Sorry for the delay. Took me a while to figure out how this chapter would go. But it's here, at last!

Chapter 7: Friend Like Me

In the palace back in Agrabah, Jamal sadly stares out his window with Raya besides him. All he could think about was the girl he met in the marketplace.

"Jamal...?" The prince turned his head and saw his mother standing in the doorway with concern. "What's wrong?"

Jamal sighs. "Jasira has done something terrible."

The Sultana walked into the room. "We'll set it right. But I need you to tell me everything."

So Jamal began to tell the Sultana all about what happened earlier today, about the girl.

Meanwhile, inside the cave, said girl was lying unconscious on the cave ground. Aba gently shook Aaliyah, trying to get her to wake up. Slowly she has awakened with Carpet helping her sit up. "Oh, my head..." Aaliyah groaned. Then the trio look up to see the caved-in ceiling above them. "We're trapped! That two-faced daughter of a hyena!" Aaliyah yelled. Aba shook her fist up in anger.

Aaliyah sighs. "Whoever she was, she's long gone with that lamp."

Aba chattered loudly and, like a magician, happily displayed the lamp.

"Why, you hairy little thief!" Aaliyah giggled. She took the lamp and studied it carefully. "Looks like such a beat-up worthless piece of junk. Hey, I think there's something written here, but it's hard to make out..."

Aaliyah rubbed the lamp with her hand to clean it off. Suddenly, it started to glow and a large cloud of colorful smoke poured out of the spout. It swirled magically, filling the cave until taking the form of a beautiful blue-skinned woman. A very large beautiful blue-skinned woman. She has long black hair tied up in a ponytail, pointy ears, wears lipstick, and has gold earrings. She wears golden brackets around her wrists, wears a pink sleeveless cropped tube top revealing her midriff and her navel with a matching pink sash around her waist that extends to a blue smokey tail. "I am the Genie of the Lamp." she said serenely, with closed eyes and open arms. "I will grant you three wishes. What do you wish?"

Aaliyah could only stare at this giant blue woman in silent awe.

After receiving only silence, the Genie briefly opened her eyes to look around and repeated. "I said 'I am the Genie of the Lamp. I will grant you three wish-' Excuse me, girl, where's your boss? Help me out here. Where's your boss? If I was gonna talk to myself, I could've stayed in the lamp."

"Uh... uh..."

"Hello?!" The genie waves her hand in front of Aaliyah's face.

"I'm..."

"Use your big girl voice."

"I'm talking to a smoking hot-" Aaliyah blushed and shook her head, "I mean, a smoking blue giant woman."

Imitates a buzzing noise. "Wrong! I am not a giant, I am a genie. There is a world of difference. Giants are not real. So, where's your boss?"

"My boss?"

"Look, babe, I've been doing this for a long time, uh-kay? There's always someone, you know... they cheated somebody or buried somebody... you get the idea. Where are they?"

"Oh, that someone. She is gone."

"So, it's just..." the genie conjured up a long telescope and looked around the cave. "you and me down here? And a monkey. And... yo, Rug-Girl! Haven't seen ya in a few millennia. Give me some tassel!" The genie and Carpet do their secret handshake. "So, you rubbed the lamp."

"Uh-huh."

"Okay. Say, do you mind I do some stretches here?"

"No, not at all."

The genie started stretching her body around in impossible proportions. "Oy! Ten thousand yeeeaaars will give you such a crick in the neck! It feels so good to finally be outta there." She finished stretching and her smoke tail turns into a microphone and she speaks with it. "I'm telling you, nice to be back, ladies and gentlemen." Lowers the microphone in front of Aaliyah. "Hi. Where are you from? What's your name?" The Genie held a microphone in front of the girl.

"Uh, Aaliyah."

"Aaliyah. Hello, Aaliyah. Nice to have you on the show." The genie said as a flashing neon sign that says Aaliyah's name appear.

Aaliyah shook herself. "I must have hit my head harder than I thought."

The Genie then looks closely at Aaliyah. "Say, you're a lot smaller than my last mistress. Either that, or I'm getting fatter." The genie suddenly grew a gut, and turn to the side. "Look from the side, do I look different to you?"

Aaliyah looked surprised. "Wait a minute. I'm your mistress?"

"That's right!" The Genie put a graduation cap on Aaliyah's head and a diploma on her free hand. "She can be taught! So what would you wish of me?" She turns into Xena and holds a sword. "The ever impressive..." Suddenly puts herself inside a box which she's trying to escape from "...the loooooooong contained..." after escaping the box, she pulls out a ventriloquist dummy version of herself to speak through "...the often imitated..." Then she threw the dummy away, "but never duplicated, duplicated, duplicated, duplicated, duplicated, duplicated, duplicated, duplicated..." She multiplied herself eight times. "Genie of the Lamp!" She then turns into Oprah Winfrey, while her duplicates clap for her. "Right here direct from the lamp, right here for your very much wish fulfillment. Thank you."

