A/N: I'm so so so sorry for how late this is!

(I blame the nearly 7,000 words of Zeref x Reborn fic I wrote this weekend instead – it stole ALL my creative juices, and getting this chapter done was HELL)

(also I'm sorta drowning in reading Dabi/Hawks fics which is just pathetic considering I haven't even watched enough of BNHA to have met Dabi OR Hawks yet)

(the fics are so good tho)

(also I'm a maladaptive daydreamer whose head has been having fun with Dabi/Duo which is just a massive pile of WTF-ery so I think it might be safe to say I'm just in shipping hell rn)

(basically, everything boils down to this: PLEASE KILL ME IMMEDIATELY I THINK I BROKE MYSELF AND I DON'T KNOW HOW ELSE TO FIX IT)

…yeah please send help at your earliest convenience or at least advice on how to get a brain to STOP shipping the weirdest and most ridiculous pairings possible.

I mean seriously. I can SORTA see where Zeref/Reborn came from (I really can't it was 3 am there is no justifying it) but the Dabi/Duo pairing just came out of fucking nowhere and I don't know WHY PLEASE WHY?

So yeah. I hope the chapter's decent, and hopefully my brain gets off its wacky shipping before I gotta write the next one because this is getting ridiculous THAT ZEREF/REBORN FIC IS THE SECOND-LONGEST CHAPTER I'VE EVER WRITTEN (6700 words, vs Girl's Mind Chapter 5's 7900) AND I WISH MY BRAIN HAD THAT MUCH EFFORT TO GIVE FOR THIS FIC WHY BRAIN WHY IS IT ALWAYS OTHER FICS?!

*cries eternally*

"Thank you, Yamanaka-san." Kakashi offers quietly, feeling Naruto and Sasuke's stares bore through the wall and into his back.

When they stepped out to discuss his condition, Natsu was still unconscious.

"It's no problem, Kakashi," Inoichi returns, glancing once at the door. It doesn't reassure Kakashi, even though there's nothing especially concerning about Inoichi's posture.

"Is there anything I should know?" Kakashi asks after a moment, doing his best to sound casual.

Inoichi sighs, though an amused smile curls across his face. "I'll give you the report as soon as I finish writing it, you know that. It might be a little while before Natsu-san wakes up, he's still recovering from breaking into Naruto-kun's room. I'm sure he'll sleep through the night, and be just fine by morning. Did you need anything else?"

Kakashi shakes his head.

"Alright then. I need to get back to work, but please don't hesitate to let me know if anything else happens. Have a good day, Hatake-san." Inoichi dips his head slightly, then turns off and walks away without hesitation, leaving Kakashi outside the door with two wide awake genin he's going to have to deal with.

He resists the urge to hide on the roof for an hour or two and then tell them he got lost getting back into the room.

Their faces would be priceless though, he muses, slipping out his book as he turns and reluctantly opens the door.

Naruto tries to jump on him before he even gets in, and he sidesteps the blond, meandering casually to the back of the room, where Natsu curls tight on his own bed, body still tensed in pain.

"Is Natsu okay?!" Naruto yells. "Did those stupid doctors hurt him? I'll fight them, dattebayo!"

"Dobe," Sasuke scoffs, "You couldn't even keep them from knocking you out."

"What was that, teme?!"

"This is a hospital," Kakashi chides, trying to intervene before they start another fight. "Keep your voices down."

"Hn."

"Oops! Sorry Kakashi-sensei!" Naruto whispers dramatically, and Kakashi pretends he doesn't see Sasuke kick the blond.

He doesn't get paid enough for this, he thinks as he intervenes before another fight can break out. "Yamanaka-san said Natsu should wake up by tomorrow. He shouldn't need any additional medical attention, so I'll take him home - you can run along yourselves, we'll meet tomorrow at the usual time. Ne~?"

"What-? No way! I can't just go home and- and act like everything's okay! No one even told me what happened!" Naruto yells, already forgetting to keep his voice down. Kakashi sweatdrops, sighing into his book.

"There's nothing you can do, Naruto-kun. And if you really want to know what happened so badly, perhaps you should ask Sasuke-kun." Kakashi puts away his book as he speaks, and grabs onto both the boys' collars, hefting them towards the door. "I'm sure he can answer your questions. Ta~!" Kakashi closes the door behind them, ignoring it as Naruto immediately starts yelling behind it.

He waits until he hears Naruto stomp off, Sasuke's lighter tread almost completely buried beneath it, before creating a shadow clone and scooping Natsu off the bed. They both step out of the room, and Kakashi turns toward the hospital exit as the clone heads deeper in.

No one pays much attention to Kakashi, as he slips out with Natsu in his arms and heads towards the Haruno home. He sticks to shadows and away from peoples' wandering gazes purely by instinct, barely thinking about it, and no one stops him as he finally makes his way into the residential area that Natsu and Sakura-chan call their home.

