You are all so patient and wonderful. I'll have a busy week, so this is to hold you off til I get into the juicy stuff. I'm finishing up S7ep21 in this chapter and the rest will be original content (sort of).
I own nothing, you own nothing, let's party.

Amy watched as Leonard checked his phone for the umpteenth time. Her own thoughts were on Sheldon and his utter lack of response to her lying to him. Upon seeing him, she was certain he would be mad, but true to form he showed little reaction before following Penny out.

"I feel so bad for lying to Sheldon," she confessed to Bernadette. "How am I gonna make it up to him?"

"Yea, I'd tell you what I do," Bernadette offered. "But I don't think dressing up like a catholic schoolgirl is gonna help with Sheldon."

Amy stared at the other woman and imagined indeed showing up in a catholic schoolgirl outfit at Sheldon's door. He'd probably assume she was proposing some sort perfectly tame cosplay.

"He'd probably give you homework," Leonard added.

With no desire to talk about her lack of bedroom activity, Amy moved the conversation to Bernadette. "Did you lie to Howard about tonight?"

"Of course!" Bernadette answered quickly.

"And you don't feel bad about it?" Amy asked.

"Between Penny's gorilla movie and Howard's gorilla mother, I didn't have a choice," the blonde said sounding truly unapologetic.

"Thankfully," Leonard chimed in. "Penny and I have a relationship built on trust."

Bernadette scoffed.

"What? I don't lie to her," Leonard contested.

"Yea, we know you don't lie to her," Bernadette said then took another drink.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Leonard asked, suspicious.

Amy took a drink from her own glass. Though Penny didn't lie about anything major, she did confide a lot about the troubles with their relationship. She claimed to be happy most of the time, but she often complained about Leonard's teasing and dismissal of her goals. Penny had also confessed what motivated her proposal and how the rejection really hit hard. In fact, it was because of that rejection that she had taken this crappy job. It really sounded like she needed something good in her life, and that something wasn't Leonard.

Amy met Leonard's gaze as it switched from Bernadette to her awaiting an answer. She couldn't rightly say, 'she lies to you every day and just doesn't realize it'. It wasn't her place, but she knew her friend was hurting. Instead, she went with what she hoped was a less painful answer.

"She hated the last Star Trek movie," Amy told him.

"Awww, but she said it was okay! Better than the first one even," he whined.

Amy felt bad for lying to the guy, but it was really none of her business. She met Bernadette's eyes across the table, sharing their secret.

They sat chatting for a little while as Leonard continued to check his phone every five minutes. Amy noticed he was also texting, but she was sure if it was Penny he would have said something. She pulled her own phone out. Nothing. Just the nebula she had set as a background shining back at her. She had removed the picture of Sheldon about a week ago. More guilt flooded her.

Their new arrangement had been nice at first, their kisses a welcome addition. It soon began to feel forced, however. Not on his part, but hers. While she had waited so long for something physical, when it finally came she found it lacking. There was no spark, no fireworks, just an awkwardness she couldn't shake. She couldn't figure it out, how could she be so attracted one minute and then. . .

But she knew the real answer. It had started with her awkward coworker paying attention to her. Then she found she was having more and more fun with her friends than with Sheldon on their dates. She had fun when they were with the group and she enjoyed his company, but she found herself wanting to avoid date night and go out with the others instead. As she took another sip of her wine she heard the thought that had been keeping her up at night. I'm just not attracted to him.

That wasn't all though, she knew who she was attracted to. . .

Bernadette's phone rang and she excused herself. It was just her and Leonard.

"You and I never hang out like this," he said. "Why is that?"

"I know its weird right?" she replied.

"Yea, we should do it more often."

"No, I mean this is weird right now," she clarified. There was an awkward pause and then thankfully his phone went off. She couldn't imagine being alone with just Leonard either. He was definitely not her type either.

Penny led the way down the street feeling considerably better than she had earlier. Maybe she'd convince Sheldon to follow her to a bar she was fond of on this street. Just as the thought of Sheldon in a bar crossed her mind, something much better rose up before her.

Psychic Palm and Tarot Readings, said a bright neon sign.

"Ohhh," she said gleefully. "I think I see our next stop!"

Sheldon caught sight of the same sign and stopped in his tracks. "You can't be serious. If I wanted to waste my time with nonsense I'd follow Leonard on Instagram."

"Nope, c'mon tonight we are trying new things," Penny said, not willing to pass up an opportunity to both take Sheldon out of his element and be falsely assured all her dreams were going to come true. She opened the door and led the way into the dimly lit shop.

Sheldon followed behind her. "Ugh," he groaned. "That is a lot of incense. Or someone set a hippie on fire."

Penny laughed at his comment as she approached the front desk. An older woman sat behind the counter, her dark skin and heavy shawls giving her the appropriate look of a voodoo priestess. Yup. This was going to be great.

"It's Penny," Leonard told Amy as she had assumed he would. Interesting that he had been glued to his phone all night, but Penny wasn't on the other end.

"Is she still mad?" Amy asked hoping her friend wasn't upset. Sheldon she could deal with, but she felt really guilty about ditching Penny.

"No, apparently she got Sheldon to go to a psychic."

"A psychic? He considers them not just mumbo jumbo, but extra jumbo mumbo jumbo."

