Chapter XI: The Loudest Mission

"Why do you want me to drive you all the way to Great Lakes City, Lori?" Logan asked from behind the wheel of his DeLorean.

"I need to see my Bobby Boo-Boo-Bear, and Vanzilla's still in the shop," Lori replied from the passenger's seat. "You were my only alternative."

"Why do I have to get dragged into this, though?" Lincoln asked from the back seat.

"You want your girlfriend to stay in Royal Woods, too, don't you? Plus, I need your skills as the Master of Convincing."

"Hey! Ronnie Anne is not my girlfriend! She's a close friend who just happens to be a girl!" Lincoln complained.

"You two are just lucky that Geoff texted me about something he wanted me to see," Logan said with a sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose. "So, tell me more about this Bobby guy. Does he treat you alright?" he asked in order to change the subject.

"Oh, he's one of the sweetest guys I've ever met! He's been doing his best to help provide for his family, because his mom's salary alone won't cut it. He's been an amazing big-brother figure to Lincoln, too," Lori said.

"You don't have to worry, Logan, he already meets Mom and Dad's standards," Lincoln added.

"Does he meet MY standards, though?" Logan asked, making both Lori and Lincoln fall silent. After a moment, Logan chuckled and said, "Just kidding. I may be your protective big brother, but I'll only step in if he does something to hurt you. The way you talk about him, he doesn't need my approval." Lori and Lincoln sighed in relief.

...

Logan pulled into the parking lot of the apartment complex/convenience store owned by the Casagrande family.

"You didn't tell me your boyfriend was related to the Casagrandes," he said to Lori. "They're just about the nicest people I've met in this city! Besides Mel and her dad, of course." They all walked into the Mercado, as the convenience store was called, to see Hector Casagrande taking a nap behind the counter. He was a squat, balding Hispanic man with a silver mustache. "Hola, Hector!" Logan shouted and tapped a bell that said "ring for service." Hector woke up with a snort and blinked several times before grinning widely.

"Logan! I haven't seen you in ages, amigo!" he shouted back and shook Logan's hand eagerly. "Have you reunited with your familia yet?"

"That I have, Hector. As a matter of fact, I brought two of them with me. These are my siblings Lori and Lincoln. Lori told me she's dating one of your relatives, and Lincoln's friends with the same relative's sister."

"Ah, yes, I've heard all about the two of them! BOBBY! YOU HAVE VISITORS!" Hector bellowed to the other end of the store.

"Coming, Abuelo!" A tall Hispanic boy slightly shorter than Logan ran out of one of the aisles, carrying a mop and wearing a white apron over a green flannel shirt and jeans. "Babe!" he cried, and he and Lori embraced. It was then that Logan recognized him.

"Hey, I know you! You're Nurse Santiago's kid!" Bobby looked at him, confused.

"Uh, babe? Who's this?" he asked.

"You remember my big brother Logan, don't you, Bobby?" Bobby didn't answer. "You met him that one time you, Carol, and Chaz came for a sleepover?"

"Oh, you're the cool dude playing the guitar!" Bobby exclaimed once the memory kicked in. "How do you know my mom?"

"Mom? I was talking about your dad." Logan noticed the uncomfortable look on Bobby's face while Lori rubbed her boyfriend's shoulder. "Did I say something wrong?"

"It's not your fault, dude. Dad got promoted with the opportunity to work at a station in Peru. Mom didn't like that, and they had a falling-out that ended in divorce. That was five years ago, while you were gone," said Bobby.

"I'm sorry to hear that. Anyway, I'd better go see what my friend wants. You and Lincoln have fun, Lori!" Logan said and took his leave. He drove to Mel's mansion, which had Geoff's workshop in the basement. Mel and Geoff were actually in a relationship, which was why they lived together. That, and Mel claimed that the mansion felt empty without Logan around. Logan walked into the workshop to the sight of Geoff working on a project with someone he didn't expect.

"Greetings, eldest male sibling."

"Lisa? What are you doing here? More importantly, how did you get here?"

"I am your friend's partner now, to answer your first question. To answer the second, I came via the handheld teleportation device that I invented myself," Lisa stated. "I know about your job in the Central Intelligence Agency, and I approve of it." Geoff chuckled nervously when Logan glared angrily at him.

"Sorry, Logan, but I couldn't resist. Your sister is on-par with Einstein and Tesla! Together, our technological genius is nearly unrivaled!"

"Alright, fine. What was it that you wanted to show me?" Logan asked.

"I've been working on some new prototype equipment for your missions around the globe, and I completed a few pieces with Lisa's help." Geoff took the tarp off of a large project, revealing a platform with wings on either side and a trio of rockets in the back, all in the steampunk color scheme that Logan preferred. "This is a jet-propelled glider. The rider stands on the platform and steers it by shifting their weight from foot to foot. Your safety is assured due to mechanisms that automatically strap your feet to the platform."

"You watched Tobey Maguire's Spider-Man too many times, didn't you?" Logan accused, noticing the craft's uncanny similarity to Green Goblin's glider in the movie.