"Whoa. Wish fulfillment?" Aaliyah asked.

"Three wishes, as I mentioned before." Genie said, as she change back to her regular self. "And ix-nay on the wishing for more wishes. Three is enough. Uno, dos, tres. No substitutions, exchanges, or refunds." Genie suddenly sprout out legs, revealing her to be wearing blue baggy pants and pink curly-pointed slippers.

"Now I know I'm dreaming." Aaliyah whispered to Aba.

"Mistress, I don't think you quite realize what you've got here." Genie said as she had Aaliyah sit down while she discus with her the rules. "So why don't you just ruminate while I illuminate the possibilities."

Genie: Well, Ali Baba had them forty thieves

She magically conjures up the 40 Thieves, surrounding Aaliyah and creepily head towards her with swords to her neck.

Scheherazad-ie had a thousand tales
But, mistress, you in luck 'cause up your sleeves
You got a brand of magic never fails

Genie blasts them away as she grows large.

You got some power in your corner now

She turns her hands into cannons and shoots the remaining Thieves away.

Some heavy ammunition in your camp

She created a giant firework and lit it. It exploded all over the place.

You got some punch, pizzazz, yahoo and how

Genie then shrunk back into her lamp.

See all you gotta do is rub that lamp

Aaliyah does just that and smoke comes out.

And I'll say

The smoke poofs back into Genie who crosses her arms.

Mistress Aaliyah, ma'am
What will your pleasure be?

Aaliyah, Aba, and Carpet are suddenly seated in a restaurant table with Genie dressed as a waitress with a notepad and pencil.

Let me take your order
Jot it down
You ain't never had a friend like me

A cloche appears in Genie's hand and she put it on the table. She lifts up the lid, revealing a roast chicken.

Life is your restaurant

Suddenly Genie's head appears on the chicken and she kneels before Aaliyah with her wings out.

And I'm your maître d'!

Genie change back and got smaller to whisper in her ear.

C'mon whisper what it is you want
You ain't never had a friend like me

Genie tripled herself and gave Aaliyah a total spa treatment.

Yes ma'am, we pride ourselves on service
You're the boss
The queen, shahdom

Aaliyah finds herself sitting on a huge throne surrounded by piles of gold and plates of food with Aba and Carpet fanning her with large leaves.

Say what you wish
It's yours! True dish
How about a little more Baklava?

Genie buries them with food. Then Aaliyah finds herself standing besides Genie, who has a clothing stand appear.

Have some of column "A"

She also brings up a jewelry stand.

Try all of column "B"
I'm in the mood to help you boo
You ain't never had a friend like me

"Now watch me sell it!" Genie yells as she's now in a white feminine tuxedo with fishnet stockings and tappable heels, and holding a cane. And starts tap-dancing.

Watch out now! (Oh my!)
Watch out now! (No no!)
Watch out now! (My my my!)

Genie reappears in front of Aaliyah in her regular outfit again.

Can your friends do this?

She takes off her head and started juggling with it that duplicated.

Can your friends do that?

She threw her heads at Aaliyah, who's able to juggle with one hand and spin one of the heads with her other hand. Then she threw the head back into Genie's shoulders, with only one head again.

Can your friends pull this out their little hat?

Genie somehow pulls herself out of a hat and appears as a little bunny rabbit. Then she transforms into a dragon and breaths fire.

Can your friends go, poof?

A trio of handsome fire-eaters in red billowing pants appear from the fire, shirtless and barefoot. They walk towards Aaliyah, making her blush.

Hey, looky here. Ha ha!

The fire-eaters dance with Aaliyah.

Can your friends go, Abracadabra, let 'er rip
And then make the sucker disappear?

The fire-eaters disappear one-by-one. Then Aaliyah and Genie sit on a red comfy couch.

So don'tcha sit there slack jawed, buggy eyed
I'm here to answer all your midnight prayers

On cue, four other Genies dressed like angels with fake halos rise from behind them one at a time to chorus.

You got me bona fide, certified

Carpet hands Genie a scroll.

You got a genie for your chargé d'affaires

Genie and Aaliyah now got off the couch.

I got a powerful urge to help you out
So whatcha wish? I really wanna know

Genie then wrap Aaliyah with the scroll that got bigger and spin her around with it.

