Disclaimer: Anything that rings a bell belongs to J.K Rowling

Chapter 15: Voiceless words

The candlelight glinted off the reflective surface and Sirius sighed, pulling the two-way mirror from his trunk.

He couldn't call James…what was he going to say? The slightest sign of discomfort he portrayed would have his best friend insisting Mr. Potter come and fetch him and that would defeat the whole sacrifice of coming here in the first place.

And he wasn't sure what to even tell Prongs… the conversation he had with his father was… baffling to say the least.

"Enter." Sirius complied, his face blank of any intrigue he felt as to why his father had called upon him.

Sirius had felt like a ghost this past week in Grimmauld Place. His father was away on business and Reg was staying over at Andy's, leaving him alone with Kreacher and Walburga, both of whom completely ignored his existence. Not that he was complaining, the silence, whilst deafening, was a more pleasing alternative to the constant cursing he was used to.

"Sit."

He complied, this being the second time in his life he had to occupy the black leather chair that stood across the large oak desk in his father's study; the first being the time his father had informed him that he was to escort Bellatrix and the girls to France last Summer and therefore he wouldn't be allowed to visit the Potters. He glanced at the crystal sphinx that lounged at the edge of the desk, the last time he spotted it, it had been just pieces upon the floor following his anger at the news.

"Here." He snapped his eyes up to his father, but Orion was already busy perusing a parchment, as a square, black box floated in front of Sirius.

He glanced at his father briefly but was smart enough not to wait for prodding from the man and plucked it up and popped it open.

A shiny black pocket watch floated out, Sirius knew the material well. Orion's signet ring was made of the same black Dragonstone, the rarest of all precious metal. Sirius reached forward and the cool Dragonstone caressed his skin, he turned it over, seeing his birth date engraved on the back and a singular word. Nobilitas.

Nobility.

Sirius didn't know what he expected and was annoyed that he was disappointed in the detached word that paid reference to his lineage.

What was he expecting? He pocketed the watch without saying a word. It was more a rite of passage for turning seventeen than a gift, and the Blacks were nothing if not traditional.

"I have business in Moscow next week and you will accompany me." Sirius didn't respond knowing it was not a question. His father finally laid the parchment down, eyes the same fathomless grey that sat in his own face gazed at him lazily. "As a man, and the future head of this family, you should take interest in the cogs that make it run so smoothly. Your mother likes to think that her blood can live on old money forever, she doesn't like to dirty her mind with talk of gold, and I fear she's put the same naiveté in you boys. Regulus can afford the luxury of ignorance, but not you."

Sirius didn't respond, it was more beneficial for Regulus to be sitting here, rather than him, considering he will be gone the first chance he gets. Uncle Alphie told him that father had released his hold on the matters in Central Europe, but that he can just as easily change his mind before negotiations are done, and therefore Sirius' behaviour should be as polite as possible for the remainder of the holiday.

"Also, I have made a deposit of a small percentage of your inheritance into your personal vault."

Sirius didn't expect this, watches were customary coming of age gifts, but not money and not from his father. Money was a means of control in this family, it was a means of keeping people in check. Well, he did say small percentage…

"Alphard tells me that you have a… friend…"

Orion's back seemed to straighten in discomfort, "And I understand the need for tokens and gifts and such, and a man shouldn't have to ask permission to use family funds for such things. Granted she's not a pureblood but surely they have to be wooed all the same." He pushed his black clothed back into his chair and Sirius narrowed his eyes… he never thought Uncle Alphie would spy on him.

"I don't have a…friend." Sirius spoke, and he angered himself in his fragility.

Orion didn't respond, and Sirius couldn't understand where the conversation was going and why his father would be okay with him pursuing a relationship with a half-blood.

Just then Sirius remembered that he had something to ask his father and cleared his throat in what he hoped was inconspicuous but garnered his father's attention, nevertheless. "I have a request." Godric, he sounded like he was applying for a loan at Gringotts. "After Yuletide morning I will like to leave for the afternoon, the Potters are having a party and I wish to attend."

"I thought the Potters will be visiting France this Yule season." Sirius stilled, he didn't expect his father to know that. Before he had to make something up, Orion waved his arm dismissively, "Either way you may go." He picked up another parchment and stared at the heading, "And perhaps that boy of theirs would like to visit with us at New Year."

Sirius schooled his surprise… did his father just ask James over? For New Year?

"I'll let him know of the invite."

