PROBLEMATIC
Chapter 3
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Sitting on the bench while enjoying a welcome cup of coffee wasn't really part of my long weekend plan. Well, to be honest, not in this manner, even though my new friend Donna kindly bought it for me. Yes, I do like coffee, even though I was planning to get a coffee here, but the circumstances are usually more conducive to it. Oh well. I'm just gonna go with the flow. Donna was one of those don't-mess-with-me kind of take-charge ladies, with a husky voice, even though she appeared not to be a smoker. We were sitting quietly, sipping and surveying the scene in front of us. Just quietly surveying.
Nope. I am not going to lose control. What's the point? It's not my usual MO but it does come close. I was so proud of my Honda Civic, lasting so long as it did, until now. It had the same blue all over with only a couple of dints and barely visible dents. The irony is that I don't feel anything at this moment, other than maybe this regret. Why me? I mentally slapped myself for using one of my mother's favourite admonishments. One good thing: no one was taking photos of me or my car. Probably there was no one from the Burg here.
My glorious morning had been a great start to my day. Instead of doing a quick spring clean of my apartment, I decided that exploring one of the early Spring Festivals, in a borough north of Newark was a more exciting option. The dust bunnies can wait. It was worth the long drive on this pleasant day, on my long weekend.
There were lots of stalls and ten different food trucks, just as the advertising posters promised. I had wandered around happily, sampling the wares, appreciating the displays and free entertainment, while watching families enjoy the event. I like people watching. It was nice for a change to just be a casual observer, just having some fun in the sun. Sitting under a colourful umbrella, I was enjoying a tender beef shish kebab and some freshly squeezed lemonade, which brought lovely flashbacks of making home-made lemonade with Grandma.
I didn't mind being on my own, because I could come and go on my own agenda, just as I pleased, no waiting for anybody. I really needed a break from other people's schedules. Besides, I needed some personal space and fresh air, away from the city smog and pollution, and the drama of Trenton, and all things Burg. Donning my sunnies to really get the feel of my holiday mode, it was pleasant to be among normal, like-minded citizens enjoying the wonderful atmosphere and ambience of an open air Spring festival. The organisers had gone to a lot of trouble with colourful pole banners, colourful bunting, and flags, flapping in the light morning breeze. There were so many display pots and barrels full of colourful Spring bulbs and other plants in bloom. The weather gods had done their part in making it a refreshingly Spring morning, sunny and bright.
My main aim was to locate some silver jewellery from the Arts and Crafts stalls. I found some things that appealed to me, some silver bangles, a silver ring, with a beautiful turquoise in an ornate setting, and some drop earrings. Not wanting to spend all day there since it was a long drive, I decided to grab a coffee-to-go as I was making my way to my car with my new purchases in my backpack. I had a nice stash of home-made jams and baking to take home for snacking. Rex will be surprised with his new climbing gym which was like a mini Ninja endurance course and the home-made Healthy Hamster Treatibites. They even had homemade Hamster Poptart Treats! For real! I couldn't resist them. Since it was rather bulky to carry around, they offered their delivery service for the Ninja Trail to my apartment. Great. Done deal.
I'd had good parking karma when I arrived. The drive was easy with a smooth run practically all the way back, my music cranking with all my favourites on my Spotify playlist, my windows open, loving the wind blowing in my hair. It felt very liberating. The sun was shining, dodging a few large clouds, which were all good omens, in my mind. It was a great day for sure. Choosing this weekend was a great decision, 'was' being the operative word.
I sighed and Donna patted my hand reassuringly. I knew it was too good to be true.
"Cars are replaceable, people are not. You can always buy another car," Donna placated, trying to comfort me. Ha. If only she knew. I couldn't help let the wry chuckle escape. Her surprised expression made me laugh. She probably thinks I am in shock which might explain why I have a blanket thrown over my shoulders.
"Are you alright? Any injuries we need to check?"
"I'm fine, really. I guess I was lucky."
Yeah, it's the story of my life with these types of predicaments. Been there, done that, too many times. I rolled my eyes.
The ambulance had just arrived, lights flashing as they do, sirens blaring until they came to a stop, but the flashing lights remained on.
Donna's daughter was a nurse and she had been tending to the elderly man, explaining to the paramedics what had happened, and what she had done for him treatment wise. Apparently, Donna informed me, he seems to have had a medical episode, losing consciousness as he drove off the road onto the shoulder before crashing into my car which then careened backwards into the car parked behind mine, Donna's car, which domino-ed into another parked car. Remarkably, there was no oncoming traffic as he crossed over from the other side.
I had immediately called the emergency number for fire, ambulance and police after I did a personal assessment. While I was on the phone I had an unexpected passenger, an opportunist, a wannabe carjacker. Stupid idiot had chosen that moment to roughly yank me out of my car in the hope of driving off with it, not even aware of his surroundings.