You got a list that's three miles long, no doubt
Well, all you gotta do is rub like sooooooooo

Aaliyah finds herself surrounded by identical-looking male worshippers bowing to her.

Mistress Aaliyah, ma'am, have a wish or two or three

The worshippers disappear as the three fire-eaters appear from behind Aaliyah. One of them was about to kiss her. Aaliyah puts her hands behind her back, closes her eyes, and lean forward for the kiss.

I'm on the job, you big nabob

The male fire-eater disappeared and replaced with giant Genie lying on her belly and batting her eyes.

You ain't never had a friend, never had a friend
You ain't never had a friend, never had a friend
You ain't never had a friend like me

Genie makes a great big show as a finale. Suddenly the cave is filled with dancers, swordsmen, gold, and more fireworks.

Ah ha ha!
Wah ha ha!

Aba greedily tries to snag as many coins she can fit into her fez.

You ain't never had a friend like me
HA!

She made everything disappear in a tornado of color, except a buzzing neon sign that says "Applause", which Carpet does.

"No, no, no. Please, please." Genie said.

Aba pouts, as all the gold she put in her fez is gone.

"So, what'll it be, mistress?" Genie asked.

"You're gonna to grant me any three wishes I want, right?" Aaliyah asked.

Genie suddenly turns into Ann McLaughlin Korologos, former Republican labor secretary for former President Reagan. "Ah, almost. There are a few provisos, a couple of quid pro quo."

"Like...?"

"Ah Rule #1: I can't kill anybody." She swipe her finger around her neck, making a sword slash noise as her head was lopped off. Making Aaliyah cringe and put her hand on her own neck. "So don't ask."

"Ah Rule #2: I can't make anybody fall in love with anybody else." Genie's head briefly morphs into big full lips and gives Aaliyah a kiss, then grabs her cheek. "My little shnookums you."

"Ah Rule #3: I can't bring people back from the dead." She turns into the Bride of Frankenstein. "It's not a pretty picture. I don't like doing it!" She then change back to normal. "Feel free to interrupt me anytime you don't understand. I'm kidding, do not interrupt me, no matter what. Now, I usually don't have to go through all of this because by the time the person gets to me, they pretty much know what they want and it generally has to do with TONS OF MONEY AND POWER!" She briefly transform into an evil businesswoman sitting on her fancy office, and put her high-heel-clad feet on her desk. "Do me a favor, do not drink from that cup. Believe me, there is not enough money and power on earth for you to be satisfied. Other than that, you got it."

Aaliyah and Aba quietly stare at each other as an idea forms in Aaliyah. "Provisos? You mean... limitations? On wishes? Three wishes? Why are there only three?" Aaliyah asked.

"I don't know, who cares?" Genie said exasperated.

"You don't know? I thought you said you were all-knowing." Aaliyah said.

"That's 'cause you don't listen. I never said I was 'all-knowing', I said I was 'all-powerful'. The most powerful being in the universe. Look, whatever I don't know, I know I can learn, okay?" Genie explained.

Aaliyah scoffed. "Some all-powerful genie. Can't even bring people back from the dead. I don't know, Aba. She probably can't even get us out of this cave. Looks like we're going to have to found our way out of here."

Aaliyah and Aba were about to walk away when suddenly Genie's giant foot stomps in front of them.

"Excuse me?!" Genie suddenly speaking like a jersey girl and has her hands on her hips. "Did you rub my lamp? Did you wake me up? Did you bring me here? And all of a sudden you dissing me?!" She stomps towards Aaliyah. "Oh no, you didn't! You did not just do that! You get your wishes, so SIT DOWN!"

Aaliyah and Aba meekly sits on Carpet. Genie shrunk back and sits besides them, wearing a stewardess outfit.

"Thank you for choosing Carpets, Camels and Caravans. In case of emergency, the exits are here, here, here, here, anywhere. Keep your hands and arms inside the carpet. Please don't forget to tip your genie on the way out." Her stewardess outfit disappears. "Hold yourself, girl, cause we are..."

They break through a small crack on the ceiling and fly off into the morning sky.

"OUTTA HERE!"

Author's Notes:

I thought of having female Genie emerge in a more dignified manner, before breaking character like Will Smith!Genie in the 2019 version. Her entrance is similar to the female genie in the 'Fairy Tale: Aladdin read by John Krasinski from Speakaboos' video in YouTube, even using the same line.

The "Friend Like Me" sequence is a mixture of the original song and the 2019 version. "Now watch me sell it!" comes from the Broadway version. The lyrics "Wah-ah-ah" is replaced with "Watch out now!" from the Beatnuts song of the same name.