"Good. We'll leave on the 26thfor Moscow and be back the eve of the New Year." Sirius knew the circling back of the original topic was a dismissal and he stood, nodding his head in farewell, and walking away.

"Sirius?" He glanced away from the mirror, shoving it back into his trunk as he turned around just as Regulus walked into his room, his usual pale features brightened by the cold, his blue-grey eyes uncharacteristically alive as he stared at his older brother, "You came… you came back?"

Before Sirius could respond he was jilted in shock as his brother flung his arms about him, and after a moment of hesitation he returned the gesture, "I knew you would come back. I knew you wouldn't leave me."

He was completely speechless, this was the same brother that ignored his existence for the past six months, who stood back and watched him get attacked…

But the desperation in the embrace made Sirius' heart forgiving. Sirius' arms tightened about the boy who felt as slight as when he fell ill after sneaking into their mother's potions lab and inhaling a bit of doxy venom. Just like he did when he was six years old, Sirius felt guilty at being responsible for his brother's pain, naturally it was his idea to sneak into the lab in the first place, and he sought to rectify it with cuddles and affection. Sirius was far too old to cuddle his brother, but a good private hug should be allowed.

Just as he registered the footsteps beyond the door, Regulus straightened off him, in unspoken agreement that this moment should be kept private.

Sirius was free for a just a moment until a mass of chestnut curls enveloped him, "You're back! Oh, you're home!"

Much more comfortable with holding Andy, Sirius spun her around a bit, and was surprised by soft lips on his cheek. He glanced down to see Narcissa tearing up at him. The girl really could cry at anything and he politely returned the peck on her cheek.

"Well, if this isn't just the most touching scene." Narcissa tensed as Andy straightened her back. Regulus had already detached himself from the affair and was staring out the window as Bellatrix entered, bringing the outside frost with her with her rosy cheeks and icy smile. She held out her hands, "Well, where's my hug?"

"In Hell with the rest of your belongings."

Bellatrix laughed, "Sticks and stones may break my bones but muggle phrases will only hurt you. Watch your tongue cousin, you're not with the blood traitors anymore. Filthy talk like that might have you writhing on the floor again like your blonde friend from down the street."

Sirius' jaw clenched but before he could say a thing Andy stopped him with a hand on his chest, "Bella, have you forgotten father's words already? The past shall remain in the recesses of our mind, and we should look only to the future."

Andy turned with a wide smile on her face and straightened Sirius' collar for him, "Even father is happy that you're back. He gave us a speech about being nice to you before we left home tonight. I feared Regulus may get himself splinched on his way here in his excitement."

Well that explains why Reg wasn't home, he didn't even know of Sirius' return until today. Something told Sirius that was his mother's doing.

"Like he could have splinched himself." Bella rolled her dark eyes; she must have taken him on side-along apparition. It was tricky to do so, Sirius never tried it, though he was still getting a hang on apparition, only having this house to practice in until they officially started lessons at school, but of course his cousin had. Bellatrix had the promise of more nasty things to say but there was a soft knock on the door, and Kreacher bowed in, announcing dinner.

"Shall we." Andy's warm brown eyes smiled up at him as she looped her arm about his and he watched as Bellatrix smirked evilly at the pair of them and trounced downstairs.

-x-x-x-

James gasped awake and pulled at the blankets that were drenched with sweat, tangled about him in frustrating confinement until he finally extricated himself and fell with a painful thud onto the carpeted floor of his bedroom.

The wind rattled against the closed window as his breath puffed out in front of him in three quick pants as he jumped to his feet, recalling just what had woken him.

He crossed the passage with ease, and pushed the door open, crossing the room to the flailing being that was drowning in the large bed, "Wake up! Jude. It's a nightmare! Wake up!"

The lack of sound always made her struggle more frightful as her black eyes finally sprung open and she backed away against the glossy black headboard as James lit the lamp next to her.

Her strained cheeks were bright red and wet with perspiration or tears, he wasn't sure. Her breathing slowed down to normal as she took in her surroundings with quick glances and James watched as her body slowed to still.

"I'm sorry." He spoke to his knees, recalling the events of yesterday. He had spent just over a day in his room, sulking. His mood fluctuating from guilt to justified anger to a level of petulance he never felt before.

It didn't help that his parents had not called him down for food, rather his mother had magicked him some sandwiches into this bedroom… they didn't want to see him… and he didn't blame them.

He could barely stomach his reflection these days. Half of him didn't know who stared back at him in that mirror, and the other half thought he did know and didn't like the knowledge at all.

