boy! Can you hear me!? Don't follow the light, Aang!"

Aang's lazy eyes drifted up to the Saiyan Prince; perhaps it was his consciousness slowly degrading, but he was fairly certain he saw a tear descend the man's cheek. But that vision was soon consumed by darkness.

"Aang! AAAAAAAAAANG!"

Frieza hummed to himself as he descended back down into the imaginary hell."Azula? Are you there?" he called rhetorically."I just thought I'd keep you up to speed on current events..." of course, he was quite shocked upon landing."Azula...?"

Frieza found himself staring at the exact replication of his prison, the only difference being it was without a prisoner: the cocoon hanging from the tree had been torn open.

"What in the-she's gone!?" the dead emperor exclaimed, looking everywhere for the girl. He inwardly demanded to know how she could escape, and where she was now; which was also confusing, as she couldn't be anywhere else, unless...

Frieza's puzzled face rose to the empty cocoon; his eyes then lit up with glee."She's...gone..." he marveled.

"She's gone!" Frieza excitedly cried out of Azula's mouth, frightening Cell.

"Whah! What?" Cell steadied himself as his asked."You weren't in there very long..."

"It actually happened, Cell!" Frieza announced, jumping out of Azula's palanquin. "I have consumed the princess's consciousnesses! I just went back into her mind, and she wasn't there!"

"And that counts as good news?" Cell's folded arms dropped.

"Of course it does, fool!" complained Frieza."If she's not in her own mind, where else could she be but oblivion? Hurrah for me! I'll bet that would have made Beerus proud!"

"Well, I'm not convinced, Frieza," Cell recrossed his arms."She could be hiding from you; wouldn't be that difficult against one who can't even sense ki..."

"You shut your hole, Bugman!" Captain Mai lurched in his face. "Lord Frieza is the ultimate conqueror! Surely not even the mental plain is free from his rule!"

"I'm going to tolerate your belligerence due to the hilarity of your current state..." Celled glared.

"It's obvious I have won, Cell," Frieza plainly stated."How sad, though; I don't think I can bare to inform poor little Ty Lee of the bad news..." he feigned sadness by posing like a Space Shakespearean performer.

"Actually, I heard everything you just said."

Cell, Captain Mai, and Frieza whipped their heads at Ty Lee, who just walked into Azula's tent.

They eyed her cautiously.

"I couldn't be more happy for you, Lord Frieza!" Ty Lee suddenly announced very gleefully as she bowed to Frieza. It was clearly her who had said it, and none of the Ginyu Force.

Perfect Cell was perfectly speechless."...wow...When you go to hell, give Brutus my regards..." he joked.

"I will," Ty Lee nodded.

But then, Captain Mai's eyes turned back to normal."YOU UNGRATEFUL BITCH! SHE WAS OUR FRIEN-!" Captain Mai then coughed and pounded Mai's chest."ahem...My apologies, I'm not used to inhabiting a body with the previous owner still inside..."

"All's right as rain, Ginyu!" Frieza clasped his hands girlishly - quite appropriate given his condition."Now then, shall we finally drop this charade and conquer this planet in the name of Frieza?"

"ALL HAIL LORD FRIEZA!" Captain Mai, Ty Lee, and the Ginyu force cheered, pumping physical and spiritual fist alike.

Cell looked away glibly."Not if Cooler has anything to say about it..."

"When I asked what you wanted," Cooler began,"My idea was quite far from this..."

Now standing on the sand of the outside, Zuko contentedly watched the flying bison reunite with the sky."It just felt right," Zuko simply replied."I couldn't let that animal suffer underground like that."

"Such a bleeding heart you are..." Zuko could tell Cooler rolled his eyes "...And what will you do when the Avatar finds his beast and leaves the city?"

Zuko looked down at the sand; he didn't want to answer. He turned over to his incapacitated uncle, whom he was carrying over his shoulder."For now, I just want to go home."

Cooler noted that he was referring to his apartment as "home"; he didn't care enough to point that out."Very well, prince; why don't you take the wheel?"

Zuko took off with his uncle back home.

Aang's raspy breath was barely audible to the group, but it was enough to relieve them.

The Dai Li agent put his stethoscope away. They saw him mutter to Long Feng."He's alright for the moment," Long Feng said.

They'd rushed Aang to the nearest medical chamber. In the presence of the nettled Super Vegeta, Long Feng had little choice but to offer the Avatar his services; so now Aang lie there in a cot, still unawake but alive.