It wasn't a bad looking car, just a Honda Civic hatchback, being one of the longest lasting I have ever had in my possession. This all went down simultaneously as the old guy crashed into the front of my car, luckily completely missing me since I'd been yanked out and pushed away. Everything was suddenly crazy, loud and noisy. Ironically, the carjacker probably saved me from serious injury. The airbags in my car deployed and the idiot carjacker was trapped, spluttering in the lingering white powder, confused by the unexpected sudden impact. Of course, the front dashcam might not be clear, but it probably captured the oncoming vehicle until the airbags deployed. The rear window-cam would show the domino effect. That would be enough evidence to indicate how the accident happened while my car was stationary. Parked.
I quickly scrambled to my feet and dug into my backpack for my spray but inadvertently grabbed my perfume instead. No matter, it would be enough to sting his eyes, and surprise him further, I figured. While I grabbed the dashcam recorders, the idiot cried in pain, complaining like a baby and then tried to wrestle his way out. Nope. Not on my watch! I stun gunned him. It is legal to carry a stun gun nowadays, isn't it? I wasn't in my role as a bounty hunter, so I wasn't sure for a moment. Meh. It was a citizen's arrest. I was justified. The airbag saved him from serious injury but he was probably going to be sore. I reached in my back pack for the cuffs, just in case he tried to do a runner when he came to, cuffing him to the steering wheel.
Seeing that it was a tow-away, probably a write-off since it was scrunched like a concertina at both ends, I checked my car for anything I might need. Suddenly I smelled petrol fumes. Oh hell no. I mentally groaned. So much for a peaceful day away from all things Trenton. Could it get any worse? I knew that was a silly question and would regret it. I saw that someone was already tending to the old guy and the cars behind me were empty of drivers and passengers but I did a quick check just the same.
What is wrong with people? Some idiot passer-by, strolled past us, rubbernecking like an idiot, not offering any assistance I might add. Instead, he tossed his cigarette butt. What?! Oh no! WHOOSH! The old guy's car started to smoke and smoulder. Oh shit! Just like watching things happen in slow motion, the flames slowly crept towards my car with the slight downward gradient! Quickly undoing the cuffs, I dragged the wannabe carjacker out of my car and that's when Donna came to help me. Together we hefted him onto the bench safely away from the fiery inferno. Her daughter was still with the paramedics who had him safely on a gurney now away from the danger.
Resisting the temptation to press the panic button, I called Rangeman to let them know my car was about to go off screen. I didn't want to alarm my Merry Men. I assured Vince at reception I was alright, but he despatched me straight to Lester who was boss on deck on this shift.
"Beautiful. Your car just went offline. Are you okay?"
"I know. That's why I called. I was parked at the petrol station and suddenly my car was hit head on."
This is where Lester swore a blue streak.
"Lester. I'm alright. I was not quite in my car, which was parked. I'll explain. I have already grabbed the dashcams for the firemen."
"Firemen? Oh shit! Your car exploded? Oh, Beautiful. I'm on my way. You'll need wheels to get home anyway. Hal! Your boss on deck. Cal with me!"
I could already hear footsteps running, and the stairwell door opening as they hit the stairs while he barked out orders. I smiled. The cavalry is coming, my heroes, my Merry Men. I could hear the concern in his voice so I reassured him.
"Honestly, I'm alright. I'm just sitting on the bench, quietly sipping a coffee with my new bestie, Donna. Her car got munched as well, four cars in total, like dominoes. You'll see all the first responders as you arrive."
I gave him the details of my location. I heard him talking to Hector in rapid Spanish, recognising my name in the midst of the conversation.
"Shit!" He paused before adding, "Hector has already tapped into the dashcam feed. Cal is checking it now. I have your location. Hang in there, Beautiful. We'll be there shortly."
"Just a silly question, but in your FTA files, do you happen to have a Marty Bewkowicz?" In checking his pockets, I had already found his driver's licence and other cards confirming his identity, and some court papers."
I waited while Cal checked and sure enough, "Affirmative, Martinus Paulus Bewkowicz, goes by Martin," Cal replied. "We have had some difficulty tracking him. What? How do you know him? He's a known carjacker, aggravated burglary, armed and dangerous. Approach with caution."
"Yup. Well. He's just having a little nap next to me on the bench. I have him cuffed but you will need the paperwork. Sounds like a good Catholic boy with a name like that."
"Seriously, Bomber? You captured him? There's a story in that. You are amazing."
"Fuck! Head on?! Holy shit!"
Yep. Cal just saw the footage.
"Thankfully the crash happened in the car park, not on the main road," I reassured my Merry Men.
Yup. With the mutterings of multiple fucks, they had the dashcam feed. So, just to assure them, I took a selfie, and a brief video of the scene, showing where I was, to confirm that I was okay.
"See for yourself. I'm alright."
Did my Merry Men just sigh? I left them to focus on getting here.