James felt guilty for his words yesterday, a guilt that increased with the nightmare they had shared… he couldn't make out much except the heat of flames about him in the dream, and his heart beat painfully in his chest from the gripping fear.

He heard scratching that broke him from his reverie, and he looked to Jude who was now holding up a parchment to him.

It's okay.

The two words shone in black ink, so significant to him as if it were the incantation to the most powerful spell.

She just wrote…to him?

He glanced about, half wanting to jump up and wake his parents but so afraid to move just in case it will deter her…

This was the first time she communicated with anybody, even via writing… the Healers said they had tried on multiple occasions but she refused to write…

He registered that she awaited a response and reached forward for the parchment, but she pulled it to her chest protectively and his face broke into a guilty smile, "I suppose you don't want to talk to me. I will wake up mum."

He made to stand but stopped at the scratching noise.

No. You can talk. With your voice. You don't need a quill… you're normal.

James' shoulders fell as he read the last word, "I didn't mean what I said yesterday. I was angry, not at you." He swallowed, weighed down with guilt. "Can you talk? I mean…have you tried."

She immediately opened her mouth and soft rasping, inaudible sounds trickled out and he quickly held his hands up, "Maybe we shouldn't push it. "

She stopped immediately, staring at him for a few moments. James liked to imagine that there was a little life in her eyes now, "Why have you never…written before?"

She dipped her head slightly and stared at the parchment before she began.

I didn't think you wanted me to.

"Of course I do. We all do. Mum… Dad… Evans…" He frowned, just as something dawned on him, "Who attacked you that night, in your dorm?"

She began scribbling immediately.

I don't know. I just woke up when I felt something wet. All I heard was somebody running away, and then my skin started burning…I didn't mean to hurt Lily.

James watched as she let the ink seep further into the full stop as she seemed to look for the right words. He covered her hand to stop her, "That's okay. We'll find them eventually. Is there anything you remember? About your past?"

She shook her head in the negative.

He stared at her dark strands which stuck out in disarray as she began to write on the parchment again.

I didn't like that. What was happening when I was sleeping. I feel funny. On my skin. Like when you get out of the bath and walk to the towel. Like my hair on my neck is up. It doesn't feel nice.

James read as she wrote and rubbed at the bridge of his nose, just realising he was missing his glasses, "That was a nightmare. It wasn't real. You're just on edge. Nothing can hurt you here. You're safe.

It felt real. It hurt. Here.

She pointed to her temple and James looked to the door again, maybe he should wake his parents up. But he was so afraid to leave at the same time… as if this was a delicate thread that existed only in these four walls and his leaving would tear it asunder.

He ran a hand through his hair, he felt incredibly stuffy from the restless sleep and his shirt clung to him. Suddenly the window flew open, and he looked down at the girl in the bed in astonishment.

"How do you do that? How do you know what I'm feeling?"

She shrugged and then scribbled on the parchment.

I know you like the wind in your hair. You put your hand in your hair when you want to be in the wind. Right?

He narrowed his eyes and scratched the back of his neck, "It's not so much the wind, but the flying that I like. On my broomstick."

She nodded and placed the quill down, rubbing her right hand against her left elbow, holding herself within her arms for comfort. She was evidently done talking but she still wasn't comfortable. He couldn't leave her but at the same time he didn't want to stay either.

He narrowed his eyes as she rubbed at the back of her neck in discomfort. "I have an idea…"

-x-x-x-

"It's disgusting. It's not enough that she has debased herself by marrying a Weasley, but now they've immortalised their abhorrence and had another child. And they've christened him with Ignatius' name!" Lucretia shrieked from her end of the table, her husband Ignatius quietly eating his third slice of chocolate cake next to her, "She's done it on purpose, Molly always was a spiteful child."

Uncle Alphard laughed, "Well I always thought it was an act of respect, giving a child the name of a loved one. I hear it's just a middle name Lucy, so it can't be all that bad."

Lucretia scoffed at her cousin whilst Walburga glared at her brother for the nickname she disapproved off, "We want no ties with that family, Ignatius has made it quite clear."

Sirius doubted Ignatius Prewett ever made a single thing clear in his life, he sometimes wondered if the man was deaf, or perhaps that was the only way of keeping his sanity after years of a childless marriage to his father's sister.