"Well I'm just glad the Space Frenchy didn't aim for his head," Toph lamented as she stretched her stress away."Thanks for pulverizing'em, Vegeta."

"I would have done worse if I had more time..." Vegeta scowled behind him.

"I totally had that guy..." Sokka grumbled.

"When you're on the same planet as my brother, you better get used to that sentiment," Tarble folded his arms,"If stealing other's victories were an actual crime, he'd be sharing a cell with Moro by now..."

"Who the hell is Moro?" Vegeta raised a brow.

"Do yourself a favor, and forget I ever uttered that name,"replied Tarble with firm sincerity.

"I knew you'd come to our rescue, Vegeta," Katara said," we all figured you were just joking about conquering planets, like you always do," she smiled.

Katara's innocent face was the last thing in the universe Vegeta wanted to look at right now, aside from maybe Bulma's."Yep, boy do I have a dark sense of humor..." he tapped his foot awkwardly.

"Moving on," Toph changed the subject, whipping her finger at Long Feng,"I suggest you quit it with all the middle-man BS and let us discuss the war with the Earth King!"

The secretary quickly glanced at the Saiyans, and audibly exhaled through his nostrils."If it's the Earth King's approval for the invasion that you want, I can simply have him place his seal upon the document containing the plan; he doesn't even have to know what the document is."

"Deal," Toph nodded, skaking Long Feng's hand, no longer caring about the Dai Lai and their stupid conspiracy.

Upon the mention of the word "seal", Vegeta eyed Tarble."Can we talk outside for a moment?"

"Can we not explode through the ceiling this time?" Tarble retorted.

"Just walk with me, brother..." Vegeta growled, gesturing for his brother to follow him.

Long Feng watched the two godlike figures leave. How frustrated he was, as he stood there and watched these beings push him around. They were going to ruin everything, destroy the perfect utopia he spent his whole life building by letting the war reach past his grand walls. The Earth King was too incompetent to deal with this matter; he would never have to know anything if these damned aliens would stop budging in. Honestly, if he had to choose at this point, he wouldn't mind the Fire Nation just taking over the city already...

Something about that thought then made the secretary smile. He casually folded his arms behind him, and walked out of the room also.

The two Saiyans made their way into the chamber with the ship.

"mhm," The shorter Saiyan nodded."So if we want to break this curse, we need to find this magical seal that Avatar Yanchen created? How could someone like that created something so powerful?"

"If you think that's something, I seriously ought to introduce you to that little green boy and his pet Shenron," Vegeta noted.

"Please do, I would like to understand the other half of whatever you've been talking about lately," said Tarble."But what about the plan?"

Vegeta scowled at the floor and crossed his arms. In accommodation of Tarble's insistence not for aliens to offer a fleeting solution to this world's war, the "plan" was to make destiny go a little faster, by taking Aang directly to the Fire Nation, juicing him up with some ki, and letting him have at it with the Fire Lord. But along with Aang, that plan was slowly dying.

"I guess we are going to have to wait till the eclipse now," Tarble lamented.

"Unless, once again, we do it ourselves," Vegeta reminded.

"We can't, Vegeta," Tarble groaned."This world isn't ready for coexistence with extraterrestrial life; it has to be the Avatar."

Vegeta's mouth sagged; his brother had definitely fallen for the ruse. But this sparked inspiration within the Saiyan's excessively strained mind."Yes...the Avatar..."he smiled "...everyone needs to see the Avatar defeat the Fire Lord..."

"Exactly my point," Tarble nodded.

"They just need to see it happen..." Vegeta grinned slyly, his eyes ominously swerving towards Tarble.

"Yes, that's what I'm saying, so we're just going to have to wait for Aang to reco-" but Tarble paused, now noticing with a bit of nervousness the strange look he was on the receiving end of."I know I'm going to regret asking this, but why are you staring at me like that...?"

Vegeta grinned from ear to ear as he peered down at his brother - his diminutive, adorable, child-like brother."Tarble...have you ever considered a hair cut?"

Salza crawled his way out of the secret entrance, coughing up blood as he stammered up to his feet and lifting his arms to the sky."NO ONE expects zhe third heart!" he shouted in triumph. He then activated his scouter. "Now...let us see if I can find ma way back to zhe moonbase..." he muttered, flying away.