He knocks on the door, and receives the memories from his shadow clone dispelling bare moments before it swings open, revealing Haruno Kizashi clearly dressed for bed.

"Wha-? Hatake-san?" Kizashi jerks forwards, arms already moving to try and grab Natsu, and Kakashi lets Kizashi take him.

"Natsu-kun should be fine, Yamanaka-san said he should be up tomorrow as fine as ever. I didn't feel like there was any need to leave him at the hospital."

Kizashi tightens his grip, and Kakashi nearly coos at how Natsu curls closer to the man.

He'll tease his precious little genin for it later.

"Would you like to come in for a moment?" Kizashi offers as he steps back, turning towards the living room, "I'll get Natsu-kun tucked into bed, and then you can explain what happened."

Kakashi bites back a groan as he slips off his sandals. "Of course, Haruno-san. I'll wait on the couch," he responds, and tries not to look longingly back at the door as he properly enters the house.

He sorts through his clone's memories as Kizashi carries Natsu upstairs, and tries to deny the budding headache behind his eyes. Of the two nurses Natsu-kun threw out of the way in his haste to check over Naruto, one has no memory of anything, not after how hard he knocked his head against the wall.

The second had already submitted a complaint by the time Kakashi's clone caught up, hospital staff investigating both the door and the nurses' injuries. As soon as Kakashi gets done with Sakura-chan's father, he'll need to go to the Hokage and discuss everything, before rumors get out of hand.

Kakashi sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose.

These brats'll be the death of me…

Kizashi plods down the stairs a few minutes later with a yawn and a friendly smile as he settles down across from Kakashi, and the sensei pulls up his most reassuring grin. The Harunos are a surprisingly reasonable family, but he'd rather not deal with any upset parents if he can avoid it, so he focuses on exuding the best everything-is-alright aura he can as he starts to speak.

"I'm afraid it started when Natsu-kun and Naruto-kun broke into the Uchiha compound with the intent of starting a fight with their teammate Sasuke-kun…"

Natsu blinks blearily, squinting into his pillow. Everything aches, and the faint light from his drawn curtains sears into his eyeballs like he's staring straight into the sun.

He groans, rolling slightly to completely bury his face, and hears the door crack open.

"Are you alright, Natsu-kun?"

Kizashi's voice calls softly, and Natsu mumbles a muffled, "Fine," into the bedding.

Kizashi chuckles softly, and the bed dips with his weight a moment later. "Feeling alright? Kakashi-san came by with you last night, and explained what happened…"

Fingers rest hesitantly on his head for a moment before they start carding through his hair, and the simple, rhythmic motions chase away the headache throbbing behind his eyes.

"Wh'time 'zit?" he mumbles after a couple minutes, turning his head slightly to glance at Kizashi.

"Almost time for breakfast, if you want to come down," he responds gently, before standing up. "Kakashi-san did say something about training at the usual time if you felt up for it, as well."

"Naruto!" Natsu bolts upright, stumbling out of bed. Kizashi catches him, though Natsu just keeps moving, past the man and into the closet to grab clothes. "Is he okay? I never got to see!"

"Kakashi-san said he woke up and went home under his own power, though he didn't go into detail. Should I tell Mebu-chan not to bother setting a third place for breakfast?"

Natsu glances over, yesterday's dress tangled around his arms as he freezes half-way through pulling it off. "Nah," he says after a moment's pause, "I'll eat breakfast with you. But can I have extra lunch in the bento? Naruto never brings enough food for himself…"

Kizashi appears visibly taken aback for a moment, before he nods. "Of course. Come down when you're ready."

Natsu agrees, shucking off the rest of his clothes and grimacing at the bits of dried blood on his forearms and collarbone.

Guess no one cleaned it off while I was out…

He gathers up a clean set of clothes and heads across the hall to the bathroom.

He heads to the showering area, turning on the water and scrubbing quickly, only remembering to grab the hair soaps at the last minute.

He glances towards the bath as he finishes up, but if he takes the time to use Kizashi-san's potion he'll definitely be late, and he needs to make sure Naruto's okay with his own eyes before he'll accept it, so he rushes through getting dressed and brushing out Sakura-chan's hair.

He only pulls it up into a low tail, leaving some bangs to fall in front of his face, but getting it right would take ages he doesn't want to spend as he bounds down the stairs and to the kitchen, aches all but forgotten in the face of food.

Mebuki smiles as he comes in. "Natsu! I'm glad you're feeling better," she murmurs, passing over the rice.

"Me too!" Natsu quips back as he digs into the food, the table overtaken by Kizashi's quiet chuckles and Mebuki's idle conversation.

It's still awkward, eating meals together, but… it's gotten better.

It never quite feels like home, especially without the foodfights and shouting, but he thinks maybe it could be.

When breakfast is done he collects the bento Mebuki hands him with a smile, hollering back a goodbye as he stomps into his sandals and rushes out toward the training field.

"Natsu!"