"Well, it seems to be a trend these days, having many children. More than two seems so distasteful and unnecessary." Walburga pushed away her custard tart with disdain and Sirius watched as Bellatrix's mother, Druella, turned a nasty, but silent shade of purple. The fact that she hadn't fathered a son was a matter of embarrassment to her husband,Cygnus, and was the only reason they had more than two children in the first place and Sirius watched as the man steadily drank his whiskey at the comment.

"The Malfoys never have more than one son." Narcissa smiled dreamily at her barely touched cheesecake, "Lucius told me, we'll have one perfect son." She smiled and slipped a small bite into her mouth.

Sirius was lucky that he and Andy were seated next to each other and therefore it was easy to avert his eyes and stifle his laughter, something that often happened when mentioning the prat that was Narcissa's fiancé.

"It's a wonder how the Malfoys' even manage to father children considering they lack the required equipment." Bellatrix smirked as Narcissa frowned in confusion from next to her.

"Bella." Druella chided as Cygnus Black poured another shot down his throat.

"What? All I'm saying is that for a name so revered they're quite cowardly. Just yesterday I read in the paper that Abraxas Malfoy has donated more money to the Ministry, a Ministry that is trying to thwart the Dark Lord, someone they claim to support."

"Enough." Orion spoke at the head of the table and Bellatrix glared and pouted, but remained silent, "We won't discuss such matters. And if you're so mature to bring up such things Bellatrix, be mature enough to read between the lines, especially when reading the prophet."

Sirius was surprised that his father had stopped her. His father always detached himself from these dinners, feeling above even pretending to pay attention, and he never gave advice. That was usually Uncle Alphie's role, whilst Cygnus nursed his drink and brooded, and Ignatius ate his body weight in food.

Bellatrix looked as if she was going to explode, but Sirius actually agreed with his father. Surely she could see that Abraxas Malfoy was merely trying to worm his way into the ministry for none other than Voldemort himself.

"Speaking of the Prophet, I've spoken to a friend about Summer internships. I know Andy is keen on journalism, Maffie tells me there's just one other candidate, Rupert Skeeter's daughter, but she said she's not too keen on the girl, bit more of a gossipmonger than a real reporter. So-"

"I'll stop you right there Alphard, Andromeda is not working for the Daily Prophet." Cygnus placed his glass down and stared at his brother, "And I find it insulting that you would even bring up such a thing."

Sirius glanced at Uncle Alphard, but he wasn't fazed in the least, he did know how to tread the waters of this family, "I don't mean to insult you, and I don't expect Andromeda to work for the Prophet. It's just a Summer internship to see if she likes the world of journalism."

"Well, she doesn't." Druella spat.

"Mother!" Andy bit out, turning to Uncle Alphie, "Thank you so much Uncle Alphard. I'll surely-"

"Do nothing." Druella threatened and Andy's hand stiffened next to his.

"That would be a pity." Sirius spoke up, "Andy is quite the writer, and there is honour in such work."

Cygnus scoffed, "Selling paper is not her future."

"Especially garbage like the Daily Prophet." Bellatrix rolled her eyes and Sirius turned on her.

"Garbage you read every day."

"Then what is my future?" Andy questioned so quietly with such fear Sirius' heart broke a little.

"To be married of course." Narcissa simply smiled, immune to the tension about her, "A husband and a family."

"And much more." Bellatrix added darkly, "Not working for money but a greater goal…"

"What if I don't want that." Sirius placed his palm over Andy's hand to stop the shaking.

"Speaking of your future, we have some news. I was speaking to Madame Lestrange, and she tells me that Rabastan has taken quite a liking to you." Sirius' heart froze at his uncle's words as Andy's face turned sheet white.

"No." Sirius whispered.

"He has too." Druella misconstrued Sirius' whisper, "And why wouldn't he? Andromeda is lovely, and the Lestranges are far better than any other option. We considered the Prewett twins, but Lucretia tells of the kind of company they keep, the Potters are blood traitors, and the others are all much too beneath her. Rabastan will make a fine match. And you will already have Bella in the family-"

"No." Sirius said more loudly, "She will not be marrying Rabastan Lestrange."

"Well, you don't have a say in it." Bellatrix snapped at Sirius.

"Actually, he does." Cygnus placed his drink down. "Quite frankly Andromeda has two options, become a Lestrange or remain a Black."

"Then she'll remain a Black." Sirius nodded, for once grateful that he's opinion as future head of the House finally could be of use, "She'll always have a home here, she'll never be forced into marriage."