Geoff cleared his throat uncomfortably and said, "Moving on. I know you've had issues with your targets identifying you, so you'll probably like this next project of mine." He handed Logan a brown-and-gold wristwatch. "Put on the watch and twist the face one hundred eighty degrees clockwise." Logan did so, and his whole body was engulfed in a gold glow. When the glow faded, he was wearing a long hooded coat with the same black-and-copper pattern as his ordinary jacket. The bottom hem of the coat reached his calves, and his forearms were encased by copper-colored metal armguards. Across his chest was a strap with a sheathed sword. Under the coat, he wore a tan shirt, black pants, his holstered guns, and his original boots. "I had trouble with the matter-phasing device that would allow the costume to cover your body instantaneously, but Lisa spotted the mistake I made with the design. The fabric, also designed by Lisa, is Kevlar, reinforced to withstand a fifty-caliber bullet without injury to the wearer. The sword is twenty-eight inches of titanium-reinforced high-carbon steel with a gold finish, and the hand-and-a-half grip makes it compatible with both one-handed and two-handed fighting styles. The armguards have concealed blades that eject along the backs of the hands."

"I understand that the hood can be used to hide my hair, but what about my face?" Logan asked.

"That's where these come in," Lisa said hand handed him a new pair of goggles that looked identical to the ones he currently wore. "Put these on over your eyes and tap the nosepiece twice." Logan slipped off his old goggles and did as Lisa said. Immediately, microscopic machines surged out from inside the lenses, covering the bottom half of Logan's face in a mesh of coppery nanoparticles. "As you can see, the nanotechnology stored in the goggles creates a mask that will hide your identity. The mask will also supply fresh oxygen if you find yourself in an environment full of smoke or other airborne toxins."

"Wow, you guys thought of pretty much everything, didn't you?" Logan asked, actually impressed by Geoff and Lisa's handiwork. He drew the sword strapped to his back, which was single-edged and curved like a katana. It was perfectly balanced, feeling like an extension of his arm, and whistled as he swung it experimentally.

"Indeed we did," said Lisa. "Seeing as they're only prototypes, may I have the watch and goggles back to make duplicates in case of an emergency?"

"I don't see why not," Logan said and turned the face of the watch in the opposite direction to take his new costume off. Tapping the nosepiece of the goggles once caused the nanotech mask to retract back into the lenses. He then handed both items back to Lisa, put his old goggles back on, and took his leave.

...

While the majority of his family was upstairs in the apartments, which he was glad for, Hector was sweating nervously as he handed cash from the register to a masked man pointing a machete at him. Unexpectedly, a gunshot was heard mere nanoseconds before the machete's blade snapped off at the handle. Both the robber and Hector turned to the doorway, where Logan stood and blew on his pistol's smoking muzzle with a smug smile. With his only weapon gone, the robber dropped the handle of the machete and put his hands behind his head. The neighborhood patrol cop (whom Logan knew personally) picked him up moments later, and Logan and Hector made their way upstairs.

Logan had visited the large Casagrande family numerous times over the years, and had memorized all of their names. Hector primarily ran the Mercado, while his wife Rosa placed herself in charge of the upkeep of the apartments. Hector and Rosa's son Carlos was a professor at Fairway University, and formerly tutored Logan in science, math, and conversational Spanish. Carlos's wife Frida was a professional photographer, and also painted on occasion. The eldest of Carlos and Frida's four children, Carlota, was a high school senior who made money off of her fashion and makeup blog. After Carlota came Carlos Junior, or CJ, who was a fifth grader with Downs syndrome. After CJ came Carl, a troublemaking six-year-old who always tried to pick Logan's pockets to make a quick buck (unsuccessfully of course). The youngest of the Casagrande children was baby Carlitos. He was exactly the same age as Lily, and now that he thought about it, Logan could see multiple similarities between this family and his own.

"Logan! Good to see you again, mi amigo!" Carlos said and shook Logan's hand. He was taller than Hector but shorter than Logan, with neatly combed black hair that had a single gray streak, rectangular glasses, and a brightly colored sweater vest over a pale-yellow dress shirt and brown slacks. He introduced Logan to a slightly shorter woman wearing hospital scrubs with her hair in a bun. "This is my sister Maria. She and her kids are gonna be living with us while she works at the hospital."

"Maria Santiago, nice to meet you," the woman said with a tired but warm smile and shook Logan's hand. Logan could just make out dark circles and Crow's Feet around her eyes.

"Logan Loud. You've probably met my brother and sister by now," Logan introduced himself.

"Yes I have, numerous times. I swear, you Louds are breeding like rabbits!" Maria proceeded to tell stories of her encounters with his family, from regular check-ups to Lynn's sports-related injuries and everything in between. "It was my ex-husband who treated most of Lynn's problems. Despite claiming to be tough as nails, that girl was so sensitive that he was the only one who could hold her down long enough!" Logan had a good laugh at Lynn's expense. Before long, two doors in the hall opened, and out walked Lori and Bobby from one room and Lincoln and a girl in a purple hoodie from the other.

"Did you guys have a good time?" Logan asked.

"Could have been better, but not bad all in all," Lincoln answered.

"So this is the long-lost brother you told me about?" the other girl asked.

"Yup. Logan, this is my friend Ronnie Anne, Bobby's little sister." Logan and Ronnie Anne exchanged greetings before Lori and Lincoln said they were ready to go home. Logan almost got dive-bombed by a brightly colored parrot, but his reflexes proved to be too quick, as he caught the parrot by the throat without even looking.

"You try that again, Sergio, and I'll stuff you like the undergrown turkey you are," Logan growled.

"Rawwk! Aw, so close!" the parrot said in fluent English. Logan, Lincoln, Lori, Bobby, and Ronnie Anne all walked out to where Logan's car was parked, and they said their goodbyes. Lincoln seemed surprised when Ronnie Anne hugged him.

"She's kinda cute, isn't she?" Logan asked with a knowing wink when he and his siblings were all in the car.

"Oh, come on! Not you, too!" Lincoln griped.

Tell me how I did with this reinterpretation of the episode The Loudest Mission. I would appreciate it if you did!