There was nothing we could do for the cars as they were locked in, bumper to bumper, the crumple effect of the vehicles was truth in advertising. A messy tangled fender bender. They would have noted that. My Merry Men have a keen eye and would have done an immediate sit rep back to Rangeman as well.
Donna was on her phone and had also been checking the other vehicles, talking to the firemen, and the investigating police officers, before entering the shop. She pointed to the security cameras and the shopkeeper nodded and then she talked to some people inside the diner, probably the other car owners, asking for witnesses I supposed. As she came back outside she approached me with a curious expression as she tucked her phone and a notebook away. My face and arms had some white dust and some sooty marks from when I wrestled with Marty the idiot wannabe carjacker. Yeah. Same old same old.
The firefighters had done a great job putting out the fires and were in clean up mode, while making notes and pointing at the smouldering, steaming wrecks of what remained of our charred vehicles. I had already given my statement and offered my dashcam footage for viewing which pleased them, before they handed them to Donna. Now it was my turn to wonder at that as they saluted her politely and carried on with their tasks. The fire had also caused a small verge side scrub fire which was easily doused. Thankfully it was nowhere near the petrol bowsers.
Just as well that Tank had insisted I have front and rear dashcams. Well, to be honest, it was Hector who insisted on both. It turned out to be providential. Who would have thought so soon? That's what happens in a four car pile-up. It was like dominoes. I had already parked and planned to enter the shop, having pulled over to get some snacks from the petrol station and a coffee from the diner. From there things went to shit. Perhaps I should have kept going to Trenton, but common sense said to take a coffee break before the last part of the journey home. Rest along the way and stay alive. You know, don't drive tired. Ironically, it is a known fact, that more accidents happen when people are close to home.
Damnit! Another car gone to car heaven and I was pissed off with him. I undid the handcuffs and cuffed him to the bench so I could move freely. I was watching the police cordon off the area. They had spoken to Donna and she was indicating what had happened. She looked like she was in authority. She came over and sat down again.
Donna watched me curiously a small smile creeping on her visage. That's when she handed me the coffee, extra creamy, frothy and sweet, just as I like. I thanked her, as we bumped cups in the usual 'cheers' manner. The remaining two coffees in the four cup cardboard carry tray must have been for her daughter and my wannabe carjacker, now a confirmed Rangeman listed FTA. I must have zoned out a bit because I didn't recall her getting the coffees.
I called over the paramedics for my wannabe carjacker idiot. They did a quick assessment, nodding their heads that he was lucky, but was likely to be sporting a couple of shiners from the impact and maybe a collarbone fracture, and definitely a headache. Nothing that needed emergency care. They headed back to their needier not so critical but now conscious patient. That was a good sign.
"Are you alright?" Donna asked me, in genuine concern but still laced with curiosity and I detected some amusement.
"Your friend having a bad day?" She chuckled nodding her head indicating the wannabe carjacker slumped beside me, her eyes lingering on the cuffs.
"He is not my friend. He tried to carjack my car. Ironically that saved me from worse injury as he yanked me from my car, throwing me out in the process, just before the collision. So, I sprayed him. It was meant to be the pepper spray, but I had grabbed my perfume instead." I grinned sheepishly and shrugged my shoulder.
She chuckled and nodded, giving me the go on gesture. "It had the same effect. When he tried to wrestle me out of the car, he was still a bit confused because of the crash and the airbag deploying so suddenly, I decided it was safer to stun gun him. Then I cuffed him to my steering wheel while I checked the other cars, but also grabbed my dashcams. In actual fact, I made a citizen's arrest, but he didn't hear it, you know, because I zapped him."
She nodded knowingly, a smirk evident when I explained about my capture before turning into a full on grin. She had pulled out a notepad and wrote some details down. Of course! She smiled as I figured it out. She was in authority, that's why she was so calm, in command, and in control. I should have recognised it in the first place.
"You did well. I saw you checking the other cars as well. You have experience with this sort of situation?"
I laughed. I couldn't help it.
"You could say that. Not my first rodeo." I was being evasive and she knew there was more to my story.
She let it go. "Here comes Natalie."
Her daughter sat down sighing gratefully as she took the proffered coffee. "He'll be alright. No broken bones other than a fractured collarbone. He was limp at the moment of impact. That was fortunate for him but they soft-collared him as a precaution. It could have been so much worse. His foot was not on the accelerator so it seems his vehicle was already slowing down. Are you okay?" I nodded. Putting her coffee down, Natalie checked my face, neck and arms, silently asking for permission. "I'm surprised the paramedics didn't check on you. You look like one of those people who would play it down. It may not hit you now but you will feel the toll some time later on. Do you have someone at home? By the way, how are you getting home?"
"I know. I have some close friends who are already on their way for me now. I called them."
"Natalie is a nurse practitioner. She knows her stuff."
Suddenly Donna sat up, like she was on alert, watching with a suspicious eye. Oh joy! Things are looking up. Not! To think I thought things couldn't get any worse. Pfft! Silly me. Yes, I rolled my eyes.
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