"You misunderstand Sirius-"

"Cygnus." Orion spat but his uncle cut across.

"She'll remain a Black but not by her own doing, but by marriage."

Sirius let that sink in for a frosty moment…

"She's not marrying him." Bellatrix screeched.

"Isn't that incest?" Regulus pondered as Narcissa stared at him, "Who? Who's Andromeda to marry?"

"You can't be serious Orion." Uncle Alphard looked to his friend, "They're…they're family."

"Was Orion not our family, Alphard." Walburga smirked, "Your playtime with muggles has sullied your mind. There is naught wrong with this arrangement."

"I…I…I…can't…" Andy seemed to be having a panic attack as Sirius looked to his father.

"Agreement? So, you've already decided on this matter."

Orion stared at his son, "I won't force you to marry or choose your bride for you, though I have spoken to Cygnus and have to agree that it is time for Andromeda to find a match. She's waited much too long and as the head of this house I agree that they can only be two matches that seem the most beneficial. You don't have to marry Andromeda if you do not wish it. But Andromeda will be engaged by the end of this year."

"I…I…" Andy jumped up from the table and fled at her uncle's words and Sirius rose to go after her.

This was complete madness! That meant that his options was either to marry Andromeda or let her get married to Rabastan Lestrange, and he'd sooner kill the man than bless that union.

"Andy." Her feet had automatically taken her to his bedroom which was now filled with rasping sobs, "Andy, Andy." He pulled her to his chest, seeking the right words, ones that were not riddled with empty promises.

"I can't Sirius…I can't." She pulled off him and wiped at her cheeks roughly but that did nothing to stem the flow. "I can't marry him!"

"I know love. And I will never let that happen!" Sirius gripped her by the elbow to show her just how serious he was.

Her face paled and her eyes glazed over and he pulled her closer in fear that she was about to faint, "I love him."

"What?" Sirius' heart clenched…was she going mad?

She snapped her head up at Sirius as if just realising he was there, suddenly she ripped her hands out from him and rushed to the window, "I have to get out of here."

Sirius lunged at her before she could take another step, afraid she'd do something drastic and he shut the window with his wand, "Andy…calm down…we'll think of something!"

"There's nothing. I can't." She sagged into him, and he supported her, "I can't be without him." She crossed to Sirius' writing desk and riffled through the parchment, "Ted…Ted…"

"You can write to Ted some other time."

"No! I have to tell him! He has to… I can't…" She stopped and fell to the floor in frustration, her long cream dress pooling at her feet as Sirius kneeled in front of her as she lay her head on her folded arms in defeat, "I love Ted, Sirius. I can't… I can't…"

Sirius touched her shoulder gently, "Andy… Ted is with Sarah. Sarah Fawley… your best friend."

She shook her head profusely and then glanced up, "No. No, he isn't. She's just covering for me. Ted and I… Ted and I have been together for months…" She took a heaving breath, "I love him. I'll die before I marry another. "

Sirius heard footsteps and pulled her to her feet and wiped at her face, "Listen. Don't speak of this. Just calm down and let me handle this. Okay?" He pecked her on the forehead just as the door swung open and he looked crossly at Bellatrix.

"Careful cousin, save some for the wedding night." Sirius glared at her, knowing that she'd choose to ridicule him over compassion for her sister's ordeal.

"I suppose I will." Sirius responded just as Narcissa and Regulus entered, Narcissa baffled, and Regulus blank faced.

"What!" Bellatrix snapped.

"You heard right Bella. I will. I'm marrying Andy."

Bellatrix bared her teeth and grabbed for her wand, but Regulus stopped her, "Don't."

She pushed him away and glared at Sirius, "You will never marry MY sister! Rabastan is-"

"Never coming near her!" Sirius snapped and took a threatening step towards her, "So you get that idea out of your head NOW!"

"Surely there is another way, Sirius." Regulus glanced up at his brother, expectantly. "Surely there is someone else. Anybody else."

Bellatrix scoffed, "Yes idiot. You. Surely you see that's the third, unspoken option. Rabastan looking like a good offer now, isn't it?"

Regulus' only response was letting go of Bella and turning to Sirius for confirmation.

Sirius pulled Andy by her wrist as he approached the exit, slowing down at Bellatrix and glaring right back at her. "You needn't worry about that, because as I said. I am marrying Andromeda."

A/N: Well... that's quite a statement. What do you think Sirius is going to do?

Feedback as always is appreciated!

Kalina