"Well, Penny can be very persuasive," he told Amy. "She's gotten me to do plenty of things I wouldn't normally do."

Amy didn't doubt it, "Yea, because she has sex with you."

"Yea, she does," he said proudly.

Unpleasant sex, I might add, Amy thought bitterly. She quickly reprimanded herself though. That was no way to think about a friend. She thought of her own sex life, or rather, lack thereof and pondered her boyfriend's willingness to follow Penny's wishes.

"Can I confess something?" she told Leonard who put his phone down to listen. "Once in a while, I get a little jealous of how close they are. She really seems to have a connection with him."

"Well, Penny grew up around horses so she knows how to approach him without making him skittish."

"Don't get me wrong," she amended, ignoring his comment about Sheldon. "I know they're just friends, I just wish he'd be that comfortable around me already," And I that comfortable around him, she thought to herself.

"It took him a long time to get comfortable around me too," Leonard acknowledged.

"Really, what did you do?"

"Something terrible in a past life, I don't know," he finished an annoyed tone in his voice.

Amy was going to remark, but Bernadette came back in and grabbed her coat angrily, "I gotta go, Penny ratted me out, by the way," she turned to Leonard. "She's getting you a watch with money she stole out of your wallet." Smacking him on the shoulder, she made her way out.

"Not to be rude or discourteous," Sheldon told the woman. "But before we begin, I'd just like to say there's no scientific evidence to support clairvoyance of any kind. Which means, no insult intended, but you're a fraud, your profession is a swindle and your livelihood is dependent on the gullibility of stupid people. . . Again, no offense."

Sheldon was very annoyed at having to spend money on something that he neither believed in nor supported, but Penny had insisted he needed this to solve his 'ju ju' problem. His upbringing wouldn't have allowed him to, and given the nights events it would have gone over badly, but he was sorely tempted to walk away and leave her the shop.

"Sheldon, just ask your question," Penny pressed, looking far too entertained.

"Okay," he responded and sat silently willing both women across from him to see exactly what he thought. "I just did, what was it?"

"Oh for God's sake," Penny said exasperated. "He's a physicist and he's trying to decide what his next field of study should be."

"For your information, I was asking her about the next Star Trek movie." In fact, he had let his mind wander back to his earlier thoughts. Penny now had a dinner and a psychic reading on her tab.

"I can answer that one," Penny retorted thankfully very unaware. "I'll be bored."

Before Sheldon could come up with a retort, the psychic interrupted their bickering.

"Why don't we begin," She took a deep breath and put on a show of 'channeling.' Sheldon rolled his eyes."You're spirit guide is telling me there's a woman in your life you're having problems with."

Sheldon rolled his eyes. "That's an easy guess, I'm clearly an annoying person. I have problems with both genders."

"Yes, you clearly are," agreed the woman. "But, I'm seeing a specific woman that you're in a romantic relationship with."

Penny got excited, "Oh, Oh, here we goooo."

Sheldon was unamused.

"Does she have dark hair?" the woman asked.

"Yes! Yes, your spirit guides are on fire!" Penny answered for him bouncing in her seat. He would have laughed, but he didn't want to encourage her. He focused instead on countering the guesses with the logic behind them.

"The majority of people have dark hair," Sheldon said. "Even you at one point," he said to Penny.

"Does she work in a similar field as you?" asked the psychic, talking over him.

"Ha, no! The opposite, she's a neurobiologist and I'm a theoretical physicist. My spirit guides can go suck an egg."

"They're telling me you have difficulty being close with her," the psychic said and Sheldon didn't have a clever retort for that one. He did have trouble being close, but that was easy to derive from his demeanor.

"Oh he does, he so does. What should he do?" Penny asked for him, cheerful and unaware that he was waiting for the psychic's reply.

"He should let go of this relationship, once he does, all his other pursuits will come into focus," the woman said her eyes slowly opening and meeting his across the table.

"WHAT?" Penny and Sheldon in unison.

The woman smiled at them both serenely. "Everything will come into place once you commit to your true feelings. You will find everything you're looking for in a much different place than you expected."

Sheldon didn't break eye contact with the woman, even though he felt Penny's eyes on him. It was true that he couldn't imagine being with Amy forever, but he did care about her and didn't want to end things. She was a great friend and had a great mind. What did this woman mean his true feelings? He was quite honest with Amy about how he felt.

Following the pattern of his earlier reflection, a flashback of Penny pinning him down and playfully kissing him entered his mind. Then another of her sitting on his bed singing Soft Kitty to him. He looked up at the woman annoyed at the emotions her words had brought to the surface.

As if she could tell exactly what he was thinking, the woman smiled and said, "There is more than one way to satisfy a hunger."

Sheldon felt his stomach fall into the pit of his stomach. He did not like that sentence. Not one bit.

"You know what this is," he said hoping the small lilt in is his voice was inaudible to everyone else. "…and I usually reserve this word. This is malarkey."

With that he got up and stormed from the room. He heard Penny behind him as he struggled to find the way through the beaded curtain maze they had come through.

"Wow, you really struck a nerve... I've never heard him use the M word before."

I hope you like the way I changed the episode. I promise good things are in store. R&R and I will keep the chapters coming. More soonish 3