He barely takes two steps into Team 7's normal field when Naruto straight up tackles him. "You're alright! Kakashi-sensei said you were but he wouldn't let us stay with you so I didn't know, but you're totally okay!"

Natsu laughs. "You're okay! I guess those guys didn't actually hurt you, huh?"

Naruto settles back, scratching his head. "Ehehe, Kakashi-sensei said they just drugged me to make me sleep, nothing more. I'm sorry I worried you!"

"I'm just glad you're okay! I couldn't really tell after all!"

"Maa, as amusing as this reunion is," Kakashi interrupts, smiling widely, "Perhaps we could start with our normal team activities?"

Natsu hurries towards the posts to set down his lunch, as Naruto grumbles behind him. "Since when do we have normal team activities, dattebayo?"

Kakashi spends the first half of the morning working with them individually, and the rest trying to talk. Natsu's pretty sure he knows that they don't plan on taking the whole Chunin Exam situation laying down, but they all spend so long coming up with whatever excuses they can that he eventually sighs and gives up.

Natsu's not about to admit that he's pretty sure Sasuke had the best excuses out of the three of them.

"Alright then," Kakashi grumbles, his lone eye narrowed at them. "I'll leave you to your own devices for the rest of the day. Please don't break into the Exam halls and try to take it. It'll just make us all look bad."

Naruto chuckles darkly, and Kakashi shunshins away immediately, clearly wanting nothing to do with that.

"Hey!" Naruto turns toward them after Kakashi disappears, bright and eager. "I told Konohamaru I'd hang out with him and his friends today if I had time! You wanna come?"

"Who's that?" Natsu responds, stretching himself. Sasuke hn's.

"Oh! He's jiji's grandkid, but he's pretty cool! He's in the Academy right now!"

Sasuke gets up and walks off, and Natsu wonders if he could tell Kakashi was still around or if he's just being a jerk.

Natsu's not even sure if Kakashi wants him to know he's around, or if he just wasn't as careful as he should have been, but he decides that talking about their actual plan for the Chunin Exams is probably a bad idea.

"I don't mind! If he's a friend of yours he's probably cool!" Natsu offers in response to Naruto, standing up to go grab his bento.

Naruto bounds past him and leads the way, eagerly talking about how he met the Hokage's grandson.

They get to an empty clearing, Naruto laughing a bit as he looks around. "Huh, I guess we're a little earlier than I thought!"

"Then let's eat!"

"Huh-? I didn't bring-"

Natsu grins, holding out a second set of chopsticks as he nudges the lid off his bento. "I made sure there was enough for us to share! Sasuke always brings his own, but I guess we're not eating together this time, so we can just share, right?"

Naruto's fingers close a little hesitantly around the second set of chopsticks, but Natsu just smiles reassuringly.

"Y-yeah!" The blond stutters, without crying.

Something in Natsu feels warm at the thought that Naruto's starting to accept peoples' kindness more.

He's pretty sure that warmth is closer to the sparks of a burning flame though, as he thinks of just why Naruto struggles so much.

Natsu wonders if Naruto would give him names, as long as he said it was for pranking targets. He shoves the thoughts away for now, but he has no intention of forgetting.

Food first!

They both dig in eagerly, devouring the bento 'til there's nothing left, and a couple of kids practically Romeo's age show up just as they finish.

"Heya Boss! You came!" One of them cries while running forward, long scarf flapping with his motions. "Who's that! Your girlfriend?"

Natsu's hands freeze in the motion of putting the bento lid back on. He tilts his head towards the boy as Naruto sputters out denials. "I'm a friend, who's… a… girl?"

Natsu can't quite say the last part with a straight face, but the kid who's probably Naruto's friend just starts laughing.

"I don't think she's interested, Boss! But it's okay! You'll win her over!"

Naruto surges to his feet. "Natsu's not my girlfriend!" He yells, glancing nervously back at Natsu before quickly looking away again.

Natsu finishes reassembling the bento box.

"It's okay if you can't win her over, Boss! I'll succeed for you!" the boy's face stretches into a wide, toothy grin, as he makes an overexaggerated thumbs up.

Naruto lunges after the kid with a war cry, Konohamaru taking off with his two friends in tow, and Natsu shrugs to himself as he follows after them.

It becomes pretty fun, the kids doing their best to dodge and hide while they run away, and Natsu's pretty sure it turns into a game half-way through - he and Naruto team up to try and track them down as they use their smaller bodies to their advantage, slipping through crowds until Natsu's got a headache from trying to track their scents back and forth across the markets.

But they haven't lost them yet, which means Natsu and Naruto are only a couple steps behind when Konohamaru crashes into the legs of a shinobi in an unusual outfit.

Natsu doesn't even realize he instinctively checked the headband until he doubles back, gaze locked onto an hourglass figure he's never seen before.

And then the foreign shinobi grabs Konohamaru by the front of his shirt and lifts him off the ground, a cruel smirk on his face.